(2006/10) OCTOBER 2006 MTB

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

crystallized/dee dee
my hb will rub my tummy n tell bb, "mummy very fat", then he will purposely squeeze my thighs n biceps cos now a lot of loose skin... so angry wif him... i will then pinch his tummy to make up....

 

[ilovemybabyg]

hi aspialle, my budget also arnd $1800 - $2000.Hopefully not more than $2k.can give me their contacts? ([email protected]). Thanks a million..

anyway, thanks wtan & crystallized..i guess i better speak to my HB abt it again..guess we have to come to a win win situation..honestly, i think it's so more convenient to stay @ our mum's place to do confinement...they have all the necessary items at their place...and becos of my kitchen is a modem open-concept kitchen, old folks jus dun like it...sigh sigh sigh!!! tat's one of the main reason, why mum dun want come over and she finds it more convenient to work around her familiar place... and lastly, not tat we dun like our MIL, frankly, we JUS DUN WANT any unnecessary conflicts..

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

coral,
dun take too much mei2 cai1. i dunno y but my dad says cannot take too much. so even when he cooks it, i can only take like 1 spoon or 2 the most.

 

[happybride]

Wendy
I am hoping to hold baby till 2nd oct too. But think it's highly unlikely

Vivian
When baby kicks you too hard, change position. If it does not help, move ur body. my twins like to kick me at bed time too. then I will sleep on the side and move my body slowly and a small angle, rocking them and myself to sleep hehee

Aspialle
My parents too leh refusing to take my money liao, after some pushing the money here n there. Finally took, but say save up for my twins wor. Told them to take until I resign but they dont understand

Think parents are all like that

Carol
I shifting in to stay with in law too. Dun know when can I shift out after that

Mothercare sales
================
Anyone any idea when is the GSS for Mothercare?

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

ilovemybabyg,
i'm sure u will work things out eventually. dun stress now ok. dun talk to hb when u fuming. cool down first, think thru wat u wanna say to him then go approach him again. m sure he will listen eventually... all the best.

 

[ilovemybabyg]

hi selina..yah, i will oni talk to him again when i've cooled..for now, either he will flare or i will collapse if we hav not cooled euff..

 

[snowpooher]

ilovemybabyg,
Your budget for CL is high le. Market rate for CL is $1.8K now. Have you think of ordering confinement food from catering? The price is about $1.4K.

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

ilovemybabyg,
u may consider jenny's suggestion. then just get a part-time maid to come help wif housework n washing of bb's clothings etc. guess if u breastfeeding, u will mostly likely b looking after bb on your own then. so can consider. tis is also 1 option for me.

u can check out this website. http://www.natalessentials.com/aboutus.html

 

[coralmarine]

Selina, I think it's crystalized who wants to know the price of the strecth mark cream.
Hey, I like you tummy, though protruding out, but looks compact. That's the skirt from swell rite? They also ask me to buy, but didn't since I seldom go out no chance to wear leh. Ok, I'll not eat too much mei cai, it's more for hb. I'll prob eat the other vege I cook. Cos hb don't eat vege, but at least mei cai he'll eat, so I tot givehim some fibre.

ilovemy baby, if you want a CL get one fast cos I had difficulty booking. If not consider the suggestion of part-time maid, and cater confinement food.Anyway, I duuno why but most man like don like their wife to move back. Tat time I suggested to hb he got angry too. So he die die also ask me to hv CL so I wont move back halfway thru confinement.

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

coral,
sorry. like they say, pg woman very forgetful. My tummy like wendy said is more pointed lor. i realised growing outwards (front) instead of side. yes the skirt is from swell. like it cos i can still wear it after birth though there was no sale on this.

crystallized,
hope u see the post on the stretchmark cream. it is ard S$20+ to S$30+.

 

[coralmarine]

Doggiemummy, if you move in with inlaws, what's going to happen to your own place? Have you discussed with hb on how long this arrangement will be like? But if you get along well with inlaws, this arrangment is gd cos twins always need more helpers at hm.

 

[wei_kuan]

coral, remember abt taijiao.
but i also quarrel with my hubby, sometimes he will say some vuglar words accidently and I was very angry yesterday becos I am afraid baby will learn from him. seems like it is very difficult for hime to kick the habit.

 

[ilovemybabyg]

hi coral, i guess most HBs are jus the same!! and poor us, being so "xin ku" already, still hav to tolerate their inconsideration..somemore, after our birth, i think we are all probably so restless and we just want to have a peaceful and smooth confinement..

 

[stephie81]

Hi all!

It's been a long time since I last posted. But I have been following this thread from time to time. Anyway, I am on secondment for a month and am suuuuuuper free. So now can join u guys in the forum.

Anyway, I am hiring CL coz 1) dun feel good that mum does work for me as she hasn't done housework for 20 yrs. at least u pay CL, u can order CL to do work for u. 2) whilst my r/s with my MIL is good, U can't forsee what conflicts might arise when you stay together in close proximity.

Wei Kuan,
for my part, I am the one who swears alot, esp when I am at work or on the roads. I think my 'tai jiao' gone case liaoz.

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

wei kuan,
dun worry lah at least at tis stage bb still cannot hear noise from outside... my hb sometimes also but he will only scold "nah beh"... mayb ask your hb use abbreviations lor... so at least bb dunno wat it means mah...

Cherrios,
i've heard many horror stories on CL. even when u paid them, they may not listen to u lor... so i guess it depends on luck n recommendation for gd ones...

do agree wif u re the r/s wif ILs if staying close in proximity. like the saying "xiang1 chu3 rong2 yi1, tong2 zhu4 nan2"

 

[stephie81]

Selina,
yar, I heard those too. And those where they are so stubborn in their views and they force their views upon you. But luckily this one did confinement for my SIL also the last time round, so I know she's ok. But downside, this CL is abit too chatty for my liking.

 

[mommy2006]

WahK. Yesterday logged off at 5pm and notice so many posting. I only managed to read all th posting plus doing work till now.

Hi coral,
YeahKdun eat too much mei cai coz it contain too much of salt even after u washed through. No gd for preg lady eat too much of salt.
U oso bought pants frm OIO. I bought 2 pants there, kind like the material, soft and comfortable.
How much u paid for the part time maid? I hav same problem with most of u. MIL willing to cook for me during confinement period. Then I hav to take care baby on my own. B4 tat tot to hire a permanent maid. But my hb family (I stay wit them) dun like a stranger stay in the hse. And I think I really need someone to help me do some cleaning work lol. How long part time maid stay at ur place and wats will she do? Thanks yaK

Hi wendy,
Me too. Still waiting to apply the new hse frm HDB. Really hope to have own hse and just hb, me and babyKhow nice hor? hb os thinking apply the tampines BTO, still considering..

 

[vivian_phoebe]

hi ladies...
Thanks for the advices and encouragements.

My dad is back at home liao but dun seems to be better... right now, as what my hb and my mum said, he only waiting for time to go only... we see him like that suffer everyday, we also heartpain...

My mum dun want me to go down to hospital last nite coz I am preg. But in the end, still waited for their news at home till 2am++. Think Rhys can feel it lor... so have been kicking and kicking... maybe is his way to comfort me...

doggiemummy, I have changed my position to every position i can do throughout the nite but no diff... that's why I am worried... he is never like that before... usually will go sleep after some time... now my right side of my tummy hurts...hopes it is temporary.

ilovemybabyg, I also haven found my CL. My mum is still finding for me thru some relatives... think now standard rate for Malaysian is $1800 and Indonesian is $1500. This thing is like what Jenny said... heng sway thing lah... you wun know you will get a good one or not... so hope for the best lor...

BTW ladies, my MIL is thinking of making and selling bean sprouts pillows... Any one wants to order? We can do custom sizes too... if interested, let me know and we can discuss more later... just passing message from my MIL.

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

nanny
=====
anyone knows wat's the market rate for nanny for bb? hb ask me to find out leh then we decide if it make sense for me to continue working after birth or not.

 

[mommy2006]

hi vivian,
i think Rhys share the same feeling with u. he oso concern about his grandfather and keep on kicking. dun worry too much.
will check with MIL whether she wanna to make the bean sprouts pillows or not. if not, sure i would like to order frm ur MIL. let u know soon..

 

[happybride]

coral
the idea plan is that my current flat will be empty until babies are bigger, not waking up at night, then the 4 of us will come home every over the weekends. And by 1 or 2 year old, when i need to discipline them then we will go home everynight to sleep.
But hubby seems not willing to shift back to his mum's place as all his siblings are still staying there. But I told him no choice as I am not capable of loking after 2 kids and $$wise is very siong. Need help from mil

Vivian
how much is 1 pillow? Mum not making for me and mil's side bean sprout pillow was never used before, pai seh to get her to do for the babies.

 

[snowpooher]

Selina,
If is day time for 5 days, min is $600 to $650. However some nannies (very rare) charge $550. If day and night (bring on Mon morning and back on Fri evening), about $850 to $950. Once bb starts solid food, additional of $50 to $100.

 

[crystallized]

archived again?! amazing leh, ladies!

i saw a nice bump while i was scrolling up & down... whose ah? lovely!

 

[wei_kuan]

Well, sometimes I also swear and hope baby do not learnt that, but my hubby swear a lot.

Selina, nanny price from 7am to 7pm (only weekdays) is $500.
If stay overnight is abt $800-$900.

I may stay at home for 6mths before looking for a job, just like some of the mtb here.
Not decide yet.

Vivian,
May I know the price of the pillow?

 

[snowpooher]

Confinement ladies
==================
This is really heng sway thingy. I think fate plays a very impt part for both CL and confinement women. Though we pay the CL, it doesn't mean you can order the CL to do everything or anything you like hor. They have their jobscope one. And from my observation, CL usually starts to lax from 3rd week onwards. 1st 2 weeks usually quite ok. Maybe confinement women too tired or too busy to notice. But I realised once the house is only left with CL and confinment women, conflicts started.
Some CLs, ppl said highly recommended, very good etc... but when one uses the same CL, complaints started to come in. So, is really heng sway thingy. Just pray hard!

 

[wei_kuan]

Rhys is a nice name for a boy.
I saw this name at a shop last weekends.
It is a display of "RHYS" on a teddy bear, very cute. is the pronouce same as "risk"?

 

[crystallized]

wendy,
glad u hv a very +ve mindset. yah, we muz tell ourselves "We Can Do it".

last time our mummies usaully all put on weight aft delivery coz they hv no one to encourage them and oso i think they accepted the fact they r meant to remain in tt shape aft childbirth.

yah 4 the sake of our boys, we muz hang on!

bbgrace,
think shld b quite ok during detailed scan. coz gynae will scan each part of the body and take quite a while, so bb usually will move ard, thus hopefully can see. my gynae was murmuring under her breath to get the bb to cooperate, and somehow i find it works leh. kekeke

oh u another SAHM ah? i noe quite a few of u ard. juz cant rem who.

Jenny,
why u scold me ah?

i ever did tt once leh, and cheekily asked my hb while at the bus stop he noticed anything diff on me tt day? hahahahahahahahahahahhaa

had a gd laff over it when i saw his astonished face when i told him!

coral
wah u certainly can whip up a decent meal leh!

hope ur hb is plump plump now!

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

jenny/wei kuan,
tks. will take note. but i dun really like nannies cos they way they take care of bb might b diff fr ours... is there an agency for nannies? decades ago my mum used to nanny for others n she goes thru n agency. not sure now still have or not.

crystallized,
think u saw my bump.

 

[coralmarine]

Jasmine, my part-time maid charge $10/hr, and minimum 3hrs. Now I only get her to come once a wk to vaccum & nmop flr and clean the mirror and those toilets. I do other things like washing clothes, ironing myself. I did not buy pants, I bought panties. Can't remember how much cos I bought during last preg.

doggiemummy, with your current arrangements, not to worry lah. You have a place that you can escape to anytime. So should be fine.

Vivian, glad that your dad is fine now. Hope you're having proper lunch today. My mum making the pillow for my bb so won't be buying.

Selina, I think going back to work will still mean more income for the family. Nanny fees not alot. The rate I know also similar to Jenny's rate.

Crystaliized, tat's Selina's bump.

 

[happybride]

My sis's CL (malaysian) always has her daughters visiting her then end up talking watching tv together, left baby n my sis in the room. cos sis staying in woodlands. then on the last day, which is also when the 1st month celebration is held. CL disappeared after lunch without helping to clean up.

So it's really heng suay

 

[vivian_phoebe]

Hi ladies,
My MIL haven gave me the price of the pillows yet as she want me to find out got market to sell at the first place or not... since some of you might be interested, I will try to find out from her regarding the details such as the size of pillow, and of coz the price... Will try to get back to you all asap. Dun worry, I will try to cut down the price, specially for you all... hee... My turn to show bargaining skills against my MIL... hee...

Or before I asked, maybe those who bought the pillows from elsewhere before can enlighten me how much you bought and size of pillow so that I can get a lower price for you from my MIL later....

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

coral,
yah but hb wants to get a car. so i worked out in the end a good part of my salary will go to car n caregiver for bb... was wondering if it is worth it. then i might as well b a SAHM. make not much diff to me...

 

[superparanoid_mtb_selinaang]

vivian,
think there is a website offering this service. u may wanna check it out. u can try tis web link http://www.beansprout-pillow.com/rc_specials.htm

there is another web site too but i cant find it now. u can try searching using yahoo.com.sg under bean sprout pillow.

 

[mmummyjoy]

Hi Ladies,

Feel faint these 2 days

, haven't catch up with the post yet.

Can ask you all smtg? Whenever I turn to the side, use hand to support myself up from the sleeping position, I feel like my tummy goes to the center position and the pressure near pelvic hurts a bit, especially if my bladder is full, anyone also feel like tat? I a bit worry

 

[crystallized]

oh the nice bump is fr Selina huh?

COOL! yes, u obviously look pregnant! aiyoh, u so slim even when u look fr the side. dun complain abt being fat anymore!!!

Selina,
its me tt asked abt the stretchmark cream lah. think u v confused. or did coral asked abt it too? i dun rem reading tt.

hehehehehehee

ur hb same like mine. say the same things and do the same things on me. and i ALWAYS end up pinching him as well!

then i remind him tt he oso gained quite a bit of weight polishing off the fd i wasnt able to eat the last few mths. hahahaha

ilovemybabyg,
juz talk to ur hb nicely when he cools down & u r in a gd mood to iron things out. dun need to discuss when u both r heated up coz both parties will not see each other's views. tts wat happened to me lor. i can see tt u wan to go back 2 ur mum's plc v much. frankly speaking, its oso the best way since ur mum will b spending alot of time taking care of u and bb, so she oso needs her rest when she can. if she dun like stayg over at ur plc, its like she wun enjoy her rest and time there. so i feel u and ur mum's comfort is impt. 4 hubbies ah, frankly speaking, they shld b the last one to complain thru'out the confinement. wat else can they complain abt when they no need to suffer fr anything except perhaps to travel to & fro to visit u and bb? sorry ah, not trying to teach u bad things here, but its my thinking lah. coz my hb tried the same tactic on me and i told him off.

yah well said, the last thing u ever wan during confinement is conflict.

 

[crystallized]

Selina,
think std rate 4 nanny is ard $600 for day time and $800+ onwards for day+night time nanny. not v sure though.

oh juz saw jenny's postings. she v experienced liao...

 

[wei_kuan]

mumummujoy, sometimes i am also like that, my legs cannot move when i lay down for only 5mins and i have serious cramp last night, so normally i supports myself up everyday

 

[happybride]

vivian check this out... bean sprout set

http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/messages/270192/381945.html?1148361710#POST1715778

 

[coralmarine]

Selina, I see. Anyway, it's always gd to be SAHM cos 1st 3 yrs very impt to a child. Wish I could do the same, but now with committment to new house and got parents and brother to support, I think I will prob go back to work.

Mummyjoy, nvr hear your condition b4, try asking the nurse or gynae.

Crsytallized, last nite measure my hb's waist realise he put on a little weight liao so nagging him to start his exercise routine. I'm going to make him do some sit-ups b4 dinner. I vy bad hor. But I must be the discipline master at hm. I can imagine my hb and bb doing lots of mischief in future.

Talking abt cursing. My hb don't, but he'll always come up with mischivous ideas tat he won't do. But in future if bb hear, bb might take it for real and learn to be very naughty. My gal frens very exagerated leh, when I say things like "shit" they also scold me. I don't think it's so bad wat.

 

[crystallized]

jenny
i still rem ur horrid episode wif CL. 4 me, guess day time will b me & CL. by late aftn, my ILs and rest of the family will slowly b back. so dun think she can lax so much. and somemore this was recommended by a close fren. so quite trustworthy. as long as the CL din suddenly chg her attitude halfway, i hv no complains.

mummyjoy,
i think i got experienced sthg like u do. but i nvr notice the feeling one as it usually goes away.

 

[aspialle]

iLoVemYbAbYg (ilovemybabyg)
email to u liao, the CL is $1700 for 28 full days, u can call to find out more

hi selina
can see ur cute little tummy liao, haven take photo of mine....u r in hw many weeks liao?
Heard that bb below 2 years old absorb tings fast, good learning time....so i m quite hesitant to leave it to mum/in laws / maid to look after...
basically they can take care...yes ...but bb will not learn anyting lor.im also considering

hi doggiemummy
u r having twins ar? Congrats! i was hoping for tat cos give birth once enough liao hehe
if u shift to ur in law place and once they are close to both bb, it is difficult to move out later liao....cos they may be too attached to bb.To find excuse later also difficult. Actually i dun like to live together with in laws although they may be very nice people cos i always believe that our lifestyle differs and easier to get friction...

 

[vivian_phoebe]

Thanks Wei Kuan,
Think we saw the same thing. The name tag on the bear bear is removable. Well, my hb say the bear bear is very ugly so we only bought the tag.
And yes, it is pronounce as "Risk". Both of us loved this name but we hesitated coz my boy's surname is LOW. If put together become LOW RISK... dun know next time our son will become a joke when he goes to school... but in the end, after we saw the tag, we decided to use the name lor... fate lah...

hihi coral, I am eating chicken rice for lunch now liao..got colleague to buy for me as I need to be in the lab plus I too tired to walk to canteen liao... Rhys now not too active like last nite but still got kick here and there...

Thanks for the links, doggiemummy and Selina... will check it out...

 

[coralmarine]

Crsytallized, no I didn't ask, cos hb bought me a tube of stretchmark cream already.

Think our hb all take this chance to tease us abt our flabs. My hb also pinch my excess flesh alot. In the early stage he likes to say it's me who's fat not bb growing. then he realise I get very depressed abt growing fat. Now, he'll pinch then console me to say it's bb growing not me getting fat.

Jiat lat, ate lunch at 12om, now hungry again.

 

[mommy2006]

hi coral,
thanks for ur info. btw, where u got those part-time maid?
ooic..u bought panties frm OIO. sorry for misunderstanding. me too bought undies and bra frm OIO. quite comfortable.

 

[coralmarine]

Jasmine, I went online to check for maid agency and got them to recommend. The first one I got was terrible. Hb and I have to clean after her and she not shy. Sometimes tell me she tired, then don't do liao. I was so disappointed stopped having maid for a while.

 

[snowpooher]

crystallized,
I'm wearing dress that day leh! Can't imagine if got wind blows!!!
My CL was ok for the 1st 2 weeks. Perhaps I was too weak to notice anything. But I remembered my hb was doing most of the work, and my mum kept reminding him to relax and let CL does. Think CL took advantage of him lor. Anyway it didn't occur to me cos I tot 1st time father will be anxious lor. Even when afternoon, my MIL came, the CL also like tat one. She still dare to tell my MIL I finished washing and hanging the clothes, can rest le!

Selina,
The rate that Wei Kuan quoted is lower than market rate. Maybe 5 years ago one. But there are still nannies who charged this rate, but very rare. My aunt is an experienced bb sitter, so I got the rate from her. My mum is also bbsit for others, but now she is only looking after my gal.

Not all nannies are the same. It is better to get one thr recommendation. You need to observe their homes and their children upbringing. Even grandparents and our styles are different, what to do? As long as not very serious prob, I dun see a prob. Frankly speaking, I find some ang mo ways of upbringing children not practical to asians, after my own experience. Now, I let my mum does the way that comfort her most, so that my gal will be comfortable too. And I'm glad I din restrict too much for my mum, and I can work in office with my full heart. Even when my gal is sick, I need not worry too much cos I know she is in good care. Though grandparents tend to spolit grandchildren. Just make sure when parents scold them, grandparents should never step in. I scold my father who is overprotected over my gal. Lucky is, my mum won't.
I remember got one agency, not sure url is correct or not www.babysitter.com
Another alternative is infant care. But I dun encourage, cos bb get sick easily when one bb is sick. Virus spread fast. However, it trains bb to be independent. But I think for social, what we can do is, bring bb out often with bb of same age. They learn from each other.

doggiemummy,
wah liew, your sis still can tahan that CL? But why open the door to let her daughters in?

Vivian,
I saw some places selling the beansprout pillow at $8. Size, not very sure, din note the measurement, but is more or less standard size.

 

[crystallized]

coral
my hb dun even need to measure. his pants is the best measurement.

huh? i wan my hb to grow fat so i asked him to eat more, more and MORE! hahahaha wicked me!

my hb oso like tt, many many mischevious suggestions and funny ideas tt he try to implant on bb. made me irritated at times. hahahaha

 

[happybride]

aspialle
twins = double the trouble and double the medical bills ... hahaaa

 

[mommy2006]

jenny,
yeah...i do agree with u. my fren sent her 2 yr daughter to infant care. and end up her daughter always fall sick. the reason is whenever there is kids sick, the daughter will fall sick. i dunno whether her daughter too weak or wat. jz to take note lol.

 

[happybride]

jenny
on the last day, all the relatives were in CL still call her daughters over for the buffet lunch and ask if we have good men want to intro to her 2 pretty daughters ... pui
Then CL ask my sis to help recommend her service to my sis's friend

Sis in the room, CL self open the door one and only God knows if she get her daughters smuggle any food or pu ping out, when they left.