(2006/07) JULY 2006 MTB

Dear Sandy,
Hugs to you.. How can he lay hands on his you... A baby is the responsibility of bothhusband and wife. Hugs to you.

Z-lia,
My girl gets bronchitis quite freq. You need to keep up with the nebuliser. Your twins are still very young. Take care. Its a very tiring period but keep him hydrated with warm water.How long is he supposed to be on neb?
 


peach, hahahaha..
My ger got my gene, they said she looked like me.

My boy look more like my BIL, a bit far hor. hahaha..
 
hong
Janelle so cute...cover ur mouth to stop u from shouting...hahaha...my niece is 3 yrs old as well n d things she knows amazed me sometimes. but there was this funny incident when i was BFing Gillian infront of her n she asked me in mandarin, "Ah Yi, dat one can eat one meh?? bite until red red oredi!!"

another incident was when i BF in my gf's car, his son 3 yr old also went home n asked my gf, "mummy, why was baby Gillian eating aunty's belly button??" n somemore pull up his shirt pointing to his belly button..hahaha
 
Sandy,

No point regretting now. U guys made the decision so juz have to work with what u have now. Already made the "mistake" so no point making more mistakes hor. That's my mentality to keep me going cos I didn't even have plans to get married so early. If according to plan, I would be in the JULY 2012 MTB forum. hehe. :p

Hai. Anyway u guys sooner or later will have bb right? Suffer first then enjoy later?
happy.gif
 
Hong,
this is the second time he hit me liao. Stress ? He own a PC shop, I know he will stress if business not good some more this few day raining. But who not stress.. what i ask for is if he is not coming home early at least a call or sms.
Dsiitian,
that child simply come too early. just 3 month before my customary. I went through relative giving negative remarks just because my HB say he want the child. Now u see what i get in return, he already show he bo chap the day i am in hospital giving birth. I see my neighbour's husband so sweet come early morning company wife but my husband rather choose to sleep at home then go operate shop. hiaz..
 
OC,
hahaha. i think bfing is easier to explain. I dun know how to explain to my ger if she spot us making out. hahahahaha...

Sandy, i agree with dsiitain. I believe some negative thots can be triggered during our down times.
 
hong,

lucky leh.. i would have been so happy if my girl looks like me. nice to have a little version of me (narcissism at its greatest). genes is all by chance one. what if I have 2nd one and still dun look like me!!! growl...
 
Peach,
Ya reget no use. What to do.. we ROM on 24th June 2005 not even 3 year cannot divorce. I think there is communcation problem with us. But communication cannot be 1 sided leh.. he always don't listen finish , then just walk away or no reply at all. haiz
 
Z-lia
Germanyn can pull herself up to standing position!!?? she is really one of d fastest developing bb here "applause"

blessings
u can scroll up to d earlier post by Zoe on wat r d other suitable fruits to give bb, think she just posted last nite
 
Peach,
you see your MIL in Kristen... hahaha
Yep, genes is by chance, but didn't expect my chance is so little until only see my mouth in my girl!!! Yep, I am thinking scarly my no. 2 also looks like my HB, then nothing from me to leave behind for the generations to come liao ... hahaha

OC,
The kids comments were really cute and innocent
happy.gif


Sandy,
I agree with Dsii, please do not think you should gone for abortion... pls pls. Your little one is so innocent. I know it has been hard on you, having to work and taking care of baby, but since we are already a mother, just have to make the best out of the current situation.
 
lala
ya when i preggie pple say if girl better look like me but...i was keeping my fingers cross dat my bb wont inherit my nose cos i prefer daddy's nose...in d end...sigh...d moment she came out i saw my nose on her

peach
heheh narcissism ah...actually i opposite thinking leh. maybe cos have been looking at my own self in d mirror for d past XX yrs so a bit sick n tired of d face liao...haha...so dun mind my ger looks more like daddy
 
sandy
2nd time??? wah...no gd no gd..must make s stop to this leh...what if got 3rd time..4th time..*choy choy* and what are u going to do? not encouraging u lah..but u must know how to protect urself leh...take my fren as example...she was beaten on the 1st yr of their marriage...and it dun just stop there....for 7 long yrs leh...sometimes my fren will hv bruises..but she never go make police report...becos she tot he will change..and kept giving him chances,.finally ..now processing divorcing..she gave the reasons...hb violent..but she got no prove...now hb wanna fight son's custody...my fren knows her hb violent..will not able to take gd care of the son..but she cannot do anything..cos she got no reports or documents to support her..so now...have to go court case loh..im not asking u to make reports to divorce him..but to protect u and ur bb..if anything shld happen later...but of cos...i hope ur hb will realise his mistakes lah....
 
sandy
agree with dsii, this is SERIOUS matter! u have d power to do something n put a stop to this,u n ur bb dun deserve to go thru all these...
 
Dsiitan & OC,
how to ? We married last than 3 year leh. Talking about violent, he now hit me i really wonder will he do the same to BB.
If he is really stress over work or really nt happy me because of some reason than say so. He nt speaking up.. haiz. How to stop ?
 
OC,
I remembered when I was preggie, me and HB were telling my girl then that which features she should take daddy and which one to take from mummy. I remembered I said mouth, take from neither of us and eyes from mummy. Then the very 1st thing when I saw my girl was she has the exact same mouth as me !!! Eyes? daddy's!! My HB said she must be very sleepy, thus anyhow pick loh .... kekeke But my HB is really pleased, saying that most top ballerinas in Beijing has the same small eyes and oval-shaped face !!!! ... errr ......
 
lala,
somemore both my MIL n FIL are lefties, all their children righties. So sometimes when Kristen demonstrates her preference for her left hand... wah my MIL is deliriously happy. She actually said "YAYYY!" when I was talking about it. (SIGH) But I know la.. they will only have preference when they are a few years old. Not that I mind Kristen being left or right handed...


OC,
I dun mind look like daddy also... but look like MIL? hai. But at least Kristen has bigbig eyes...Only when she laughs n her eyes become smaller that it becomes very obvious looks like MIL.


Sandy,
what do u do when he hits u? do u tell him off? does he know that u could go make a report against him? let him be aware of the possible consequences so he will try to keep a lid on his violent tendencies.
 
Peach,
I told him off.. I say i can SUE him for it. He just keep quiet. If i am not calm just now, i would go to police station and make report already but think of BB i hold back.
 
sandy
u shld make a report...not to threaten him using the report..but to protect urself and bb in future....!!!!!! my fren realised her mistake for not doing so last time...if she did...then she wont hv to fight custody..her son will sure under her custody... pls sandy...dun think of dicorce...making a police report is not to encourage u to divorce leh..but as a protection...at least he knows u mean what u said...at least next time he will think b4 he lay his hands on u again...
 
Dsiitan,
Now pass few hour liao, the redness got except a cut on my hand from his sharp finger nails. What to proof that i am being slap... haiz
 
i oso dunno...but of cos u must decide for ur own...we can advise but not insist u to do...u think think loh...hope this slap will be the last time liao...u take care ah!!..
 
Sandy
Pls stop having the thots of regretting not aborting ur baby. U know our babies will sense wat we r thinking. Ur baby will be very sad if u keep having this thot. It's no fault of the child tat u and ur husband are not cautious. Since u already gave birth to him, then u have to be responsible for his well beings from now on.He has no choice over who his parents are. Do you know how many couples are dying to have but couldn't?You are blessed with a healthy baby, pls treasure this precious gem.
 
Dsiitan,
don't worry even i have no police report , i have his shop neighbour be my withness. She withness how violent he treat my doggy & i also told her when i got my first slap from him.
 
peach,
No wonder your MIL is so happy !!! Anyway, good to have your girl looks like her coz then she will be her pet
happy.gif
Kristen's eyes take after you or your HB then ??

Sandy,
Do your parents know? I don't know if calling the police will affect your relationship with HB. Maybe should let your parents know and let hime know that your parents are aware and standing-by you.
 
sandy
provided ur neighbour is willing to witness...u know some ppl will keep quiet one...u think he/she not worried ur hb will go n create trouble ??? u wont know rite!! wat i think from now on...u must know how to protect n when to fight back....
 
lala & Dsiitan,
my parent knows already. I left the house and sit at my void deck till my mother come home. ( she wrk as cashier in KTV). I totally give up on him liao.. what is the chances of winning the custody ?
 
sandy
if u have made d decision to end d marriage, would agree with dsii to make d police report first as a safeguard. though im not a professional in this area but chances very high dat u will win d custody for ur case. u hv ur parents support then dats gd.
 
yea sandy.. my hb push me to bed before and show me his fist in rage. i tell him to go ahead, he lay a finger on me i will report police, just opposite my hse only, very convenient i told him. Let him know you're serious. but after that my hubby slap himself several times for pushing me in the first place...

stand up for yousrself if it happens again.. I'm behind you!!!
 
sandy
aiyo..me not encourgng u to divorce leh...dun get me wrong..but i want to say is protect urself and ur bb..i think the most impt thing is u need to know y he suddenly changed to another person..u said last time he not like that one mah..y now like that leh? issit becos he cant cope fatherhood??? or anything bothers him? as a couple we shld confide in one another..if not married for wat?? its a lifetime commitment leh..not play play one ah...u must hv love him if not y married him??? now pls dun think of divorce him...then hv u ever think of ur bb? try communicate with ur hb...maybe he dun open up now...but if u ask him and show him ur love and concern slowly..he will tok to u...u havent try or give him chance to explain/change...cannot be so impulsive lah...
 
Sandy, hugs to u. Dont be too upset abt it. I know its hard to control but for the sake of yr BB, you got to think thrice which route u wanna take, of coz we be here supporting ur every decision.

U need to get evidence of him abusing u before u can go to the police and apply for "bao hu lin", once he lays hand on u, go to doc immeditately to certify the injury then use the report to go to the police. Abit ma fan, but thats the way it is.
Changing in front of BB: Haha I do that always.

Quarelling: I had a big fight with hubby yesterday in front of E. He snatched the phone from me and in the midst of struggling, someone's hand accidentally hit bb's head. I regretted... really regretted. Like Sandy, I kinda of regretted marrying or even have BB. But then again, E's smile really brighten my day. I thought thru the whole night... Whatever I do.. I will definitely put BB's interest at first even though it means sacrificing myself (in a love war).

Taking after looks: My boy 100% like me. Haha. I cried and cried when I first saw him. It's really my son loh i told my hubby. but I read in a mag that everyone has 36,000 genes and they will be shared equally among the daddy and mummy, not just interms of looks.
 
aiyo..PM... fight again??? hmm..for coming home late har??? hmm..now hor...all hb must go for course liao..how to be gd hb and daddy...very cham leh....
 
sandy
ya be strong,no matter how it turns out in d end, u n ur bb must live well n happy...may God bless u

PM
no wonder i didnt cry when my bb came out cos dun look like me...haha..eh but my hb also didnt cry leh...

aiyo baby E genah when both of u fight ah? sayang sayang...same i felt so bad n apologised to my ger after quarelling in front of her.
 
lala,
more like my eyes la.. my eyes are much bigger than hubby's n MIL eyes. their eyes small small one.

PM,
speaking of genes not only affecting the looks. hehe. I just remembered what my daughter takes after me... her hairy arms. hurhurhur.. not so obvious ba, but definitely my hairy arms. haha!
btw.. take care. maybe really isn't so good to quarrel in front of bb...


sandy,
hope u dun make rash decisions now also. *hugz* be strong for ur bb k! first step is try to reason with hubby. he HAS to listen otherwise nothing will get solved. i guess u must be calm n be more tactful in what u say so that he will listen to u instead of making him shut down.
 
OC,
harnor. i wasn't the first one to notice it. my cousin made the observation at the 1st month party. say bb looks like daddy n the daddy looks like the granny.. so bb looks like granny. at first when i heard the logic i didn't like it lor.. and dun wan to agree n dun wan to believe. then recently after cutting my girl's fringe (sigh.. looking more toot-toot) .. n took a picture of her laughing. It hit me. really look like my MIL.


OH, n ladies, if you need some cheering up.

this i like: http://www.abercrombie.com/anf/lifestyles/html/homepage.html
nice back.
swoon.
 
Hi Blessings,
U can try avocado. It's good as 1st food for bb cos it's creamy in texture.

Hi Z-lia,
Wah, ur gal so fast can stand up already?!

Changing in front of bb:
I think it's fine to change in front of bb now cos they're still too young to understand. But once they turn 2yrs old, I think better not lor. Cos last time my sis change in front of my nephew. Then he will compare my sis's breasts wif other aunties leh...somemore go around telling ppl.

Hi Hong,
My gal dun look like me at all!! She looks like my hubby & FIL combine. LOL!! When I bring her out, nobody knows she's my daughter.
 
i read from a book by a bb expert in bb's brain development that when they are a foetus inside d mother's womb, they can already sense n absorb mother's thoughts n feelings.

thus, sometimes when babies cry for no obvious reasons in d middle of d night (meaning not hunger or sick), it could be due to unhappy memories from d time they were inside d womb. eg. they still remembered that their mothers ever thought of aborting them, n this memory will stay with them n affect their future development n perception of this world n things around them if it's not eliminated.

d mothers should eliminate these unhappy memories from their babies by looking them in d eyes n apologising to them for having such thoughts then. thank them for coming to this world n bringing so much joy, tell them they are loved n would never be forsaken again.
 
YB, hahaha..
As long as they took the better feature will do.

Sandy,
My mother ever file protection order against my father, cos he is violent to my mum. I dun want to go into it cos i dun think ur case is as bad as my parents.

I believe there is still love in the relationship so dun give up the family only for small hicups. Life is not smooth, we learn our way over yrs. Try to work it out with ur hubby.
If this is not a gd time then cool down 1st and resolve the issue together.

Hitting - dun ever let him lay his hand on u again. Hand are mean to love each other not for hitting the beloved.
 
PM,
at least your HB never lay hand on u.
Dsiitain,
I already totally ignore him. I used to call him by 2045 if he is nt home yet but i waited until 2130 then call. I already kept quiet for the whole night waiting for him to explain himself for being late but he never. I think his Shop , $$ & computer is his top most pirority.
 
Hi Sandy,
Mayb ur hubby's priority now is to make enough money for the family & raise up ur bb? We all know it's not cheap to raise up a child in S'pore. I know my hubby's main concern now is to work hard & provide well for our family. Somemore I'm not working. So I guess it's really a huge burden for him to carry.

Last nite after work, hubby came back super early to apologise to me. I didn't wanna make a big fuss since he apologised, so we're fine now.
 
Mrs Tan,
my reaction not fast like u leh...i only learn what is WOMEN CHARTER this monday during my Law lesson so i only know man cannot touch or lay hand on women irregardless. LOL
 
YB,
if he is the only sole bread-winner , i can understand but i am also earning $$ back home. I can earn more $$ than him any time. He sit in shop 9 hours a day , out of that 9 hour how much sales can he earn. And nt everyday sure have that amount of sale. Whereas for me I work full time and ac-hoc HPB sure $$ inside my pocket.
I already forgive him once for hitting me. My limit up, I lose my trust on him already.
 
Sandy,
Dun ever bring up that u earning more than him. It will dampen his ergo and it could make it worse. YB, may be right. Since u can earn more anything then he may be bucking up to provide better life for him.

May be he doesnt know how to control his temper.
 
peach
ya sometimes when u see photo looks more like as compared to looking at her direct hor...guess u gotta accept d fact liao...haha..it's ok they will change as they grow
 
Ha.. I went toilet just now. I realise my left cheek a bit swollen. i got burise on my right fist and cut on my elbow. Got proof liao. I am going to see doc later.
 
Sandy,

My advice to you, file a protection order 1st. Next, pack up, go back to your MIL place to stay. No point staying in a house full of violence. If he do it not once but twice, and did not know his mistake, some actions have to be taken. Anyway, he is not helping much in taking care of the baby anyway.

Until he "wake" up and beg for forgiveness, then make him sign some form of promise that he make like be home by what time, not to hit you again etc in black n white as proof in the future.

Last but not least, don't have to wait for 3 years to file for divorce, you can always file for a separation 1st, once 3 years up, you are offically divorce.

Having said all that, no one here really wish to see both of you divorce. Try the 1st approach 1st, if he still don't wake up, then proceed to the last approach.

Last but not least, pls take care of yourself, no point looking back and thinking last time should abort or not, it's not going to change anything. Look forward to your baby for joy and comfort be it alone or with your husband.
 
Sandy,

Nothing much will change, however, if he ever laid his hand on you again, he can be charge and be sue in court. Exact details, check with the police officer on your rights.
 
Liverpool,
but most ppl now on his side. They say i am always throwing temper & the way i talk to him is not in a proper tone and is harsh. He told my parent he 'REN" enough of me liao. For asking BB is it hungry etc and commanding him to go make milk ASAP. Hiaz.. sound like i am at fault for the violent.
My mother house is the only place i can stay. He & I haven got a house of our own. sad hor...
 


Sandy,

I can't really advice you much, but I always a very neutral person. I cannot just listen to your side of the story and judge what is going through in your household. However, no matter what, at the end of the day, no matter how frustrated, angry or stress he is, he shouldn't laid his hand on you.

I always stand by it saying that a marriage takes two hand to clap, communciation is a must for anything to work. When a baby comes into the picture, both parents are RESPONSIBLE in everything. There is no spilt job scope. It is our baby, be it feeding or changing diaper, both must work hand in hand for our little one.
 
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