Viagra only work if the guy is impotent...Have you tried experimenting with viagra? Many couples get better after that.
I’m curious to know how often do married couple with kids have intimacy?
Before getting married, we didn’t do the actual deed. After we married and before having kid, my hubby is already having a very low sex drive. He can don’t ask for sex one. Also find it hard to stay hard for long if we do it at night. Morning is much better for him.
I don’t like to always be the one to initiate but I would think doing it once a week should not be too much to ask for. Or am I wrong? or maybe once every 1.5 wks. sometimes he has to travel and stuff like that, or either one of us fell sick. We probably do it once a month only, and that’s even after how I always say I have high sex drive as a woman and would love to have regular sex.
When I was pregnant, he said he couldn’t bear the idea of having sex knowing baby is inside me. So for the whole 10 months he just didn’t want to do it. And for the 7 or 8 months after baby is born, we didn’t do it either, busy with baby stuff and so tired n all. and when we finally did it after such a long hiatus, he can’t last long and shoots very fast. less than 3 mins of everything.
I have been expressing my displeasure that he’s not keen to have regular sex, and as a result he’s stressed and feel obliged to do it. i know it will affect his performance as well. There are times when we try to do it at night but he couldn’t hold the erection. I cried in bed after that.
When we quarrel over other things, n he start comparing me to other wife more gentle and encouraging bla bla, I will also start saying things like he also doesn’t give me sex or satisfy me. or when he says he feels that nothing he does in the household is right in my eyes, say that I always pick on him, somehow the conversation will lead to me expressing my displeasure, that he doesn’t satisfy me sexually and maybe that’s why I don’t feel truly happy being with him. I brought up divorce many times cos I don’t feel happy being with him.
I know it’s not healthy to keep mentioning divorce, but I am serious about divorcing if he is agreeable. I also sat down and talked many times to him about how I don’t like our sex life at all. I feel deprived. Our relationship has deteriorated after having a baby. Stress and lack of regular intimacy.
Anyway, yesterday we quarrelled over other things again. Then led to me complaining about lack of intimacy, he said in a fit of anger to go find other guys then, as long as don’t bring home, don’t affect my baby. I said fine. And we still aren’t talking to each other since yesterday’s quarrel.
He’s a very good father to our baby. Everytime i reconcile with him (even after me mentioning divorce) and still stay in this marriage is because of our baby. Deep down I don’t feel happy being in this marriage but what else can I do?
Have you talk to him on why he's afraid of having a baby? Is he afraid since the beginning? Or just after marriage?Got ppl tell me its very abnormal for married couples not to have sex but in my case, he’s very afraid to have a baby. We are still childless after 7 years of marriage.. I ever conceived but it didn’t work out, n its been 4 years... since then he realised i can actually conceive *-* anyway I have pcos so it just makes it harder for me to have a baby... I’m turning 35, he’s 36 this year...
Other then always shying away from the topic of having a baby, his attitude towards me remains unchanged...
Got ppl tell me its very abnormal for married couples not to have sex but in my case, he’s very afraid to have a baby. We are still childless after 7 years of marriage.. I ever conceived but it didn’t work out, n its been 4 years... since then he realised i can actually conceive *-* anyway I have pcos so it just makes it harder for me to have a baby... I’m turning 35, he’s 36 this year...
Other then always shying away from the topic of having a baby, his attitude towards me remains unchanged...
Initially we got married and planned to have a baby, but, since i have pcos, it will be a miracle if i do conceive. So we sort of go with the flow. If i have, then it will be good, but if i don't have also not stressing each other over it...
He did tell me that previous pregnancy i had (in 2014), sort of gave him some trauma. I didn't have much morning sickness, but i got very bad headache... by lunchtime i would have taken 8 panadols.
He saw what i went tru then and so he did say if a pregnancy is going to give me so much trouble, he might as well not have a baby. But im now much older, and i strongly felt its about time and my body can't wait any longer... =/
Im going for iui soon. I told him try for help, then at least if it really didnt work out then at least we wouldnt have regrets in life. He give me a sianz -_- look. Tbh im damn pssed at his aimai aimai attitude cos i will be one going tru all the injections etc
N im also prepared to be e sole caretaker if i have a child... he sometimes don't even come home. Or either that, till late 2am+ when im fast asleep. How to try naturally u tell me...
Tat is well very trueIs he not ready to be a father?
Why he came home that late? Cause of work?
Well, my wife told me this, doesn't need a bed to have sex...
Same for your case.. Even if he return late, you both can have intimacy if both want...
Tat is well very true
Really dunno la, like u grow older ur energy levels goes down, sex drive also goes down... i feel he's very afraid of the responsibility that follows -_-
Tat is well very true
Really dunno la, like u grow older ur energy levels goes down, sex drive also goes down... i feel he's very afraid of the responsibility that follows -_-
Ever discussed with him, he said he’s not that noble to adopt. So I think I will try to have my own.starlights, try commununicate more with him, and tell him you really hope to have a children.
If he's really care/scare of you of the pain of giving birth, can try adoption.
Ever discussed with him, he said he’s not that noble to adopt. So I think I will try to have my own.
At times I really feel something is lacking in our life, and I hope we have more common things together...
Viagra can be taken only after doctor's consultation, it is very serious medication with multiple side effects (as it increases blood pressure crazily) . If a doctor approves viagra , then you can think over ordering it online, but not earlier.Have you tried experimenting with viagra? Many couples get better after that.
..
But again, kids is impt to have a complete family... But then there are still many couple whom did not want to have kids...
So it's a choice of both ba...
How to have kids by your own? Need the man's sperm ba...
Ya i feel so too. Especially when u see ur younger siblings n cousins all cousins starting to have kids...i feel nobody will understand that u have fertility issues n some of e passing remarks or small talks really hurts. sigh.
So anyway i started my iui treatment.. walao i really salute myself (self praise lol) by doing all e jabs myself... go appt / scans also alone 1, but im not really complaining or feel anything is lacking, guess im overly independent liao...
My ex used to have the same issue with low sex drive, albeit not all the time. On some occasions it got so bad that he would lose his erection during the deed. He was going through a difficult period at the time at work and was feeling a bit lost though.
I took it upon myself to dress more sexily and try to move his mind away from work at home. Viagra also helped a ton, as that reduced his performance anxiety.
Hope it helps.
Contradicting to your suggestion, I am considering downing a few norethisterone to curb my desires rather harping on it.
I thought the viagra worked, but of course everyone should consult their doctors.Wear sexily is one way. But well, I think probably he's really tired. Viagra may or may not work, as I understand from doctor, it's mainly for impotent people. Since your hubby have no issue in erection, I don't think should consider viagra
Agreed!You can try arrange for a short holiday for you both. Or even just had a nice meal together, and can even go for a spa treatment. You both can enjoy, and also, can have some ahem in the jacuzzi... =D
I thought the viagra worked, but of course everyone should consult their doctors.
Agreed!
Oh. Sorry for that - I suggested Viagra because my ex's issue was maintaining erection.Unsure wor. As according to my doctor la. My hubby wanted viagra cause he have PE.
Then doc say viagra not for PE. And more for those impotent people that 'cannot stand'.
haha.. nothing to sorry about. I think depending on individual issue/problemOh. Sorry for that - I suggested Viagra because my ex's issue was maintaining erection.
...
Now, 4 months ago, we shifted to our new apartment, things are neater and our sex life took an overhaul. Sex became every-other-day affair. To my surprise, I started craving for it more. He seized every chance to initiate too, like, while our boy is at tuition etc. I never said no when he asked for new/erotic sexual favours and often thanked me for satisfying him. However, while l’m all ready to take our sex life to a new realm, he suddenly rejected all my sexual advances, naming tired, tight schedules at work etc. He would only briefly touched me then started snoring. I could not believe how weird this sudden change is. I do not want to pester him and make matters worse. But 2 months passed, VDay passed and my bday passed, nothing happened. My turn to be left 'sex-starved'. Im pretty upset.
We are both providers, he’s a good nurturing father who comes home everyday. What to do to restore this situation? I understand you ladies posted a year ago, perhaps things got better and you can advise me if something possibly went wrong.
I guess when it’s really too confined space makes people all stress up etc... sigh.
Sometimes I feel sex is really tiring, so perhaps age also sets in... a lot factors la. I myself have sex only like once in 2months =_= my husb either said he’s tired, or just no time... I will try to turn on my diffuser with lavender essential oil then put on my sexy lingerie n try to stroke him when he’s just out of shower... I always feel there’s always next time to try...just don’t force on him...
Men r visual creatures... out of 10 attempts, 9 times will work kekekeke... sometimes i like to "attack" him after shower. Lol. but hor, can't say e same for woman, maybe for e essential oil to dffuse, u put abit of lavender, geranium, ylangylang... or u use lavender directly to massage e temples, shoulders, then body touchy kekeke. helps to ease abit of stress n lift mood...Wow. Your husband is lucky to have you as his wife. Hope he does appreciate that
If my wife did such, I'll be more than happy. But I think is opposite...
Am the one who turn on the diffuser, and 'seduce' my wife... Lol
Men r visual creatures... out of 10 attempts, 9 times will work kekekeke... sometimes i like to "attack" him after shower. Lol. but hor, can't say e same for woman, maybe for e essential oil to dffuse, u put abit of lavender, geranium, ylangylang... or u use lavender directly to massage e temples, shoulders, then body touchy kekeke. helps to ease abit of stress n lift mood...
I would say be careful with the lemongrass tho...some pure form is really hot n may burn fingers a lil... not really 2nd degree burn that sort but aftereffect is like super dry flaky skin.Haha. Thanks for the tips. Well, Lavender mainly for sleep purpose as it does helps to calm down my wife and myself, so can have a good sleep. For normal, I use Jasmine+Ylangylang, as I read somewhere that it suppose to help to arouse one, especially the female. =X
For body, I used Peppermit+Lemongrass, so that the body will have some cooling effect as well
I would say be careful with the lemongrass tho...some pure form is really hot n may burn fingers a lil... not really 2nd degree burn that sort but aftereffect is like super dry flaky skin.
Anyway have fun bro... some form of touch is better than nth...hahaha
N I wish my husb is just as enthusiastic... oops.
It's nice to hear from a man's point of view. And may things work out smoothly for your family.
Every family has their own set of Issues. But how serious it is, is how you view it.
We have not had any sex & physical touch at all for 6 years.
......... What should I do?
Am facing the same situation sigh, glad that I'm not alone.
I'm so desperate to salvage the situation that I'm trying out this perfume to attract his attention...
It's my third day of trying, seems like it works which I really hoped it will *fingers crossed*
Wow. What perfume will that be? HahaAm facing the same situation sigh, glad that I'm not alone.
I'm so desperate to salvage the situation that I'm trying out this perfume to attract his attention...
It's my third day of trying, seems like it works which I really hoped it will *fingers crossed*
Thanks!Best of luck!
Thanks to the notifications sent to my phone, I realised I did not update since I last posted months ago.
Apparently some of you were right, it was the work stress that got into him and which took our sexual bliss. However I also notice his sexual surge seems to tip in the morning recently . I used to hate morning sex… imagine the breath and with hair tousled…so not sexy.. But in order to reignite the sparks and as I value his pleasure above mine, I 'synchronised' and it seems to work well. Thrice a week of tantric moments, I must say I can’t ask for more bliss. He's an early riser. I just have to learn to respond to his amorous advances AS EARLY AS 5AM! Read some articles that explain that men’s testosterone level peak in the morning between 25%-50% more than at any other time of the day.
So for some of you out there, could it also be the sex clocks doing tricks on your partners?
Not bohmoh rite?Wow. What perfume will that be? Haha
Haha no, I no money for bohmohNot bohmoh rite?