Support group - Miscarriages

Hi gals, been really bz at work, paiseh din hv time to come in so often...


hi stumbled_by, xuanting is right, keep yourself warm at all times, take warm drinks, keep your tummy warm, and dun get in the rain. beef up and you will do just fine!


hi pegsfur
I had kinda same prob, i put on some weight and realise i had problems with mostly the pants, skirts and jeans, and it took so long before i could fit in but with much discomfort if i had to wear it for entire day at work.

when i manage to lose some weight, i lost everywhere else except butt and tummy, so sian also... i hv since bought a couple more pants, but now dare not buy too many pieces, and i tend to buy the flexible waist kind, like elastic or tie type, in case i put on or lose weight, more importantly is I dun wana feel like i m strapped by the waist, very gang kor.. I also buy cheaper clothes, sometimes from flea markets, so that even if i grow out of it, not so sim tia...

there is a shop selling very nice preg clothes at AMK hub, it has workwear with elastic bands at waist, and it does not look abit like preg women clothes. u might wana consider getting some, then next time when u strike u can still wear. ",)
 


hi stumbled_by,
welcome here and do hope to see you join us in the thread more often. The ladies here are right.. mini confinement basically is keep warm, bu qi, bu xue. Gotta avoid all the cooling stuff and if u are strict, no plain water too.

Re clothings
i fitted into all my pre-pregnancy clothes 1 month after delivery. I realised breastfeeding is very helpful as the sucking motions help the womb to contract very fast! well of cos, there is also the daily commuting to kkh to see my son.. all that exercise did help! I also use a binder every night. other than this, i didnt diet at all cos i needed all that energy. I still wear the maternity pants at times as they are definitely more comfortable!
 
hi Tazbaby
You should continue to take your folic acid and vitamins... these are essential vitamins for ttc. Best to be taking them regularly before getting pregnant again.
I tried after my 2nd cycle but only managed to strike on my 6th cycle after d&c..


hi stumbled_by
Sorry to hear about your loss. Do come in here to talk more often if you need to share your feelings or just general chit chat...


hi xbliss
how is baby bryan now? Hope he can be home in time for Christmas!


hi gals
Yesterday I went for gynae checkup. He never measure baby CRL for me and told me not important and will only cause undue stress. Not sure if that is the truth or he "entertaining" me only coz baby not growing well and dun want to make me worried. But he did tell me everything is fine. I keep asking him alot of questions and he told me dun be so stressed, pregnancy is meant to be very happy de... But somehow, can't help feeling stressed. I guess for everyone here, getting a second chance again will also be very stressed coz of wat we have gone through. I cannot help feeling scarred and always admire those gers who have pregnancies and delivery so easily without complications and mc. But I guess all this will make us stronger.
 
hi all,

thanks for the response. I am accepting the lost of bb and I have to move on, no choice..

Do u have any discomfort/ailments/funny things after D&C, besides the spotting or slight cramping ?

This few days I observed on certain days I felt pain (the 'passage way' before the anus) when passing motion(I was not having constipation). But it did not happen everytime I passed motion. Could it be due to the D&C ? My gynea is overseas...hiaks..
 
Hi babydream,
It is normal..aft d&c,i had bleeding for abt 10 days then normal menses commenced abt one mth after the bleeding stopped.I was quite worried how come still bleeding after 7days,called the clinic to find out,the nurses said the bleeding can last between 1-2weeks. So dun worry oki?

Hi stumbledby,
Hang in there oki?We are here to support you..actually after the d&c,i knw alot of ladies believe in confinement,as for me,i just make sure i eat healthily n balanced diet while continuing to take the folic acid.It was very tough emotionally at first but days go by,it gets easier..dun bottle up,if you need to,just cry,it helps.

Hi roxy,
I understand how you feel..i told hubby tat if we strike again,i hope we dun get gripped by fear n worry cos of wat we went thru...be strong oki girl..you are blessed to be with child so just take one step at a time,enjoy it,been told tat stress level of a mum during pregnancy will affect the child's temperament next time,so jus relax n enjoy the whole process n we will all support u here!
 
Hi Stumbled_by

As mention by all, i think it is important to keep warm after D&C. else will have side effect such as body aching as some believe. And the pain you are feeling might be the body contracting while recovering.

HI PJ,
Thank you. But i still have bleeding for almost 3 weeks. Hopefully it will clear up soon for my next menses.

Hi all,
I went to see a chinese sinseh yesterday hoping that she will do something to get my body to recover soon. However the trip was like 2 slaps across my face left and right.

The chinese sinseh make some comment such as "the possibilities of conceiving is slim for me" and "so sayang that you lost it when u managed to striked with 1 embryo" I know deep in my heart that i can only conceived thru IVF but i dont need to be keep reminded of this. These words are like knife spearing thru my heart. And i tried to control my tears as i dont want to cry infront of a stranger.

I really hate it when people tell me dont worried you can try again. word like these doesnt help to relief.
sad.gif
 
Irene,
Same here .. i went shopping for some clothes yesterday and all that i could find are those that are with elastic bands one so that i can wear whether i slim down or put on weight.

I have thot of getting those nice preggy clothes like wat you mentioned but no, cos deep inside i know i can't bring myself to wear them. It will remind me of the painful ordeal. My hubby has already kept away baby clothes meant for Owen and I am packing my preggy clothes and keep it away just so that i won't feel upset.
sad.gif


roxy,
I know wat you meant. For the initial 3 mths when I went to the gynae for scanning, i kept getting myself prepared that i wouldn't see the heartbeat blinking on the screen as my 1st pregnancy was terminated at 7 wks as there was no heartbeat. So when I passed the 1st trimester, i was very relief and happy. Who knows my waterbag will burst at 4.5 mths. I'm not sure if i'll get all stressed up & paranoid in my next pregnancy.
 
hey gals, yestesday i found out my hubby has kept a poster of a smiling baby away since after my d n c, I din even noticed it. i guess i was too sad to notice at that time... but i appreciate him for it very much. he is really sweet...

hey Stumbled_by ..... i did feel quite funny after my d n c for about 4-6 weeks, it was a feeling of 'pain" but it was not exactly pain. I din know wat it was so i kept gg back to my gynae thinkin that something has gone wrong. then later i finally can put a word to it. It was actually "tenderness" at the lower abdomen. at times, i feels like a bit of cramp. I think it could be becos the womb was shrinking back to its pre-preg stage.thus giving the funny sensation.

so i start to rest more, walk less, walk slower and not to rush myself, and not to carry heavy things. It went away after about 6-8 weeks. and i also do pelvic excercises to strenthen the pelvic muscles. u can try to do that too...

Pegsfur, if u need to put them aside, pls do so, but pls try to resume life back to normal as soon as u can, not rushing thou... my gynae told me to look forward!, that's why our eyes are born in front of our head, and dun look back. so i share this with u...

hey roxy, nice to "see" u. long time no chat.

xbliss, how u doin? how bb bryan?
 
hi,

what a lot of encouraging posts here. bryan is doing very well and should have been discharged today. But becos we are in the midst of shifting to our new home, we have asked to bring him back only on Sunday.. so sad but no choice. nobody else to take care of him and we are busy cleaning and disinfecting the place. he eyes me nowadays with those pitiful eyes to say he wan "bao bao".. sigh sigh..
 
Irene,

Thanks for 'having same feeling' as me. perhaps its really my womb contracting. But I suspect I may have IBS(irritable bowel syndrome). I had this 10 years ago when I was stressful.. Perhaps this is it. Self diagnose ha..

I called the gynea who is covering my gynea(as he is overseas). He said that D&C couldnt cause anything related to bowels. Wonder is he protecting his fellow doc or that is the truth...sigh

Hard not to carry heavy things, cos my DD is 8mths old, but I try to minimise..
 
Irene,
Tks ... tats a nice piece of advice for me .. to look forward!
happy.gif


My menses finally came today, abt 5 weeks after my D&C. I'm quite glad it came as it means my body is reverting to normal pre-preg days. Hubby has planned a Hong Kong trip for me next month, as he said it's time we go away for a while, put the bad things away from our mind and like u said, start to look forward to a new beginning. I guess Hubby is eager to start ttc again.

stumbled by,
Other than not carrying heavy things, do also try to minimise walking as well. Like what Irene said, try to rest more.
 
Stumbled
I had the same problem as you after my D&C last dec. I had pain when I passed motion everytime. It was so bad that I had to go back to the hospital after that. In the end, I realised that it was caused by the antibiotics, Augmentin, which I took after the D&C. I was probably allergic to that...

You should have some relief after you finished your antibiotics...
 
hi girls,
sadly, i have to join this thread, after a fierce battle of 2 weeks and eventually i lost it.

was confirmed 4weeks preggy 2weeks back, but today, learned that we will lose the bb as its unhealthy from day 1.
HCG level has incrased at tremendouly slow speed, and eventually dipped.

waiting for preg to auto flush out and await for AF to report.

though i've mentally prepared and let go, i am not sure when the big day hits when i see red, can i still treat it so calm.

hoping to seek solace here.
 
hi ceraine, *hugs* i'm sure we all know how it feels to lose something so precious. come and talk through your emotions with us. Do remember to do a mini confinement after that.
 
hi xbliss,
thanks.

i am not sure if i should start doing mini confinement now, as its not totally cleared off yet.
some told me i can start with dome, reddates longan drink and seame chicken with ginger.

while others ask me to wait till its fully flushed out.

i am resuming work next thurs. any idea if i can do the mini confinement now?
 
hi ceraine,
oh dear i dun think i can help you with your queries... i am not a confinement advocate cos i hate those food and am more of a western medicine person. But i swear by the red date longan.. i feel it is heaty enough for me without having to take other foods. i was also on a lot of vitamins, esp calcium, iron, and my multivits. i remembered a few posts saying to avoid wine for first week or first 2 weeks though.. not sure why though.

any others can provide suggestions to ceraine?
 
Hi irene
Nice to "see'you also. Me been very paranoid and stressed over current pregnancy.. learning to relax and leave everything in God's hands
So sweet of your hubby to keep a nice smiling pix of bb. It proves he actually cares alot for you... but you know men, they just dun show it.


hi pegsfur
I'm very sorry to hear about this. But your AF has reported and you are ready to try again!
My hubby always thot pass first trimester very safe liao.. and now he knows otherwise. He was telling me, pregnancy is so stressful for entire 10 mths, and he will prob stick to 1 bb can liao. Cannot tolerate another stressed 10 mths. But some people have it so easy. Guess there are a lot of things beyond our control, just have to stay positive and take things in our stride (but that's easier said than done haiz)


Thanks PJ for your words of encouragement
happy.gif
Thank you so much for everyone's support here. I broke down in church last week and just cried my heart out to God and told Him I cannot stand the stress anymore. But I am so glad I have Him to pour all my worries to. We will stay strong!


hi xbliss
Glad to hear that bb bryan will be home for xmas. He must be so cute, keep wanting bao bao! Post up his pictures here when he's home


hi ceraine
I'm sorry to see you here...but please feel free to come in here to talk...
Im not sure abt when to do the confinement coz mine was dnc..so quite clear...perhaps the others might be able to help? Or wat did the tcm advise?
 
hi roxyz,
Yah, so sorry to see myself here too, when we were so happily discussing to c-sec on hubby bdae.
Like what you've always consoled me, everything happens for a reason.

Probably bb knows i've just changed job, my family and his family problem and felt, hey, its not time to come yet.
Probably bb sense somethings not right, hence, caused the "miscarriage" such i will build up my health to welcome a stronger one. these has been wise words of husband. Really thankful he is so supportive despite his pain.


TCM advised me to see him, say a week later? And no confinement needed at present.

Relatives telling me to start now, though MIL mentioned probably after bleeding. reddate longan and dome should be okie at present.
i've started on dome yesterday, it sucks, so strong!!!

Roxyz, you stay strong too, know you've gone through a lot on this second pregnancy. keep your faith going. when you see your little darling in june, she/he will melt your heart.
i help you spank bb butt, for making all of us worry too.
xbliss,
so sweet right, bb bryan will be home for xmas, mark down this xmas, its a meaningful one.

Pegsfur,
a short holiday is good. All the endless shopping and eating will keep you fully occupied, then night time wwoohooo away.

we might plan for a short one too.

Stumbled-by,
hope you are gradually recovering too.
how about seek a second opinion on the suspected IBS?

** my maternity clothes is lying right before my eyes. intend to sell it off.
 
Dear Gals,

Feeling heart so heavy when reading the threads again.

Feel so sorry what you gals had been as it's just like so fresh memory to me for what happened to me few yrs back.

But Life need to MOVE on and HOPE need to continue.

Never give up and keep on having HOPE with a healthy body and mind set.
 
Hi all,

I havent stopped bleeding totally since D&C which was done in end of NOV.

Is it normal to see blood clot when bleeding? The bleeding I have is fresh red and little in volume most of the time, but it doesnt resemble spotting. Does the bleeding has to stop for a while first maybe a week then menses come?

How do you all identify when is the coming of menses and which is the bleeding from D&C?

I am a little confused here. please advise. Thank you.
 
hi ximi, i think your menses will only come after four or five weeks from your d&c. by that time, your d&c bleeding should've stopped. what you're experiencing now is probably still d&c bleeding. i hope you are feeling better by the day.

hi ceraine, please take good care of yourself in the mean time nonetheless. you may want to take some time off when the bleeding actually starts so that you can have some time alone to deal with your feelings.
 
hi xuanting,
thanks for your encouragement.
i will resume work next friday. if Gynae calculation is correct, full flown bleed should sets in 2weeks from now. yes, is contemplating to take time off to deal with own feelings as well to do a mini confinement.

right now, dark brownish discharge cum black strands is coming more intensively.not sure if its flushed out already, but didnt see red yet.
hence a bit worried as well unsure.
i've stopped drinking dome(thou consumed a cup yesterday). will start on the longan and red date drink tmr, this should be okie i presume.

I am so angry on learning my ex-col announced my prengancy to the whole team of 12people, even mentioning its unstable etc.
checking with her on some hospital stuffs, but i thought anyone with a decent mind would know how to keep a secret esp after learning the bb might not last!!!!arrrggghhh....
co-incidentally i am going back ex-co on monday to collect my testimonial. i dun wish to go around being congratulated and end up having to explain myself and hurting myself once again.

i was so pissed i sms her saying i will lose the bb, and get her to keep it a secret hoping she will own up that she spread it out. but she didnt. hope she will warn the rest not to mention a word next week.
 
may i know how long after can we start TTC or resume sexual activity?
right after bleeding or after first AF?
gynae mention a patient of hers tried immediately and striked the next, and no AF reports.
does this means she didnt wait for AF to report??
cant be right, no egg release.
 
Hi ximi
Some people actually have d&c bleeding and menses all together. Blood clots are normal I guess. But if you have been bleeding for 3 weeks, please check with your gynae. I only bled for 1-1.5 days after my dnc and stopped. First AF came 30 days later.


Hi ceraine
Me and bb will stay strong. I'm learning more to trust God and be less stressed. Luckily my colleagues and boss all super understanding and nice.

Just ignore those ex-col of yours, they only spoil your day...

Dr Adrian recommended can have sexual activity 2/3 days after the dnc, as long as the bleeding stops. For us, we resumed sexual activity a few days after dnc. I guess physically it doesnt matter, (as long as bleeding has stopped)wat matters is how you feel about doing it again and are you ready mentally?

Technically speaking, women ovulate 2 weeks after the miscarriage. My cousin got pregnant immediately after her MC and never got any AF in between. She is now a mother of 3 healthy kids.
Most gynaes say can try right after but some of us prefer to wait at least 1 cycle for the womb and womb lining to recover. Some advocate waiting 3 - 6 mths for full recovery. Our TCM will recommend a year (that's wat he told me) But I guess it's also up to the individual how mentally prepared you are, coz to me, as long as after 1 cycle, if you think you are ready, there's nothing to stop you.
 
ceraine,
Yeah, i'm looking forward to the HK trip & 'whoohoo' time at nite
happy.gif


Your colleague is very insensitive ... Some will ask the wrong questions, some will assume that you are still pregnant. That's the thing i hate about going to work after my MC ends.

Actually today is the 1st day i'm resuming work. I was NOT looking forward to working as i'm afraid colleagues might start asking me what happened. I guess my boss had already told them before i came back, so i didn't encounter any awkward questions today. Thank goodness.

roxy,
Your bleeding after dnc stop so fast ..... mine dragged until abt 1.5 weeks b4 it completely cleared.
 
hi ceraine, could you get your ex-co to mail your testimonial over to you instead? then you won't have to make the awkward trip down to collect it in person. i hear your bleeding has started. please take care.

hi roxy, how are you feeling now? must continue to stay positive ok?
 
santorini,

I am not taking any antibiotics. Actually why were u on antibiotics ? Doc only gave me painkillers, that's all. This 2 days the passing motion is ok, no pain. Hope it goes away. tks for your concern.


ceraine,

sad to see u here, but we have to comfort ourselves that if bb is unhealthy/not developing normally it is better to let go now. I also just changed job! same as u...I even wonder how to break the news to my boss esp I am a contract staff, they may not renew my contract when I am on maternity leave. Now my fears are unfounded..tsk tsk..
I went to a TCM physician yesterday. She told me my mai4 (heartbeat at wrist) is very weak. She gave me those powdered TCM medicine to drink. She said i shd only start TTC'ing HALF A YEAR later, thats the norm for any miscarriage. I am disappointed to hear that, cos I am inching towards the big 35..but my gynea told me after the D&C that I can start trying 3 mths later, so I am not sure who to believe...
 
hi all,

I need some advise. I just went for my first gynae check up after my d&c which was done 3 weeks ago. My urine test came back postive for pregnancy still. My gynae took my blood test to check for hormones level and she said if my hormones level is still very high, i would need to take medication for 1yr and cannot try for baby within the year!

I am so worried. Have any of you heard of such a thing?

I was still planning to try for another baby soon.

The blood test result will be out 2 days later. This year very unlucky!
 
Dear stumbled_by and pegsfur, hang in there... this will pass and the good times will come.. have faith...

hi roxyz... stay calm and cool... dun be worried unnec... k? just think positive, and you will do just fine!

tatzbaby, I heard of a similar case previously, a friend of mine had a similar encounter, she later went to get a second opinion, and was told that she actually had etopic preg and needed to be operated on immed, she did not believe and refused and I think her blood went back to normal level after a while, cos i din hear her complain further. if u are not sure, pls seek a second opinion?

ceraine... u may want to ttc ONLY when u feel emotionally ready for it. give urself time... I started to hv intimacy about 4 weeks after the dnc, i didn;t feel quite comfortable with it initially, took me a while to get over the emotional block...

ONe qn that I really need your opinions, I just tested myself postitive last week, PLEASE DO NOT congratulate me yet!! due to the last incident, I am now a little more careful and discreet.. i hope u can understand...

I have booked my NZ trip, the air tkt, the accomdation and car rental, I am supposed to fly off on 30th Dec and be there for New Year;s Eve and spend my Birthday there, which is on 2nd Jan... I went for a check up at my gynae today, and the scan showed that mine is still at a very early stage, about 4-5 weeks, can't see very much yet. Given my age (39 and approaching 40) and my history of having to lose one in April this year, and a history with endiometrisis 4 yrs ago, my gynae strongly discourage me from going. Can everyone pls share your views, should i go, or should i cancel my trip of 14 days to NZ? is it safe to travel? I should be about 6-7 weeks by end of this month.. I can make the trip less strenuious by taking out all the trekking etc, but the gynae thinks that the driving will still stress me out, and in case of any emergency... cancellation would cost me about S$450.

I will discuss this with hubby in detail tonight when he gets home. but i wana hear from u gals too... a part of me really wana go for the trip, this is our honeymoon trip that we hv been planning, but a bigger part of me wants everything to be alright... pls pls share with me your views.

also, during 1st trimester can drink DOM? Dom is still alcohol right? i drank some at about 2 weeks ago as I did not know yet, is it ok? will it do any harm?

thanks in advance, gals..
 
Hi Irene,

Glad to hear the wonderful news - am so envious. :eek:)

Driving in NZ can be stressful, especially if you are the only driver. The distances are long, and roads are narrow & winding. You may decide to spend time in 2-3 towns/cities instead of driving around the country. That way, it'll be a lot more relaxing.

I'm going to the US next week until mid-Jan. If I'm fortunate enough to be pregnant, we'll still be going ahead with the travel plans, including going on the more sedate rides in Disneyland with my son. However, if you are really worried, it would be better to postpone your trip until the 2nd trimester. April is a fantastic time to see NZ. The autumn colours are just beautiful.

If you have already booked and paid for your domestic tickets and car rental, ring the airline and car rental company to explain your situation. They are usually very compassionate and will allow you to change your itinerary without penalty.
 
tazbaby,

If you are still tested positive for pregnancy when you are obviously not, you might be having molar pregnancy. This is a case where there are no foetus in the sac but the cells kept on multiplying. The reason why your gynae said you can't have baby for a year is because it is another form of cancer. However, you will be cured 100% if you take the medication as instructed.

But then again, dun be too scared cos i encountered the same thing as you when i had my 1st dnc last year. My hcg level was high too after dnc and my gynae mentioned the same thing to me. But after a few weeks of monitoring, my hcg level finally went low and i was cleared. So i guess you cld give yourself some time for the hcg to go down before scaring yourself.
happy.gif
 
irene,

I wouldn't go if i were you cos we all know that the 1st trimester is the most vulnerable period. But if you really wanna go, how abt postponing it till the 2nd trimester? I know of a friend who still went to France in her 7th mth and nothing happened to her.

But then again, when i went to the GP to confirm my pregnancy the previous time, she told me that dun worry too much and do things as i would normally do. If the bb is strong, even if you fall down or kena any trauma, the bb will still be with you. I find it kind of true.
 
Hi Irene

I wont go if i were you... cos is too previous for me compare to the trip. I am sure you can go again later...

I booked my holiday too b4 i tested +ve... but i cancelled the trip as i nvr know wat will happen.. if anything happened, i will regret and blame myself.
 
hi pegsfur,

My gynae did mention molar pregnancy to me but she refused to elaborate coz she want to wait for my hormones result to come out first.

I heard from my friends its cancer too.

I was so scared i bought another pregnancy test kit - clear blue to try at home. but i was tested negative. i am really praying very hard that its not molar preg.

thanks for ur encouragment!
 
tazbaby,

Same here ... my gynae also didn't want to eleborate on the molar pregnancy when I asked her abt it. She said she didn't want to put us to unneccesary scare without first knowing the results. Is your gynae from Raffles hospital?
happy.gif


Since you've tested yourself and it's negative, I think you shldn't worry too much lah. I guess it just takes a longer time for the hcg level to go down in your case.
 
Hi roxy,

Ur Bleeding stop very fast. I am still having bleeding
sad.gif


Hi Tazbaby, pegsfur,
Is it a norm to have a blood test after the D&C to certify that our HCG has retain to normal level ? As i did not have any blood test done and i am still having bleeding for nearly a month.

I dont have the sympton of infectious such as high temp, but my basal temp is rather on the high side.
 
Hi ladies,

I am new to this thread and would like to hear some advice(as I can't share with my friends as they do not have the same experience). To share with you all on my experience:
I was 22.5 weeks pregnant (1st pregnancy) before the membranes ruptured (with no contractions). The doc advised me to terminate, which I did. In my case, the reason was unknown - tested no virus infection. I had resigned to concentrate on my pregnancy before I actually conceived. No housework for me at all, control my diet by taking the healthy food but such a thing actually happened. Could someone advise me what could be the possible reason as I can't find any acceptable reason in the internet??? Could it be rhinitis (blocked nose) - Anyone with similar case?

My gynae was from Thomson but I had the termination done in SGH as I am really disappointed with the gynae in Thomson and really impressed with the docs/nurses in SGH . Going forward, I am pondering between Dr John Tee from KKH (never seen him b4 but heard that he is good) or Dr Tan LK/Tan HK from SGH to perform any possible tests. Any advise?

Hi Angela Tan,
Can I check with you - I understand you had I cervix, how come the docs didn't discover it in ur 1st pregnancy? How are u now and how many weeks are u now? Hope u can tell me a little more abt the cerclage and any medication needed?

Hi Patsy,
Can I check with you - if I am not wrong, I read in one of the threads that you delivered in wk 19 and managed to cuddle your bb. Is your bb breathing on his own or using the machines as mine is not breathing (i think) at wk 22.5 wks. Sometimes, I wonder if I should deliver the bb and see if he can survive rather than terminate the pregnancy.
 
Hi Irene,
I agree w Angela,dun risk the trip tho it is a trip both u n hubby really wanna go.Unless your gynae gave you the green light or else dun take the risk.The little one inside u is very precious.
My gf was given the green light to travel even at the 8th mth of her pregnancy whereas for me,the same gynae told me i can forget abt travelling for the next 9mths when i was newly pregnant.So it really depends on ur health condition.
Wat i suggest you get a letter from your gynae to certify your pregnancy n state you are not safe to travel and email to the relevant parties.
Abt the DOM,since you have already drank it,dun worry abt it...tat is wat gynae told us..wat has been past,u cannot control so just make sure u be careful in future.

Hi Tazbaby,
Dun worry first oki..let us know after th results are out tom..meanwhile,take great care ok?

Hi Angela,
So sorry to read abt ur case..i can understand what u wan now are answers to alot of questions..jus remember to take good care of yourself ok?
 
Irene,
yes, i agree with the rest. do not take the risk, esp your gynae has not given the green light. call your agency to see if you could transfer or postphone the trip.

everything will turn out fine for you, don't worrie.

Pegsfur, xuanting,
nope , i didnt collect my stuffs from ex-co. the pain was excruciating. took rest at home instead.

i had qualms about BDing when i saw red, as it really reminds me BD = loss of the BB.
anyway, i am still bleeding now, not sure when it might stop

ladies,
anyone go thru natual "abortion/miscarriage" as in natural flushing out?
do you encounter more than menstral cramp pain? its like pulling or twitching pain on standing for 5mins etc.
even a taxi ride is challenging as its painful??

i am trying to "bu" now,but seems to be coming down with flu and sorethroat.oh my god!!!!

brought forward my tmc bloodtest and gynae checkup from sat to tmr, as nurse worried of the pain.

Stumbled by,
did you do a mini confinement?
TCM usually would play safe and try to tiao your body for few months before they give green light.
as long your wall lining is thick,menses regular, i guess u can start trying on 2nd month?
 
Hello Grace

My 1st MC is like yr case but my membranes ruptured at week 17 wz contraction. Couldnt find the casue of it also but as said by many might be infection. As there is no water left, i have to induce the baby.

As for my 2nd MC, my cervix dilated at week 19 without any sympton. I only feel more discharge and when for a check, then realise i am 6cm dilated. No contraction, nothing. By the time i am rush to NUH, i am fully dilated. Managed to did an emergency cerclage, stayed in NUH for 2weeks... but one day when i was trying to poo, my membranes squeezed out between the stiches and almost visual from my V area... The doctor have no choice but to cut the stitches as they dosen want to damage my cervix. During the process, my waterbag bursted. They induced me the very day and i was 21 weeks then.

There are a lots of "why" in my head. As you said, my gynae should have realise after my 1st MC... but too bad she did not. I dun blame her as sometimes thing happened for a reason. So only after my 2nd MC Prof Biswas from NUH confirmed tat i have cervical incompentant.

After my 2nd MC in June, I was given green light by 2 gynae to start trying after my 1st AF as i was recovering well and also i dint reali want to wait... so i strike after my 1st AF this time. When i am at week 12, i undergo a cerclage ops as chances of success is over 80% if i do it before anything happen. As my cerclage this time is planned, after the ops, i stayed in the hospital for 4days when all is ok and bleeding stopped. After tat was given anti-biotic, and some others medicatin to keep m womb quiet and reduce the water in my waterbag. But tat were all taken for 2weeks only. Apparently after the ops.... we can be like normal ppl, working etc just tat dun squad and carry heavy stuffs. But i reali dint wan to take the risk again so i quit my job and rest at home. I am currently into my 20 weeks now. Only thing i have to take note is i cannot have fever, if i have fever i have to admit immediately as worry of infection due to the stitches in my body. Afterall the stitches is not part of my body tissues.

My road ahead is not easy but i have to stay positive. I have already did wat i have to, so now i just have to have faith, be postive and look forward. In toal i actully have 3 MC, but 1st wan is at a very early stage... so is consider chemical MC... Is reali not easy as i gave birth to 2 babies (1 boy, 1 girl)... just ahve to tell myself the time is not right then.

Have faith my dear.. you will make it and dun let wat happened before haunt you. Maybe is beta to let go of the "why" and start again. People around me always think i am very strong as i nvr give up trying even after so much i have being thru... guess that is something in life i want so much and i am not willing to give up. So no matter how hard the path is, i will want to try again unless some1 tell me says... I cant and there is not solution to my problem. So dun give up okie...

If you need someone to talk to, you give me a buzz... 98470954.

Cheers.
 
ceraine,

I know someone who has natural miscarriage. It just happen suddenly. But she did experienced abit a crammpy pain. But it all depend individually.

The weather lately is very bad. I am having flu and sore throat too. Not sure if this is because of the chinese herb i am taking. But i think all PU should take moderate.

Stephanie
I am sorry for your loss. Please take care of yourself. I know it is hard and tough. I forced myself to take confinement meal in order to nurse my health back.

2. My gynae did not mention the heartbeat count to me too. But i think most of doc wont mention unless u actually asked them.
3. I am still bleeding for nearly one month after my D&C.
4. Some of the ladies goes to Bukit Batok
7. I did most of my test in NUH. I need to be tested constantly on my hormone level when i was preg.

Hope these help.
 
Hi Gals,

I have been visiting this site since I discovered my pregnancy to get advice on childcare options and ideas about where to buy maternity clothes. However, today, I am visiting to mark the ending of a most important and meaningful phase of a woman's life. I did a D&C on 10 Dec after finding out I had a missed miscarriage on 7 Dec (10 weeks 2 days). After hearing the heartbeat and seeing the little cute body on ultrasound at 7 weeks 1 day, my baby's heartbeat stopped at 7 weeks 3 days. I believe I do not have to describe the feelings of how my (our) heart(s) broke into unmendable pieces after knowing it (denial at first) and accepting the death. All the mothers in this thread would have felt and is still feeling the same emotions. I believe each one of us here have a slightly different story but the maternal feeling is so universal. We could have traded our own lives for our babies to live one more time but nothing can be changed. Since the day of my D&C, I only knew one thing and that is tears. I feel an ending pain for not being able to hold my child, feed my child and protect my child. The statement "I Never Held You" (also title of book by Ellen Dubois about miscarriage and stillborn) is short but describes exactly how a mother who lost a baby during miscarriage, stillborn feels. My hubby and I had created a little birthcert and a little tombstone that contains our baby's ultrasound photo to at least tell our baby that we will always remember him/her because our child will only have our love in his/her little lifetime. We also bought our baby a small bear and will be buying small toys on his/her conception/death anniversary to make up what our baby lost (not that it can really make up for anything, that is why I am crying everyday). I miss my baby terribly and hope that one day, I can still be his/her mum again. And this is also the first time that I saw my hubby cried in more than 7 years of knowing him.

I have not been eating confinement food and taking care of myself due to the grief but my common sense tells me I should? I am not sure if I should have another baby but again, my inner voice tells me I should since I would (we would all) be a great and responsible mum (s). I have a few questions to ask you gals if you do know the answers:
1. Do you have any good gynaes to recommend, especially someone who has consulted mums with prior miscarriage before?
2. Did your previous gynae tell how fast your baby's heartbeat is? When I saw my baby's heartbeat in 7weeks plus and asked him how fast it was, he said the heartbeat rate is unimportant. If you gynae told you, can you tell me who your gynae is as I might want to change gynae?
3. Is anyone still bleeding after 1.5 weeks with on off bleeding?
4. Are there any good TMC clinics to recommend for taking care of after effects of miscarriage.
5. Is it true that our menstrual cycles will never return back to normal length of 27/28 days after a miscarriage?
6. Can anyone advise where (what website) to buy ovulation test strips as those sold in Watsons are very expensive. (I am turning 32 soon and do not have the luxury of trying based on luck).
7. Finally, where I can I test for my hormonal levels (progeterone), at any gynaes or fertility clinic? Becoz my current gynae is very passive about such tests. I have to read from internet to educate myself.

Thanks very much for listening. I hope that everyone of us here will have luck to hold our babies in our arms one day and rock them to sleep. After reading many of your stories, I burst out into tears because I know, I really know how you gals feel. And I am sorry for your losses, truly sorry. I know deep down that having another baby will not save me (us) from the heartache of losing our babies as every baby lost is an individual that deserved to be loved in his/her own ways.

I am back to work but am so afraid that people just pop by my desk because I am crying all the time. And I believe all the mums here are the same.
 
Hi Ximi,

Many thanks for your answers, yes, they will help me. And I found recipe for the red date drink which I am going to boil tonite.
 
ceraine

i din really do a mini confinement. only took some general herbs for certain dinner meals(not everyday). Other than that, i still bathe, still drink eat as per normal. Only one week after D&C then I went to TCM to have proper chinese herbs. The chnese physician thinks my body is weak, thats why cant support pregnancy, and my mai4 is weak, so advise me to rest half a year leh..dunno..
Gynea said 3mths later... maybe after 3mths I let the chinese physician ba3mai4(take pulse) again..

rivernile,

2. Yes, previous(1st pregnancy) and current gynea(miscarriage preg gynea) said heartbeat for foetus is 150/minute. Or at least 120/minute. Mine(the miscarriage 1) was too slow, hence its too abnormal. By 7weeks plus definitely can see heartbeat. My current gynea is Dr CH Koh from Toa Payoh (think u can find him being discussed in this forum)

3. Not sure because I havent passed 1.5 weeks after D&C..but this few days is very little already, and not red.

4. Not sure but the current one I am seeing is MaKuang. Prior to my 1st pregnancy I went to Eu Yan Sang. Personally I find both are quite similar - at least proper standard in control.

6. I think in pharmacy/watsons they do sell one model that cost $150-200 which can be used 'permanently', not like those 50-70 bucks one where u can only use for 1 menses cycle. Don't worry, I am older than u :p If u do not have a child yet, u can try BBT method, at least it provides a rough gauge. Why I say u have a child now difficult cos BBT needs one to wake up about the same time everyday.

Hope u will get over your crying in office. I also cried non stop when in hospital, esp before the D&C..so much so when they were about to put GA on me, I was still....but thereafter I am resolved not to cry over 'split milk', because things cannot be reverted back...One got to move on...U can be strong and move on!
 
Hi Michelle, Thanks for your sharing, I was thinking about disclosing to them my situation too, hopefully the deposits can be waived, I wonder thats ever possible? But anyway I might wana jus try.

Pegsfur, Angela, Pj, Ceraine, Thanks for your advice and sharing I am not sure if my hubb can postpone the trip, cos his work is project basis, so it might be kinda hard to plan so far ahead. But I will probably check with him regarding this.

Hubb and I had talked about it Definitely we will have to cancel the trip, like most of you say, this is crucial time and I really should not take such risk. My sister and my good fren all say that I need not even think about whether I should cancel, but I should jus go ahead and CANCEL as they definitely would not think twice about cancelling.

My gynae will surely greatly discourage me from going, cos he has classified me as a high risk case, I know where I stand, I shouldnt push myself too far to the unknown Actually after making the decision, it was not so hard at all I felt fine about it

therefore, I will wait patiently till the next scan. God.. I m really very very anxious about this.. when I did the scan from the belly and nothing seemed to show up, I was sooooooooooooooooooo scared!! I was so worried and kept praying it was only when my gynae detected something thru the V scan, then I calm down abit

my gynae say i should do the nec tests earlier.. and that would be about CNY time... God, pls help me... i pray that this would be right.
 
Dear angela, u r doing well, keep the spirit up!! The glass is almost full, so rest, rest and more rest for u k?

Dear rivernile I am so sorry to hear about your loss
1.my gynae is the visiting consultant at KKH O&G, if you wan his contact, I can pass to you. He has delivered my sisters 2 kids via caecarian due to low plancenta, He also recommended suitable tests when he detected anything that draws his attention. I think he is experienced, so do let me know.

6. I recently bought the Ovulation strips and preg test strips online at $0.70 a stick, I have tried to use it, its quite decent u can find it here:
http://tiny-shop.blogspot.com/
http://sg.auctions.yahoo.com/sg/user/tinyshop_cal

I believe the pain may be unexplainable by words, I may be able to understand...I am going to mention the same thing again, My gynae said to me Look forward thats why our eyes are born to look forward, and dun look back. You may know you need to move on, yet the pain is still there, physically and emotionally. Grief what you need, and when u are ready, get up and start walking forward. Come in here whenever u need support, and thats wat we are all here for wish u well
 


Hi, rivernile,

sorry to hear abt your loss... I also got MC before when baby is 32th week... cos of placenta abruption... without any symptom... no bleeding & pain & 1 week before, gynae still said baby very healthy.

1.my gynae is Dr Ang... feels that he is good but also noticed lots a number of complains on him in the forum.during my 2nd pregnancy, Dr Ang is very careful when seeing me as told him abt my previous mc... then during my 36th week, noticed that baby not much movement & went to see him & CTG showed that baby heartbeat on high side... which means that baby may not be getting enough oxygen & he suggest that I should c-sect on that day as i cant predict what will happen in another 10 more days where my scheduled c-sect to be. Glad that I listen to him & now baby already 16 mths old. stop seeing my 1st lady gynae after my mc cos she not understanding enough lor cos after my mc, still ask me to sign package with her for my 2nd pregnancy & etc... never really explains the cause of my mc...

2.during every visit, doc will let me hear the baby heartbeat, & assure me that baby is healthy by the sound of the heartbeat.
 
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