Support group - Miscarriages

Hi AngelBee, i had my D&C last tues. I was told i was given jab when i was still under GA for painkillers. Nurse din mention anti-biotics. was prescribed anti-biotics & painkillers to bring home. Did you call the clinic to ask if the itch is normal?


JingleBun, dun think so much abt having a m/c again. we cannot control wats gg to happen. wat we can control is to make sure we prep our body for a healthy pregnancy. I have difficulty tinking abt a 2nd pregnancy. This loss kinda injected some phobias in me. All i can do is cry when i want, then let nature take its own course. I dun tink i wan to try for a bb so quickly. I know i am not yet ready. and for sure, my body is stil not strong enuf. First 2 days aft D&C was ok, then i went down to walk walk, do grocery shopping. Next 3 days ended in cramps n lots of bleeding. Now hv to recuperate all over...

It's not easy accepting what has happened, but life goes on. Rem to eat lots of nourishing foods then let nature take its own course, ok? LOVE YOURSELF!!!
 


angelbee,
it's best if you could go see (or phone) your gyane asap.
there's always a 'warning' when given anti-biotics (if there's any rash/itch, stop med. and see doctor) just to be sure it's not a reaction against the adjusting hormones.
take care
happy.gif
 
Hi icy..

Have u done D&C? If have big mass of retained tissue, I think a D&C should be done, but if some blood clots here n there, it should clear up within this week or at least at yr 1st menses.

Hi G,

Im sorry for wat u've been thru. If u havent done a D&C, u my want to see 2nd opinion, to confirm..n yes I've read of cases that heartbeat not detected, then few weeks time, gynae discover baby growing well. So its always wise to see 2nd opinion jus to be sure.

Hi angelbee,

My calculated guess is that the itch could be a yeast infection, caused by the anti-biotics given..u know why..cos I've read that anti-biotics kills both good n bad bacteria in the body, hence vagina gets dry then infection. Its actually quite common. Wat u can do is eat yoghurt..2-3cups a day..cos yoghurt has the bacteria culture to help fight infections. Some women even put the yoghurt down there..hehe..a bit gross..but it seems to work. But I think dont do that, cos u jus did D&C. I think its ok u leave it, unless gets really bad. I had it too after my m/c, but I didnt do D&C..it cleared up after a few days...n I jus ate lots of yoghurt.
 
jinglebun,
i also seen chinese sinseh after my D&C, he also say I can try again in 3 mths time. But i think i would prefer to wait longer like 1 yr before trying since it is my 2nd M/c within a period of 9 mths. Must also see if u are mentally to try again.

Charis,
Yeap, i done D& c yesterday. actually feel very giddy.. worse than my first. Wonder if that is becos my body had become a lot weaker. My bleeding had much stopped, i guess already nothing much inside after the natural m/c and D&C after that.
 
Hi icy..

Surgery is always not good on the body..it makes the body weaker..of cos some surgery cant be avoided. Its also cos of the GA given to u. Furthermore, after the natural m/c u had, u must have lost a lot of blood..then the D&C..so explains why u feel terrible physically..u should feel better after a few days of rest. But I know emotionally it may take a while. Hang on there.

Take herbs n tonics to strengthen n essence of chicken.
 
Hi Charis, Gd facts,

I cant take cold things now. I have to leave it first. Called the gyane, they is it's bcos of the anti-biotics.

If yoghurt dont put in fridge then eat will get spoil or not?
 
Angelbee..

U mean u cant eat cooling stuff? Ya yoghurt u have to put in the fridge..

Its ok..yoghurt is not that cold..furthermore the benefits outweighs the risk..the 'coolness' cant get to the womb..contrary to TCM belief.

Actually 'cool' or 'cold stuff' or anything in fact gets digested in the stomach..only the nutrients go to the blood stream..which then goes to whichever part needed by the body. If they say dont drink cold drinks cos it triggers asthma. then I believe..cos it makes more medical sense.

Anyway, this are my views. Everyone has diff. opinions.
 
Hello Gd Facts, Charis,

I did go to KKH yesterday to seek a second opinion from a Sen Consultant, same opinion, it was even worse at KKH, they can't even detect the baby, only the water bag and pregnancy yolk ...

Thanks for all the encouragement! I am feeling better today after a day of sobbing and grieving, my D&C will be thie coming Thursday ...
 
Charis, where did you read about the cases about the delayed detection of heartbeat? I will like to read more about that before my D&C on Thursday ... thanks!
 
preciousbaby,

hang in there...
do take care and allow yourself to grieve. important thing is now to recover.
 
hmm. .
Is it after still birth, the blood
which flood out is counted as our
regular menses? is this my 1st cycles?
I want to try for baby next month after
2nd menses..
is it ok? i start to take folic acid..
 
whats the difference between KKH and private hospital? is it the ultrasound systems better?
I dont know whether to go back KKH for my next pregnancy or go to thomson medicial.
But KKH got all my informations & medicial reports..
 
Charlene,
due to the advance of the 'preg' (3rd trimester) you actually "delivered" the baby... as such it's really advisable to recover fully first before trying again for a baby, as guideline is 3 menses cycle (appox. 3/4mths but b'cos body system is haywire due to hormonal changes... menses cycle is not regular).

during the "delivery", that bleeding is not at all considered as menses, it's part of the discharge of giving birth.
in average, after D&C, m/c, stillbirth, menses is expected to return/start 32-40 days later. (means if you had had your still birth last month july15, your 1st menses is expected by this week onwards there about).

yes, you are able to consume vits & folic now... it's part of buliding up your body system anyway.

everyone is egar to have a baby, especially after losing one... but really one must be ready in terms of health, mind and of course '$$' too lol !!
happy.gif


*touchwood* if you try now, when your body system is trying to recover... (there's alot of what ifs) something goes wrong or could cause complications... then how... ? [sorry not trying to scare you]
most of the moms here 'lost' their baby in 1st trimester, so their recovery is different and could try as early as after the 1st menses... but still some of them actually only try after their 3rd menses.

hospitals are hospitals, just a buliding. what's more important is the doctor. a gynae is someone one must be comfortable with and of course the senior the docs are the more their fees are too...
maybe now, as you're recovering, you could use the time to research for a doctor if you want to change... ask around family, friends or even the moms here or take your time, surf the the site, there's alot of (if not all) the gynaes' names here...
there are many types of machines... but again machines are machines, in s'pore i think most ultrasound system are updated but only selected hospitals have the 3D/4D ones and those cost alot... appox $300+ a session to scan and get pics.
if you want to change gynae/hospital, be prepared that you may not be able to have all your records... as such you need to explain and relate your still birth to the 'new doctor' and that may bring back saddness.

well, do take care and here's wishing you speedy recovery.
happy.gif
 
hey ladies ,

check with u all hor....i try the OPK last week....day 16 from 1st day of last mens = lighter test band than the control....then the next day CD 17 i try again, the test band looks darker than the previous one. When i try on CD18, it become lighter and CD19 which is today, totally no test band leh.....how come like that? does it mean that if the colour is darker gradually then u r going to O?? think prob i m not ovulating on these few days??
 
Charlene,
thought i share with you... last yr my cousin sis when she found out her baby died, she had afew test done. her doc took a few tubes of blood from her. next day, she went to see another doc for 2nd opinion just to confirm her lost... 2days later she went to the hospital and 'delivered' her baby... she did request as well as doc's advise to do a post mortem on the baby. and at 25wks her baby gal's caused of death was due to the umbilical cord. it seems the cord was 'defaulted' and there was no means at all of knowing from her & her doc (no ultrasound machine could detact)... as there were many knots of the veins in the cord and so there was very little blood flow going to the baby, and slowly the baby died in her womb.
the blood test she did was all good... meaning she was really healthy and her pregnancy was a smooth one too, but sadly she still lost her baby.
oh she tried for another baby 3 mths later and now is expecting another
happy.gif
 
thanks gd fact.

from the pics, i actually did O on CD17.....hmmm.....did ttc on CD14, 15 and 17. hope will have good news soon.
happy.gif
 
Hi Charlene,
You can give KKH a ring to check for retriving your records, you need to pay certain some of money.

I prefer to go private bcos the price for paying for a senior gyane in hospital and private is almost the same, waiting time in hospital is longer.

Some private gyane are very considerate towards patients pockets too..... What i know is that private gyane dont deliver in public hospital, correct me if i am wrong.
 
Hi charlene...

Gd facts gave u some good advice about TTC..U shouldnt do it so soon..at least 3 cycles.

My girlfriend's baby also died in the womb at 24 weeks..it was the cord too.. faulty cord..blood vessels were knotted, it cut off supply of blood, oxygen etc as the baby grew. It was something that happen rarely, n cant be detected.
Gynae told her to rest for 3-6 months before TTC again.
 
Gd facts,
i have some questions here.
1)a day before me and my Hb have sex, i had food poisoning and ate 2 tables of panadol and vomitting medicine. But after that, i have stopped the tablet. (on the day we have sex, i do not eat any med).May i know if i pregnant, will it b harm to my BB?
2) I drink DOM 2-3 times a week, may i know can pregnant women drink DOM?
3) As i was told u b4, i had visited chinese sinseh due to my back pain, i drink chinese med also, but i have informed the sinseh that i TTC now, she said shdn't b the problem, cause the chinese med that she gave me is to adjustment my body and period. But i still worried...
 
Hi piggymummy..

Answer to yr 1st qn is..most likely not. Cos medication effect is usually around 24 hours only. Furthermore, u took only once..so should be ok.
 
charis,
so sorry to hear about your galfriend's baby. i know my cousin sis had a tough time overcoming the period but she's ok eversince.
happy.gif


piggymummy,
errr... taking panadol at any time is ok. even when pregnant, it's ok to consume it. (of course not over dosing like taking more than 8 a day lah)
i should presume your food poisoning is mild right ? (you vomitted once only but were you having cramps and pain ?) b'cos the next day you had the "energy" to TTC/ML
happy.gif

i doubt there's any harm done... b'cos it's the "quality" of the "sperm & egg" to get you pregnant... as well as the right moment, if you are ovulating or not, etc...

as for TCM (chinese med), i'm unable to advise... b'cos i personally don't believe much on TCM. my knowledge on chinese herbs are only the common ones that's easy to understand and it's a known root/plant that has english names and usage.
TCM - "adjustment for body/period" what is it made of... and also is it a medical proven thing ? do you personally know someone who had that worked on the person ?

to me, "bu" means eat well nutritious food. lots of fish (omega/calcium), red meat (for blood/protein), green leafy veg (natural folic/vits/fiber) & fruits (vits/fiber)
[i don't even take liver, b'cos too much vitA is harmful... and how to know what is too much]
the extra "bu" like herb soups (chicken with dangui, or chicken with black beans or chicken with black dates or ginseng chicken) commonly known herbs i know these are for our well-being.

in general, pregnant women & alcohol DON'T go hand-in-hand.
when you drink, the alcohol quickly travels through your bloodstream to your baby. your baby may end up with higher levels of blood alcohol than you have.
it increases the risk of miscarriage and stillbirth. as little as one drink a day can increase the odds for low birth weight and raise your child's risk for problems with learning, speech, attention span, language, and hyperactivity. and some research has shown that expectant moms who have as little as one drink per week are more likely than nondrinkers to have children who later exhibit aggressive and delinquent behavior.
so here... NO DOM unless
used in cooking... but to cook you need to allow 5-8mins for the alcohol to evaporate.

when TTC it is important to start on floic and eat healthly.
i will personally stay away from chinese herb, but that's my choice
happy.gif


take care and good luck in TTC
 
gd facts,
thanks for giving me your advice.
you know alot huh? =)
Next time must ask you many questions..haha!
you're so helpful~
congrats to your cousin sis.. this time sure be a smooth one. How many weeks already her baby?
Charis,
thanks for ya concern =)
 
<blush>
charlene,
you very young
happy.gif
so have a lot to learn... me here 'old' mother of 1 (lol) liao..
happy.gif

from now on, must take care ok... cannot just think 'scare-scare' don't want to see doctor, don't want to let doc know what happened, etc...
you remember you once mentioned you bleed alot after ML with hubby when preg. do you know that it's really 'serious' lor... b'cos you could have internal bleeding inside of you and you don't know... you could just have lost alot of blood and get into shock or fits or even *touchwood* go into coma, etc... furthermore, you could have gotten an "infection" then as such it led to the m/c... (again not trying to scare you but all these are info, ok).
being preg is not totally 100% smooth/easy/safe, you know, even mothers-to-be (not just baby) lives can be in danger when preg, delivering &amp; after birth. there are things to take note of.

i have first aid knowledge and do read alot (and still am reading alot). my brother is a medical officer with the army and i love to read his books but not good enough in studies
sad.gif
last time...

spend your time going to the library and borrow books to read or surf the net. try to prepare yourself this time, so when the time comes, you know what to expect. being young if $$ is an issue, go to polyclinic and get the monthly (if can every 3 weeks better) check ups done there, then slowly by 3rd trimester get a good gynae, that way you will save $$...
feel free to ask as much questions, i don't mind
happy.gif
afterall we are all learning.

my cousin sis now still in 1st trimester... 2.5mths there about (i think).
take care and good luck
happy.gif
 
hi charlene/doggy,

dunno if we manage to ttc at the right time anot...cos one thing is i m not even sure if i really ovulate on that day and somemore if really O that day, dunno if the sperm catches the egg on time anot....haha......

no feeling leh...just that these 2 days gets hungry easily.....anyway my mens only due to come on 27th this month....so i wait n see ba......

not sure if u gals have the same thoughts as me.....after the m/c, i keep thinking what happen if i m/c the 2nd time round again......
 
gd facts,
ya, my mum told me also.. dont take things easy.
Must tell doctor what happen..
I'm just wondering is it because of i'm bleeding that time thats why my placenta got loss of blood. Next time cannot sex with hubby if i'm pregnant. lol!

ML means??
TTC means-->try for bb?
I really got so much more to learn. thanks gd facts!

Cheezel,
*TOUCHWOOD* !!! Think on the bright side, everything gonna be smooth okie?

If is me, i will also scare..
Dont give yourself too much stressed k?

I say you got a very very high chance preggie de.
Me also lei, 27th this month menses come.heex
waiting to hear your good news ya!
 
cheezel,
don't worry or even think about it, ok.. just relax and be happy
happy.gif

[as the saying goes, when you least expect things to happen, it'll happen] in this case it's for being positive lah...
after ML/TTC (make love / trying for baby), in general... a good/healthy swimmer sperm takes appox. 3 days to reach an egg (if you are ovulating then.. or within the 3 days you stand a good chance)
try http://www.babycenter.com/calculators/ovulation/
and see if the dates match.
fyi... but don't pin your hopes up and be stress over it... do take things easy and think happy thoughts
happy.gif
 
Hi G..

Im sorry I couldnt reply to u on time. I was at my parents' past 2 days..cant log on comp at all.

Anyway, I've read them from Medical Institute of America..I got the journal from a friend who brought it over from the US. I also read some cases on the internet..mainly from 'Christian sources'.

I guess u have done yr D &amp; C yesterday. So I dont think u should dwell on this 'cases' or 'probabilities' anymore. Jus concentrate on yr recovery, n take yr time to grieve if u need to. Hope yr next pregnancy will be smooth one.
 
hi gdfacts/charlene,

well, i try not to think abt it too much....but at times once in a while if i alone, this thing will somehow flash in my mind lo......

didnt pin my hopes high too....just let things happen naturally. you never know whats going to happen tomor so i try not to think too much now.......
happy.gif


i hope the preggie ladies here are doing well........
 
Hi good morning, I had m/c late May. Since then, I've been drinking tonic soup, eg ba zhen tang, longan drink etc. I also drink DOM every night except during menses. I feel that I feel warmer every night. I ask my hubby is he feeling warm? He always said no. Somehow I always feel hot and sweat. Do you think I ate too much tonic? Trying to bu cos wanna try next month. Thanks and have a nice day.
 
jinglebun...
you don't take those 'bu' stuffs daily right ? maybe you should 'bu' once (or max) twice a week, since it's alomost 3 mths already.
DOM will give an overall warm effect and quite immediatly can feel but sweaty... no leh...

but anyway, the day before you start TTC, best to stop all 'bu' stuffs &amp; DOM too. just eat normal healthy food. thereafter 5-6wks later if no mense appear you can do a preg.test .
don't forget upon conception... must eat properly &amp; healthy.
good luck
 
gdfact,

how come when ttc, better to stop all teh "bu" stuff?? I remember i still take "bai fong wan" n "bu yao jing" when ttc that few days....

Charis,
me ok.....mens due on 27th.....so waiting.....hehe
 
cheezel,
'bu' stuff can be rather 'heaty', to me personally, if one eats well... one is healthy. then it's a balanced. don't want to risk eating 'wrong stuffs' to cause complication *touchwood*.
like i mentioned above, tcm rather 'chiem' to understand... what if certain 'herb' clash with the food you eat or drink ? what are the ingredients ?
eat well is the best deal here lor... afterall, most 1st trimester mums do avoid tcm herbs till they are into the 2nd trimester... even birnest's even though it's medicially proven it serves no 'nourish', mums do start only after 3mths...
whatever it is, it's all just a guide of one's well-being.
happy.gif
 
gdfact,
thanks for the advise.....ya lo....tat time 1st trimester also no take herbs.......but still m/c...haiz.....anyway i do agree not to take too much of those herbie stuff ......dunno how it will affect pregnancy
 
cheezel,
just know that m/c is no body's fault... no one casued of it, no one wanted it.
some ladies i know, try and try to even get preg. also cannot... they are healthy and yet they can't be mums... i personally think they are having a 'tougher' time.
take care, ok
happy.gif
and think positive.
 
Gd facts,I agree with you. m/c is nobody's fault. When I had my m/c, some horrible people around me ask, "why you so careless? you didn't eat properly is it?" Makes me very upset. My husband said don't bother about them. So now I try to be positive.
Everybody take care and be happy...... : )
 
Junglebun,

Do take care. It true that close family support was most important at time like this. After my m/c my hubby, family and mother-in-law was super supportive. They keep telling me that it not my fault but merely that Bb don't have fate with the family. Perhaps they witness how I really broke down in front of them. they kept telling me that the next one will be the most perfect gift for us.

Rather it was more of friends tt commented, you should have taken more extra care since you know you are pregnant.

Such, kinship is most important and my relationship with hubby is so much much stronger than ever.
 
a close friend just had miscarriage yesterday.. i would like to do something to lessen her sadness and bring some tonic or chinese herbs to boost her health.. i m visiting her this afternoon.. please advice anything..thanks!
 
mum-wanabe,
sorry to hear about your friend's m/c... do hope she'll cope... in time.
getting her books on m/c would help alot, fruits, DOM or even fresh fish (for cooking) for her meals are good gifts too
happy.gif


oh... here's some useful notes that i chanced upon which is useful;
quote:
Miscarriage rates are often said to be about one in every five pregnancies. This means that we will all know someone who has experienced a miscarriage in our lives. In trying to be helpful and caring we often find ourselves saying things that we think would make the person feel better, but in fact, makes them feels worse...

Never say these phrases:

"You can always have another."
They don't want another baby, they want this baby.

"Now you have an angel looking after you."
They don't want an angel, they want their baby back.

"It's for the best."
Best for whom?

"At least you didn't know your baby."
Whether you held your baby in your arms or only in your mind, this baby is real.

"There must have been something wrong..."
Wrong with me?

"Did you do something you weren't supposed to do?
Did I cause this? How could I have hurt my baby?

"I understand how you feel."
Even if you have had a miscarriage, every one feels their grief uniquely.

"Have you ever thought of not having children?"
Yes, I probably have.
I realize that I may never be a mother.

"Be grateful for the children you have..."
It isn't a question of being ungrateful or not appreciating what I have.

Things to say:

"I'm sorry."
"What can I do to help?"
"I'm here for you."
Remember to take your time and be kind and gentle with your friend or relative. Every one has their own grieving ways and time frame. Don't expect them to "get over it."
Just be there and offer a shoulder and a comforting hug.
un-quote
 


Hi Ladies,

my mens due today but yet to come.....dunno if its becos the cycle go haywire after the DC. this is my 2nd cycle......at times will have a strong feeling that the mens will come anything at the abdomen there....then just these few days, i experience some short crampy feeling (on n off)at diff part of the abdomen. u ladies experience b4??
 
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