Dear mummies
thank you for leaving me your kind thoughts and regards even though I cannot post so often these past few days. So much has happened - Friday midnight, went into contractions, sent to Delivery Suite but thankfully, the pain subsided and baby Ashley's was obedient to still stay inside. Yesterday went for scan at 4pm, showed that my cervical length has shortened and so Dr Loh ordered for me to start my steroid jabs
1st dose was at 6.30pm - I knew it's going to be unpleasant but boy, it was even more stinging than all the IVF jabs put together. The moment the steroids entered my bloodstream, all the blood vessels and veins in my thighs went into involuntary convulsion and the pain only subsided about 30mins later...
but like what Costa advised - just grit my teeth and 'loon'...I tell myself - the more pain and jabs I take now, the less bb Ashley has to suffer in future...that very thought gives me strength to go through...anyway, y'day morning I had blood test too (twice a week) and it never fails to leave a large bruise on my arms...all these 'battle scars' for bearing a child!
This morning, as I was reading your posts, the neo-natologist Dr Agarwal (an Indian lady) came to talk to me ant all the complications that Ashley may face should she 'pop' btw now and before 28 weeks - all horror stories lah - listening to her nearly made me tear! Most eminent threats are undeveloped lungs, brain haemorrage, collapse of heart, liver/gut/intestine rupture etc. And also celebral palsy and low IQ...she also said once the baby's born, I won't be able to cuddle her as she has to be immediately resusitated (our instruction to the docs - to save her at all costs)...she has to be intubated and put on ventilator and IV drips etc.
I know all these must sound so familar and dejavu to you mummies who have gone down the same preemies road...thinking abt all the medical interventions our preemies have to endure just make my heart ache..If only God would spare us this agonising journey to Motherhood...mummies, I really need you to give me hope to see the light at the end of the tunnel...sometimes, it's so difficult to keep your hopes up when everything at this stage is still so unpredictable...Still, to have made it to the start of week24 is a victory in itself already and I'm so thankful to feel Ashley move inside me everyday...looks like I'll be hospitalised here at KKH till Ashley's delivered so keep your posts coming ya? Hugs and thanks.