Premature babies support group

[daec]

kkf
I am also still upset abt preggy/birth not normal/breastfeed like others. Nada bd coming soon so some bad feelings coming up coupld with the bad feelings abt my hse not settled which means I cant quit job yet. I keep help family yet dunno why I get all this bad stuff.I also believe strongly first few years esp impt to take care of e babes. keep being upset,depressed,angry abt all this.

Anywayz as my hubby remind me ( which I need constantly coz I still get upset) - we are lucky that we still have our kids, no matter how we had them. some do not have babies at all.

Dash is healthy now and growing strong. Take pride and comfort in that.

#2 ? I'm scared and upset abt it too. Just have to hope and let it happen naturally. In those areas where possible and try to be pro-active as we can, like what u did with seeing Dr Ann Tan.

It occurs to me that rite now - actually we need to let ourself heal emotionally too. heal the negative, angry etc.. Not gd to let it keep inside. Some pp say these angry feelings mite lead to more health issues. Someone suggest hynotherapy to me. dunno if it works.

Somehow kkf, we have to let of the upset and live with hope

 

[daec]

didi/xbliss
actually I also dunno how I am going to be SAHM hehe. dun like cleaning, staying home too long. Its just that i believe v impt take care of e kids myself as grandparents tend to pamper whereas maids cant disipline kids. I also want to provide home cooked food, be by my girl's side in everything.

 

[daec]

kkf
heard some pp believe that the more angry u are with self, and ur fate - its harder for things to get resolved and move along. Perhaps need to resolve that first before second one comes.

 

[didi]

xbliss, daec,
I am and was never a good sahm, can't do housework and cooking was never my forte

b4 the boys arrived, majority of my housework was done by my hb, I only clean up the master bedroom, don't cook at all, just eat out or order tingkat

now still the same, but with a helper, at least we can have home-cooked meals and a reasonably tidy house. As for feeding Bryan, believe it is just a phase, over the phase it will be better

and he will be a hungry baby again

 

[bloom75]

daec, hahha.a... stressful industry.. i am a system analyst ... if change line duno where to go..cos co might just treat me as fresh grad and pay me $1.8k?

dm.ahhaa..nowadays alot of foodcourt comes with alot of sauce and salt..so now can only feed her white rice bland bland... oh yeah..forget u work in nestle... ehehe... ask them to come out with nan ha3 quick then i switch back

jane, o i c... kate also rub her eyes sometimes... strange...

didi, ur 'salary' is bbsitter x 2 (mkt rate = $600 for weekdays only, so its $1200 liao) + cook (assuming $2 pax per meal?) + cleaner (min $10/hr) ...ehehehe... maybe bring the kids club med? got break plus lots of activities for the kids...

daec, ehehhe.. fate leh... yishun safra is near my pl... but i also email them asking what do they need if we organise outside and if we can bring the kid along... if we cannot organise among ourselves then i will go for the june safra one...

xbliss, anything is possible hor... cos ovulation kick start liao

kkf, is adoption an option? or a tiger/rabbit bb? i know how sad it is when guanyin said no... dont hate urself... actually i wonder if i ask guanyin which is a good yr for me to give birth how will she answer me thru a qian???

 

[daec]

bloom
if change line,I think depends on the line and ur fate. for sure, salary cut. but how low is another question. shld not be fresh grad pay la. IT pay is not that wonderful as it used to be. Other lines are paying well too.

u raise gd point abt how answer thru qian.

didi
so gd got helper! for sure hubby wont provide me helper, expected to do all myself if SAHM. argh. yup kids can take up all time, hard find time to clean/cook.

 

[didi]

Bloom,
ok lah, I get a meagre 'salary' from hb (cause don't cook, other than for my boys, don't clean), but hey I also get performance and year-end bonus too, ha...ha Club Med, already thot of that, but my boys are too young to enjoy, maybe when they are about 3-4 yos.

daec,
I need a helper cause 2 bum bum, but if I only have 1 then maybe different story liao

my gfs are luckier, they are sahm with 1 kid and the hb still employ a helper for them, so they are so 'switch-off' and well-groomed most of the times ..... you sure can cope, you can cook those 1-dish meal, put everything and stew etc, as for cleaning, clean over the weekends with hb's help lor

things will sure work out well.

 

[disneymickey]

yeh yeh..juz confirm my trip..to penang.. no more bali or krabi cos using miles frm hubby.. but penang oso better than nothing la..now gg 2 apply leave & bk hotel

 

[costa]

Harlo, mummies,
just to update you on fairylander...she texted me during lunch just now tt cathrina had gone for surgery at 12 plus and it wld take about 5 hrs..

lets hope tt she will be okay and will update again on monday when i have news as my home laptop is down

 

[didi]

Costa,
thanks for the update

enjoy your weekend

 

[tree_ice]

Hi fairylander,

Know that u will be bz taking care of little catherina now.. But I m sure she will recover very fast and very well too.. She is a very pretty baby..

Soon it will be my turn for Craydon's surgery.. When the time come, hope u can enlighten me what to expect during the hospital stay k?

 

[kkf]

thanks for all your encouragements and concern.

Maybe you all are right, thanks for all your advices. I shd let nature takes its course. Maybe I shd wait till dash is 3 years old, then consider. Maybe that will be the right time for me.

Hope cathrina recovers fast.

Powergal, why craydon needs surgery.

 

[didi]

DM,
Good leh, to go Penang, hmm we also thot of gg there cause my dad's hometown, heard that the shopping there has improved

tell me more about it when you return

hopefully can arrange for a family trip next year with my parents and sis's family

 

[tree_ice]

kkf,

My son was diagnosed with hypospadias.. Need op to correct the urine opening..

 

[xbliss]

fairylander,
i am sure the op was a real success. do take good care of urself and cathrina.

powergal,
think almost all of our bbies here have gone through some kind of surgery. it's so common yet so scary when u have to go through it. my bryan just went through the 1-hr hernia surgery in feb just before cny. he has two 1-cm slits on each side of his groin, just below the stomach fold.

 

[kkf]

bloom, you know wat, I did consider adoption. I am thinking if I am really not fated to have another, I will adopt.

silly me right?

anyway, have fun today at pasir ris kids kampong. recommended to all.

it was a great place for children, i think. at least they can feed the fishes or use the net to catch fishes.

updated in dash website www.ido.per.sg/dash

 

[kkf]

Powergal...when your boy needs to go for operation?

Dash had heart surgery before. It was a one week stay in children ICU. if you need to know anything, you can also ask me.

didi, we share similarities. I also am not a good housewife. Most of the household chores are done by my hubby and the part time cleaner. me very lazy.

dm so good going penang? I am only planning go sentosa...hee.

I think you all are right, if the child is fated to be mine, he/she will be. I can only wait. Waiting is what I don't like as I am a super impatient person frankly. sigh...but for the sake of myself and my future child, think I better wait. I thought I can go on no pay soon, but seems like maybe next year.

 

[didi]

kkf,
good leh, now I got kaki liao

 

[tree_ice]

hi xbliss and kkf,

I still dun know the date for the op yet but most likely will be postpone.. This Aug will be a 2nd review to see if he is suitable for the op..

Anyway if bb stay in normal C class ward, can the parent stay in with them? Can rite? Must bring own milk powder and diaper?

 

[kkf]

powergal

if normal c ward, only one parent is allowed to stay. the other one can sleep outside.

There is milk and diaper provided, you just tell the nurse what milk your boy drinks, and she will make for you. But I find it troublesome, cause got to go trouble the nurses, and sometimes, may take a while...

diapers need to pay. They have only drypers.

 

[kkf]

alternatively, you can stay in the women's tower macdonald family room, so that you n your hubby can rotate to take care of your boy.

 

[didi]

powergal,
For normal C ward, they will provide u a fold-up bed for someone to stay with the bb, iirc.

 

[xbliss]

powergal,

dun tink craydon's op is so soon right? becos bryan was premie, he had to go to high dependency ward after his op, as docs wanted to monitor him closely. he had his op at 4mths/1mth corrected age. for high dependency, also only 1 caregiver can stay and max 2 visitors, same rules as NICU. very expensive unless u are subsidized.

i am down for another 2 days MC.. been seeing doc three times in 2 weeks as the illness just keep getting worse. everywhere i go pple cough and sneeze and it's not helping. sigh. very sad to be sick cos scared pass to bryan.

 

[kkf]

weather not too good, so people keep falling sick. do take care.

Now, my school has quite a few cases of hand foot mouth disease also, me also worry everyday.

Waking up early to do my assignment...sigh...I hate it!

 

[kkf]

Btw, just went for the 2nd session of marriage course. I finally know why I buy and buy for dash, cause thats the way I express love. haha. The instructor said we have five languages of love. Giving gifts is one of them. So my language of love is giving gift.

I will tend to buy things for my hubby and son. So...my language of love is very expensive!!!

Five languages of love:
1. Words of affirmation
2. Quality Time
3. Receiving gifts
4. Physical Touch
5. Acts of service

Important to know whats your and your partner language of love, cause else if you do a lot but thats not his language of love, he will still feel unloved, and vice versa.

 

[xbliss]

wah, kkf, now u sound like marriage counsellor! hehe. thanks for sharing info wor. we no need to go course still can benefit. Agree wholeheartedly about your love language. can se from dash website.. heheh.. all the mac's, toys, books, etc!

 

[neoah]

good morning mummies

finally when qian hu last satureday..hehe

powergal, yes for C ward (and B2 ward) they will provide a fold up bed. only one parents can stay with the baby (at night). and they give baby cot..

wow today i have afternoon appointment with the SGH ENT therapist. time to report siang progress...

kkf - language of love. that is interesting...i think my lao gong is peace and quiet

hope everything ok for fairylander

 

[bloom75]

daec, hahaha..my fate not very good... other lines that are paying well either need alot of talking skills (sales) or need a cert

kkf, not silly lah..there are alot of kids out there in need of a good home..so what if they are biologically urs? fyi, i wanted to consider adoption too, but hb said try first... (ahh..he is not the one with pre-eclampsia)... wah..confirm my hb's act of love is acts of service, he always want me to do things for him! mine is all 1-5!!! ahahaha..interesting course!

btw, mommies, the pp from the meridian place called me... the course for kids is more for 4-12 yo, but they said < 4 yo can bring too, but afraid the kid will not stay still (ahahah.. for 1, my bb will not).. they encourage the kids to come along..bring yoga mat.. if wana organise own class, min 10 adults, bring ur own yoga mat and towel, need a room big enuf for the kids to lie down cos got hands on..and they will bring their own projector... cost is $20/pax. can also go to their workshop at clementi for the course .. hehehe. i was thinking if there is enuf pp interested, maybe we go rent a condo function room then even if the kids run around we won't feel embarassed.... must go and see if cc offer such courses too...

btw, mommies, i know that books/etc said that kids tend to fall sick more easily after they turn 6 months old cos they are developing their own immunity. but does urs turn more sick after 6 months old/1yo? cos mine is more sickly since > 1yo (this yr see doc duno how many times liao)..i am wondering if its bcos i change the fm... maybe should change back to partial nan 2 HA...sighhhh

 

[disneymickey]

kkf,
u go learn then teach us 4 free heehee.. tat's ur way of loving us

aiya, sentosa oso got sentosa kind of fun mah.. i juz need a break &amp; hubby got miles to burn..

anyway, gd tat u hav 想通了..enjoy ur bonding w dash &amp; relationship w hubby

 

[neoah]

xbliss
take care ah...taking care of bb does worn us down. find time to rest (if can..)

bloom
for my boy..yeah it seem after 6 months he start to go down with flu etc.. (from the date of birth till now he hospitalised for 3 times due to wheezing mostly)...i really scare liao...

disneymickey,
you are right. taking a break with our family (no matter what is the distance) is fun

)

 

[daec]

bloom
I'm not gd at those either.I'm sort like the breadwinner somemore.

scared the pre-enclampsia too. there is a chance it wont happen again too.

kkf
thx for those tips. me &amp; hubby v diff indeed. I thnk I am 2. Quality Time. 3. Receiving gifts. Whereas hubby is 1.words of affirmation and 5.acts of service - Keep asking me to do stuff for him.

didi
Wah 2 not easy to manage

 

[disneymickey]

can i ask which 1 of u mommies has brought ur kid 2 bb gym sort of thing? got recommendations?

 

[didi]

daec,
intially is TOUGH

but my mom was staying with me for the 1st 6 months, so at least not so bad. But I have to give credit to my hb, he helps out a lot, he is able to take care the 2 bums (b4 me gtg a maid and on weekends where my mom return home) and I can still make a trip to town off and on, and I would say he is better at babycare than me, malu malu

 

[daec]

didi
Good for u!

 

[costa]

disneymickey,
harlo, i hvnt brot my son for those gym thingy..although i m vy keen, was too busy as nows the exam period for my elder son..

rgdg the gym thingy..maybe you can try those jwt, my gym etc...go for trial lesson or join other mummies wif kids abt ws's age and see if suitable or not

you noe the new big splash...they have a kids gym there where you pay as you pay..if i m not wrong its about $18 for two hrs on wkdays and $18 per hr for wkend....tink a parent must accompany the kid..if one of you goes wif ws..the other parent can hv a drink or try other activities within big splash...can consider..to see if she likes such gym play...got webbie on tis..www.bigsplash.com.sg

the gym thingy is called some frisk romp or smthg..cant rem the exact name..

 

[disneymickey]

thanks costa. actually it's 4 my colleague. me not keen leh..think bring ws down to playground 2 do her own exercises haha

 

[didi]

daec,

Costa,
have you tried Ashton's ? me and hb get hooked for a while, we eat there 4 times, he said the steak is good and price ok .... Zack's exam is around the corner, hmm... you must be very bz, and lack of sleep liao

 

[didi]

kkf,
need a favour from you

can I have the contact of your part-time helper ? my sister needs to get 1, you can pm me.

 

[kkf]

dm, for gym, I have tried baby jumper, mygym, and tumbletots. Think mygym is better, more equipment.

I read a book says children involve in more gym activities will grow smarter.

didi, erm...you sure you want mine? Actually, I used to employ one china one, but she would not be able to make it for quite a few times, so I changed to another who stayed just nearby me, and she is a singaporean, but then hor, I dun really like her leh, cause she never empty my dustbins, never tidy my things one. Better dun recommend to you, not good.

haha, interesting we all have different languages of love. But really important to find out your partner's language of love, else you clean the house the whole day, in the end he doesn't appreciate, cause he may like you spend time with him better.

bloom, I am interested in the course leh, but then...clementi a bit far. but how to get 10 people?

Btw, my son fall sick very often, think yah after 6 months or wat. Anyway, last time used to bring him for tui na, so he was better. Now stopped and he fall sick once a month again. so sianz. My hubby also sick now. He is sleeping like a log now, cause he has fever. He just recovered from flu, now fever. wow.

btw, dm, it is good that you and ur hubby take a break together leh. My instructor said as couple, must take a break at least twice a year, away from children, and alone together. They so old liao (50 over) still will get away from kids, and go wat bintan, banyan tree watsoever.

So me n my hubby have decided to do the same...haha. but me really lazy to travel, think will just stay in nice good hotels in singapore.

I really need a break now. I feel sooo lazy to go to work liao...sigh. Lucky june is coming.

Btw, I have decided to change school for dash again. i really feel he is not learning, and what angers me most is the teacher said dash "ben zhong". I really dun like her words. She even said dash is "slow". I dun mind her saying dash slow, but ben zhong? wrong use of word = never think = dunno what she will say to kids. Anyway, dash was twice bitten and the two teachers could go unnotice! I fear if a child hit the head, they may not notice too!

 

[didi]

kkf,
Wah, how to go for twice yearly breaks ? me happy if can go for a break every 2 years now

yesterday nite, hb was just saying that one day we should send the kids and maid to either my parents or pil's place so that we can have the whole house to ourselves, so that we can relax

as for the part-time maid, it's ok my sis prefer locals, but seems your previous one is no good then I will let her know, thanks

 

[costa]

didi,
me hvnt tried ashtons yet..maybe shld as its near where my son has religious classes..

yah u are right..now is exam period....hv to get my son to study if not he literally bo chup type..

 

[disneymickey]

kkf,

gg penang w ws, so not really couple time. but was telling hubby if he's gg india 4 biz trip, i've decided to go w him, after i read on sun's papers on india. think if i dun go with him, won't hav chance to visit india.

if u r lazy to travel, go hotel stay oso shiok. try pulau ubin? think they got resort there?

oh no, sounds like the sch is not v gd. actually, was reading a booklet frm ws' sch ytd, discovered some writing error (in chinese, so i won't say it's spelling error). *roll eyes* so wat if it's kinderland?? think no matter wat sch we send our kids 2, we as parents still must monitor ourselves.

didi,
yes, couple time is very impt. sometimes, we'll take leave on weekdays, then bring ws to sch or my mom's place, then 2 of us juz go watch movie, shop, eat nice lunch/dinner. or can buy home &amp;cook simple stuff. juz eat in peace haha. but hor, every sun we;ll drop ws @ my mom's place after her dinner, so tat the 2 of us can go eat dinner alone. even food court oso gd. at least can talk.

 

[didi]

Costa,
Think boys are majority 'Bo Chup' kind

dm,
Good to go with your hb to India, me say only, don't think I will go India, the only things that will attract me is Taj Mahal, Pashima shawls only

I am worried of their 'hygience standards'

 

[disneymickey]

didi,
me oso worried, tat's y missed a chance to go with him few yrs ago. but think i'll go this time la. can join the day tours @hotels. so shld b q safe. as 4 food, if dun like the food (actually, i'm someone who doesn't eat indian food, q afraid of the various spices they used in cooking), take it as a chance to lose weight haha

 

[didi]

dm,
ya lor, if you eat at restaurants should be ok, not those roadside stalls

it will be an eye-opener

you so good can travel here and there so often *envy*

 

[xbliss]

hello mummies,

where is precious one? haven't seen her for a few days (or maybe i never pay attention to posts).

dm,
u know india produce a lot of bb products? hehe.. those tiny love and luvable friends got a lot of products made in india. maybe u can grab good buys. but then again, i also dunno which part of india will have and will be scared to roam that place. my hubby went india once for business trip.. but is those rural area. quite scary cos got a lot of beggar kids trailing him everywhere. i love indian food but the hygiene... tell me more if u go k?

didi
looking forward to your once in 2 yr break uh? hee. not easy to be sahm esp with 2 bum bums! one already i tak boleh tahan. hoping to go for a short trip when bryan hits one or at least can walk a bit!

 

[didi]

xbliss,
ya lor, with 2 bum bums, it will be so tiring to travel anywhere

it will be better when they are able to walk and eat other food so we don't have to bring too many things along

 

[daec]

bloom
depending on where meetup place is, I dun mind going for that course.

kkf
couple time is impt. but I sure dunno where to find e time and the focus. On weekends, my parents off time from taking care of Nada. I also feel guilty if weekend I ask someone take care of her. dun talk abt IL. schedule is so unstable better not to depend on them. So it dun matter even if she get used to them though hubby like to thk diff

but ah Iguess even dinner at home without the tv on and talking non-stress topics would help some

 

[jactey]

hi mummies..
how are you??????all the mummies here,,,cant list out all the name...i miss your...hope your miss me too....
long time never log in...busy...cos my 1st twins in hospitalised last two week...stay for 1 week.... due to fever-fits after that piti and phelgm go in lung, cos a bit of lung inflection...luckly i done for them, the preveer jabs....as least not so bad...but last few week was my busy and terrible matter happen in my house...after he back need to keli them,,,as i care the 1st twins in upstair..and my maid care for 2nd twins at downstair...after my 1st twin recover and no more cough,,,i go down...but the next day my 2nd twins cough and fever too...i am so scared...afraid he need to hospitalised again....after seing doctor he say monitar first...need to keli too and take medicine...i even draw a draft for his fever...ai yoh...really toutong...bring 2nd twins o upstair again....than my maid care for 1st twins...after 4day than my 2nd twins ok...i come down again...ha..very funny ha..stay at one home but cant see each other...lucky they never make noise...after the see each other they keeping sayang each other and hug together...very cute....
so this was my reason as i disappear...actually i always want to join your but cant stay at pc too long, now my boys very active,,they like to climp here climp there...
now i have some time here, so tell your my story ...seem like your talk for travel right...for me, very difficult to go anyway one....even singapore too difficult....

 

[disneymickey]

no la, no plan 2 go la. cos must wait 4 hubby 2 go, then i longpang .. so till now, no news of him gg there biz trip, so no new 4 me 2.. juz tossing ideas ard haha