Sigh... Now I know why they call them monster in laws
Obsessed with grandchildren
- Thread starter bbabyblue
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Sigh... Now I know why they call them monster in laws
DD was sick, we went home with her having running a fever. DD doesnt cling on me so much now cos I haven't been able to carry her as much. I'm getting big in my 2nd Tri. I understand abt children being overly dependent on maids. But seriously, me and my bro grew up w maids too, we are still close to our mother. In current times, not all can survive on 1 income. We r no longer in pil times, 1 paycheck feeds a family. Pil expect me to work so that hubby can continue to give them money in fact mil insist that I work openly. And expect dd to be closer to me than the maid. How is that even Possible? All working mums try their best spend every hour after work w their children. And still beat ourselves up that's it's not enough. My point is why do pil need to add on? When we were exploring childcare arrangements she insisted if want her to take care need to employ maid. Left right also need money, how to make everybody happy? We are all trying our best, but nothing is truly good enuff for them. Do they prefer I had a maid my DD rejects? Dd has been staying with pil for 8 mths I dun see dd clinging onto my mil either wor... Classic that everything is the DIL fault. It's just a nvr ending cycle.
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Hugs
I feel u.... I dun have a maid. Is my mum who helps.
When I gave birth to my no1, my hub asked if I wan to b sahm. My mil immediately say no. See, I have not replied n already got someone to ans for me....
My mil is a selfish woman who tells her two sons that they r not filial until she is at her deathbed. Tbh, her two sons r very very filial. One even wanted to bring her along on his honeymoon. They gave her a lot of money. Showered her wif a lot of time
But she thinks it is not enough....
Was ur mil a sahm too? Thank goodness for our moms!!! My mom helped me too, even paid first maids' agency fees and first 6mths to ease financial burden. Yet my PIL criticize my parents in front of my hubby. Just not in front of me. Hubby thinks I do not know. Say things like my parents control my hubby la, make us spend more time at my parents place. But the truth is we always give them priority but they have other activities last min cancel on us. So we head back to my parents place so that its easier for me I can get more rest given that I'm pregnant. But pil expect that even when they cancel on us, we cannot go to my parents place. Cos DD is theirs, not my parents... DD must spend more time with them.
I dun carry branded bag when mil carries coach and Michael kors. Wear prada sandals. We drive 2nd hand car Fil drive merc and BMW. Yes he has 2 cars. Hubby does his best to give as much as he used to before marriage. When mil goes vacation I also ask hubby give her some spending money. Pil dun seem to appreciate anything. To me to my hubby nothing we do is good Enuff for them. Sometimes I see my hubby do things for them I also sian for him. But then what to do it's his prerogative.
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Shoppixe, she claims to b a career woman when she is just a kitchen helper. Dun get me wrong. I have full respect for all jobs as long as it is honest work. But the way she says it, it sounds like she is in some high mgmt role.
I also feel sian when I see how my hub contributes, but he feels nothing. So nothing much I can do.
Sometimes I feel that our hub aka their sons, also play a part.
I also go back to my parents place often coz they will Xin teng my tiredness n help me wif my two kids. My mil? Her welfare comes first.. Even when her son's r involved.
In the past, I dun think much. But ever since I became a mother, I can understand a mother's sacrifices. Like how my mum willing to help me al the times although she nag too..haha
But when I look at her, I can only say that she loves her sons a lot as long as her welfare is not affected. If it does, sorry sons, u step aside.
Whereas for me now, I m willing to do anything for my two kids. I put myself in the second place. That is why I can't understand how a woman can b so selfish as to tell the sons that they r not filial until she is at her deathbed. What more does she wan? Sacrifice their happiness for her?
I vow to myself that I won't b like her next time.
I also feel sian when I see how my hub contributes, but he feels nothing. So nothing much I can do.
Sometimes I feel that our hub aka their sons, also play a part.
I also go back to my parents place often coz they will Xin teng my tiredness n help me wif my two kids. My mil? Her welfare comes first.. Even when her son's r involved.
In the past, I dun think much. But ever since I became a mother, I can understand a mother's sacrifices. Like how my mum willing to help me al the times although she nag too..haha
But when I look at her, I can only say that she loves her sons a lot as long as her welfare is not affected. If it does, sorry sons, u step aside.
Whereas for me now, I m willing to do anything for my two kids. I put myself in the second place. That is why I can't understand how a woman can b so selfish as to tell the sons that they r not filial until she is at her deathbed. What more does she wan? Sacrifice their happiness for her?
I vow to myself that I won't b like her next time.
Good question... I do not know
But I know my mil got a brother. And also being a woman (who had a lot of issues wif her own mil) I thought she will b able to understand another woman's difficulties
Coz went thr the same shi*
tensilestrain
Active Member
I think they only see the things they want to see. Just like my hb who can't see that how i treated them now is how they have been treating me.
Whatever the family do is right, i do is wrong even though is exactly what one of them is doing and mil has always nagged that i should follow.
Whatever the family do is right, i do is wrong even though is exactly what one of them is doing and mil has always nagged that i should follow.
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Mine is this case. No daughters... Think they have forgotten how tiring it is to bring up children. I just moved into my parents place, now pil making issues that dd is spending more time at my parents. Harlow, dd is staying there of cos more time lah. When dd stayed w them my parents also nvr said anything.
tensilestrain
Active Member
Mine different case. Got daughters but only 1 son. But same thing. They only want to spend 1 to 1 time with my sons.
I only have sons, no daughter. Hopefully i am not that kind of mil. But i already feel unease and threatened when there is another woman (mil and her unmarried daughter) present.
I only have sons, no daughter. Hopefully i am not that kind of mil. But i already feel unease and threatened when there is another woman (mil and her unmarried daughter) present.
bbabyblue
Active Member
I think all mil want to see things that suit their eyes and according to her liking. They expect everyone to give in to them and always assume they are right in every little things. Especially if our own husband is the cannot be bothered kind, they will have the tendency of giving their own mother the authority to make decision on behalf of them and even override our own decisions.
towkayneo
Well-Known Member
I totally agree. I think we ladies should be strong and stand up for ourselves and stop this from happening before the MILs swallow you up, leaving no bones! I would rather she see my black face than I see hers.
bbabyblue
Active Member
Whatever I argued my reasons with my mil, she will tell his son n his own husband that i am being disrespectful, rude, etc... to her. Then the 2 old folks will start comparing me n their trophy's wife, in terms of how they are being treated, etc... the trophy's wife only know how to apple polish my mil, don't have kids, hardly c the old folks. So the chances of having of getting conflicts with my mil is zero. Whereas us who have kids, trying to protect our kids are being labelled as bad daughter in law.
karoosel
Active Member
Parenting is hard enough as it is. With my mil, it is a never ending cycle of teaching, re-teaching, teaching, re-teaching..
Hubby and i are trying to teach our daughter to stay seated in her highchair till we are done eating or tidying up in the kitchen. When daughter stands up on her highchair, we tell her to sit down and wait a while. She usually does.. Unless super grandma comes swooping in and picks her up. Pfffftttt...
My post might not go well with many of you guys but To me, we shd treat PILs the way we treat our parents. You married the guy who was brought up by them. The up bringing somehow is related the the character of the hubby which makes u think that he is the one you are willing to spend your life with. Yes, there are horrendous habits of PIL that you cannot stand but are we really perfect in all ways as well. One must understand that marriage does not involve only the couple. Relationships between the couple and their parents/siblings are in package which might break the marriage. If you cannot stand your inlaws, avoid them loh. Get a maid to look after your kids and visit them only if it is necessary. Just maintain a cordial relationship instead of making yourself so stressful. Kids are smart as well, they will grow up picking up traits of the daily activities they observed. It is a cycle. In any case, while we may wish our PILs to be understanding, kind, patient, we must also know that old people are slightly more stubborn. If they are the monsters type, just give them the due respect that we shd do for old people and that's it. No need to care whether they like us or treat others better. The Hubby will also be happier if we don't complain to them everyday about their parents.
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
A perennial problem, isn't it? 
I've always thought it strange that, just by virtue of marriage to my other half, I suddenly get parachuted into another family. Calling my in-laws 'dad' and 'mom' were like... sooooooo strange. So funny. The differences in family cultures and practices, when they clash with our own upbringing, can result in very emotional clashes. Knowing also, that you will always be second fiddle to your PIL's own daughters is also an unpleasant feeling. Can't be helped, I suppose
But I would like to offer another perspective also.
On my part as a daughter-in-law, I always try to remind myself to love my parent-in-laws and to treat them well. I do so because I myself have a brother who is the only son of the family, and I want to be an example to him. Not a day passes without me praying that he will eventually choose a wife who is able and willing to take care of my parents in their old age. Imagine, if his wife is unable to accommodate my parents, his life will become a living battlefield. That would be so distressful for everyone concerned.
But, of course, I will also remind him that a woman is always very ke lian. They marry into a family and have to accommodate that family's cultures and customs. Like it or not, they will always be 'outsiders' to a certain extent, and they are vulnerable to being bullied by that family. He is the only one who can, and should protect his wife.
So, in a nutshell, we have to try our best to love our in-laws and treat them well. But if there is unfairness, hubbies MUST have the backbone to stand up for us and say 'hey, that's not the way to treat the woman I love'.
i.e. It's always the husband's fault
My 2-cents worth
I've always thought it strange that, just by virtue of marriage to my other half, I suddenly get parachuted into another family. Calling my in-laws 'dad' and 'mom' were like... sooooooo strange. So funny. The differences in family cultures and practices, when they clash with our own upbringing, can result in very emotional clashes. Knowing also, that you will always be second fiddle to your PIL's own daughters is also an unpleasant feeling. Can't be helped, I suppose
But I would like to offer another perspective also.
On my part as a daughter-in-law, I always try to remind myself to love my parent-in-laws and to treat them well. I do so because I myself have a brother who is the only son of the family, and I want to be an example to him. Not a day passes without me praying that he will eventually choose a wife who is able and willing to take care of my parents in their old age. Imagine, if his wife is unable to accommodate my parents, his life will become a living battlefield. That would be so distressful for everyone concerned.
But, of course, I will also remind him that a woman is always very ke lian. They marry into a family and have to accommodate that family's cultures and customs. Like it or not, they will always be 'outsiders' to a certain extent, and they are vulnerable to being bullied by that family. He is the only one who can, and should protect his wife.
So, in a nutshell, we have to try our best to love our in-laws and treat them well. But if there is unfairness, hubbies MUST have the backbone to stand up for us and say 'hey, that's not the way to treat the woman I love'.
i.e. It's always the husband's fault
My 2-cents worth
It is true that we shld try n treat them like our own parents
But what happen if we did but they still mistreat us? Worse, treat us a maid?
I always told my hub, I treat his parents as mine. Whatever I get for my parents, I make sure they do get a set too.
In fact I do treat my mil better than my own. At least I cooked for her when she sick, took care of her.
At the end of the day, she treated me as outsiders n even said that she did not have to visit me during my confinement coz there is no law that says mil have to visit dil after she delivered!
Can u imagine the pain?
sometimes I think if I have treated her as transparent, maybe I won't b hurt by her actions
But what happen if we did but they still mistreat us? Worse, treat us a maid?
I always told my hub, I treat his parents as mine. Whatever I get for my parents, I make sure they do get a set too.
In fact I do treat my mil better than my own. At least I cooked for her when she sick, took care of her.
At the end of the day, she treated me as outsiders n even said that she did not have to visit me during my confinement coz there is no law that says mil have to visit dil after she delivered!
Can u imagine the pain?
sometimes I think if I have treated her as transparent, maybe I won't b hurt by her actions
bbabyblue
Active Member
We can never treat our pil the same as our own parents. The basic communication is already different. I can talk to my parents like friends, talk about anything under the sun. But when talking to my pil, I have talk to them like talking to my boss or even CEO. No joke in conversation, everything is serious.
I ever ask my husband did he ever joke with his own parents, he said never and cannot.
I ever ask my husband did he ever joke with his own parents, he said never and cannot.
tensilestrain
Active Member
I used to think i should treat my inlaws the same way i treat my parents. Like bbabyblue, i can tell my parents anything but not my inlaws. Say anything not pleasant to their ears will result in people mocking or discriminste me in front of my children and whole family. There have been many people who told me old people are like that, she is lonely, they are trying to help etc. These people include my own mother. I had tried very hard believing what they said which resulted in me being very stressed and doubted myself as a mother.
Yes, marriage is not just abt the couple and i chose the man to be my life partner. Does it mean when there is no mutual respect from the other party, we as woman should just keep quiet and continued to be treated in that way?
I have never wanted to live in battlefield. But it does not mean when others cross the line, i should let them do so.
My hb was only stressed when he had no kids as his mother nagged at him. He was so stressed that he sank into depression and tried all possible ways to have me pregnant, physically and mentally.
After he has the first child till now, 4 yrs, there is no sign of depression. Why? I DON'T complained to him daily abt how his family and him discriminate me in the family and trying to stop me from bonding with my children. In fact he is very glad his mother's focus is no longer on him and told me to give up parenting to his family (aka his mother and unmarried sister).
Yes, marriage is not just abt the couple and i chose the man to be my life partner. Does it mean when there is no mutual respect from the other party, we as woman should just keep quiet and continued to be treated in that way?
I have never wanted to live in battlefield. But it does not mean when others cross the line, i should let them do so.
My hb was only stressed when he had no kids as his mother nagged at him. He was so stressed that he sank into depression and tried all possible ways to have me pregnant, physically and mentally.
After he has the first child till now, 4 yrs, there is no sign of depression. Why? I DON'T complained to him daily abt how his family and him discriminate me in the family and trying to stop me from bonding with my children. In fact he is very glad his mother's focus is no longer on him and told me to give up parenting to his family (aka his mother and unmarried sister).
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tensilestrain
Active Member
I agree with friends78 that kids are smart and they grow up picking up traits of the daily activities they observed. My elder son learnt from them that me as his mother can be ignored. It is precisely what i observed in his early growing days that made me decided to make a firm stand and not just continue to show 'respect' to others' wish in parenting and give way. If i had continued to 'let others handle' my elder boy as instructed by my hb, i won't be surprised that he only listens to my mil and that sil which would make me difficult to discipline him.
It is kind of sad to realise that my friends, relatives, colleagues and mum's friends have advised me how to bond with my children but my life partner actually want me not to bond with our children. In fact he himself is never active in interacting with the boys in the presence of his mother and that sister. He and his family are the only people that i know who actually stop the mother from going near her crying child. If i did not get my family to help me settle my boys after work, he most properly would still be taking the back seat when my family is around. At least i see him trying to interact more with the boys
It is kind of sad to realise that my friends, relatives, colleagues and mum's friends have advised me how to bond with my children but my life partner actually want me not to bond with our children. In fact he himself is never active in interacting with the boys in the presence of his mother and that sister. He and his family are the only people that i know who actually stop the mother from going near her crying child. If i did not get my family to help me settle my boys after work, he most properly would still be taking the back seat when my family is around. At least i see him trying to interact more with the boys
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bbabyblue
Active Member
Overall how man contribute to the family depends on his upbringing. Some men can single hand take care of babies/ kids no help from anyone whereas others rely alot on maids/ pil/ own parents. If man comes from a family that relies everything from a woman, eventually when married will also rely on his own mother on every small little things including buying food. When we have kids, n our husband cannot handle it, he will call SOS. So there is no way we can avoid our mil 100%.
I come from a family where u have to learn to be independent since young whereas my husband grew up like a flower in a greenhouse. When I teach my kids, I will want to teach them to b independent and don't rely on anyone, till now even my lo is a toddler my mil will still want to spoonfeed her and keep saying eventually she will learn. I asked her, how do u expect her to learn when u keep spoon feeding her? She is learning at all...
At the end of the day, when there is no one in this world you can rely on, one has to learn to rely on themself.
I come from a family where u have to learn to be independent since young whereas my husband grew up like a flower in a greenhouse. When I teach my kids, I will want to teach them to b independent and don't rely on anyone, till now even my lo is a toddler my mil will still want to spoonfeed her and keep saying eventually she will learn. I asked her, how do u expect her to learn when u keep spoon feeding her? She is learning at all...
At the end of the day, when there is no one in this world you can rely on, one has to learn to rely on themself.
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
It's sad that even in this day and age, there are still in laws who think that the DIL is married into the family to be slaves. Hope your hubby can shield you from them. Maybe if that's the case, avoiding is better than confronting.
No point
My hub insist his mum take care of our kids. How to avoid? He ot n I have to bring them back
The sarcasm is enough to kill u everyday
My parents brought me up to respect the elders n not to talk back... So I can only swallow all these
karoosel
Active Member
I did try to treat my mil as my own mother but id be lying of i say she treats me like her own daughter. I mediate between her and her own son, my hubby. I think he has had enough of her attitude as well. But after all of that, she acts like i gross her out to the point that she would take my baby's laundry (which i washed) and make sure it won't come into contact with mine. That i find ridiculous but it's been going on for almost 2 years.
Now we have to live in pils house until our bto is completed which i am hoping and praying that it will be completed soon after i pop out this 2nd AND last baby. Whenever the shifting house topic comes up, she down plays our new house coz it's small(er) -- newer btos are smaller than old ones, that we all know. I just smile and assure her that we will be happy to have our own home. It doesn't matter if it's a shoe box or a pigeon hole.
Few more months.. Few more months
Now we have to live in pils house until our bto is completed which i am hoping and praying that it will be completed soon after i pop out this 2nd AND last baby. Whenever the shifting house topic comes up, she down plays our new house coz it's small(er) -- newer btos are smaller than old ones, that we all know. I just smile and assure her that we will be happy to have our own home. It doesn't matter if it's a shoe box or a pigeon hole.
Few more months.. Few more months
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
Sarcasm is basically the coward's way of bullying people. You have to stand up for yourself, and in a polite way. Do it once, twice and thrice. After that, they will not dare to simply bully you. I give you example. When someone tried to sarcastically imply that I am not saying the truth, I actually looked at them straight in the face and said 'are you actually saying that I am lying? And what is your basis for saying that?' They did not expect me to call them out and they immediately stammered and stuttered and said 'no la no la'.
The elders are likely to say something like 'woah, just say you a bit than you react so big, so rude'. I will politely reply 'ya, it may be that I am reacting but what you are saying is very hurtful. Please refrain from doing so'.
They may be angry and complain to your husband. In which case, you should also let him know you are hurt that he has not been protecting you and you have been hurt by his mom's comments. 做事要讲原则。Elders or not, is another issue. If elders sprout nonsense, I will not hesitate to call them out, albeit in a civil manner.
The problem is she go to my hub n weep n complain ... Behind my back....I tried a few times... That is what she do
karoosel
Active Member
Hahaha! So true! Call them out and they turn 180degrees with "no la, no la.. Why are u so sensitive" lol. So funny to know someone with the same experience.
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
Must be strategic... you call and cry first! haha! say how your mother in law bully you, and you buey tahan no choice had to say back..
Your husband also ah... why never stand up for you? Actually I believe if DIL and MIL have problems, the husband is to be blamed for not managing the situation. They are the only ones who manage it.
Lol
The problem wif me is that it is between two women. Once so called settled, I totally forget until he came back n question me.... He did tell me to inform him first. But to me, it is not a problem after I say back. Is like, want to fight, fight like woman. Why pull innocent parties in?
How will I know she will make a big fuss over those trival issues
Sigh.. Thanks to her, all r now big issues...n I really hate it
It is so childish.. When I think back. Like two children fight. One lost, go n get helper
Lol
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
She's very strategic ma... she can't hurt you, she will make sure she does something else that hurts you. You must always tell your husband first, like that he won't be swayed by her version of events. Remember, the person who takes the first strike always has the upper hand!
Anyway, your hubby not innocent can? It's his job to manage his mom hor.
littlemonkies
Well-Known Member
I'm sorry you have to go through that. It really is awful.
Be strong, and build a strong relationship with your children.
Pray for your mother in law as well, that she would find peace in her heart. I always believe only those people with no peace within themselves would try to hurt other people...
He knows his mum pattern. Most of the time, both sons jus give in coz they know that it is useless to try n talk to the mum... To him, as long as there is peace n his mum happy, dun bother him, he will b happy
So most of the time he will tell me let's manage his mum together by giving in
bbabyblue
Active Member
Managed mil by giving in is only temporary solution, but doesn't solve the root of the problem. Giving in is encouraging the other party to create more problem in future. So what's the point of giving in when it doesn't permanently solve the problem.
Whenever I see the pattern that my mil is coming up with , I will tell my husband about it n ask him to tell his own mother.
If I still find my mil refuse to heed advice and act her way, then I will do the talking to her right infront of my fil, her trophy n wife.
I told him, 面子是人给的， 脸是自己丢的。
Whenever I see the pattern that my mil is coming up with , I will tell my husband about it n ask him to tell his own mother.
If I still find my mil refuse to heed advice and act her way, then I will do the talking to her right infront of my fil, her trophy n wife.
I told him, 面子是人给的， 脸是自己丢的。
I think it doesn't help when all the men in her life is giving to her all the time. N she thought she is ms know-all
That is why I m now very tired. I say her but the men standby her. What to do?
I realise it is better when I treat her as someone not important, not even a fren. Then she can do what she wan n I won't b affected.
I jus hope my ger has a better life than me.
I sound so negative, but ten plus years of giving in really take a toll
That is why I m now very tired. I say her but the men standby her. What to do?
I realise it is better when I treat her as someone not important, not even a fren. Then she can do what she wan n I won't b affected.
I jus hope my ger has a better life than me.
I sound so negative, but ten plus years of giving in really take a toll
tensilestrain
Active Member
Mum_gx, hugs. I understand how tired it is to be forced into playing politics in a family. Be strong.
karoosel
Active Member
She knows who her mom is and someday you will get her back. Do not hesitate to teach her what you learned from your experience. Prepare her for what may come when it is her turn to raise a family
you are stronger than you think, Mum_gx. Things you can't teach her now because of mil and unmarried sil, write them on a journal. I do this with my daughter. I "write" to her short notes with my thoughts so whatever may happen in the future, she will know me as i am now.
DawnBB
Well-Known Member
@tensilestrain, i just read your posts. I can't resist and have to say that it's inspiring that you found the strength to advocate for yourself and your rights with your children. I can't imagine how tough and tiring it is. Politics at workplace is unpleasant commonplace but still, that's with non-family people. When it's family members who hurt us or fail to empathise or have unrealistic demands, it's really heart breaking. I have had my fair share in my family but not with mil issues.
Hope things go well for you and your children. All the best
Hope things go well for you and your children. All the best
tensilestrain
Active Member
DawnBB, thanks. Hope everything goes well for you too.
bbabyblue
Active Member
Beside being obsessive with grandchildren, my mil seem to want to be the mother of my kids as well. Now is trying to over right my decision, telling my husband what kind of enrichment program my gal should attend, which CC she needs to go to, said will go n racky the place.
Told my husband, we as the parents are not yet dead. Don't need her to make decision on behalf of us.
Told my husband, we as the parents are not yet dead. Don't need her to make decision on behalf of us.
karoosel
Active Member
Lol. We can't seem to do anything that's just right. Mil has to have something to say about everything, hence most of the time we don't tell her details. It shortens the conversation. When she tries to pry (at this point hubby sure tune out already), I just assure her we are handling things the best we possibly could. It's the most polite way of saying "mind your own business, pls."Beside being obsessive with grandchildren, my mil seem to want to be the mother of my kids as well. Now is trying to over right my decision, telling my husband what kind of enrichment program my gal should attend, which CC she needs to go to, said will go n racky the place.
Told my husband, we as the parents are not yet dead. Don't need her to make decision on behalf of us.
Less details she knows, less headache i have to deal with.
U r lucky
My hub share ALL wif his mum
Zzz
She also tried to persuade me to put my boy in her preference cc, which is under her block. I told her politely no coz the teachers suck (I walk past everyday)
Then she can say nvm. My boy jus goes there for a while so that she can catch a breather
Faint to the max
bbabyblue
Active Member
Sometimes, my husband has big mouth will go n report even the smallest little things to his parents until I got very fed up. Told him, why do we need to report every move to them. They are not my boss, don't give me money and I don't work for them.
Now every month telling us current CC not good, must send to those with SPARK accredited center, those without are all lousy, etc...if everyone mindset is like her, then whole spore parents will be just queuing for those with accredited center cos nobody wants to go to lousy CC.
My mil mindset already got 'branding'.. cannot imagine if my children is under her care... every small little things must go for brand, if no brand then does it consider lousy ?
Now every month telling us current CC not good, must send to those with SPARK accredited center, those without are all lousy, etc...if everyone mindset is like her, then whole spore parents will be just queuing for those with accredited center cos nobody wants to go to lousy CC.
My mil mindset already got 'branding'.. cannot imagine if my children is under her care... every small little things must go for brand, if no brand then does it consider lousy ?
dloreangel
Member
mothers-in-laws have their set ways what to do.....
what to do.....
dloreangel
Member
my mil hinted to me many times to give her "monkey" grandchild...