MOMMY CLUB - Yr 2007 P1's (Yr2000 Millennium & Dragon Babies)

I woke up this morning just to realise that my husband didn't pack in my kid's chinese textbook, chinese test paper, consent form for tomorrow's event and pencil case.
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I had to be at my workplace from 7.30am to 6.30pm and had to go to my nephew's birthday party and meet up a friend who was depressed over work after that. I got home at 11pm and fell asleep in my working clothes after I checked on my kid who was already asleep. I feel quite upset that my husband doesn't try to take initiative to help me with all these little things. I really don't see what's so difficult about shoving those things into my kid's schoolbag when they were already packed together, on the table, beside my kid's schoolbag.

It's so easy for others to say,"Ask husband to help la" but others don't understand that husbands do not want to help.

When I ask him to engage a helper or a part-timer cleaner, he is reluctant to - correction: he simply refuses to - because I'm the free maid.

Why must women be the super human beings when we are labelled as the 'weaker sex'?

Haiz, I'm sorry, mummies. Grousing again.

The only consolation I have is my kid. I mentioned that I was so busy I forgot to tell her or prepare her for a Chinese test. She told me that she got 28 marks for the test. The first thought that came to my mind was: upon 50?!! It was upon 30.
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Actually, Chinese is not important in Singapore. But I feel that whatever she does, she needs to take it seriously and be conscientious in it. If I allow her to slack just because the test is not computed in the final score, she will learn to adjust her effort according to situations. And this is not one of the first thing I want her to pick up.
 


Jess, thanks... will be get a maid to help me to take care of the 2nd one n also house work...

Rains, i also dont trust my hubby with my gal's stuff... previously, i used to leave for work earlier than them... so my gal will either forget her water bottle or her wallet... luckily, student care will loan her water bottle or even $$... so i have to make sure that everything in before i leave the house... tiring man....
 
My hubby also like that...dun bother to look at my boy's bag. My boy once missed his cathecism class because both of them don't bother to read the note given by teacher about change in schedule that week. We turned up in church only to see a note that there's no class.

Well, like it or not we are expected to be super women.

Since school re-opened my boy had lost money for 2 consecutive days. Though we have no proof, we suspect someone from his student care took the money from his wallet as he always put it in his bag.

First day lost $3 ($2 is emergency money always kept in wallet) so he was left with $0.50 as his allowance is $1.50 per day. 2nd day worst...left with $0.30 only so I buay tahan complain big time to the school.
 
Rains,

perhaps it will make u feel better to know that most hb r like that, or similar. I have some fair share of bickering with hb abt the same thing too.

Yesterday i asked my gal which subject she is most interested in, and surprise surprise, she said Chinese. (no one at home speaks mandarin, and so far she has done well in Chinese since kindergarten days) she is least interested in Math and so so with English. I am jus as happy with her answer.

I too believe that whatever she does, she should treat it seriously and puts in the effort.

Janet,

ya. been working all this while, it feels odd if i stop totally. And there's already a maid at home, so i feel so redundant. Need to find some work to occupy my time, and of cos for the extra income.

Wil you be going to PH concert?
 
wen,

thats quite bad huh. My gal lagi silly. First day of sch, one of her classmate din bring money. My gal used $1 to buy her seaweed. Then used another 30 cents to buy biscuit for herself. Her allowance is $1.50
I told her why did you gave more to others and left with little for herself.

I was touched by her compassion but still heart pain la. People eat seaweed and my gal eat a miserable biscuit. And she even tell me, the classmate offered her 1 pc of the seaweed!!! i faint!
 
Hi Rains,
I think men are basically not able to multi-task where domestic affairs are concerned. My hubby cannot manage the 2 kids. We are expected to be super women in the house.

Sorry to say this, but I think the men are hopeless.

Dorothy,
When it was just my son then, I didn't need any maid. With a new arrival and the work involved, we had a maid. However I still have to be somewhat hands-on.

Cuddles,
With a maid around, she does the non-value added work so that I get to spend time with the kids and coach them in their work and play with them. My son insists that I attend his concert.

Just spanked him last night for talking back. He was practically on my nerves in the car on the way home from my parent's place last night and I calmly walked until we stepped into the house. Then I locked him in the room and whacked him properly.
 
Hi Cuddles,
Up till now, my son refuses to buy food from the tuckshop. So everyday have to think of what to give him for recess. Although the food sold at his tuckshop sucks, I still hope he learns to buy food.

Rains,
Just read yr post.
Wow your daughter got 28/30 for her Chinese. That's great. Actually Chinese is really much easier than English if the child takes an interest. This term, there isn't much Hanyu Pinyin. Even the ting1 xie3 is in Chinese characters.
 
I don't read my girl's communication book or check her bag. she's the one who nags me to sign her communication book or inform me if there are information leaflets

She knows what homework she needs to do daily. If she didn't do or forgets to bring her homework to school, she knows she is the one responsible for explanation to teacher.

I think I will continue to bo chap so that hopefully she can continues her current habit right into primary school

hehe, I think all mommies here are very resourceful. that's why kids & hubby all rely on you
 
Hi Wen,

The dates for the SA2 are out in the school's calendar with oral starting on 4th Oct 2007 and written papers starting on 22nd Oct 2007. You can check out the school's website. It'll be a stressful month !!

Hi Mummies,
Sorry for just "jumping in" like this. I do come to this thread but have not posted cos I got nothing much to contribute so just keep quiet.
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Hi Hippo,
I just can't sit back bcos my hubby can't be relied upon to check my son's work. As for homework, he knows what he has to do every night, so I just have to make sure he has done them correctly. In the meantime, I'm still packing his school bag every night. Most prob will let him pack his bag next yr.
 
Welcome EHYMum, thanks for the info. sigh...do all schools start SA2 oral same week?

It'll definitely be stressful for us. Think more nervous than we ourselves taking exams but we can always get pointers from mommies here who has been through SA1. For a start...how early do you mommies start their revision ah?
 
Hi Wen,
Are you referring to Henry Park oral exam ??

When the kids have exams, I think we as mummies are the ones MORE stressed bcos kids don't know what is the significance and importance of doing well.

Actually when the child is consistent with his/her homework, half the battle is finished. I chart out what his exam topics will cover for all 3 subjects on a big calendar. Then every night after his homework, we will cover either of the 3 subjects. I think can start preparing from Sep onwards. Hope I'm not too long-winded.
 
both oral and written lor...coz since day one i leave it to him to prepare himself for tests. the thought of having to sit down and revise topics with him makes me sian ;p okie...sep, noted...thanks!
 
Hi Wen,
My son's oral exam can be practised and memorized....Really funny and like drama. The kids are given a few rhymes (for Chinese & English) and they have to choose and memorize 1 for each subject.
You can start revising in Sep and nearer the exams in Oct, go through the topics he is weaker in. Hope this helps. I have to plan his timetable again and that alone makes me stressed and sian.
 
Janet

wa.. you so fierce to your boy ar? For the first half of the yr, I spanked my gal twice, both times cos I lost my cool while coaching her maths. really pull my hair out!

I wanted my gal to buy food from the tuckshop so that she learns to be independent, more confidence and learns the value of money. It really helps, you should really encourage ur boy to do it.

Like you, I cannot reply on my hb. I use to not pack her bag or check her diary every nite, just do it now and then. But realise there's always unpleasant surprises. So now i check her bag ev nite. And my gal has the habit of telling me no homework when there is, cos she doesn't want to do it in the evenings.
 
Cuddles,
My son is always testing his boundaries and my patience. In the prev term, he will tell me what homework he has. But now, he doesn't because he wants to meet his classmate at the library !!! His classmate will call at 7pm and ask him to meet him there. So I told him he needs to ask for permission and not decide on his own.
If I am not strict with him now, he will be very daring and hard to control.

Wen/Cuddles,
I dread to think of planning the time-table for Oct too. Such a mental torture leh.
My hubby told the boy to study for his spelling. The fella said, 'Not fair. Why must there be spelling ??' My hubby replied, 'Your mummy is also studying together with you. That's not fair to her also'.
 
Hi Cuddles,
This term's ting1 xie3 got more Chinese characters and no more hanyu pinyin hor ?? I made him learn 5 sentences last week and another 5 today. He complained non-stop.
 
Hi Mummies,

Do you have any problem getting your kid to sit down and do work ? I find that it is always a big challenge for me and my parents - my parents help look after him when I'm at work. My boy will find all sorts of excuses from needing to go toilet, hungry or simply just sit there and grumble. Also, he can be quite careless - any suggestions that we can do to help improve the situation ? Thanks.
 
Hi Wen,

Wonder how the oral for Henry Park will be like - if it is like what Janet has described for her son ..... maybe can ask the teacher so that we can prepare in advance.
 
Hi EHYMum,
Same goes for my son when he's at my parents' place...that's why we have to stay at home on weekdays (including Fridays from this term) bcos of his nonsense. Otherwise he will be like yours - hungry, thirsty, need to pee etc etc etc. Boys tend to be careless in their work and don't bother to check. I usually make him sit down and check every single word after he has finished and I will check b4 packing his school bag.

EHYMum/Wen,
My son was given both Chinese/English rhymes at the beginning of the term and I was wondering what they were for. Then his oral exam split into 2 parts - one was that dumb drama thing and the other is kan4 tu2 zao4 ju4 where he has to see a picture and describe in 7-8 sentences what it's all about.
 
Not only boys, my gal is just as naughty. When it comes to sch work, she will have same tactics - hungry, thirsty, need to pee, poo, too hot, here itchy there itchy ...

Lost my cool yday, and spanked her. she called me at the office to say neighbour who is same age invited her over to play. They like to run to and fro the 2 families. I was thinking holiday, let her play but told her to stop at 3:30pm and learn her chinese spelling cos i will test her when back. When i got back, she still watched TV with me aft dinner. Then at 9 i asked her for the list to do the spelling and u know what, she doesn't even know how to read a word from the list!!! I was so fuming mad and caned her palms.

And Janet, as u say, this term the ting xie so tough, and my gal is rather weak in Chinese character, so i am getting a little freaked. Like u, i wanted to split it for her, and she din even bother to learn the 1st half! Keep testing my patience!
 
Janet,

the english spelling is still ok, and she has learnt the 1st 2 which will be tested this week. Its the Chinese which is scary.. dun know how long bef i cant read the words.
 
Hi Janet & Cuddles,

It is a relief to know that my boy is not the only one like that ..... yap, he will also complain about being uncomfortable, scratch here scratch there *faint!!*

I'm worried about how he is going to sit through the SA2 at the end of the year as this will be the first time he is sitting for an exam.
 
Cuddles,
Looks like all the kids are the same then. When asked to sit down to do homework, all the nonsense will start. My hubby told the boy to learn the other 5 ting xie and he kept complaining difficult. After all the whining, I scolded him and he managed to remember in 15 min !!! This morning, I tested his English & Chinese spelling. Fortunately he got them right.
So, it's really whether he wants to learn or not.

EHYMum/Cuddles,
I told my son I will use the cane to scratch since he complained itchy here and there. Then he sat down to learn his spelling. Cand die.
 
Agree. Sometimes the work can be done in a very short time, it is only if he wants to sit down and concentrate working on it or moans and groans.

Janet, about using the cane to scratch .... my hubby also said that to our boy - where itchy he'll help him to scratch with the cane.
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Sometimes my boy drives me up the wall but other times, I'm afraid that very soon, he won't want to go out with me any more. During his holidays, I'll take leave and bring him out. I really enjoy such times. However, in another 6 - 7 years, it might be considered very uncool to go shopping with his mummy and I'm starting to fret over this now. Any of you mummies feel the same ?
 
EHYMum,
If the child is motivated or has a carrot in front of him, he/she can put her mind to get the job done in a very short period. You'll be amazed.

Hey, both of us think alike. Right now, I get my hubby to apply leave so that we can bring the kids out. But when he goes to secondary school, he will not want to go out with his parents anymore. By then, his peers are more impt, and hanging out with them is more cool. Even now when I give him a hug, he wriggles away from me or giving him a peck on the cheek, he says YUCKS.
 
Hi Mummies
I feel very consoled when I read your posts. So my boy is not the only one who can't sit still. He is willing to do his homework but when it comes to doing revision or assessment paper, he will whine and whine. Whenever he faces difficult topics, he will cry first, get scolded by me and then laugh when he realises that it is not so difficult after all.
For spelling and tingxie, he has done quite well so far without much help - I am not sure is his school standard too simple. May I know what sort of words are your kids having for spelling and tingxie?
 
JessChan,
I think boys generally have this problem with the word 'CHECK'. My son is capable of writing the wrong word when it is right in front of him !! His attention span is at most 30 min, after that his backside itchy and can't sit still.

For English spelling, he has words like 'bark, neigh, meow, know, when, calves'. English spelling no problem so far. Chinese ting xie will be in short phrase
 
Its always good to know we all mummies are not alone in dealing with our children.

My gal love the color pink. Ev thing oso choose pink. Tat day my hb scolded her and say u like pink rite? I will buy a pink cane for u! hehe.. so scary...

I hope gal will be closer to mummy. I too enjoyed gog out with my gal during the holidays. Just her and me. I waiting for the day i can go travelling with her. or shopping at the same dept. Of cos soon they will wanna be with their frens more..

Sometimes when i bring my mum out I will think when i was young, my mum brought me out and i was dependent on where she brings me to, now the cycle reverse and she is dependent on where i bring her to. Next time it will happen to me and my gal.
 
Jess

to add on Janet's words,very soon I will not be able to cope with her ting xie words! (Janet's boy n my gal same sch)

but generally, the kids are better than we expect la, I jus believe dun let them be lazy.
 
My boy is the same as Jess'. He will do his homework but will start whining when asked to do assessment books or when my parents try to revise his work with him. Sometimes even having a carrot in front of him doesn't work.

I try to recall this week's spelling lists : a bag of rice, a bottle of oil, chillies, onions, cucumbers .... there are 5 more words which I can't remember ..... cham, old liao.

As for Chinese, there are 5 words and this varies from a single word (e.g. ma => horse) to a sentence (e.g. you and I go and look at flowers).
 
Cuddles,
I hope my daughter will be close to me esp after she has grown up...waiting for the day when just me and her go shopping like me and my mum.
My son is already having Chinese tuition every Sat...worse case if I can't cope than have to go twice a week.

Jess,
Kids today are not stupid...esp if they know how to be lazy.

EHYMum,
My son also complains when I make him do assessment books. Usually I get him to do it only near exams and you know what he tells me ?
'Mummy, my teacher already asked us to do last year exam paper today. I am so tired. Can don't do anymore ?'
As for ting xie, it also varies from 2 characters to short phrase this term. Very diff from last term when just 2 characters or hanyu pinyin.
 
Sigh...this morning my boy told me he forgot to learn his spelling for today...jialat.

EHYMum, is the chinese spelling list given to the kids oredi? I have a friend who's kid is in P2, maybe i ask her how's the oral. Hope not drama like janet's ;p

We don't have a cane at home and my boy has never "tasted" one before...coz we scared lose control will whack him like seow.

He will test our patience too but he very kia-si so we could use scare tactics and reverse psychology. We'll just tell him, "you dun want to do right? ok, you dun need to do it" then he scared oredi and kuai kuai do lor.
 
Hi Wen,
Actually I've not bought the cane yet. I just whacked him with my hands. He knows it's painful and I will spank him where he can't cover.

Don't understand why he drives me nuts everyday...I am afraid I will lose control if I have a cane at home. I use reverse psychology and it works sometimes. So I tell him it's ok if he doesn't finish his homework or learn his spelling bcos he is the one who will fail, not me.
 
Thanks for sharing. My boy's tingxie is probably simpler (although the format is similar) since his school doesn't offer higher chinese at this stage.

My boy also drives me nuts almost everyday. He has full of energy when it comes to play but he is like a deflated balloon whenever he is asked to do work. Sometimes I really envy those parents with kids who are more studious and less playful like my niece. She is just P2 but very self-motivated when it comes to studies.If only my son is half as hardworking as her...
 
What you mummies have described with regards to doing work sound very familiar
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. I have a colleague whose son is very disciplined. He'll follow the timetable that my colleague's wife (a FTWM) has drawn up for him. Sometimes I wonder why other kids can be so disciplined .....

With regards to cane, we have 2 - 1 at our house and 1 at my parents' place though my parents have never used it on my boy. In fact, my boy was the one who suggested that we get 1 for my parents' place
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.

Wen, the ting xie list was given last week and the ting xie should start this week.
 
EHYMum,
Yr son sees the cane as a form of motivation ??
I wonder why some kids are so disciplined when I am a SAHM and my son drives me nuts.

My son's Chinese & English spelling today. Will test him b4 he goes to school.

Jess,
I can only hope my son has the same energy for studying and homework.
 
When we bought the cane, he was around 4 years old and does not know the "taste" of it. Usually when we buy things, we will get an extra set to put at my parents' place so he helpfully reminded us to get an extra cane for my parents' place
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.

He is also having his English spelling today.

Same here - just don't understand why when it comes to play, he is like a dragon and when it comes to study, he is like a worm.
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we dun have a cane at home too as my hb disallows it. I used to use my hand but aft spanking, my palms so painful, so i use this stick left from last year's lantern festival. haha.. but i seldom whack her la.. so far ony 3 times.

My gal not ony sch work, her piano lesson also killing me! i know she can pick up fast and good in it but complacency breeds laziness and laziness breeds uselessness. She also lazy to practise and worst of all, my gal can lie (poorly). Say practise already, or no homework etc. It upsets me even more.

Janet

I bought it for her leh. She told me its a must wor. Says its needed during the music lesson. Rather expensive $20.50 comes with a photocopied binded book.
 
EHYMum,
Now we stay at home on weekdays and go over to parents' place only weekends since he can't concentrate there. Hungry, thirsty, tired of writing, need to pee and worse of all, sleepy. Then he will paint such a pathetic look and my parents will tell him to take a rest at 9pm !!! When he's at home, 9pm is the time he is still sitting down to finish his homework.

Cuddles/EHYMum,
I think all our kids are the same - Play NUMBER 1, Study ZERO.
 
EHYMum, i checked with my boy's classmate's mum and she says she don't have chinese spelling list as well. Heard that they changed chinese teacher, so effectively they have new teachers for all their core subjects this term...sigh...
 
Cuddles,
I just saw my son's timetable for today...Jelak man, 4 periods of Chinese lessons b4 recess!!! No wonder he is so bored. I never had 3 lessons of Chinese in a row when I was in school then. Guess that's what they mean by SAP and Higher Chinese. My son tells me his classmate keeps yawning and I think he does too. Bcos his teacher doesn't know how to make the lessons more interesting.
 
Hiya mummies,

I think boys are generally very active. I'm always very thankful that mine is gal becos I know I can't handle boys.
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I can't even play their games - I think boys' games are very boring compared to gals'.

As for spanking, there's something you might want to ponder over:
Hands are for blessing, and canes for spanking.

Someone once said, if you always use your hand to spank the child, one day, the child will shun your hand when you lift it up becos he thinks you're going to spank him again.
 
Janet,

Wow, 4 lessons of Chinese consecutively is quite long. Is it daily? My boy only has 2 or 3 periods daily for Chinese and the school has started a pilot project using Doraemon comics to make the lessons more interesting.

We used to use the cane but we decided to throw the cane away a few months ago and use other forms of punishment instead. We find that using the cane only causes more anger and stubborness instead of solving the root cause of the problem.
 
Jess,
I guess that's what Higher Chinese is all about...even Civics and Moral Education is in Chinese. There is a lot of exposure to Chinese. Only Wed has 4 lessons, the rest of the days have either 2 or 3 in a row (1 hr or 1 1/2hrs)
 
I think all schools conduct Civics and Moral Education in Chinese. Only Health Education is in English.I think for Higher Chinese, the child needs to recognise more characters.
 


Wen,
Your boy change form teacher as well ? I think for my case, the Chinese teacher is still the same cos my boy says he treated the whole class to icre-cream last Friday - really very nice of him. I'd better go ask him if the form teacher is still the same.

Janet,
Yawning is not that bad. Heard from my son that one of his classmates dozes in class
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.

Rains,
Something to ponder over .....
 
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