IVF Mummies-To-Be Support Group

Zaza,
Congrats on the arrival of your 2 beautiful babies!
Thanks for sharing your birth story here. Your ordeal sounds a little scary though. But I'm glad that both you and the babies are fine now.
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What are the weights of your babies? Did you have epidual or GA?
Anyone else to help you out besides the maid? If there's no one else, maybe it's not a good time to replace the maid? My new maid just came for 2weeks+. There's nothing much for her to do except simple cooking and cleaning of the house now. I hope she won't give me much problems when the babies pop cos I'll be the one training her.
Meanwhile, take care and rest well!
 


Nctgrace, yes my baby poop as often as 8-10 times in the 1st month. Now 1 day can poop 1-2 times, next day poop 6 times. As long the colour n texture are right then not to worry.

Zaza, u are very very brave n great mommy. Yup your twin are blessed to have u. Looking at the pair we can only feel your happiness n not your ordeal.
Keep a look out for your emotion ok. Don't want it to become postnatal blues.

For TMC tour, u jus need to know the labour room is on 2nd floor n how to get there u are alright already ;)
 
Bing
did u get a indo or Filipino helper? I also agree to get one weeks b4 the babies arrive so can train a little but my hubby still quite not comfy w maid around the house. Everytime I talk abt getting a maid he will brush aside and say see first . I give up liao. He think babies are easy to take care. Just feed them put them to sleep sigh
 
nctgrace
How old is your gal ? If on bm, that's ok, otherwise, if on fm, can try to thin the milk a little. If its colic, it usually gets better when the baby is about 3 mths.
U can try to put baby to sleep in a sarong or "yao lan". My friend also had a baby who has difficulty sleeping, she tried the sarong and it worked for her. I think they like the feeling of being cuddled and being rocked.
 
Nancy,
Mine is a Indo helper. Initially, my hubby and I were not very comfy with having an outsider at home cos we are used to just 2 of us. But since I'm having twins and will have to go back to work after ML, we are left with no choice but to engage a helper. We are still trying to get used to having another person at home all the time even though she's already here for close to 3 weeks.
Men are like that. They think that babies are easy to take care, especially if you don't intend to bottle feed, all the feeding will be done by us and they think that they don't have much to do. You have to talk to him slowly to let him know that taking care of a baby is not easy. If you have married friends with kids, ask them to talk to your hubby so that he'll slowly see the picture.
Are you expecting twins and is there any other family members to help you? If you are expecting twins and have no one to help, it's necessary to engage a helper probably 1-2months before delivery so that you can train her to do housework first.
 
Zaza,
Congrats on your twins... Must have been quite an experience for u.. U're such a brave mummy. Dun worry abt not being able to give them bm.. I think its ok.. As long as all of u safe can already... U rest well and take care k...
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Panda,
Ask u arh.. I see that u are getting quite a few items from mothercare, do u already have the member card? Need to accumulate at least $300 in 3m to get 1..
 
Panda,
U mention u bought some wireless, seamless bras from sloggi right? I bought some yday too. REally very comfy and its cheap too. Buy 2 get 1 free..
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I gt their undies too.. 3 for $15.90.. Very comfy and cheap too.. So happy!
 
tickles, i bought from sorella leh.. not sloggie.. hee.. $22.90 each...also buy 2 get 1 free...

undies i bought from M&S coz their cutting is bigger.. i m fat hippo now..hahahahah...

i dun hv mothercare card leh.. my gf pass me hers.
 
Panda,
Wahaha! Didnt realise I type in sloggi.. Oh oh.. yes.. Its sorella... Keke~ Blur liao..
Yes, $22.90. Buy 2 get 1 free.
happy.gif
Only thing is limited colours.. icic... cos i wa like trying to accumulate receipts but i doubt i'll hit $300 by the end of this month. Now only gt $150 accumulated only... Cos really never buy there often. Things are very ex..

Bing,
I buy sorella not sloggi. I bought from metro. They are having sale now..
 
Babyhopeful,
I got my towel from tmc parentcraft when i attended their class. I find the towel has less lint which is better.
I bought another receiving blanket from parentcraft too. They will give one on the day of discharge but it's a little small compared to those outside ones. Otherwise, can use cloth nappy to wrap but bb will outgrown it quite fast.

Anyone knows if bb poo green watery stools, is it due to my dairy intake?

I have good experience with tmc and will go back again if i have another, unlikely though.
I find their service quite prompt and price reasonable. I think we only paid like less than 3k after deduction for 1-bedder,epi c-sect and my hubby stayed throughout the 3 nights with me.
 
tickles, i dump all my receipts already! if not i can pass to u... alamaks....

yeah..their things are quite expensive...tht i agree.. few small items will cost a bomb... only worth checking out when they hv sales... but i like their pregnancy support belt... compared a few brands n material.. find theirs ok for the price.

sorella undies cutting super tiny! hahaah.. confirm i cant fit :p

i love their bras too.. so cheap n good right..hehe.. but they dun have wireless tube bras. if not i will also buy....
 
tickles, i remember u hv a few confinement contacts? can pass me those tht u are not engaging?

i discuss w hb at length.. feel more at ease if there is an extra pair of hands around... very worried mil cannot handle..
 
The sorella bras u gals buy.. Is it for nursing?
Now i usually didnt wear bra when i go out leh.. Cos v uncomfy.. I only use nipple shield...
 
baby, those are not nursing bra.. but my gf wore it for nursing too.. just stick the breast pads inside.....

this bra is very comforty.. coz wireless, seamless n soft... lightly padded.
 
Bing
Thanks. Can ur indo maid understand English? I heard now got problems bringing in Filipino maids. Sigh..My hubby is only son and ZERO idea of infants and kids. His friends have either no kids or not married yet. I have confirmed a CL to help and intend to look after the twins till at least 18 months after which I can go back to work when they go day care.

I will slowly infuse that I will need help after the CL leaves. My Mil says she will come and help but u never know. Maybe in the end she just come once a week or we have different views on baby issues. Our Mothers still can tell them, MIL how to? My mother is staying very far and not likely she can come everyday to help.
 
Panda,
Aiya.. shld have told u earlier... Keke.. I PM u the rest of the CL contacts k... Must go dig out first..

The sorella undies very small cutting meh? But the ones I bought is very stretchy leh. Its those midi cut de.. And I only bought M.. U are quite small build too right? The undies will be just under the tummy de leh... Btw, I bought a wireless tube bra yday too leh. The brand is call Bee Dees. Comfy and soft too.. Bought it at $26.90. Its at Metro in Paragon. Maybe u can go see see.
 
tickles, thanks thanks! i m trying to talk to one today... hopefully can secure a suitable person soon.

i bought M&S size 12 when just preggie... now its tight.. so i upgraded to size 16! :p i oso wear below the tummy...bt the whole hip like super expanded :S i small build w alot of fats now..hahahha....
 
Pandawife - can ask u .. that time did u take yr an tai herbs all the way till finish ...

My MS is starting to kick in ... scared i drink liao will really vomit out
 
JJ, i took until about 11 weeks.. intially ok.. can eat the med even w MS.. bt after 11weeks, start to throw up more after the med, so i stop.
 
Grumpus,
I read about the hindmilk/foremilk thingy. My boy tend to release the nipple so i tot he is done and i will switch to the other side. I will try to let him latch on the same side longer then.
 
Nctgrace, you are not alone. My two babies also have problem sleeping at night. Even after feeding, they also dun want to sleep and keep on making noise. Now with the CL and maid around, I still can wake up 2-3 times at night to express milk. My CL also leaving in 3 days time and I think I'll go insane too with the 2 babies. Although the maid can help and cannot completely rely on her, she act on instructions given to her. The most headache part is my MIL keep on complaining abt her to my hb. Taking care of two babies already stress...still have to handle the "politics" between my MIL and maid. Sigh~
 
Bbhp,

First few weeks are tough. Once they get into routine, it will be better. I find that separating them at night works for me. Now they zzz through. Before this they were confuse between day and night.
 
Singapoh,
ah why leh? just reply and reply, shd be no change in the email add mah.
dunno if u pm me again can go through or not
 
Grumpus,

Never mind la. Talk here also the same. U sun wan a CL ah. Will yr MIL do all housework and cook for u? Also u got an older child. Is she attending CC? I sent my son before I pop. Dun wan him to feel "unwanted"
 
Stb, my hb already busy with his work and since bbs born, he has been staying up late to feed bbs medicine and ensure CL feed them milk. Though I always complain to him about MIL, CL and maid, he also tried to talk to the maid but this also does not resolve the problem. Like Singapoh's ex-CL, mine is another KPO and gossip type..I can't wait to send her off!!! I'm counting down to the end of confinement which is another 4 more days to go. But after that, me n my hb sure damn shack cos we got to take turns for night feeds liao.
sad.gif
Still no courage to latch on yet. Perhaps after CL leave and things get settle down then I try latch on again.

Singapoh, I also want to separate them but space contraint leh. My hb needs to work next day so I do not want to put one of them to sleep with us. You are not giving them any night feeds and they can sleep throughout? I wonder when is that day going to come for me. Basically, I wake up 3 times in the middle of the night and daytime no rest at all. I gonna breakdown soon...
 
JJ,

You start to have MS liao huh? I also dun know whether mine considered MS boh cos on and off, not everyday thingy...example, yesterday I felt a bit of headache and dizzy and felt like throwing up...but today I am totally fine...so dun know my MS kicks in already boh...
 
ya prayhard - since wed night i start to feel uncomfortable already but not fully feel like puking ...

then today whole day have the feeling of puking ... but no actual stuff comes out ... i have to act fine in front of my colleagues ... so terrible feeling
 
Singapoh,
my MIL will do all the housework and laundry. i hv no complaints abt her level of cleanliness and handling housework. in fact last time when i delivered #1 she told the CL no need to do any housework so end up the CL very shake leg lor.
my #1 not attending CC but will be starting pre-nursery.
the plan is MIL will cook for #1, if she hv time then cook for hb and herself if not just dabao lor. i will order confinement catering for myself.

hb and MIL will handle #1 lor, feed, bathe, send to school etc. my girl is quite independent and can be left alone to play by herself while MIL hv to cook, wash up etc.
i will handle #2 myself.
 
BBHP, try to rest since ur CL is still ard, coz u will prob b e main caregiver after she's gone. I know it's not easy. I already find it v tough w 1 baby so I can imagine how tough it's gog to b for twins ESP for 1st time mummy. Try to stay strong for ur bbies, we are ard to talk if u need someone...u hv my no rite? I may not b able to offer gd advises as I'm aso clueless n helpless at times, I can offer u a listening ear..
 
Singapoh,
my MIL is a great help in cooking and housework. she is more a cleanliness freak than i am, hahaha. she is quite ok with my older girl also.
only she is really bad with babies :p

initially when my older girl was born i plan to let her take care and go back to work, but she really cannot handle my fussy girl so end up i quit my job and became a SAHM.
but now that my girl can communicate it's much better, plus hb will be around for that mth so i expect that between the 2 of them they can handle everything else bah.

i really hope the arrangement works man, otherwise i will surrender and move to my mum's place for a mth again :p
 
Bbhp,

It's very tiring if u bf yr babies and they are in another room coz u will be going in and out of yr room. I did that when I had my big son. It was very tiring.

When I put my twins in 1 cot. 1 started to cry and the other will follow. It went on every single night and nobody gets any zzz at all.

I started training them when they were abt 9.5 weeks old. They zzz through since 11 weeks old. I give 6 full feed during the day which mean keep them awake till they finish their milk.

My twin boy zzz 8 hours straight and sometimes he fuss a bit in the middle of the night. I would just ignore him and he zzz on his own.

When my twin gal returns home, she would zzz for abt 7 to 8 hours too.

I will wake up once at night to pump milk before feeding them.
 
Singapoh, alvis has been waking twice for 2 nites Liao... I wonder when will he get back to jus e 4-5am feed instead? Otherwise, I may hv to gv fm at e 1st wee hr feed...
 
Stb,

If my bbs wants milk at night, I will just latch on till they zzz and not keeping them awake for a full feed. I dun wanna encourage them to wake up in the middle of the night for milk. It can become a habit, not because of real hunger.

My MIL give the last feed which is a fm too early at 9 pm that is why my gal wakes up at 4 am for milk. When she is bk home, we give her around 10 to 11. She zzz till 6 to 7 am
 
Bbhp,
Taking care of 2 babies at a time is really not easy. It'll be my turn soon and I also wonder whether I can cope. Hang on there and think positively. Try to rest as much as possible before your CL leaves. I have no experience in this area so can't help you much. But we will always lend you a listening ear and hope that you'll feel better after venting out your frustration here.
Oh by the way, does your maid wake up to help you in the middle of the night or do you intend to let her wake up after your CL leaves? The employment agency told me that we can actually ask the helper to wake up in the middle of the night to help out, but just make sure that we let her sleep in the afternoon to make up 7-8hrs of sleep for them everyday. I'm wondering whether they will be too tired in the daytime and can't work properly if they have to wake up at night.

Nancy,
My helper can understand and speak simple English and Chinese. I would say that she's quite intelligent and is a fast learner as she's able to pick up Chinese sentences after working for a Chinese family for 2 years. That's the main reason we picked her and her pay is actually higher than other Indo maid. You can let the employment agency know your requirement if you are going to engage a maid next time.

I think even if you plan to stay at home for 18 months to take care of your twins, you'll probably need another helper to be around otherwise it'll be quite difficult to cope. At least the helper can do the cooking, washing etc when you are taking care of the babies. Your MIL can help to supervise the maid but you can't really rely on your MIL. You can't actually order her to do work for you right and there's sure conflicts. I have a few friends whose MIL offer to help but in the end create more problems instead. It'll be the best if our own mother can help us.

Talk to your hubby slowly and let her see the picture. Or maybe you want to share with him the infant care experience of the ladies here and let him know that it's really not easy to take care of babies. If he's really concerned about you, he'll be able to understand. Otherwise get him involved in the infant care so that he can really experience it himself and engage a maid after the CL leaves.

Tickles,
I'll go and check out the sorella bra and undies and see whether it can be used as nursing bra since it looks quite comfy.
happy.gif
 
Bing,

1 of my ex maid's duty is to give midnight feed. Not even once she did that and yet she complained a lot of work. Like yr maid, she is smart (more of a sly) and speaks Mandarin. She told many lies and gave many excuses for all her mistakes. She thought I was dumb just because I didn't probe further. She also had mood swing and showed black face. She started slacking after 3 months.

She worked on a snail pace and didn't help me with my twins. I was really exhausted not only taking care my twins on my own, also some housework which she kept forgetting. I was so tired of keep reminding her. How can she forget a daily chore?

The last straw was when I found out that she brought my big son along when she met her lover. I hv never been so angry in my life before and at the same time felt betrayed by her, I gave her a good scolding on the day she left. My dh said I was very fierce.

No matter how good yr maid is, u need to draw a line so that they dun take u for granted.
 


Amazingly my maid found a lover when we just moved here in May. She already started seeing him in July. I suspect it's even earlier than that.

It's quite scary how she has been watching me and able to squeeze some time to meet her lover.

Oh she also decided not to cook during the weekends and change her timetable without asking me. Woke up late and I never say anything.
 
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