Nanz, I'm so sorry to hear about it. After a good cry, please pull yourself together, for the sake of your health. Do not blame yourself. Take care. Tiao yourself b4 you start your FET. I think don't rush, since you were already in your 12th week. Bu your body b4 you start again.
IVF/ICSI Support Group
- Thread starter tomatoes
- Start date
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Poohy,
Long time no chat. Thamks for your well-wishes. I still go to your blog on & off to check out your babies!
Long time no chat. Thamks for your well-wishes. I still go to your blog on & off to check out your babies!
Nanz
Sorry to hear for your lost. Understand how you feel now. I have m/c at beginning of the year.
Please dear, you really have to take care cos this is a crucial period to "bu" your body.
Please do a mini confinement at least for 1 month. You can ask your HB to go to Fu Hua to ask for the recipe for m/c to boil the water to drink during this period. I remember some of the ingredients are red dates, blue dates and "tang sheng" and others...
I also took "dang gui" alternate day. All my foods were with ginger and sesame oil to get out of the wind.
But I don't know the timing to take the "bu" if you need a D&C. FYI, I don't have any D&C as mine was only 6 weeks. May be other sisters can help.
One good new is my girl friend who has IVF also lost her bb when she reached 10 weeks, and she manage to conceive naturally in the subsequent month of her m/c. Now she is in her 7 months. Think positively, ok?
Take care.
Sorry to hear for your lost. Understand how you feel now. I have m/c at beginning of the year.
Please dear, you really have to take care cos this is a crucial period to "bu" your body.
Please do a mini confinement at least for 1 month. You can ask your HB to go to Fu Hua to ask for the recipe for m/c to boil the water to drink during this period. I remember some of the ingredients are red dates, blue dates and "tang sheng" and others...
I also took "dang gui" alternate day. All my foods were with ginger and sesame oil to get out of the wind.
But I don't know the timing to take the "bu" if you need a D&C. FYI, I don't have any D&C as mine was only 6 weeks. May be other sisters can help.
One good new is my girl friend who has IVF also lost her bb when she reached 10 weeks, and she manage to conceive naturally in the subsequent month of her m/c. Now she is in her 7 months. Think positively, ok?
Take care.
amateur_ivfian
New Member
koala,
Thanks. Hope all of us will be well & healthy & all will conceive ultimately.
Thanks. Hope all of us will be well & healthy & all will conceive ultimately.
Thank ladies....I'm quite ok now though still grieving for the loss...
I have call up KK jus now, was told FET dun need to make booking...they told me to go down after my AF come.
Perhaps u all may think i'm rushing into it...but i just feel the earlier i thaw the embyros, it may be better since only just put in last 3 mths..maybe i may just change my mind later on...but at tis moment i just hoping to go thru it again.
This one mth will definetly eat lotsa of 'bu' to tiao my body so tat i can be strong for the next one. My mum did brew some tonic for me today.
Thanks you ladies for all the valuable advices...now the only way to make myself better is tat at least i know i can conceive.
I have call up KK jus now, was told FET dun need to make booking...they told me to go down after my AF come.
Perhaps u all may think i'm rushing into it...but i just feel the earlier i thaw the embyros, it may be better since only just put in last 3 mths..maybe i may just change my mind later on...but at tis moment i just hoping to go thru it again.
This one mth will definetly eat lotsa of 'bu' to tiao my body so tat i can be strong for the next one. My mum did brew some tonic for me today.
Thanks you ladies for all the valuable advices...now the only way to make myself better is tat at least i know i can conceive.
Nanz
I think it was the second month after she did her D&C. At first she thought she missed her af cos her body needs sometime to adjust back (cos her 1st af also took long to come) so din bother to check. What I know was she took 3 months unpaid leave to rest at home after her D&C.
Heard ppl said the first 3 months after m/c is the most fertile period. But, "sayang", this didn't apply to me.
I think it was the second month after she did her D&C. At first she thought she missed her af cos her body needs sometime to adjust back (cos her 1st af also took long to come) so din bother to check. What I know was she took 3 months unpaid leave to rest at home after her D&C.
Heard ppl said the first 3 months after m/c is the most fertile period. But, "sayang", this didn't apply to me.
nanz,
have pm you my number, do call me if you need. first you must understand that this is no fault of you or whoever, there is always risk involve in all pregnancies including natural pregnancy, as high as 25%. If your foetus is healthy, you will be able to carry it to full term even though you eat cold stuff or unhealthy food but if your foetus was not a good foetus, it will eventually stop growing by itself no matter how you prevent it so it is not becos you do this or did not do that.
think postive and you now know that you can get pregnant one and some women tried many years to conceive and fully succeeded, after that first bb, the second one just comes naturally and easily, something like your womb system get a overhaul after the first pregnancy and your system becomes normal again for natural, so dun give up hope. try to conceive naturally after 1 or 2 cycle later, chances are there.
Go and see this chinese physician if you want.
Dr Tan siew buoy
thong Chai Medical
Chin Swee Rd
time: 12.30pm to 2.30 pm, no appt require.
go and tiao your body and then take her herbs to try to conceive naturally if you want.
Cry all you want, do whatever you want and time will heal everything, trust me, the medicine you need now is time so no need to force yourself to sleep or do anything, just let it be first, your emptiness now will be fill up again, no need to think of how or anything, just let it be empty first, you will know what to do when the time is right, one morning when you suddenly wake up and feel like going around to look for answer or to see chinese physician whom you think can help, then do it. That's how we cope with loses and then let time heal it.
take this thread as a diary or anything, midnight wake up dun no who to talk to or what to do, come here and write out your feelings without any reservation and once you are tired, then go and sleep.
God is not cruel, god just has other plans for you, he has his reasons for doing that to you and trust me that you will be rewarded later for it, be strong, we might not know what's god reasons now for us not to conceive easily but i always leave my faith with him and let him plan my path.
have pm you my number, do call me if you need. first you must understand that this is no fault of you or whoever, there is always risk involve in all pregnancies including natural pregnancy, as high as 25%. If your foetus is healthy, you will be able to carry it to full term even though you eat cold stuff or unhealthy food but if your foetus was not a good foetus, it will eventually stop growing by itself no matter how you prevent it so it is not becos you do this or did not do that.
think postive and you now know that you can get pregnant one and some women tried many years to conceive and fully succeeded, after that first bb, the second one just comes naturally and easily, something like your womb system get a overhaul after the first pregnancy and your system becomes normal again for natural, so dun give up hope. try to conceive naturally after 1 or 2 cycle later, chances are there.
Go and see this chinese physician if you want.
Dr Tan siew buoy
thong Chai Medical
Chin Swee Rd
time: 12.30pm to 2.30 pm, no appt require.
go and tiao your body and then take her herbs to try to conceive naturally if you want.
Cry all you want, do whatever you want and time will heal everything, trust me, the medicine you need now is time so no need to force yourself to sleep or do anything, just let it be first, your emptiness now will be fill up again, no need to think of how or anything, just let it be empty first, you will know what to do when the time is right, one morning when you suddenly wake up and feel like going around to look for answer or to see chinese physician whom you think can help, then do it. That's how we cope with loses and then let time heal it.
take this thread as a diary or anything, midnight wake up dun no who to talk to or what to do, come here and write out your feelings without any reservation and once you are tired, then go and sleep.
God is not cruel, god just has other plans for you, he has his reasons for doing that to you and trust me that you will be rewarded later for it, be strong, we might not know what's god reasons now for us not to conceive easily but i always leave my faith with him and let him plan my path.
nanz,
a little of personal advise after doing the D&C, dun rush into doing the fET, you might be disappointed again, during D&C, they washed away your foetus, pregnancy sac and that incl a thin layer of your uterus linning so that means that for the next 1 mth, implantation might not be so good, that's why usually dr advise not to get pregnant for the next 3 mths, worried that even if pregnant, might have risk.
a little of personal advise after doing the D&C, dun rush into doing the fET, you might be disappointed again, during D&C, they washed away your foetus, pregnancy sac and that incl a thin layer of your uterus linning so that means that for the next 1 mth, implantation might not be so good, that's why usually dr advise not to get pregnant for the next 3 mths, worried that even if pregnant, might have risk.
Yvonne,
Thanks for ur advice. Rite now i am just very loss so maybe just blah blah blah.....really hope times will heal everything soon...Yeah, last nite when i cant sleep i just post in....actually now phyically i'm still ok, dun feel weak or anything, is the mental thing tat is torturing me...yes, i will just cry out and i dun dare to stay home alone now...when alone i tend to think here and there. Tat y, when hubby need to go back office and settle some work jus now, he bring me to my brother place. Think i will go back to work after next week, even though they give me 3 weeks MC.
Even now, i will still ask myself- Did i really lose the precious one, or am i jus dreaming....
Thanks for ur advice. Rite now i am just very loss so maybe just blah blah blah.....really hope times will heal everything soon...Yeah, last nite when i cant sleep i just post in....actually now phyically i'm still ok, dun feel weak or anything, is the mental thing tat is torturing me...yes, i will just cry out and i dun dare to stay home alone now...when alone i tend to think here and there. Tat y, when hubby need to go back office and settle some work jus now, he bring me to my brother place. Think i will go back to work after next week, even though they give me 3 weeks MC.
Even now, i will still ask myself- Did i really lose the precious one, or am i jus dreaming....
Yvonne,
I will think postively. Rite now still grieving over the loss....but i will tell myself nver give up....nothing matter to me now except for my hubby, family and baby-making....
Really thanks u girls for all the mental support...u all are really a great bunch of listeners.
I will think postively. Rite now still grieving over the loss....but i will tell myself nver give up....nothing matter to me now except for my hubby, family and baby-making....
Really thanks u girls for all the mental support...u all are really a great bunch of listeners.
nanz,
that's the way, treasure the one that you have and make it better, dun dwell on those that you lost or dun have, life becomes miserable and often you neglected those that are around you.
i thing that i gathered from some sisters here is that whenever you call KKIVF, the nurses there dun seem to check with your doctor on what is the step or advise for you before they confirm what you should do next, maybe before you make another appt, see your dr first and thru him to advise you on when to do it.
that's the way, treasure the one that you have and make it better, dun dwell on those that you lost or dun have, life becomes miserable and often you neglected those that are around you.
i thing that i gathered from some sisters here is that whenever you call KKIVF, the nurses there dun seem to check with your doctor on what is the step or advise for you before they confirm what you should do next, maybe before you make another appt, see your dr first and thru him to advise you on when to do it.
nanz,
you want to join me and pinpanter to thong chai next monday pm? we thought of a way to avoid heavy human traffic liao. maybe she can prescribe you with some herbs to take to build up your condition after the surgery. below are some of this physician profile, have a look, she is quite good in her field.
http://72.14.235.104/search?q=cache:MVb-5d51LaAJ:www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/92582/1/.html+Dr+Tan+Siew+Buoy&hl=en&gl=sg&ct=clnk&cd=8
http://woman.zaobao.com/pages/women020900.html
http://health.zaobao.com/pages2/chinese180501.html
http://www.thip-kx.org/new/20050627.htm
http://www.bookschina.com/1121840.htm
Tan Siew Buoy chinese character is (chen Qiu Mei)
you want to join me and pinpanter to thong chai next monday pm? we thought of a way to avoid heavy human traffic liao. maybe she can prescribe you with some herbs to take to build up your condition after the surgery. below are some of this physician profile, have a look, she is quite good in her field.
http://72.14.235.104/search?q=cache:MVb-5d51LaAJ:www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/92582/1/.html+Dr+Tan+Siew+Buoy&hl=en&gl=sg&ct=clnk&cd=8
http://woman.zaobao.com/pages/women020900.html
http://health.zaobao.com/pages2/chinese180501.html
http://www.thip-kx.org/new/20050627.htm
http://www.bookschina.com/1121840.htm
Tan Siew Buoy chinese character is (chen Qiu Mei)
nanz,
actually told by a few gynae to see TCM at thong chai if i am interested in TCM incl. Dr loh. reason told was thong chai is non commercialise, but that time, feel stubborn to take chinese herb so drag until only middle of this year then bo bian to take herb to try and also did not go to thong chai becos thought that is non-profit organisation, all thru donation ones and for me to go there and take those free consultation and free herbs like very paiseh mah but as long as you give donation (of whatever amt that you like) after each consultation, then dun feel so bad like snatching things with those old ppl lor but after a few visits, feel that alot of ppl of all kinds, rich or poor goes there and specified the dr that they want to see, so changed my mind that actually in thong chai there are alot of good and experience chinese physician, well certified and qualified.
above are my personal views, i dun take advertising fee from thong chai
actually told by a few gynae to see TCM at thong chai if i am interested in TCM incl. Dr loh. reason told was thong chai is non commercialise, but that time, feel stubborn to take chinese herb so drag until only middle of this year then bo bian to take herb to try and also did not go to thong chai becos thought that is non-profit organisation, all thru donation ones and for me to go there and take those free consultation and free herbs like very paiseh mah but as long as you give donation (of whatever amt that you like) after each consultation, then dun feel so bad like snatching things with those old ppl lor but after a few visits, feel that alot of ppl of all kinds, rich or poor goes there and specified the dr that they want to see, so changed my mind that actually in thong chai there are alot of good and experience chinese physician, well certified and qualified.
above are my personal views, i dun take advertising fee from thong chai
nanz,
oops forgot, you acutally mentioned that you saw TSB before for 2 mths and then give up right? actually waiting time is okay leh, not that bad leh except first visit liao. there is another sis that took her medicine for a year or so and then go and do IVF, got pregnant too, so maybe in your case, same thing lor, you got pregnant becos your body was well conditioned before the IVF? so do consider to take some "pu" again to tiao.
oops forgot, you acutally mentioned that you saw TSB before for 2 mths and then give up right? actually waiting time is okay leh, not that bad leh except first visit liao. there is another sis that took her medicine for a year or so and then go and do IVF, got pregnant too, so maybe in your case, same thing lor, you got pregnant becos your body was well conditioned before the IVF? so do consider to take some "pu" again to tiao.
Yvonne,
Yes, I nvr cancel the appt with Dr sadahna. This appt is suppose to be my 3rd follow up for bb, so told them dun cancel will still see her and ask her details of wat exactly happen. Cos no doctor and nurse advise us wat happen after the surgery...they ask me to stay inpatience for one nite, but i refuse. maybe they jus wan my gynae to advise me...she on leave and will be only be back next wk.
Yes, I nvr cancel the appt with Dr sadahna. This appt is suppose to be my 3rd follow up for bb, so told them dun cancel will still see her and ask her details of wat exactly happen. Cos no doctor and nurse advise us wat happen after the surgery...they ask me to stay inpatience for one nite, but i refuse. maybe they jus wan my gynae to advise me...she on leave and will be only be back next wk.
Yvonne,
Tks, but think will not go TCM as my SIL has visited a sinseh (in tampines not sure of the name)last nite and get for me some chinese herbs for my m/c. My mum and SIL has told me to come my brother place every AM in which my mum will help me to 'bu' my body lor. The sinseh oso good lah, ask my SIL to pass me the msg: If i dun stay happy and look up, no matter how much 'bu' i eat oso no use." So now have to 'see open'lor...
Awy, thanks for the suggestion.
Tks, but think will not go TCM as my SIL has visited a sinseh (in tampines not sure of the name)last nite and get for me some chinese herbs for my m/c. My mum and SIL has told me to come my brother place every AM in which my mum will help me to 'bu' my body lor. The sinseh oso good lah, ask my SIL to pass me the msg: If i dun stay happy and look up, no matter how much 'bu' i eat oso no use." So now have to 'see open'lor...
Awy, thanks for the suggestion.
Nanz,
The most important thing for you now is to rest. as to see drs be it chinese or gynea. you may wan to do it aft this "confininement period" rest you body and mind now. Don rush into anything yet. nothing is more important than your body condition before you step into another journey. again nothing is definite in this TTC issue. evryone will hv diffenrent reactions and result may varies. so dont lock your mind up. that will help you to calm down for the moment, and wt a calm mind you can make better decision.
The most important thing for you now is to rest. as to see drs be it chinese or gynea. you may wan to do it aft this "confininement period" rest you body and mind now. Don rush into anything yet. nothing is more important than your body condition before you step into another journey. again nothing is definite in this TTC issue. evryone will hv diffenrent reactions and result may varies. so dont lock your mind up. that will help you to calm down for the moment, and wt a calm mind you can make better decision.
Nanz,
Thanks dear. don think that you are at fault anymore. remember I told you abt the case of 38 weeks? so it can happen to anyone at any stage.
i'm doing a little better today. pass 2 days had been bad. couldn't do much thing by myself. now hb away for work, i hv to take care of my own meals.....
Thanks dear. don think that you are at fault anymore. remember I told you abt the case of 38 weeks? so it can happen to anyone at any stage.
i'm doing a little better today. pass 2 days had been bad. couldn't do much thing by myself. now hb away for work, i hv to take care of my own meals.....
Nanz,
thanks, I will be carefull. pls take care ok. drink some camomile tea to sooth your mind and relax. whenever you feel depress, do tak deep deep breath. if possible, don stay home alone. talk to hb. When knew my bb din grow I was v v dpress whenever I was alone. cry n cry. keep thinking y y y....
thanks, I will be carefull. pls take care ok. drink some camomile tea to sooth your mind and relax. whenever you feel depress, do tak deep deep breath. if possible, don stay home alone. talk to hb. When knew my bb din grow I was v v dpress whenever I was alone. cry n cry. keep thinking y y y....
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Renee,
Haven't been hearing from you for the past few days. Your MS must be bad huh? Take care hor...
Haven't been hearing from you for the past few days. Your MS must be bad huh? Take care hor...
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Renee,
so cham ah you....better take good care...stll must eat hor...your ah dot needs it...when are you seeing Dr Loh again?
I no MS yet...only got pimples on my back, and 1 under the jaw...also have tender nipples & painful breasts....eating & sleeping like a pig nowadays...10pm will feel sleepy liao
so cham ah you....better take good care...stll must eat hor...your ah dot needs it...when are you seeing Dr Loh again?
I no MS yet...only got pimples on my back, and 1 under the jaw...also have tender nipples & painful breasts....eating & sleeping like a pig nowadays...10pm will feel sleepy liao
Ad,
seeing my idol on coming tue. my face has many breakouts too. v v oil skin. really cant tahan man. you so good gal. I feel zz too. but will tong all the way till i finish my tv shows. very bad hor?
Guess what? I don like to eat nest!! only like to drink soy milk and eat bean curd. stupid me.
seeing my idol on coming tue. my face has many breakouts too. v v oil skin. really cant tahan man. you so good gal. I feel zz too. but will tong all the way till i finish my tv shows. very bad hor?
Guess what? I don like to eat nest!! only like to drink soy milk and eat bean curd. stupid me.
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Renee,
the marine Parade sinseh told me to start eating birdnest only after 1st trimester leh...bean curd has "shi gao" dun overeat too....
i also want to "dong" to watch tv, but come 10pm, i will be so sleepy till i have to sleep...last nite slept from 7pm-9+, then woke up 1 hour & went to zzzzz again till 7am this morning...really like a pig....
the marine Parade sinseh told me to start eating birdnest only after 1st trimester leh...bean curd has "shi gao" dun overeat too....
i also want to "dong" to watch tv, but come 10pm, i will be so sleepy till i have to sleep...last nite slept from 7pm-9+, then woke up 1 hour & went to zzzzz again till 7am this morning...really like a pig....
Ad,
yesterday went to marine parade to bring herb and accidentally went to your shop that you see sinseh, was looking around to see if can identify you but none looks like got 34D leh
and the sinseh very rich leh, overheard his wife telling one patient that her son is studying master in states for 4 years cost $600K and somemore said ask the son must come back after study if not sell the house or something, sounded very rich leh i kaypoh becos waited very long just for them to gather the herbs, too many aunties kept coming to bring this and that.
yesterday went to marine parade to bring herb and accidentally went to your shop that you see sinseh, was looking around to see if can identify you but none looks like got 34D leh
and the sinseh very rich leh, overheard his wife telling one patient that her son is studying master in states for 4 years cost $600K and somemore said ask the son must come back after study if not sell the house or something, sounded very rich leh
i kaypoh becos waited very long just for them to gather the herbs, too many aunties kept coming to bring this and that.renee,ad,
must remember what i said before about eating bird nest, i repeat, i fed my sis with bird nest every day when she is pregnant (doing experiment on her, cos was told by another friend that her bb gal complexion very nice becos of birdnest )and true enough my sis baby comes out with rosy cheeks, nice complexion and no skin problem, like milk rashes or any rashes, just mild heat rash when very warm, so i think that is the magic of bird nest.
so after 1st trimeter, eat lots of bird nest!
must remember what i said before about eating bird nest, i repeat, i fed my sis with bird nest every day when she is pregnant (doing experiment on her, cos was told by another friend that her bb gal complexion very nice becos of birdnest )and true enough my sis baby comes out with rosy cheeks, nice complexion and no skin problem, like milk rashes or any rashes, just mild heat rash when very warm, so i think that is the magic of bird nest.
so after 1st trimeter, eat lots of bird nest!
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Yvonne,
what time were you there? i was there around 10+-11+am. you went lunch time is it? I REALLY DUN HAVE 34D la!!! who told you i'm a 34D???!!!
what time were you there? i was there around 10+-11+am. you went lunch time is it? I REALLY DUN HAVE 34D la!!! who told you i'm a 34D???!!!
Ad,
ya, normally ppl only start to eat nest aft 1st trimester. the reason being that nest is very ex and 1st 3 months not so stable. so in order not to waste the nest, they will advise us to take only aft 1st trimester. taking it now, nothing wrong. Just that we start it earlier to "BU" the bb. my sinseh also told me if I can. try to eat now.
ya, normally ppl only start to eat nest aft 1st trimester. the reason being that nest is very ex and 1st 3 months not so stable. so in order not to waste the nest, they will advise us to take only aft 1st trimester. taking it now, nothing wrong. Just that we start it earlier to "BU" the bb. my sinseh also told me if I can. try to eat now.
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Yvonne//renee,
thanks, will remember
thanks, will remember
ad,
i was there from 9+ till 10:20 or 10:30am, must have miss you, i was sitting at the counter, high chair waiting and watching the "china ?" man gathering the herbs but dun think you were there lor, cos that time not many ppl waiting to see sinseh and none fit in your description.
i was there from 9+ till 10:20 or 10:30am, must have miss you, i was sitting at the counter, high chair waiting and watching the "china ?" man gathering the herbs but dun think you were there lor, cos that time not many ppl waiting to see sinseh and none fit in your description.
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Yvonne, think i went in just after you left....when i went in, there were 2 little girls with their mom infron of me...and some old folks at the front....
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Yvonne,
my msn is [email protected]. I'm always online...well...when i'm not zzzzz-ing that is.....
my msn is [email protected]. I'm always online...well...when i'm not zzzzz-ing that is.....
Yvonne,
[email protected]
[email protected]
amateur_ivfian
New Member
Yvonne,
Yes, still seeing him. he gave me a pack of an tai yao for this sat & ask me to see him again next sat.
Yes, still seeing him. he gave me a pack of an tai yao for this sat & ask me to see him again next sat.
Ladies,
Cham liao..me thought i am ok, but dunno why i still cry over dinner time. I was thinking now eat so good oso useless baby is gone...how...when can i get over....i really very miserable now. Sorry to post sad news on this thread...but only when i online tok tok i feel at ease...now still at my brother place dun dare to go home...told my hubby during the preggie period, he was working late most of the nite, so most of the time when i alone at home, i just tok to baby or serve the net...now going home is like going to hell...i will jus think of my baby..the morning milk time and nite time supper...how...i really miss baby...
Cham liao..me thought i am ok, but dunno why i still cry over dinner time. I was thinking now eat so good oso useless baby is gone...how...when can i get over....i really very miserable now. Sorry to post sad news on this thread...but only when i online tok tok i feel at ease...now still at my brother place dun dare to go home...told my hubby during the preggie period, he was working late most of the nite, so most of the time when i alone at home, i just tok to baby or serve the net...now going home is like going to hell...i will jus think of my baby..the morning milk time and nite time supper...how...i really miss baby...