Discovered my husband is Bisexual

Shall I confront the guys mentioned

  • No

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Consult family lawyer

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    1
  • Poll closed .

affranto

New Member
Hi

We are happily married for 20 years.My husband will come and fetch me from work daily and we will have our dinner together everyday. He doesnt socialize alot and we spent alot of time together. We do not have any kids.

On weekends, my hubby will always be in his studyroom to surf websites and to read news.

I realized that my husband was suddenly very moody and suddenly became temperamental. I talked to him and he assured that he is ok.

By chance, I logged into his desktop and realized that my husband is dating other married guys. They have even met up in a hotel for fun in the afternoon for a couple of times. Reading through the exchanges,my husband will use his lunch time to meet up other bi-married guys or single gays. I have gotten all these details from the email exchange from the BW forum.I immediately checked on the the history of the websites he visited and gathered these data.


My heart shattered and I was deeply hurt. The hubby which I trusted most and believe in has actually betrayed me out totally. My hubby still dont know that I have discovered the secrets. I am lost and I still love my hubby alot and we are going for our vacation soon. I am torned apart.

Should I confront my hubby or should I seek a marriage counselor for advice.


There is this forum called www.blowingwind.org (BW forum)

1)The married guy (41 yrs old, 176 cm, 98 kg) will contact my hubby for fun. His BW ID is juzzmee. I set up an account to chat with him and he leaked out his affairs and one of them is with my husband.

2)This guy kept pestering my husband for sex. His Grindr account is T.H . His name is Tom.He even sent his naked pics to my husband.Realized that he is in my husband's facebook. His Facebook ID is Tom Heksen.

3) This guy is in his mid twenties. Chatting with him, he is such a messy guy coiled in messy relationships. His Facebook ID is Tony Machida. (Picture 5). While chatting, he revealed that he wished that my husband is his boyfriend.

Latest discoveries as at June 2018.

These guys recently texted my husband for sex. I managed to chat abit with them.

4) This guy is call Clarence Lee. His facebook is Clarence Lee but he has changed to Optimistic Mind. He is staying in Buangkok. His IG is clairylee (Freedom). His chasabl profile is Clairy (Mr Lonely). He is from Kuching. He has been chatting with my hubby from Year 2016.

I managed to post as a married guy and chatted with him, he said he teaches Dharma and conducts small dharma classes(wondering is it true). Then he asked me for sex. I pretend and said I know my husband. Clarence said that he has met my husband for lunch for afew times and they communicate often and also share songs in a singing app. The singing app is call Huang Ge and his ID is 906871. He sings terribly by the way.This disgusting Clarence even told me of his fling in onsen in Japan with a married guy. He even brought his dad to go onsen. But as his dad is there, he cant have fun with guys on the first night. I cant imagine a person who preach and teaches Dharma but seduces married guys to break up families. Karma will catch up with you.

As at today, I know Clarence is still secretly texting my hubby. I have evidence. The best is yet to come.


I really hate all these male home wreakers. I am posting these pictures so all sisters here can be aware of all these SLUTS.

I am really torn up and sadden by all these affairs. My heart keep sobbing everything I have to trace and dig information on my husband.

My hubby has since deleted away his SECRET Facebook which have all the above sluts in it.

SPIDY
 

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JL8118

Active Member
You sound like one of my friend, whom facing the same issue as her hubby recently. Probably different is the age between the both of you. She's 43, and been married for 16 years with no kids as well. Their sex life is normal also. The main issue for her not having kids is mainly her health issue. Her hubby is well aware of it and also don't mind about it. They planning to adopt one last year, till she found out about her hubby case.

Not sure what site he visited though, but seems some gay forum. She too discovered her hubby engaged another man for sexual intimacy. And not only once, but few times. She even engaged a PI to find out, and got those evidence.

When she told us, we all were shocked, as they both appear very loving with one another. And had almost all time together except during when he's working. He's a 100% best hubby to her, and funny is, their sexual life was good too.

For you and hubby, how's the sex life for both of you? Normal like dating time?

Will suggest to have a talk with him. Or perhaps hinting him in another way. Think that the friend I spoke of, is your friend. And she told you about her issue. So talked to your hubby, saying your friend facing such issue, and see how he's reaction.

Some are just 'curious' or just being 'playful'. It may be just for fun. But of course if he can't 'kick' such habit, then you will really have to think carefully. To carry on with the marriage, or to divorce... Also another way (if he agree), is to consult a marriage counsellor.
 

affranto

New Member
Hi JL8118

Thanks for the reply. I am deeply touched and grateful. For our sexual life, we seldom have intimacy.

I will try to find a suitable timing to talk and clarify with him.

Appreciate it alot
 

JL8118

Active Member
Hi JL8118

Thanks for the reply. I am deeply touched and grateful. For our sexual life, we seldom have intimacy.

I will try to find a suitable timing to talk and clarify with him.

Appreciate it alot
You are welcome. Best of luck...
 

johntan68

Member
Hi JL8118

Thanks for the reply. I am deeply touched and grateful. For our sexual life, we seldom have intimacy.

I will try to find a suitable timing to talk and clarify with him.

Appreciate it alot
This can also due to sexual orientation disorder and need to see a specialize psychiatrist in this field. there are only a handful of them in Singapore, you can google to find.
 

affranto

New Member
Dear John @johntan68

Thanks for your advice. I feel that my hubby's case is not sexual orientation disorder. Those guys mentioned before kept pestering my hubby. I went to the extent to set up a "Blowing Wind" and Line Account to chat with the other married guy.

They are all doing behind their wife's back. This is hurting. This guy still wanted to ask for threesome. Just so disappointed.

Regards
Spidy
 
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affranto

New Member
Dear Sisters in this forum

I have been trying to stay strong after knowing my husband is BISEXUAL. Their irresponsibilities, irrational behaviour have brought pain, anguish, hurt and betrayal to us. Hope not bringing back any dieases or virus to us and families.

I have managed to get hold of afew Bi-Married chat groups links where these married guys will meet each other for fun. I also tracked down by hubby's Blowing wind ID too. Its definitely a very low morale exercise to go through as its so disheartening.

1) Please go through and see what our husbands are doing behind our back. (SIGH...SOB...)
https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/74786-married-for-married/
https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/33159-discreet-bi-curious-guys/
https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/440-seeking-bi-married-man-for-discreet-fun-compiled/

2) These are the profiles and pictures which are bi-married guys/gays whom my hubby had fun with (Pic 2,4,5 & 4). You can see those disgusting messages which they sent to each other. (VOMITING and COUGHING MY HEART OUT)


3) https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/67794-north-~-woodlands-admiralty-sembawang-yishun/?page=248&tab=comments#comment-2043211


Regards
Spidy
 
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p_eppermint

Member
for the sake of your health, pls go and see a doc and get yourself thoroughly checked ASAP. gays are one of the main carriers of sexually transmitted diseases. take care.
 

affranto

New Member
for the sake of your health, pls go and see a doc and get yourself thoroughly checked ASAP. gays are one of the main carriers of sexually transmitted diseases. take care.

Hi p-eppermint

Thanks for your concern. I will do a full body check when I am back in SG. Greatly appreciate your care Sis.

Regards
Spidy
 
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p_eppermint

Member
i don't think you should put up with this anymore. from what you've been sharing, it seems to be getting from bad to worse and you appear to be more frantic by the day. at the end of the day, your husband has cheated on you and that is a fact. you even have evidence so i don't know what's stopping you from confronting him. perhaps if you speak about it, things may turn out for the better instead of just carrying on with life as per normal while your hubby continues his bisexual activities behind you. this will only add to your unhappiness and could possibly escalate into a situation much worse than now. suggest you speak with your husband asap and let him know that you are aware of this matter. he may even need professional help and if so, it is best not to delay. if your husband still loves you, i believe you both will be able to work things out tgt. this may just be a short term thrill or passing phase for him.
 

affranto

New Member
i don't think you should put up with this anymore. from what you've been sharing, it seems to be getting from bad to worse and you appear to be more frantic by the day. at the end of the day, your husband has cheated on you and that is a fact. you even have evidence so i don't know what's stopping you from confronting him. perhaps if you speak about it, things may turn out for the better instead of just carrying on with life as per normal while your hubby continues his bisexual activities behind you. this will only add to your unhappiness and could possibly escalate into a situation much worse than now. suggest you speak with your husband asap and let him know that you are aware of this matter. he may even need professional help and if so, it is best not to delay. if your husband still loves you, i believe you both will be able to work things out tgt. this may just be a short term thrill or passing phase for him.
Hi p-eppermint

Thanks for your reply. I have hinted to my husband on this issue by saying that my friend have discovered his hubby's sexual orientation and preferences. He is very calm and cool about it. He replied that he also heard alot on this matters too.

I further probed him that I discovered some gay and bi-married guy details in his desktop. He kept quiet for awhile and informed me that he is straight and only love me. He claimed that he dont know why there is such websites in his history.

This is such a lousy lie and he is dishonest. I feel very hurt by his attitude.

I also discovered more dirt while trying to link up what I have found so far.

Praying to God to give me strength to tide over this storm.

Regards
Spidy
 
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Emma Kim

New Member
Hello Affranto. You must have been so hurt after hearing your husband's reply. I think the best way now is to see a marriage counsellor and see how things go. I hope you will stay strong and get through this. Take care.
 

p_eppermint

Member
Hi p-eppermint

Thanks for your reply. I have hinted to my husband on this issue by saying that my friend have discovered his hubby's sexual orientation and preferences. He is very calm and cool about it. He replied that he also heard alot on this matters too.

I further probed him that I discovered some gay and bi-married guy details in his desktop. He kept quiet for awhile and informed me that he is straight and only love me. He claimed that he dont know why there is such websites in his history.

This is such a lousy lie and he is dishonest. I feel very hurt by his attitude.

I also discovered more dirt while trying to link up what I have found so far.

Praying to God to give me strength to tide over this storm.

Regards
Affranto
do stay strong and take care. hope everything works out fine for you eventually.
 

jo_tadd

New Member
Hi Affranto

This is the link to a previous thread I share some experiences. I hope it helps you somehow.

I think to an extent, God is good because he opens your eye and let you see the real person your husband is. You need to consider the dangers you are facing or exposing your children to.

I used to be like you, I would wait on msn and impersonate my ex husband, try to trap and dig as much information as possible when I stumble upon the gay websites he was visiting and him webcam with them, send emails of his gross pictures to them ... That was before he refused to admit that he never met up with them.

His issue was, he was sexually abused by his uncle. Hence, he somewhat hated these people and love to entice them. He claimed that he would arrange orgy and sex parties but never meet up with them. Until I got some info about a few guys he actually have sex with. Actually only 1 but on a few occasions and he readily admitted his sexual encounters with a few gays.

I used to think those men who enticed him were wrong but seriously he was a willing party and he chose to do what he did. I even confronted a guy only to be scolded in return by him. I'm telling you from experience, all that heartache ain't gonna worth it because it only makes you more miserable and depressed.

I suggested counseling because that seems like the only option available but seriously counseling only works when the party involved is open to it and willing to change. That is like he wants to do it himself, not because he was caught and not for the sake of his wife or family, his children. That is only temporal. And there are also other problems involved ... To put it simply, this gay thing he had back then, it was like he was so obsessed with it and put time and effort in it until it seems almost impossible to extricate himself from it.

I am not asking you to give him the death sentence but it would do yourself justice as well as the children to demand some answers from him, honest upfront answers because if he is single, he can fool around all he wants but he is not.

I hope it helps.
 

affranto

New Member
Hi Affranto

This is the link to a previous thread I share some experiences. I hope it helps you somehow.

I think to an extent, God is good because he opens your eye and let you see the real person your husband is. You need to consider the dangers you are facing or exposing your children to.

I used to be like you, I would wait on msn and impersonate my ex husband, try to trap and dig as much information as possible when I stumble upon the gay websites he was visiting and him webcam with them, send emails of his gross pictures to them ... That was before he refused to admit that he never met up with them.

His issue was, he was sexually abused by his uncle. Hence, he somewhat hated these people and love to entice them. He claimed that he would arrange orgy and sex parties but never meet up with them. Until I got some info about a few g
Hi Affranto

This is the link to a previous thread I share some experiences. I hope it helps you somehow.

I think to an extent, God is good because he opens your eye and let you see the real person your husband is. You need to consider the dangers you are facing or exposing your children to.

I used to be like you, I would wait on msn and impersonate my ex husband, try to trap and dig as much information as possible when I stumble upon the gay websites he was visiting and him webcam with them, send emails of his gross pictures to them ... That was before he refused to admit that he never met up with them.

His issue was, he was sexually abused by his uncle. Hence, he somewhat hated these people and love to entice them. He claimed that he would arrange orgy and sex parties but never meet up with them. Until I got some info about a few guys he actually have sex with. Actually only 1 but on a few occasions and he readily admitted his sexual encounters with a few gays.

I used to think those men who enticed him were wrong but seriously he was a willing party and he chose to do what he did. I even confronted a guy only to be scolded in return by him. I'm telling you from experience, all that heartache ain't gonna worth it because it only makes you more miserable and depressed.

I suggested counseling because that seems like the only option available but seriously counseling only works when the party involved is open to it and willing to change. That is like he wants to do it himself, not because he was caught and not for the sake of his wife or family, his children. That is only temporal. And there are also other problems involved ... To put it simply, this gay thing he had back then, it was like he was so obsessed with it and put time and effort in it until it seems almost impossible to extricate himself from it.

I am not asking you to give him the death sentence but it would do yourself justice as well as the children to demand some answers from him, honest upfront answers because if he is single, he can fool around all he wants but he is not.

I hope it helps.
uys he actually have sex with. Actually only 1 but on a few occasions and he readily admitted his sexual encounters with a few gays.

I used to think those men who enticed him were wrong but seriously he was a willing party and he chose to do what he did. I even confronted a guy only to be scolded in return by him. I'm telling you from experience, all that heartache ain't gonna worth it because it only makes you more miserable and depressed.

I suggested counseling because that seems like the only option available but seriously counseling only works when the party involved is open to it and willing to change. That is like he wants to do it himself, not because he was caught and not for the sake of his wife or family, his children. That is only temporal. And there are also other problems involved ... To put it simply, this gay thing he had back then, it was like he was so obsessed with it and put time and effort in it until it seems almost impossible to extricate himself from it.

I am not asking you to give him the death sentence but it would do yourself justice as well as the children to demand some answers from him, honest upfront answers because if he is single, he can fool around all he wants but he is not.

I hope it helps.
Dear Jo_Tadd

Appreciate your advice. You are such a strong woman. I must learn to be like you. Its really devastating and emotionally torture.

I dig and found out more dirt which I am going to share with all sisters here. All these man sluts home wreakers are going overboard.

Sigh

Regards
Spidy
 
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Archy

New Member
Cheating be it with the opposite sex or the same sex is bad. I have a friend whose currently in the midst of pursuing divorce as his wife cheats on him with her boss sexually as well. His anguish, disappointed and sad face was unforgettable when the PI showed him all the evidences. The wife spent all his money on that guy while he had to scrap by for himself and the children. I can understand it's a sad and frustrating process.

There are many reasons to why straight men, or married men went to engage in same sex actions. Was it because he is more open? Or he is sexually frustrated or bored with the same sexual activities and wanted to explore something more? Here are some recent threads on their views.

https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/94609-a-straightbicurious-guys-perspective/
https://www.blowingwind.io/forum/topic/90652-what-are-the-bi-married-guys-need/

Ask him the same question then, what would he feel if you went to a swinger site (https://undertable.live/) and engage in similar activities like him. Would he feel betrayed or not.

Unless he and you are in an open relationship, what he's doing regardless is wrong. Either get him together to fix this together, or break the relationship with him altogether. For the good of yourself.
 

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