Elle,
Heheeeee…13 Sept is the birthday of my sister…such a beautiful coincidence
Miraclebaby
You are absolutely right, you have my support to say a big NO. Actually everytime I hear such things happen, I get angry because no one is allowed to take others for granted like that. It means that they don't care about your health. Just remember that the minute you leave the co, no one will give a damn about any ex-staff.
Sunflower,
Thanks a lot Sunflower
In my eyes, everyone has the potential to conceive naturally as life is so unpredictable, you have it too ok sister
Of course I don't mind sharing. As I am always very longwinded, I shall write my issues and propsed solutions in point forms (pardon me if it could still be long) so that you can find it easier to sieve out what is relevant and what is not. I understand not every point might work as every one has different issues but do use the relevant points and some for reference k.
My fertility issues:
I have both ovulation problem (hormonal) and egg quality issues. However, it is difficult to pinpoint what could have caused the poor egg quality. Very often, its is the hormonal imbalance that causes it and other times, it could also be the egg itself that is of poor quality . I have seen many gynaes, no one can tell me in concrete term if its hormonal or egg quality but I believe it could also be a chicken and egg issue. So when we have an egg quality issue, it the key culprit could well be our hormones. Of course, it could also be the egg itself. As I have both these issues, I tried to work on both. Sorry for the long post but I try to explain the causes first than later and the possible solutions.
For hormonal causes:
In both western medicine and tcm, any egg quality problem is often linked to hormonal issues and link of yin and yang balance. Western drs call it hormonal problem while tcm call it yin and yang out of balance. So very often, its not that the egg itself is no good, it’s the mechanism that produces the egg that is not working in sync. If hormones are out of whack, the the egg ovulated that month could be of low poor quality, it will affect lining, luteal phase and the whole cycle's performance. Hormonal causes can be resolved.
For egg issue:
If our body lacks certain vitamins and minerals, our eggs will become of low quality. Also, like our skin, it is also a function of how long we have lived. It its essentially like our skin. If we lack vitamin E, our skin will age prematurely and so will our eggs. In terms of the passing of time, think of the skin of a baby's and that of a woman in the 30s (like me) that has been exposed to insectides, pesticides, stress, exposure to radiation and 2nd hand smoke.
The good news is that for both hormonal and egg issues, there are ways to improve it and to drastically slow down the effect of the passing of time.
The mechanism is the complex interaction of our hormones (there will be food to correct imbalance in these three described below) :
1. Estradiol (estrogen or the yin espect that the tcm drs call it), Estrogen governs the first part of our cycle. With an optimum level of estrogen, our body can than produce a good egg, Estrogen also enables the egg to ovulate on time every month, Estrogen also helps to build our lining in the first half of the cycle (before ovulation part). When all these are in sync, the progesterone for the 2nd part of the cycle (after ovulation) will then be enough.
2. Prolactin (stress hormone that produces milk that interferes with ovulation and egg quality). Too high is no good as it interferes with ovulation right from the start of the cycle. Means its like the enemy of estradiol and good ovulation.
3. Progesterone (the yang aspect that maintains lining and high temperature after ovulation). A good level of progesterone is often a function of how well ovulation itself happened in the first part, meaning if estrogen has done its job in the earlier part of the cycle.
My clinical obeservation after taking bbt for 2 years and during ivf to prove I have those issues:
1. Irregular cycle from 25 to 36 days (hormonal imbalance)
2. Late ovulation sometimes at day 25 (hormonal imbalance). When ovulation happens too late, the lining gets a bit too old for implantation. But this is a general rule of thumb. I have heard of a lady who ovulates on day 22 and gave birth to twins.
3. Very thin lining. Many times, at most only 6mm just before and after ovulation. Found out when I was monitoring my ovulation with LC Cheng. (hormonal problem that resulted in a poor quality egg ovulated that resulted in poor lining. According to Dr Cheng).
4. My luteal phase can be short as 9 days to 10 days on average.
5. During one cycle that I monitored, I had a 10mm follicle on day 11. And on day 13 when I did the scan, I already ovulated. It meant that that egg probably ovulated when it was only 15mm. Such a small egg will be killed by the sperm eventually. It meant that it was a poor quality egg and what caused me to ovulate so early was probably an out of sync cycle that also produced a poor quality egg). I believe I have had several such cycles.
6. During ivf, with all the hormonal support and stimulation, my fertilitsation rate was just 50% and when I spoke to embryologist, she told me my egg quality is not great, she described it as "space" or "vacuums" on my eggs. (my egg quality issue) As a layman, I imagined it be my skin at 30 plus vs my skin when I was just born. After the 50% of the embryos were fertilised, they did not survive long enough to do transfer.
7. Also, my ivf day3 result showed that the level of estradiol just barely made it to the minimal level (my estradiol is too low), prolactin too high, day 21 progesterone level showed that I do ovulate but progesterone level also borderline on the low end.
Therefore, I confirmed I have both hormonal and egg issue (from what embryologist told me). I saw Dr Zou and she commented before that I am yin deficient. But she did not comment further. My experience is usually tcm drs will not fully describe our issues as they worry that we might actually self medicate to resolve the problem and that can be dangerous. But from her acu point positions for me which I counter checked with a tcm book I bought, its really that I am deficient in yin energy (let me know if you all want the section and I will pdf it and load here if can). This is tallies with my day 3 low estradiol evidence. So my suggestion to the sisters here if your cycles are irregular, try to find out your worst enemy, are you yin deficient or yang deficient, blood stagnant, liver stagnant or damp? Sometimes, it’s a combination of a few issues. But there are some food that are good for a few issues at the same time. Similarly, some forms of exercises, relaxation methods are good for all conditions. Try to ask Dr Zou what is your key problem. Ask casually such as what is my "xu1" (lacking in in tcm terms) or "my luteal phase very short, I must be kidney yang deficient".
Also, I also want to highlight this very very very important point. That for actions we take to improve our fertility, do them for the seek of fertility and also for our own wellbeing (health). Don't just do it for fertility as many times, out of 10 things that we do, maybe only two things will work. And if we keep having fertility in mind, we will be so disappointed that every month when AF comes, we will feel cheated and in chinese, zi4 bao4 zi4 qi4 and give up altogether. Take this mentality, do the healthy things and take the healthy food to better ourselves, improve our health and with the bonus of prospect of improving fertility. The beautiful thing about reality is healthiness is directly correlated with fertility. If pregnant after doing all that, of course the best, but if month after month, AF still reports, of course can adjust the healthy regime abit but do them anyway, for ourselves, to maintain our youth and for people who love us. Do the healthy regime on a long term basis, not just for child bearing.
*****All these help to balance hormones and improve egg quality********
1. Do some form of exercise. In tcm terms, a body without exercise is like a pool of still water that will smell bad over time. Moderate exercise will help to get the blood to flow there it should and prevent aging of all organs including ovaries and eggs. Best form of exercises for fertility are light cycling, swimming (after swimming, get out from your wet swim wear soon to avoid yeast infection), slow jog or brisk walking and yoga. Avoid running marathons as it diverts too much blood to heart and away from uterus. I slow jog once a week for 30 minutes and yoga for 45 mins twice a week.
- I also meditate whenever I feel stress accumulating. It helps to bring on peace and make me less angry with what is making me angry and clears the mind. It can make someone happier with the world. Have a nice little corner at home with a ipod or cd player to escape to and meditate if necessary. If cannot sit still to meditate, "meditate" upon the stars and moon also can.
2. Food wise,
- Eat wholemeal whenever possible but as I eat outside, for rice, no choice, eat white rice. Eat wholegrain bread whenever possible. Good for health and fertility at same time. A study showed that refined food such as white bread and sugar reduces
- Try to eat green vege for one meal everyday. Lunch or dinner does not matter, green leafy vege is also good to prevent colon cancer and provides the purest form of folic acid for us. Spinach is the best and a rich source of iron for the lining.
- Try to eat yogurt often, for full fat yogurt, its paul brand from ntuc. It does not taste great, so I add fruit pieces to eat. Yogurt prevents colon cancer, promotes healthy digestive system to allow us to absorb nutrients better and also prevents yeast infection that is no good for fertility. Also good source of calcium. If don't like yogurt, can be probotics pill supplement from pharmacy. Not expensive to eat on long term basis.
- Don't eat low fat/skimmed/non fact dairy as they have high concentration of prolaction that interferes with ovulation as said earlier. Substitute with all full cream products. Full cream diary products are good for our eggs. But moderation please.
- Don't eat animal fats (with exception of full cream products said earlier), trim them all off. They are bad for our heart and also bad for fertility as they can lead to high blood pressure that obstructs blood flow.
- Eat blackmores multivits that comes with fish oil capulse. This vitamin provides all the nutrients to help with ovulation and egg quality. If don't like blackmores, try centrum but don't forget to top-up with a fish oil that not just help to lower blood pressure but helps with egg quality and beautiful skin. Also eat Co10 (blackmores sell standalone Co10) that helps with egg quality. I believe it can help to fill up the "space" in eggs
- Fruits can do wonders to hormonal imbalance and also good for egg quality with all the natural form of vits. Don't just eat the vits. During lunch, I try to drink a cup of fruit juice and at night, I eat fruits before 9pm. As as result, I filfull 5 servings of fruits and vega a day. Eat lots of avocado, it has vitamin B6 that can balance hormones and increases progesterone. It also has good fats to reduce the bad fats in our body. Eat lots of berries (strawberry, mulberries, blueberries). I cannot emphasize more the benefits of berries. Its antioxidant level is great for egg quality and slows down aging of our eggs. Must use fruit wash to remove pesticides. Important.
- For those low in estradiol, eat apples and beet roots. (there is this ABC mixed fruit drink at fruit stores). I drink this drink about twice a week upon the start of menses to when I see egg white cervical mucus to help build estrogen level.
- I also drink wheat grass with green apple to detox and nourish my weak yin energy.
- I also eat red and black beans that are good for both yin and yang kidney deficiency. Boil red bean dessert soup and black bean pork rib soup to eat.
- After you think you have ovulated, eat or drink more avocade shake (ask for with sugar and milk as they use HL milk that is made from skimmed milk powder).
For the above food, don't eat everyday, eat interchangingly as we also don't want to flip the hormones to another end.
- Eat one teaspoon of bee pollen every morning before food and drink. Put under tongue and let it melt. After 15 minutes, Eat a capule of 1000mg of royal jelly. Only eat food after 15 minutes. A combination of bee pollen and Royal jelly is known to regulate an irregular menstrual cycle. Bee pollen has all the vitamins that men every known and improves general wellbeing and immunity. Royal Jelly improve egg quality and balance hormones and also promote general wellbeing. My hubby eats a 1000mg of royal jelly every morning too. It is known to improve sperm count and quality. He still eats it now for general well being. Stop these two when pregnant.
- Every day, sleep by 11pm or earlier. Our liver starts to detox our bodies at 10pm and the work ends at 6am the next morning (makes sense why we go pooing in the morning right
) If we sleep late, our liver has to work twice as had and liver is an important organ that promotes healthy hormones for fertility. Liver health is directly linked to estrogen and progesterone production. An overworked liver compromises fertility and health over long term.
- Noticed I did not eat tcm but it you believe that it will help you, by all means but at the same time, also must eat healthy. For me, no tcm as I tried it and it did not work for me plus I know by going to see tcm every week, I will be very stressed with time arrangement and such that it could overwhelm my benefits. But if it works for you, continue with it.
3. Mentality wise:
- As said, when doing all the above, don't have fertility as the only end in mind. Do them still even if not pregnant immediately. Do them just because we want to be healthy.
- Try to distract from ourselves from ttcing by indulging in hobbies or making our loved ones happy. Such that in case AF comes, still have something else to look forward to. Don’t attach our life worth to how many kids we have. Attach it to how to live to the best of our abilities.
- Don’t set time limit for ourselves, such as by when when when must be parent or have how many kids. Man proposes, god disposes, do our best, take the mentality that as long as we do our best, we can answer to ourselves and our hubbies, that is what is important. Whether AF reports or is not as important as that fact that we can answer to our own conscience. Believe me, its not that I conceived that I can say this, fact is I always have this thinking since writing here as it can lead to more peace and happiness. I had that mentality after I failed the ivf. In fact, after the failed ivf, I felt liberated as I before I did the ivf, I questioned myself if I have indeed tried my best. Keep going, whether it is we want to try another cycle or do naturally, keep going and have a life at the same time. Rest for some time if need to recharge. It is only when we don't set limit that we can keep going and not feel jaded.
- Refresh the marriage every now and then. I can see many sisters here doing that already such that we will not feel such a big vacuum created by the absence of a child. Because the marriage is already so fulfulling
- Very very important to reduce stress, stress hurts liver and hurts fertility and interferes with ovulation and egg quality. Exercise, recreation, good nutritional balance and a healthy mentality keeps stress in check. Fertility challenge and stress creates a catch 22 situation. Try to find a way to break the cycle. First and foremost way, don't set time limit for ourselves.
4. Health check wise, just want to mention that its useful when see gynae next time to ask for a HVS (high virginal swap) to check for an possible infection in the virginal that could be affecting natural conception if you have not done one. Also, relook at day 3 test to see what it says. Remember, a high FSH may not mean diminish ovary reserve. It could also mean hormonal imbalance that can be corrected. If estradiol and progestrone not so ideal, check out my food list.
** I also wear slippers at home to conserve the "chi" within the body.
5. Sperm quality wise, I would say it’s a lot easier to deal with as men do not have so many hormones to deal with What I noticed about my hubby is that his good sperm quality report deteriorated noticably when he become very busy with work. So stress is definitely bad for them. If they smoke, ask them to reduce or better still, stop. I also noticed that when my hubby resumes exercising (best is can exercise together as a couple), he is happier. He also thinks the royal jelly helped him to be healthier. And healthier also means better sperms.
Sunny, for myself, I did my first scan over the weekend, baby is about 5 weeks and I can roughly see a yolk sac and a pole with the help from gynae and his given my duphaston pill (a form of progestrone) as I spotted and it cannot be decided if its implantation or not. So everything checked liao.
Sorry for the long post as I want to cover all relevant aspects to avoid misleading.
Rostrum
You have my support sister and please don’t mention, it’s a very very small gesture I can do. And I respect you a lot for knowing your own emotions. Not everyone can do it. Its perfectly normal to feel sad about certain aspects of our lives. And what I respect about you and many sisters here is that you are finding ways to work around it and not sit there and sulk all the time. Its also correct not to show our saddness in front of not well meaning people who will use it to make us feel beaten. Like I said last time, for people out to insult me, I will tell them I am not sure if I want kids. I think its necessary to not to make ourselves become topics for their lunches. So its perfectly normal to hid sadness in front of people you deem necessary. For myself, only my family and some of close friends know about my fertility challenge. Of couse you girls and those sisters whom I have met before know
Continue to divulge only to those you can trust.
Yes, go for mediation, it’s a great new way to "see" the world and destress and refocus
me a great fan of meditation too. Let me know if you need meditation music, I try to do to music sharing on internet.
Jude,
Thanks sister, jia you. My six sense tells me all my sisters here can do it too…
Babydusts to you be it natural or ivf.
Noi,
You jia you too, you have my blessings.
Meow,
I dare not sms you on day or scan, don't want to stress you. But you are on my mind. May you succeed.
Lyn and Gan and Miraclebaby,
You girls hang in there, BFP to you yes yes yes.
