Any Mommies in mid-late 30s or over 40 with small children?

SBG
I think they have concerts there on Sunday evenings. Need to check their schedule. Not every sunday got!

I prefer to go in the mornings, not so hot or crowded. I bot a big loaf of white bread, only $1.50 (not Gardenia, of course), from a grocery shop near my home. Came home with less than half the packet - had bread for breakfast the next day lor!

Facebook
Will try to find out more about it. Thanks, tamarind.
 


Cowandchick, Hippo2002
Will bring some bread the next time I bring the kids to Botanical Gardens.

Tamarind
Kangeroo feeding at 4 p.m. Must go there on time to get queue number 'cos once the kangeroos are full, they'll hop away so those later in queue (no. 9, I think) may not get a chance to feed. $5 per feed. Very memorable, even for my 2 year old.
happy.gif


What I like about Facebook
You can find old friends if they're also in. You can update your photos and stories etc, and keep them private and available to only "friends", unlike a blog where anyone in the world can accidentally stumble onto it.
 
kira,
Kangaroo feeding sounds fun, will take note of the timing thanks. Actually I wanted to go for the elephant ride, don't know whether my kids will like it or not.

I think facebook is popular because it connects real people with real identity. Unlike forums where people can easily fake their identity.
 
Tamarind
Yah, but still you do get funny people if you are not careful. My old friend accepted some people he didn't know as "friends" and one of them, a big burly guy, posted a picture of himself in lingerie complete with fishnet stockings kneeling behind a truck! Yucks, how gross is that?!

Christmas coming
Sigh...having problems thinking of what to buy for friends... What do you get for people who are working and probably can afford easily whatever they want? Wish I can buy them time all nicely wrapped up.
 
X'mas gifts

for girlfriends, I usually buy silver accessories. I think review quite good because I often see them wearing those accessories when we meet up

for close family members, I usually get practical gifts like Aussino towel set or boxer shorts
 
As explained in the pic 'upstairs' .... dont know y, moderator didnt reply my emails on y I was suspended. The error msg said suspended, I felt more like banned forever.

Angelmum - using this at b**Supplies. Also it is just a word difference from Angelman Syndrome.



I just got myself registered in facebook - Perlin. I found a few ppl from the same secondary school. Think it is still very new so my other search wasnt successful. Still dont understand y need to poke ppl or send a gift. There's a marketplace, wonder biz good not. If gd, no need to be labelled 'illegal selling', like SMH.


here's link on Xmas gifts
Christmas gifts products:
http://www.unionbook.com.sg/X'mas%20Gifts%20Picture.xls

Other general gift products:
http://www.hidezon.com/uniongifts/Uniongiftscatalogue.htm

I noticed ppl like to buy photo frames, soft toy as Xmas gift, most ppl like? Not me!. I guess these r common stuff to suit casual friends. I guess voucher is the best - receiver can choose anytime/anything (just top up if needed) he/she likes rather den collect dust or being re-presented elsewhere.
 
Angelmum

I don't like soft toys. Always donate to salvation army
Photo frames depends lah, branded one ok
biggrin.gif


shopping vouchers a little tricky. Cannot give too little. But too much very shiong for my pocket. Buy gifts more presentable lor
 
Morning


Hippo > voucher also got $5 deno. Sometimes caught in between like yr budget for that particular person is $8 but voucher values r $5 or $10. I dont need to wrap presents for Xmas cos dont celebrate or do any exchange, just another PH for us. NO HEADACHES, yeah!!

Kira > I also did a search thus got the same link. Must use real name so yr long lost friends can find u. I wanted to put my dialect name + initials + web nick but failed cos too long. Decided to use the most 'common/latest' name .... anyway, my surname very rare so you3 xin1 ren2 can still reach me.
 
mommies

I was reading a relationship forum. So many <font color="ff0000">husbands having affairs</font>....so depressing. Their husbands were very nice & responsible towards families but all these changed after the affairs

I guess no marriage is really 'safe'. Good family men can go astray too. What would you do if you found out your hubby is having an affair?
 
X'mas gifts

I prefer things I can use, or none at all.
Just to share (not trying to promote anything): some people like personalised gifts, so we have that too. We supply oils at wholesale prices (no minimum quantity), and the buyers can label it themselves. Like having their own brand names. Most people are quite keen about them, and it's unique coz it's your own name/label. We also provide info sheet on oils and how to use them.
(ok enuf here. PM me if you want more details)

Hubby and affairs

you're right, hippo, no marriage is really 'safe'. I think I'll demand a huge alimony if I discover my hb has affair, and want divorce.

But I guess I haven't seriously thot about that. My fear is what if the kids find out? can be very traumatic for them!

Facebook

Don't have time yet to get there, but will probably give it a try later! Thanks for all the info!
 
<font size="-2">no marriage is really 'safe'. I think I'll demand a huge alimony if I discover my hb has affair, and want divorce. </font> Agree with C&C. But if HB poor n no $$ pay how? At least $1000 maintenance fee excl kids' also cant afford, how? If dont divorce felt he so dirty right?


Still figuring facebook ..... recently discovered something call blinkie, nicey nicey ley but how to upload here?
 
Hippo2002, Cowandchick, Angelmom
Not every hubby is unfaithful lah...very unfair to hubby of us to entertain such thoughts if he's been trying his wholehearted best to support the family.
happy.gif
 
Kira Ko,

Christmas presents-
if its for close friends, and I cannot afford much, I would buy small size multi-pack cosmetics from well known brands e.g. crabtree and evelyn - put them individually into pretty gift pouches- one each for a friend- cos I know they will use this good quality stuff...

I feel its more the thought that counts, since my friends can probably afford most things themselves too, so no need to outdo that...

What I find really over-rated is office christmas gift giving...that is really meaningless, with people thinking high and low what to get for colleagues...and usually end up with "useless" stuff like mugs or chocolates or poor quality bath stuff (no offence to anyone)...really waste of time...It would be more meaningful if say everyone in office buys a present for kids in orphanges...and the company does a group donation together with company visit to the orphange...just grousing here...
 
Fairyprincess
I love your idea! Yah, I don't want to get them things that they won't use and yah, people generally are more willing to try quality products. Thanks! Heheh, agree with you on the office gift exchange. Similar feeling about the preschool gift exchange too. Luckily, no more for us.
happy.gif
 
Presents
Was talking with a good friend and the friend suggested that perhaps we should stop all this gift exchange for Christmas and birthdays 'cos it's getting increasingly difficult to get things for one another. Mummies, do you exchange gifts with friends still?
 
Kira

yeah I do, for birthdays & X'mas

I don't see that as a chore. In fact, I love buying gifts for close friends. Anyway, it's the thoughts that you put into it that really counts
 
Hippo2002
I was wondering if we are too busy to really catch up and know what one another likes anymore. I stopped exchanging gifts with a relative 'cos we are so different that we keep getting the wrong gifts for each other. You know, people tend to get what they like, which may not be what the other person really needs or like.
 
1066646.gif

fairyprincess > I like yr idea of collecting gifts for the orphanage/needies.

Really find it so difficult to get a suitable gift during Xmas n BD when I was working. Most of the colleagues using branded while I'm not so u c, my gift (although some may say it's the thot that counts) not really suit them. I'm glad I'm now free fm such 'chores/headaches'.
1066647.gif
 
kira,
That's so gross. There are lots of crazy people in the internet.

Yesterday I brought my kids to Bright Smile Dentist at Tiong Bahru. Their teeth are now sparkling white after polishing, I am so happy ! The dentist is very good with kids. Each child is $50, is that expensive ?

Unfaithful Hubby
If hubby is unfaithful, there is nothing we can do. Just accept the fact, divorce and move on lor. Of course also must demand huge alimony, at least half his montly salary.

Last month when I visited the fortune teller, I over heard the fortune teller told another lady, that she and her hubby's marriage was written in the books 5000 years ago, ming zhong zhu ding. I think whether a marriage works or not depends on fate.
 
Angelman,
Yah, on one hand, not getting gifts is a relief but it is a little sad 'cos I think it's a symptom that we are not so close anymore...don't really know the other friends need or want or willing/able to spend that much...

Tamarind
Marriage cannot wholly depend on fate. I think commitment to your partner, vows and marriage is very, very important. Can't be that the books suddenly allow increasing number of divorces... The dental charges are cheaper than GPA and more ex than NTUC Denticare and School Dental Service. But since you can claim, why worry? It's a reasonable claim, not too exhorbitant.
happy.gif
 
kira,
Claim from where ? I never claim leh. What's GPA ?

Yes commitment is very important. But some men just don't have this commitment, and there is nothing their wives can do about it. I have heard of wives who check their hubby's SMS messages, check their credit card bills, etc. What for ?
 
Tamarind
Oh, I had the impression from an earlier post that your company will reimburse you the dental costs. GPA is another dental clinic. Yah, it's really sad when one party isn't committed...why marry in the first place? Peer or parental pressure? But, I think the more successful a man is, the more temptations he faces so ultimately, it is his committment to his partner and marriage that preserves the marriage. Commitment doesn't just mean mental will power but also taking care not to put himself in a position where he may be severely tempted e.g. no single dinner/lunch dates, etc.
 
Tamarind
My son is not in MMI. His school is just a small neighbourhood at HDB area.

Unfaithful Husband
Unfortunatly I had seen many men keeping mistress/girlfriend.Last week, I just met a friend in the botanic garden. He was there with his girlfriend while his wife was at the church. Some even went travelling with their girlfriends. Their wifes are still kept in the dark! Not to mention that those who flirt in the office. Sigh...
 
Kira Ko
They got married because of responsibilities. Their parents like the girlfriend very much. So no choice got to married.
 
Unfaithfuls - so scary hor! But like what hippo said, no one is immune to it. Guess we'll just have to weigh our options and choose the best course. But we'd rather it not happen!

Talking about gifts... you know I like personalised and unusual stuffs? Well, I found this cute music box that you can personalise yourself, at a church bazaar! It's unusual coz it comes with the music sheets with holes you run through the music box and it plays a different tune for each different sheet! They even give you extra sheets and a puncher to 'make' your own music! What a find!
 
Hi Mummies
Me still bz....

How was weekend? We went to Changi beach area and the kids played at the playground and sat on the swing. Initially hb/I thot our T2 (chara) wl be scared on the swing even tho sitting on hb's lap...scully she looked so happy and enjoyed it...haha... I try to post some pics later....

Gifts exchange
I don't like it cos it becomes an obligation that u must buy for ppl... worse, end up buying chocs!!! (Royce or Godiva still ok...hehe).
Gifts exchange among colleagues is ok provided u didn't stay in the co for long...for me, after a couple of years, it got really draggy.... so one year I told my colleagues that we stop.

Marriage/affairs
Yah, I also wonder... if they don't like/love each other, why marry in the first place? Then start creating all this sort of problem.
Better to have said don't marry, then regret later on. I think all couples before they marry should attending marriage preparation classes.

I agree with kira we cannot leave it to fate. Both parties gotta work hard at it and protect the marriage.
Sole lunches becos of farewell, subordinate's birthday is ok lah...and not often.
Whether u get big alimony is one thing, children are the ones who suffer the most at the end of it.
Not that the wronged party does not..... it's still painful but at least not so blur as the children.....

pantone
Ur friend is so daring to go out in the open with girlfriend??!! My goodness!

kira
I wl take up ur pressie of time wrapped up in a gift box!!!!

fairyprincess
Crabtree is good but can't keep buying every year since their products range don't really increase.

I also hardly buy gifts nowadays. For my nephews, either I give them cash or book vouchers....
 
Fated

I think marriage is fated to some extent. If no temptation, the marriage may last a lifetime. If fated to have 3rd party, then in the face of a huge test like this, a marriage may fail. So can say it is fated in that sense lor

Of course commitment & communication are very important in any relationship. So cannot leave everything to fate, must put in some effort in maintaining the romance in a relationship
 
Pantone
That's so sad. I think in life, you'll meet people who are more attractive, rich, successful and funny, etc...so a spouse has to make that committed decision to remain faithful, to keep away from dangerous situations and to work towards keeping that passion lest it fizzles out in the humdrum of everyday life. That's why there's all this hulabalu about getting and the vows you take. It's a lifetime commitment.

Cowandchick
That's interesting. Cowandchick, I have a good friend who is also into lavender essential oils. Do you mind pming me what you have. Thanks!
happy.gif


StyloBB
Where's the playground? Been to Changi Beach couple of times and never been there! I like the board walk and the planes.
happy.gif
 
passions

how do you keep that passion alive in your marriage ?


Having couple time is important. However I noticed our <font color="aa00aa">topic mainly revolve around the kids</font> even when we are out on a date. Only us or it happens to mommies here too?

Hubby joined me in line dancing recently. Having a common hobby creates more time together
wink.gif
 
Patone & mommies

would you tell your friend if you saw her spouse with another woman & behaving intimately?

quite a dilemma right? on one hand didn't want to carry tales, on the other hand hope to warn her if she still has a chance to salvage their marriage before it is way too late

on the flip side of the coin, would you believe if a close friend told you she saw your hubby with another woman?

hehe, hypothetical questions. Read all these in the relationship forum. So dramatic!
 
Birthday party

mommies, do you know where to buy those huge lolipops?

my first time organising a party for dd1. Any tips on how to make it more fun for the kids?

Also, are we supposed to invite their parents too or just ask them to drop off the kids? what is the usual practice?
 
kira,styloBB,
Most likely the hubby and wife really love each other at the time they get married. But people change. The wife can become fat and less attractive. So the hubby becomes attracted to other beautiful women. Or the relationship can turn sour, especially with kids, it's very easy to quarrel everyday about who should do what.

passions
My hubby and I go out to watch movies, or have dinner at least 1 - 2 times a week without the kids. We have been together for 18 years, so we don't really have the type of passion like young people any more. But we still hold hands when outside lah hehehe
 
Hippo2002
Tender loving care, little gestures that show love and consideration e.g. massages, time to rest, are important.
happy.gif


Good website for party research: http://www.amazingmoms.com/htm/KidsBirthdayParties.htm
I organised a train party two years back. Made a train and some signs. That was a hit. They raced round and round in the train. Then, we donated the train to his school. I organise some games related to trains but some children didn't want to play :p as they prefered to play with balloons. Some played near the swimming pool and my parents were so worried that they may fall in that they stationed themselves near the swimming pool. Good to have extras stationed around to make sure the children not in the games are safe. Forgot to provide favours for participating in musical chairs and only provided 1 prize. :p Made a wall puzzle and the whole thing collapsed 'cos it was too heavy. So, need to try out your games first to make sure they work. :p Sigh...I spent so long painting and laminating that wall puzzle. I also put out library books on trains on the table but nobody read. I had some homemade train puzzles but few played. Put out some colouring sheets and bookmarks and ribbons. All were taken and there was not enough. I didn't provide food for the parents, just the cake. Haha. Hope sharing my experience helps.
happy.gif


Tamarind
Yah. That's why it's a conscious effort to be committed to marriage. But, wow you've been married for so long...did you marry early?
 
kira,
We were boyfriend/girlfriend for 7 years before getting married
happy.gif


Balloons are essential for any children's parties. My kid's birthday parties are very simple, I only need to get 30 helium balloons for them and they will be so happy.
 
I think it is important for a couple to share some common hobby and have some common friends. Otherwise, the topic will always only revolve around the kids. Keeping a marriage alive requires effort on both parties. Many people just "let nature takes its own course" and they will end up having only a sense of obligation towards each other. This kind of marriage may be quite difficult to sustain in our society where there are many distractions and temptations.
------
I just collected my son's P1 report book from his teacher yesterday. He scored 290 out of 300 marks. His teacher commented that he has no problems academically but needs to learn to be less impulsive and he can get overly excited when playing games. Do your children get very excited and start to get rowdy when playing games too?
 
Tamarind

thanks for the tips!
Did you hold the party in your house? what is helium balloon? do you know where to buy those party stuff?
did you invite the kids parents? The kids are dd1 PAP classmates


Kira
Thanks for the link. Your idea is interesting but I have space constraint, not enough place to set up a train leh


JessChan
your boy's result is very good! Did you teach him personally?
 
brought dd1 for orientation at the new kindergarten

wow, a lot of miscellaneous expenses!

need to pay $80 for reader (story books) per term, material fees $50 per term, computer $110 per term. 2 set uniforms + school bag $46. $20 admin for school fees deduction through CDA

miscellaneous cost almost 60% of school fees per term

now I appreciate PAP, computer is included in school fees at no extra charge. Uniform only $10 per set. no admin fees, only one-time material fees
 
Hi Mummies
Marriage / relationship
I find I hv to work even harder after marriage to keep and nourish the relationship .... be there for hb as well as for kids...

tamarind
Therefore there is this part about Commitment ie even if spouse turns fat or ugly, still committed to love him/her. Of crse some ppl kena tempted by eye candy...

Becos ur mom helps looks after the kids, u/hb hv the privilege to do out w/o them. For some of us, it's not easy... me/hb try to go out once a week but stimes it does not happen as our mom/mil need a rest.. so we hv to take leave.

How long have u been married?? 11 years??
Me reaching 5 years in Dec.

pantone/hippo
What to do if we see friend's hb with another woman? Phew... so difficult leh. Fort. so far, I did not get in that situation. Only saw an acquaintance whom I know was married but holding hands with another man!! But I hear they have since divorced.......

kira
I think we/hbs have to be conscious... don't get into situation where we become vulnerable, ie working late with an opposite sex, start confiding in each other and .....
Also no single dinner dates... I hv made that v clear to my hb. Work lunches is fine, cos can't be avoided at times... but not to be often.

hippo
Party - I think u beta invite at least one parent otherwise how u going to jagar the kids. Don't want any accident to happen whilst at ur venue.... and u know how kids are, so active...

Can rent helium machine...

U can find a lot of party stuff at Concourse.... more expensive will be places at Centrepoint and HV.
Also online www.birthdaydirect.com but v expensive

jess
I think it's normal for kids to be rowdy when playing games..

Ur boy has good results!!!
 
Jessmum
Congrats on your son's good results.
happy.gif
My boys are boisterous too. Think that everyone has different characters. Can't expect every kid to be quiet and introverted, right?

StyloBB
Yah agree with you on that both have to be conscious.

Tamarind, StyloBB
Me reaching 9 years (since ROM) this month, 10 years togeth.
happy.gif


Hippo2002
Planning a party is fun.
happy.gif
Will do it again for my second one. Dunno whether can rent void deck?
 
Hippo
Actually I'm not very close to those guys. So wont tell their wifes loh. Had met their wifes 1 or twice though.

If it is my girlfriend's hubby who is unfaithful, unless I am very very sure, I wont tell her. For eg, if I saw the hubby going out dinning with another lady, does it mean he is unfaithful? Probably just mention that I saw her hubby with somebody.
 
hippo2002,
Helium balloons are those that can float around. They have long colourful ribbons and the kids will have a fun time playing with them. I ordered from http://www.grefio.com.sg/. You can also buy from some shops in concourse, it's cheaper.

I didn't invite their classmates, only my close relatives and neighbours.

I think PAP is value for money, if we can find one with good teachers. My girl's PAP nursery teacher is very good, it is really worth it at $55 per month only. Next year she will go to PAP at another block for her kindergarten, $160 per month including enrichment, hope that it is worth it.

styloBB,
Some people may not be so lucky to find a hubby who is totally committed to marriage.

I sort of believe that marriage is "ming zhong zhu ding". Then perhaps the hubby will work in an environment where there no pretty girls in sight hahaha

Yes I have been married for 11 years. You are right I feel quite lucky that my mother is staying with me. Now she goes home every weekend. But she will be renting her flat out soon, so she will be with us even during weekends. I feel relieved because I am so tired out during weekends taking care of the kids.

kira,
Any plans for 10 year wedding aniversary ? We didn't celebrate at all, but my hubby brought me a tiffany diamond pendant, and gave me a card saying that he is very grateful to me for giving him 2 wonderful children. That really made me so happy.
 
any mommies tried <font color="119911">MacDonald party</font>?


Tamarind
your hubby is very generous!
so sweet of him to write you a lovely note
wink.gif



hubby & I ROM 8 years, together for 10 years. I told him he occupied one third of my life leh

as for straying, a fortune teller in Hong Kong said I will be the one straying. Adviced me to resign to fate after marriage, don't wander.

huh? I find it so unbelievable!
hehe, maybe that's the reason hubby keeps me at home, just in case
lol.gif
 
By my standards, my boy has done quite well but I think it is considered "normal" in P1, even though it is just a neighbourhood school because it seems like many of his classmates did as well. He doesn't even get a consolation prize for getting 99 marks for Chinese and 98 for Maths... how encouraging....
 
kira/tamarind
Trust is v important in a relnship and marriage. Imagine if we don't trust our spouse, then wl worry everyday ...

tamarind
But some ppl u know can't be trusted leh.. but I guess love can be blind at times... hehe

Ur hb sounds like the guai guai type...hehe

kira
U asked me where is the place... it could be the same Changi spot that u know... can see when the planes are landing...
 
I think maybe the school's exam is very simple, that's why many students can do quite well. For the elite schools, the exam papers usually contain some challenging questions to differentiate between the good and better students.

He just attends classes at Berries.
 
StyloBB

in the face of temptation, very hard to trust leh. Imagine sweet young things throwing themselves at your man, very hard to guarantee he has the resolve to reject their advances even though he knows theoretically he is supposed to be faithful & committed to marriage

Even if it doesn't happen now, when we are in 50s, with winkles & everywhere sagging, how to compete with these sweet young things?

This is where fate comes in. Like what Tamarind said 'marriage is "ming zhong zhu ding". Then perhaps the hubby will work in an environment where there no pretty girls in sight'
wink.gif


Without major test like affairs, a marriage may last a lifetime
 
JessChan
Congrats on your boy's good results!
all kids are rowdy when it comes to playing games. Even my girl gets hysterical. Fortunately she's learned to tone down a lot now! Headache man!

Kira
I don't know how to attach files with PM. Maybe you PM me, then I can send to you directly?

Years of marriage
Me coming to 16 years now! No more fire, no more flame. Lao already lah!
Over the years, we've learned to keep our opinions to ourselves, and mouths shut! I think that helps to keep the marriage together. But we always try to give the other space to do "our own things". I think we have accepted each others' idiosyncracies!
 


Tamarind
That was so sweet. If the younger one is more able to travel, maybe we'll finally splurge on a trip overseas next year. But, sigh...must continue to improve as a wife first lah... Now, I still have too many shortcomings, feel so guilty towards him sometimes.

StyloBB
Yah, I think that there must be trust in the marriage. If you know that someone doesn't trust you, you'll feel walled out and more distant, right?

Hippo2002
Yah, I think the banking and finance sectors are rumoured to have a lot of affairs and divorces. Dunno whether actual statistics bear that out.

Pantone
Yah, you have a point...it's not very nice to accuse other people wrongly and sour the marriage with distrust. I guess I will only hint if the couple behaved intimately, e.g. good to take a break with hubby, etc.
 
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