Actually, I think their love for our children might not be real. Coz now that I informed my helper that she better take care of the kid well, her attitude towards him is slightly different. So now she does makes an effort to take care of him. Previously, despite my telling her various times not to let him take hold of items like battery and candles as he will put them in his mouth, she will do nothing even if he ends up holding them.
My current helper is picky about food too. I told her, I think you are richer than me because you pick food. The food we eat, sometimes we have leftovers and we eat them too, she's not willing to eat. she even once told my mil to eat leftovers, not sure if it was miscommunication. Now she's less picky.
Communication wise, I think they understand but not willing to follow instructions. Why do I say that? Coz simply, when my husband tells me in Chinese to get the shoes washed and purposely lined it out for her without saying a word to her, the shoes get washed whereas after i do pointing and telling her,
It doesn't get washed because she doesn't understand. Oh, and when I speak to her fiercely and question her over her excuses for so many things, she has no choice but to keep quiet.
I supervised people in my office and I have seen all kinds . I can only conclude this, if the person is not interested in doing her job well, she will never listen and remember not to mention do things your way. My maid, she is still bad at her chores and baby minding but I need her. For things like when it rains and I do not want my children to get wet, she will get off the car and wait with the kids for me. Also, how the work gets done really depends on the personality of the worker.
And yes, she is sneaky abtw certain things and not as sweet and naive as she portrays herself to be. If you have a maid, watch for eavesdropping on your actions. E.g., my maid wants to know how to switch on the tv, I refuse to teach her as we hardly watch tv so she watches from the side of her eyes when I told her to rock baby. She watches from the side of her eyes while my mil was taking money out from the wardrobe. These are sneaky behavior.
Oh she also cut corners on housework if she thinks I am not checking. Since she promised to do her baby minding (make sure he doesn't fall or eat things he shouldn't), I have decided to let her lousy housekeeping go. My maid hardly does cooking and grocery shopping are all done by me.
Occasionally, I will remind her to do her work well indirectly. Honestly, some people cannot work without knowing that someone is checking on their work. And some people will think that they are good at their work if no comment is made which is what happened with my current maid. And i say this after doing various experiences while giving her the benefit of the doubt.
Today, we went to a restaurant and had lousy food. Totally not worth it. She asked me why I did not finish my food after i told her we are not going again unless she finds her food good.. I told her it was horrible, I could cook much better than that so why should I want to go there again to pay so much money. This was to remind her that the same thing could happen to her.
Previously, when I asked her if bread was expensive in her home, she told me same price as Singapore so not expensive. I thought, in Myanmar, a graduate earns only about 500 sing dollar. So I do not know if she was trying to tell me her pay is low. Now, after I indicate that I'm willing to send her home, she tells me that the bread is expensive. They do not have money to buy grain / potatoes for farming so stuck with rice farming.
Nowadays, after the experiences with maids, I take whatever they say and do, with a pinch of salt.
As for checking the bags, just inform her, do not want a case whereby if anything goes missing after she leaves, you suspect her then blacklist her so she cannot come back to work . Better yet, inform her that if you find anything which doesn't belongs to her in her belongings, you will report her to police then she will be jailed and cannot come back to Singapore to work again. I do that in the beginning with all my maids. Make them think twice before breaking the law.