2WW - for those TTC-ing

Hi hope_4_bb,

yes,i'm still ard.haven't posted anything coz been a bit bz.CONGRATS on prof wong's approval of u going for IVF.u know,some docs will say no to IVF,but i feel prof wong is quite okie abt anything.haha.as long as it doesn't threaten ur wellbeing.b4 i did IUI the last 2 times,i was discussing with him IVF and he didn't even say no,though he said normally after 3 failed IUIs,then IVF will be recommended.Prof Mary rauff is a bit more conservative.she has a lot of faith in me being able to conceive on my own.i asked her coz of my history if i need to go thru' genetic counselling.she said no need.

at the moment,i still have the IUD in me.i think i'll try till the end of the yr and c how.my hubby will be away in Dec,so even if i place myself on the IVF list,that means the timing has to be correct,otherwise after egg retrieval,then hubby is away.i'm not sure if i want to juz ive up or go for IVF.to be frank,i'm quite sick and tired of all these ttc.i'm okie as long as i stay away fr babies,baby showers,cousins/cousin's wives getting preg etc.i'm still having 2 minds abt IVF.i'm seriously going to have a difficult time coz i'll be going thru all these by myself without spousal support.and i'm not sure if i can cope with the disappointment.anyway,i still have the IUD in me.i'm going for another hysteroscopy tom to c if IUD can be taken out.only then will i decide on my next move.
 


monstor,
understand the kind of disappointment also....but guess that the only way out for me....coz every 1 yr..i will have a relapse of my preexisting condition...so i got a limited time frame ..to be preggy and deliver bb safely... I think no pain can stop me from having a bb...but is the disapointment that really make you demoralised....
 
Hi gals,

jus like to share with those gals who are keen to do IUI with KKH.

So far, I have spent abt $985.08 for my 1st SO-IUI treatment with KKH - 2 x 400units of puregon, 42 inserts of progesterone, ovulation kits, semen preparation, all inclusive le.
 
Hi Hope_4_bb,

wow,u're lucky then,since the lab's closing has been delayed.so u can have ur 1st IVF done this yr,hopefully.Yes,make full use of the window period u have.I wish u all the best.let me know how u r going.I'm going to c Dr.Fong (also fr NUH) today to see if my IUD can be taken out.I really hope so.don't worry,u have a good team of docs behind u.i seriously have full faith in my teams of docs who are rehabilitating me.leave the worry to them and juz follow the instructions
 
Hi hope_4_bb,

Mary rauff doesn't do hysteroscopy/ressection of the uterine septum.so she referred me to Dr Fong.Yeah! i had my IUD taken out yesterday.now juz have to wait for 'artificial' period (coz on oral contraceptive to thicken lining of uterus),then c how.but that's 1 step closer to being able to conceive

btw,hope_4_bb,

there's a talk by NUH called It's an 'ART'.it's on 3 Oct,at Woolands regional library and it's given by PC wong,Anupriya,and an embryologist at NUH.if u are interested,call 67726464.it's fr 2-5pm.i am going.

if any of u gals are interested too,u can register.

my hubby was the one who picked up the flyer while paying at NUH yesterday.i was a bit surprised he's so proactive in this.he really wanted to listen to the talk.i said i couldn't go coz i have lessons on sat afternoons.he was a little disappointed coz he didn't want to go by himself.so i've decided to skip lesson that day to go.i really want to go for my lesson coz it's impt,but seeing how proactive my hubby is in all this makes me feel i have to go with him to 'encourage' him.
 
monstor,
i have been to this session already during July time..=P

gd that he initated it..it was also my huby who took the flyer from NUH and said he wanted to go..keke..
coz same like yr huby....he doenst like BD...our BD session is like i am a bb making machine...5 mins he put in the preseed and we are done...=(
so sad rite..
 
Hi monster
had sent u an email since yesterday.. Really hope u will reply to me soon by tonight as i really hope to settle this asap.. Thk u for ur understanding.. Congrat to u too that u r one step closer to conceive.;)
 
Hi Joanne,

yes,i know wat u mean.my email has been a bit funny these days.sometimes i cannot open it.i've PM u (16.9.09).Pls check.All the best,okie
 
Hi Hope_4_bb,

eh? wat u wrote sounds like it's written by me! haha! hey gal,u're not alone,okie.i'm like a machine too.worse still,i need to coax,cajole,don't offend him etc.BUT! Thank god for the invention of Preseed.At least it helps if neither of us are in the right mood.can u imagine how much worser it can be if u're dry and u still need to BD? then u still have to try to get wet.at least with Preseed,it's like magic.I love Preseed.Oh no,i'm speaking like a man.haha.

Can u pls tell me how the talk went? wat was mentioned.i'm more interested in wat goes on in the lab
 
monstor,
the talk just introduce to u the embrologist, and nureses etc.. involve in doing the ivf..tells you what are the injection to take for supress hormones, and triggering hormones phases.. shows u a sample of the needles for injection,
tells you the whole process of ivf, who needs to do ivf and doing a day 3 or day 5 trfer..etc..
 
Hi.. New here and trying to Conceive.
Have been trying for 6 mths but no result.
But ppl surrounding has been telling that they are pregnant.. Super stress.

Any good recommendation or method to share?
 
Just faith: How often do you need to insert the progesterone? I was on the clomid protocol for my 1st SOIUI, but will be trying the progesterone protocol for my next IUI. It sounds very difficult from the way you describe.

Janice: Welcome here. Hm, if you are born in yr 78, think you are not that old, so maybe give yourself another 6 months to see if can strike. Cos usually recommended if try for 1 year never conceive shld go see doc. But maybe you shld look around for a gynae if you havent had one, to start doing checks to see both you and your hubby bodies are ok.
 
Just faith,

I was on Protocol 2 with KKH. Gotta insert progesterone into v or rectrum every morning and evening. It isn't really difficult - jus that you have to find the way that you prefer. For me, I chose to insert into rectrum.

All the while, I thought progesterone will be given for SO-IUI done at KKH. So what were you given after your SO-IUI at KKH?
 
Janice,

If you want fast result, suggest that see a fertility specialist.

Otherwise, give yourself another 3 to 6 months. Frankly, I believe all docs will tell u the same thing - ie. to try natural. unless, your health check ups reveal that you or your husband have some health problems.
 
BB dreamz (sorry, just realise that I was replying to myself in my earlier post.)

I was on Protocol 2 with KKH. Gotta insert progesterone into v or rectrum every morning and evening. It isn't really difficult - jus that you have to find the way that you prefer. For me, I chose to insert into rectrum.

All the while, I thought progesterone will be given for SO-IUI done at KKH. So what were you given after your SO-IUI at KKH?

By the way, the progesterone is not cheap. 42 capsules (400mg) costs me almost $200!
 
Just faith: I was on clomid protocol. Was given clomid, then do puregon injection. Doc says on clomid no need progesterone.

I think cost wise about the same, I spent abt $1k for the IUI. Clomid not ex i tink, it's the puregon.

Anyway, good luck to you, relax ya.
 
Hello ladies,

I juz need to vent my frustration here.Hubby went to visit his best friend's wife who gave birth yesterday.I asked him if he was really okie to go,he insited he had to go out of courtesy.I really don't know how he feels/how he must have felt when he saw the baby.some more it's his friend's no.2.i was really mean.he said his friend's wife doesn't drink chic essence,we should buy bird's nest.i told him hack care.it's a little something he gives to her,and if she doesn't want to drink it,it's her business.this is also the couple who happily wanted to give me the HPT.so irritating.

and these ppl are really amazing.gave birth yesterday,pic on facebook today,while she's still in hospital? i find these ppl dont' appreciate their child at all.if it was me,i will be spending all my time nursing my baby,bonding with my baby,not putting pic up on facebook.sometimes i feel they juz wanna show off.

i told my hubby don't tell them anything abt us ttc/our m/c.and if we have kids,no photos on facebook.sometimes,i think to myself.when i have my child's 1 mth old celebration,i'm going to give a speech to thank ppl who have helped me thru' this difficult time,and i'm going to share stories of insensitive idiots like them and say,"shame on all these ppl".it's so mean,i know,but did they spare a tot for us when they offered us a HPT?

hubby and I are so 'evil',i feel.it sort of consoles us that they wanted a boy,but this 2nd child is a gal.hubby juz said yesterday (after a friend rang him to inform him of this friend's baby)we shall continue to try.i juz wanted to burst out in tears.and we were talking abt gender preference when we mentioned abt this couple.hubby said if he can have a gal,he'll be very happy already.i feel so bad on hearing that.i'm sure all of u know wat i mean.and i aksed wat if he has 3 gals? he said he'll be very happy too.at this moment,i can only imagine the joy my hubby will experience if i can give him a child,be it a boy or gal.

and 1 last freaky thing...do u all believe some ppl have a very strong 6th sense? i'm not talking abt inauspicious things.juz in general.i had a feeling this couple will have a stillbirth,juz like us.and guess wat? my hubby found out (when visiting them),that the baby was not moving much,that's y they delivered earlier.their gynae said placenta 'not working'.i assusme it's placental detachment.i didn't tell my hubby abt me having this feeling,otherwise it will stir up a quarrel again,for sure.i guess they were lucky that they caught it early.placental detachment is usually not a rapid process.for mine,there was no placental detachment at all.
 
Hi monster, don't feel too agitated, know how you feel. Btw, what's HPT?

What I can say most pple only care about themselves in general. To be frank, I imagine when I have my child, I'd be extremely excited, in fact, I may even post the pics on facebook too, but maybe not so fast while in hospital. I suppose there's nothing wrong if u wana "show off" or declare/share your joy.

Frankly, I think others (like your hubby best friend & wife) seriously won't understand the difficulty of TTC if they never experience such difficult journey themselves. In fact, when I was younger, and had colleagues who also don't have children after marrying for so long, I always wonder what's wrong with them, cos it appears most pple seem to have children easily. At that point in time, I don't think I can appreciate whatever difficulties they have trying to conceive. Think the best way to deal with such pple is ignore their comments, and try not to hang around them too much if they are so insensitive.

At least for you, it's just friends so you don't see them so often. I find dealing with colleagues even worse, cos you see them day in day out (except weekends). You know, I'm planning to go SOIUI again and maybe IVF (if all else fails), and one of my worries is colleagues will know I'm going for such procedures (again), cos gotta take time off go hospital etc and maybe 1 day mc for IUI and duno how many days MC for IVF. If I succeed, it'd be great, if not, I can imagine the gossip flying around (alas behind my back).

Sometimes, really feel like quitting my job, but just that may not make sense financially, plus wil lose the 4 mths maternity if I get preggy.

I know it's difficult but just tell ourselves ignore the insensitive comments from other pple, we live our lives for ourselves. Don't let these pple affect our moods too much okie.
 
Hi bb,

HPT = Home Preg Test

Actually,i do agree with u.u cannot stop ppl fr being happy with having a child.but wat irks me is the offer of the HPT when they knew we lost a child and we are trying.my hubby says too much some times.and i feel the pressure to see LC Cheng coz the friends in this group sees LC cheng,in addition to Lawrence Ang.to me,there's no point in seeing a gynae if u don't know wat u want to get out of it.it's not that i haven't spent enough $$ on all my treatments.so my hubby wants to see LC cheng as he thinks so many ppl sees him,and gets preg,so he must be good.a doc cannot do miracles and magically get u preg,right? in the 1st place,these ppl did not have problems conceiving naturally.i don't know y my hubby has so much trust in LC Cheng.even if i go see him,i don't know wat my hubby wanna get out of that consult.his consultation is not cheap.$150.and i can so see LC cheng saying,"since u got preg twice,go back and try naturally coz there's nothing wrong with u.besides everything has been corrected surgically already." it's so frustrating.my hubby is speaking like a real idiot.

i know wat u mean abt the collegues part.my collegues didn't know i went for IUI coz i juz called in sick that day.and i went back to work the very next day.yah,i guess if u take such long leave for IVF,it's good to tell ur boss so he/she can understand y u need such a long time off.luckily for me,coz i'm in the medical field,all my collegues are very understanding and supportive.sometimes,like u,i feel like quitting work too coz it's really a mad rush getting to appts for sccans,then going back to the office.but i don't think i can do w/o a job and afford all these expensive treatment.

thanks for ur encouragement! i hope things go well with u too.
 
oh,i need to add.the best part is: when i asked my hubby y his friends are seeing LC Cheng coz LC cheng is mainly a fertility specialist,he said he doesn't know.so juz coz everyone else sees LC Cheng,i should see him? with no purpose in mind??? WTF,right?
 
monster... cool down!!!!

guess some people are just not senstitive with the things going around them.

my galfrd gave birth on 19/9.. i also dun wan to visit her at hospital... i expected le.. my friends already starting to ask me when is my turn... arrghhh!!!!! i hate it!!!
 
Hi Just Faith,

haha.i was really agitated when i wrote the last post.i have a new strategy this time round.i shall vent all my frustration here so that in front of my hubby,i can be an angel and i can cajole him into BD.sigh...it has to come down to this.but if it works,then y not,right?

yah,life is sometimes so unfair,hor? this friend who juz gave birth wanted 20.09.2009 coz she said it's such a good date.WTF??? can give birth safely is already considered a blessing,wanna choose date some more?

wat do u say to ur friends who ask u? i usually say i had a stillbirth & a m/c b4 and they usually shut up.these are for ppl who don't know my history.most of my close friends know abt my case and are so supportive.i'm so thankful i have such ppl surrounding me.they will even ask if i'm okie if they learned that i went to visit someone who gave birth.

I hope u didn't go & visit ur friend.juz send a card or something if u feel u need to be courteous.i think the main thing is u need to protect ur wellbeing.and if being near a baby kills u,then don't go near them.i know avoidance is not the best,but if avoidance can make u happy for 1 day,then y not? learning abt someone giving birth is difficult enough,let alone having to go and visit that person.
 
Thanks BB and Jus Faith..
Maybe because I'm too anxious...And when it's about the next period.. i would start to hope that it doesn't come..

But it's always disappointment..

Ppl ard me keep telling me not to be stress over it.. But how not to be when every one around me is hitting the P..

Sigh..
 
HI all,
i'm new here. Have been planning for 1 yr and hv went gyane check, to see if both me & my hubby are healthy enuf to plan. Prob lies w me. Not ovaluating v well (irregular AF) n eggs not v big. Hv been on clomid for 4 cycles still no news. Hubby don't want me to go thru the IUI/IVF suffering (jabs), so i'm thinking of seeking TCM help.

Hi Joanne,
I'm staying in the north too. Note that u hv recommended CoCo to Zou YuMin at AMK. Can I know what are the procedures she will do to u for pple who plan to hv kid? Thanks!
 
monster,

my friend who gave birth on 19/9 also said she will negotiate with her gynae to see if she can induce on 20/9. cos she dun wan to give birth on the last day of the 7th month.

i was like thinking wtf.. she was so damn lucky to strike on the nx month after her customary wedding. but yet she keep telling us she din plan for d pregnancy etc etc etc.. can imagine how sad i was during that time? and when she intro a new friend to me, she added by saying, "oh, she has also been trying for a baby... longing for one... they got married for 8 years liao".

i was very steady tis time round. I dunno where I found the courage to decide not to visit her. If she invite me for baby shower, I will likely to book an air ticket to fly to KL to skip the celebration. Cos i know during baby shower, I will hear more things from my other friends.

Anyhow, I never deny to my friends that we want a baby... so when ppl ask, I jus say, soon-soon-soon!!!!
 
Hi Just Faith,

Ha! Serve ur friend right! Gave birth on last day of 7th mth.Good on u for having such courage.there's no need to go to KL if she invites u for her baby shower.Juz tell her you do not feel like going.I told my cousin i don't think i can ever hold his baby girl who was born on the same day as me,and a mth after my supposed EDD.I tell them outright.the only person i want to protect is myself and my hubby.this baby girl is having her 1st b'day and i said outright i'm not going to attend her b'day party.i'm not even intending to give a prezzie.i'll juz pretend i never heard of it.i didn't even want to tell my hubby coz i don't want to upset him or open a floodgate of emotions.

u know,u should juz tell ur friend to shut up.i would.btw,are u sure she's ur friend,not ur foe? all my friends are so protective of me and keep encouraging me,saying they know how much i'm going thru' etc.I think i call those friends.

when ppl ask u,juz say,"shut up,if u know wat i'm going thru',u wouldn't be asking." it's so impolite,but say it once and u'll never be asked again.how nice,huh? hehe
 
Hi Ladies,

Wow,read something on facebook that can set me on fire.hubby's friend's wife who juz gave birth,announces on facebook it's not easy to be coping with 2.THEN Y HAVE NO.2,right? i'm sure anyone of us here will take it in our stride if we can be blessed with 2.and she replied another friend "so envious u're going to perth,i'm bounded." WTF?!?!??!!? no one gun pointed u to have no.2 and have to do confinement.so y are u 'complaining' now? these ppl don't know how fortunate they are,right? sometimes,i juz wanna give her a slap and tell her to stop putting all these up on facebook.i can't believe my hubby still want to be friends with this buddy,who has a bitch of a wife.
 
monster, i know u jus wana vent frustration. it's alright, go ahead, we understand.

Faith: think that fren of yrs either really NO EQ, or she isnt that much of a fren. Think if she invite u for baby shower, jus tell her not free la. Normally, I find it a bore to go to baby shower, cos maybe got no common story to share, esp those where everyone has kids. But I'll go if it's a good fren's. To be frank, I haven't experienced the in-your-face type of comments, but I only "imagine" what pple say behind my back. Anyway, as long as I dun hear, it's ok, just be thick-skinned, and pretend I hear nothing. No point spoiling my rice bowl, go IVF, even IUI, need lotsa money, plus I love travelling, need $ for that.

But frankly speaking, I did toy with the thought if 2 yrs down the road and still no success, think of quitting my job to take a break, provided hubby job stable.

Normally, I'm not really into other pple's babies, but I love my niece very much. She's really ultra adorable, my baby idol. And when she speaks, it's so sugary sweet. I would always visualise having a baby like her, and that is my dream.

Monster: just ignore that bitch hehe. You can do with 1 less toxic 'friend', at least, you have good friends to share with you. As for me, I didn't really share with many pple on my m/c, only 2 frenz know. Cos the thought of sharing with pple may just make me feel like crying. I'm not as brave as you. Think I prefer to keep things private, till I sucessful next time, then I"ll share my entire journey.
 
bb dreamz

sorry to rub on your old stories. just curious to know for your last 2 m/c, did u try natural or??

I am now into D28... today's bbt rose from past few days 36.87, 36.8, 36.8 ... to today's 36.95. I see a ray of hopes there. I wonder if I should do a HPT today. Or, just simply wait and wait or go play farmville in facebook?
sad.gif
 
Hi JC,

Which gynae did you see? Fertility specialist or those normal gynae?

If you really want a baby badly, all the injections done at SO-IUI/IVF is really nothing lor.. TCM may not work for all women.. and moreover, TCM treatment is really long. I have 3 rounds of clomid but no puregon support - I find it a waste of time. After I have gone thru SO-IUI (no clomid, only puregon), I find that by relying on clomid alone is really not enough for me.
 
Hi all,

I'm new here, but have been reading this thread for a year. Like all of you I'm ttc too. Usually I refrained from posting, but after I read monster's and faith's latest post, I feel I would like to contribute something.

Yes, I know all of us here didn't have an easy time ttc, but neither does it give us the right to criticize those who had an easier time of it. In fact, it only made us sound bitter and resentful that others have what we don't have YET.

Personally I felt like I'm under a lot of pressure as well. Everyone around me knows I'm ttc, and it is extra difficult for me when my cousin, my sister-in-law and ex-colleague all conceived at the same time. But I still turn up at their baby showers with an open heart and sincere blessings.

Life still goes on for others even though we have difficulty in this area of our life. They too may have trouble in some other areas of their life they do not make public. Jia Jia you ben nan nian de jing. If giving them your blessings is difficult, just keep away from them so they don't affect your mood.

Consider it earning some good karma for yourself in trying to conceive. This is the philosophy I have lived with, and accepted.

Whether or not you conceived, I believe it is enough knowing you and the people who matters have already seen the effort you put in.

just my 2cents, and I hope I have not offended anyone.
 
Attigal,

Thanks for taking your time to post the message.

If people around me could STOP telling me, THE PREGNANCY WAS NOT PLANNED or I HAVE 2ND THOTS ABT KEEPING THE BABY AT FIRST - perhaps i wouldn't feel so frustrated, upset or hate going to baby showers. These new parents are so fake and pretentious. My friend whom I mentioned in the earlier post even went to the extent of telling me, she has to "sacrifice" the guest room for baby's room instead. She also complained, she has to re-design her new flat again. U tell me, what is the big deal of entertaining overseas guests or having a guest room who will stay over occasionally? compared to the joy and fun of having own kids in the house??? Since she is not enjoying her new motherhood, then why I be sharing the joy with her?

Pregnancy has come too easy for too many people - so easy until they become so insensitive to the people around them. Trust me! Such people really exist! They take things for granted! Sorry, I cant be as big hearted as you. I tried! But the feelings sucked!!!!

If I ever get preggy one day (still crossing my fingers, today is my D29) - I will give my 300% to my baby. And yes, I will upgrade to 4bedrms.
 
Hi Just Faith,

Cool down! Like u,I tot,WTF,when i read the post.I beleive i was as agitated as u.it's a pity i didn't have time to reply immediately,otherwise i'll be as fiery as u.

Attigally yours,

Are u my friend whom i'm bitching abt? Let me ask u,have u ever carried a baby for 7 mths,preparing for birth anytime already,only to find one day that baby juz stopped kicking? everything was ready for the baby.i bought everything,including soap to shower! Hmm...did u post in the wrong thread? We are here to encourage one another,ppl who are in the same boat,ppl who are longing for a bbaby,ppl who have to deal with 10 000 other ladies ard them getting preggy.

anyway,Just Faith,

I totally agree with u when u say u'll give ur baby 300%.I think if u ask me,i'll even give up my life to have a baby for my hubby.i told my hubby if i do give birth and anything happens,choose to save the baby,not me.i've lived a very fruitful life already,let the baby start his/her beautiful life.And that part abt ur friend saying she's giving up her guest room...don't u juz wanna punch her? this coupld friend of mine announced on facebook to ppl not to envy her coz her house is now like a warzone.i think she's exgerrating.and this is a couple whom when i congratulated them on their 2nd baby,the hubby said,"one more mouth to feed". then y have a 2nd baby? i will be glad to slog all my life to feed my 3 or 4 kids i hope to have.i know ur frustration.it's like all these ppl don't treasure their babies,yet they are so easily blessed with a baby,right?

i'm kind of scared and excited now i can start trying.i'm excited coz it means new hope for me.i'm scared coz i don't know how frustrating this journey will be or how long it's going to take.the last journey lasted 9 mths,and it was a terrible 9 mths,i must say.
 
I missed my menses for 1 day. Saw a very faint positive line on 2 HPT. But I have this tickling feeling that my AF is reporting... how ah? why am i so contradicting? i m supposed to report at KKH on monday.
 
Just faith: I only had 1 m/c at a very early stage, about 4-5 wks. In fact, ultrasound couldn't see any "spot" (embroy) or even heartbeat. Maybe too early, or could be a chemical pregnancy. It was natural pregnancy. In fact, that time was my busy time @ work, so didn't anticipate I would get preggy, also very stressed and having bad cough, so taking medicine and all that. It was very traumatic, although it's a very early loss. Physically, not much pain, but the emotional loss was huge. That's why I admire monster's courage and positive attitude after going thru what she did.

Just faith: Just saw your new post. Sounds positive. If over the weekend, you still dun have AF, should be pretty positive and you can go KKH to do blood test on Monday. Good luck.

Attigal: Welcome to post. Hmm, maybe let me share my 2 cents worth. Think u might have misunderstood monster n faith. Based on our communications, I feel they/most of us, dun feel bitter against pple with kids, but we feel unfair that pple who have kids easily do not appreciate them. And we begrudge mainly pple who are supposed to be friends and who know you have gone thru a difficult time/had m/c, n still rub it in. That's what gets our blood boiling.

I agree with what you preach entirely attigal. And I also believe that though pple may have offended you indirectly or even purposely, I try to take things in my stride that it's always better to earn good karma.
 
Just Faith,

Yes, but think of it, people brisking in their joy aren't the most sensitive people around. Or they simply have no idea how hurting their remarks could be. What may seem harmless to them could be hurtful to you. And it doesn't make sense for them to go around pretending they are not pregnant or don't have a baby just to make woman who have not conceive feel better.

Monster,

No, I'm not the friend you have been bitching about. Do you honestly think she will be looking in here after delivering?

Hardly. I'm one of you ttc girls. No, I have not carried a 7th month baby before. But think about this, at least you have been pregnant before. As least you are capable of conceiving. That gives you a fighting chance.

For me, not even a BFP. In fact as of now, not even a positive opk. But I'm not giving up.

I just feel that all those unnecessary hurt and anger may make you feel slightly better for now, but at the end of the day, do you really feel better about yourself for having spoken ill of others?

The process of ttc is difficult enough, do you really need all those negative feelings to make you feel worse then before?

Monster, Just Faith,

seriously if you have such "toxic" friends who deliberately make such remarks to bring you both down, let them go and be a happier person without them.

I'm sorry if I had offended you both in my previous post. I'm a straightforward person, and I don't sugarcoat my words. It is not that I'm a big hearted person - I have simply accepted that 99.9% of the people in this world are no mother theresas. It makes it easier for me to accept them for who they are, and feel less anger and resentment this way. They aren't worth the energy I had to put in to feel angry over them. I rather spend that energy ttc
happy.gif
.

anyway I have said what I intend to say, and I hope my words have made sense. If not, well, baby dust to all of us, and just pretend I have never said anything.

Cheers.
 
bb_dreamz,

thanks for your comment, mainly I was hoping to that they will let go of these anger, because while we may not be able to stop those insensitive people from making stupid remarks, we can chose to be gracious and not let them affect us. I believe staying positive will also help bring on a BFP.

happy.gif
 
Hi Girls..

I am too a silent reader.. went without protection for 6 months with no results but seriously trying only in May and with blessings strike in June but unfortunately my babies were too beautiful for earth and I suffered a mc 3 weeks ago. I like the support here because picks up loads of tips.

However until 3 weeks ago I didnt understand how come some people can feel strongly about a miscarriage because for most it is like a baby you never held physical, smell and see before. After my mc I totally understand the pain that some of the girls have and it is a perfectly normal way of people dealing with grieve. It is not something we can control because we cannot help but be upset. As much as karma etc is involved I think is mindless release in a forum while we keep a straight font in our regular life.

Frankly I would rather not have a miscarriage but have a longer TTC period because the loss and emotional pain is too massive that I really wish upon no one. Only when you have went through would you understand the way how some of us vent in the forum. We get sensitive easily and is really not within our control. I lost my babes at 12 weeks and it is so painful I really cannot imagine the loss that monster felt after the stillbirth. My mum for one suffered 1 when my supposed elder sister was due in a couple of weeks. What I heard from her was that she was so depressed that she refuse food and almost mental breakdown. The anguish we can never understand unless we are in their shoes.

Having said that I hope everyone graduate from this thread gradually to the mothers to be thread. That will be a nice ending =)
 
Ling,

Thanks for your post.

No worries - we are only here to share our frustrations, venger etc. But our common goal is the same. Ie. to conceive and have own kids.

Baby dust to all! I really hope I catch one this time. I am turning 35 soon... really not much time left.
 
hi girls, hope u all still rem me

Hi joanne, i read from other thread abt ur case.. sorry for the loss.. pls take good care after the D&C.. btw, after my 2nd m/c, my bbt is getting alot better on this 3rd cycle with tcm.. hope my health can be much better and let me conceive naturally soon or ready for my 2nd round of ivf embarkment.. so u too, continue go for tcm ya, coz each m/c can be demaging to our health

hi faith, ur case looks promising with faint line.. how's the update today?

hi ladies, i read the postings.. i do agree that those who conceive easily may not mean to hurt us.. bt they are definitely 生在福中不知福...

god give them the most beautiful and precious treasure and precious yet complain on those little things... whereas for us who work soooo hard to have one, yet still unanswered..

some also complain abt how bad their MS is, when i asked for so much to have very bad MS.. unfortunately, my 2 cases little symptons just diminished and prove that they are leaving me.. if i have a choice, i do not mind bad ms till i need hospitalised etc..

so i hope those fortunate one learn and treasure what they have
 
Good afternoon ladies,

Just Faith,

If u c a positive line,it's likely that IT'S POSITIVE.I shall wait until u really missed ur AF,then i shall congratulate u.I don't want to make u happy,only realise it's not the way we thought it's going to turn out,okie.but i'm really happy for u.i feel ur nervousness,u know? haha

bb,

I want to hug u for writing that post.Thank you.I think u have expressed wat most of us here feel.

Ling,

I'm sorry to hear of wat u have to go thru'.I teared when i read ur post coz i know exactly when u meant when u mentioned abt the emotional pain.Did i read correctly that u mentioned 'babies'? were u conceiving twins? if yes,oh dear,i can really feel ur disappointment.And i also agree with u abt 'mindless release' here,while leading a normal life.yah,i think i'm juz on autopilot.haha.but things have improved so much since the stillbirth.i was really afraid i'll fall into depression,and i did everything i could to prevent this.and i'm proud to say i did it by myself,even my hubby didn't help me.i let him go on this coz i thinik he had a very tough time coping on his own too.my hubby was badly affected by the m/c.i think i was more prepared coz there were already indicaations of restricted growth.but our little one fought hard,and kept growing,but didn't make it pass wk 9.still,i thank the baby for having that fighting spirit.the 2nd preg did give me confidence that i can conceive naturally again.and it gave me a much needed break fr ttc.
 
I posted and then read Gillian's post.

Joanne darling,

I'm sorry to hear abt ur loss.how are u coping? and how is ur fam coping? my heart goes out to u,esp after having been thru' so much.hang in there,ur 'one day' will come again.

Gillian,

I only rem abt ur most recent loss.i think when i joined the forum,u were ttc 2nd time.I didn't know u went thru' IVF.Who is ur gynae? my gynae was so happy i was throwing up.sometimes,i wonder if it's pyschological or indeed MS.my friend (who is also a doc) who walked me thru' this journey is also so happy i was throwing up.my gynae even said,"don't stop throwing up." it's a sign of increasing hormonal levels.and she was also so happy i was feeling tired.so funny,right? like u,i am willling to throw up until i end up in hospital.anything for a healthy,kicking,screaming baby.doesn't matter if my baby cries all night,i think i'm prepared to care for him/her.i think u will do the same.i think everyone here will do the same
 
Hi Monster,

Unfortunately I really did lost a set of twins. I dont think the pain of losing 1 baby is any lesser than a mother who lost 2 at 1 time. The pain and anguish is the same and it just ebbed into us over time which I loath. At times you feel you are fine but when you have quiet time you think how far you should be in the pregnancy and all the nonsense. Than we feel vengeful and envious of anything that is pregnant and worse still when they complain about everything big and small.

I guess the pain of TTC is there.. but to suffer losses and to trot on a difficult path to TTC really take too much out of us.

We will reach there someday and if we dont we will too accept fate although with a grimace!
 
Monster,

I am very tempted to test on HPT again today. Do or die - I must see swee swee positive. The positive line I saw was too faint. But I really did see faint positive line. My bbt has dropped to 36.7 - this is why I dun feel confident.

The only way to confirm is to wait till monday. And I am taking folic acid (oral) daily and progesterone (inserted into rectrum 2 times a day).
 
hi ladies
am on & off silent reader for this thread.

Just Faith
I am very excited for u even though I dun know u. It's always great to hear someone BFP especially u gals who have made every effort to make it happen.

u did iui or ivf? Mon BT issit? then wait for THE DAY bah.
 


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