Dear Heartbeats, you have been so sweet and showing me so much concerns that I felt obliged to reply…thank you for having me in your thots.. (you have been in my thots too!)… In fact, I was also v grateful to many sisters (eg. Sashamama, Michelle, Catherine, Qing and many others… sorry if I have forgotten your names... and oh yes, Angelxuan too) who have prayed for me and my babies, and who have lent their support and love in times of my down moments (I know all of you have your own challenges to handle too). I missed you all, and I miss my happy chatty self in the forum… I am ok… I went ahead with my Oscar scan at KKH last wed (although I already did my first one at TMC).. In my heart, I was still praying and hoping that the outcome will turn out better… Alas, it turned out worse.. My risk at KKH is 1:6, as against 1:10 in TMC… how to lift up and be happy? I was very depressed again… the more I goggled, the more stress and depressed I become… my reading from NT scan was ok, but my blood test was a killer… of the 2 components tested, my free beta hcg was still ok, but my PAPP-A reading was terribly low, at 0.0558 MoM… I asked the counselor who spoke to me if she has seen such low figure, she admitted she hasn’t come across such low figure.. the norm shd be 1 (some more she said with twins the figure shd be higher than 1)… I goggled and hardly come across any body with such low figure (only very few)… low PAPP-A is not just associated with abnormalities, but also posed serious implications in pregnancy, such as still birth, premature birth, PE, etc etc… it doesn’t sound good at all..
With time, I am feeling better now.. I will be having my genetic scan at Camden next wed.. actually wanted to reschedule to earlier but no slot… from my Oscar scan at KKH, they date my babies as 1 week advance.. so my original EDD was changed from 5 Oct to 28 Sep… I can only pray and hope for the best, and be mentally prepared for the worst… easier said than done… in any case, I have also fixed my anmio test on 24 apr… I cant maintain my sanity not knowing if my babies are going to be ok… I start to “zi bao zi qi” a bit, drink half cup of coffee per day and also small cups of coke as and when I feel like it… my hubby has appeared ok all this while.. that day I asked him if he was worried at all, he paused a while and admitted he was worried.. he asked me to stay positive.. I think his main concern is mainly me and my well-being… he is so loving…
heartbeats, know you have spotting recently.. must really take good care ok… for me, I am still slogging at work… last nite was our anniversary event.. so today can laze a bit after the mad rush…