(2012/05) May 2012

Hey ladies, been reading a lot about some of you who are SAHMs... Do you prefer it so far, to being a working mom?

I just got a job offer today by an ex-boss and the job he's offering me is working from home one... The terms are actually very good but I'm not sure if I can get used to working from home and taking care of baby in future. Is this kind of arrangement beneficial? Would appreciate any input, thanks.
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Star,
Yay! U r #4! And counting... hopefully
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Peaberry,
This is your first bb? I think working from home is precious. It allows u to bring in the bacon but at the same time keeping an arm's length with the kids.

But of course at the same time unless the nature of yr work is very flexible, it might be hard to juggle work, bb care n household chores at the same time.

Caring for a bb is relatively easy. I think. Need to feed, sleep, clean, cuddle n play. But they spend alot of time asleep. When they start to flip, crawl, cruise, climb etc is another story. Need to keep an eye on them unless u want to keep them "contained" somewhere all the time. When they start on solids, thats another consideration. Have to cook separately, puree, wash dishes, and clean bb n even furniture sometimes. Haha..

Moral of the story - take up the job offer but get a helper?
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Actually all sahms, unless they have helpers/stay w in-laws etc, are all working from home. As homemakers - we cook, clean, do laundry, wash... there's plenty of "work" to do. Hahaha... comforting myself. Salary all in the form of hugs, kisses n laughter with the kids.
 
Runningmuff, I don regret it either...
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but my plan is after my helper come and it situation allows.. I might look for temp jobs... At least can earn some extra cash at the same time hv some adult interactions like u said. Haha!

I'm staying at Toa Payoh... Haha! Not helping at all indeed..

Waving to *.* Star *.* !!! hehe!

Peaberry, I tot it's a good chance esp if the offer is good... But u must be sure tat u are able to concentrate on ur work when u need to.. it's a very good chance to be able work, earn cash and at the same time not miss out anything about ur child.
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Just sharing my exprience... I like to do some simple crafts and sewing when time allows, but I always hv to wait till my little one goes for nap or at night after she sleeps (I will usually work till way pass midnight) den I'll be able to do my stuff... If not she will come and disturb, mess things up and I most of the time I can't concentrate at all... This might be something u wanna consider about.
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Peaberry,
What i meant by the nature of work being flexible is - if u need to take a conference call at a certain time n bb is crying at home, it can be pretty distracting. But if u can choose to work only when bb is sleeping etc, then it will be alot easier.

Just my 2 cents.....
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Micteo,
Toa Payoh is indeed a bit far... haha... nvr mind. I am sure got chance to meet up. Just that if u stay like next street it will be so much easier.

I am working part time. Coaching in a sch. So it gives me a break fr the kids at times while doing something i enjoy n earn money too. In laws come over for those few hours when i am away. And I really treasure this "break"!!
 
peaberry - my thoughts about working from home. I've been doing it for the past 3 years - started from working from home twice a week, and now, I only go in to office once a week, or sometimes, once in every 2 weeks.

Initially, you'll feel more tired working from home than in office. At home, there's no stopping by someone's workstation and chit chatting, going for lunches together, taking a coffee break, etc etc. So it's more tiring working from home than in office. Also, though you save on travelling time, you'll tend to work beyond the office hours.

When baby is still young, it's still not too bad. Cos most of baby's time is napping. When your baby is like a year old, they want your attention all the time! Even picking up phone calls, doing conference calls, is a prob, cos my son is there snatching the phone from me. Or picking up the phone for me!

Of cos, it all depends on how you manage and if you have any helper at all. However if you are alone with baby, I think it's pretty tough...

I work from home, but main caregiver is my hubby cos my hubby quits his job to look after my son..
 
Runningmuff, very true... But some days... I'm just plain lazy and not do anything at all just play with my girl... Hahah!

Honestly money is another prob... Esp hb is the only person earning... Sometimes I really wanted something but can't... Can only drool over it.. And tell myself to get over it.. Sad.
 
runningmuff, yes it's my first child so in a sense, am not sure what to expect. We're def getting a CL but not sure about a helper yet. I'm a bit worried about space cos we stay in a 4-room flat and only have one room for the baby... I agree that being a SAHM is a full-time job in itself!

micteo, I understand what you mean. There's also still work to be done - emails to liaise, MSN/Skype conference calls. So it's a balancing act I think, same for full-time working mums. I wonder if I'll get used to all the flexibility! Need a lot of discipline too.

Thank you both for your kind advice!
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Re: Tummy size
Yes. Tummy size does not relate with size of baby. I remember piggywiggy was super small compared to many of us even at our last meet up before delivery and yet, her baby was no smaller than everyone else.


stobeli:
The food is ok. Quite nice. You can also tell them some things which you dun eat. Like frog legs. No I dun mean cater from week 2. I mean cater 2 meals for week 1, then ask them change to 1 meal from week 2 onwards. They count by total number of meals. So I took a 14x2 package = 28 meals. You can request for a trial meal at $30 before you decide. :p


piggywiggy:
Yah I remember we used to be online at 3-4am mostly. MSN, and thread was super active at that time. All wake up to pump. I think I was one of the first few to drop off coz I latch (and sleep)... Heehee... I remember dunno who was saying that we just have to remember that somewhere in Singapore, there is at least 1 other mummy doing the same thing as us at that time.


Crystalline:
I have 2 kids + 1 maid & I survive in a Vios. Just need to manage. If need to go out with my parents, they have a 7 seater Wish though.
 
Peaberry,
No problem... other mummies will share their experience too! Thats the point of the forum. And its a very good "problem" that u have here. Not many ppl will have this kind of chance! Talk it thru with yr hb. Most impt.

KRC,
Wow... i am so envious of yr kid/kids! Both daddy AND mummy at home all the time!! Most families in singapore has the opposite situation.

Tummy size,
I don't know how big my tummies were... but for my #2 i gained only 9kg overall. And she was 3.6kg at birth. Quite a big bb. Thank God quite a bit of weight went to her instead of me
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Hopefully it will be the same this time round
 
OrangeBb: same here.. i also go to the amk clinic on sat for my appts...
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we might just bump into each other in one of these days.. hehe

Vanilla: ya.. suspect those might be fetal movements.. am also starting to feel 'sudden' movements inside... smtimes its like a twitch or double beat at the side of the tummy.. guess it will be more obvious in the months to come...
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Re: appetite
My appetite has been good all along.. been eating like crazy.. haiz.. though i will have this very tight feeling after meals if i overeat. But i do get hungry easily... so i try to 'control' my meals intake... so hopefully can help to control my weight increase also..

Re: tummy showing
My tummy also showing early.. in fact i think i look like a 5-6mths preggy looking at the size of the tummy..lol.. abit crazy.. but i can feel the skin is stretching again.. tightness around the tummy and sometimes it itch...

Re: Leg cramps at night
I'm starting to experience leg cramps at night..despite lifting my legs on a bolster when i sleep.. the feeling is terrible man.. suddenly woke up to the pain of the cramps
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Any ways to lessen the pain or minimise cramps???

Im also experiencing pain around my right hip area.. esp when i lie down or sit down... dunno izzit because of the ligaments or wad... only know it's gonna get worse when the tummy gets bigger.. haiz..
 
hEy ICez,

Leg Cramps:
Make sure you cover up your legs at night and stretch your legs through out the day.. Also, try to eat more foods rich in magnesium and calcium like dark leafy veg, beans, nuts and seeds (pumpkin/sunflower). Magnesium helps to relax the muscles.

Hope this helps!
(Copy frm Jun's thread)
 
Re: working from home,

If I had tis chance I'll do it.. Cuz I can stay at home and care for my little one and as e same time I can earn money and can buy things without thinking.. I mean spending out owe earned money and hb money is diff. Spend hb money u need to spent wisely but owe money I wan to buy wat jiu buy wat.. No need to even explain to him.. In another words no need to see his face la.. Haa..

Then another perspective will be ur financial status will be more stable and u guys can have lot more choices ma.. Cuz more money.. =D

Re: Fetal movements,
Ya.. I Dun get it everyday la.. But it's really an amazing feeling.. =D looking forward to feel more!! Haa..

Re: tummy,
I dunno if it's fats or really bigger.. Haa.. Cuz I dun have a flat tummy to start wif.. So haiz.. =(
 
Vanilla: U shld keep changing ur facial towel if ur skin is that sensitive. I was using kiehls b4 preg #1. after preg my scalp n skin also change. A lot of shampoo not suitable. Pimple pop a bit, thus i changed my skincare to Avene. Love it n still using it.

Runningmuff: ya quite close. i am moving hse next wk. We got a place 5min walk away fr in laws. So i guess my mil will come ard to help. Thinking of sending #1 to halfday classes nearby home next yr.

I havent decide when to go back work. Hub ask me the same question. I told him when my bb grew up n start to ask many question, i am goin to run away n hire a tuition teacher to teach him.

As at now, 2 will do unless accident. Haha

Vanilla: hub also say i pui pui. terrible

Peaberry: u can only do work when bb is asleep. As bb is quite attention seeking, plus hsework....hmmm. I already hav a pt cleaner that comes in once a wk n irobot to vacumm daily. I find no time in watching tv. Mayb jus a short while w hub. But then again, mayb u will find a way. For eg working while bb is playing in playard or playpen.

I cant even use laptop as my boy is extremely interested in it. If i sit on the table to eat or use laptop, he'll b hovering ard baby talking n whine. My boy is a lil explorer now. N extremely talkative though its all baby talk.

Runningmuff is right. Get a helper. It cost ard $700 a mth. If ur job can earn more than that, so y not?

Peaberry. My ex helper sleeps in the same room w my baby. She takes care of him at nite. Its not a bad idea coz baby do wakes up at nite, n she can immediately attend to bb n make them quiet.

Anybody goin yoga/pilate?
Micteo: i stay in bishan.
 
Just off work. Have to take train home as hubby need to clear work cos tomorrow he took leave to go amnio with me.

Think my tummy still not bad at 16 weeks as no one give seat to me ..... *sob sob*

I'm getting quite excited tomorrow as so fast can know gender.
Any mummies going TMC tomorrow around noon ?
 
Dear all,

Re: tummy
I think it's showing but I cannot figure whether it's 'correct'. I was thinking beanie should be at the lower abdomen, so when the upper is showing I believe it's due to fats accumulated due to over eating??

Re: fetal movement,
I.felt it a few times last week but this week nothing at all. So I hope everything should be good ?

Re: appetite
Omg... It's pretty much on the good side for me but I will try to avoid those oily stuffs... Now I really worry abt my weight gain... I sometimes run into depression when I look into the mirror
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Family Car
Thanks mummies for your responses. Actually can make do with a 5 seater but hb prefers a 7 seater. Though the car will be bigger but it's considered a downgrade cos the Stream he is eyeing is less powerful than the current car. But no choice ya, family needs come first. Other than my maid, sometimes we do go out for meals with either his mum, if not my dad and bro, so easier when we have a bigger car.

piggy wiggy,
now a 1-2 year old Stream costs more than $100k, so do shop around for the best deal possible. Not gonna get a new one cos the annual depreciation for a 'liability' like a car is crazy!

Tummy Showing
Yeah my tummy is ballooning very fast this time round. For my #1, my tummy wasn't even really showing at 4months. Now, unless I wear very loose fitting clothes, can see the tummy lor. Hopefully the baby won't be too big....

Older Kids Throwing Tantrums
I realized my 31 mth old girl is behaving a lot worse these 2 months and my colleague told me it could be a sign of jealously towards her unborn sibling. Not sure whether any mummies experience this too and whether it's true?
 
I'm still experiencing MS leh, still vomit at least a few times a day, dunno when this will end sighs. Weight is same as before pregnancy if not lighter and craving for Pokka Green Tea everyday and must eat 1 Magnum daily lol! Hopefully the MS will subside before my Bali trip next month else really sianz....
 
OrangeBB, we are near!!! Kekeke! Me me! I'm planning to sign up for yoga.. Since already in 2tri shld be the right time to start on some workout... :D

Do u hv any place in mind?
 
Crystalline, my girl too... Sometimes she can be the sweetest little thing in the world.. But at times she just drives me mad! Very tempted to get a cane for her!
 
micteo,
Haha same, I wonder is it the horrible three stage? I am going to get a cane THIS weekend, must use it to scare her. Today she is very well behaved cos I am at home today and kept telling her I gonna buy cane for her and she is scared. So it works. ;)
 
Crystalline, Wahahah! Me too! I've been threatening her tat I'm going downstairs to buy cane for her I even ask her to choose a colour.. Haha! Work wonders! But I seriously going to get it already.. Haha!
 
I think i should be joining the sahm club here, haha.. am doing private tuition from home but stopped since hols started, and won't be taking any students for the next year... yeah, definitely miss the adult interaction too!

KRC - yeah, must be nice to have both parents at home all the time!

second trimester exercise... anyone staying in the east and wanting to do some swimming?
I've just got myself a new swimsuit for preggers and can't wait to try it out! heh
 
wah so hot today! really busy now as its my peak.. but i m off for the next 2 days cos its my boy's bday tmr!!

Re: working from home
If i have the chance, i would prefer to work from home. unlike some ppl, i actually concentrate better at home that outside. haha.. i m the super distracted type. ppl walk past i will look up. for those SAHMs, if u have an opportunity to work at home and earn some money, i think this is impt cos hbs will NEVER understand why we spend money to buy things for our kiddos.. right now we buy clothes, then shoes, then bags then water bottles and TOYS! it nv seems enough if u get what i mean, esp when u see other mommies buying for their kids. having a bit of pocket money is also gd in the sense that u know u are not 100% dependent on ur hb.. dun need to see his face if u wanna buy something that to u is impt, but to him is frivolous. trust me, the 2nd and 3rd time mommies will be recommending so many things to first time mommies to buy! :D

Re: tummy
I'm soooo much bigger than i was last time.. my current size is abt what i was at 24 wks for #1! piangzz... vanilla, ur hb is just poking fun at u.. haha.. my hb also can't believe i m so big at this stage.. zzzzz u know for my old thread, we actually took photos of our tummies and posted it on the forum??! hahaha.. i took the MRT today and nobody gave up a seat for me though..

Crystalline, what car are u guys driving now? Like u, i have a maid and I do drive around quite oftn.. two carseats + maid behind kinda pack too.. i dun really like having my son (who is on booster) to seat in the passenger seat in front cos if there's accident, the chances of him getting hurt is much higher than having him seated behind. similarly, if i do get a Stream, it won't be as powerful as my current car which is rather impt for me cos i m a speed freak.. haha.. ya btw me and my hb, i m the car slut not him. that's why i m thinking of the Odysessy cos the horsepower is bigger.

Erm, I have no had any adverse reaction from my boy, just that he is a lot more affectionate towards me.. just yesterday when hb and I were discussing abt 2 kids routine, my boy said "when baby comes out, I will take care of him!"

Icez, Angela is right. u need to keep stretching ur feet throughout the day and take in more minerals.
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i also have leg cramps occasionally but still manageable..
 
re: complexion,
I have already change my skincare to acne care but still no difference. I stop wearing blush on as my breakout is mostly on cheek area. Still wearing concealer (But those that acts as an acne lotion at the same time). But now seriously gonna go to see my doctor. My skin aint that great to start with, in the past prone to acne etc... so i think better go to see dermatologist.

Orange,
My work place is mostly guys so they don't notice. All the ones i have told so far did not expect anything cause I am always wearing those dresses with flare type of skirt - great to hide bumps ! :p

Mummies with tots,
Have you told your #1/#2 that you are expecting or there is a baby on the way? I am thinking when is the right time... I told my son that we will have a baby and yesterday he told me he wants a sister... i don't know the gender yet so I just smiled... A bit difficult to tell him coz he's at the why2 stage, and he started asking why are we having a baby? why is there a baby in your tummy? etc etc... headache... gotta find more creative answers...
 
Last nite i straightened out my legs, covered w/ blanket & slp. Did really work. I didn't get any leg cramps! Heh heh. But b4 that i asked my huBBy to massage my calves b4 bedtime so maybe that helped too. ^^

Ohhh cut down on cold drinks. Reduces leg cramps too.
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Icez: ya we may bump into each other. When is ur next visit?

Micteo: i don hav a place in mind yet. N gotta arrange to park my boy w in laws b4 heading out.

Tummy: mine is bigger too although i din eat much.

Tute: i second u on seeing doc. Go go!
 
Hey ladies, thanks for the feedback re working from home. I'm actually holding a full-time managerial position right now so the workload and stress is pretty crazy. The new job offer is a senior manager role, but a lot less traveling. I'm really sick of flying around. Just came back from a LA trip a few weeks ago.

I'll def explore this new offer and make sure the terms are good enough for me to jump ship. Will also discuss with DH how we can best work this out, especially with caring for the bb. Thanks all again!
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piggywiggy, the Odyssey is a great drive! I like it better than the Stream and Airwave too.

ICez, make sure your room isn't too cold when you sleep too. My air con was at full blast a few nights ago and I woke up with leg cramps. Literally woke up yelling in pain and DH got a shock. Also try wearing warm socks?
 
Piggy: agree that Odyssey is a great drive too! Was actually considering of a 7-seater too but current market seems abit too 'crazy' to change rides nw esp with the high price!

For mummies with 2 or more kids, how do you all seat the kids in the car? both strapped up in car seat at the back with you in the middle? Am wondering how should i seat the kids when #2 is out since #1 seems still early to change her into booster seat...any suggestions?

Re: Leg cramps
Tks Angela & piggy for the advice.. will try taking more of those types of food! Last night was ok.. no cramps.. when i feel the 'cramp' is coming, i restraint myself from tensing my legs then its ok..haiz.. only remb the cramps coming in much later during my #1 preg... wonder why it came so early this time round..
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Just curious, does banana cause leg cramp? coz i had banana the other day and that night i had cramps.. keke.. just trying to find some correlation..:p

Orangebb: my next appt is this coming sat, 26/12. how about u?

Crystalline: my #1 also becomes more cranky & 'yan or' when we first found out i am preggy.. seems to always want me to carry her and will run to hug me from behind when she sees me. Not too sure if it's pure coincidence or she's trying to get my attention. Did try telling her that a baby is inside my stomach. At first she doesnt seems to understand and will always walk away.. recently been telling her and she will kiss my belly.. so also dunno if she really knows what is going on. But funny thing is DH tried the same thing on her the other night and my girl started hitting his tummy with both hands instead of kissing.. haha.. such a funny sight!
 
hi mommies.. been a while since i login.. hehe.. was busy watching tvb dramas and finally finished chasing it up to date.. haha...

tummy showing: mine is showing too! my hubby says its very nice, and he keep on touching it n talking to bb.. hahhaa.. he is also putting on some weight! hahahahahaha... n becos of this, i have jus bought some maternity shorts.. no choice le.. now the feeling of "something" in the tummy is very real and sometimes i feel like it's blocking my movements.. kekeke... oops.. sometimes i think i'm jus getting fatter..

anyway, i bought it toa payoh, about $29.90 for shorts and $32.90 for long pants.. quality is ok la, can wear until after birth.. can try also, but the fitting room abit small.. it's at toa payoh central blk 185.. the shop sells normal clothes, but have maternity clothes hiding at one corner, with 2 preggy mannequins.. can go chck it out.. my fren intro-ed me..

gg to see little bb later.. so exciting!! cant wait to see bb.. kekeke.. hopefully bb is cooperative n dun cross legs!!!
 
piggy - that's nice that your boy is so sweet
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icez - hmm, sounds like your girl does understand what's going on leh!

Zara - sounds like good buys! too bad i seldom venture north...
have fun seeing bb! all the best! :D
 
Icez: mine is dec3. Think after that he is not ard. So this visit is 3wks after the last rd.

Ur daughter funny la. Hit ur hub tummy instead. Hahaha

Peaberry: good luck! If i were u i may take the offer too n get a helper at home. If cannot tahan, then quit.
 
piggy wiggy,
My hb is driving a Mitsubishi colt plus turbo now, Stream is bigger cc but not as powerful cos he did some mods to his current ride too. Actually I'm happy he gets a less powerful car as I hate the way he drives sometimes. I seldom drive and I'm the kiasi type lol. Yeah I also think it's very dangerous to compromise the kiddos' safety with no car seat or seated in front. My girl is almost 3 but she is the petite type cos she weighs only around 10kg, dun think she can fit into a booster.
How old is your boy? He is so sweet!
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Peaberry, icez,
Odyssey is definitely better but think fuel consumption is higher, my hb needs to go Changi and Tuas for work so fuel costs is a concern, will just stick to Stream for now Hee...
 
yikes... down with flu!!! friends, family n neighbours have been getting it the past week, and i thought i was getting away with not catching it! tough luck! dh got it two days ago, and now i'm feeling it!! no escape...
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Mommies out there... take care! The flu bug seems to be around!
 
OrangeBB, I'm still looking around too... Most likely will take up weekend class so hb can take over instead of bringing my girl over to my mum's, bit troublesome... :p I'll keep u posted if I manage to find a place.
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actually location quite impt too.. I'm hoping to find one somewhere in town...
 
Icez:
Relook your salt intake as too much salt in your diet can lead to worst leg cramps.


crystalline:
Yes kids can tell when there is another on the way. My #1 insisted that there is a baby in my tummy before I even confirm my pregnancy. Then she also confirmed the gender (insisted that its didi) before I scanned and I think I already knew quite early - cannot remember if its 13 weeks. She responds positively to siblings - thank God. My #2... hmmm.... that is another problem...


Re: 2 kids or more - seating arrangement
My #1 is seated in a type of car seat for 1 year and above. It is smaller than those infant car seat but still has 5 point strap. I bought this when #2 was on the way. Both car seats are in the back, maid or myself just squeeze in between.
 
Hi everyone , i am new in this forum , due in May 2012 too.
I have 2 lovely boys. Just found out Baby #3 is another boy - faint! Was hoping for a girl to balance all that rowdiness at home.
Anyone else going to have 3 kids of the same gender ? how do you plan to cope?
 
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PM me if keen. Thanks
 
hi all..
saw bb yday and she's so active kicking!! and yes.. bb is a girl!! gynae say 99.99% girl.. got nothing sticking out.. only saw 3 lines.. kekeke... daddy already bought her stuffs yday.. couldnt wait.. ekke....

rosegal: where u stay? my fren also told me about this shop in tampines..shopname is My wardrobe collection #01-12. east link tht connects interchange to mrt.. i dunno the prices thou.. =)
 
Does the older child really have the ability to predict the gender of the unborn?

Really curious cos I do not know the gender yet.

Just seen Dr Ang and first time I waited less then 10min!!! :)
 
Prediction from older child - doesn't work for me. My boy said that I'm carrying a baby girl.. but it turns out to be a boy. But he did say he prefers a baby boy though...
 
The moment i know i was preg (4 weeks only), i ald share the news with my girl (19mths), told her that mummy has a baby in the tummy... and ask her she wants a di-di or mei-mei... Guess what she replied me... she said kor-kor... Hubby & i laughted and replied her that i cannot give her a kor-kor la... haha... anyway, since young my girl prefer male... she prefer to play with male and let male carry her...

but anyway, she is also right about the gender la... she will be having a di-di... heehee...
 
Hi, anyone of you experiencing sharp pain at the lower tummy? Suddenly have at since this morning 4am when I wake up to pee. It feels more intense when I stand up or go to the toilet. There is no bleeding or whatever, nt sure if it's due to the stretching. Any idea? Shld I visit the gynae? Plz advise.. Kind of worried nw.
 
babyfran, I feel that sometimes especially if I get up too quickly. Think it's round ligament pain and nothing to worry about unless the pain is persistent and accompanied by bleeding... Take care!
 
Baby Prediction also doesnt work for me either.

My gal says I have a di di in the tummy. But it's a Mei Mei instead. She still keep saying its di di after we break the news to her. Guess it will take her sometime to get over it .

Mei Mei can now inherit jie jie's nice clothes liao ! Probably sisters can bond better than bros.
 


baby prediction worked.. my fren's son says i have a meimei.. and it is! a lot of my frens, my dad, my FIL all thought it is a boy, even i was fooled into it! only my fren's son is right! ahhaha... but he predicted my other pregnant fren wrongly.. keke...

babyfran: sometimes i also expereience that.. like a pain/ stretch.. but after i move around for awhile slowly, i'm fine.. no bleeding as well...
 
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