(2011/05) May 2011

I am coming down with flu and cannot hold my bb much today. Called my mum hint hint her to come over to help but she told me to leave bb in maid’s care. Aiyah…



Jenny: Hang in there. I believe your bb will start to smile more when he’s fully recovered from flu. My heart melts when I saw my bb breaks into a radiant smile when he sees me. My mil only cares for her daughter’s girl who is now already 6. I think it is better for your hb to ask your MIL to help than you speak up yourself.



Sylvia: I am glad to follow this thread coz I picked up a lot of info/tips from the mummies here which I do not know even as 2nd time mum. Let’s Jia You together and thank you Mummies here for sharing.



Cloud: Glad your girl is fine now. Don’t put all the blame on yourself not to BF.



Moomum: PD advised me to start when bb takes 2nd dose of 6-in-1 and that is around 3month plus.



V: Thanks for your note. I saw the BP organizer is posting for first time so I did not buy in the end. Will check out the stores to get a better feel for the toys before buying.

 


Jenny: no la the tub of water is newly filled in but she uses the same tub to wash clothes also...arrrgghhh!! I just wanna look after my girl myself I guess.. The things she say she also dun do de.. Haiz.. My hb say I keep SMS-ing 'bad' stuff to him... So I won't msg him anymore lor.. Let him see for himself when he come home..



Lilfly: this one is new seller and she kept ignoring the an on the authenticity of the products if u realize.. I was checking w the older seller whose thread has been closed than I found out but at least she was willing to tell me where the items came from...



Precious: my girl is getting her jabs next mth so it's after she turns 4mo...

 
Had fun at today's gathering, maybe group was smaller so much easier to talk to all mummies!

Thks Arisz for organising. Wat time did u all stay till? Apple caught me in the basement still shopping away... Hehe



Val, hi5 my ger also needs to bao bao one. Must bao bao every nap. Put her down she sleeps 15 mins only. But the FP rocker chair i got was good, she can take at least 1 nap in there in the day, free my hands up



Sylvia i am very encouraged by your post, my bottle battle will start soon too. I am preping myself tat i will take 2 weeks too.

Can i check

1) did u latch at all when u were training her on the bottle?

2) all feed give bottle including night feeds?

3) the 2 weeja give bottle every day eben during weekend?

4) so u pumping throughout the day while she takes the bottle?

5) and which bottle are u using?

I dreading the time when i start the battle with my ger

 
Mummies, I'm so vexed looking @the change in my girl's behavior... Can feel that she's feeling insecure & keep wanting to cling on me.. She's even worst than during my pregnancy, maybe wanting to seek my attention. These few nites, she kept having nitemares... See her behaving like this really makes me heart pain.. Wonder is it my mum cause her to behave this way.... Now my mum is forcing herto potty train. Last sat, she makes j wore panty to go gaigai for 3 hours & never pee... Even when she reached home, refused to pee even brought her to washroom! Only when she's wearing her diaper then she starts to pee... Told my mum don't force her as she has controlled her bladder which is not good for her... My mum rebuked that she's going to make j diaperless. She's seems to be proud that she has accomplish certain achievement! She didn't realized that she's incurred a fear in her granddaughter.

 
Dolly think its a stressful time for J now. With new didi n weanng of her pacy. Too many things happening n she may not be able to deal with it. Why does ur mum want to train J to go diaperless now? Can train after 3 yrs old its no hurry. N seems like shevmay not be ready now n its true tat its no good for her to control. But she seems to be able to control her bladder very wellnleh. But i think better ask ur mum to take it easy first. And if she really want to potty train her, train at hm n not when u all are going out. So stressful for her lor

 
Also J is in CC now right? They will help to train her so dun have to worry.



Btw wanna answer On your pump. The yellow membrane is not suppose to flap leh. If flapping means the cover loose. Also make sure ur tubing is as straight as possible. Curled tubbing will decrease suction power. U can test if its the problem with the suction/pump by closing one end ( to become single pump) then without connecting the other end to the bottle u switch on the pump n feel with ur finger if there is any suction power. If there is, means ue body part not tightly assembled.

 
Coloring of hair: earlier on I went to c my GP regarding my sore eye n I asked him if still can bf if colored hair.. He replied "no prob on tat"... Mummies.. FYI.. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Starfruit, we also think that most probably she can't handle too much things @ one go...



Starfruit, I've tried each side by doing single pump. Only one of the valve is not working but it's tighten leh..

 
Dolly - J is still young and she might not ready to do diaperless yet. Don't stress her further..holding on her bladder is bad. My colleague's son got phobia passing urine & everytime holding on his bladder coz in kindy the teacher doesn't allow them to go individually, he is 5 now. And his condition getting serious till they r seeing psychologist to help him. So pls tell your mum don't push her further, it will harm her developement.

 
hi dolly, i believe u agree that potty training should only be done when a child is ready and given the situation, while little J may be ready, she seems to be overwhelmed with coping with so many changes that it is becoming stressful for her.



Think the issue is how to communicate to yr mum? i can understand her pride in being able to train J so it will be quite difficult to get thru to her if u just ask her to stop the training.. My suggestion is to have a talk with yr mum, discuss what u have observed in J - her behaviourial changes or noticeable lowering of self-esteem patterns etc. Express your fears and concerns. Think when you talk to yr mum in from a worried parent point-of-view, she might be more receptive?



As for little J- how about indulging her in some of her favourite activities. Things that she is very good at, and let her re-build her confidence. Like if she is good at coloring or singing or dancing, ask her to draw and display her works all around the house. Get family members to praise her works and her efforts. If she likes singing/dancing, ask her to perform for u like a mini concert. Record it and watch it on TV and make her feel like she is appreciated. Just find a way to showcase her interests/talents and get more people roped in to affirm her efforts.



Some kids thrive on praise and attention, especially when its based on something concrete that they have done. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Dolly: it may be a tear in the membrane... How u remove the membrane when u wash? Don't pull it out from the sides, put ur finger in and push it out from inside..will prevent a tear in the where the stub is.. Check the membrane and change if there's a tear...

 
Starfruit: I was ready to throw in the towel when she suddenly decided to take the bottle. Hope it'll be easier for u! To reply ur qns:



1) I didn't latch at all, only pump every missed feed cuz I am trying to let my body get used to the pump.

2) I replaced all working hr feeds with bottles, night time I latch. But PD said if bb is very strong-willed, then have to try to feed her bottles even at night.

3) Gave her EBM everyday but weekend I reduced the frequency of bottles due to inconvenience and coming Monday she screamed murder at the sight of bottles again. Maybe it is good to continue during the weekends too.

4) Yup I pump every 2-3h or whenever possible. Bb will scream and cry a lot, so all i did was to carry and comfort her the whole day. Tried to make her sleep so we can dream feed. So poor baby din get to slp well at all during bottle war.

5) I used playtex bottles when she finally drank but she seems to like the small pigeon bottles with red/blue caps better. We used latex teats for pigeon.



Good luck starfruit! Hope ur bb will take bottles soon! Hope mine wun suddenly chu pattern n reject bottles again too..

 
Mummies, my bb is having cough with phlegm since yesterday, but she has been coughing for the past 2 weeks and has been on cough mecidine since. I'm afraid that she is down w bronchitis cuz her jiejie is down with it.. Anything that we can do? We have seen 2 doctors but still haven recover.. Sigh

 
Thks sylvia, maybe i go try the pigeon bottles. The problem is that she has been using her tommee tippee bottles from week 3 to 8 with no problem. So i also confused if i should change a bottle. Wat teat size u using? Size 2

I tried to dream feed, it does not work for me cos she dun drink n i suspect she is not hungry so wont take the bottle.

When are u going back to work?

 
nic, agreed with you... even my hb's very concern with J's self esteem too..



v, i'm also wonder if it's the membrane.. brought to mums & babes if they are able to figure out what's wrong but they can't tell too.. i think most of the time i pull it out to wash... i've compare both membrane but can't really see if there's a tear...

 
LittleFly - Hope you get well soon.



I not sure about my maid yet, she is supposed to have experience in looking after bb.. But from observation for past 1 week, she looks scared and worried. I did explained to her that my girl is not well and she will fuss.



But each tome she started crying, she do not know what to do..My mum told me she caught her covering up my girl's moouth when she was crying. I trust my mum of course but I did not see with my own eyes so I am still monitoring.



Apparently, she will prefers to do housework than looking after my girl. ANyway it has been a week will continue to monitor to see if she able to cope with my girl, if not then have to let her go.

 
dolly: I agree w the mommies here tt J hvg handling too many changes at one time. Mayb u tell ur mom tt it's gd idea to potty train but to start maybe 2-3 mths later as she juz quit her pacy? 1 step at a time



Deon: sounds dangerous to cover mouth when crying leh. Can try asking ur maid to tell u frankly how she feel abt taking care of bb? If she say not used to it then mayb u share e load w her for time being till more comfortable.

This was wat I did. Altho my maid w us since #1 was 3 mths. But after 4 yes I can't expect her to take to a newborn immediately too. So I was hands on w bb fr beginning then let go bit by bit. Observe how she handles bb too. Now I can leave bb at home alone w her liao

 
Hi Ash,



Thanks for sharing your experience.



For weekdays, my mum is around so she will show her what to do. FOr weekends I will be around to help her as well.



But the problem is that she tends to rely on my mum and refuse to hands on. Except weekends when I am around then she will do. She cannot burp my girl so we will show her how to do it. Then we told her she must try after a few times, she will be able to do it.



My priority is to get someone to help my mum with bb at night as she still wakes up for her night feeds. She got reflux so we cutting down her quantity of milk but more frequent feeds. She will wakes up every 2 to 2.5 hours.



I understand it is very tiring but we don't leave her to do it on her own. We actually keep our room's door open so that we can help her once bb cries. But she will close the door of her room. Usually I will leave it close if my mum is here in the weekdays as I am assured that someone is taking care of my girl. But not on weekends when my mum is not ard..



I feel they take advantage when we are too nice.

 
Deon: thanks. I am better after seeing doc today.



Many maids bio- data are not reliable. Mine lied about her age. I don't allow my maid to close the door entirely as Bb shares room with her n I told her i will pop in n out during night to feed Bb. I didn't let my maid handle Bb until recently. At first my maid was so scared of handling Bb but now she developed a fondness for him n her confidence grow in caring for him. You may want to observe n guide her for a while if refusing to hands on is due to lack of confidence, fear of baby or just laziness. Tell her upfront what she can or not do. Dont assume they got common sense. Covering Bb mouth is a strict no-no. My maid use tap cold water to wipe my elder boy at night n got a tongue lashing from me. She uses water heater for her own shower yet use cold water on my boy.



Dolly: every child develops differently with her own milestone. I agree w mummies to wait until your gal is ready. My boy is 4 but still wear diapers for night. My mil can say what she wants but I tell her he is just not ready.

 
Dolly, further to my last post, If the valve isn't snapped into place properly it will loose suction. N also if tbe mebrane piece is warped u may loose suction too. How have u been washing ur parts? U wanna replace new spareparts to try again suspect may be wrar & tear too.

 
Starfruit, I don't have a spare set of the part.. I've double confirm that the assemblyis tight lor... Ya I'll always washed it after pump.. You mean the parts don't need to wash? So do I need to go medela svc centre anot?

 
Dolly the membrane tear might be at the stub area coz u pull it out... U try removing the whole thing from the tube if the tube has suction than nothing wrong with the machine but the parts le... I never steam my membrane only use hot water to scald it before use and the pigeon cleanser to wash after use.. Coz the membrane will spoil too...

 
V, I've tried the tubing le.. There's suction in both ends, so confirm it's the membrane & the cover le.. So what should I change? I don't wish to travel all the way to Toh guan just to change the parts & look so silly!

 
Dolly: cld there b a tear in the soft shield? Mine had a tear. I didn't know n wonder how come no suction. I took out e parts to reassemble too n still no suction. Then I realize problem is the shield

 
Deon: if she is not auto, then got to tell her specifically wat to do. Like tell her it's time to bathe bb. Then stand ard to watch how she do it on point out on e spot if anything not rite. Since she wake up at nite to attend to bb, do u let her nap in e day?

 
deon: agree with Ash that covering of mouth is dangerous leh.. if finances permit, do install a secret camera.. although she mention she has experience, but words are cheap. we cant fully trust them..



and since she is here only a week, do not let her handle bb yet. monitor her behavouir first? than slowly release bit by bit.. in fact, i only allow my maid to carry my bb after she is 6 weeks old like that.. but ur bb is a tad more fussy, not many people can tahan..



slowly k?

 
Hi ladies....hw is everyone?



Tdy I had bottle war wif my gal so stressful...she is ok wif btl smtimes but smtimes just refuse [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]



Can i chk hw much milk u gals feeding ur bb n at wat interval? Mine's 11wks n still onli feeding 110ml or less ea feed at 3hrs interval...

 
Dolly: it could be any of the parts.. Like some mummy suggested to get 1 set and try one by one? I think soft shield cannot steam also u wanna dbl check? My soft shield went haywire haha..



Luann: my girl drinking ebm 100-130 depending on her each session for 3-4 hrly...



Any mummies here feel that ur ebm getting diluted ah??

 
Hi mummies, been so busy since started work! Hope all of u r fine out here. I hv probs w my mil too n kinda glad I'm nt alone n yes, it's tough to 'report' everythg to husband. I hv resorted to protecting my own child by telling my mil off directly for all the wrongs n dangerous stuff she did to baby. Eg carrying bb upright without supporting neck n lifting bb fr bed without supporting thd neck. Bb is only turning 3 mths nxt wk. Big sized 6.8kg but neck still nt stable. She simply does nt listen! Argghh!



By the way, any of u know where can I get fan covers for kids? Prevent fingers fr gg in? See, this is one preventive measure I need to tk early due to mil too. She loves to bring bb near fans simply cos bb loves to see thgs tat can move. N my bb starts to move his legs n fingers abt vigorously n yet she doesn't move away.

 
Mummies with freestyle, I've brought my pump & parts to mums & babes again. There's manager & Chinese staff (she's the one who sold the parts to me) went thru my parts & test. Confirmed that the membrane is not working. By rite the membrane should be flat but mine is curling up due to sterilizing heat from avent. Have spent $84.00 for the 2 parts coz membrane don't sold seperately.

 
bunny: My mil also carries my baby without supporting his neck. N his neck is totally unstable. There's once she carried my baby like that n baby's head dropped down then my husband say her then guess what she replied? She said she know but she continue carrying like that!



luann: My baby is taking 120ml n 3 hours interval.

 
Dolly actually i steralise all my parts including membrane. Maybe i should stop now.

Can also get the spare part kit from BP its cheaper.

 
Dolly: Nope I don't sterilise the membrane coz will spoil the silicone.. Buy from BP cheaper... Wash the membrane w pigeon soap and scald w hot water..

 
Jenny,



Same here!! When I told my mil nt to carry bb without supporting the neck, she said yeah she knows n always support cos worry later injure the neck. But when I'm working, I caught her nt supporting n lifting him high up n letting the head dropped n swayed left n right for a long time! She still mumbled 'or-bi' in hokkien- u deserve it. For the benefit of doubt, I tk it as a joke since she dotes on him too. BUT the last straw was when I cm Hm, she Did it in front of me again.



I asked her if she did it again on the same day. She replied me innocently y? Cannot ah? Wtf! I jus said to her on that same morning nt to do it n night cms she asked y, cannot ah n that she duno. Like shit!!!!

 
bunny: She got children before so she definitely knows, try to act innocent. My mil even worse. She's taking care of her granddaughter who is 4 mths bigger dan my baby. When my baby head dropped n sway, she even got the cheek to tell us that her granddaughter's head just got stable only. Then how possible isit for my boy's head to be stable in less than 3 mths. Even now my baby's head is much more stable I still support his head with eight fingers at the neck.

 


Hey all! It has been long since I last posted something? How all mummies doing? Coping well uh?



=D



Would like to ask any mummies' babies can flip or sit alrd?

Ard how many mths shld they be sitting without support from us?



My boy start to learn flipping & I quite confuse..I need to ask experience mummies here.. what u all do during tis 'flipping' stage? We can't possibly 'look after' them 24/7 right? So what we can do?

 
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