(2010/01) January 2010 mtb

lamb>thanks! some of the public schools in NY are quite good actually but I intend to send Ayden to an international school that's affiliated with my organisation. I've checked out the syllabus already and quite happy with it. Waitlisting should not be a problem since they give priority to staff's children. The organisation will help pay for tuition in mother tongue too so I definitely intend for him to continue to learn mandarin. Once he's in the system, we'll tahan if neccessary till he finishes school there. Don't want to pull him out at all and plunge him into a different education system.



jessie>Arwen is lucky to have such a loving mommy. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



I know if we go that I will miss SG too. There's so much convenience here and so many relatives and friends...



think no need to purposely dress in branded clothes bah. they outgrow the clothes so fast. :p



callalilly>wah, glad your exams went well. Hope can see photos of your trip. I miss Switzerland!



heard from xin that mattias op went well. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



smalldreams>hee, thanks. andie is preggers too! [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] she's due in jan, me in feb n lin in mar. wonder who will b the apr mommy :p

 


Jessie

you know, about being attached to our roots. I have friends who in their 20s left here to work overseas, some due to fiery angst and loafe of the local system, and some due to work opportunities. At first, they really enjoyed being away, some are single, some married and have kids. A friend of mine told me at first she purposely avoided Singaporeans and asians there, as she felt they had the same mentality which she wanted to move away from. But as the years go by, she found herself going back to her roots, and gradually had more and more asian friends, who share similar thoughts about life. 2 different friends told me what they miss most is being away from their father who was sick and passed away. Another married a local there, shared with us sometimes when she came upon a food e.g. salted fish fried rice, she would want so much to tuck in and enjoy with her family there, but they just don't understand what's the big deal. At that moment, her heart just sank as its something she feel so much like home, but can't share with her husband and kids.



Somehow, our history and roots never leave us, no matter where we are. Yes, one may indulge here and there in other places, but at the end of the day, there is always a connection to his roots. Being away makes it even stronger. Just like learning about history makes us more aware of why/how we are here and able to face the future with conviction.



Whether you are in your angtsy 20s or ambitious 30s or mellow 40s or contented 50s, everything is just a phase.

 
callalily, megan: thanks! now gotta think about sending emma to preschool next year. i honestly don't think my help and i can cope with a newborn + toddler.





on being a non-conformist, i feel that there are two types: one group are the ones who choose to go a different direction because they have a certain conviction, (like furby, lamb, jessie, cheerieheart, and many other mommies here) while the other just cannot conform to how the community wants you to be.



i belong to the latter, and honestly it was tough growing up. i wanted to blend in with my peers during my adolescent years but i just cannot accept their outlook of life. i understand their point, but i just cannot accept. and they don't seem to understand mine. i was pretty much left alone because i couldn't conform. that's why i'd tell people close to me: it good to have convictions, but don't trash someone else's just because it's different.



as i grew older, people around me find my thoughts interesting, but unapproachable as a person. it got better when i entered the workforce, but office politics dictates that everyone watch their backs. to belong to a community there are certain unwritten rules. when you constantly voice out ideas and notions different from everyone else, the community will shun you gradually, whether consciously or not. but there will be a handful of open-minded ones who don't judge. and i'm thankful for that.



as a parent, i pray that emma would belong to the first group, that's she's being different because of a belief.







when it comes to my roots, i'm not exactly tied down to the memories of life in Singapore. I'm tied to my country. It is this country that makes me proud to be a Singaporean, how we developed from a puny island that no one gives a hoot about to being where we are now. i hold my passport in my hand proudly everytime i travel, and not in a passport holder. whenever some ignoramus utter, "Singapore? is that part of China?", i always give them the evil eye.



i understand why Singapore(systems) and Singaporeans are molded to be so competitive, but i cannot accept. instead of fighting the education system here, i choose to go elsewhere. for me, it wasn't a particularly difficult decision, it was just that. logical and simple. because at the end of the day, we'll be back. whether our kids choose to return here or not, it's their decision. it's just part of being in a globalised world.

 
hihi...



Congrats Andie...

so nice to hear another mummy preggy... [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

all with 2nd one...



Jessie, I will still let Shayne play and smile to those pretentious ones... hahahah... so that he knows that there are all kinds of people...



Andie, I understand some people really dunno how to communicate with a toddler etc... but a smile to the toddler shouldnt be so bad right? well, not all love children too... and most find them noisy... [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] So we understand too... [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



Some pretend not to see when he trying to say hello in the lift and i will tell him not to disturb... hahahaha...



I will explain to him to saying that not everyone is friendly... you have done your part and you sure will meet people who appreciate you.



Been bringing Shayne to the pool everyday when the weather is fine... He makes lots of friends there... Sercurity Grandpa always walk up to him, say hi and tell him to learn to swim...

Shayne recognises him and smile, wave and fly kiss to him...





Furby, well said... Human always feel grass is greener on the other side... when the hots die down, everything is back to reality... It's good to have a chance to live elsewhere so that we will learn to be appreciative...



Lamb, yes things are really getting expensive here... standard of living really higher and more foreign talents... this will not change I guess...



Jessie, enjoy yourself in France huh... Try to relax and dun stress... shut your ears when things you do not want to hear are said... [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] I do that too...

 
Andie,



Wanted to drop you a post last nite but my body just decided to give way, i was just too tired! For some reason, since I got back to Singapore, if I'm not out with Nat in the afternoons, I'd be taking her noon nap with her. I told you gals I'm more relaxed in Singapore! Back in Shanghai, during her noon nap, I'd have a gazillion number of things to do it seems. Congratulations on your pregnancy! I am not courageous enough to consider a 2nd one this soon and truth be told, DH and I have not found a compelling reason for a 2nd child because we're not convinced at this point that having a 2nd child will act as a companion for Nat.



Not forgetting I still haven't recovered from the horrifying memories of taking care of a baby's first year. Don't get me wrong. Nat wasn't a difficult baby. But I hated the fact that I couldn't have a lot of free time. My mom noticed during this home trip that I've gained weight. Ever since Nat turned 1 and started walking, I find myself eating better, more relaxed about a lot of things.



I guess that's how the weight gain came about. I no longer get upset when DH goes on his trips and leaving me alone to parent Nat. Despite the fact that Nat needs me more to keep her company, i actually enjoy time spent with her coz' it seems to have taken a whole new meaning. And perhaps because of this, I am not ready to share time with her with another child yet. While I know that as we grow older, the possibilities of conception just doesn't get easier, but we're just not ready. You know ... I liked the bit you wrote about how you were proud to be a Singaporean.



Singapore has indeed grown a lot to be where it is today. And sometimes I wonder, was it due to its success that she's forgotten to slow down. Is it really necessary to be top in everything? So much so that it drives Singaporeans away to other countries. And that is sad because at the end of the day, all of the achievements she has, the 'original' singaporeans are not there to celebrate. Then what is the point of it all?



But I've always told DH this ... that no matter how long we've been away, Singapore will always be our home, will be Nat's home.

 
Congrats Andie!



I am still stuck at wk, so sian decided to drop by and say hi.



Not sure if terrible Twos starts now...We are having prob with A. He seems to be testing authority and limits nowadays. If we dun give in, he will scream n shout n roll on floor! Or throw things!!! I n hb fight over discipline issues for A. Cos if I scold him, he will start to shout n cry even louder. My hb left him alone in the rm to cry, he cried nonstop for 30 mins. I told him maybe A is the type where we need to use soft approach, hb said A is liddat cos all the gramps spoil him rotten.... I am really very scared of wat is to come, I dunno hw!

 
lil lamb, I know wat you mean abt the phobia of taking care of baby's 1st yr...just to share my experience wt you...after I had my 1st one I told my hb, i dun want to hv another one...my hb is a pvt tutor, so most of the time esp evening and weekends he is not at home...everytime I handle everything on my own tat time I felt like it's a torture...in fact right after confinement I cried when baby cried...i told hb I dun mind preggie, I'm not afraid of Csect or confinement...wat I dislike most is taking care all by myself...later when I had a helper, everything change...esp I start to find that I have more help and even can find sometime called "ME" time....when I had my no.2, everything is so diff...I thank God for all the good helpers He sent to me!!!! I nvr regret having no.2 and am having fun with them!!!another thing is that 1st yr phase passed vy fast, so it wasn't tat bad actually!!!

 
jessie, andie & febie,



For some reason, I have mentioned before also is that Singaporeans in general are not very forward with kids. The chinese on the other hand, are too extreme!!! They'll come forward and touch your kids, some even attempt to kiss them!!! It's freaky. Personally, I'd rather they not give my kid attention. Plus Nat also rather one kind lah.



She's not that sort who'll openly wave or smile at others. She'll stare for a while and then decide if she wants to be friendly. Plus recently, she started to understand the concept of being shy towards strangers. She'll just keep hiding behind my back or burying her face in my laps if I'm seated down. So weird huh? And I actually feel bad for those people who tried to play with her or went oh so cute with her because she doesn't quite reciprocate.

 
i went to a trial lesson for my LO enrolment to a newly opened CCC, DH took leave n brought us there n heard another CCC's teachers shouting at the toddlers during his 'inspection' ard the environment..my god..told DH if he hears again, feel free to scold the teachers off, do the parents a favour..heehee...

The new CCC is so nice, i love it, the place is new, non air-con, at the hilltop though the food is not up to my expectations which is a slice of Meiji biscuit n lunch is sausage spaghetti. Contemplating whether environment or learning is a priority..A place with lotsa outdoor or a indoor air-con 'box' with lotsa teachings..

 
Mommies,



Ask you all ... what happened to Shyna's nachos in BP huh? I have a craving for his meltz leh. Anyone has any idea how to order from him?

 
jessie,



Yeah, it's so nice to see the thread revived. For a long while, I haven't come back in coz' there were hardly any posts. Hopefully we can keep these going till our LOs turn adults! Hhahahaha. I find that the Jan10 moms in this thread are an intelligent and interesting lot. I feel very entertained reading their posts and do gain some insights into motherhood as well.



Not forgetting mommies here are also very supportive when we have doubts or questions about parenting and simply lend a listening ear and offer advice to the troubled mommies. That's why I still feel a form of attachment to this thread. Being a first time mom, it really can get pretty daunting at times. And being in Shanghai, it's also good to get a sense of what mommies in Singapore are doing for their LOs so that we can keep up.



It's just so nice to be able to bring Arwen to the forest. I am envious.



Did you all have any encounter with any forest animals there? I can just imagine arwen playing with the pebbles and squealing in excitement.



As for schooling for Arwen, if your plans are eventually to settle down in France and not be back in Singapore to raise her, then I guess you can safely let her study there. She's after all of french nationality. Even should there be a day you guys choose to come over to Singapore, she can still study in a french/international school here. But as furby pointed out, that no matter where we are, we will never forget our roots.



And i think this will apply to Arwen too eventually, that she's after all half a Singaporean and I believe that when she grows older, she'll be curious of this half nationality of hers and would want to know more about this country. Just like for Nat, I would believe one day, she'd also come to question why her nationality is Singaporean when her life is in China.

 
lsntyl,



Glad to hear that you've thought it through for Ayden's education. And I am not surprised you'd have planned it all out for him since you guys are gonna be making a lot of sacrifices being there. When you meant you'll tahan when necessary to keep him in the education system, do you mean that no matter what changes in the organisation, you'll still strive to stay in NY/US? My advice to you is to work out something with the company as a back-up plan before you head over. Either that or when you come back, you might have to consider sending Ayden to an American school here. Perhaps now, for 2 kids since number 2 will potentially be there.



And I'm sure in time to come, you'll have planned it all out for number 2 to settle in US. I guess everything has just come so suddenly, with hormonal changes in your body, it does take time to consider what are the next few steps to take. I just wanna wish you all the best! And even with time difference, we hope to continue seeing you in this thread, keeping us posted of your 2 kiddos progress!

 
TYL:

I dunno if I will ever get down to arranging my photos for the Swiss trip. Right now, I am busy trying to get a full time helper cuz Aly's hyper activeness, tantrums and discipline issues are severely testing my patience!!! On a more positive note, she is also a lot more fun to be with now and I simply love her smiles and endearing behavior. How's yr pregnancy and decision to move to US coming along?



Firipy:

Tell me abt tantrums...I have a lot of issues with that now. Aly is like wat u have described of Ayden, perhaps of a more severe degree even!!! Makes me wonder if it's due to poor parenting. But after having done some homework, I kinda take heart in knowing that it's just a phase that they go through and will outgrow. Maybe the more experienced mummies in this thread can comment or share their experiences and tips. In the meantime, I try to build up my tolerance threshold, attempt to pre-empt a tantrum and not let it escalate to a full blown one and when it does happen, ignore and walk away and pray that the phase will pass quickly!!!



Andie:

Hope you have shortlisted or found a preschool for Emma!

 
Just came back last evening, all of us having jet lag! Arwen was up from 11 pm to 2am. I was too tired to play with her, so we watch Taxi 4 together and had cereals.



Today, freaking zonk siah. Hate to take flight, really really hate to fly!



Firipy: Arwen had been developing tantrums past few months too. But I curb it fast, basically I left her to cry as long as she wants if her demands are unreasonable. I will leave the room and let her have her tantrum. I will not shout or scold her, just firmly say NO and walk away. This is how I deal with it. Nowadays better, she kind of know I won't bother if she throw her tantrums, she hardly do it but with DH and Ayi , she still does ;p



Still I feel, the best is reduce any chances, scenerios where she will get to throw a tantrum. I always make sure her world is "staged" , sounds scary eh but that means my house, almost 90 % all the things she can touch and play with. This way I reduce a lot of stress on my part and hardly need for me to say No. But of cos that means, my place is like a childcare centre and well.. abit sparse on pretty decorations! Outside, I will only let her off her strollers to run about if the surrounding is safe so I do not have to keep shouting "Don't go there" , "Dirty!!!Don't eat!" Etc.





Don't worry too much, I mean er, grandparents sure spoil their grand kids rotten one what, it would be sad if it is the opposite right? No point saying the grandparents are at fault cos I think seriously a lot of kids throw tantrums one, I feel best is to remain calm and don't show any frustrations cos seems to me, it just add oil to fire!





Lamb: We saw mostly horse. No deers or squirrel but it was fun to see her being amazed at a ladybug. Yes, the forest behind my MIL place is wonderful. The air is so fresh and it is really nice just being inside under the trees. Abit surreal for a SG like me!



Yes, I am relived too that I will not be bother with preschool search here anymore. I really rather bring her out more and experience real life . But I do know school is essential as it gives some sense of social structure for them so I will still go for the French classes .



Megan : Yes, I think so too, baby's first year, I felt I completely disappear from the surface of the earth. I am 100% not myself. I was fat, my clothes huge and boring , I was tired most of the time, I was not me, I was not out there shopping, having a life, I was not partying, I was dull, I was stress all the time. For me it was like someone else took over my body. But after the first year, as of now, I regain my figure, I go out more, I am more confident of my parenting skills etc , life is slowly coming together for me again. It is good



Funny thing is... I was not sad or scare during that first year of being a mother, it was good not to care about myself, my feelings, my thoughts, what to wear, what color to do my hair etc... it was good for a while, it isn't about me anymore.. I guess I was so sick of myself before Arwen. I mean it is always about me me me, but it was liberating to let it be her her her. But of cos , after that one year, I realize it is important for me to catch up with the world or I will be trap in her world! LOL

 
I think it is my imagination or just pure coincidence but ..is Arwen trying to distract us from her farts?



For the maybe fifth time now, I noticed when she is beside me, she will suddenly be perky and interested in something around her, like for example, today, suddenly she squat, point to her very very old ball and exclaimed loudly, like as if it the first time she sees it , I then bent down to see what is the fuss about , then she farted ..loudly..and walked way. I mean... hmm..



The other time was an old flower pot, she bent and point to something in the pot, I go over and see and she farts.....and walk away nonchalantly..



Trying to video the next possible episode to let DH see what he thinks but it is plausible they at this age, already are mastering the skills of hiding their farts?

 
mamaD>thanks. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] I think I would go for the environment... but also must see how the teachers are and how different the teaching is



Lamb>you are staying in China for good? Not coming back to SG eventually?



thanks v much for your well wishes wor. I meant if the section I'm in is not good, then I'll just tahan and either request to transfer to another duty station or section. I would love to be able to transfer one day to the Geneva duty station as that would give Ayden another whole new perspective in how people live. Of course too much transfers can also be jarring and disruptive to them too so will keep it to a minimum. Concerned about how hubby will get a job in Geneva though so immediate plan is to stay in US first. We'll see how things go. Education wise, there's also an international school that's affiliated to the organisation there so not that worried



callalily>haiz, the HR also v slow. Will see how lah. pregnancy so far ok. I'm lucky. No MS his time too



jessie>hee, or is she trying to get you to bend down so you can smell her farts better? :p



firipy>when ayden throws tantrums, i normally hold him tight n tell him no tantrums. then distract him with something else. seems to work most of the time

 
furby,



I really liked what you posted there. When I first went to China, my first instinct was to look around for fellow Singaporeans to connect with. When I was in Beijing, I was blessed enough to have known some Singaporeans living there prior to moving over. So we hung out together, got to know the city better. Then I moved on to Shanghai. I had to start from scratch.



I wasn't working, out there exploring on my own and after a while, i really wanted to belong to a community. And where best to look for a like-minded community? I made some singaporean and malaysian friends. And through them, I got to know Shanghai better. Be it in terms of where to makan, the culture, how to handle the locals. DH, on the other end, just wanted to stay away from Singaporeans.



He just doesn't wanna sink in back to the all familiar terrain again. So whenever we had social gatherings with fellow Singaporeans, he was never keen to attend. After we had Nat, I really was very blessed to have the support of fellow Singaporean/Malaysian mommies. They dished out advice on what to bring over from Singapore which was critical, when Nat was unwell, Jessie and some of my mommy friends shared with me what to do and also see which paed. Now that Nat is old enough to attend classes, I have friends recommending me which classes to send to, parenting tips, we go to each others place for playdates, meet up for luncheons, have nites out together. I do have some non-Singaporean/Malaysian friends but I do feel more belonged being with fellow singaporeans/malaysians.



I guess different people have different agendas for staying away from home. And my agenda wasn't to stay away from Singaporeans. In fact, the reason why Shanghai is beginning to feel more like home to me is because of the friends I've made. DH is also beginning to appreciate all these support we have from friends. But his preference is still to hang out with his HK/Taiwanese friends. He just feels that when Singaporean men gather together, they either talk about makan/cars/golf/investments.



Out of which, he is not interested in either. I told him, how often do you find middle aged men still interested in gaming?! But it doesn't matter to him that he has little friends in Shanghai. I sometimes do think that shud one day, my kakees leave one by one, I wun feel the desire to stay on in shanghai also. :p

 
jesie/sp_calalili/tyl: I also think its a phase they will pass thru , but my hb tinks otherwise...I tink cos his frens who have kids are all men and they hardly spend time with the kids. They usually dun really go n study the mentality of kids either. Its like I left him there to cry oso cannot, hit his legs oso cannot...distract him his dad says I m giving in...Wah I am so frustrated abt the whole thing.

 
Hi all,



Today brought LO to the clinic for her jab. She took 2 final jabs (5-1 and pneumo) and as she has finished her necessary jabs, she got a cert showing the summary. It's the first time I got a cert as in the past I went all over the place at different clinics and mess up the schedule, even forgetting some jabs. Then during school check up got problem with the record. This one I bring to polyclinic reason is they have strength in appt (SMS) and record keeping which is helpful for me, not so much for convenience or price ( which I don't check).



Am sure most mummies would have finished the jabs by now?

 
furby, A is going for his last jab next week. I tink its the last of everything...I can't keep track too, my mum brings him for his jabs ever since I started working.



Mummies who have both boys n girls kiddos, ppl kept telling me boys always like to play n nt pay attention, I hope its true! My boy is so full of energy!!! I need salonpas.....



I realise I must really talk nicely to my boy, he is so very stubborn, beyond me n everyone else. He hit my dad ytd cos his toy ran out of batt, dad brought him downstairs to buy batt. But the batt compartment needs screwdriver to open. He insist my dad just pry open there n then at the instance! My dad, told him to wait, all patient n nice n he jus hit my dad in frustration. Threw tantrums n cry! My dad was so shocked, just the 2 of them... Distract him by telling him the cat is looking at them etc. My dad was sharing abt this incident in evening when I n hb was back fr our dinner date. I was very fierce, asked A y did he hit grandpa, he started crying n kicking the next second! *slaps forehead* Buay tahan this wayang baby, so grandpa came n pick him up fr me. Ask him say sorry n sayang mummy, he cried louder....Grandpa pacified him n both were playing his toys happily for quite a while n later my mum nag n said so late A needs to bathe, so dad went n put A's bath water, so I made use of the chance to talk to the lil fella. I told him wat he did was wrong, grandpa will be in pain if he hit him. Nw grandpa is upset, crying in toilet cos he made grandpa hurt n in pain. A got so scared, face turn pale, almost like crying, ran to the toilet, shouted for my dad n hugged him! Full of pattern nowadays, I must use soft approach, being all stern n loud is not working

 
firipy>aiyoh, ayden09 really v wayang. Think he is pushing the limits cos he knows he can normally get his way? can understand how difficult it is for you to try and discipline him if the rest of the family don't stand on your side.



furby>ayden is due for his last 5 in 1. But haven't gone yet cos first he was unwell then now I'm sick. Want to make sure everyone is well b4 we bring him for his jab

 
firipy

for kids even very young, I like to explain things to them, at that age, they probably do not have the inborn rebel in them, it's only thru peer they learn later. Like why they can't have this or that, normally, kids even very young can get it from the tone. Nowadays, my LO also try to manja things her way, I can tell because she fake cry or see from corner of her eyes if anyone notice and give attention etc. They are learning communication thru emotional control.



I have seen some parents at the shop just shouting 'no, no alex no. Daddy say no. No, come here. No means no. YOu do somemore, I beat you ah....." and drag the kid away. I mean anybody who hears that will feel pek chek also, or some may rebel for sake of it. As parents, should avoid such confrontation.



another thing, always be consistent, but this is easier said than done, as consistency can cut across caregiver, parents, gramps, situation and standards. Who is for discipline, who is for spoiling, soft or hard method first? As long as you set out something among all beforehand, will be able to deal with it.

 
Good morning mummies.



Seems like quite some discussions took place. It's nice to see this thread being active again.



I think some mummies might recall that I opted to let nature takes it's course since I can't decide whether i want another child. much to my surprise, i have tested positive on the HPT. i wasn't expecting this and wasn't sure what i was hoping to see while waiting for the result. in the last few days, my emotions went from disbelieve to sadness and to fear. i was sad at the thought of YX possibly receiving lesser attention from me and when I think about having to care for an active toddler and an infant, i was suddenly overcome with fear. and then i worried about what my employers would think.



now that i had the time to sort out my thoughts and the fact that DH seemed quite excited about the news (much to my surprise), i pushed all negative thoughts out of my mind and tell myself that this is a piece of good news and that i should be happy. our family and our friends will be very happy for us.



this time around seems a little different though. before my menses was due, i was already experiencing symptons. i have mild nauseous early in the morning and hunger pangs every couple of hours. the only similarlity was the craving for soupy food. all these added together was enough to make me suspicious. any by co-incidence, YX was extra sticky and extra fussy lately.





i have yet to see the gynea but hope that i can do a VBAC, if it is safe to do so.

 
andie> congrats! is Emma still a regular at Peekaboo?



firipy> YX is also behaving like a terrible twos. i find that if we take the time to explain to him, most of the time, he would back down. but usually in the morning, when we are rushing off for work, it's quite difficult to be ever so patient with him. Other than that, we find that it also work to remove him from the situation or to distract him.



furby> YX is done with all his mandatory jabs. i also take him to different places and one of the clinic gave me paper certs instead of updating it into the system. So, the clinic that I last visited requested for all the certs so that they can help me to update it into the system. so nice of them..



sp_callalily> how is Aly doing? congrats for passing the exam. I know it can be tough as i was working and studying part-time most of my working life. what more you have an attention demanding toddler.



wow.. so you finally decided to go to Switzerland afterall. we will be heading to Melbourne in Oct and I hope that YX will sleep during the night flight there. I am one who can never sleep in a aeroplane.

 
cocomama>congrats! [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] I had a lot of mixed feelings when I confirmed #2 too. But tell myself it'll all out somehow. I'm actually terrified at the thought of having to look after Ayden and a NB in a foreign country with no family support at all. But I know hubby will do his best to help and somehow we will overcome it. If your employers are good, I'm sure they'll support the pregnancy. I was so relieved when I finally told my future boss that I am pregnant and she was v supportive. Now, if only HR will start moving!



Personally, I think it is important to still try and spend time with YX, esp when #2 is out. At this stage, YX and Ayden can remember things so I think we need to try to reassure them that mommy n daddy still love and care for them and that the new baby will not mean they will have less attention. But of course sometimes we will be distracted with #2, so hopefully, we can teach our #1s to love and care for #2 too. After all, this is a new playmate for them. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
congrats cocomama...am so happy that so many mummies here expecting...for those who are trying..all the best!!!



My maid has been singing praises abt HW...says tat she is a sensible child and easy to take care...when maid hv to do housework, she will always try to help, eg when maid hang clothes she will pass the clothes one by one to my maid to hang, when maid fold clothes she will help to remove the hangers and when maid make the bed she will pass the pillow one by one to my maid...am happy that she is such a sensible child but also she has her cranky time too...overall am blessed. so to mummies who are expecting, some kids a easier to manage...so dun think too much, just enjoy your pregnancy and take good care of urself!!!

 
congrats to cocomama! and the other mummies, Lin, TYL and Andie



With all the hormone change and how it will affect the family and plans, it is normal to feel worry, stress, joy all at the same time. But at the end of the day, it is more joy all round.



Megan,



HW is so sweet. Don't know is it a girl thing to be more sensible? My girl also 'help' around the house, and very fussy abt tidiness. Anything not in place, she will whine. Like house keeper.

 
furby>thanks. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



megan>HW so guai lor. Ya, I'm tell myself not to worry too much. Worry oso like tat. Don't worry oso like tat. Now that have #2 le, just try n enjoy the process and trust things will work out somehow. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Wa, another baby, congrats Cocomama! [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



YL, that's great, happy for you! At least no need to worry that your new boss will make things difficult for you. See, your no. 2 brings you luck. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
pauline>hope so. donno why 2 babies, both v scared n worried when have them. then change jobs half-way in the pregnancy. Now I just need to wait for their HR lor. They're v slow. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 
YL, I think both your babies bring you career luck lor since both times you are moving to a better job with more prospects/pay. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
pauline>hee, tat would b v nice. but i got 2nd job b4 i got preggers with #2 leh. :p just tat their HR super slow delay till so long lor. My interview was in March. Until now, still not settled.



hope #2 bring hubby career luck. tat's more impt now. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
lsntyl, megan, furby, pauline> thanks lots!!



lsntyl> yeah.. i'm slowly coming to terms with it. i think your situation more taxing since you've got a big move coming up. when do they expect you to report for work? have you got your driving license sorted out?



i know for certain that my employers are very eager for me to resume travelling. although i spelt out no travelling when being interviewed, i didn't mind the occasional travel before YX came along. they are currently trying to secure a project in Hong Kong and is eager for me to manage that project since I am the only experienced team member who can speak Canto.



megan> HW is so sweet. YX also tries to help out by sweeping the floor, etc.. but usually creates more work for me. i don't really mind though since it keeps him occupied... ha..ha..



furby> i think hormonal change is really the right word. don't remember having such roller coaster emotions for a long time. in fact, not even when i was expecting YX.



pauline> i recall you had a very good CL for your last confinement. is she local? could you pass me her contact? TIA.

 
cocomama>ohh, a stint in HK would be interesting but would be more difficult when you're pregnant I guess. Whatever happens, we're all strong mommies. I'm sure we'll be able to handle whatever comes along, esp with the help of our hubbies.



I expect work to start in late Sept.



BTW, if Pauline doesn't work out, I can pass you the contact of a CL that my other friend used for her #1 and #2. She's quite experienced and from the photos I saw, a v good cook. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] If I rem correctly, Pauline's CL is a Malaysian.

 
YL, hehe, but at least baby no. 2 didn't jeopardise your career prospects. ;)



cocomama, tried to post yesterday but couldn't. :p I've Pmed you my CL's contact. Yup, as YL mentioned, she is Malaysian. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
CocoMama:

Congrats!!!! I think u r very brave to contemplate VBAC!!! Think if I were to try for #2, will definitely opt for elective CS! Just have to 'check in' in the morning after a gd night's res the night before, operation over in 1 hr and then stay in the hosp the next 5 days and living the life of a queen! But that's me, dun me affect yr decision for a VBAC if u have decided ti go for it k?



Dun worry too much abt the upcoming Melbourne trip. YX will definitely enjoy himself there. Dun have too high expectations of YX sleeping throughout the flight...think if he can manage 3 to 4 hrs of uninterrupted sleep, gd enuf. Plan a light day after u touch down so that everyone can rest. If u r planning a self drive holiday there, even better. YX will make up for lost sleep during the drive. Do u intend to get a seat for YX on the plane? We din but was lucky to have the whole row of 4 seats to ourselves! Certainly helped a great deal for the long haul flight. We were also very lucky to have passengers to help us entertain Aly so we could rest!!!



U know, I was complaining abt Aly's tantrums right? Guess wat, she has decided to be a really gd girl the past week and even now! After much trial and error, I realized soft approach works the best for her. Think her ability to comprehend is also getting better, hence it's easier to reason with her and prevent meltdowns.



Have you started YX on regular classes or still looking around?

 
lsntyl> i am not so keen about travelling for work. because we charges our client for our time, they always make the most of our time there. i remember a couple of times, we ran from the immigration all the way to the gate just to catch the flight.



but the main reason is because YX is extremely attached to me during bedtime. he doesn't even want his daddy.



if possible, could you pass me the contact of the CL that you mentioned? i am still considering whether to get just a day-time CL due to space constraint.



pauline> got your PM. thank for the contact. when everything is more settled, i will contact her.



sp_callalily> thanks. you know, when i had a c-sec with YX, i felt like i got cheated or something. if the situation looks optimistic for a VBAC, i will give it a go. but then again, c-sec would be so much easier to plan the logistics, work and the care for YX. i guess i can only tell for certain when the time comes.



We won't be getting a seat for YX on the plane. keeping fingers crossed that the flight is not too packed. luckily we will have SIL and MIL to help out if necessary. we will be doing a self drive holiday there. wondering whether we should take the opportunity to go Tasmania as well.



Glad that you found a workable approach for Aly. I realized the same for YX too. My babysitter was telling me that whenever she explains things to him nicely, he would follow her instructions.



I have not started him on any regular classes. For now, it's a lot of free play and helping me around the house, like putting treats into my dog's treat ball.

 
btw, does any mummies know of a gynae who delivers at Parkway East? preferably female. my regular gynae is no longer handling delivery. TIA.

 
hi all, long time no come in coz totally swamped w work til sick liaoz. n mon gg to korea for a working trip. mattias and hb and my family will b gg over for 2 days to join me aft my work. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



nice to see the thread so active. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



congrats to all the expecting mummies!!! my plan is also to get preg ard now... hee hee... but like not so nice to b preg aft they send me on overseas trip. see how ba.



SP> mattias went for op a mth ago and is fully recovered. really can see the difference. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



nd to go bk to work liaoz. hope to b able to come in more often. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



take care everyone!

 
CocoMama:

If u r still looking for female gynae, I highly recommend Dr Chee Jing Jye. since u will be doing self-drive, my advice is to plan the long drives during YX's longest daytime nap. For Aly, the longest stretch of drive was max 2.5hr without her getting fidgety and cranky...



Xin:

Glad to hear mattias is doing well after the operation. Enjoy yr biz cum holiday trip to korea.

 
Congrats Cocomama,



I am very keen on #2 too but I am at a very complex situation, job unstable...hb promoted with more responsibilities and less time...I dunno if I shld let all these stop us from planning for 32. I dun want the kids age gap too be too huge....I really dunno how tho tentatively I am not being affected by the retrenchment. Was tinking if this work thing is taking a toil on the whole family when preggy maybe I could stop wk for awhile again n find job after bb is borned n settled down etc. We just have to tighten our belts for a period



xin,



enjoy ur trip n am happy to hear that Matt is doing well.

 
Happy National Day mommies !!



lin> thanks for the recommendation.



xin> all the best!! by the time you conceive and deliver, it would be one year after the trip. glad that mattias is showing good improvement after the op.



sp_callalily> thanks for the recommendation. i saw her profile in PEH's website. she looks like a 'celebrity' doctor. were you under her care before?



nowadays, YX can nap no more than an hour in a car. as soon as the car slows down or stops, he would wake up. i think we will just take it slow and easy. it's a vacation after all.



firipy> thanks. i also can't make up my mind on #2 and decided to just let it be natural. actually, i think 3 years would be a better age gap (after all the terrible 2s and horrible 3s have passed). sometimes can't think and plan too much or too far ahead as things/situations don't stay the same all the time. whatever your decision is, as long as you won't look back and regret, it is a good decision.

 


Cocomama, Andie - Congrats!! Seems like the mummies who are preggie tend to live towards the east side? [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



Cocomama - Enjoy your melbourne trip before #2 pops. Make it a good relaxation time for you too. Anyway, why did you say when you had a c-sec with YX, you felt like you got cheated or something?



Xin - Good to know that Matt is doing well after the ops. Its all worth the while. Erh... get pregnant after the trip so they will not send you on anymore of such trip, unless you are keen? Hee (evil thoughts)!



Megan - So nice to know that HW helps out in the house. Maybe I should train Bryan up in some way too, other than messing up the whole house for me everyday.

 
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