wah! Phoebe very guai! i'd like her to be my daughter! she super sensible leh! hahaha.
but to me, for character building, part of it is inborn, part of it is family shape up de. discipling is a never ending topic.
my boy since born, his temper is horrible! when he cries, he wails loudly. now, whenever frustration, he pull his hair and hits the bed. when excited, he'll hit his tummy. this kind huh, next time sure hot temper type!
i've read articles that some babies are super patience de. some hor, super guai. since birth can cry softly, wait patiently for milk, etc etc.
so i conclude babies are born with some character de. all are babies but why some easy to take care some very hard? its like there's already a type of foundation inside. so next step is growing up stage. this is where the environment plays the main part to shape their character fully.
i've seen how my 3 younger sis growing up. all of them different pattern and so my mum uses different kind of approach to teach us. what works for no1 might not works for no 2,3,4...
i've read articles, tv programms and interview with children psychologist. which each of them has their own views, its always good to listen to more opinions.
the best bet is to see it with an open mind. typically we'll shape our child to be like ourselves, which we sometimes neglect who they really wanna be/are. my main concern is ethics and manners.
if really wanna use rod, a psychologist quotes a situation; a child touching the socket. first seen hit once. second time, hit twice. third time hit thrice. this will let the child knows that if they touch again, it'll mean more caning. guess it only works for those not-so-stubborn child.
im still learning everyday. so far, my conclusion is dun use pain too often because kids will gradually immune to it. one of my cousin, 7yo, was so immune to it that he literally ask my aunt to cane him lo. he not scare liao.
oh, dun quarrel in front of kids. this is a definite no no.
