(2009/08) August 2009 MTBs

thanks for the advises...
hmmm... so prolly in april or may.. i shld start searching for one le.

sorry..paiseh..ask u all arh...u all prefer married or single de maids? haiyo.. nowadays..got so many all these maids prob..abit scared arh.

also.. i still duno day time whether wana bring the maid & bbs to my parent's or in-law's plc.. 2 little ones.. duno if she can handle boh. all rest (family members) working leh.

confinement lady..
i tink tonite i will ask my mummy.. if she will like take 1 mth unpaid or if she tink she can handle/help me during confinement instead of hiring a confinement lady.. cos $3k for a confinement lady.. den still hv maid.. abit no point to pay 2 person to help with such, some of the duties..like duplicate rite?

very vex!
 


Bobo
If the maid already has a valid passport, then the process very fast, can arrive in sin abt 10 days or so. If u choose a maid w/o a valid passport, then the process takes abt 4 to 6 weeks. The agent will tell u whether the maid got valid passport or not. But from my exp with maids ( hiring to look after my mum ) it is always better to get early cos if it doesn't work out, still got time to change.
 
fjn
mine's oso a filipino.. oso got existing passport.. but agency still say 6wks... how come urs fasteR? how long is it then? but filipinos got an attitude lor? what's with indonesians?
 
bobo, but the maids may lie also, so u wouldnt know if they are truly married/ single... so many already lie about their age..
 
Baby S: Ya I agree it might be a stretchmark. it's usually vertical. Usually when it is a fresh stretchmark, it starts off red, then will turn silvery over time and it's there to stay. If alot, will look like the watermelon, u imagine the light green water as ur body and the darker green stripes as the stretchmarks. I ever saw on a website a very bad case of stretchmarks. In any case, not to scare u or anyone here, this is only the beginning. It gets worse and it's the worst in the last few weeks just before you deliver. I remember the last month before I delivered, cos I already went on maternity leave, i could "study" my stomach more. Every day, i have new stretchmark coming out. I could hardly prevent it. I think a lot got to do with the elasticity of the skin. So for me, although I manage to lose all the weight from pregnancy, I ended up with stretchmarks, that are still silvery now and it's there to stay.
 
fatbobo
actually putting the kids in ur mum's place is a better idea right? i mean all daughters are closer to the mums..and would want their mums to be one of the main caregiveR? if ur mum did something u think is not suitable for ur kids, u can tell her off directly and she would understand.. but an in-law..it's harder at times leh?
 
Jul - your body oil is for normal use or especially for pregnant women to ward off stretch marks? i used Palmer's Cocoa Butter Formula - Massage Cream for Stretch Marks for my first pregnancy.. and now just started using for my second. amazingly, i dint have any stretch marks the last time. hope the same will apply this time for me too.
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ya.. i tink i might be going for filipinos too. i agree.. they like.. got some kind of attitudes? prolly cos they know they r smarter in some senses? n..i'm not too comfy letting the maids off on sun.. n let them hang out like those in lucky plaza (n where ever else)..

i heard some scary stories abt indo maids too leh.. they r often lazier.. n this happened to my cousin last time.. she had this indo maid.. normally dun hv much prob de.. den duno since when.. she felt something not very right with her.. then there was this time.. the maid wanted to send a letter hm.. n (duno why this time) my cousin actually opened the letter before sending it out for her. she was shocked to find some hair in the enveloped.. she quickly took the letter to her malay colleague n asked them to help interpret the letter abit. cos kind of different language right, but the colleague managed to make up something like.. the hairs belong to my cousin & family, apparently, the maid is sending the hairs back hm to cast some spells on them!!!!!
wah kaoz.. she jit tao send the maid home arh! scary!!!
 
fatbobo
hahaha my hb thinks filipino maids lesser black magic stuffs coz at least they r catholics.. some agencies do not have weekends off, even for filipinos maids. some agencies will have maids that request for additional money if u want them to work on their off days.
 
fatbobo:
I agree with smurfy. Easier to deal with your own mum than ILs. I am so glad my mum is here wiht me in Shanghai. My ILs actually volunteer to come for 3 months to take over, saying shd give my mum a break. I said no straightaway to my hubby. Of course, they din know I was pregnant (intend to tell them this coming week once I do my Oscar test). Anyways I will be going back to Singapore in mid July for delivery. But my 1st 3 mths I stay with my ILs, i remember the experience was bad. u know how small the flats are in Singapore. My MIL jump out of bed every time she hears bb cry and then knock on my bedroom door and even attempt to open the door. I tell my hubby I get more stressed up by her than the bb crying lor. That, she shd just try to leave it to me, if I cant handle, then I will go wake her up.
 
precisely smurfy.. i oso agree on that point.
as like.. i can juz talk direct to my mother.. watever i told her nw.. like..she will 'take my instructions'.. haha.. abit unfair to say such.. but im sure some of u know wat i mean..

my mummy abit blur blur.. but at least she know hw to take care of us.. not like my MIL..say she modern..i dun quite agree. like i duno hw to say.. both my in-laws like.. dun bother much abt wat's ok or not for pregnancies.. when i said i cant eat this or that.. they will like.. 'oh, this cant eat arh?'.. but then, my hb's their only son..(his younger sis juz went overseas to study agn).. so they like.. initially, they wanted us to stay in tog n all de.. (but luckily i managed to 'convience' my hb to stay in our new HDB first before renting if want).. they owas want us to go back for dinr.. n im afraid they will say now the mother so lonely at hm..why dun let they bbs go over to their hse.. (oh, my FIL travel alot de)!

sighz.. in a way.. i oso dun dare to tink so far ahead.. but then.. i cannot juz sit here.. n dun plan!
 
smurfy / fat bobo - my five cent' worth - these days, more worth it to get Filipinos cos their wages same as Indonesians. typically, Filipinos do not speak as bad English, comprehend things better, etc. of cos, cleverer may mean more creative. also, Filipinos are more proud people. But this kind of things, subjective.

i had 3 Indonesian maids before - all singles. one very good, the first one in fact, but she has to go back after one year (family issue). the next few to come gave more headaches than anything.

i am playing safe cos me staying as a nuclear unit. esp on days i dont bring my children to childcare, i want to know she is doing a proper job taking care of the children.
 
tinkabel.. haiyo, i will be stressed if i were u too.. baby cry, u stress cos someone will com barging into ur toom..
 
hmmm.. ya.. i oso tot of that like if get a filipino.. i dun mind giving her sunday off.. but..she has to spend with the family! bahahaha.. s like.. if she wana go church.. we go tog (my hb catholic..i used to attend mass with him de..) den after that.. we can all go shopping or watever... she dun need to do hse work lar.. except..sometimes still need to look after the small ones niah.. bahahhahahaha...
tink i really tink too much le. lalala~
 
bobo, I think whether married or single doesn't make it better... it really depends on the personality of the maids and whether they are the "wild" kind. Like my friend, her maid has no handphone and no off day, but one day she discovered the maid has got a boyfriend!! So shocking. Whereas my maid has handphone and off day, and so far still seems ok (but of course I warn her often enough if got trouble, I will buy her the 1st ticket home to Philippines).
 
fatbobo
i think u got a sticky problem that ur hb is the onli son and ur mil is most probably lonely, so the newborn best put at her place.. gotta wriggle a way out lor...

tinkabel
mY mil ONCE came into my room while i wwas breastfeeding my boy coz he was crying.. i was sooo angry and told her off.. cannot stand it! my breasts for her to see one arr?

maids
is always a risk that we have to take..
sad.gif
..we can always generalize but end of the day, is dependant on the one u had chosen.. and most of the time, is by luck lor, coz biodata is sooo differnt frm the actual person coming to u.
 
baby S: Ya, but of course to her and my hubby, they are just trying to help and prob think I can't handle cos I am a first time mummy then. Like my MIL also always tell me to feed Matt every time he cries. I mean I told her I just fed like 1-2 hrs ago, how can he be hungry again? Then in the end, no choice, hv to give in to giving bb pacifier. Then he stop crying, but it also proves my point that bb is NOT hungry. I got lots of such little stories to tell. I mean, it may look like small things that we do not agree with each other, but if happen many times, then the friction really wears off the relationship.

Fat bobo: Same as u lor. My ILs like always expect their sons to go back for dinner. Like my BIL and wife and kid (BTW kid go childcare) go back for dinner every day lor. I mean, I dun expect to be like that next time. I mean then I have to answer to his parents whether each day I am going home or going out, then go out, will ask me go where. My parents dun even do that to me.
 
fjm,
Ah .... she's the belle ... in the family too
happy.gif
She prob takes after my grandma and father side, who are fair and has nicer features. I look more like my mum, short, dark and er ... bah bah de
happy.gif


bobo,
Another thing u might wanna also take note that for maids is whether they like dogs or not? I've heard of fren's maids who abuse the dog when they r out at work ... the poor dog was simply scared of the maid. I heard filipino maids are more acceptable to dogs due to their religion, although there are also some indo maids who are ok with dogs as well.

jul,
I've been getting itchy at places like my buttocks, tummy & breasts ... wonder if i shld start my stretchmark cream already?
 
oh.. sorry.. perhaps when i mean married or single.. it's more of with kids or not.. prolly those with their own kids are better in handling ours? singles might not be as experienced? or not necessarily the case?

hahahhaa babys... it's a kia-su-employer day off! bahahaha.
 
hi all mummies, still remember me??
I'm now almost 13weeks, but hvnt went for any local check up or choose a gyne.
Any comments for raffles hospital.
 
my current maid is a filipino.. but she very high class type lor.. for that n her attitude, we are not able to extend her contract. though i have got to admit, in terms of childcare, she takes care of my son well... but really no big no small type.... last time when she first came over within the 2nd mth, tell us is her birthday, can she has spagetti??? we tabao food home, leave the big drumsticks for the eldery as a form of respect... she go take the big drumstick... CNy reunion dinner, ordered small quantity of scallops, she dared to take before my hb takes and hb had none... go malaysia attend funeral wake, she requested to stay at home and not help me out in the wake coz it's sooo darn hot.. arggh
 
yep pengsfur.. i already hv in mind.. a very important qtn... if the potential maid is ok with big agreesive dog. ahaha.

my in-law's previous maid.. an indo.. luckily she's ok with my big dog.. but i tink sometimes she got abit too friendly with him..my doggie like sometimes follow her ard so much! grrrrr~

sighz.. so sian today.. almost 12:30 le.. i still duno wat to eat! prolly cos this mrng i had nasi lemak..so not so hungry still. but ya lar... really duno wat to eat. sianz!!!
 
smurfy, i so agree with you on the point that its a risk we take as its impossible to tell from a piece of paper what the maid is like. What happened to your old maid?

bobo, my colleagues told me some maids with kids have not looked after their own kids (as may be taken care of by mother)... whereas some who are single have looked after niece or nephews... so when you interview the maid, you can ask about her hands on experience.
 
hmm.. pegsfur, you SHOULD start using the stretch mark cream asap!
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fatBobo, no right or wrong, this time around, the Filipino I chose is married w a 3 yr old. i also refuse to give her day off, so her salary becomes $360 ie. $20 more.
happy.gif
btw, i m getting a new one in asap cos i have a little rascal running around the house already now. for you, just see if you can get one in by jun. should have enuff safety margin ba.
happy.gif
 
fjm

Mine is supposed to be for preggie use. It's the Clarins Tonic Oil, or something like that?

U can use Palmer's? I have some frens who are allergic to it. Some ingredient, I forgot what. So I dun dare try Palmer's. How much issit?

pegsfur

I think if u r itching u shd start using. I was complaining to my gynae that my tummy was itching, & she said I shd start using some cream or at least moisturiser. That was at week 8?
 
maids again
i'm in the selection process now.. and part of me, feels bad that we are not able to ask the existing one to extend... coz of the reasons mentioned above.. she's good in childcare lor.. and working with no supervision type... very independent.. but i got a mum to supervise her and i know she dun like it.. hahaha..

mich
care to share abt ur maid's experinece?

-going for lunch now--
 
pegsfue, u should! (i advocate for plpe to use stretchmark creams but i dont.. i always forget to..maybe becos i already have, so i dont really bother..)

smurfy, ur maid ah, ho mia leh..
 
talk of stretchmark, I am prone to it no matter what anti-stretchmark cream that I used. Just hope that this time I will not get too many then. I have a friend without using any cream also did not have stretch-mark, her bb was small at full term and she did not put on much weight.
 
mich, my #1 is a gal...

talking abt maids, i can probably go on and on! haha... i chose 'older' maids coz i think they are less likely to have 'relationship' issues but looking at my current maid (she's 40+ and single), emotionally not very stable also (cries over every small thing) - so i've to rethink my hiring policy!
 
Hmm.. I guess stretch marks are kinda subject to genes. Yet I feel I shd do something abt it, coz if I do get stratch makrs, I will nvr know if I cud have done something abt it.

Spending a lot of money on BB liao. Shd not treat myself too shabbily haha.
 
wah..today is the right topic...I have not bought my stretchmark oil / cream due to my MS..

anyone can advise where to buy and hw much to buy? I also not sure which stretch mark cream / oil is gd ...
 
jul, not really leh.. my mother always proudly declares she doesnt get stretchmarks.. but i got them b4 i even got preggie!!

Maybe its my father's side that gets stretch marks.. haha..

Just wondering, men get stretch marks too right?
 
Jul, haahaa, gynae said also when weight is put on too fast, there will also be stretchmark, no matter how much anti-stretchmark cream is used.

About maid issue, I have nothing to contribute as dh and I are not keen to have a live-in helper and most of the time we opt for p/t maid or company to come and do cleaning once or twice a week. And it solve my headache of having no privacy.
 
babys

Yeah maybe u kena ur father's stretch mark genes lor. My mum got a lot of stretch marks. I'm praying that it's bcoz she din use any stretch mark cream, & also coz she had 4 kids!

Dun think men gets stretch marks unless they become really fat, then lost a lot of weight???
 
carefree

I din really do research. But someone told me Clarins Tonic Body Oil is good, so I bot lor. It costs $56 at Toa Payoh.
 
Pris

Aiyah it sounds more & more like a hopeless battle for me. Mum has stretch marks,... my tummy is expanding too fast,... I eat like a pig,... I got funny white line above belly button & dark line below belly button,... I am itching... Sigh, no hope liao *boo hoo*
 
Jul, haahaa, it was like that for me during 1st pregnancy, weight gained was fast and tummy was big. So got stretchmarks.

This pregnancy, think will start to gain weight soon as I am feeling hungry from Sat onward. So I begin my daily walk for half an hour in the morning and late afternoon and started on pregnancy yoga to stretch and refresh myself, feeling my energy coming back to me.

Been shopping with dh and ds for bb stuff, just brought a carseat from birth till 18kg during a bb sale.
 
hi kyrie, can update mine too ? I think you missed out on me prev. Thks : )

EDD: 17 Aug
Gynae: Dr Adrian Woodsworth
Hosp: TMC /Mount A
# of child: (first child)
Location: CCK
Gender: TBA
 
babyjon: If u are in your 13th weeks now, I suggest u can a gynae quickly, as OSCAR test (if you want it to be done) has to be done by 13 weeks. It's the test for down syndrome. Otherwise, you will hv to do CVS or amnio later in your pregnancy. If you skip all these, then detailed scan is at 20 weeks. Just in case, u want to know when are the critical times u need to do detailed checks.
 
smurfy! oh my... your maid really "got the guts" to do such thing... you know even we are working in the corporate world, we don't dare to behave in such a disrespectful fashion to our bosses! Even if she is good in childcare, those with bad attitude really cannot keep.

My maid is just average -- her housework is ok (sometimes miss out here and there), childcare is ok, not like fantastic or anything. The only good thing is she hasn't given me "trouble", doesn't tell lies, do crazy things or steal so I figured i have to live and let live and make do. Cos don't know whether if change maids will be worse or better, too big a risk to take. Actually I already knew her work was mediocre because she was actually my friend's maid for 1 year before she transferred to me. My friend cannot stand the fact she is only mediocre as she wants a better maid, so she ask me to try her out...

michele, wow, at week 12 can already tell its a girl! I am amazed. I only found out mine were girls at week 28 both time round.

pris, the stretchmark thing -- I put on 2-3kg every month but dun have stretch marks... so maybe its a hereditary thing?
 
re: maids
anyone using or got experience with mynmar maids? heard that some of them can speak mandarin?

im still thinking whether to have a maid anot?
cos mum will be taking care of BB, but scared she cant cope
 
fat bobo/tinkabel

haha, my MIL was like that when we just got married. She expected us to go to her place for dinner every night! We kind of reduced it slowly to twice a week, then once a week. Now with my boy, we'll go back once a week. During the first CNY after we got married, she expected us to just visit her relatives, and conveniently ignored the fact that i needed to pay respects to my own elders in the family. She put up a big fight then but luckily my FIL stepped in and asked us to go.

She also expected us to attend all family functions. But now with my boy, we could cook up a lot more excuses when we didn't wanna go. Hehehe.

I think after so many years, she had learned to let go more. My hb is her bao bei son.
 



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