Ilovesashimi, I know it is very painful to hear them cry, esp the wailing kind that sounds like 'please come to me, I need you... Don't leave me alone...' Many a times, I also gave up and carried my no. 2 but I found this is really not beneficial as she is a smart girl who knows that when she cries like mad, she will be attended to. So she always makes use of this to get my attention. I actually try to drag the time I take in responding to her cries(like first time cried for 10 min then I walked in, second time, cried for 15 min then I walked in....) I think they do feel tired after crying so will fall asleep after that.
Jen, pardon me... you are really having quite a challenging task 'training' and 'untraining' your kids.
I try to make my kids as secure as possible:
1. Afraid of the dark
With a dim light (green somemore, looks very ghostly honestly),I always assure my kids that we are just a door away and that they are in a very very safe environment. I believe that they understand perfectly your explanation. For my no. 1, since I transferred him to his own bed (with guard) shortly after no. 2 came along (cos he needs to give up his cot to her), he has never ever walked out of his bed to look for us. What he does each day when he wakes up is lie down in bed, wait for us to pick him up at the right time (same goes to afternoon nap)
2. Toys
Allow my children to bring 1 or 2 of his favourite toys to their cot or bed. These become their 'friends' every night and when they are awake, they play with them and keep themselves occupied till picked up by me or hubby. My no. 1 either brings his buses or trains to bed, no. 2 loves the book 'I see Barney' so she has it with her at night.
Leave a few stuffed toys in cot or bed, and teach them to say goodnight to these 'friends'. When they are awake in the night, having these 'friends' around them makes them feel that they are not alone.
3. Sleeping/dream bags
My children have been in sleeping bags or dream bags since birth. They are very used to wearing them to sleep. They don't get cold, thin enough (0.5 tog) to keep them cool since they don't sleep in an air-con room. My boy is now coming to 3 and he is still using it. He asked for his sleeping bag everytime he goes to bed.I am so thankful to find Grobags that can fit children up to 6 years old
I guess when he outgrows this grobag, I would have some trouble getting him to use a blanket instead... No. 2 uses hand-me-downs from no. 1. She also loves wearing it. Will wriggle her whole body and smile when we put her in it. She knows 'It's time for bed
' I find these bags also help in that they restrict their movement so they can walk around when they are awake (hahaha). At first, my mum said it was cruel to place them in sleeping bags cos they restrict movement but now she is totally convinced of the usefulness of these bags and went around telling her friends about them
4. Comfort items
Both of them have their own 'Bear Bear'. No. 1's was given to him when he turned 1 and it was love at the first sight...
He fell in love with and really cant live without it at sleeping times. He holds it to sleep and on a few occasions, I witnessed him 'getting ready to cry' in his sleep but the minute he grabbed hold of his bear bear, he smelled it a little, then stopped his 'want to cry' look
Very cute
Now, no. 2's bear bear is given by no. 1 when she came along. She still doesnt really treat that bear bear as her dear friend yet but we just place it next to her every night. Hopefully, she will grow to love it as the days pass
Okipoki, whenever my no. 1 is not well, we will go over to his room and sleep with him instead. I dont let him co-sleep with us cos worried can't get him back to his own room when he is well
Hope mummies here find my suggestion useful
They will not guarantee complete success for you but they work for my 2 little ones who are able to sleep through the night since very very young
Give it a try... Tweak a little to suit your kids lifestyle
