(2008/08) Aug 2008

haiz... me wana rant here! ya surprised to see me posting at this hr..

So pissed w my maid.

I went downstairs at 12MN to check on my gal see if she fell asleep. Cos I left her with the maid at 11pm, told her to let bb drink and then sleep.
But apparently, I could hear Chevelle is not asleep yet although the maid switched off all the lights.

So I opened the door and walked into the room and realised there was milking dripping from the corner of her mouth! Even in the dark! Cos i could see something glistening.

Then I switched on the light, realised the maid had the milk bottle in her hand and discovered bb's face was red! like little red dots, like kena rash.

So I immediately took the bib cloth wipe the dripping milk off and asked the maid why bb's face is so red. She told me bb scratched herself.

At this point, I was alrdy not happy. I was thinking, if bb is not asleep, why did she switch off the light and also how CAN SHE FEED BABY WHILE LYING DOWN LIKE THAT!!?! Somemore bb scratched herself too.

OK like that nvm. Then as I carried bb off the sofa bed, found the area beneath her head was one patch of wetness. I asked maid what that is. She said bb sweated. I didn't bother to check, but now on hindsight, I wondered if it's spilt milk. Didn't bother to smell. As I carried her off the bed, the maid went to put a piece of small towel over that area of wetness (makes me now wonder why she has to do that if it's just sweat right?)

I just went to check if bb still wants the remaining milk, and make her drink but she didn't want.

SO I COAXED HER TO SLEEP. And although Chevelle was fidgeting abit, I knw she was tired and she fell asleep in the 15min that I rocked/carried her around to sleep.

MY GOD... in my mind, I'm thinking, WHAT THE HECK is the maid doing? Is she so tired and lazy that she could not even just spare that 15-20min to just coax bb to sleep (which means rocking and cradling/walking bb around) then she also can sleep earlier. I know the maid sometimes doesn't hv enough sleep which is why this afternoon I told her to take a nap with bb while bb was hving her afternoon nap which was abt 2hrs. Of course, the maid didn't sleep the whole 2 hrs but I'm v sure she slept at least 30min, cos i spot check and did see her napping w bb.


Sorry for the long rant... but this is really bothering me. Wonder if later 3/4AM if shd wake up to supervise this maid when bb is awake for her next feed.

And now I'm definitely going to "lecture" her when I'm up and tell her what's the proper way to do things. SOOO pissed!

It really makes me re-consider if I want to let the maid take care of baby at night.
 


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the babies picture so cute!!
Kai almost missed the picture session know ... cos maid was outside as Kai was sleeping in the pram then #1 had to pass urine, i was busily trying to change him, get his clothes, etc.
Then took KAI out of the pram .. hehe, made it in time for the boys' shot ;)))))

Shay,
I should have quite a few of your little "Bumble Bee" ... cos i took quite some from KAI's angle.
 
msapple,
Thanks so much for using your place, really, i think we've made a mess of it as well.

1. My #1 really enjoyed himself at the "kitchen station" - now making me think if i shld have 1 set? hahha, but my house no space liao ... kekekke.
2. Thanks for letting me use the room to drain my BM - managed to have a peaceful buffet dinner till 10pm.

3. I had a good session chatting (while waiting to meet hubby) and sharing of how-tos.

4. It's a lovely place u've got and yes, i'm gonna try to find that train wall sticker for my #1. He loves trains - any sort esp Thomas the train. Paiseh, he made your #1 upset for a while becos of the train .... managed to get him to return it and apologise. ;)
 
Missy,
do send me my KAI's pic and my #1. Me too busy to take pic yesterday and with so many photographers around ..... dun need liao. ;)

Pics .... send to me oso. It can be quite tiring to send individually .. so can shoot mass mail ba?
Maybe someone wants to send a mail to all mommies who were present yesterday? then we can use that email thread to send the pics? If got time then can filter out but if not, mommies can filter out themselves ;)
 
val, hope everything is fine. i used to have these kind of probs too, but now not so bad coz' bb has learnt to sleep thru the night. my bb also sleeps in the cot with my maid, who sleeps on a sofa bed. we use bb monitor to check that nothing gets too out of hand. my hb does bb's last feed and once the 5am feed was dropped, my maid does not do any more feeds coz' my bb's next feed is 8am at my MIL's place. when i was still on ML, my maid would do the earlier feeds, e.g. 4am and 8am. sometimes when i wake up, i would find that bb has vomitted. i suspect it's coz my maid never burp properly and after feeding, put bb to sleep immediately (coz' she also tired and want to sleep). told her many times already but she still dun listen. so i try not to let her do more than 1-2 feeds a day if poss. sometimes if i'm really tired then i'll let her do the morning feeds.

i'm not surprised your maid didn't own up. mine also tries to lie and is darn good at it. this kinda of thing very hard to nip in the bud. if caught red handed, u can scold. if u suspect but no evidence, u can give her warning and she'll prob be more vigilant for awhile before starting to take short cut again. sometimes just have to close one eye lor. if u're worried, then better do spot check or let bb sleep with u instead until much older.

my hb and i were discussing yest - we feel the maid can't really handle bb when crying even though she has a son of his own. this is esp so when we are in the car. so i ended up sitting behind with bb when we have long car trips and my maid sits in front with my hb. sounds ridiculous but what to do - she's quite useless when it comes to pacifying bb. the other day when my boy was screaming in the car, she gave up pacifying him and even put her hands to her ears. my hb was thinking - what the?!? we didn't hire her to tell us how irritated she was with all the crying behind. amazingly when i'm with bb behind, he hardly cries or at least, i manage to contain the crying! <sigh> useless maid!
 
msapple, forgot to ask u - where did u buy your play yard? i have one exactly like yours but it's only one set. yours looks like you got an extension or shared with another mommy the same set, but u got the activity corner while the other mommy got the door right? i'm thinking of extending it like yours when my bb finds the current square space too restricted...or when i have #2, heehee.
 
Managed to talk to some of the mommies i've not met before ... so many of us ...
for Kai ... i guess u all recognise me cos of him
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))))) and his special hairdo. kekekeke.
Hope u all din mistaken the maid for me or vice versa ..... hehheee.

Dongle,
Thanks for the Ameda parts and the inouvi makeup.
Now i can start to Da Ban more mei mei oredi .. cos my old makeup was quite long liaoz .. so dun dare to use too often .. scarly breakout.

ZA makeup session - it's a 2 hour session for basic makeup la, vv cheap only ... not the few hundred dollars package. So long got 15 pple, then can arrange 1 session. Basics only. I din even know putting eye shadow oso got 2 layers? used to know only 1 layer ... hehe, auntie fashion oredi.

Keep you all posted alright?
 
krex,
babies who cries alot with the helper. better monitor ba ... cos babies vv sensitive one, if those good to them, they like, they will smile and play .. if always crying with them means something they really dun like abt the person.
if only in car ok but if all the time then better be more vigilant.

I leave my baby in my room. I have open door concept so when baby cries, maid can hear oso and come over ..... unless i need some privacy then i close door. So she knows that if baby wake up, etc I will know. Initially i will wake up together, but nowadays sometimes i oso slept thru ......

then again, i oso wake up to pump .... so i'll be awake whenever she feeds baby. haha, i've a sofa (ikea 3 seater) in my room, initially she feeds baby on the sofa n sometimes i also see her and chat with her if i too lazy to wake up. That means no privacy la.
 
Roiv,
Your gal is so lovely ;) - thanks for letting me carry her - my dreams of having a gal.

your elder son is also vv dong shi - takes good care of mei mei. it was nice chatting with u too.
 
shint, my maid is not allowed to enter my master room and study. she has to seek my permission to enter to clean the rooms. not comfortable if my maid has access to these 2 rooms coz' i want my privacy. if only 2 of us, i will instruct my maid to look out for bb while i go pump. when i was on ML, she cldn't really cope coz' she had to take care of bb and also prepare the meals. now that i'm on leave again till yr end, i plan to BF bb more often so i dun run into a situation where she has to feed bb or look after him before meal times and i have to pump.

my bb is ok with her if he's not crying. once he starts crying (most of the time coz' sleepy or bored), my maid is unable to pacify him. dunno why also. i guess she can't provide the love and affection that i give my bb. coz' i tend to hug him and stroke him. maids dun usu do that, heh. in the car, he cries a lot coz' he dun like to be restricted. can see he's always kicking vigourously wanting to get out. so the best way is to talk to him, stroke him and hold his hand all the way. no rest for me unless he decides to take a short nap. but no choice lah, until he learns how to enjoy car rides!
 
krex,
wow she covered her ears ? I would be quite offended. My maid is very good at denying, i wont use the word lying as yet. She can deny and can be so real and confident in it. She will be so firm that you really will want to believe her. But a few times we caught her denying and told her off. She immediately shut up.

When we go out in car rides, I will sit behind with bb and the maid.

val,
why dont u give the last feed and make Chevelle sleep instead of asking your maid to do it ? I think having the parents "tuck" them in is a very impt process. I personally will not leave my maid sleeping in the room with the baby alone. That is why I do all her feedings day and night, my good life maid has never in the last 4 months ever gotten up once to even make a single milk for me. Even thou the milk stuff is in the room she sleeps in, I will on the dim lights and make the milk, while she snoring away.. sigh .. I tell her that she more good life than me. What upsets me is that she tends to sleep when in the car or when outside, which hb feels it's very rude. Eg that day we went hospital to visit my new baby niece, and she sat on the sofa and slept. I feel it's ridiculas cos she sleeps earlier than me and gets uninterrupted sleep and she just doze off in public. As thou she is overly worked etc. Even I dont doze off like that.
 
Shint,
Its ok, haha I am still trying to teach my #1 to share her toys with other children esp her favourite 'Thomas the train'.
Erm so far I nv see anyway selling Thomas the train wallpaper but you can try searching for it.

Val,
For me I dont let my maid take care my girl at night so she got no reason to sleep in the noon so she can concentrate taking her during the day while we are at work. Sometime she do unable to finish her work but she volunteer to do finish it before goes to bed so I didnt force her and she cannot complain on that also. No matter what we alway have to supervise the maid lor.

Val,krex78, Catherine,
It alway a headache when come to maid. Do you all ever try doing a working performamce appraisal with them once a month? I am doing that right now, and I find it good to do that at least both are in a state where can open up and said the problem, what to do improve etc. And my rule and regulation for her to follow is really alot and I do the appraisal with her according to the rule and regulation that I set. So from there the maid will know whether her way, attitude is right or to our liking. So usually I wont scold her but just said her in a very firm tone.
 
hi mummies

thanks msapple for putting us up at ur place..sorry..ar..my girl keeps regurgitating milk all over the place..*paiseh*..must be very shiong to clean up the place after that..

Nini
heehee..hope u like the present..cuz i bought one for kaer too!..heehe..cuz now she already taking cereal..so i thought of buying that as gift..very pretty hor...?

me bling bling? heehe..u mean my top ? heehee .u noe ar..i realised after i carried kaer that the shimmering thing on my shirt will come off a bit..and when i went home..kaer had all the shimmering thing on her face and head!..heehee..bling bling bb...

thanks for all the concern u mummies had for kaer about the 2nd fall..i promise no repeat of history liao...otherwise, 3rd time fall..really will become gong already...:p

oh ya...thanks for the xmas present too..i dun noe who give me one...but i got the FP cookie sorter toy..very cute.
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YLN,
its ok, no worry. Oh didnt notice you are wearing shimmering thing on ur top but i like the way you dress up yesterday. Cool and nice!
Oh ya btw u bring ur to see a dentist?

Think all the mommies are wondering whose gift your baby and toddler get from
 
morning mummies.

yln,
yu ze also got some shimmering thing on his face. so it must be from you lah. hahaha.... i was thinking where he get that from. it got transfer from you to kaer then to yu ze.
 
Val,
Your Chevelle sleeps with your maid at night? I dun dare to leave my kids with my maid tho coz I know maid not like us, we will make sure our BB is clean, full and happy. For them, if BB dun want to sleep they may just sleep b4 BB or if BB dun want to drink they may not care also.

Re: maid
Think my maid is one of the most "need to be trained" more type. Guess what she did . . .
1) She used tape water to make milk for my #1 (she said she forget to use cook water), unlucky I saw it.
2) She dunno how to count the milk time. She always feed either 1 hor earlier or 1 hour later. Eg, there was one day I left for office at 8:15am and she fed my gal. Then at 10:30am I saw from my camera she fed my gal again, I called back home immediately to stop her. Same day 5:15pm she fed my gal and when I reached home at 7:15pm she intent to feed my gal again! I asked her 3hours after 5:15pm is what time she told me 7:15pm!!!
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3) My gal's bibs forever can see milk stain coz she forever never wash it clean
4) I need to remind her daily that she need to make milk for my son to drink at 7:30am coz he need to go school at 8am
5) I need to told her to wash my son's hand and legs when back from outside else she will not do that.

and lotso more . . . sigh . . .
 
cat, i also think my maid sleeps more than me. sometimes when my hb finish feed, she's already fast asleep. but i make her prepare my pump set after my last pump at 11.30pm so i can use it again at ard 5am. when she fails to do it, i lecture her and stress that she's already having more rest than me. she can still take afternoon naps but as a working mom, i dun even get to rest at work. now we also implement penalty. if she does not do what is expected, we'll confiscate her hp. i'm quite unhappy that she spends 1 hour talking on her hp. i dun even spend so much time on the phone lor!

msapple, we sat her down to talk when her performance slipped real bad, and after feedback from in-laws that she was sloppy in her work, mainly due to use of hp. that's why we have the confiscate hp policy. i think my maid really got very gd life. at my in laws place she dun even need to feed bb or cook. just general housework only.
 
cylyn,
Dun worry about your Yu Ze's weight as long as he is drinking and playing well. My Shervalle also very petite (coz she look like me very petite also). Recently I a bit worry coz she dun drink well as she only drink less than 50ml and she will shout and refuse to drink liao. Very difficult to get her finish her milk lo.
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krex,
The worst thing is I need to work and she will need to handle my girl at home alone. So now bcoz of her my mum need to come from Msian and stay here very often (that means my dad is alone in Msia). We dare not leave the BB with her alone coz she definately CANNOT handle at the moment. But then if change maid I worry come those can do but stuborn type coz my previous maid like to tell lies despite she can do work. This type even more dangerous coz if one day anything happen to my gal (touch wood) she will definate not report to me one lo.
 
cocomo,
think ur maid main problem is forgetful just like my maid when she first come. But I trained her to use her brain more often when I am still on maternity leave. I alway test her knowledge on taking care baby. I wont told her straight what is wrong, I made her think what she did wrong.

Btw I also bought one camera from Dlink, I give up on configuring it even my friend who is IT expect also couldnt get it work, think if really no choice got to get dlink technician to come do it which they charge nearly $200 for it.

krex78,
Ask ur in law to get her to work at their house lor including taking care baby, dont let them too relax during their working hour. But of cos not to overload her but just make sure she is not too relax. If not need time will become worst
 
sometimes I think having a maid is like having another child/baby that has to be taken care of instead of helping us ...

and most importantly they can never give love and attention as much as we do to our babies. simply because they are MAID/ HELPER.

Its just the matter of how much we are willing to compromise/close an eye. (but not safety issue.. this thing can not be compromised).

Maid cant be trusted 100%. never treat them like family, but treat them as employee with respect , so they will respect you too and hopefully love your children as well.

this is what I learn from having a maid for many yrs.

In my opinion, those who has INDONESIAN MAID.. DONT LET THEM BULLY YOU.. closing ears when baby cry is rude and unacceptable to me.
If they are fail to pacify them at least they can try to help you do something else.

This is just my humble opinion
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masapple..
heehee..thanks for complimenting..actually, i wore the cap cuz i have been dropping lotsa hair..and hair abit haywire yestrd..so decided to just wear cap..no need to tie hair nice nice..n the shimmering top..sigh..cannot wear when i go out with kaer liao..cuz otherwise she will take away all the shimmer..:p..cuz she like to rub rub rub her face on my clothes..

celyn!..heehee sorry ar...Yu Ze become bling boy!..keekee...paiseh ...
 
Good Morning Mommies!
So many posts to read...
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It was nice to meet up with so many mommies and cuties yday...

Msapple,
Thanks for opening up your place for the gathering...think we left a mess for you and your helper man.
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Snow &amp; Megan,
Thanks for coordinating too.
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Megan,
My #1 had a great time playing with your #1.
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hashisan
i noticed it was ur gal who had her ears pierced? u put on ear studs for her too?

maids
actually, when i was in maspple's room during one of those moments yestd, i think there were only maids there carrying bbs..n there was one..wow...very fluent and eloquent leh..talk to each other until very happy ..speak to me somemore..very garang..told me something abt my bb and i just replied something..for my maid ar if she come..i think she dun dare talk to other madams..or other maids...
i also dun trust my maid very much...she is ok..but i dun let her touch bb..cuz she so small sizd..bb struggle..i think she will fall...plus she got no experience with bb..n she not very honest..got times she do housework, do wrong, still dun admit...so, i wont trust her with bb..cuz she wont tell me if she do anything wrong..just my opinion
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Morning mummies!
Hehee.. nice meeting so many mummies yesterday!
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Msapple,
really thanks to u for hosting us. I like ur decor and ur babes have so many nice toys!
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M2B,
finally got to see ur gals in person. They are v pretty! And u too! 2 kids oredi u still maintain so well! *Envy*

Mummies with grp pic or my boy's pix (the one wearing red like santa claus), pls send them to [email protected] k? Thanks a lot! Mummies with fb can also add me with this email.
 
cocomo,
same same, my #2 also refuse to finish her milk there is afew day in a day she only drink 300ml+
She seems to be not hungry cos she doesnt cry for milk and when we put the teat into her mouth every 3 hrly, she sure scream and cry till we surrender. But after that I did try luck change her to NUK, then slightly better and this few day her intake back to normal every three hour 120ml. Think that few days is just a phase where she refuse milk or just simply no appetite or not sure whether is it becos of the teat also. So stressful hor. I got super lot of bottle use a few times only. She seems to like changing her teat lah. Initially pigeon teat ok then suddenly dont want and we change to standard neck one ok for afew week then need to change again. Waste alot of my money.
 
re maid:

today seems to b a complaining about maid day ,hee
i have my fair share of drama last night. kept texting catherine to complain. haha
one moment my maid was happily enjoying herself n laughing away. next wen i told her i need to bring her 4 medical check up.......the drama begun. she hold her head, hair messy n say she feel like fainting n vomiting. i told her how can it b since she was perfectly fine b4 tat. we all knew she was putting up a show. think she is afraid of drawing blood. she was cooking halfway with the fire on, then hubby came back n she imm sit at the kitchen n put her head down like she is sleeping. hubby say the food is not burnt, obviously she heard hubby n quickly put up an act. she keep saying she is sick n can't go medical. i say the mre u need to go. then she say she feel cold with goosebumps n started crying. i measure her tempt. i am hotter than her!!! she only 36.2degrees. then we ask if she wants to b sent back cos w/o medical, govn will send her back n it's only to test if she has aids or preg. they dun care if u r sick. then she realized can't siam liao but she has to still put up a show. we also played along. i ask her to show me the meds tat she took n told her to take my panadol instead n made her a glass of ribena n say she must b alittle low blood to feel faint n she shld b fine tom. told her to rest well n we'll bring her 4 medic

al today or latest tom if not our permit will b revoked n she has to go back to her nasty agent which i dun want it. imm she look better n say she is better can go medical liao n wen bb cry at midnight, she came up to the rm to pass me gripe water in case i needed it. hubby say this is reverse phycology which worked cos she felt paiseh n work harder.
sigh, the "games" we have to play or act.....

val,
i started to train my bb to sleep thru cos i didn;t want my maid to handle bb n sleep with my bb. i also took over bathing bb unless wkends i need to prepare to go out at the same time, i ask her to help. i was tough taking night duty but i managed to train bb n it's all worth it. thanks to vone for giving me the tips n encouraging me to b more hands on with the bb. now bb is starting to recognize pp. the more i feel u shld take over for this season lei. i did it jus on time cos bb wants me wen she sees strangers n i dun let maid feed bb laio unless no choice. yes i am a little sleep deprived but i bond well with bb n she setles down fast with me
 
msapple,
I agree with u, my maid is definately not lazy type but really forgetful and also their life in Philipine is so diff from here in Spore so need to let her have time to adopt. On sat, my hubby just asked her to write down everyday what she does wrongly and b4 she sleeps she read it to make sure she dun repeat again.
 
good morning mommies!

it was great meeting u ladies and all the cute babies! i took quite a lot of pics. will sort them out later when i have the time and email to u all okay? btw, pardon my amateurish photography skills. Heh.

msapple, you are a great host. U even set up playareas for the toddlers! So thoughtful!

Btw, who is the mommy (hubby and son) who stayed behind to chit chat with msapple, shint, Shirley (not sure I gt right or not) and me? Msapple and I tot you were april tan but I think we got it wrong! Haha!
 
hashisan,
Me too agree with what you said. I alway told other that having a maid is that having a child. And is alway us a women taking care of the kids and handling a maid.
And yah maid cant be trusted 100%. Me too treat them as employee with respect.
I got to check with snow74 for the pizza cost before I can calculate the total amount. and will email the mommies the amount to transfer.

Snow74 and Megan,
Really thanks for helping in the gathering yesterday and make it a success one. Thanks so much!

YLN,
haha me too dropping lot of hair, at time I also wear cap go out.
Yesterday my house not really in mess but really got a lot of hairs. haha

Maid,
Every night came back from work, me will take care my #1 and #2, clean and bathe them, feed them. If not my maid 1am also cannot finish her work.
 
YLN , yes i had misaki ears pierced when she was 2 mths old. the ear stud is the one used to pierce her ears, i havent changed them to real ear stud yet
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missysz,
Actually i am still thinking whether to setup the playyard cos it really took up the space but is snow74 suggestion to set up cos at least we can constraint the toddler at a area so they wont be running about.

who is the one who is asking about the playyard, i read it somewhere. erm the playyard is I share with another mommy to get a set of 6 panels and I took 2 activities panel and my that mommy friend took one with 2 doors.

Oh mommies,
btw my friend is organising a Xmas Carol on the Lawn | FREE Invitation‏. a xmas carol with some refreshments on 23rd December, at 6.30pm for about an hour or so in the vicinity of Bukit Timah.

If you're interested to bring your kid over and enjoy the Xmas cheer (there'll be Santa Claus and his Elves).

Space is limited to 50 adults + 30 kids, so on a first-come-first-serve basis ya
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Do let me know by 1pm. But no garanttee there is still space I got to check with her again first
 
hi,
I also think my maid abit deaf. hahaha. tell her things always must repeat then she hear. That day in the car, i told her wait dont open the door I reverse more, and she open the door while i was reversing. She say she never hear me. Or if i ask her do something, she will repeat half of what I say then I have to say again. I dono is it her understanding problem, hearing or just pretending. Then I told her, say she make me like broken recorder keep repeating, and if I abit louder dont think I shouting cos I no strength to keep repeating myself.

now my mom start telling her that chinese dont like see black face in the morning. Esp CNY time. So prepare her cos sometimes she like "dead man walking".. I go out with her if she push the pram, she will be at least 10 steps behind me. And I keep having to slow down for her. If I push then she be still 10 steps behind me and still I have to slow down wait for her. So I always ask her "why no battery is it"

msapple,
ya we sat down with her to go thru what she do wrong, make her write down what she do wrong etc .. all do before. It will be ok awhile then after that go back to normal again.
 
2nd time mummies,
Would like your advice...assuming no budget constraint, what would be a good gift for a 2 yr old girly girl who already has loads of toys and clothes?
 
msapple: Thanks u very much for making the effort to arrange the gathering... the buffet,x'mas exchange,setting up toys etc. Really xie xie ni!
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mommies i got take pics with some of u, but i dunno who is who coz didnt get to see ur name tag.. hmm.. how ah??
 
so many cute babies..

Hmm, i think i spot M2B's Mae &amp; Raine, msapple's Small A, Roiv's Allivier, Shint's Kai, Celyn's Yu Ze
Can't identify the rest of the cuties, hope to have an opp to meet up with them!!
 

hashisan
oh..ic...did ur girl cry out in pain ?? where did u bring her for the piercing?? am thinking when i shld bring kaer..otherwise she look like tom boy..better doll her up a bit...
 

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