(2008/07) July 2008
- Thread starter cherylkjh
- Start date
Hey girls,
Tada!! I finally did it!
Help me spread the word ok?
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/messages/450761/6620749.html
Tada!! I finally did it!
Help me spread the word ok?
http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/messages/450761/6620749.html
in-house delivery system: i meant this: http://gingerbreadmum.blogspot.com/2012/01/special-delivery.html
jogwyn
Active Member
Smiggle: what happened to your maid? I think my place is not so much of dirty but messy, sometimes can be like war zone if time overruns and have to chase them to bed rather than having them keep toys. I feel I have to manage my expectations and no longer can keep the place as neat as I want, unless I want to be sleep-deprived.
Hey mummies! I'm writing an article called "10 things a pregnant woman doesn't want to hear, or be treated". I'll need a quote of no more than 5 lines, with mum's name, age and occupation to authenticate her quote. Do you remember any insensitive things people said/did to you when you were preggie?
My own contribution is: I'm tired of people giving me a sorry face when they find out I'm expecting another girl, and then try to make it better by saying "Girl again? Oh well, as long as the baby is healthy, right?". Or worse, "It's OK, you're still young, you can try again for a boy"
Let me know soon ok?
Or if you know anyone else who's got something to share, just pass this along. I'll need to receive quotes by end of this week, 3 Feb!! Can either PM me or email me at [email protected] Thanks alot
My own contribution is: I'm tired of people giving me a sorry face when they find out I'm expecting another girl, and then try to make it better by saying "Girl again? Oh well, as long as the baby is healthy, right?". Or worse, "It's OK, you're still young, you can try again for a boy"
Let me know soon ok?
PInkB - when you write an article about "10 things a woman who has just delivered doesn't want to hear" - let me know ya 
..got lots to contribute in that one..haha
Maids - my maid whose 2 yr contract will be up in august just informed me that she wants to continue. can anyone advise me (1) who pays for her passport which is expiring soon in aug to be renewed? (2) how do I renew her contract with me? must go thru agency again? (3) if she wants to go back for the 2 week break, we pay for her air tix and the 2 week salary during home leave? and if she does not want to go back, we just pass her the plane ticket money? anything else?
can PM me the reply if you like ..thanks in advance
..got lots to contribute in that one..haha Maids - my maid whose 2 yr contract will be up in august just informed me that she wants to continue. can anyone advise me (1) who pays for her passport which is expiring soon in aug to be renewed? (2) how do I renew her contract with me? must go thru agency again? (3) if she wants to go back for the 2 week break, we pay for her air tix and the 2 week salary during home leave? and if she does not want to go back, we just pass her the plane ticket money? anything else?
can PM me the reply if you like ..thanks in advance
sdchick
Active Member
Happy new year everyone!!! Just came back from home trip back in Kalimantan and a short visit to Surabaya. The kids enjoyed their time with their cousins. Everything is well until the last 2 days, Emma got gastroenteritis. Haizzzzz.
Goodie bags.
Last year for Emma's party at school I made some cupcakes and ham and cheese sandwiches using cookie cutters for shapes and some fish crackers. For goodie bags I gave bookmarks,crayons,plus some M&Ms, chocopie, milo. For older kids like Ashley, I have given snake and ladder travel games, mcdonalds happy meal (too lazy to prepare). This year we invited 5 close friends for a mini scrapbooking party at Papermarket, with 4 cupcakes to take home each kid.
SY
HUGS...
Agree with the advice from the mummies here. Just keep calm and observe. If he wants counselling and haven't gotten the time to find, find one and gave him the schedule.
Cellow
Can imagine the hectic period without the luggage!! Ours went into cargo and we had to wait for the airline to get it. The trip was taking too long, Emma didn't want to eat, the 3 hr drive made Emma sick and she vomitted in the car *yikes*
Ashley has her own room and Emma sleeps with us... hopefully until next 2 months. We have ordered a new bed for her and waiting for the mattress. Hopefully she'll be ok sleeping with her sister together. Our room has an interconnecting door to the kids room, so I will leave it open when they sleep.
Cin bunny
I paid for the helper's passport. To renew contract, very easy. I first drafted my own "contract" specifying the salary, etc, and get her to sign. To extend, you do not need to go thru agency. Just just need to purchase insurance, then renew at MOM website, and then collect the new work permit at Tanjong Pagar. Better still, I used NTUC insurance, they do everything for me (the renewing, getting the new work permit etc).
I give my helper 1 day off per month, so if she wants to go back for 2 weeks, she can use the 14 days leave, but if she used it, I will dock her salary (pro-rated) for additional days. You mean, she went back and doesnt' want to go back to Singapore to work again? just need to cancel her work permit.
Goodie bags.
Last year for Emma's party at school I made some cupcakes and ham and cheese sandwiches using cookie cutters for shapes and some fish crackers. For goodie bags I gave bookmarks,crayons,plus some M&Ms, chocopie, milo. For older kids like Ashley, I have given snake and ladder travel games, mcdonalds happy meal (too lazy to prepare). This year we invited 5 close friends for a mini scrapbooking party at Papermarket, with 4 cupcakes to take home each kid.
SY
HUGS...
Agree with the advice from the mummies here. Just keep calm and observe. If he wants counselling and haven't gotten the time to find, find one and gave him the schedule.
Cellow
Can imagine the hectic period without the luggage!! Ours went into cargo and we had to wait for the airline to get it. The trip was taking too long, Emma didn't want to eat, the 3 hr drive made Emma sick and she vomitted in the car *yikes*
Ashley has her own room and Emma sleeps with us... hopefully until next 2 months. We have ordered a new bed for her and waiting for the mattress. Hopefully she'll be ok sleeping with her sister together. Our room has an interconnecting door to the kids room, so I will leave it open when they sleep.
Cin bunny
I paid for the helper's passport. To renew contract, very easy. I first drafted my own "contract" specifying the salary, etc, and get her to sign. To extend, you do not need to go thru agency. Just just need to purchase insurance, then renew at MOM website, and then collect the new work permit at Tanjong Pagar. Better still, I used NTUC insurance, they do everything for me (the renewing, getting the new work permit etc).
I give my helper 1 day off per month, so if she wants to go back for 2 weeks, she can use the 14 days leave, but if she used it, I will dock her salary (pro-rated) for additional days. You mean, she went back and doesnt' want to go back to Singapore to work again? just need to cancel her work permit.
cin
if your helper is good, then great that she plans to extend with u. nowadays hard to get decent helpers. my ex neighbour just sent her new one back after 1.5 weeks. super lousy attitude!
my mum usually ask agent to do it but they would charge of cos. if u dun mind the paperwork, then do it yourself. much much cheaper. my fren also applied for her maid herself i think. it's mainly the admin work that takes up time.
SD
yes focus focus. i think after the weekend and all that happened, i have learnt to let go. it is just too tiring to know what he is doing and so what if i know? i can't continuously know what he is doing and prevent it right? so better to focus on the impt stuff and just work on us instead of working on him.
it certainly makes everything much lighter for me and i find it easier to breathe....
PB
hmmm, it seemed a long time ago that i was preggy! haha so no idea what i don't want to hear/be treated. like cin, the after delivery one is much easier...haha...
let me think about this for a while....
if your helper is good, then great that she plans to extend with u. nowadays hard to get decent helpers. my ex neighbour just sent her new one back after 1.5 weeks. super lousy attitude!
my mum usually ask agent to do it but they would charge of cos. if u dun mind the paperwork, then do it yourself. much much cheaper. my fren also applied for her maid herself i think. it's mainly the admin work that takes up time.
SD
yes focus focus. i think after the weekend and all that happened, i have learnt to let go. it is just too tiring to know what he is doing and so what if i know? i can't continuously know what he is doing and prevent it right? so better to focus on the impt stuff and just work on us instead of working on him.
it certainly makes everything much lighter for me and i find it easier to breathe....
PB
hmmm, it seemed a long time ago that i was preggy! haha so no idea what i don't want to hear/be treated. like cin, the after delivery one is much easier...haha...
let me think about this for a while....
sdchick
Active Member
SY
Yes yes yes. So little things we can control. Take me as an example. My hb works in China, 3 weeks out of a month. I've heard about how aggressive the chinese ladies over there and what can I do? I had so little control, I just need to trust my hb. I told him about my concerns,and just warn him to be careful. Heard some scary stories on those who put pills on the guys drink etc. Also told him that I trusted him and if he gets any temptation please think about the children. That's all I said to him lor. I mean, even if I video call every night, doesn't mean he can't go out afterwards? what about the weekends? the possible scenarios are so many I would get crazy just to think about it.
PB
The "Girl again" line sounds so familiar!! I still heard about it up til now and last week during CNY, my MIL told me.. How about you trying for a boy! My in laws relatives also commented.. your girl is so smart! So sayang she is a girl. it would have been better if she's a boy! *ROLLS EYES*
Yes yes yes. So little things we can control. Take me as an example. My hb works in China, 3 weeks out of a month. I've heard about how aggressive the chinese ladies over there and what can I do? I had so little control, I just need to trust my hb. I told him about my concerns,and just warn him to be careful. Heard some scary stories on those who put pills on the guys drink etc. Also told him that I trusted him and if he gets any temptation please think about the children. That's all I said to him lor. I mean, even if I video call every night, doesn't mean he can't go out afterwards? what about the weekends? the possible scenarios are so many I would get crazy just to think about it.
PB
The "Girl again" line sounds so familiar!! I still heard about it up til now and last week during CNY, my MIL told me.. How about you trying for a boy! My in laws relatives also commented.. your girl is so smart! So sayang she is a girl. it would have been better if she's a boy! *ROLLS EYES*
bluebearypie
Active Member
PB,
Sorry, preggy brain - everything forgotten. Even labour pains seem to be a fuzzy memory. It's the body's way to help prepare for another child. Haha.
Maybe Mr bbp will remember cos I'm sure he kena's from me whenever someone says something insensitive or something I deem insensitive.
Good luck for your venture. Those containers are so cute!
SD,
Oh no! I hope Emma is better already?
Sorry, preggy brain - everything forgotten. Even labour pains seem to be a fuzzy memory. It's the body's way to help prepare for another child. Haha.
Maybe Mr bbp will remember cos I'm sure he kena's from me whenever someone says something insensitive or something I deem insensitive.
Good luck for your venture. Those containers are so cute!
SD,
Oh no! I hope Emma is better already?
SDchick
Oh didn't know mr sd works in china. Bluebunny worked there before and he's had china girls flash him their xxxs while walking on street! He walk by, they sitting on stools and just lift their skirts at him. No panties! And when he goes for massage, they ask if he would like to "put his xiao didi in their xiao meimei". So funny.
Hope emma is better! Poppy also getting a new bed soon! Thursday!!
Sy
Hope things are slowly on the mend. Was the date ok?
Bbp
Yup yup ok. Ask mr bbp if he remembers
Ps everyone, I am officially NESTING! Haha. Will attack one room a day when poppy is in school. Hehe. Man, nesting should SO hit daddies instead!
Btw pageone has major closing down sale. Everything from 50% off! But go during off peak hours. We went on sat evening (silly us) and were told the queue was 3.5 hours long!
Oh didn't know mr sd works in china. Bluebunny worked there before and he's had china girls flash him their xxxs while walking on street! He walk by, they sitting on stools and just lift their skirts at him. No panties! And when he goes for massage, they ask if he would like to "put his xiao didi in their xiao meimei". So funny.
Hope emma is better! Poppy also getting a new bed soon! Thursday!!
Sy
Hope things are slowly on the mend. Was the date ok?
Bbp
Yup yup ok. Ask mr bbp if he remembers
Ps everyone, I am officially NESTING! Haha. Will attack one room a day when poppy is in school. Hehe. Man, nesting should SO hit daddies instead!
Btw pageone has major closing down sale. Everything from 50% off! But go during off peak hours. We went on sat evening (silly us) and were told the queue was 3.5 hours long!
Cellow
Both sleep in their room where they share.
Cinbunny
I paid for her airticket home but she pays for her own passport. I just let her go for 2 weeks paid actually. Yes, just go and renew online at MOM but before that buy all your insurance and stuff from ntuc online becos MOM will need you to key in the policy number while renewing. Then after that go tanjong pagar to collect the new work permit.
Both sleep in their room where they share.
Cinbunny
I paid for her airticket home but she pays for her own passport. I just let her go for 2 weeks paid actually. Yes, just go and renew online at MOM but before that buy all your insurance and stuff from ntuc online becos MOM will need you to key in the policy number while renewing. Then after that go tanjong pagar to collect the new work permit.
bluebearypie
Active Member
Cellow,
Can can. No prob. Just email me. You got my email address?
PB,
Ok, will ask Mr bbp
Can can. No prob. Just email me. You got my email address?
PB,
Ok, will ask Mr bbp
michelletan
Active Member
cinbunny, I paid for her passport renewal and did everything online myself. MOM is super efficient and insurance also fast so its very easy. She paid for her own trip back before renewal, and once decided to stay, i paid for the airticket after renewal.
cellow, sounds like sleep training may solve your dilemma, but sleep training is a test of heart and mind so you need to consider carefully. if status quo works out fine, then dont rock the boat loh...
PB, the thing that irks me the most is when ppl keep coming up to rub my tummy (strangers even) and then say, "oh, your tummy so small... think your baby very small, next time difficult to tend to. " *guan ni shen me shi?* Grrr!
Finally signed eboy at new school today, starting 1 mar. I'm excited that it offers swimming lessons too, in time as we were looking for one also! the teachers looks great but place looks more packed and messy compared to current school which has a huge and clean compound. well, can;t get the ideal place so something's gotto go? eboy loves it cos he says he can wear his thomas shirt to school everyday, instead of the school uniform which he dislikes. haha.. I'm very excited!!!!
cellow, sounds like sleep training may solve your dilemma, but sleep training is a test of heart and mind so you need to consider carefully. if status quo works out fine, then dont rock the boat loh...
PB, the thing that irks me the most is when ppl keep coming up to rub my tummy (strangers even) and then say, "oh, your tummy so small... think your baby very small, next time difficult to tend to. " *guan ni shen me shi?* Grrr!
Finally signed eboy at new school today, starting 1 mar. I'm excited that it offers swimming lessons too, in time as we were looking for one also! the teachers looks great but place looks more packed and messy compared to current school which has a huge and clean compound. well, can;t get the ideal place so something's gotto go? eboy loves it cos he says he can wear his thomas shirt to school everyday, instead of the school uniform which he dislikes. haha.. I'm very excited!!!!
bluebearypie
Active Member
bluebearypie
Active Member
Mich,
You must look SUPER friendly because I've never had strangers coming to rub my tummy! I do hope they asked for permission? It would be creepy to have people rubbing your tummy out of the blue!
PB,
Sorry nope, Mr bbp can't think of any. Go ask your other thread mummies la. All of us here have plain forgotten!
You must look SUPER friendly because I've never had strangers coming to rub my tummy! I do hope they asked for permission? It would be creepy to have people rubbing your tummy out of the blue!
PB,
Sorry nope, Mr bbp can't think of any. Go ask your other thread mummies la. All of us here have plain forgotten!
michelle
which sch is eboy going to? sounds like fun!
bbp
yes i saw the offer. tinking of checking out night safari...
hee hee, does that mean u plan to go for #2!!??
PB
date din go the way i envisioned. in fact it was a lot of sharing and crying (me of cos) and disappointment. but i hope after this time, we can come out stronger....i hope.
SD
yeah working in china has a lot of temptations! like what u say, so many things we can't control. i think the office is really the most dangerous place and that is also the place that we have no access to!
which sch is eboy going to? sounds like fun!
bbp
yes i saw the offer. tinking of checking out night safari...
hee hee, does that mean u plan to go for #2!!??
PB
date din go the way i envisioned. in fact it was a lot of sharing and crying (me of cos) and disappointment. but i hope after this time, we can come out stronger....i hope.
SD
yeah working in china has a lot of temptations! like what u say, so many things we can't control. i think the office is really the most dangerous place and that is also the place that we have no access to!
bluebearypie
Active Member
SY,
You know.. I was wondering who would be the first person to interpret my sentence that way
I have been getting lotsa questions, especially CNY period. And I seriously doubt I would be having another. #1 was unplanned and the only reason I can think of for a #2 is that I should because single child is a lonely place to be. But how is that fair to #2? Imagine finding out that the only reason your mom had you is to be a partner to your brother.
Date - sounds like it went well. I think sharing is very important. Even though it feels like nothing came out of it, I think it's therapeutic to offload your emotions and at the same time, your hubby knows all is not well with your heart. Stay strong
You know.. I was wondering who would be the first person to interpret my sentence that way
I have been getting lotsa questions, especially CNY period. And I seriously doubt I would be having another. #1 was unplanned and the only reason I can think of for a #2 is that I should because single child is a lonely place to be. But how is that fair to #2? Imagine finding out that the only reason your mom had you is to be a partner to your brother.
Date - sounds like it went well. I think sharing is very important. Even though it feels like nothing came out of it, I think it's therapeutic to offload your emotions and at the same time, your hubby knows all is not well with your heart. Stay strong
gross confession
my dad gave us a 1kg pack of bak kwa just before CNY and as you know, bluebunny doesn't eat meat. and bak kwa isn't exactly the healthiest thing around so i don't give it to poppy. so guess who has eaten half that pack all by herself already? jialat
bbp
perhaps it is my preggie brain... i did not even think of interpreting it that way! wow that zoo/nightsafari/bird park thing sounds cool!
no la, not "the only reason we had you is so your brother has a partner", but more like "we want to be able to love 2 people the same way, the same 2 people who will know us as parents and will continue to love each other and care for each other even after we are long gone"
mich
wow that sounds like a really nice school! swim classes! yay! i am still procrastinating with that one!
ah that's a nice quote. would you mind sms-ing/email/PM-ing/FB-ing me your details (name, age, occupation) to authenticate your quote please?
SY
i agree with BBP, i think your date was a good start. at least you had the opp to pour everything out
my dad gave us a 1kg pack of bak kwa just before CNY and as you know, bluebunny doesn't eat meat. and bak kwa isn't exactly the healthiest thing around so i don't give it to poppy. so guess who has eaten half that pack all by herself already? jialat
bbp
perhaps it is my preggie brain... i did not even think of interpreting it that way! wow that zoo/nightsafari/bird park thing sounds cool!
no la, not "the only reason we had you is so your brother has a partner", but more like "we want to be able to love 2 people the same way, the same 2 people who will know us as parents and will continue to love each other and care for each other even after we are long gone"
mich
wow that sounds like a really nice school! swim classes! yay! i am still procrastinating with that one!
ah that's a nice quote. would you mind sms-ing/email/PM-ing/FB-ing me your details (name, age, occupation) to authenticate your quote please?
SY
i agree with BBP, i think your date was a good start. at least you had the opp to pour everything out
bluebearypie
Active Member
ARGH! Is it another leap year already??? Olympics London 2012 already!!!!??? I just realised when I looked at that 1-for-1 flyer and I saw the validity dates!
ARGH!!! Too fast too fast! Time needs to stop!
ARGH!!! Too fast too fast! Time needs to stop!
michelletan
Active Member
bbp, the coffeeshop aunties loh! ya lah, i do visit to drink kopi often enough but doesnt mean me and her good friend can rub my tummy and comment small loh. then, look like girl leh. then i say, no its boy, she insist is girl. *faint*. I stopped going there ever since.. hahaha.
over CNY i also got a lot of "go for #2" especially my elder brother just had #3 after a 10 yr gap. everyone just assumed if they can do it, so can I. but hey, I'm a one child policy! i just said "Nope" and walk away. they normally stop immediately lah... aiyo, my MIL also join the gang lah.. carry my newborn niece and look at me (not hubby) to say can lah, #2 lah.. i just roll my eyes and walk away also lah...
leap year must celebrate. what plans do you all have?
SY, pouring everything out is good what. have another session if needed, then slowly progress from pouring everything out to taking stock of relationship to planning the future ahead.... be strong!
over CNY i also got a lot of "go for #2" especially my elder brother just had #3 after a 10 yr gap. everyone just assumed if they can do it, so can I. but hey, I'm a one child policy! i just said "Nope" and walk away. they normally stop immediately lah... aiyo, my MIL also join the gang lah.. carry my newborn niece and look at me (not hubby) to say can lah, #2 lah.. i just roll my eyes and walk away also lah...
leap year must celebrate. what plans do you all have?
SY, pouring everything out is good what. have another session if needed, then slowly progress from pouring everything out to taking stock of relationship to planning the future ahead.... be strong!
SY,
Hope your hubby can be more sensitive to your feelings after you pour it out to him. Men are a bit numb though... so it may take a while for him to change. Do you do family things together? Like all 4 of you go to the zoo during weekends? Or go to the beacj, go to the airport? Maybe the family togtherness may jolt him out of the moon and back to earth?
PB, sorry, I also cannot remember if I got pissed at any insensitive remarks.. basically I was a happily pregnant lady..
Cellow,
Like many others, the 2 kids sleep with us. Wuffy's junior single bed, our king sized bed, and mei mei's cot. So it is a squeeze, and a very bad squeeze when both decide to abandon their beds and sleep together with us on our king sized bed. (my hubby and I do not belong to the petite dept)
bbp, yes! i got a shock today that Olympics and world Cup is on this year. Our boys are turning 4 this year! and they will be in K1 next year!! shockers!!!
Hope your hubby can be more sensitive to your feelings after you pour it out to him. Men are a bit numb though... so it may take a while for him to change. Do you do family things together? Like all 4 of you go to the zoo during weekends? Or go to the beacj, go to the airport? Maybe the family togtherness may jolt him out of the moon and back to earth?
PB, sorry, I also cannot remember if I got pissed at any insensitive remarks.. basically I was a happily pregnant lady..
Cellow,
Like many others, the 2 kids sleep with us. Wuffy's junior single bed, our king sized bed, and mei mei's cot. So it is a squeeze, and a very bad squeeze when both decide to abandon their beds and sleep together with us on our king sized bed. (my hubby and I do not belong to the petite dept)
bbp, yes! i got a shock today that Olympics and world Cup is on this year. Our boys are turning 4 this year! and they will be in K1 next year!! shockers!!!
aargh, sleepy sleepy. just ended work call. C1 had a mini meltdown just now when i told him that papa needs to put him to sleep tonight as mama is working.
but when i started my 10pm call, papa was chuckling w C1 so i guess all went well.
oh yes, i did not say it out loud ever to anyone... i was actually afraid for the longest time that C1 was colour blind. he consistently mixed up red and green, and that is a specific type of colour blindness. ystday Mr C was on leave, I was working at home, C1 was off school (Mr C decided in the morning that C1 needed a holiday too since we all touched down at 10 plus pm on Sunday night).... we brought C1 to eat pizza and there was the Italian flag on the wall. i took the chance to ask C1, can you tell mama what are the colours and waited, barely breathing, for his answer. he started to name the colours from right to left.... red... white.... green!!! he knows how to differentiate red and green.
his fan obsession since 8mo persists to this day. it would be quite sad if he cannot do engineering or science due to colour blindness. so.... PHEW PHEW PHEW.
mummies worry abt the darnest things.
i started worrying ever since we passed traffic lights and he mixes up the green/red colours.
this is a HUGE load off my mind.
but when i started my 10pm call, papa was chuckling w C1 so i guess all went well.
oh yes, i did not say it out loud ever to anyone... i was actually afraid for the longest time that C1 was colour blind. he consistently mixed up red and green, and that is a specific type of colour blindness. ystday Mr C was on leave, I was working at home, C1 was off school (Mr C decided in the morning that C1 needed a holiday too since we all touched down at 10 plus pm on Sunday night).... we brought C1 to eat pizza and there was the Italian flag on the wall. i took the chance to ask C1, can you tell mama what are the colours and waited, barely breathing, for his answer. he started to name the colours from right to left.... red... white.... green!!! he knows how to differentiate red and green.
his fan obsession since 8mo persists to this day. it would be quite sad if he cannot do engineering or science due to colour blindness. so.... PHEW PHEW PHEW.
mummies worry abt the darnest things.
i started worrying ever since we passed traffic lights and he mixes up the green/red colours.
this is a HUGE load off my mind.
SY,
the date is a good start.
progress from offloading negative emotions, to doing positive things w him, take stock of 2011 what happened in your relationship and then share hopes and dreams for 2012. (heh, i rehash what mich says but in a more spec manner)
rem to retreat and regroup if the going gets too emotionally tough for you..... be strong! look to JH and JX and most imptly yourself.... rem why you still want to spend your life with this man.
the date is a good start.
progress from offloading negative emotions, to doing positive things w him, take stock of 2011 what happened in your relationship and then share hopes and dreams for 2012. (heh, i rehash what mich says but in a more spec manner)
rem to retreat and regroup if the going gets too emotionally tough for you..... be strong! look to JH and JX and most imptly yourself.... rem why you still want to spend your life with this man.
mummies
a big hug to all the mummies here for being so supportive!
haha i wouldn't exactly call it a good date but i guess on hindsight it is a good chance to get a lot of things off his mind. but i m always speechless whenever he starts offloading cos whatever he says just throws me into shock......
cellow
hee i was also worried about jx last time! but i guess sometimes they also purposely tell us the wrong colors....
i had frens who are color blind but still can do science or engineering..
michelle, bbp
whether u have #2 or not really is up to u right. i think it is just a norm that ALL relatives us when is the next kid coming along. like when u only have 1 kid, they will ask u when is #2 coming. when u have 2 kids, they will also ask u when is #3 coming...it never stops right..haha. prob only stop after u have and then they will say you won't think of #4 right..haha....
a big hug to all the mummies here for being so supportive!
haha i wouldn't exactly call it a good date but i guess on hindsight it is a good chance to get a lot of things off his mind. but i m always speechless whenever he starts offloading cos whatever he says just throws me into shock......
cellow
hee i was also worried about jx last time! but i guess sometimes they also purposely tell us the wrong colors....
i had frens who are color blind but still can do science or engineering..
michelle, bbp
whether u have #2 or not really is up to u right. i think it is just a norm that ALL relatives us when is the next kid coming along. like when u only have 1 kid, they will ask u when is #2 coming. when u have 2 kids, they will also ask u when is #3 coming...it never stops right..haha. prob only stop after u have and then they will say you won't think of #4 right..haha....
sy,
hmmm whenever we have words, Mr C frequently gets the last word in too. i m still working on this thing called marriage and how to argue with my husband constructively. most of the things he says throws me into shock too. mild shock la, macam how can you say such a hurtful thing to me and expect me to still be civil to you, you detestable man. i try to take the higher ground.
get things off HIS mind? i thought you got things off your mind, and he just listened?
work changes
got new grandboss (boss of boss) bcz of reorg. great grand boss still the same. grandboss obviously doesnt know what boss and his team, incldg me, are doing ... so now have to submit monthly status reports!!! on how i spend my time. jialat. how to rem how i spent my time?!? struggling with Jan report. and taking time away from real work.
hmmm whenever we have words, Mr C frequently gets the last word in too. i m still working on this thing called marriage and how to argue with my husband constructively. most of the things he says throws me into shock too. mild shock la, macam how can you say such a hurtful thing to me and expect me to still be civil to you, you detestable man. i try to take the higher ground.
get things off HIS mind? i thought you got things off your mind, and he just listened?
work changes
got new grandboss (boss of boss) bcz of reorg. great grand boss still the same. grandboss obviously doesnt know what boss and his team, incldg me, are doing ... so now have to submit monthly status reports!!! on how i spend my time. jialat. how to rem how i spent my time?!? struggling with Jan report. and taking time away from real work.
cellow
i din get a lot of things off my mind. it always comes out wrong. so i sent him an email on mon after thinking thru. i dunno how much it gets into him. but i guess the big word is PATIENCE....
work changes..that sucks....try to do a record of what u do usually? i do that once in a while so that when appraisal time comes i know what to write....
i din get a lot of things off my mind. it always comes out wrong. so i sent him an email on mon after thinking thru. i dunno how much it gets into him. but i guess the big word is PATIENCE....
work changes..that sucks....try to do a record of what u do usually? i do that once in a while so that when appraisal time comes i know what to write....
Sheesh cellow, a report on what you do with your time? So much for trust and respect for maturity and responsibility eh?
Arguing with husbands: my 2 cents. I think men and women can never argue on the same level. Because men cannot admit they are wrong for some reason (maybe the same reason they can't ask for directions) and they don't like confrontations. At the work place they do well but at home they are threatened by their wives' objectivity and insistence to solve the problem. So they avoid, and when it becomes clear that they can't win, they bring up a totally new and diff topic, one that is completely off topic, one the wife has not had time to prepare for, just to throw a spanner in the mix and to confuse the wife, to postpone the arguement indefinately
Men. Not that they are the enemy, but why can't they be easier to fight with
Arguing with husbands: my 2 cents. I think men and women can never argue on the same level. Because men cannot admit they are wrong for some reason (maybe the same reason they can't ask for directions) and they don't like confrontations. At the work place they do well but at home they are threatened by their wives' objectivity and insistence to solve the problem. So they avoid, and when it becomes clear that they can't win, they bring up a totally new and diff topic, one that is completely off topic, one the wife has not had time to prepare for, just to throw a spanner in the mix and to confuse the wife, to postpone the arguement indefinately
Men. Not that they are the enemy, but why can't they be easier to fight with
smiggleprincess
Active Member
Hello mummies,
New maid came in monday night..
i talked to her till i have sore throat..
she def cannot handle kayden.. haiz...
Pb
i actually don mind being pregnant and having another kid...
but i have to work.. so i rather not since i dont have time...
everyone been asking me to have a third one.. same as Youpi..
and my reply was.. "if its not gurantee a girl, then no.." haha...
Cellow
same same..
they like to get the last words all the time..
from talking about their wrong, it became my wrong..
when he game, he don sleep untill 3/4am..
he don even play with the kids.. must wiat for his addiction to be over lor.. and it may take months!
New maid came in monday night..
i talked to her till i have sore throat..
she def cannot handle kayden.. haiz...
Pb
i actually don mind being pregnant and having another kid...
but i have to work.. so i rather not since i dont have time...
everyone been asking me to have a third one.. same as Youpi..
and my reply was.. "if its not gurantee a girl, then no.." haha...
Cellow
same same..
they like to get the last words all the time..
from talking about their wrong, it became my wrong..
when he game, he don sleep untill 3/4am..
he don even play with the kids.. must wiat for his addiction to be over lor.. and it may take months!
mummies
my boss thinks that i shd not be too nice to my hb. must let him know that i m not happy about things and him. my fren also thinks i give in too much and spoil him. it's like now i m doing a lot of things to make sure things are getting better. but my boss feels that i shd not. coming from a guy ( n becos he says he knows how a guy thinks) he feels that by doing what i m doing, my hb will take me for granted and things will always be my fault when it goes wrong. i know there's some truth in what he says and it is also the case that when i m angry then my hb makes more effort. but right now, is it a good time to not do anything? i dunno leh.....
my boss thinks that i shd not be too nice to my hb. must let him know that i m not happy about things and him. my fren also thinks i give in too much and spoil him. it's like now i m doing a lot of things to make sure things are getting better. but my boss feels that i shd not. coming from a guy ( n becos he says he knows how a guy thinks) he feels that by doing what i m doing, my hb will take me for granted and things will always be my fault when it goes wrong. i know there's some truth in what he says and it is also the case that when i m angry then my hb makes more effort. but right now, is it a good time to not do anything? i dunno leh.....
mummies
my boss thinks that i shd not be too nice to my hb. must let him know that i m not happy about things and him. my fren also thinks i give in too much and spoil him. it's like now i m doing a lot of things to make sure things are getting better. but my boss feels that i shd not. coming from a guy ( n becos he says he knows how a guy thinks) he feels that by doing what i m doing, my hb will take me for granted and things will always be my fault when it goes wrong. i know there's some truth in what he says and it is also the case that when i m angry then my hb makes more effort. but right now, is it a good time to not do anything? i dunno leh.....
my boss thinks that i shd not be too nice to my hb. must let him know that i m not happy about things and him. my fren also thinks i give in too much and spoil him. it's like now i m doing a lot of things to make sure things are getting better. but my boss feels that i shd not. coming from a guy ( n becos he says he knows how a guy thinks) he feels that by doing what i m doing, my hb will take me for granted and things will always be my fault when it goes wrong. i know there's some truth in what he says and it is also the case that when i m angry then my hb makes more effort. but right now, is it a good time to not do anything? i dunno leh.....
PB,
tis actually not my grandboss' request but my boss' request so that HE can account to his new boss. i understand that fully.... and i would do the same if i were in my boss' shoes.... but still.
arguing w HBs
i stay v calm. and remind myself to talk softly. the more impt the topic to me, the more softly i talk... even when he is yelling. i want to stay on topic and not let the argument descend to the level of 'why do you yell at me and disrespect me'. that way, i always win. and take the higher moral ground. hehe.
tis actually not my grandboss' request but my boss' request so that HE can account to his new boss. i understand that fully.... and i would do the same if i were in my boss' shoes.... but still.
arguing w HBs
i stay v calm. and remind myself to talk softly. the more impt the topic to me, the more softly i talk... even when he is yelling. i want to stay on topic and not let the argument descend to the level of 'why do you yell at me and disrespect me'. that way, i always win. and take the higher moral ground. hehe.
SY,
at least you are trying. If you want to repair the relationship, you still have to try. Ignoring it will not wake up your man, rather you put him back where he was. Even if things still dun go the way you wanted to, you have tried. Conscience is clear.
Why don't you organise family outings. If dates dun seem to go well, family dates should do well. break the ice first... get the family thing going. Melt your man's front first, then work on him. Have a nice ECP morning walk this saturday! wet weather program, a nice breakfast at one of the shopping malls with child facilities - like Fidgets or somewhere.
I really hope you get over this real soon. The longer you take to action, the more difficult to get back on track once isolation becomes a way of life.
at least you are trying. If you want to repair the relationship, you still have to try. Ignoring it will not wake up your man, rather you put him back where he was. Even if things still dun go the way you wanted to, you have tried. Conscience is clear.
Why don't you organise family outings. If dates dun seem to go well, family dates should do well. break the ice first... get the family thing going. Melt your man's front first, then work on him. Have a nice ECP morning walk this saturday! wet weather program, a nice breakfast at one of the shopping malls with child facilities - like Fidgets or somewhere.
batgirl
haha my hb hates anything outdoors!!! in fact the mention of outdoors and u can see his face change. once in a while he does go though. but ask him to go botanic gardens, he sian, ask him to go fly kite, he sian....very difficult. and he dun like to wake up early...
i m thinking of where to go this sat. but haven't quite discuss with him yet. initially was thinking of farmer's market after jx's ballet but he not keen.
haha my hb hates anything outdoors!!! in fact the mention of outdoors and u can see his face change. once in a while he does go though. but ask him to go botanic gardens, he sian, ask him to go fly kite, he sian....very difficult. and he dun like to wake up early...
i m thinking of where to go this sat. but haven't quite discuss with him yet. initially was thinking of farmer's market after jx's ballet but he not keen.
1stlittlestar
Active Member
SY not sure if i missed this but i think counselling helps. I have seen friends wanting to divorce but counselling brought them back and they seem to be more loving than before..can try church counselling ... think not so intimidating right..
PB n smuggle are so right abt arguing with hb's!
SY.. To a certain extent, your colleagues are right abt not being stepped all Over, but now u r trying to mend the relationship n hb also has to agree to put in effort.. If he hates the outdoors, do indoor stuff? Go shopping/mOvies/meal/ice skating/ go play arcade games together...anything at all where u guys can relax and laugh.. Really hope things work out for u n yes...try counseling if u can. But both must be willing or it won't work
SY.. To a certain extent, your colleagues are right abt not being stepped all Over, but now u r trying to mend the relationship n hb also has to agree to put in effort.. If he hates the outdoors, do indoor stuff? Go shopping/mOvies/meal/ice skating/ go play arcade games together...anything at all where u guys can relax and laugh.. Really hope things work out for u n yes...try counseling if u can. But both must be willing or it won't work
SY
Staycation just for the two of you? Or with kids but get grandparents to hang around to watch them for a few hours while you and hb have couple spa time. We just did a family one at changi last weekend, and had a great time. Would recommend that, only it's all outdoor stuff: changi boardwalk, chek jawa, changi beach, war museum and chapel. And there's lots of good food around there too.
Smiggle
Can try, can try, hehe. My hb's cousin is expecting a girl after two boys. I would love another two, and would if I was younger!
Staycation just for the two of you? Or with kids but get grandparents to hang around to watch them for a few hours while you and hb have couple spa time. We just did a family one at changi last weekend, and had a great time. Would recommend that, only it's all outdoor stuff: changi boardwalk, chek jawa, changi beach, war museum and chapel. And there's lots of good food around there too.
Smiggle
Can try, can try, hehe. My hb's cousin is expecting a girl after two boys. I would love another two, and would if I was younger!
Youpi
I am so eyeing that changi hotel for staycation too!! Sounds like you had a great time. Expensive?
Family friendly hotels
Hey mummies does anyone have a recommendation for family friendly hotels in SG? We've got 3 visitors in June/July and would love to do mini staycation at a hotel with a fun pool! I know shangri-la has but I think my pocket no likey the prices!
Did someone say they've stayed at RWS hard rock? Did someone mention it was fun? Was it good?
I am so eyeing that changi hotel for staycation too!! Sounds like you had a great time. Expensive?
Family friendly hotels
Hey mummies does anyone have a recommendation for family friendly hotels in SG? We've got 3 visitors in June/July and would love to do mini staycation at a hotel with a fun pool! I know shangri-la has but I think my pocket no likey the prices!
Did someone say they've stayed at RWS hard rock? Did someone mention it was fun? Was it good?
Jo
plays are out for him. not interested...
trying to do a night safari outing but that got to KIV until 2 weeks later cos he not free these 2 Fris...
Youpi
i always wanted to go changi village hotel! i think it looks great. and not too ex right?
PB
i stayed at festive but i think the reviews i heard is that Hard rock is better. the pool is also more fun....
Mummies
we are going for our first session next week but then he just told me that he has meeting after that and needs to rush back. am i unreasonable to feel unhappy over it? sometimes i wonder m i having too high expecations but i cannot be having no expectations right? he needs to know i have certain expectations and that if there are not met, i will feel unhappy.
sometimes when i tell him things like i wish he will do certain things and he always rebutt with he has been like that for the past few years. but that doesn't mean that he can be like that going forward right. if he thinks i need to work on certain things, i also think he needs to work on certain things.
so tired....
plays are out for him. not interested...
trying to do a night safari outing but that got to KIV until 2 weeks later cos he not free these 2 Fris...
Youpi
i always wanted to go changi village hotel! i think it looks great. and not too ex right?
PB
i stayed at festive but i think the reviews i heard is that Hard rock is better. the pool is also more fun....
Mummies
we are going for our first session next week but then he just told me that he has meeting after that and needs to rush back. am i unreasonable to feel unhappy over it? sometimes i wonder m i having too high expecations but i cannot be having no expectations right? he needs to know i have certain expectations and that if there are not met, i will feel unhappy.
sometimes when i tell him things like i wish he will do certain things and he always rebutt with he has been like that for the past few years. but that doesn't mean that he can be like that going forward right. if he thinks i need to work on certain things, i also think he needs to work on certain things.
so tired....
busy until.....!
SY,
HUGS. you listen to his explanation on what meeting he has after that, then you ask him to think abt whether his family or his work is more impt. and walk away! aft you throw that qn to him.
dun open yourself up to listen to his useless self justifications. angry for you.
"sometimes when i tell him things like i wish he will do certain things and he always rebutt with he has been like that for the past few years. but that doesn't mean that he can be like that going forward right." in corporate speak, past perf is no indication of future perf. and to lighten the mood, last time policemen also wear shorts!
i posted a video on marriage ystday (i think) to FB. go post it to his wall!
SY,
HUGS. you listen to his explanation on what meeting he has after that, then you ask him to think abt whether his family or his work is more impt. and walk away! aft you throw that qn to him.
dun open yourself up to listen to his useless self justifications. angry for you.
"sometimes when i tell him things like i wish he will do certain things and he always rebutt with he has been like that for the past few years. but that doesn't mean that he can be like that going forward right." in corporate speak, past perf is no indication of future perf. and to lighten the mood, last time policemen also wear shorts!
i posted a video on marriage ystday (i think) to FB. go post it to his wall!
PB, SY
There was a promotion that hb found, which included a extra bed, breakfasts for 2A + 2C (under 12), Wi-fi, newspapers, etc. Guests get complimentary parking too. I don't know if it's still on, can check the website.
SY
The Italian restaurant on the 8th level is supposed to good. The 8L spa is being renovated so only the 1L one is available for use. Wait till the 8L one is done then have a couple treatment with hb, and dinner at the Italian restaurant after that. Book a table overlooking the sea and enjoy each other's company...
Is hb worried about work or very stressed? Even if he cannot miss the meeting, get him to promise that you will both take time out after that to discuss and work through whatever the counsellor recommends. Set a date and time, and tell him that this meeting is just as important as the one for work. It involves his family!
Exploring the area with kids: it's great because the boardwalks are so easy. L could do it all on his own, even the Chek Jawa one. And the boys loved taking the bumboat there etc. I am in the midst of - very slowly and not published yet - posting pictures on our blog for the grandparents to see...
Cellow
LOL on policemen wearing shorts last time!
Btw, those in Cairns still do, heheh!
There was a promotion that hb found, which included a extra bed, breakfasts for 2A + 2C (under 12), Wi-fi, newspapers, etc. Guests get complimentary parking too. I don't know if it's still on, can check the website.
SY
The Italian restaurant on the 8th level is supposed to good. The 8L spa is being renovated so only the 1L one is available for use. Wait till the 8L one is done then have a couple treatment with hb, and dinner at the Italian restaurant after that. Book a table overlooking the sea and enjoy each other's company...
Is hb worried about work or very stressed? Even if he cannot miss the meeting, get him to promise that you will both take time out after that to discuss and work through whatever the counsellor recommends. Set a date and time, and tell him that this meeting is just as important as the one for work. It involves his family!
Exploring the area with kids: it's great because the boardwalks are so easy. L could do it all on his own, even the Chek Jawa one. And the boys loved taking the bumboat there etc. I am in the midst of - very slowly and not published yet - posting pictures on our blog for the grandparents to see...
Cellow
LOL on policemen wearing shorts last time!
have never drank as much coffee as this sleepy week. maybe this is really true.
http://crappypictures.typepad.com/crappy-pictures/2012/01/the-uppers-downers-of-parenting-or-coffee-wine.html
i know. i posted this before. budden. i will post it again every time i am inclined to hug my bolster rather than my work computer, which is very often these days
just waiting for the day i down one alcohol shot each night to sleep. then i will REALLY become the mum in that blog post. tee hee hee.
*hic*
youpi,
you crack me up la with that comment on Cairns, you do. hehe!
http://crappypictures.typepad.com/crappy-pictures/2012/01/the-uppers-downers-of-parenting-or-coffee-wine.html
i know. i posted this before. budden. i will post it again every time i am inclined to hug my bolster rather than my work computer, which is very often these days
just waiting for the day i down one alcohol shot each night to sleep. then i will REALLY become the mum in that blog post. tee hee hee.
*hic*
youpi,
you crack me up la with that comment on Cairns, you do. hehe!
