(2008/07) July 2008

Qing,
live for yourself, NOT for your family, friends, relatives etc.
how may we know if our doings are acceptable by others, do we constently live and be be led by people?

Go with your heart!
if you strongly stand by your faith to keep the baby, as times passes, your parents would understand you are ready, your bf is ready, and might marvel and feel proud they have a daughter whose so sensible, so responsible.

things do not necessary turn out the way we want, like my case, but we have to live by it, and adapt, adjust to it.

we grow from circumstances,not by circumstances. hope you understand this quote.

you need to know what you want. from your post, feel you are lost, you want to eat both pie, keep the baby and still maintain a nice and harmonious relationship with all your relatives.
this might not sound possible here as you are not legally married, so forget about this.

weigh through your losses, real losses as if you've lost the bb like me, the agony you will feel, vs over losing your relatives, family support etc..which is more important and i guess you will know where to go from here.

i might sound harsh, but please understand countless people out there yearns for a bb, but they cant, the pain they go through is beyong our imagination.
 


i just posted this in the Aug 08 thread cos my EDD just changed fr jul to aug. since there is more mtb here, hopefully i get some advise here? thank you.

"hi gals,

i just saw gynae for the 2nd time & heard the heartbeat... so excited when i heard the heartbeat so loud & clear... EDD 1 Aug 08... 6 weeks 6 days preggie... my gynae say baby is growing well & asked me to see her in 4 weeks time... so long hor??

duno due to my short memory or what, when i came home & compare my scan 14 days ago, the 1st scan stated 5weeks 4 days... is it strange that the EDD get pushed backwards... how come baby did not grow by the full 2 weeks?

any experienced mtb please advise... thanks in advance.."
 
Ceraine,

am glad u are so brave! I hope u get urself adjusted and u will be happy to see ur AF reporting like me then after losing my baby cos this means the body is back to normal and i can ttc soon. This is definitely a blessing in disguise. U will have a healthy one next. Drink DOM and chicken essence to build up ur health. Wishing u a speedy recovery!

Btw, Dr cheng whom u referred to is it Dr Henry Cheng?
 
Qing
Wat ever decision u have made we know its very hard for u to make. Jus stick to your decision if u think its correct. Dun let other's opinions n views affect u. U live for ur own dun bother about wat other ppl say about u.
Since u are willing to ask ppl for their opinions n think about them I'm sure watever decision u have made is the best 1 there is.
If u are worried u will regret if u abort then don't. Jus make sure ur bf knows wat to expect n that he will stick by you no matter wat. Ur family will definately xing ruan when they know ur decision to keep baby is strong if they are so close to u.

Jmon
Lunch I on 1 cos I sahm ma.....hehehe

btw anyone has Spring maternity card got discount anot?? Cos I aim a linen shorts there very ex leh nearly $60.

Karen
Sorry to hear ur news but take good care of urself.

Ceraine
Be brave okie. Having been pregnant means ur fertile so build up ur health n try again.
 
hi peppermint,
i was welling away just now again,esp now its not fully flushed out.i guess on the day i see red, i will be heartbroken over the loss.
constantly reminding myself..the loss is a blessing, dont let bb suffer later part in life.
had a chat with hubby, though he sounded okie, i know deep down he is still grieving over the loss, but we've promised to keep our body fit and try again.

may i know when u start ure mini confinement. as mine not fully flushed out yet (expected two weeks for hcg to dip to zero and i'll lose it), do i then confinement now or two weeks later?

dor dor,
thanks.i will ..
 
ceraine
I'm sorry about your loss. But you've been very brave and have even come to terms with it. Yes, pls rest well, build up your health and try again... all the best to you.

dongle
EDD is just that - estimated! How EDD is calculated is by scanning the size of the foetus. In fact it can still change up till you go for your detailed scan at around 20 weeks (if I remember correctly). Then, the date given is probably more accurate.

Dr Han
Oh yes, realised that quite a no. of us are seeing him! He was recommended to me by a fren and subsequently, realised quite a number of other frens and colleagues' wives also go to him... pretty popular but means a long wait! Are you girls seeing him at the Pte Suite or Specialist Clinic? Me at Pte Suite and realised that his consultation fees have gone up liao when I went for my 1st visit last Sat! Boo hoo... pocket big hole man!

Someone asking abt Dr Han right? Maybe you wanna make an appointment to see him at the Specialist Clinic as it'll be cheaper. Then see if you're comfortable with him. As he'll be your gynae, the most impt thing is that you'll have to be comfortable with him. I like him as he doesn't brush away any concerns that you have and will take time to explain. Agree with the rest that the waiting time can be long but yet you only see him for 5 - 10min... but it also means that there are no major concerns!
happy.gif
 
Ceraine,

my case is different from urs. I had an induced labour and actually gave birth to the baby so I had a one mth confinement. U wanna check out the forum on miscarriage and check with the pple who may have the same situation as u? Am Sorry i cant help on this.

To cope with ur grieve i suggest u borrow books on coping with loss from the library. I did that and it helps. Guys usually wont show much emotionally as they feel that they have to be strong for us. But deep down inside they feel as bad as we do.

Be strong ceraine. Give urself time to grieve and i understand the strong feeling of wanting to try again.
 
Hi Ceraine,

Sorry to hear your loss. Reminds me of the my past pains as well... I had 2 previous miscarriages. First time there was no hearbeat, so it wasnt that painful. Second time, lost it at almost 8 weeks. Saw fetel heartbeat liao. Wah, the pain then was excruciating.

Take it easy. I know it is easier said than done but there is nothing much you can do now. Try to build up your health again, maybe you can see TCM? Can TTC after 3mths again.

Stay strong and healthy!
 
ceraine
so sorry to hear abt it but good to hear that your spirits are still up and u r accepting it. u r right in saying that it is better to happen early then late.

do rest well and try again and update us okie?

qing
hmm, sounds like u r under a lot of stress right now. try not to think too much. it seems to me that u really want to keep the bb very much. i m sure even if u choose to keep the bb, your parents will accept it eventually. whatever decision u make, it must be what u wan. we will be here for u.

SNL
i see him at Pte suite. yeah the fees have increased since the last time i saw him abt 2 years ago!!

bookfest
any mummies interested to go?
 
ceraine,
you are very brave~! wishing you a speedy recovery and could not wait to hear your good news in future.

dor dor,
i dont have spring maternity discount card. i try to ask my fren has or not. so are you going to bring your elder kid to the gathering?
 
ceraine.. can see you are a sensible and strong individual *big bear hug for you*

it's good that you are thinking positive...dun worry all will be well soon and I'm sure we'll hear good news from you again in time to come!
 
Jean,
where and what time you wanna meet for lunch?



<font color="0000ff">Lunch cum shopping gathering</font>

date: 26 Dec
Venue: Suntec?
Time: 1pm?

1. Jean
2. Jmon



interested mummies, please add on.
 
hi ceraine,

take care n rest well okie ..hmmm u v brave ....
happy.gif


hi qing,

hmm y ur parents suddenly dun wan the bb ??? thot they are okie with it de.... did u sit down n try to haf a good heart to heart talk with em ??? hmm abort = end relationship.. i mean ur bf cant do this .... u dun wan it to happen also ....But in ur heart, act u haf a decision le mah ???
 
ling,

i have not seen dr heng for this pregnancy. I went to see Dr Lam (reccomended by mummy Sheila)last week and plan to see him again next week to listen to the heartbeat. I will only see dr heng on Jan 23 and by the time i'll be into my 12 wks. I was hoping that dr heng can allow me to start the package on jan 23....save $$ loh.

the blood test will test for HIV, hep B, glucose, white blood count, etc.....like normal blood test - think this is compulsary. i like to go for the FA scan at wk 20. it's a 30mins scan for all the bb's organ to make sure that they are developing normally. they can also check for down syndrome and clef pallet. i saw my baby yawning the last time haha some may even see the bb's sucking the thumb...so amazing!

ceraine,

i'm impressed by ur braveness....i pray that u'll be blessed again soon. rest more to build up ur health.
 
hi ceraine

i applaud for your braveness , and the way you face the whole thing. Hope you are mentally and emotional well soon. Take care !

hi Qing

I have a feeling that you still want your baby. If you do, pls do not kill it. Try to convince yourself u can do it. You have to grow up and stop relying on ppl around you. You shld know ppl around you WILL NOT always be there for you.

Pls consider carefully ...
 
Hi Sy,
I am staying at tampines. =)

Any one here whose gynae is also Cynthia Kew from KKH? Anyone has any comments on this pretty n young gynae ?
 
SNL
I see Dr Han at TPS. I dun like seeing him in clinic B as there is no scanning machine there.

MeiH
I saw Dr cynthia Kew at kkh 24hrs clinic just a mth ago as i got some spotting as my gynae is out of town. I think she is very young and not very experience leh.... I kenna poke 2X for the blood test as she fail the first time. My arms kenna blueblack.
 
SNL,
thanks for your advice, im more assured mow... earlier was just a little worried that my bb is not growing by the full 2 weeks & that my next appointment is 4 weeks later...
 
I haven't seen any gynae yet ler. When to go?
I scared too early kena scolded.

I'm staying in TPY, should be early July. Hope to be on the 6. First time mum, so very sotong.
 
Hi mummies,

before i make any decision.
i would like to know about the cost of having a baby. i know some of you here are already a mommy. and i am pretty concern about the cost of having a baby.

how much does it cost to give birth?
hospital fee.
monthly milk money
diaper money
nanny / maid
maternity wear
childcare
any other fee.

i just want to be realistic.
i want to ensure if i realy do want to keep this baby, i want to have enough money to support and not to depend on anyone.
 
rain,
u wont be kena scolding by gynae. 1st time mummy mah. u just call to book appt and tell the nurse tat u suspect u r preggy and want to confirm that lor. this is wat i always told the nurse :p
 
hi rain,

me staying at tpy too .... ooo its never too early to see gynae, but they will tell u that they cant scan much ... onli the sac.. i went to see gyane when me juz 5 weeks ...

hi qing,

hmmmm u haf to see where u wanna give birth n the hospital that u wan ??? ur gyane package/etc ...
 
Hi Qing,
This is what i paid for:

Delivery Fee (cash payment after medisave, exclude pre&post natal check up) = about $2k+
Breastmilk = Free (but must make sure bb latch or invest in good pump.)
Formula milk = depends on brand, $30+/- per 900gm, which last 4-6days depending on your bb's appetite
diaper = about $100 per mth
maid = indonesia maid about $490 (exclude her food), initial payment $2000+/-
nanny = $500 to $800 per mth (depends whether bb got stay over night)
maternity wear = depends on where u buy, can range from $20 to $100+ per pc
confinement nanny = $1800 per mth
confinement food = $400+/- one confinement mth
infant care = about $800 per mth
childcare = about $600 per mth
increase in utilities bill = $100 per mth
cereal/food (esp fish is ex) per mth = $100 per mth
vaccine (if taken at PD) = $450+/- per package
vaccine (if taken at polyclinic) = FOC
medical bills (if see PD) = $50 per visit
medical bills (if see GP) = $40 per visit
toys/clothes (optional) = $50 to $100 per mth depends on what you want to give ur bb
start up cost for having bb, eg, bottles, steriliser, bb washing powder, bb bottle wash, mitten, botties etc etc = about $400

Hmm... anymore????
 
wow the cost all add up like alot leh ... i also havent perpare for it .... somemore i still thinking wan to employ confinement nanny anot...

btw what they do for us beside cooking?
 
Qing,

the followings are just estimates. diff hosp charge differently.

hospital + delivery @KKH (i stayed 3 days 2 nite)= $5k (inclusive of medisave deduction of $2k)

milk powder:
Breast milk is FREE, but be prepared to spend on pumps.

my boy's drinking S26 Gold for 1st 6mth, each tin $32 (now), 1 wk 1 tin, total for a mth = $128 (4weeks). for whole 6mths = $768

now he's drinking Promil gold stage 2 (up to 1 year old) which is $29/tin, also 1 wk 1 tin, so 1mth = $116 (4wks). whole of 6mths = $696

some times i bot my milk powder at JB, it's cheaper.

diaper:
i didnt use good diaper on him. i use NTUC house brand which is cheaper, and Pet Pet. price wise, depends on sizes. diff sizes diff price. some times NTUC has promotions. last mth i bot 2packs of NTUC house brand @ $19 and Pet Pet 3packs @ $36.

maid = $470 per mth inclusive of levy. but hb paid $2200 + $600 at the beginning for the maid's loan and agent's admin fees.

nanny = mother in law's helping me but i did not give extra as i hv given her $600 mthly allowance on top of tat hiring a maid for her.

maternity wear = i did not buy alot. i can wear normal clothes up to my full terms. also, i have pass downs from sister in law. u can go to the 'Want to Give' threads, some times pple give away maternity clothes.

childcare = range from $600 - $900 per mth. i m not sure abt the rate, maybe other mummies could advise.

as for vaccine, i use baby bonus to pay. so far all the costs can be cover using baby bonus.

after my boy's born, me and hb set aside $100-150 each for diapers/milk powders.

i paid for the things tat i ate during confinement:
herbs = $400
allowance to in laws = $1000 cos they helped me.

as for other things like bottles, sterilizer, bb clothes, etc, u can buy them slowly. i went JB to buy plus i have lots of pass downs from sis in laws. some times there are warehouse sales which u can have good deals on the items.
 
rain
gynae won't scold u for seeing too early. for my first pregnancy, i went at 4 weeks! very early right. just get the medicine and peace of mind lor
for my second one, i went at 6 weeks

qing
how much it cost really depends on u. for diapers, the cost will get lesser as they grow up cos u can switch to the cheaper brands and they use less diapers too. i only used the really good brands for like 6 months then i switch.

for maid, the initial payment partly comes from maid's salary for mine. i paid only a few hundred bucks cos mine was a transfer maid.

u dun have to spend all these money at one shot. so it is actually not that scary. but it is definitely an increase per month. me and hb set aside about extra $150 for bb each month. (this is excluding things like doc visits etc)
 
Qing... financially, no matter how hard, can still survive. at most dun buy new clothes lor :p
But hor.. i have a colleague, her brother in divorcing procedure... then both the father n mother dun want the kids (2kids age 2 & 4 yrs old only)!
so now, the 2 kids left in children's home..
sad.gif

its sad, cos its the kids who got hurt...
so if u decide to keep, pls pls pls, keep him/her till they grow old
happy.gif
dun leave him/her in some home ok?
 
qing,
dont be frighten off with all the figures. like wat Manuka said, the most spend wat u have. if have extra then buy a few more new items for baby lor.

until now, i have not bot any toys for my boy and the clothes i bot for him is, hmm, less than 10pcs and he's now 8 mth old nw, can u believe it? not becos of financial issues, but i think spending so much on them, they are too young to appreciate it lor.

i m waiting for my hb's family to buy him xmas presents hahahaha
 
actually, when i had first one, i buy tons of toys for him... then some toys he dunno how to play.. kekeke , when he grow up, now 2yrs old, he likes to play with non-toys, eg, spoons, bowls, etc... in fact, he likes colouring, which is not ex! kekeke :p
 
I did check and confirm preggy in GP. Will visit them again and they will recommend depending on which hospital I choose....

So I'm thinking KKH.
 
i also have toys for boy to play (also 2nd hands one) but he does nt know how to play. wat he does is throwing them at me... hahaha, so better dont buy him toy :p
 
Qing,
figures are figures, who knows you might have nice colleagues are friends who are willing to pass on sterilizers, prams etc.

else you can visit Want to Sell or Want to Buy for second hand stuff.
don't feel your bb is getting less. when your financial stabilizes, you can then afford better for bb.

somce second hand stuffs come in pretty good condition.

are you big size in nature? i bought four maternity wears and since i do not need now, have intention to re-sell it off.
but if you are keen, i am willing to let it go for free.

things will work out slowly, you have to be strong and keep your faith going okie.
 
manuka,
really they both dun wan tohe kids??? selfish parent.. how can the mother dun wan her kids?? cos carry the bb for nine mth somemore growing in her tummy...

Qing,
actually i dun wish to mention this to anyone again but i hope u can keep yr bb so i tel u ... this is my own story.... this is my 1st bb but before that i had abortion before and till now me and hubby feel so guilty about it..when u abort it that mean everything will be gone if u one day wan to make up for what u hv done to the abort bb you can never do anyhting to make up to him or her...what gone is gone...and after i married till now is 2 1/2 yr we r trying for bb for so long dun hv that mean dun hv until i oct then i found out i got bb so me and hubby happy but at the same time we also feel bad for what we had done last time... so i think u better plan what u wan cos if u really abort it that mean no return road for the bb liao ....
 
ling / MeiH,

me in Tampines too......

Nienie,

ling & myself r also seeing dr.heng delivering at East Shore. Is this ur 1st pregnancy? I'm seeing at Specialist Centre at Bedok Interchange. wut about u?

JMON,

Wow y is ur hospital & delivery bill so expensive? u had c-sec? Mine normal delivery and i think I only paid cash around 1K+ and the rest thru medisave ard 2K.

Qing,

It's actually not that scary as u would expect. To save on milk powder, u can try ur best to breastfeed for as long as u can and if ur mum or pil can help take care of the bb, then u can save on maid / bbsitter. The rest can get some hands-me-down clothes from friends. I dun see any problem if both of u r working parents. I'm glad that u r considering of keeping the bb now.....pls pls stay strong with wut u think is right k? u live ur own life and dun let others influence u....rmb u still have us to support!
 
shay,
my gynae is the dept head in KKH so i think her fees more ex lor plus i used 2 doses of the Epidural drugs leh which already costs $1k. some more i have a package of $620 at KKH frm week 16 onwards and only paid after the delivery.

i paid cash deposit of $1.4k, medisave $2k plus other things, so rounded up to $5k lor
 

i also delivered at KKH (TPS) for both and i find their charges not cheap leh.. but so far, i am very pleased with their service, esp their midwives and nurses, althou people say KK service no good. :p
For first one, my labour was 25hrs, plus epidural and assisted, so total cash payout for delivery itself is $3k, plus gynea visit and those test, about $2k, so total also abt $5k cash...

second one cheaper, cos shorter labour (4hrs) and i 'check out' early.. less than 24hrs...
happy.gif
so paid abt $2k cash only...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

S
Frozen Breast milk to bless dated July~August 2025
Replies
1
Views
315
liangzhusg
liangzhusg
D
Crinone gel for sale
Replies
2
Views
1K
Dimplez
D
C
Leftover unused IVF meds - Cyclogest / Progynova, Duphaston
Replies
3
Views
300
sunflowerzz
S
D
Returning red eggs
Replies
0
Views
720
Ddley
D
Z
C section gynae in nuh
Replies
1
Views
124
michelle_wu
M

Back
Top