(2008/01) Jan 2008 MTBs

violetice: i can understand ur situation, in law not easily to handle... i cried on e 2nd day of my wedding all thks to my mil. my hb agreed wif watever his parents said but i'm always e bad guy who always disagreed and straight-forward.

can u imagine my mil told us to give my sil same amt of $$ ang bao as them to her? crazy right? how can ang bao $$ for sister be e same as parents?
 


morn mummies,
i back in action
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lynn,
y ur mil wan it that way?
 
blessedbaby,
The night flights are usually full hor?? I intent to take the early morning 7am flight...hoping it would be less crowded cos most people dun wan to waste the day travelling?? I hope my theory is right. I can imagine my own "stoned face" if I take the night flight cos I can't sleep well on flights and if baby gets cranky then it will be hell for me. Think I will also try to avoid the bulkhead seats since likely to have other babies there who's crying might trigger off my boy as well...

Steph,
My boy also drool non-stop...like a waterfall!! There are always puddles of saliva on my floor. Sadly, PD said it's not likely to stop anytime soon since there are more teeth coming out. We "ren ming" bah, continue washing the bibs.
 
violetlce, your mil slam the phone down, she must be very angry man. But reunion dinner supposedly to be a joyous event, now ma chiam like enermy. Even if you put Ian far far away also no use right, since its the doggie?
 
Yvonne,

I tried the morning and night flight to Sydney before. I found that morning flight is less tiring, independent of how full is the flight, but because of the length of flight and time difference. When we took the night flight, we arrived at Sydney, like so zoombie, can't do anything but sleep. But when we took the morning flight, we still make use of what remains for the day. Solely based on my personal experience.
 
Kam,
That's exactly how I feel. Plus most hotels won't allow you to check-in so early but already so tired and with a baby somemore...better play safe and take the day flight. Gotta sacrifice 1 day also no choice...better than arriving early but all so grouchy...haha.
 
violet
well, if your husband says don't go, then just stick by his decision lor. After all he is her son and he will know her better than u know her? During their reunion dinner, they will feel awkward that your family isn't there, esp Ian so cute. Sure the other relatives (extended family?)will start asking.. so they hv to answer & those who know how to think will consider who is being unreasonable..

in the meantime the 3 of u can go back to your own mum's place for reunion dinner, wah shiok!
 
Kam,
Saw your comment on OZ...really so negative about it huh? Hehe...so far you're the 1st person I know who doesn't like it there. Most of my friends who studied there wanted to stay and work there but parents want them to come back. But they're in other parts of oz lah, Melbourne and Brisbane.
 
VioletIce,
aiyo, in-laws problems...sigh. If can compromise then try to close one eye but if really being unreasonable then don't go! But there will be consequences lor...really want to severe all ties meh? It's a happy occasion afterall, see if your hubby can talk to her...tell her you know how much she loves her dog just like how much she loves Ian. She wouldn't want to see Ian falling sick during CNY right? *touchwood*...see whether she will budge.
 
Kitsune,
U get preggy after the course la..Then its full maternity leave while serving the bond..Like that, bond end very fast one..
 
<font color="0000ff">mylvera,</font>

Webcam? Haha! I don’t think my PIL will even think about it.

<font color="0000ff">Kam,</font>

Face to face? I think it will be even worse. I don’t understand their family. I guessed they are so tight lipped and stubborn, they are not open to communication and discussion. It’s very autocratic. Geez. “Hail Hitler!”

<font color="0000ff">Lynn,</font>

Wow, your Mil also not easy ar. Goodness. Sometimes I truly don’t understand why they are these way. I wonder if we become MIL next time, will we be this ridiculous? Maybe it’s ageing hormones?

<font color="0000ff">Angelsky,</font>

Actually, we already give in to her. We asked if she can placed the dog in a room so that it will not be THAT near but PD said before, as long as in same house, it’s the same. But just for a bit of precaution lah. Mil also refused. Like I said, not open to compromise.

<font color="0000ff">wendyg,</font>

LOL@Wendyg, you are truly super witty and humorous! I also rather go back to my mum’s place with my granny, several uncles and aunts, several cousins, several nieces and nephews. More than 30++ over at least to have reunion dinner together is so much fun! But I think it will still be necessary to go to in law’s place lah, or else, I think they’ll banned us from entering their place on “Chu Yi.”

<font color="0000ff">Yvonne,</font>

Hubby asked her before "Is your dog more important or your grandson?" She didn't answered him. Hubby super pissed!
 
violet
ya, i also thinking why she prefer her dog to her grandson. Her dog that she sees everyday, eat &amp; sleep with it.. vs her cute Ian grandson that she sees once a week at most?!

If she dun treasure family relationships, my say is... leave her alone lor. Wait until the dog die then re-establish relations. Others who are keen to see Ian (eg FIL) maybe u arrange makan @ restaurant once a month or smthg.

Why must go back on 1st day if the dog still there?! Isn't it the same.. eve, 1st/ 2nd/ 3rd/ 100th day... as long as the dog is there, it's a risk for Ian.
 
<font color="0000ff">wendyg,</font>

Exactly. Fil not so rigid, will also be concerned with Ian's health. Sighz, coz Hubby say how not to "yi si yi si" go briefly. Wait at door lor at most coz his mum would want to go her bro's place after we reached there.
 
Kam
Hahahaha. Go for 3 lah! kekekeke.

About the flight, i also used to think like u do, take the flight so can still have time to spend in the country aft arriving, but sadly, now with baby cannot think like that anymore. Must plan the flight that can coincide with her nap time so she can have nap on the flight.

Lynn
Congrats! Yah, kids are like that one, they will imitate esp other kids. There was one time i took Rylee out to the playground in the evening, dunno why she refuse to go into the stroller. But i managed to put her in and pushed her there. She played there awhile and when it was time to go back, there was this 3 yr old Jap girl running around. When it's time for the kids to go home, she happily ran to her stroller, jumped onto the seat and let the mommy strapped her in. I quickly took the opportunity to point out to Rylee and say "look, jie jie so guai, played already sit back in stroller." She watched the girl intensely...then like nod nod the head, then when i strapped her in, she let me!!! Dunno fluke or not, but it works lo!
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Btw, ur MIL even more "sud" can dictate how much ang pow u all are to give? Wah piang, u ask her "u think i print money ah?" Me too hates that my in-laws always try to use hubby as "money-shaking tree". Come HK wants to stay at Disneyland hotel for 2nights when we stay so near Disneyland, send them for Macau trip for 2 nights, they want to extend 4nights. Come HK say want to spend time with their only grandchild but spent 10mins with Rylee and poof, gone liao. Didnt lift one finger to help out with Rylee's daily stuffs. We will try to accommodate if we can, but if cannot we just say no.

Violetice
my heart goes out to u. That day my in-laws came to visit us in HK and my FIL is the one with all the nonsense. Can try to feed my gal seafood (not fish hor!). I thank my lucky stars we're not staying with them and they're not the ones looking aft my baby!!! Lots of other horror stories about them. But well, for your case, since it's reunion dinner, altho ur hubby also angry, why dont u try to be the "good person". I feel that he will appreciate it if u do. When i quarrel with my mom, i'd appreciate my hubby dont fan the fire when i complained to him and he'd try to bridge the gap. So, tell him, altho u're unhappy with his mom for doing this, let's give n take lo. Bring Ian to the house for reunion but make sure he steer clear of the doggie? Like carry him away from dog, keep him at a certain height? Or give him a mask? Quickly eat and leave lo.

drooling vs talking
aiyah, i also dunno how true the article is. My mom told me only. Whatever it is, if she talks, she talks lo. I can only keep talking to her and hopefully one day she'll surprises me by answering. Hehe. That will be the highlight of the year. I think i look forward more to her talking than walking.
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VioletIce,
The dog doesn't get brochitis by staying inside the room right?? If she choose to be unresonable then fine...go back to your mum's place. Sorry, I also have no patience dealing with unreasonable people, no point wasting time and breath talking sense into them. If she cannot weigh the consequences herself (dog vs grandson) then leave her alone for a while.
 
haiz... all MILs same lah
can i oso vent my anger abt my MIL? haha

I am hakka, my hb teochew. Certain food names i am more familar in hakka language so i tend to say them in hakka. there's once i told my #1 abt the food in hakka language.. my MIL pissed off n told my 2.5yr old son this "u r teochew. u shd know wat this food is called in teochew n not other languages" waseh ... i kept my cool.. i nearly told her off with these sentences.. "#1's parent is teochew n hakka. so Y ARE U TALKING TO HIM IN CANTO (she is canto)???"
 
Violetice
Your MIL is really too much! Really angry &amp; pity you. Why not you, your hubby &amp; Ian put on mask &amp; purposely go back to visit her, haha?? But come to think, is CNY!! Happy occassion, shld not argue with them. Think ask your hubby to call her &amp; have a good talk again. After all, he is still her son. Wonder your MIL will be very upset too if you all never visit her? How many siblings your hubby side got? Is it your MIL got too many children liao.

Mummy with #1/#2, frankly speaking, did you all show favouritism among your kids? I wonder i can treat both of them fairly next time or not too??

Re: Frog leg porridge
Any mummy know how to cook this?? Heard is good for our baby esp they are learning to walk, helps to strengthen their leg muscle. My mum so funny, put the frog leg &amp; boil with the porridge. Shld we mince the meat of frog leg first then boil with the porridge?
 
violet
i hv an idea.. husband go alone to your MIL's reunion dinner, u bring Ian to your own mom/ grandma reunion. That's what i did last year, coz technically i was still in confinement during CNY eve, so my ILs deem i'm still "dirty", so husband brought #1 there for eve and 1st day. He dropped me and baby off at my grandma's so that i can hv steamboat with my extended family, who didn't bother abt my last few days of confinement.. i ate rubbish and everyone was admiring baby.
 
wendyg,
Idea leh...can try.

VioletIce,
You're right, one fine day we'll all become MILs!!! Hopefully we can be nice and reasonable but what if our DILs are the ones who are unreasonale??? Die lah...that's why give birth to son no use...hahaha!
 
<font color="0000ff">mylife,</font>

You’re right. When Hubby said not to go since she told us not to turn up but I reminded him, this is just words in anger. I believe she will be even angrier if we don’t even turned up. Sometimes, it’s funny hor. We, as daughters in law try to mend the bridge but I’m sure the MILs will think we’re the witches! Really envy those with good MILs.

<font color="0000ff">Yvonne,</font>

Yeah, she really loves the dog very much. I can understand too, being she has the dog for over 5 years or so. I just wished she can empathize with me, bring a Mum and all, that we’re just concerned with our baby’s health. When he’s older, maybe immune system will be better than no need to be so cautious bah…Sighz….

<font color="0000ff">mylvera,</font>

Wow, just telling in Hakka also kanna from her? Such small issue. Jeez. Poor you.

<font color="0000ff">JanBB,</font>

MIL has 3 children in all. She dotes the most on the youngest, of course. Hubby is the eldest but they didn’t treat him very well when he was young. (He told me.) Maybe can really consider giving Ian a mask but got baby mask meh?
 
janbb
right now, i love them differently as all children are diffrnt. i love #1 for being clever and creative and able to express himself. i love #2 for being cute &amp; cuddly &amp; curious. remember, the love is multiplied, not divided.

mylvera
my dad is teochew and he teaches my kids teochew (arbudden), so when they're at my ILs place &amp; they "show off" their vocab skills, inevitably some will be teochew words (eg bor cheng sa, jiak ba buey). My ILs will also try to teach them some Hakka phrases, but they only meet once a week, how to?!?! So i told my husband that he has to do the job, coz my Hakka cannot make it. Now my elder boy has learnt to say "hv u eaten", "i hv eaten" etc in Hakka
 
wendy,

i dun mind my children know more dialect .. cos not many young generation knows dialect. but am pissed off with her remarks .. y she can teach canto but dun allow my son to know hakka?
 
<font color="0000ff">wendyg,</font>

That’s an idea. Will discuss with Hubby and see what he says. I also don’t want him to be put in a spot. Actually, he told his mum that he won’t bring baby but the 2 of us will go, he also kanna being slammed down phone by her.

<font color="0000ff">Yvonne,</font>

Yeah lor. I also think so leh. That’s why I also feel like having a gal!
 
Is there a milhood forum???? haha...maybe our mils are complaining about us too! Is it us women being territorial or our motherly instincts are too strong...we fight too hard to protect our loved ones.
 
mylvera
ya actually canto and hakka quite similar.. in my opinion!!!

violet
wa lau i think she is being CHILDISH and rude. If i were u i won't bother to mend bridge. If she wants to burn it and husband also agreeable, then let it burn la. Wait until the dog dies then talk.
 
HK:

I really want to go to HK but my hubby never like HK. So looks like I have to g there by myself and my kids if I REALLY want to check it out.

Lynn
You r going to be a SAHM??
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Yvonne
I have to choose night flight because we want to spend Sunday in Sydney. Hahaha. Remember to ask for airport assistance even day or night flight. Less stress for yourself. When I touched Sydney airport, I saw a mother who was in the same flight with me, didn't have any help looks very grouchy. She was so frustrated with handling her toddler and baggages at the same time.
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mylvera,
i am hokkien so is my hubby side...funny thingy is my MIL teach my son to call FIL as YeYe &amp; herself as NaiNai??? i thot it's suppose to be Ah Gong &amp; Ah Ma for hokkien?? cos YeYe &amp; NaiNai is canto?? funni hor?? MIL think Ah Ma sound very old...weird la...
Anyway come to think of it..i also upsad when during mooncake festival last yr, me &amp; hubby bought mooncakes for them but guess how MIL reacted? like i gave poison...she say she HATES mooncakes &amp; waste of $ to spent buying cos my FIL is minor diabetic. I was piss &amp; upsad cos spent $ &amp; all i get is not even a thank you but sarcastic remarks! Lucky FIL appreciated &amp; did say MIL that only U don't eat but other pple still eat mah!
 
violetice &amp; babyling: aiya! wat to do? my sil is my mil's precious darling.. we gav ang bao on yr 2006, so e next yr which is 2007 my hb said giv her sis e same as parents and i said "NO way! we can giv a bit more but definitely not e same how can giv sil few hundred dollars?? giving is a blessing not e $$.."

Janbb: my mum put gong ji zhi, dried scallop and frog leg cook together wif porridge.. she gav my boy once per wk since he was 10mths old till now.
 
mylvera
i keep laffing at your suggestion. i very bad
violetice, you are not alone bah...my mom never listens to anyone, not even my dad...you could say she's a tyrant when i was young. I had so many phone slamming incidents that it doesnt irks me anymore...
my hb doesnt like my dog so whenever we visit my parents he will give me black face, say my dog likes to jump and sniff my bb...wah lau, which dog doesnt?! all they want is to check out the new arrival mah! after sniff sniff liao, my dog will troop away. just cannot take it he doesnt understand dogs...
so now i go home, i will shut my dog in the room. violetice, you can try the same? i know its not 100% foolproof, but if you mil cleans the house prior to Ian stepping in, and enclosed the dog in a room, i think greatly reduce fur/hair at least 50%. strike a balance between Ian's health and the wrath of your mil...hopefully?

just my 2cents worth
 
VioletIce - sorry to hear abt the unhappiness with your MIL there...I guess since this is a happy occasion, try to give a bit of time to calm down first before thinking of an alternative? If they keep the dog in a room somewhere and not near Ian at all, will it affect Ian?

The one thing I was a bit upset over this CNY is that we bought abalone for my PIL, but I feel that they did not seem to appreciate it as much. Never even say anything. Then just because their own daughter bought her Bak Kwa, then she told me about it...I still remember 2 years ago we bought my MIL abalone too, but she not only did not cook it then, somehow she gave it to my SIL and we only knew abt it much later by chance!!

This year we thought just try again and give her to see if she will cook it, but so far have not. If she give it away again, I'm not gg to give her abalone anymore...The reason why we did not get her other goodies is coz my PIL usually get goodies from other pp too, so thought dun wanna duplicate so much.
 
steph,

i had learnt .. dun expect any thank you from ILs. 1st yr of marriage, I asked my hb to give them ang pao on CNY 1st day, guess wat my FIL said?? he said loudly "WAH NOW I OSO GOT ANG PAO AR?" i was thinkg ... erm.. u can reject .. i can save more $$ haha
 
mylvera
maybe it's not their tradition to rcv angpows.. for me and husband, we will give our elders.
And i think older generation hv problem saying THANK YOU or showing appreciation to younger generation.
 
Lynn
Then nid to mince the frog legs or juz throw the legs &amp; boil with the porridge?

violetice
Yes, u can try to prepare frogleg porridge for Ian already.

Steph
RE: Egg (Eh, did u ask abt it huh? Me thot read it juz now.)
My MIL put the whole egg &amp; mix &amp; boil with porridge. But to me look a bit yucky, cos the egg yolk will make the porridge very sticky &amp; yellowish. However, Jayden loves it cos very tasty.
 


JanBB,
if put whole egg into porridge, later got allergic reaction how? we wont know is yolk or white that he is allergic to? whole egg will be too much? or just half for 1st try?
 

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