(2007/09) September 2007 MTBs

hi mummies,

Enfalac milk powder on sale!

im helping my sis to sell off her balance 10 tins of Enfalac milk powder (all unopened, expiry @ year 2009) as she went back to Aus already. Market price selling ard $33. She offers $300 for all the 10 tins.

Please let me know if you are interested. Self collection at yew tee
 


hi bebeng,
i guess we do not have supportive husband who are in fact very crucial at this pt in time.
in fact im also seeking refuge at my mum's place for a week already, nvr go bk. i 'ran away' with my bb, becos im realli sick n exhausted with everything. my fil called mi, but i refused to answer his call cos i realli dun feel like toking to him...his actions n my hubby 'bochapness' realli lead mi to a depression. sumtimes i hold my bb n cry..i feel very sorrie towards my bb, n reali afraid tt my emotions may affect her development...
i do not agree that my fil tinks tt by providing milk powder $ for my bb, my hubby has fulfil his duty as a father..his interference caused my hubby n i to drift cos sumtimes when i realli not free or super tired, i wldnt even dare to ask my hubby to change diaper of feed my bb becos my fil may tink tt tis is MY duty n not his son...
he only care abt his son, n forget abt the mother n daughter...
 
Darmae,

Ya maegan is making up for all the lost feeds at night...jialat
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You poor thing...you must be exhausted. I agree its important to wake babies up for feeding during the day, then they get enuf milk and can sleep thru during the night! Your MIL is abit weird leh...she keep baby in her room all day?? My heart dropped when I read your baby cry for 1 hour then she come out and ask maid to make milk
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Elaine,

call me when u need people to talk to..my line is always open for you okay...at the meant time take care...try to talk to your hubby if possible..do communicate with him...communication between husband and wife is very very important
 
Hi angel, I'm also interested in the float, if you have spares, let me know.
Tks
Elaine and Bebeng, you must be strong for your baby. Try to talk to your hubbies.... My hubby also told me he need to have quality sleep, but he is willing to look after baby during the day when im busy with housework.
 
pinkyj,

my mum is currently taking care of my niece. and my sis expecting a 2nd kid. dun wan to overload her, wats more, my mum will be living wif bro n sil as they will be married nx year. so my next beta option will be infantcare if mil contd wif her tricks.
she's like forcing maegan to sleep n sleep... seems to hv forgotten the equally important 'feed'.


angel,

my mil sure is weird lor. hw can she allow bb to cry so long??? the thing is she nv did tat when i was around. actually the main thing is i still cant trust leaving my bb allow with the maid alone at home. otherwise i wun ned to 'trouble' my mil. main thing is i juz ned her ard to overlook.. juz in case. i nv expect her to take care cos my maid is basically familiar trained on the routine liao. sigh...
 
darmae,

actually to avoid conflicts with your in-law, best is to place baby in infant care..infant care can help to train your bb also...

rxsti,
you still interested in putting your child in joewe? I always picks up my girl in the evening around 6 plus, you can pop by and say hi!By the way my darling is in the infant care at serangoon north
 
Hi TinyVoice and Angel,
The bumbo seat I intend to let go is in tip top condition. It looks brand new and come with a box. I am not familiar with the PM thingy. If you wish to discuss further, please email to me at [email protected]
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darnmae,

yalor.. better to put in infant care to avoid conflicts like wat wiselyn said.. and cryin too long for bb is not good leh.. i read in the net tat if bb's cry is responded quickly then they will tend to cry lesser.. and will be more secure when they are growin up.. maybe ur ard tat's y ur mil dun dare 'chut pattern'...
 
yeah.. wiselyn,

i agree wif the option - infant care.
somehow, i feel that mil (not all of cos) will hv some funny habits and those 'i raised 3 kids singlehandedly etc when it comes to taking care of bb.
i'm staying in serangoon.. so might be looking at joewe at serangoon north, clara's is in. unless i can find a nearer location.


juz finished expressing... yield very bad, dropped by half. guess i'm hv lack of sleep and wif the added stress. having headache oso... very sian
 
Dear mummies

Happen to read this thread. Those who do not have supportive husband you must really voice out. Though i do not have inlaw problems,but sometimes my husband can be unreasonable too. Here's my story to share which happens weeks ago:

My son (Jovan)now 21 mths, woke up for feed middle of night 3 or 4AM, then did not sleep back again. I pat his backside, sing song, also cannot sleep. Then ask for milk again 1 to 2 hrs time, bluff me again lor, i make liao he dun wan sleep, then drink water. Then ard 5+am, ask for my MIL, i say she is sleeping, cannot wake her. I carry him, he kept insisting want to go over my MIL room...crying very pitiful. My husband got woke up by his crying, he scold me ask me to let him go to his mum there or i put jovan down at his bed leave him alone.. But i dun wan to disturb my inlaw sleep.

How can i woke her up to ask her pat jovan sleep! I put jovan down, he was screaming at this time, then my hubby on the light shout at him. I told him don't shout like that! He says how come i don't know how to take care of kids (this is not the first time he say that to me). This time, both my inlaws walked into our room ask wat happen, i did not say anything, They carry jovan into their room to pat him sleep. I so angry with my hubby at shouting at us! I lay down in bed crying sliently. At 6:30am i woke up to bath, changed, and he ask me from the bed why so early, he ask me go over cuddle, i did not speak a single word to him. Simply treat him transparent. Then i left the hse at 715am.

At downstairs i was still fuming and i know i need to let him know abt it and i sms him " I hate it whenever u always say i don't know how to take care of kids. I don't want Jovan go and disturb ur mum sleeping. Who is the one who on the light and shout at jovan and still want to blame me. I'm always the one who cater to his needs when he want milk or when he hav nightmare asking for me, U don't have the right to say that i don't know how to take care of him!"

He replied he feels bad after that and says he will wait for jovan wake up hug hug him and he say sorry to me.

So we really need to let our hubby knows how we feel cos they are from Mars. We are from Venus. Men and women are made so differently so must try to understand how each works to have a peaceful life! Communicate more and spend more quality time together.
 
darmae,

i know there is one inside Sheng Siong at Serangoon North...New one coming up at Hougang Mall..Can check them out too!
 
actualli, becos my hubby n fil had 'trained mi' to tink tt bb is MY responsibility..im also starting to start saying tings to my hubby like tis is MY BB, my daughter...etc...when my hubby came over my mum plc to see bb, i m even starting to disallow him to touch her...
tink my depression getting from bad to worse.
my hubby just said : i tink u shld go n see a dr..(shldnt he b brging mi to dr, instead of still expecting mi to go dr myself to treat depression?)
anywae, my sis had been kind enuff to tk leave n brg mi to a GP to seek treatment..but the medicine is mking mi nauseous n giddy.
 
Hi darmae,
I think your maid will do a better job than your MIL lor..at least she will follow your instructions! But abit difficult to tell your MIL to 'hands off!' and let your maid take care hor...Hmmmm..tough situation to be in!!! I think I will be in the same boat with you when I return to work and leave my baby & maid at my SIL's house.
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Elaine,
I really feel heart pain for you after reading what happened to you. Is your hubby like that before baby came? As in does he expect you to do everything on your own?
 
Hi Elaine,

Just wan to share with you.
I also have confinement nanny for the 1st month of maternity. Afterwhich, I was alone by myself and bb. 1st day after confinement nanny left, i was so lost, sit there crying. Luckily, I manage to speak to my hubby that I really need his help.
He was on one week leave at home, trying to see if I can cope well. That week for me was really horrible but I survived. My own mother who is also working gave me a lot encouragement, telling me that I need to be strong even my hubby was not around in the day. She tell me I have to be independent. I learn the hard way. Everyday, I plan what I want to do, when to wash clothes, what time to cook. Normally I only cook simple for lunch and dinner, which is thrown all the indregient to one pot and make it into soup and cook rice only for lunch and dinner. For the 2nd and 3rdmonth onward, almost everyday i have the same type of food - fish soup. My bro ask me to give up BF is possible. My milk suppy dropped as was too busy with the household chores, then i tell myself, nvm, i will continue to pump till the milk supply really no more. I stopped pumping these few days liao as really no more. Believe me, we woman can really handle the bb on our own. My hubby is very busy with work, seldom helped out. Since I on maternity leave, I am the one taking care of the bb even at night. If your in-law being nasty again, just tell them nicely, such, if u got no time to cook, advise them ta bao, telling you not washing clothes, tell them you will do it later when u not that tired. U cant expect them to know what u thinking and feeling. Hope you rest well and take good care.
By the way, my bro also say if one cant take it can really go crazy, if u need rest, place your bb at infant for a few days, check if they are available. Anyway, I just found a nanny agency , 97472405. They should be able to help you get a nanny. Only when you rest well and recovered then you will have the energy to take care of yourself. I am starting work soon as office has called up to ask me to go back. I alos have my own set of challenge, co ask transfer me all the way to clementi, and i stay in hougang. Anyway, always look on the bright side, everything always has it own solution.
 
Elaine,
Just know that its the raging hormones that is making you depressed and extra-sensitive to things, and plus the stress of taking care of a newborn. It will definetely get better soon
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Just hang in there and think positive...you gave birth to a beautiful girl and she's all that matters now
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thanks wiselyn,

i will go check it out. first of all, must convince my hubby on infant care.


angel,

yeah, my maid can def do a better job. she is more sincere and sensitive to maegan's need. but i still cant convince myself to leave maegan alone with her... so infant care will be in my consideration list.


Elaine,

i hope you are feeling beta now. it is too 'traditional' for your fil to think that money is all his son is required to give to a family. baby needs more than just money, she needs the love and attention as much. shouldnt leave you alone to shoulder all the responsibilities.

at least you have an outlet to vent - thru forum. dun keep it to yourself, else depression will be worse. focus on our bb girl, your mum and sis who have been supportive all these while...that can keep you going strong
 
i live with my inlaws too. just want to share a abit on how it goes in my house.

hubby's support is the most most impt of all..... elaine, bebeng, my heart goes out to you....... but communication is all you can do now to improve the situation..... i always remind my hubby that we are a family unit. just me , him and bb. there bound to be conflicts living together with his parents and often, there is no right or wrong , just depending on which perspective you are looking from. but he should always stand on my side, and its v impt he does so. its v difficult if he start siding with his mum,etc. this would cause a drift between us, and it gets complicated.

so far, things have been good. anything that i am not happy with, i would call him immediately and "complain". he would then tell his parents straight, nicely of coz. in a way, it works coz my in laws know he is on my side, no point complaining to my hubby on anything anyway.
 
elaine, jus to share my experience too.

my mil comes over now to help out with bb. when things go wrong, i will tell my hb and he will offer to tell off his mum. but i feel that whatever happened was between me and his mum. i just needed a listening ear. he is really a source of comfort. in the beginning he was not like that. he just expects me to take care of the bb all by myself. when bb cries very loud and very long, he din even bother but jus sat infront of his comp and continue working. i had to tell him off (while crying at the same time cos so pek chek mah) that the bb belongs to BOTH of US and not just mine alone! then now he quite automatic la...when bb cries for long, he will offer to see if he needs to help carry the bb. =D
 
Wiselyn, I'm still considering infantcare.... Hows your baby doing at Infantcare? What kind of instruction do you give to the carer? Some people tell me that the carer will leave the baby to cry if cant cope cos only 1 or 2 carer to 5 - 8 babies.....this is my main concern actually.
 
rxsti,

their ratio is abt 1:5 that is the standard set by MCYS. i was told by them that they will be bring in more teachers...they take good care of your baby (you can be rest assured).And my feel is that it is ok for baby to cry for awhile and not be attended to immediately, but their cry must be acknowledge..

Clara is doing very well....after going to infant care she is less cranky..and more well behaved..
 
Hi <font color="0000ff">Wiselyn</font>..
I agree with u! Edison is now less cranky after going to infant care... Previously, he likes to cry for attention and likes ppl to carry him.. Now, he can play with himself on the bouncer and more well-behaved..

Hi <font color="0000ff">rxsti</font>..
Yeah, you can be assured of infant care.. The teachers there are experienced... I ask the teachers for advise too, and they gladly assist me..
 
Hi mummies,

just need to ask, now BB 2 mths ++ already, he always shows his smile but not type of loud laughing, when they start to laugh wf great sound??
 
Emily,

i guess we have been "spoiling" our babies when they are at home....once they cry we attend to them and let them have the "habit" of seeking of attention..Now at infant care, they get less attention, so they learn how to play and entertain themselve.....which i feel is better..at least we can get things done...just leave them on the bouncer and play...
 
Hi Mummies, haven been logging in because of ISO audit in my company!!!Argh....

I feel very sad after hearing all the stories abt MIL... they have been mothers before too, why cant they understand how mothers feel..
I do not have a MIL but i do have a huge group of aunties and uncles in law who will always take turns to pass Ryann around everytime i go to granny's hse. Some of them will try to 'Teach' me their methods of taking care of bb. Usually if i dun agree, i will tell them the reason, if they cannot accept, i will say doc say one. Then they will diam diam already. Certain things give and take i dun mind becos i only bring ryann there once a week. but if staying together, i also cant take it.If staying together will cost more conflicts, then i rather move out at least whenever we meet again, it is still a happy scene. once a week, you want to carry the baby, go ahead carry all u want, to me it is a light duty day, any way it is just one day.
I agree with some mummies, hubby support is very impt.
Throughout my confinement and my 2nd month, my hubby never wake up at night before. He slp like a log in the living room and i slp in the room with my mum. Cos i stay at mums place. I also get really upset that my hubby is not supportive. Guys are usually like this, they are playmats to babies but when it comes to taking care of their needs, i feel mummies still do a better job, we are more cautious. during that 2 months, he only learn to shower Ryann 2 times and is only after i told him off then he learn. Till now pampers also sometimes wear so loose till will leak. What i hate most is i must repeat the same issue over and over again at least for 3 times before it is absorb in his head. So frustrating.Some more his auntie say he is very gd in taking care of babies.I almost faint ... Now at night if i cannot tahan le, i will wake him up and say: Ur son wants milk!. and go back to slp =p Certain things i feel we shld always stand firm if not next time things will get worse cos they will take things for granted.
I hope all mummies will be able to solve all the problems soon.
God create woman with the ability to give birth and not the guys because we are stronger then them thus we can all go thru this hard ship.
BE A PROUD MUMMY!
 
Haha phoebe...well said!!

That is why there's this song created for all mummies "Shi4 shang4 zhi2 you3 ma1 ma1 hou3"
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And the only song for daddy is "Ke ren lai, kan pa pa, pa pa bu zai jia".
 
Hi <font color="0000ff">Wiselyn</font>..
Totally agree with u... No regret sending Edison to infant care... The infant care really discipline our child.. hee
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Now, after I pick him up from infant care, I let him play on the bouncer himself, and I can spend sometime doing housechores and rest... He is not that "attention-seeking" anymore..
 
phoebe,

i got to say...guys hates nagging and they need encouragment...even if what they do is not up to our standard...we have to acknowlege their willingness to help...and not fault them for things that they do wrongly..but just tell them and encourage them, so that they can do better..

NO ONE IS PERFECT EXCEPT OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR
 
Em, Wise,
Now I feel like sending my girl to infant care leh...you say until so good!
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But I really wonder...with a ratio of 1:5, how does the staff there cope! I am already so tired with 1:1, can't imagine taking on another 4 babies! Must feed them, burp, play, change diapers, bathe them x 5!
 
angel, of cos they can cope.. they are on shift leh.. u're facin ur bb 24 hours!! the teachers there jus need to see them 8 hours then aft tat go home liao.. hahha
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again

Hi mummies,

need your advise

just need to ask, now BB 2 mths ++ already, he always shows his smile but not type of loud laughing, when they start to laugh wf great sound??
 
Hi <font color="0000ff">angel</font>..
Curently, there are 16 "students" at the infant care.. Among the 16, 6 of them are below 6 months and 10 above 6 months.. They have separate rooms for these 2 groups.. This is good to prevent the older babies to disturb the younger ones.. They have 4-5 teachers, so the ratio is abt 1:4.. So far, I din see any lack of manpower in the infant care.. Everytime I pick my son there, I feel that the teachers are actually "in-control" of the babies.. No one crying unattended... I'm happy that they actually discipline my spoiled son.. hee
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Furthermore, they work on shift.. So, the teachers wont get too stressed-up..

Frankly, the 1:1 is really very tiring.. During my ML, I am so tired taking care of my son.. After all the stress during the day, I tend to get irritated easily & thus quarrelled with my HB when he get home..

But situation improved now after I resume work.. Lifestyle back to normal, except having to take care of BB at night... But both of us enjoy the hours after work with baby..

I'm glad everything goes back to normal now... I almost went crazy during my ML...
 
wiselyn,

i saw joewe's website... they hv 2 infant care at ave 3 n at ave 4. currently i'm in discussion with hubby... he still dun feel comfortable. but i told him i duno when i might 'blow' at mil.. tis will strain the relationship lor.
 
hi mummies...
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jus a quick check: does ur bbs poo every day?
mines not pooing much these days...infact, he din poo for 2days now..

i noe maybe its common? but i can't help feeling worried..tks... sighz...

really worried...
 
hi Charsiew,

Its fine for baby not to poo for a few days if they are on bm, that means they are absorbing the bulk of the nutrients.

Haiz, my gal has been pooing at 5am for the past 2 days when i latch her on! So sianz, have to clear her up when i m half-awake and cant see clearly.
 
charsiew,

it's normal even though not poo everyday.
for my boy, i let him poo in d potty everyday...so he poo poo every day
 
tks mummies for your reply..phew!!
happy.gif

felt more relieved now..
actually my bb is on partial EBM & FM, so i am quite worried when he doesn't poo for
quite some time. Previously he poos almost every meal! so i am v puzzled & worried
as this is such a big change..so strange..



hi PoohWei, wahh.. ur bb is so on time everyday? at 5am!
it mus be v sianz for u..cos its quite diff to clean properly under dim light
& in a sleepy state..haiz.. take care!
 
hi Radiance, how old is ur bb now?
potty training so soon?? so cute!!
Is his neck firm already? My bb is now 2mths+,
but still need to wk on the neck strengthening..
but quite diff as he hates to be on his tummy.. hmm...
 


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