(2007/03) March 2007 MTBs

belle/QQ,
K has a lot of things , good news is now she has a lil cousin, can pass them over
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some of her old stuff, clothes, toys already at my bro's.
 


Astro< wanna add on to what u type, the comment for SQ...

" i have a senior.. her youngest kid is 5 mths older than yh.. now she is preggy with #3.. next year april due.. i wonder how she can cope.. but again she's high flier.. and we know opportunities wait for these pple? "

I don;t really think its oppprtunities that wait specifically for these ppl, she must be a very capable woman, which is why she can pick up anytime she goes back to the workforce. So i guess if u are capable, nothing to worry, opportunities will come most of the time. make sense?
 
Star: agree.. she is capable.. but does it have to depend on the circumstances at that pt in time? this lady highly favoured..so hence i am saying 'opportunities wait for her'.. i am def not in her league.. so if i miss an opportunity as in now.. it is like what u all say. it might not come back again.. so hence must grab..

in a way then i am disagreeing with the phrase ' So i guess if u are capable, nothing to worry, opportunities will come most of the time. '.. ha.. confusing? :p

Miser always say 时机..meaning.. there is this 'time' element in the an opportunity.. not all opporunities are right.. u need to wait and capitalise on the one at the RIGHT time.. so i am asking myself.. when is the right time? maybe there isn't one right time? or the right time is NOW, or never?
 
astro: i am surprised cos u didn;t give me the impression that u would like many children.. hahah my personal opinion only lah. u look like those that would stop at just 1 kid.. heheh, just an impression i guess.
 
star: i am a detached parent.. and yes. i am not particularly fond of them coz i am lazy and don't like to clean up aft them.. also i am not v maternal in nature too, ha!

but i do realise that when we have more kids.. it is less of a burden for them (the kids) to take care of us when we get old.. and for the kids.. it is always better ot have more siblings to grow up with...like how i value my sis .. but i think if i have another bro/sis.. it would be better.. well.. that's my impression..

i remembered telling miser.. , after watching a documentary about poor l iving conditions of kids in slums.. and after my visit to romania when i see kids teng age begging on the street.. and yh age sleeping in train stations in winter.. .... that poor pple perhaps shdn't have kids?.. coz the kid is disadvantaged from the start.... while we are all hyper about the kind of activities for our kids.. those kids at the train stations might not even have their basic immunization.. it was then i realsed.. we are fortunate to be born in SG!..
ha. anyway.. Miser paused.. and replied ...'but if they dun have a kid.. they might not even have a chance to get out of this poverty.. a child to them is a 希望...'.. and that got me thinking again... ha.. i shd credit miser more for keeping my brain cells alive..
 
astro,
just do it, dun wait for wise man liao.
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haha!!
actually AAA suggested a good idea, write down your thinking/feelings, then sort out one by one, you willknow what youwant eventually.

by writing all down, I believe you will say GO AHEAD in career.
oh what you mean is your peers all faster in career, not family ah? i tot all have kids liao, then also chiong well in career...
i see i see. they need bf? i have candidates here.
sometimes i feel like i can set up an agency for match making. haha!!
 
QQ: ha.. ya. i meant i 'slower' in terms of career lah.. they slower in terms of setting up family.. not wanting to compare.. we all know famiy is more valueable than work.. but for pple like me.. i also value the self actualisatoin part from work.. so end of the day.. which is more valuable? maybe we can have both at the same time.. jsut that we might not have more of each? or maybe i shd start to see having a famiy and a stable job as a form of self actulisation.. ? how far i can go up.. leave it to fate..que sera sera?

yeap. they need bfs.. quite badly .. :p i have a fren.. who cant believe out of the gang i am the one who got married earliest.. and have 2 kids.. i told her.. 'not me.. coz miser v old liao!'...
 
astro, i am also quite agree with you that the TIME is not always just nice for you to have both. shi2 ji1 is really important, plus the ppl, and everything = opportunities.
not everyone has the opportunities de.
anyway when i gaodim this ah will, settle him liao then i will go create my shiji..
chim
 
astro
i believe, in ur line of work, it's still possible to excel and do well and gain actualisation as u age. but with child bearing.. it's now and not the future liao. so there!! spread ur seeds! :p esp since u r so productive! ;)
 
astro,
ya nothing can be 101% done, and achieve to the maximum., we have limited resources, limited time, and limited of everything. so what we can do is to maximise, but not 101% of everything.

So depends on how we think.
family is valuable, but career wise is also importnat. so eventually we have to decide and BALANCE. i have seen career women who have kids, then they dont care much about their kids, just put them in msia and let mil/mother take care. if they are so stubborn and wanting to change diapers, train their kids, educate kids by themselves, they will not make such arrangement. plus, then they also cannot spend that much time in career.
so must balance, and the balance is always coming from our own requirement and beliefs
 
aiyoh. this titu makes me sound like a ...sow?! :p yeap. u spot on on age being the critical factor here.. time and tide wait for no woman..

QQ: yeap.. balance.. so i am go and close myself in a room and THINK? :p
 
Kaexin: ok. Thanks. Remember to ask me to pay COD if I didn t. Hey where do u get the Lego sets? I want to get more.

Autum: where did u get the catalogue?

Astro: I gather from your post that all mothers feel guilty they don t spend enough time with or do enough for the children. I have the same thoughts, and my guilt is that I m a SAHM! *sighs*
And abt the children taking care of you when you re old, pls don t have that as a reason for having another kid, cos if they do, it s a bonus. But don t count on it. On the practical side, living costs will just go higher and it ll become increasingly difficult to eke out a living for the future generations. So how can they be tasked to take care of parents too? In fact, I envision the next generation being dependent on parental support for a longer period, with marriage age being later.
The other point of singles being more able to chiong at career, it s so true. I used to work with a few single women before. They re super meticulous and hardworking. Nevis there is no distraction and no where aka no one else to spend their time with. It s a by-product of being single. Don t need to compare, cos it s such a blessing that is beyond measure to have found The One.
 
And u know what? Eventually all these single women got married very late and still quit their job. So see? Family is still more important, even for these women.

Age shouldn't be a concern to u as you re still young. I know of one career minded woman who got pregnant with her first child at late 40 plus! And she was so glad! She quit to stay home with the child.

And hubby and I know of sooo many couples who can t have children. Some have accepted fate, while others are still trying. One has even prepared a big room for future children. The guy is in his fifties by the way!
 
His wife is on her early 40s bhah. They re dying to get an heir/heiress.

Bottomline is this. When we look at someone, we may think he/she looks to gave everything. But even so, that person will feel he/she is lacking in some area, whatever that might be, and that can be real or just in the mind. Whatever. But very few can look at himself/herself and say that I have enough.
 
AAA,
paiseh, my hubby says give the extra box to my niece. actually can get from TRU, they are having some sales items, this same one costs $25.90 usual is $39.90.
 
QQ: ha!

Sq/AA: i was trying to share that when it comes to sharing of load and figuring out a solution to a problem.. two brains are better than one.. and three brains are better than 2.. so even if they dun take care of their parents that much. at least they have another person to talk to .. and share their troubles to?.. and yes.. the practical side is rising costs.. ha.. Miser just bought another insurance for himself.. and asked me to buy one.. with riders for both boys.. ha!
then the agent said ' u all having more kids? then i need to recalculate.. ' .. miser went 'just asking'.. kekeke..
and yeap. it is a blessing to have found the one... afterall life is transient.. i can't bring the director title into my grave.. bt i could be happy with a secure and happy family?.. ha..

maybe it is my environment.. i am constantly reminding myself.. that if if they grow up to spew vulgarities like saying good morning.. it is my fault.. if they grow up to be soo disllusioned at society (as one kid in my class is.. he used to be a from a famous JC).. then it is also my inability.. maybe that's why i am v tentative and concerned whe it comes to character and education for kids..
 
AA: guess what.. that song is one of my favourites! hahaha.. ops.. ok. i need to stop listening to songs like that.. another one of my favourites is.. 'i believe i can FLY!'.. oh oh. i need to cut down and listend to more... 满足 songs!

I think miser is always amused with my trivialities.. (dunno coz this word or not.. haha). to him.. life seems.. fine.. and okay.. ha. is he a 满足 man?
 
Kaexin: ok.. Aiyah.. I ll go to tru one day.. Thanks..

SQ: No lah. I m mad.. I want to go back to work! I will when opportunities arise. Right now I just feel very comfortable being able to wake up at 9 plus 10 and go on with my super lazy life... :p I do get bored and that s when I wish I m still working.. But thing is... I remember when working that I used to complain I m bored and was contemplating when to quit.. Haha... Funny lah, Man...
 
SQ: ok i help u lelong, aiyo ur price is so good, now i feel imbalance!!! hahaha!!!

astro: i think u dun need any of your advise, u r doing good. u r someone that will know what to do in the end. and u have miser as your beacon..sure won;t make the wrong decision.
 
astro, AAA,
I dont always feel 满足 one.
but my sis does. so both of us have different characters though we are from the same family.
and what i can say is my sis is happier in general.
 
Astro: It used to be one of my fav too cos it speaks to my heart.. Keke..
My hubby is also a super happy-go-lucky person, I m very amazed by how much he s handling and still not looking or being bothered. Is this another man thing?
 
QQ: But I always feel you re a happy go lucky person wor. I think your post natal blues could be affecting you now.
And hor, it s not a bad thing to want more. In fact, the survival and progress of the society depends on people who are always hungry fir more. So I guess we all need to balance it out. That the hunger is a driving force to keep us going, and not a dampening force to make us doubt ourselves or a confusing force making us go round and round.. Haha..
 
AAA,
oh, i do sometimes. and i keep telling myself to stay happie.
but my sis is even happier. haha!!
she is the same as my mum.
i am more tao-hong according to my mum. but my dad was also another taohong person.
 
hello, popping in to give comments!

Astro
u are not having midlife crisis. you are just on a crossroad. MLC is worse than this.

i just feel that we are here to make choices after choices. if you choose (A), u will forgo some benefits of (B) and vice versa. It's never-ending. and human tend to look back and regret that they did not choose the other option because they keep focusing on what they have lost but overlook what they have gained.

Give yourself time to weigh the options and ask yourself which one is your priority. Choose already, just go ahead. Life is fair, you gain some, you loose some. nothing is perfect.

you are still young. Im the youngest mum among my frens
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but truth is that they are not as fertile and most likely going for IVF. While i was heavily pregnant, they were still enjoying life. Now that I want to enjoy life, they are trying hard for babies.
 
Star: wah thanks for the affirmation! thanks for your advice.. it was helpful
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AA: haha! yeap.. so what now? shd we all change to be men? :p

QQ/AA: i would say what we discussed on having a balance is vital. if we can't be contented with what we have.. and keep wanting more.. irrationally.. then it is not good..
 
Pink: yeap. cross roads..dunno which path to choose!.. can i have both? heh..it sounds like.. what i am currently doing it just fine then.. do what needs to be done. but when #3 comes along.. then he/she.. (well i hope it is a she!!!!) shd take priority!

i really like how u put it wor.. dun look back and regret.. and every cup shd be half... full.
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yeap.. the biological clock is quite merciless on women!
 
Astro
hahhaa im also on the crossroad.
after going for a few interviews, i feel so stressed. im not sure if I'm ready to GO OUT to work, been in the comfort zone for too many yrs. interviewers asked me whether I'm ready to hunt for sales etc..tho i knock my head, im freaking out inside :p

on the other hand, im also asking myself if i should do something small or less stressful job, get a pay cut and spend more time with my kids. Question is if i dun do it now, im hitting my Big 4 in 5 yrs time. If not now, then when?
 
astro: can i pour some cold water? not true tt w more siblings, they can share n talk to. it depends. me n my 2 older bros dun tok much

AAA: if u need clothes for urself, can shop ASOS. i've not bot anything b4 tho
 
SQ: pls show me your HK funtainer the next time we meet. i wanna see the real thing.
the may11 mums also recommend ASOS, i went in but dunno how to shop there.
 
Ash: Noe in the mood to buy clothes online for myself.. I'm still hoping to buy more SB stuff. Crazy.. Just ordered so much recently.. :p I think I'll get a shock when they arrive one by one.. And then I may get into depression, when I see that I've got so much stuff, and I don't use them up fast enough. :p
 
Oh yah, this big S is getting married to one of the richest heir in China! But I think everyone has read that news here.. She looks damn sexy in the movie, can't remember the name.. The recent one that starred Michelle Yeoh..
 
Ash: ha.. ok.. you are right.. i have seen bros and sis.. sibling rivalry too..

Pink: haha..ok.. u haven't accepted the job yet? i thought u have leh..

AA: i read that link when i am home.. :p i haven't do my work. and i out for a Karasokay session with my colleagues later! oh no!
 
hahah... u all hor seeing the topic is really funnie... mid life crisis... sow... entertainment news...WHO need Yahoo! here cover all aspects.

Ash, i agree on the part on sharing load among siblings. I think it is even strong when my granny passed on. My father is the only son and i am the only dotter of my dad. So generally my dad will have to shoulder many responsibilites about the wake. And being a dotter i have to share his load as well. Cos we are still traditional chinese and buddhist, we need to man the wake. But i am very thankful of my cousins who are mostly christian. They help to take the night shift. Thou they are not suppose to pray using joss stick but cos is our grandma and we have to ensure that there is continuouation of joss stick at the altar, my cousins do their duty as grandchildren and do wat they are suppose to do. 我真的横感激他们。oppps tear again. everytime mentioned about my granny's death. I cant help but cry sighhh...
 
AAA
the bravegirlsclub site looks interesting. i dun think i have the discipline to go thru the online workshop.

Astro
havent. first one asked me to manage a team, i kinda feel im not up to it. 2nd one...think im a bit old and expensive
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AAA
Legos can be bot everywhere le. TRUs, isetan, metro, etc. There is a Lego store in Plaza Sing on the 3rd floor. U always go PS but didn't notice? They have this huge Lego girraffe outside the store. I got my catalogue from that shop. There are other various Lego shops too. In Taka etc.
 


Pink, no one is old and expensive. U mean antique dun worth a cent meh. Is depend on how u view urself, if u dun try now how will u know u cannot manage. Aiyah mother can manage the world, from finance, domestic affair, to children, to husband, to maid, to mil and even ur surrounding. hahah... 说废话
 

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