(2007/03) March 2007 MTBs

SQ
YE inherit your SK2 skin?

Mist
hiaz...i still have to work from home ..its never-ending.

AAA
wow wat happened to that smart maid? is she fired?

Astro
If Ellie is helping out with bb, Teng goes to school, how does your mum help? do u take care of YH most of the time?

my ex nanny marisa is coming tomorrow. now im thinking wat she can help out with. Enya is basically sleeping and drinking thru out the day while leia is in cc. Rina can do housechores and even take nap..maybe i'll ask either of them to cook.
 


rr
im hoping to get before end feb...latest 3 weeks from now?

ash
for cakes? been asking leia wat cake she wants. she said ariel cake.
 
AAA: phil and indo maids dun really get along. cuz phil maids always assume superiority over indo maid. even phil maids from different areas dun get along.

HJ: if ur hubby really wants proof, tell him to take 1 week of leave and STAY AT HOME AND WATCH THE KIDS. dun talk to u about proof and giving chances when he is not the one facing it all the time.
 
pink, how long do they need to ship out disney items?
i have drugstore, RL order on the way to vpost. thinking that if i want to order some, also can order today. right? if they ship out quite fast.
 
Mummies.. Are you all interested to hear me pour out my maid story?? I have the story ready.. Hahaha.. I think I can write a book on maids.. And I told hubby maybe we shd set up a maids training centre.. :p
 
AAA, come!
today my ears ok.
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ready liao.
 
aaa
shot

re: cakes
this am i ask ye wat cake to get for her papa's bday. she says spider man. where to find spider man cake??!!

i asked her wat she wants for her bday she says mickey mouse. <yawn> we just had a 3kg mickey mouse for teachers day. now i wonder how to make my cake look "different"
 
QQ: Hehe.. Thanks for the listening ear..
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It's gonna be a super long post! I'll break it up into parts. After you read, you'll see why I get stressed over maids..

Before we moved to this house, I've only changed 1 maid in 2 yrs (then I also only had 1 child). And the reason for the change was because the old maid wanted to come back and work for us.
But eversince I moved to this place, I've changed 6 going to be 7 maids (in only 12mths!). Out of all the maids I've changed, I only let 1 go, the rest quit on us.
 
Here's my story:
#1) One (philly, ex HK) went back cos of family issues. (She's the same one who came back and worked for us a second time round. She started acting up in her attitude so we let her go when she wanted to.)

#2) Indo (ex Sing)- the additional maid we got when we moved into this house. Quit on her own accord cos she said her health can't take it. She said she's been having fainting spells, and she's afraid she'll fall when carrying my boy up and down the flight of stairs at my place. (This one is good with cooking and with kids, and I wished we could have convinced her to stay but her mind was made up.)

#3) Desperate to have someone come in to help, there was this transfer maid (philly, no overseas exp) who was available then. She's a 5.5 pointer, can't cook, not very thorough in her chores, so-so with children. I close one eye.

#4) A friend of my hubby wanted to let go of his maid (philly) cos they have no need of a maid anymore. The maid worked for him for 6mths, and he spoke very very highly of this maid, and as we needed another one, we took her in just based on the friend's word, without interviewing her. Reason was also cos my hubby's friend didn't want the maid to know she's leaving until the very last minute.
Turns out she has no experience handling young children. My hubby's friend didn't let her handle his children before. She can cook but not that great. She's not very thorough. After she mops the kitchen floor, the floor is still oily; after she cleans the sink, remnants of food are left on the sink, and ants are crawling on the wall tiles cos she missed out cleaning the tiles above the sink. She always has a perpetual smile on her face and when asked a question, she tends to smile without answering - we don't know if she doesn't understand us or what! And she likes to stare into space. She handles the cooking and before I knew it and told her not to, she eats before she serves us the food. Overall, another 5.5 pointer. I close one eye.
 
>>>> At this point of story, we have 2 5.5 pointers at home. They don't seem to be getting along very well. We found out then we're pregnant with #3 and something needs to be done to the present situation cos the 2 won't be able to cope with 3 children + housework + cooking. Question: Both are 5.5 pointers, who to let go first? Decided to let go of #3 cos she cannot cook, although she's the better of the 2. So she is the only maid I let go.

#5) Philly (no overseas exp). Agent said one of her good maids highly recommended her. Can take care of young children. I phone- and skype- interviewed her, seems acceptable so we took her in. She was ok in the beginning, but very soon sank into depression. She would be listless and joyless. She's missing home. I encouraged her and got the agent to talk to her etc etc. I told her she needed to help herself out of the depression. She told me she could not handle both my boy and girl at the same time. Said she only has 1 child herself and could only handle one child at one time. I wanna faints! I have 2 now, with one coming. And she started arguing back. So time for her to leave.

>>>>> Back at the agency, she wanted to go back to the philly instead of going to work for another employer, but she hasn't finished her bond. Agency "counselled" her and told her unless her family can pay back the loan, she can't go back. Then she said she wanted to come back to work for me. At that time I already had #6 who is looking very good, so no of course to her request to come back.

#6) Philly ex-UAE. She's a transfer maid (she quit on her previous employer). I met her at the agency's when I was going through some data files. She can cook, is clean in her household chores and can take care of my boy well. I am happy that at least the search for maids has ended. Never mind that there is a 5.5 pointer around, at least I have one good one who can cover for the shortfall. My happiness was short-lived. She started complaining that my boy wakes up too many times at night. And she has difficulty getting back to sleep after that. Taked to the agent twice and then she decided she wanted to quit as well. Her health is more important cos she has a son back home. Lack of sleep is really getting onto her. So we let her go.
 
>>>>At this point, I tell myself I better get the maids who quit on us to write a letter citing reasons for their departure. lest the MOM questions me for frequent change of maids. So she wrote an apology letter citing her reasons for leaving.

#7) The current Philly (no overseas exp). 4 days on arriving, she said she wanted to quit. I was really angry. Something is wrong with the maids from this agency, why do the maids from her always think they have a choice to come and go as they please? Told the agent if she wants to leave, then she can go home to the philly. Agent spoke to her, and then she decided to stay on. Apologised for her initial reaction etc etc. I accepted her apology.

>>>Remember the 5.5 pointer pointer maid transferred from my hubby's friend? 2 weeks after #7 arrived, she said she's very tired and wanted to go home liao. (She's worked 1yr in total by now - 6mths for that friend, and 6mths with us). I was immuned to maids quitting on us at this point. I was half-consoled and half-sad. Consoled cos she's not that good anyway, sad cos I have to look for a new maid yet AGAIN. And I also got her to write me a letter citing reasons for her departure.

>>>>I interviewed and short-listed 2 maids (one after another). I described to them their job scope - big house, 3 small children, 2 maids working alongside, no off days. Both of them didn't report back to the agent when called up to go for medical check-up. :p

#8) The current Indo (transfer maid, ex Sing). I was hesistant getting her in at first, knowing I have a philly at home. I interviewed her on the phone, her english is acceptable, I was willing to take a risk, cos my due date is drawing near. She turns out much better than expected. Can cook, is clean, can handle my girl etc.
But again, my happiness is short-lived. My philly maid said she cannot get along with the Indo cos the Indo complained she's messy (well.. she is). And my indo maid said the philly maid doesn't like it when she pointed to her faults.
Then my philly maid said she wants to quit cos she cannot get along..


>>>>End of story.. I'm now sourcing for yet another maid.. Tell me.. What went wrong?
 
SQ,
I am actually thinking of a spiderman cake too! for EJ's bday la. think Bengawan solo has bah. those printed type.
 
Feel so much better after telling

SQ: I also wonder why.. Scolded my hubby for just taking in what his friend said without asking more questions. We found out the reason they want her to leave is cos she's quite good looking, and his wife and MIL is afraid something will happen between them..
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Plus, this is their first ever maid and they really have no basis for comparison.

QQ: #7 philly said she wants to quit. This is the 2nd time she said she wants to quit. First time was when she's here for 4 days. I was really hopping mad then. I mean, she was here for 4 days only and said she wanted to quit??!! Lots of friends tell me my agency got problem.
 
AAA,

Ha... maybe you should look for another agent. We are big house, 2 kids + 1 tod + 1 baby and 6 adults. We always tell the maids and agent helped to eliminate those who sounded at all unsure about working for us. But having 2 maids is always difficult unless their work is very clear cut, who do what and no overlaps. Anyway, your Philly maid is no good so might as well just let her go.
 
SQ: That's why I'm super, super stressed with maids..
Now I just pray that the Indo won't say she wants to quit also before the another new maid comes along..
I will go to another agency..
 
Mejo: You don't need your maid to handle the children right? But we need the maids to handle them. Our indoor space is abt 6,500 sq ft without including the outdoor area. Having said that, I don't require them to clean the 3rd floor (abt 2000 sq ft) everyday. I think it's super big for a family of 5. I even told hubby maybe we shd move to a smaller house, and then we won't have this much problem.

And yup, I've been truthful abt the job scope and that's why I suspect the 2 candidates din report back to the agency for medical check-ups.
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Yup, I'll look for anther agent.
 
AAA, change agent bah.

like that the #8 still there, still got a bit leftover. alamak..
but most of them wanna quit on you, prob your agent is not doing a good job.
 
QQ: I think so too.. Many friends came and tell us this too.. Sigh! But this agent is actually a friend of my SIL.. Actually the Indo I have right now is not from her agency.
 
aiyoh, i typed a long post for AAA then it disappeared! irritating!

AAA,
i wanted to say, just have one maid. I have a friend whose household is similar to yours.. 3 boys (6mths, 5yrs, 6yrs), big house (3story), and she did it with one maid. Her maid is very capable. But i think she pays her maid a lot also (another factor bah).. she is paying her $550 or $600 i think.

You can consider getting one maid, then hire part-time cleaner for chores like washing clothes, ironing, washing windows/toilets.. those that can do with twice a week cleaning.

SQ,
everyday EJ will tell me he is Spiderman. or Spiderboy. haha.
 
Autum: Really huh?? Just 1 maid? I'm afraid it'll be super tiring for her leh.. That's why we want to have 2. We pay our maids $450 each, regardless of whether they have ex or not, cos we want to be fair mah.. But this also caused some unhappiness among the maids.. *sigh*

And also with 2, there's insurance that if one wants to leave, then there's another one to tong3 ju3 first..
 
AAA,

My MIL said she prayed and prayed about the new maid. She is so scared and worried. So far, we've all been very happy with new maid who work fast, is very auto and good attitude.
 
spidermum,
u are right leh. one maid, if u pay her more also can.
but then now ayden still wakes up in the night, then ariel is coming soon. need to cook also?

probably 1 maid might not b enough?

Actually AAA, in msia, seldom ppl have two maids. 1 maid baokaliao. i am not sure about their standard, cause maid in msia can be quite cham too.
my mil commneted than my cl not good, dun do housework despite the house is small in singapore. but then i have diff view, i think it is ok to just take care of bb, me and food. cincai clean floor is ok. no need to clean windows and such.
for maid in msia, some of them can handle one big family with kids. i dunno how they do it.
probably the kids are trained not to wake up at night? then also everything do it themselves.
 
Mejo: I also prayed very hard and got my friends to pray for me.. Before I accepted the Indo, I asked the agent to bring her back to our place and tell my Philly to interact with her and see if she's acceptable to her. Cos I had told her that I wanted to find someone she can get along with too. And at the same time, I wanted the potential to take a look at the place and us first before committing herself to the job.

Still this happens..
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AAA,
initially i was surprised too, how come her 1maid can do it. But her circumstances a bit different cos now her 2 elder boys are bigger and much more independent. When her elder boys were smaller, they were staying in a smaller apartment.. (at that time also one maid). Then my friend decided to get a 2nd maid, and many problems came.. so in the end, just stuck to having one maid.

Her current maid, she even have time to sleep in the afternoon!
 
Autum: Sigh!!! Maybe I'll check with hubby if we want to ask this indo maid if she wants to take on the job single-handedly, and we increase her salary of course.. But hor, I can't be so eng liao.
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Will have to take care of Ariel myself leh.. Cannot lah.. I'm scared..
 
QQ: I think it's ok fort he CL to just take care of the NB, cook for the mum, take care of the mum.. Housework shdn't be part of her duties lah.. Else, very tiring leh.. Erm.. ok, maybe for households without maids, then the CL will do the washing of the NB clothes.
 
Plus, I don't think my hubby will agree.. Cos he'll think if I get stressed up, then I'll go stress him up too.. So to him, he'll say I shd relax and get help.
 
SQ: Dunno leh.. I've admitted I'm quite useless when it comes to handling children. I'm really no good.. And if I'm a maid, I won't be surprised I'll be one of those who'll abuse the children, cos I have no patience..
 
AAA,
ya, I was going to say, my friend is taking care of her infant boy herself (night duty). But my friend is also quite capable type (as in active type).. she is working as a property agent.. and in between her breastfeeding hours, she can go out and show clients property!

QQ,
i think if only have one maid, then must make provision for other things bah. or lower expectations on certain areas or send the children to CCC.. must think of many different options.
 
SQ, shh.. dun tell your CL la.
but i like her personally. i bochap mil's comment.
mil said cl should wash my clothes with hands, and babys also. i was like, hah?? i have washing machine and dryer le, must as well fully utilise it. i prefer cl to sit there and sing to tian then.
after her comment, my bil also dare not take in my cl. they found another one, recommended by the other side of the family. ended up, wah. disaster, the whole house was almost burnt even when there was no baby at home to take care of. scary. and the criteria was MUST do housework. i dare not recommend my CL sothat my CL wont be tortured with houseworks.
and mil said one day need to cook 5 meals for me. bf cannot take bread and milo. (i wsa so full with all the food so i had 3 meals a day + milo bread/cereal as snacks). haha!!!

AAA, i think u try new agency first. see how. if really cannot then hm.... ayden and anna big liao can live with one maid? and one partime?
 
QQ: Actually, I think when ayden goes to cc, things shd get better.. But 18mths is too young right? I would like to toilet trained him first before he starts cc..
 
AAA,

We'll need the maid to handle the kids soon. In fact, tomorrow! Cuz my SIL is going back to work. So MIL will need help. I don't remember how many sq feet is our house but there's 7 toilets and bathrooms and the maid is required to wash 6 of them everyday. She works really fast compared to the old one. Last time I can take a nap with YT and wake up then old maid is done with the room and toilet. The new one take 1/3 of the time. She even have time to help out with some gardening stuff ocassionally. She cleaned out the shoe cabinet without us asking her to do so. She wakes up at 4 am every morning even though we told her to wake at 530 on weekdays. She can't cook but she's learning and can at least help out with the preparation of the vegs and stuffs. When she's free, she will study her English textbook.

Anyway, we told agency to tell the maids that they are expected to handle the kids. We don't want to said no need, then when we need help, they will be unhappy. So, we always upfront say they need to help with the kids first. Of course, even so, the old maid rejected the idea when MIL said that she has to help with the kids when SIL goes back to work.
 
autum, i think AAA cannot live with 1 maid in the near term. next time maybe but now a bit hard.

AAA, just pray hard. and get a good maid, hopefully.
u believe in fengshui??? u need to bai3 one zhen4 to jio1 gui4 ren2 to your house. haha!! (if you dun believe it, just treat it as a joke ok?)

if u wan i tell u my story of gui4 ren2.
i din believe it earlier on too. but i did it out of desperation. it worked for me. but i know u wont believe the method de la.
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haha!!!
so u got to pray, praying also help de.
 


Hey mums.. thanks for the listening ears.. I felt so much better already.. I could have gone on silently if we had not received a letter from the MOM re frequent change in maids..
Even though we were expecting a letter to come after this while, I'm still upset by it.

I mean, I'm not the one who wanted to change the maids, the maids quit on us!

I drafted a long reply letter, together with the letters the maids wrote before their departure. I really wished the MOM will come and interview me and let me share our case to them, instead of just shooting out standard letters.
 

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