bliss_ling: Dun worry too much on the past.. =) Whoa, then not too bad, at least ur hb's ok with both boy or girl.. =)
Ya might wanna try to bring hb to ur side bah.. tis not to sow discord between mum and son or whatever.. but I find it truly hurting that the child's carrying on your surname and since MIL's so particular abt gender, she shld also recognise this traditional thinking that the child carried hb's surname and not mine, so she shld at least be happy tt she's got the only granddaughter (since SIL got 2 boys).. but MIL still penalises us and dun give a damn abt us just coz the girl's ours and not her precious daughter's aka my SIL..
So think my hb can also see the differences in treatment loh, but he abit bochap one.. but heng he dotes on our girl and he also got his eyes to see tt his own mum doesnt give a damn abt our girl but treated SIL's 2 sons as her precious, so I just told him frankly.. 'You must know tt now tt we are married, this is our own little home, our own little family and we must be committed to providing a good shelter and protection with stable foundation in order to grow our family and let our lil one grow, so ya's closest kin is us, i.e me as his wife and our kid.. coz the three of us form a family unit.. Filial piety is still needed but since MIL doesnt give a heck abt any of us, then we offer the min care tt she needs, wh is the only thg tt she cares abt, the monthly allowance tt hb gives her..only tt $$ stays in her heart and she'll only ask the other SIL to msg hb to give her the money.. so if tt's the case, nothing is what she gave to us, minimum is what we will give her back..
Maybe ya can let ur hb know if ur MIL's getting more and more overbearing bah, else v v xinku to bottle it all up.. Mummy may be dearest to ur hb but now tt he's a grown man, he needs to have his own thinking and he is the head of your household and has the responsibility to stand up for his wife and kid bah..
gd thg's so far my hb understands my reasoning that we form a family unit, his closest shld be us.. but I won't go too far and keep on criticizing MIL else hb'd think tt m nt thinking logically and tt m just biased against MIL.. not too gd too coz afterall she's still his Mum.. just remind him once in a while, in moderation, discuss with him logically and he'll be able to see the point, dun add personal feel inside..
I understand the feeling of being marginalised and there was once I was so sad that I can only draw on the consolation that my Mum also pref her granddaughter, i.e my child now... =p but hor, maybe coz my child's the only grandchild in my Mum's side bah.. haha..
Anw, am hoping to get #2 soon, so that in time to come, when my younger siblings all get married and have their children, their kids can have grandma's undivided attention and I can also shower them with the love tt my siblings give to my child currently.. coz by then, my child'd have grown up and they've alr had their share of love, attention and care alr.. =)