Support Group - Stillbirths
- Thread starter miracle_bb
- Start date
Mylollipopdays
Active Member
hi mummies
just a note to say the love gifts (white gold) has been transferred to Patsy. Am sure she'll thank you personally when she returns from Manila. How's everyone? This thread's been so quiet and I feel quite alone here...
just a note to say the love gifts (white gold) has been transferred to Patsy. Am sure she'll thank you personally when she returns from Manila. How's everyone? This thread's been so quiet and I feel quite alone here...
Hi Angie and Patsy,
do feel free to go into these weblinks:
http://hannahshopebook.com/aboutjenni.html
Above is a christian lady's blog how she over come IF, numerous M/Cs and unsuccessful adoption through God's plan
http://hannahsprayer.org/board/index.php?showforum=102
Above link is a christian community forum where these ladies share their stories just like us and how they overcome, be amaze the ups and downs, anger,frustration and miracles
http://www.hannah.org
God bless and take care,
the journey is not easy so let us hang on!
do feel free to go into these weblinks:
http://hannahshopebook.com/aboutjenni.html
Above is a christian lady's blog how she over come IF, numerous M/Cs and unsuccessful adoption through God's plan
http://hannahsprayer.org/board/index.php?showforum=102
Above link is a christian community forum where these ladies share their stories just like us and how they overcome, be amaze the ups and downs, anger,frustration and miracles
http://www.hannah.org
God bless and take care,
the journey is not easy so let us hang on!
Mylollipopdays
Active Member
Hi Happyger
thank you for your recommendations. Coincidentally, I have her book called 'Hannah's Hope'. Very inspiring indeed. I encourage all ladies here to get a copy too.
The Book - Hannah's Hope
thank you for your recommendations. Coincidentally, I have her book called 'Hannah's Hope'. Very inspiring indeed. I encourage all ladies here to get a copy too.
The Book - Hannah's Hope
superbunny
New Member
Hi everyone,
Haven't been posting here for a while.. guess today i was just missing my baby a lot. Hope that everyone has been doing well. It is the Xmas season and it has been a bit difficult for me.
Wanted to tell you gals that i am expecting again. It was not an easy start cos i had quite a bit of complications and had to be on bed rest. Was totally scared but thankfully things have stablised since. I am praying for a smooth pregancy and will be due in end April, within days of Gabriel's anniversary. Hopefully i wouldn't be a total emotional wreck then.
Let's catch up when Patsy is back in town
Haven't been posting here for a while.. guess today i was just missing my baby a lot. Hope that everyone has been doing well. It is the Xmas season and it has been a bit difficult for me.
Wanted to tell you gals that i am expecting again. It was not an easy start cos i had quite a bit of complications and had to be on bed rest. Was totally scared but thankfully things have stablised since. I am praying for a smooth pregancy and will be due in end April, within days of Gabriel's anniversary. Hopefully i wouldn't be a total emotional wreck then.
Let's catch up when Patsy is back in town
Mylollipopdays
Active Member
It's been a heart-wrenching year for most of us here in this thread. I wish 2008 would be a better year for all of us.
bbteng
Member
oh dear...feel sorry and sad to Patsy. I hv been away from the thread for some time...
Leaving the thread but yet thinking of my angels little Bryan & Benjemin... as tomorrow Jan 4th shd be my EDD for my twinnies...
Well...stay strong....all of you too!
Wishing all of us a good year to go!!!
Leaving the thread but yet thinking of my angels little Bryan & Benjemin... as tomorrow Jan 4th shd be my EDD for my twinnies...
Well...stay strong....all of you too!
Wishing all of us a good year to go!!!
superbunny
New Member
Hi everyone
Belated Happy New Year to all of you. Hope that everyone enjoyed their holiday season. Am keen for gathering.. how about the rest?
Belated Happy New Year to all of you. Hope that everyone enjoyed their holiday season. Am keen for gathering.. how about the rest?
Mylollipopdays
Active Member
<font color="ff6000">CHILDREN MEMORIAL 2008</font>
Hi everyone
Child Bereavement Support (www.cbss.sg) is organising their <font color="0000ff">2nd Children's Memorial on 1st March (Sat) at 5pm at the East Coast Park</font>.
It will be an informal, outdoor even open to all bereaved families and friends, where we come together in a beautiful setting to remember our beloved lost children with music, poetry and readings, and a mass balloon release. Our children's names will also be read aloud before we release the balloons together.
If you're interested to attend this meaningful memorial event, please PM me your email address so I can send you the details. We can also arrange to meet up there. Take care and lots of love.
Hi everyone
Child Bereavement Support (www.cbss.sg) is organising their <font color="0000ff">2nd Children's Memorial on 1st March (Sat) at 5pm at the East Coast Park</font>.
It will be an informal, outdoor even open to all bereaved families and friends, where we come together in a beautiful setting to remember our beloved lost children with music, poetry and readings, and a mass balloon release. Our children's names will also be read aloud before we release the balloons together.
If you're interested to attend this meaningful memorial event, please PM me your email address so I can send you the details. We can also arrange to meet up there. Take care and lots of love.
miracle_bb
Member
Hi,
How are you gals doing? Here is an article below.
A Mother’s Day Month of Remembrance
Online Candle-Lighting Campaign to Support First Candle
First Candle is pleased to announce a partnership with Memory-Of.com, the world’s largest online memorial web site, to generate funds that will help save babies’ lives. This Mother’s Day, and for the entire month of May, Memory-Of.com invites online users to light a virtual candle in honor of a child that has died. For every candle lit, $1 will be donated to First Candle.
In addition, to pay tribute to the unique bond between mother and child, Memory-Of.com will also invite visitors to the site to light a candle in memory of a mother, grandmother or godmother that has died. For candles lit in memory of a mother, $1 will be donated to Susan G. Komen for the Cure.
“Mother’s Day can be such a special time for many families. But for those who are coping with the loss of a mother, or a mother grieving for the loss of her child, it can be the most trying time of the healing process. We hope that with the Mother’s Day Month of Remembrance campaign we can honor and commemorate these women and children, not only by symbolically illuminating their legacies with online candle lightings, but also by giving the lasting gift of a donation to these causes that benefit so many mothers and children across the world,” said Lana Migliore, President of Memory-Of.com.
This year alone, more than 26,000 families in America will experience the death of a baby, more than 25,000 families will be devastated by stillbirth and more than 40,000 women will die from breast cancer.
First Candle sends strength and hope to all those struggling with the loss of a loved one . . . and special thanks to Memory-Of.com for the opportunity to make this Mother’s Day more than just flowers, chocolates and gifts . . . in honor of the powerful bond between mothers and their children.
For mothers who have lost children: http://remembering-our-angels.memory-of.com
How are you gals doing? Here is an article below.
A Mother’s Day Month of Remembrance
Online Candle-Lighting Campaign to Support First Candle
First Candle is pleased to announce a partnership with Memory-Of.com, the world’s largest online memorial web site, to generate funds that will help save babies’ lives. This Mother’s Day, and for the entire month of May, Memory-Of.com invites online users to light a virtual candle in honor of a child that has died. For every candle lit, $1 will be donated to First Candle.
In addition, to pay tribute to the unique bond between mother and child, Memory-Of.com will also invite visitors to the site to light a candle in memory of a mother, grandmother or godmother that has died. For candles lit in memory of a mother, $1 will be donated to Susan G. Komen for the Cure.
“Mother’s Day can be such a special time for many families. But for those who are coping with the loss of a mother, or a mother grieving for the loss of her child, it can be the most trying time of the healing process. We hope that with the Mother’s Day Month of Remembrance campaign we can honor and commemorate these women and children, not only by symbolically illuminating their legacies with online candle lightings, but also by giving the lasting gift of a donation to these causes that benefit so many mothers and children across the world,” said Lana Migliore, President of Memory-Of.com.
This year alone, more than 26,000 families in America will experience the death of a baby, more than 25,000 families will be devastated by stillbirth and more than 40,000 women will die from breast cancer.
First Candle sends strength and hope to all those struggling with the loss of a loved one . . . and special thanks to Memory-Of.com for the opportunity to make this Mother’s Day more than just flowers, chocolates and gifts . . . in honor of the powerful bond between mothers and their children.
For mothers who have lost children: http://remembering-our-angels.memory-of.com
miracle_bb
Member
Hi VAC,
I tried to msg you but you did not enable your PM. I have a blood clotting disorder called Protein S deficiency causing me to lose 2 babies at 35 weeks. If you require more information or wish to get in touch with me, you just need to PM me.
I tried to msg you but you did not enable your PM. I have a blood clotting disorder called Protein S deficiency causing me to lose 2 babies at 35 weeks. If you require more information or wish to get in touch with me, you just need to PM me.
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi,
Just wondering if this thread is still active? I've lost my little minnie last week, gynae still unable to give me a reason.. the thought of her.. breaks my heart..
Just wondering if this thread is still active? I've lost my little minnie last week, gynae still unable to give me a reason.. the thought of her.. breaks my heart..
jasmum
Member
my story:
i had 2 stillbirth (Rachel)12 July '06 & (Rebekkah)23 Jan '08. both girls left me at 25wks
both the autopsy reports showed "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" - meaning evidence of a hypercoiled umbilical cord - cord's blood vessels were knotted, coiled and clotted that prevented blood and oxygen flowing to the baby as she grows and also both the babies' side of the placenta showed blood clots.
my cases were brought up to a panel of doctors (from RH) and together with the pathology from KKH - the same guy who did both my autopsy reports, investigated and they found out to-date... there hasn't been any 'known reported' cases about / on this diagnose "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happening the 2nd time... in the world wide research also it seems.
my doctors had contacted 2 other overseas doctors - USA / UK who had written on such diagnose and similarly, there are not much findings and caused, still... and no 2nd time occurrence had ever happened or been reported...
i was already put on all the necessary precaution on this 2nd pregnancy taking aspirin as blood thinner but yet... by the 25wk... i lost my baby again without knowing or showing any symptom just passed-on.
i passed all my screening tests and baby was growing and developing well, good in growth and size, etc... but still by the 25wk... *sigh*
i had to deliver baby out (once again) and it was indeed the most heart-breaking moment a "supposed-mum-to-be" has to go through. i went through all sort of further screenings, tests and spending so much of $$ again and even hubby did some blood test too, so that we could try and know and find a 'closure'... but it's still unknown... as we passed all the 'known' tests and results showed we are good and ok.
*sigh*
the date of my 1st stillborn is approaching and i am emotionally wracked...
we are not giving up so will plan to TTC again... but my cycles are still not 'settled' yet... *sigh*
i am fit and well in fact my doctors have already started me on aspirin & folic. we are leaving / living this by Faith...
i do pray and hope for the women here will be blessed 1 day to have that long-for crying baby in their arms...
thank you for reading and i wish all of you well.
i had 2 stillbirth (Rachel)12 July '06 & (Rebekkah)23 Jan '08. both girls left me at 25wks
both the autopsy reports showed "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" - meaning evidence of a hypercoiled umbilical cord - cord's blood vessels were knotted, coiled and clotted that prevented blood and oxygen flowing to the baby as she grows and also both the babies' side of the placenta showed blood clots.
my cases were brought up to a panel of doctors (from RH) and together with the pathology from KKH - the same guy who did both my autopsy reports, investigated and they found out to-date... there hasn't been any 'known reported' cases about / on this diagnose "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happening the 2nd time... in the world wide research also it seems.
my doctors had contacted 2 other overseas doctors - USA / UK who had written on such diagnose and similarly, there are not much findings and caused, still... and no 2nd time occurrence had ever happened or been reported...
i was already put on all the necessary precaution on this 2nd pregnancy taking aspirin as blood thinner but yet... by the 25wk... i lost my baby again without knowing or showing any symptom just passed-on.
i passed all my screening tests and baby was growing and developing well, good in growth and size, etc... but still by the 25wk... *sigh*
i had to deliver baby out (once again) and it was indeed the most heart-breaking moment a "supposed-mum-to-be" has to go through. i went through all sort of further screenings, tests and spending so much of $$ again and even hubby did some blood test too, so that we could try and know and find a 'closure'... but it's still unknown... as we passed all the 'known' tests and results showed we are good and ok.
*sigh*
the date of my 1st stillborn is approaching and i am emotionally wracked...
we are not giving up so will plan to TTC again... but my cycles are still not 'settled' yet... *sigh*
i am fit and well in fact my doctors have already started me on aspirin & folic. we are leaving / living this by Faith...
i do pray and hope for the women here will be blessed 1 day to have that long-for crying baby in their arms...
thank you for reading and i wish all of you well.
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi jasmum,
My heart goes out to you when i read your post. we are here for you whenever u need a listening ear. Am with you..
I lost my girl recently..stillbirth at 32 weeks on june 22. Her movements stopped one day..she has stopped breathing suddenly with no contractions, water bag burst or bleeding, etc.till date, my gynae is still unable to give me a reason.. same as your 2 lovely girls, she is a chubby, healthy baby. I can't believe it just happened to me..I've also passed all the tests, even glucose test went well..have her cremated and released her ashes into the sea..
Is your autopsy results done on the placenta? i opt out the autopsy on baby (can't bear to cut her up) since my hubby's family insisted on cremation i/o burial that was heart breaking for me.. histopathology report is okie.. i wonder if there is any other further test to detect the cause..
i believed we would be blessed with crying babies in our hands soon. Let's pray and look forward to that day.
My heart goes out to you when i read your post. we are here for you whenever u need a listening ear. Am with you..
I lost my girl recently..stillbirth at 32 weeks on june 22. Her movements stopped one day..she has stopped breathing suddenly with no contractions, water bag burst or bleeding, etc.till date, my gynae is still unable to give me a reason.. same as your 2 lovely girls, she is a chubby, healthy baby. I can't believe it just happened to me..I've also passed all the tests, even glucose test went well..have her cremated and released her ashes into the sea..
Is your autopsy results done on the placenta? i opt out the autopsy on baby (can't bear to cut her up) since my hubby's family insisted on cremation i/o burial that was heart breaking for me.. histopathology report is okie.. i wonder if there is any other further test to detect the cause..
i believed we would be blessed with crying babies in our hands soon. Let's pray and look forward to that day.
jasmum
Member
sweetie (sweetieminnie),
thank you for the lovely kind words... indeed we are all here for eachother... and personally, i feel that only people like us, who have gone through such an ordeal will know how to keep each other in comfort... <hugs>
yes, the autopsy was done on both times; baby and placenta, and yet - unfounding...
similar to you, we did cremated and released their ashes into the sea at changi.
coming sunday, will be making a trip there to throw stalks of flowers... it feels good for me... i guess. i actually thought of getting helium ballons... to release it there but didn't want to make it into an "attraction" thingy...
at times, it is tough to 'move-on', i know...
it was my doc who told my hubby to allow to have the autopsy done, as i wasn't in a position to 'think / decide' then... and i am thankful he did. at least i know the report mentioned it's a "thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" and it is shown that it is not at all detectable too... so it's a way of 'closure' for hubby & i.
do take good care of yourself. <hugs>
thank you for the lovely kind words... indeed we are all here for eachother... and personally, i feel that only people like us, who have gone through such an ordeal will know how to keep each other in comfort... <hugs>
yes, the autopsy was done on both times; baby and placenta, and yet - unfounding...
similar to you, we did cremated and released their ashes into the sea at changi.
coming sunday, will be making a trip there to throw stalks of flowers... it feels good for me... i guess. i actually thought of getting helium ballons... to release it there but didn't want to make it into an "attraction" thingy...
at times, it is tough to 'move-on', i know...
it was my doc who told my hubby to allow to have the autopsy done, as i wasn't in a position to 'think / decide' then... and i am thankful he did. at least i know the report mentioned it's a "thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" and it is shown that it is not at all detectable too... so it's a way of 'closure' for hubby & i.
do take good care of yourself. <hugs>
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi Jasmum,
i intend to buy her a toy boat with some flowers for my girl on her EDD this coming Aug.. i've thot of helium ballon too but have no idea where to purchase it..her ashes were released at mandai..i concur..it's only those who have gone through such rough patch, will know how to keep each other in comfort. There are some SOPs qns which i think it would just intensified my pain i/o of minimising my loss: you're still young, can attempt to conceive again.everything happens for a reason(what reason when bb is so healthy? only god knows).maybe it's for the best(which i don't understand how is it best when everything is so well?)old folks saying: she doesn't want to be your child..no fate (is there something wrong with me being a mother?)..some can even tell me their friends experienced m/c b4..but the intensity of pain is diff..
we can only hug n comfort one another here who knows best what we've gone through the darkest moment in our life..it's so hard to move on when pple keep qn us..and when we see so many bb from our relatives/friends..
is the 'hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy' found on the placenta/umbilical cord or bb? sorry for asking such detailed qns..as i would also like a 'closure' too..
i intend to buy her a toy boat with some flowers for my girl on her EDD this coming Aug.. i've thot of helium ballon too but have no idea where to purchase it..her ashes were released at mandai..i concur..it's only those who have gone through such rough patch, will know how to keep each other in comfort. There are some SOPs qns which i think it would just intensified my pain i/o of minimising my loss: you're still young, can attempt to conceive again.everything happens for a reason(what reason when bb is so healthy? only god knows).maybe it's for the best(which i don't understand how is it best when everything is so well?)old folks saying: she doesn't want to be your child..no fate (is there something wrong with me being a mother?)..some can even tell me their friends experienced m/c b4..but the intensity of pain is diff..
we can only hug n comfort one another here who knows best what we've gone through the darkest moment in our life..it's so hard to move on when pple keep qn us..and when we see so many bb from our relatives/friends..
is the 'hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy' found on the placenta/umbilical cord or bb? sorry for asking such detailed qns..as i would also like a 'closure' too..
jasmum
Member
sweetie (sweetieminnie),
hey that's a nice ideal to buy a toy boat
helium ballon can be bought at some florist shops and party stuffs shops like "party r us" they are at centrepoint / valley point.
yesterday, before lunch, was at changi just for that quiet quick 10mins.
and thereafter, so funny bumped into 1 of my obgny at a shopping mall !! haaa...
me not young.. i am 37 already *sigh* and i do have an 8yr son...
doctors also find it strange as when i had my son 8yrs ago, everything was smooth and well, in fact back then, i was still working and had to do alot of travelling up till 5mths preg. it's really so "unexplainable"... when the present lifestyle is so 'stress-free' yet...
'hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy' found in the umbilical cord. the cord is made up a main artery and many blood vessels... and both Rachel & Rebekkah had about 60% blood clots and their cords were knotted and coiled a few rounds... if i recalled correctly, about 6x coiled.
both girls - they are well formed and normal, no signs of blood clots found within them. so it's their umbilical cord & the placenta (baby side) had those blood clots...
well, honestly, i know no amount of words will ever make us feel any better or inmproved. some days are very easy to get by, but there are days that one will just refuse to get out of bed... i know that.
i am not at all bothered by what people want to say, or even judge... to me by Faith - someone's (an american lady's) kind words has touched me and this is what she said:
" the coming Kingdom of Heaven is so big and Abba Father needs the purest angels to prepare the way for HIS coming people..."
take care
hey that's a nice ideal to buy a toy boat
helium ballon can be bought at some florist shops and party stuffs shops like "party r us" they are at centrepoint / valley point.
yesterday, before lunch, was at changi just for that quiet quick 10mins.
and thereafter, so funny bumped into 1 of my obgny at a shopping mall !! haaa...
me not young.. i am 37 already *sigh* and i do have an 8yr son...
doctors also find it strange as when i had my son 8yrs ago, everything was smooth and well, in fact back then, i was still working and had to do alot of travelling up till 5mths preg. it's really so "unexplainable"... when the present lifestyle is so 'stress-free' yet...
'hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy' found in the umbilical cord. the cord is made up a main artery and many blood vessels... and both Rachel & Rebekkah had about 60% blood clots and their cords were knotted and coiled a few rounds... if i recalled correctly, about 6x coiled.
both girls - they are well formed and normal, no signs of blood clots found within them. so it's their umbilical cord & the placenta (baby side) had those blood clots...
well, honestly, i know no amount of words will ever make us feel any better or inmproved. some days are very easy to get by, but there are days that one will just refuse to get out of bed... i know that.
i am not at all bothered by what people want to say, or even judge... to me by Faith - someone's (an american lady's) kind words has touched me and this is what she said:
" the coming Kingdom of Heaven is so big and Abba Father needs the purest angels to prepare the way for HIS coming people..."
take care
Mylollipopdays
Active Member
Hi jasmum and sweetie,
if you read my blog, you'll realised I've lost 3 bbs to premature births too. Just crossed my bb's 1st anniversary last month. Feel free to write and pour out your grief here for other couples who have not witnessed and experienced the deaths of their bbs will NEVER understand the depths of pain we go through. We're here to comfort and inspire one another.
if you read my blog, you'll realised I've lost 3 bbs to premature births too. Just crossed my bb's 1st anniversary last month. Feel free to write and pour out your grief here for other couples who have not witnessed and experienced the deaths of their bbs will NEVER understand the depths of pain we go through. We're here to comfort and inspire one another.
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi jasmum
went for a 2nd follow-up. enquired if my case is linked to blood clot issues (thrombophilia and the hyper coiled), she commented that my blood count test is normal.placenta and umbilical cord found no blood clots and stressed that she really can't give me any reason that caused my bb to stop breathing. *sigh* i guess there would not be a 'closure' and remained as a mystery.
Am touched by the amercian lady's kind words...felt more comfort after reading that..
Hi angel,
read your blog when i first found out this thread previously.Honestly, i was tearing bitterly while reading..it was so heart-breaking.. u r a very courageous gal.. at times, i would feel that life is so unfair..
went for a 2nd follow-up. enquired if my case is linked to blood clot issues (thrombophilia and the hyper coiled), she commented that my blood count test is normal.placenta and umbilical cord found no blood clots and stressed that she really can't give me any reason that caused my bb to stop breathing. *sigh* i guess there would not be a 'closure' and remained as a mystery.
Am touched by the amercian lady's kind words...felt more comfort after reading that..
Hi angel,
read your blog when i first found out this thread previously.Honestly, i was tearing bitterly while reading..it was so heart-breaking.. u r a very courageous gal.. at times, i would feel that life is so unfair..
superbunny
New Member
Hi jasmum and sweetie..
Sorry to hear of your loss..like angel said we are here to share and comfort each other. Time will heal the wounds.
Sorry to hear of your loss..like angel said we are here to share and comfort each other. Time will heal the wounds.
Hi Jasmum,
I had a stillbirth in 2005 due to cord accident, my gal was healthy and good weight, just one day she stopped kicking and hb stoppedwhen I went to do scan the next day...
When I was induced, found out there is one knot at the umbilical cord and the cord twisted itself around then near my gal's bellybutton the cord become very thin and stretched, not the normal thickness. I wonder was it my gal was very active kicking inside and cause the cord to be knot n twisted itself?
I am so sorry to hear u lost 2 gals due to the same reason, does ur gynae say will this be a permanent problem n anyway prevent form occuring of this hyper colied cord problem?
I had a stillbirth in 2005 due to cord accident, my gal was healthy and good weight, just one day she stopped kicking and hb stoppedwhen I went to do scan the next day...
When I was induced, found out there is one knot at the umbilical cord and the cord twisted itself around then near my gal's bellybutton the cord become very thin and stretched, not the normal thickness. I wonder was it my gal was very active kicking inside and cause the cord to be knot n twisted itself?
I am so sorry to hear u lost 2 gals due to the same reason, does ur gynae say will this be a permanent problem n anyway prevent form occuring of this hyper colied cord problem?
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi Steph,
Thank you.. am glad i've found this thread where i could pour all my sorrows, rather to those who are not in our shoes, will never fully understand..
Hi happerger,
My gynae found the cord near to my bb's belly button was thinner too, but no twist was found. the histopathology of the placenta showed 3 normal blood vessels. She mentioned there was a case previously, where the cord (near the belly button) was very thin, to the extend where oxygen might have cut off. Is your gynae from Mt.E too?
Thank you.. am glad i've found this thread where i could pour all my sorrows, rather to those who are not in our shoes, will never fully understand..
Hi happerger,
My gynae found the cord near to my bb's belly button was thinner too, but no twist was found. the histopathology of the placenta showed 3 normal blood vessels. She mentioned there was a case previously, where the cord (near the belly button) was very thin, to the extend where oxygen might have cut off. Is your gynae from Mt.E too?
sweetieminnie
Member
sorry, typo error.. happyger(i/o) happerger..
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi happyger,
I hope i could find a 'closure' (reason) soon. i do have phobia now as this is my 1st bb..
I hope i could find a 'closure' (reason) soon. i do have phobia now as this is my 1st bb..
superbunny
New Member
Hi sweetie..
You are most welcome.. when you mentioned that you have a phobia cos its ur 1st bb, i totally understand cos i also lost my firstborn. But have hope and do not give up okie?
You are most welcome.. when you mentioned that you have a phobia cos its ur 1st bb, i totally understand cos i also lost my firstborn. But have hope and do not give up okie?
jasmum
Member
hello dearies,
happyger (val1977),
i was given blood-thinner for the 2nd Preg. that is already the precaution step to take... and from the FTS - scan at 20-22weeks (i had mine done twice as dr's advise) and can see all the blood flow was ok and normal... baby's growth todate.
so it's really very "unexplainable" and if i were to be blessed again - both of my obgny - at RH; Joan Thong & Tony Tan would like for me a "case-study"... they'll be also consulting with the USA / UK docs it seems...
well... we are not trying as yet, but maybe soon lah...
just want to look forward to some relax time - coming national day, going to a beach resort nearby to 're-charge' haaa !!!
ohh... and of course boy or gal they don't matter !!!
it'll be a fruitful blessing to be able to have a healthy baby in your arms to love and to grow...
i am sure all the ladies here feel the same
indeed, let's as much try to look up and slowing take that step forward and have Faith again.
blessings <hugs>
happyger (val1977),
i was given blood-thinner for the 2nd Preg. that is already the precaution step to take... and from the FTS - scan at 20-22weeks (i had mine done twice as dr's advise) and can see all the blood flow was ok and normal... baby's growth todate.
so it's really very "unexplainable" and if i were to be blessed again - both of my obgny - at RH; Joan Thong & Tony Tan would like for me a "case-study"... they'll be also consulting with the USA / UK docs it seems...
well... we are not trying as yet, but maybe soon lah...
ohh... and of course boy or gal they don't matter !!!
i am sure all the ladies here feel the same
indeed, let's as much try to look up and slowing take that step forward and have Faith again.
blessings <hugs>
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi steph,
i've read about your firstborn. It have been an excruciating period for you...<hugs>
I do not know when would i walk out of this..at times, tears would roll down uncontrollably.. perhaps the pain is still raw..
i've read about your firstborn. It have been an excruciating period for you...<hugs>
I do not know when would i walk out of this..at times, tears would roll down uncontrollably.. perhaps the pain is still raw..
jasmum
Member
sweetie (sweetieminnie),
<hugs>
i know for sure, what we have gone thru' will always stay within our hearts... i know i will never forget or overcome the losses... [even though i know my gals are not 'lost' heee...]
some days, it's really tough, especially when we are surrounded with friends and their happy bouncing babies - right... *sigh*
it's painful and tough... i know... but we just have to be strong - brace-up, chin-up and move on slowly. Don't try to FORGET your baby, b'cos the fact is you won't...
moving ahead, doesn't mean we should FORGET, just that we have to try and put that 'pain' deep in our hearts and let go s-l-o-w-l-y.
after we lost Rachel in '06 - we managed to go on a short holiday to Perth and there, by chance i saw a little angel brouch that had a name - Rachel
i bought that and safe keep it now.
i am waiting for another Australia trip (if we do go again) i hope to get hold of one with the name Rebekkah, of course
as i can't seems to find it else where...
try to get a distraction - a new hobby... it could help
there are also some books that has helped me [somehow a little here and there]...
they are from Christian writers;
"I'll hold you in Heaven" - Jack Hayford
"Emily a child in Heaven" - Deborah Lycett
"Empty arms" - Pam Vredevelt
"God's Plan for Pregnancy" - Nerida Walker
The books are alright to read - 'painful/teary' in the beginning as the writers shared their personal losses... but their outcome - is a joyful, hopeful and v.encouraging !!
2 other medical base books:
"How to prevent miscarriage & other crises of pregnancy" - Stefan Semchyshyn and Carol Colman
"Trying again" - Ann Douglas and John R. Sussman
These are just good books to read for understand and knowledge but like all books have an open heart/mind when you read them.
BUT please don't fall into blaming yourself if you by chance come upon certain issues that you may not have rendered while being pregnant...
have Faith my dear... it is hard i know... but do try... <hugs>
<hugs>
i know for sure, what we have gone thru' will always stay within our hearts... i know i will never forget or overcome the losses... [even though i know my gals are not 'lost' heee...]
some days, it's really tough, especially when we are surrounded with friends and their happy bouncing babies - right... *sigh*
it's painful and tough... i know... but we just have to be strong - brace-up, chin-up and move on slowly. Don't try to FORGET your baby, b'cos the fact is you won't...
moving ahead, doesn't mean we should FORGET, just that we have to try and put that 'pain' deep in our hearts and let go s-l-o-w-l-y.
after we lost Rachel in '06 - we managed to go on a short holiday to Perth and there, by chance i saw a little angel brouch that had a name - Rachel
i am waiting for another Australia trip (if we do go again) i hope to get hold of one with the name Rebekkah, of course
try to get a distraction - a new hobby... it could help
there are also some books that has helped me [somehow a little here and there]...
they are from Christian writers;
"I'll hold you in Heaven" - Jack Hayford
"Emily a child in Heaven" - Deborah Lycett
"Empty arms" - Pam Vredevelt
"God's Plan for Pregnancy" - Nerida Walker
The books are alright to read - 'painful/teary' in the beginning as the writers shared their personal losses... but their outcome - is a joyful, hopeful and v.encouraging !!
2 other medical base books:
"How to prevent miscarriage & other crises of pregnancy" - Stefan Semchyshyn and Carol Colman
"Trying again" - Ann Douglas and John R. Sussman
These are just good books to read for understand and knowledge but like all books have an open heart/mind when you read them.
BUT please don't fall into blaming yourself if you by chance come upon certain issues that you may not have rendered while being pregnant...
have Faith my dear... it is hard i know... but do try... <hugs>
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi Jasmum,
Thank you for the encouragement.
Totally concur that it's so tough and painful to see our friends/relatives who are blessed with 'crying babies'. Am happy for them, at the same time, it reminds me of my baby.. I just got to smile while my heart is bleeding away. it's so harsh to face reality.. though am trying n struggling.
planning to go for a short break.. i need to get away from all these..
Thank you for the encouragement.
planning to go for a short break.. i need to get away from all these..
Jasmum, thks for ur reply, ya gender dosent matter
so long we carry to fullterm and hold our dear babies in our arms!
Hey I have this book:"God's Plan for Pregnancy" - Nerida Walker
It is really a powerful book and bless my very close gf, brings me thru my darkest moment in my life to hopes and faith frm God!
The author is coming to spore in Nov btw for seminar, perhaps you can register and seek healing, meetup the author personally!
I even join their WIF (women in faith) online support group, it is very encouraging!!
so long we carry to fullterm and hold our dear babies in our arms!
Hey I have this book:"God's Plan for Pregnancy" - Nerida Walker
It is really a powerful book and bless my very close gf, brings me thru my darkest moment in my life to hopes and faith frm God!
The author is coming to spore in Nov btw for seminar, perhaps you can register and seek healing, meetup the author personally!
I even join their WIF (women in faith) online support group, it is very encouraging!!
Hi gals
New to this thread. Have been on the Christian IVF mums or mums-to-be thread. I had an ectopic pregnancy instead @ 6 weeks and now had my left fallopian tube removed. I still wonder why.
Happyger - can I get the book "God's Plan fro Pregnancy" from Mt Zion christian bookshop @ Raffles Place???
New to this thread. Have been on the Christian IVF mums or mums-to-be thread. I had an ectopic pregnancy instead @ 6 weeks and now had my left fallopian tube removed. I still wonder why.
Happyger - can I get the book "God's Plan fro Pregnancy" from Mt Zion christian bookshop @ Raffles Place???
jasmum
Member
Mricky,
sorry to hear of what had happened... pray that you are recovering well in HIS Almighty Grace.
fyi, i had a hard time looking for the book "God's Plan fro Pregnancy" in s'pore... in the end, a friend in Auz got it for me, as the author is an Ozzy lady.
you can try looking for it at the Rock (at suntec), there's a lil' bookshop there that may have her book.
yes, she's expected to come to s'pore:
Wednesday 5th November 2008
Thursday 6th November 2008
New Creation Church
Rock Auditorium
3 Temasek Boulevard, Suntec City Mall,
#06-001, Singapore
www.newcreation.org.sg
Time: Evening TBA
Email: TBA
but details still not confirmed.
http://www.newlifeministries.com.au/support/conference/singapore/singapore.html
take care.
sorry to hear of what had happened... pray that you are recovering well in HIS Almighty Grace.
fyi, i had a hard time looking for the book "God's Plan fro Pregnancy" in s'pore... in the end, a friend in Auz got it for me, as the author is an Ozzy lady.
you can try looking for it at the Rock (at suntec), there's a lil' bookshop there that may have her book.
yes, she's expected to come to s'pore:
Wednesday 5th November 2008
Thursday 6th November 2008
New Creation Church
Rock Auditorium
3 Temasek Boulevard, Suntec City Mall,
#06-001, Singapore
www.newcreation.org.sg
Time: Evening TBA
Email: TBA
but details still not confirmed.
http://www.newlifeministries.com.au/support/conference/singapore/singapore.html
take care.
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi ladies,
This is the month of 'roller coaster' emotions for me..her edd month..going down to the beach next wk..still searching for a nice toy boat, will also buy some flowers and helium balloon. (wonder if it's considered as littering?)
Hi Mricky,
We are with you..i can understand when u wondered why. all of us have endless qns of why it happened and eventually could not obtained any answers. it's okie, take your time slowly..towards hope and faith.
(which am still learning to..)
Jasmum recommended some very good readings. I've completed '"Empty arms" - Pam Vredevelt '. It's very encouraging and narrates some of my feelings. Am still searching for 'God's plan for pregnancy'. Kinokuniya, borders and tecman(largest christian bookstore in sg) do not carry it. But i've found this website: http://www.ichristian.com.au/product_details2007.php?id=8792 if u want to get it online from aust.
This is the month of 'roller coaster' emotions for me..her edd month..going down to the beach next wk..still searching for a nice toy boat, will also buy some flowers and helium balloon. (wonder if it's considered as littering?)
Hi Mricky,
We are with you..i can understand when u wondered why. all of us have endless qns of why it happened and eventually could not obtained any answers. it's okie, take your time slowly..towards hope and faith.
Jasmum recommended some very good readings. I've completed '"Empty arms" - Pam Vredevelt '. It's very encouraging and narrates some of my feelings. Am still searching for 'God's plan for pregnancy'. Kinokuniya, borders and tecman(largest christian bookstore in sg) do not carry it. But i've found this website: http://www.ichristian.com.au/product_details2007.php?id=8792 if u want to get it online from aust.
sweetieminnie
Member
Hi gals,
this is really a tough month for me..am emotionally wrecked.. went to 'guang ming shan' for my baby girl reincarnation in which my dad has registered. there are few regrets in my life: I didn't manage to insist on burial i/o cremation (which i've no control over it) and to send her off (was forbided).I felt so lost that i've no control on what to do with my baby girl and there is no place to for me to grieve.. My eyes were brimming with tears the moment i saw her name and the tap just couldn't stop..I felt some peace and it eases bit of my regrets(though am a free thinker). I guess i'll have to bury the remaining regrets for the entire life.
Hi Jasmum,
Thank you for recommending those really good readings. It really helps me alot. As i've no friends/relatives with the same loss..am alone, with no one to pour out my grievances,the hurts and pain, which they couldn't really understand..the books seems to be specially written for me, at least.. all my feelings, regrets, etc. I could only seek solace in books..
this is really a tough month for me..am emotionally wrecked.. went to 'guang ming shan' for my baby girl reincarnation in which my dad has registered. there are few regrets in my life: I didn't manage to insist on burial i/o cremation (which i've no control over it) and to send her off (was forbided).I felt so lost that i've no control on what to do with my baby girl and there is no place to for me to grieve.. My eyes were brimming with tears the moment i saw her name and the tap just couldn't stop..I felt some peace and it eases bit of my regrets(though am a free thinker). I guess i'll have to bury the remaining regrets for the entire life.
Hi Jasmum,
Thank you for recommending those really good readings. It really helps me alot. As i've no friends/relatives with the same loss..am alone, with no one to pour out my grievances,the hurts and pain, which they couldn't really understand..the books seems to be specially written for me, at least.. all my feelings, regrets, etc. I could only seek solace in books..
jasmum
Member
sweetie (sweetieminnie),
<hugs>
don't regret... it's all that you have went thru', been thru'; that makes you who you are...
no one's life is any perfect... we all go thru' trials and lots of errors in life, so don't have any expectations and "IF" questions...
those don't work here... as we all know the "IF" really don't matter at all... and NO ONE can say and tell you so.
the books helped alot for me too... b'cos no matter what, only you can feel and understanding those words when facing / reading them.
some chapters are hard to read and accept but in time, you will realised it's the truth in some form.
slowly, focus and re-direct things to get yourself up & going when you feel you are ready... but like i have mentioned before, there will be those days too, that you can't even get-out of bed... don't deny yourself from those days. just accept,lasy in bed a little more time and slowly, you will feel better.
maybe you could do a scrapbook
- make copies of the scan pics, and paste whatever that was relate to her during those months that she was with you... doctor's bill, receipt, etc...
- write down personal notes, pen down your farewell, your feelings, etc...
then when it's all done... gift wrap the book and maybe burn it or safe keep it at the back end of your cupboard.
doing this, its part of closure and could help...
do take care my dearie... and don't give up... know that up there, a little angel is looking at you always.
Bless you peace and serenity, as you take your daily steps to do what you need to do and move on. <hugs>
<hugs>
don't regret... it's all that you have went thru', been thru'; that makes you who you are...
no one's life is any perfect... we all go thru' trials and lots of errors in life, so don't have any expectations and "IF" questions...
those don't work here... as we all know the "IF" really don't matter at all... and NO ONE can say and tell you so.
the books helped alot for me too... b'cos no matter what, only you can feel and understanding those words when facing / reading them.
some chapters are hard to read and accept but in time, you will realised it's the truth in some form.
slowly, focus and re-direct things to get yourself up & going when you feel you are ready... but like i have mentioned before, there will be those days too, that you can't even get-out of bed... don't deny yourself from those days. just accept,lasy in bed a little more time and slowly, you will feel better.
maybe you could do a scrapbook
- make copies of the scan pics, and paste whatever that was relate to her during those months that she was with you... doctor's bill, receipt, etc...
- write down personal notes, pen down your farewell, your feelings, etc...
then when it's all done... gift wrap the book and maybe burn it or safe keep it at the back end of your cupboard.
doing this, its part of closure and could help...
do take care my dearie... and don't give up... know that up there, a little angel is looking at you always.
Bless you peace and serenity, as you take your daily steps to do what you need to do and move on. <hugs>
sweetieminnie
Member
Jasmum,
I went to the beach last sunday. it's was her 'edd', bought her a beautiful toyboat, a balloon, some flowers + a family of 3 duckies. i brought a couple of precious thots figurines, as a remembrance of my baby girl. i missed her lots..
well-meaning relatives/friends would try to console me..wanting me to get back on track asap, do not cry, try to forget, take charge of my health 1st, they are able to empathize as they are mothers too..But they are mothers who are blessed with babies..they could never attain nor understand our level of pain. whenever am confronted with these, i do not know how to express my feelings to them, they would go on and on..n could even tell me i can try in another 3 to 6 mths time..they meant well..but it really hurts..
No one tells me it's okie to cry, take your time to grieve, move on when you are ready, it's okie to think of her, am on all ears..
Am really glad i came to know you gals n this support group thread. i will try to do up my scrapbook soon
I went to the beach last sunday. it's was her 'edd', bought her a beautiful toyboat, a balloon, some flowers + a family of 3 duckies. i brought a couple of precious thots figurines, as a remembrance of my baby girl. i missed her lots..
well-meaning relatives/friends would try to console me..wanting me to get back on track asap, do not cry, try to forget, take charge of my health 1st, they are able to empathize as they are mothers too..But they are mothers who are blessed with babies..they could never attain nor understand our level of pain. whenever am confronted with these, i do not know how to express my feelings to them, they would go on and on..n could even tell me i can try in another 3 to 6 mths time..they meant well..but it really hurts..
No one tells me it's okie to cry, take your time to grieve, move on when you are ready, it's okie to think of her, am on all ears..
Am really glad i came to know you gals n this support group thread. i will try to do up my scrapbook soon
sweetieminnie
Member
the books are really good.. i wish they could read them, as most of my feelings/thoughts are penned inside. After reading, i have a better understanding on why my gynae suggest all those.. she asked for natural contractions, vaginal birth rather the c-sect, w/o epidural, have i thought of which method of cremation..do i want to see my baby, take a photo of her.. i guess she understands as she has been through it before..all these are explain in the books. i actually felt much consoled n at peace after the readings..perhpas i thought am not the only 1 who have those thoughts/feelings..
Hello jasmum,
Sorry for ur loss.I lost my baby on 30Jul (very recently) & currently doing my confinement.I feel so stupid that it has to be done,but for the sake of strengthening my body (i m planning to try quite soon),i'm putting myself thru' this.
I had the same diagnosis as u.Thrombotic fetal vasculopathy.This is my 1st pregnancy.I'm free of risk factor,27 y.o.Hubby is 29 when i conceived.
the morn it all happened,i was so engrossed in getting hubby off to work on time,me getting to work on time,i totally forgot abt baby.maybe coz i didn't expect this to happen.I was so engrossed the whole day with work that i didn't even realise that baby not moving until i had dinner with my mum & she asked me abt the baby.U know,i'm so close yet so far.that week was the beginning of the 29th wk.i had no symptoms.no contractions,bleeding etc.i could even drive myself to the hospital.
this whole period has been a blur.hubby seem to be able to move on very quickly.& u know,i want to punch those ppl who tell me,"it's ok,u're still young,u can try again."i don't know if it's hurting so much coz i had so much plans for this expected daughter.everything has been bought.i juz need the baby.we had planned wat to name her,i've even planned the cute clothes (all bought fr oz)she will wear when we carry her out of hospital.we have chose not to claim her body.
I'm consoling myself,saying this is like a miscarriage,only that it happened so late in the pregnancy,the only way i can get the foetus out of the body is thru' delivery.C section wasn't even offered to me!but i still think of the baby every night.i have her image etched deeply in my mind.i choose to,coz she'll always be my little angel.
It's ok to cry.i've told hubby to let me cry.i'm sure i will find strength to move on.but seeing my hubby interact with friend's babies pierces thru' my heart.but hey,i've made it thru' 1 baby gathering.it didn't kill me.
I'm doing all these more for my hubby,coz i know he loves kids & want a family of his own.
I know the 2nd pregnancy is going to be tough mentally,but can u tell me how asprin impacted on ur 2nd pregnancy?i'm in the medical field,so i'm totally aware of the complications of the action of asprin.
I also want to know if ur gynae did additional scans etc or scans more frequently?i've even organised insurance in preparation for the 2nd pregnancy so that we don't have to end up spending so much money.or juz in case of complications.
jasmum,i would like to know more abt ur experience on the 2nd pregnancy.how u coped with it mentally etc.if u don't mind sharing ur experience.did u try not to have too much hope for the 2nd prengnancy? juz in case u get disappointed?
to have it happen once is tough,to have it happen twice,it's a miracle u are still so mentally strong.
Sorry for ur loss.I lost my baby on 30Jul (very recently) & currently doing my confinement.I feel so stupid that it has to be done,but for the sake of strengthening my body (i m planning to try quite soon),i'm putting myself thru' this.
I had the same diagnosis as u.Thrombotic fetal vasculopathy.This is my 1st pregnancy.I'm free of risk factor,27 y.o.Hubby is 29 when i conceived.
the morn it all happened,i was so engrossed in getting hubby off to work on time,me getting to work on time,i totally forgot abt baby.maybe coz i didn't expect this to happen.I was so engrossed the whole day with work that i didn't even realise that baby not moving until i had dinner with my mum & she asked me abt the baby.U know,i'm so close yet so far.that week was the beginning of the 29th wk.i had no symptoms.no contractions,bleeding etc.i could even drive myself to the hospital.
this whole period has been a blur.hubby seem to be able to move on very quickly.& u know,i want to punch those ppl who tell me,"it's ok,u're still young,u can try again."i don't know if it's hurting so much coz i had so much plans for this expected daughter.everything has been bought.i juz need the baby.we had planned wat to name her,i've even planned the cute clothes (all bought fr oz)she will wear when we carry her out of hospital.we have chose not to claim her body.
I'm consoling myself,saying this is like a miscarriage,only that it happened so late in the pregnancy,the only way i can get the foetus out of the body is thru' delivery.C section wasn't even offered to me!but i still think of the baby every night.i have her image etched deeply in my mind.i choose to,coz she'll always be my little angel.
It's ok to cry.i've told hubby to let me cry.i'm sure i will find strength to move on.but seeing my hubby interact with friend's babies pierces thru' my heart.but hey,i've made it thru' 1 baby gathering.it didn't kill me.
I'm doing all these more for my hubby,coz i know he loves kids & want a family of his own.
I know the 2nd pregnancy is going to be tough mentally,but can u tell me how asprin impacted on ur 2nd pregnancy?i'm in the medical field,so i'm totally aware of the complications of the action of asprin.
I also want to know if ur gynae did additional scans etc or scans more frequently?i've even organised insurance in preparation for the 2nd pregnancy so that we don't have to end up spending so much money.or juz in case of complications.
jasmum,i would like to know more abt ur experience on the 2nd pregnancy.how u coped with it mentally etc.if u don't mind sharing ur experience.did u try not to have too much hope for the 2nd prengnancy? juz in case u get disappointed?
to have it happen once is tough,to have it happen twice,it's a miracle u are still so mentally strong.
Jasmum,
Can i also find out fr u who ur gynae is?fr wat i know,thrombotic fetal vasculopathy is a 1 in 1000 chance of occurrence.fr reading ur experience & angel's experience,it seems that any thing can happen.& life is so cruel that it has happened repeated for both of u
Can i also find out fr u who ur gynae is?fr wat i know,thrombotic fetal vasculopathy is a 1 in 1000 chance of occurrence.fr reading ur experience & angel's experience,it seems that any thing can happen.& life is so cruel that it has happened repeated for both of u
jasmum
Member
Monster (monster),
<hugs>
only the ladies here will know... what one is going thru', went thru' and going thru'... again.
my doctors are from raffles hospital - all the while since i was 22yrs i see Dr. Joan Thong Pao-Wen http://www.rafflesmedicalgroup.com/web/contents/Contents.aspx?ContId=331
(she was also my then ex.company doc) my late mum had cancer, so i had to see Dr Thong for pap annualy, so i am very comforatble with Dr Thong. she even delivered my 1st born - my son 8yrs ago, i was then 29.
in beginning '06, after trying for months and finally gotten preg. it was really a wonderful moment... my son was then 6yrs old... and we were all looking forward to another child.
my preg. moments are all very smooth, no morning sickness, no risk, no crave, etc... the only prob was having break-outs but i was able to eat and get-on day to day.
but... yet, this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happened.
pathology was Dr Hwang from KKH and he mentioned in the report that there were no 2nd occurrence known... when my baby had it the 1st time in '06.
Dr Thong, sat thru with hubby and I, and we ended up almost 2hrs of talking and understanding... as you know, medical term very "chiam", so she had to go thru' with us the details in lay-men's term and that takes up alot of time explaining. she even spend some time talking to my son... and let him know what had happened.
well, she advised a complete 3 AF cycles before trying and since the report shows that i am fit and well, passing all the numerous tests. she was certain in no way i am / my body at fault. but hubby and i wasn't so hard-working trying again...
till in Aug'07, we were blessed again.
immediately at 5wks she did a v-scan and found the sac. she told me, if possible to slow-down and rest more (which i really did) even though knowing that i am fit and able... but i guess, deep down we all want to be "safe" and do the right thing.
she got me in again at 7wks and again v-scan and we saw and heard the heart beat
i saw her every 2 weeks and baby growth was good and well... nothing amiss.
at the 1st FTS 12wks (can't quite remb) DR Tony Tan (he's a maternal fetal medicine specialist) http://www.rafflesmedicalgroup.com/web/contents/Contents.aspx?ContId=359
he did the thorough scan and did notice of a 'norch' in the blood flow of the cord, but it wasn't anything dangerous / complicated... but due to the 1st loss, he then advise to put me on blood thinners - baby aspirin (Glyprin - made up of 100mg aspirin & glycine 45mg) <font color="0000ff">i am taking this still, just to prepare my body in case i do get preg. again. no big major harm to the body actually just that when you get a little cut, you will bleed a little bit more, but it does good to one's heart, providing a good smooth blood flow thru' the heart, etc... so it's more of a plus taking baby aspirin than not - just my humble opinion that i agreed with my doctors</font>
pass all the blood, urine tests, etc...
so taking aspirin and the usual bed rest... baby and i were doing well.
then came the 20wk FTS scan - again Dr Tan did and it was so good. that 'norch' disappeared, showing the flow of blood was very smooth.
(can see on the ultra-sound scan machine, for blood it's shown in colors blue, yellow... and also on another the wave graph reading report will tally accordingly)
hmm... i am not sure if all the other doctors in other hospitals have such or do such, but i know my doctors are very passionate on their job and also base on what had happened, i know i am "very well monitored" by them.
the blood, urine test etc... all showed normal again. and Dr Tan said to still stay on aspirin then too... same reason as mentioned...
but in Jan'08, i remembered praying so hard that night... b'cos i didn't recall feeling baby moving; i was up alone watching tv, hubby and son were asleep and it was a weekday... Wed night/Thurs morning... and at 4am i was at peace - a feeling that i know my Abba Father has given me... i finally fell asleep and got up later to get b'fast for hubby and son. i put my fears aside and didn't want to know... i kept feeling lil' movements, so i thought was ok...[which later Dr Thong told me it's b'coz baby was floating in the water bag] but i lost baby then already... only on Sunday 20th call Dr Thong who told me to come in and we found out then.
i delivered on 23Jan naturally, of course... and was very fast...
the same Dr Hwang from KKH handled my autopsy. and he did refer back to the '06 report and that's when now Dr Thong and Tan brought it up to the panel of doctors at their monthly meetings. they had to investigate and did some research and Dr Tan gotten hold of 2 overseas doctors it seem who has a little information on this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy".
they made me go thru' further blood testings again and hubby too... and even went back to the 2 autopsy reports to check further - i was told they did some lab tests to check if baby had any infection or was developing any infection, etc...
but sadly no conclusion on how to prevent or how did this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happened...
there was a couple of suggestions but <font color="ff0000">!! NOT a confirm preventive !!</font>
- like taking injections can't remember what it is call... but this has a severed known side-effect that if MTB takes this injection - baby is at a risk of retardation...
Dr Tan gave me 1set of reading research notes... which only a doctor can get access to.
you can only read a little info on this website:
human pathology volume 35, issue 12 12 Dec '04 pages 1494-1498
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6WGD-4DS45J8-1&_user=10&_coverDate=12%2F31%2F2004&_rdoc=13&_fmt=high&_orig=browse&_srch=doc-info(%23toc%236820%232004%23999649987%23545107%23FLA%23display%23Volume)&_cdi=6820&_sort=d&_docanchor=&_ct=31&_acct=C000050221&_version=1&_urlVersion=0&_userid=10&md5=5bb224fe767193b1c5c6635f25ada8f4
i have a full copy but there isn't any findings i am afriad...
indeed, not all M/C or stillbirth can be prevented...
and it actually helps if people also STOP comparing... or <font color="119911">think they know what had happened or could do or should do... blahh-blahh...</font> i am sure you gals know what i mean....
for me - my family... we move on by Faith. it is honestly the only way (for me)...
i may seem strong, but only i know how weary i can be...
emotion is within... deep down in our hearts... that's why it is known and written in the Bible that we (women) are the "weaker vessal" and our husbad are to treat us right...
we are known to rule with our hearts... not so much of our mind...
there is so much unexplaining that is happening around the world today... so i guess, our stand is HE IS IN CONTROL (as always, and we need to let HIM hold the remote-control)
i am not from the medical field, but i am a 1st aid trained and am also train to deliver a child. haaa...!! those were the days...
i do read alot, i am that person who needs to read, to need to fit in some logic words for understandings... so i guess it helps my moving forward.
as for our husband - well, ladies, not that my husband is any better... but he tries...
like mentioned above, men works with their mind... they don't feel as much as we do b'cos
1- they didn't carry the baby... they can never know and feel that.
2- the pain are in our hearts... and it's not something we can pass on to them for them to feel.
they can just wipe our tears and hold our hands...
3- they have WORK / DISRACTIONS to keep their minds off "unhappiness"... remember, they don't feel with their hearts.
when the dates approached, i had to remind hubby what i want to do and also to please give me that extra 'grace' for being in the blues... i share a lot with my son as we spend so many hours together... my son and i have a pretty special bond also lah.... i b'fed him for 3yrs leh !!! he better be nice and loving to me !! haa !!!
ohh... how i wish i could write more... i want to address on the issue on the many mentions on having to deliver stillborn naturally.
ok, just a quick one... as i need to get off line liao.
ladies,
it is a known fact that our body will naturally expell what is not part of our inside/body...
in time, even if you don't relised that baby has died in the womb, in a matter of weeks, you will go into labour - naturally.
why naturally,
stillborn less than 38wks is not a full grown 48~52cm, there is no 10cm dilation required... the cervix will be naturally soften, open up (after taking the oral or drip, etc...) and you will be able to be in control to push when you know it's ready.
also, no one would know how long already baby had since passed-on...
just that the longer the wait and delay, infection could set-in. so natural expell is encourage as baby is pushed out, thereafter tissues, placenta, membranous,etc...
in fact if all is passed out naturally and completely, sometimes D&C is then not required.
naturally for your safety (also)
your doctors / mid-wives is able to attend to your scream, cries, etc... you are able to talk to them and let them know what is happening, etc...
c-sec / epi / ga (all co$t alot more too)
all these have 'side' effects or some form.
c-sec will slow down the recovery. and baby could be really tiny and i think there is a doctor's code as to how and when they can do a c-sec, when necessarily.
epi will cost alot extra and also have to be administer at the right time, which only having a live baby / labour can provide as the OCT monitor will be tape to your belly as your 'tell-sign', but... in this case can't tell...
most importantly,
the test that are required of you to do after the delivery... if i am not mistaken, you need to give your 1st pee within the 1st hour of delivery. and in order to do this, one must be able to stand / be able... then also the blood tests, have to give samples, etc...
doctors would want minimal complications to happened, and natural derivery is <font color="0000ff">tough to go thru</font> but it's honestly for our body better, to not have any "foreign" matters involve.
well... guess, that's just my 2cents worth of knowledge sharing.
i really got to log-off now...
do take care ladies, and stay in touch online.
Please do forgive me if my words are too forwarding and caused you hurt... i meant no malice hor...
have a blessed rest and a wonderful weekend too.
<love-love>
<hugs>
only the ladies here will know... what one is going thru', went thru' and going thru'... again.
my doctors are from raffles hospital - all the while since i was 22yrs i see Dr. Joan Thong Pao-Wen http://www.rafflesmedicalgroup.com/web/contents/Contents.aspx?ContId=331
(she was also my then ex.company doc) my late mum had cancer, so i had to see Dr Thong for pap annualy, so i am very comforatble with Dr Thong. she even delivered my 1st born - my son 8yrs ago, i was then 29.
in beginning '06, after trying for months and finally gotten preg. it was really a wonderful moment... my son was then 6yrs old... and we were all looking forward to another child.
my preg. moments are all very smooth, no morning sickness, no risk, no crave, etc... the only prob was having break-outs but i was able to eat and get-on day to day.
but... yet, this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happened.
pathology was Dr Hwang from KKH and he mentioned in the report that there were no 2nd occurrence known... when my baby had it the 1st time in '06.
Dr Thong, sat thru with hubby and I, and we ended up almost 2hrs of talking and understanding... as you know, medical term very "chiam", so she had to go thru' with us the details in lay-men's term and that takes up alot of time explaining. she even spend some time talking to my son... and let him know what had happened.
well, she advised a complete 3 AF cycles before trying and since the report shows that i am fit and well, passing all the numerous tests. she was certain in no way i am / my body at fault. but hubby and i wasn't so hard-working trying again...
till in Aug'07, we were blessed again.
immediately at 5wks she did a v-scan and found the sac. she told me, if possible to slow-down and rest more (which i really did) even though knowing that i am fit and able... but i guess, deep down we all want to be "safe" and do the right thing.
she got me in again at 7wks and again v-scan and we saw and heard the heart beat
i saw her every 2 weeks and baby growth was good and well... nothing amiss.
at the 1st FTS 12wks (can't quite remb) DR Tony Tan (he's a maternal fetal medicine specialist) http://www.rafflesmedicalgroup.com/web/contents/Contents.aspx?ContId=359
he did the thorough scan and did notice of a 'norch' in the blood flow of the cord, but it wasn't anything dangerous / complicated... but due to the 1st loss, he then advise to put me on blood thinners - baby aspirin (Glyprin - made up of 100mg aspirin & glycine 45mg) <font color="0000ff">i am taking this still, just to prepare my body in case i do get preg. again. no big major harm to the body actually just that when you get a little cut, you will bleed a little bit more, but it does good to one's heart, providing a good smooth blood flow thru' the heart, etc... so it's more of a plus taking baby aspirin than not - just my humble opinion that i agreed with my doctors</font>
pass all the blood, urine tests, etc...
so taking aspirin and the usual bed rest... baby and i were doing well.
then came the 20wk FTS scan - again Dr Tan did and it was so good. that 'norch' disappeared, showing the flow of blood was very smooth.
(can see on the ultra-sound scan machine, for blood it's shown in colors blue, yellow... and also on another the wave graph reading report will tally accordingly)
hmm... i am not sure if all the other doctors in other hospitals have such or do such, but i know my doctors are very passionate on their job and also base on what had happened, i know i am "very well monitored" by them.
the blood, urine test etc... all showed normal again. and Dr Tan said to still stay on aspirin then too... same reason as mentioned...
but in Jan'08, i remembered praying so hard that night... b'cos i didn't recall feeling baby moving; i was up alone watching tv, hubby and son were asleep and it was a weekday... Wed night/Thurs morning... and at 4am i was at peace - a feeling that i know my Abba Father has given me... i finally fell asleep and got up later to get b'fast for hubby and son. i put my fears aside and didn't want to know... i kept feeling lil' movements, so i thought was ok...[which later Dr Thong told me it's b'coz baby was floating in the water bag] but i lost baby then already... only on Sunday 20th call Dr Thong who told me to come in and we found out then.
i delivered on 23Jan naturally, of course... and was very fast...
the same Dr Hwang from KKH handled my autopsy. and he did refer back to the '06 report and that's when now Dr Thong and Tan brought it up to the panel of doctors at their monthly meetings. they had to investigate and did some research and Dr Tan gotten hold of 2 overseas doctors it seem who has a little information on this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy".
they made me go thru' further blood testings again and hubby too... and even went back to the 2 autopsy reports to check further - i was told they did some lab tests to check if baby had any infection or was developing any infection, etc...
but sadly no conclusion on how to prevent or how did this "hypercoiled umbilical cord causing thrombotic fetal vasculopathy" happened...
there was a couple of suggestions but <font color="ff0000">!! NOT a confirm preventive !!</font>
- like taking injections can't remember what it is call... but this has a severed known side-effect that if MTB takes this injection - baby is at a risk of retardation...
Dr Tan gave me 1set of reading research notes... which only a doctor can get access to.
you can only read a little info on this website:
human pathology volume 35, issue 12 12 Dec '04 pages 1494-1498
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob=ArticleURL&_udi=B6WGD-4DS45J8-1&_user=10&_coverDate=12%2F31%2F2004&_rdoc=13&_fmt=high&_orig=browse&_srch=doc-info(%23toc%236820%232004%23999649987%23545107%23FLA%23display%23Volume)&_cdi=6820&_sort=d&_docanchor=&_ct=31&_acct=C000050221&_version=1&_urlVersion=0&_userid=10&md5=5bb224fe767193b1c5c6635f25ada8f4
i have a full copy but there isn't any findings i am afriad...
indeed, not all M/C or stillbirth can be prevented...
and it actually helps if people also STOP comparing... or <font color="119911">think they know what had happened or could do or should do... blahh-blahh...</font> i am sure you gals know what i mean....
for me - my family... we move on by Faith. it is honestly the only way (for me)...
i may seem strong, but only i know how weary i can be...
emotion is within... deep down in our hearts... that's why it is known and written in the Bible that we (women) are the "weaker vessal" and our husbad are to treat us right...
we are known to rule with our hearts... not so much of our mind...
there is so much unexplaining that is happening around the world today... so i guess, our stand is HE IS IN CONTROL (as always, and we need to let HIM hold the remote-control)
i am not from the medical field, but i am a 1st aid trained and am also train to deliver a child. haaa...!! those were the days...
i do read alot, i am that person who needs to read, to need to fit in some logic words for understandings... so i guess it helps my moving forward.
as for our husband - well, ladies, not that my husband is any better... but he tries...
like mentioned above, men works with their mind... they don't feel as much as we do b'cos
1- they didn't carry the baby... they can never know and feel that.
2- the pain are in our hearts... and it's not something we can pass on to them for them to feel.
they can just wipe our tears and hold our hands...
3- they have WORK / DISRACTIONS to keep their minds off "unhappiness"... remember, they don't feel with their hearts.
when the dates approached, i had to remind hubby what i want to do and also to please give me that extra 'grace' for being in the blues... i share a lot with my son as we spend so many hours together... my son and i have a pretty special bond also lah.... i b'fed him for 3yrs leh !!! he better be nice and loving to me !! haa !!!
ohh... how i wish i could write more... i want to address on the issue on the many mentions on having to deliver stillborn naturally.
ok, just a quick one... as i need to get off line liao.
ladies,
it is a known fact that our body will naturally expell what is not part of our inside/body...
in time, even if you don't relised that baby has died in the womb, in a matter of weeks, you will go into labour - naturally.
why naturally,
stillborn less than 38wks is not a full grown 48~52cm, there is no 10cm dilation required... the cervix will be naturally soften, open up (after taking the oral or drip, etc...) and you will be able to be in control to push when you know it's ready.
also, no one would know how long already baby had since passed-on...
just that the longer the wait and delay, infection could set-in. so natural expell is encourage as baby is pushed out, thereafter tissues, placenta, membranous,etc...
in fact if all is passed out naturally and completely, sometimes D&C is then not required.
naturally for your safety (also)
your doctors / mid-wives is able to attend to your scream, cries, etc... you are able to talk to them and let them know what is happening, etc...
c-sec / epi / ga (all co$t alot more too)
all these have 'side' effects or some form.
c-sec will slow down the recovery. and baby could be really tiny and i think there is a doctor's code as to how and when they can do a c-sec, when necessarily.
epi will cost alot extra and also have to be administer at the right time, which only having a live baby / labour can provide as the OCT monitor will be tape to your belly as your 'tell-sign', but... in this case can't tell...
most importantly,
the test that are required of you to do after the delivery... if i am not mistaken, you need to give your 1st pee within the 1st hour of delivery. and in order to do this, one must be able to stand / be able... then also the blood tests, have to give samples, etc...
doctors would want minimal complications to happened, and natural derivery is <font color="0000ff">tough to go thru</font> but it's honestly for our body better, to not have any "foreign" matters involve.
well... guess, that's just my 2cents worth of knowledge sharing.
i really got to log-off now...
do take care ladies, and stay in touch online.
Please do forgive me if my words are too forwarding and caused you hurt... i meant no malice hor...
have a blessed rest and a wonderful weekend too.
<love-love>
Hi Jasmum,
thanks for ur info.u know,at least u have a healthy boy already.this is my 1st pregnancy & i'm really worried i cannot have kids of my own.
u are right when u say no one can understand the pain we go thru'.i cry every night.But i think once i return to work,at least i can keep my mind occupied.It's more heartwrenching esp this is my 1st baby.Guess it's all that expectation,excitement etc that we have all been looking fwd to.
I'm intending to look overseas for similar cases & check out their protocol of treatment.If needed,i may return to australia for treatment.Not sure yet.
Thx for ur support.
thanks for ur info.u know,at least u have a healthy boy already.this is my 1st pregnancy & i'm really worried i cannot have kids of my own.
u are right when u say no one can understand the pain we go thru'.i cry every night.But i think once i return to work,at least i can keep my mind occupied.It's more heartwrenching esp this is my 1st baby.Guess it's all that expectation,excitement etc that we have all been looking fwd to.
I'm intending to look overseas for similar cases & check out their protocol of treatment.If needed,i may return to australia for treatment.Not sure yet.
Thx for ur support.
jasmum
Member
Monster (monster),
oui, change your nick lah... you are not "monster"
heee....
take your time allow yourself to grief... it is what you have to go thru'.
err... if i could say...please, as much i know i won't take offend - really
but <font color="0000ff">don't comment again to anyone... on this phrase "u know,at least u have a healthy boy already"</font>.
yes, i may have a child already, but i do want some more
and it seems that i can have but just that... the "unknown" has had over taken it.
so it's not very nice to hear / read it...
even though, it's not meant to be sarcastic or whatever negative output... but just so, it's not nice for mums like me who has have children and yet go thru; such loss...
in fact, due to this, it also puzzles my docs. b'cos i had a healthy child... anyway, just a sharing hor... not at all offended *really* [smile-smile]
ohhh... and i hate that phrase; "it's ok... you can always try again and have another baby"
arrghhh !!!
i wanted those 2 babies but it was just not for me to have them [full-stop].
i always believe, if don't know how to say or comfort, best to just hug and keep quiet... send e-cards, flowers, choco, etc... those are very comforting...
*sigh* i say this b'cos i did have a fair share... of ugly remarks and not once but twice !!! and among families... what a drag and disappointment...
anyway, do take care... keep an open mind and heart, it doesn't mean that else where has better doctors... this diagnose is "new" that's why IF i do get preg. again... i will be a case study "object"... and i guess, knowing my doctors and they knowing me, is very important in this aspect.
take care. <hugs>
have a blessed weekend
oui, change your nick lah... you are not "monster"
take your time allow yourself to grief... it is what you have to go thru'.
err... if i could say...please, as much i know i won't take offend - really
yes, i may have a child already, but i do want some more
so it's not very nice to hear / read it...
even though, it's not meant to be sarcastic or whatever negative output... but just so, it's not nice for mums like me who has have children and yet go thru; such loss...
in fact, due to this, it also puzzles my docs. b'cos i had a healthy child... anyway, just a sharing hor... not at all offended *really* [smile-smile]
ohhh... and i hate that phrase; "it's ok... you can always try again and have another baby"
arrghhh !!!
i wanted those 2 babies but it was just not for me to have them [full-stop].
i always believe, if don't know how to say or comfort, best to just hug and keep quiet... send e-cards, flowers, choco, etc... those are very comforting...
*sigh* i say this b'cos i did have a fair share... of ugly remarks and not once but twice !!! and among families... what a drag and disappointment...
anyway, do take care... keep an open mind and heart, it doesn't mean that else where has better doctors... this diagnose is "new" that's why IF i do get preg. again... i will be a case study "object"... and i guess, knowing my doctors and they knowing me, is very important in this aspect.
take care. <hugs>
have a blessed weekend
Hi Jasmum,
Oops,sorry for the insenstivive comment.I have been reading a lot (okie,i'm a dentist,so i understand most of the medical terms & i've been looking thru' medical journals) & the articles seem to suggest thrombotic fetal vasculopathy does have serious consequences.
1) Intrauterine Death
2) High mortality rate
3) Babies with liver problems
I'm really concerned abt all these negative consequences that i've been reading abt.have u been tested for thrombophilia?
Once i've completed reading those articles,i'm going to go thru' my report again to find out if i'm a thrombophilia.if i'm not tested,i may get tested.or even my husband could be a thrombophilia.I'm also finding out if the States & Australia has specialist who are able to manage this condition.Will share the info with u if i do get responses fr my sources.There is also a suggestion that it's due to 1 of the factors called FV Leiden & this is hereditary.
I'm not sure how i'm going to cope with the 2nd pregnancy.i'm with KKH,but i have yet to speak to a maternal fetal med specialist on this issue.my gynae seem to think that asprin is adequate for prevention,but i think there is more than wat meets the eye.if i can have extra shots of heparin,i will.but juz wonder if it helps.
Oops,sorry for the insenstivive comment.I have been reading a lot (okie,i'm a dentist,so i understand most of the medical terms & i've been looking thru' medical journals) & the articles seem to suggest thrombotic fetal vasculopathy does have serious consequences.
1) Intrauterine Death
2) High mortality rate
3) Babies with liver problems
I'm really concerned abt all these negative consequences that i've been reading abt.have u been tested for thrombophilia?
Once i've completed reading those articles,i'm going to go thru' my report again to find out if i'm a thrombophilia.if i'm not tested,i may get tested.or even my husband could be a thrombophilia.I'm also finding out if the States & Australia has specialist who are able to manage this condition.Will share the info with u if i do get responses fr my sources.There is also a suggestion that it's due to 1 of the factors called FV Leiden & this is hereditary.
I'm not sure how i'm going to cope with the 2nd pregnancy.i'm with KKH,but i have yet to speak to a maternal fetal med specialist on this issue.my gynae seem to think that asprin is adequate for prevention,but i think there is more than wat meets the eye.if i can have extra shots of heparin,i will.but juz wonder if it helps.