Support group - Miscarriages

xxhazel_nutxx said:
Yup I'm going for the op this Thursday. It's actually something very straightforward but I dunno why after tdy's visit at the Dr I just feel so defeated all over again. It's like I'm so tired of all these. Why are the bad news never ending and the good news so short lived.
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Thing are happen unexpectedly sometime but for dh n ourselves we will be able to work n pull thru. Aft my 2mc I told myself d&c is a closure to the chapter and I must take care myself for my hub as I ever thought of why not I fainted when cried badly don ever wake up? But aft that I realise dh are w me n we can always ttc again when we are ready. Like now I told myself we can be better patents as we went thru so much than normal pregnancy. God will bless us. You can do it and jiayou. We all will have our rainbow baby :)
 


hopeful_mum said:
Just seen prof. Not so good news. They found 2 cysts near the baby brain I think. Could be chromosomal issue. He says nothing to worry abt at this moment cox I did my detailed scan early. They usually that's the reason why they don't do it so early cox it will usually go away by 21weeks so I'm banned from googling.

Now can only pray it goes away. If it doesn't then need to do amnio to check. He doesn't want to do amnio now cox it can come back healthy results but risk of miscarriage. He says if doesn't go away then do.

I'm devastated. Can only pray now.
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Hi hopeful_mum, I noe it's difficult to stop worrying but there's nth u can do nw except to pray... hv faith tat the cysts will go away by themselves... will keep u in my prayers... stay strong and positive for ur bb...

xxhazel_nutxx said:
Hi everyone, sorry to be rant get here again. I'm feeling so defeated right now all over again. After my miscarriage, I've not stopped spotting for over 2 weeks and over the past few days it has been more than spotting. More like period like discharge. I was quite worried that the bleeding is taking too long so went to see Dr tdy. Scan shows that there's no sac but there's an area that like very vascular yet can't see any visible mass. Dr advice to go for hysteroscopy kiv d&c. It's been 3 weeks plus since my miscarriage and I was starting to feel better. But after tdy, I felt totally defeated again. I was prepared to start ttc again but it's like the worst has yet to come. A never ending nightmare that we can't wake up to....
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Hazelnut, it's better to seek the gynae advice to go for the check or even the d&c procedure to hv a complete closure... can understand how u feel, it's totally disheartening when u tot everything is over but yet it's nt totally over... jz take ur time to nurse bk ur body first...
 
My ttc cycle failed again this month :( felt very very down last weekend because AF didnt come, but yet my HPT was negative. When it finally came yesteday i told hub dont need to brew TCM cos AF was here.. he replied "its ok dont be discouraged". Just these words i felt like crying when I was outside. Super emo no feelings could describe the disappointment i felt again...

its like oral med failed, IVF failed, when i finally BFP i lost it. then i tried FET again, failed. Now own natural cycle also fail.

how many more failures do i have to do thru to have a bb??
 
Now den I know b4 having ivig the temp must b 37.2 or low dunno y my temp was 37.4 twice lucky go down to exactly 37.2. Ivig 4hrs drip now den know it is fat ppl I might need up to 6hrs. Hand numb vein itchy. But pray hard crossed fingers toes eveywhere for the best :)
 
baby_sparkles said:
My ttc cycle failed again this month :( felt very very down last weekend because AF didnt come, but yet my HPT was negative. When it finally came yesteday i told hub dont need to brew TCM cos AF was here.. he replied "its ok dont be discouraged". Just these words i felt like crying when I was outside. Super emo no feelings could describe the disappointment i felt again...

its like oral med failed, IVF failed, when i finally BFP i lost it. then i tried FET again, failed. Now own natural cycle also fail.

how many more failures do i have to do thru to have a bb??
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I totally understand. It's like when my hub text me to day how brave I am etc and that even if after going through all these and nothing come out of it he is still happy to be just with me. I could help tearing when I'm at work. It just makes me so upset.
 
baby_sparkles said:
My ttc cycle failed again this month :( felt very very down last weekend because AF didnt come, but yet my HPT was negative. When it finally came yesteday i told hub dont need to brew TCM cos AF was here.. he replied "its ok dont be discouraged". Just these words i felt like crying when I was outside. Super emo no feelings could describe the disappointment i felt again...

its like oral med failed, IVF failed, when i finally BFP i lost it. then i tried FET again, failed. Now own natural cycle also fail.

how many more failures do i have to do thru to have a bb??
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*Hug* don't think like that. Sometimes too stress also no good.

I am very stressed when I am ttc-ing coz I have a 不认输 kind of attitude. I always felt we have to give it our best shot then if really don't have then I give up. My husband think otherwise, he felt that it will come will come.

Then when finally come, 2 times all MCs, first time was really hard to swallow, the 2nd time was easier to manage.
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
I totally understand. It's like when my hub text me to day how brave I am etc and that even if after going through all these and nothing come out of it he is still happy to be just with me. I could help tearing when I'm at work. It just makes me so upset.
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*hug* I think after the d&c and all the bleeding/spotting has stopped, you will feel closure on the matter. Take your time to grieve.
Your husband is very supportive.
 
Hugs sparkles! Af means new cycle to try soon ok? :)
Hoped everything went smoothly for u hopeful mum! Bb will b ok de! Jia you!
Vac- ur story is v inspiring! V v brave mummy!
Chew n hazel dont b sad....i have a polyp after my mc too,dragged for 2mths liao...at first dr said see if it will b washed out with menses but didnt...n i went Malaysia for a short trip so missed the op, actually i duno how many mths since i mc le...i sort of dun wan to recall ahhaa...but i will b going for an op to remove the polyp next mth...sigh means cant try next mth le... Really hoped to have a closure n try again...let's jia you!
 
I like this place a lot for the encouragement.

I don't talk to my friends about my MCs cause they all got pregnant smoothly.
Last year was quite hard for me to swallow cause 2 of my best friend was pregnant at the start of the year and my sis got pregnant at the end of the year too.
 
sunflower307 said:
I like this place a lot for the encouragement.

I don't talk to my friends about my MCs cause they all got pregnant smoothly.
Last year was quite hard for me to swallow cause 2 of my best friend was pregnant at the start of the year and my sis got pregnant at the end of the year too.
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It is not easy even my elder sis also don understand.
Most painful is she deliver this year b4 cny. I even skipped cny n went to tw w my hub this year.
 
Give a hope said:
It is not easy even my elder sis also don understand.
Most painful is she deliver this year b4 cny. I even skipped cny n went to tw w my hub this year.
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It was my younger sis who is pregnant. But I was really happy for her, she is also very supportive for me. When I MC the first time, she and her hub send me to the doc for the 2nd blood test, she cried with me.
We were really close. I always talk to her tummy and feel her tummy, baby even kick a few times on my hand.
I really felt my baby niece recognize my voice when she was born.
 
Thanks everyone for your support and encouragement. Like what others said I really find peace here as I know everyone experienced the same and know exactly how I feel.
We could all understand perfectly how each other feel which makes me don't feel so alone.
Sunflower, I understand how hard it is to swallow news of pple being pregnant around you also. It's like happy for them yet envy. Like why others can just get pregnant by breathing air. So easy while others have to try so hard. And after succeeded so short lived joy. Then comes the repercussions of the miscarriage like polyps etc.... its like a never ending nightmare
But I pray that eventually, all of us will have the strength and faith to continue pressing on and have faith that the day will come.
Like my husband says, he believe that put of all these something good will come out of it and we will become better parents to our children.
Jia you to everyone!
 
yap, can't share with my friends coz they don't understand the frustration that was going thru me.
so even now I am pregnant, I don't dare to celebrate. Don't even think of buying baby clothes and what's not. hahha
Counting the weeks feel like months. Constant fear at the back of my head, although I tell myself don't think about it.

SPREAD BABY DUST TO ALL~~~
Jia you!
 
sunflower307 said:
It was my younger sis who is pregnant. But I was really happy for her, she is also very supportive for me. When I MC the first time, she and her hub send me to the doc for the 2nd blood test, she cried with me.
We were really close. I always talk to her tummy and feel her tummy, baby even kick a few times on my hand.
I really felt my baby niece recognize my voice when she was born.
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Good eh unlike my elder sis don understand at all saying I wasted so much money on all tests n need to go thru so many treatments once preggie saying I problematic. Sometime the person closed to u the word really hurt.
 
sunflower307 said:
yap, can't share with my friends coz they don't understand the frustration that was going thru me.
so even now I am pregnant, I don't dare to celebrate. Don't even think of buying baby clothes and what's not. hahha
Counting the weeks feel like months. Constant fear at the back of my head, although I tell myself don't think about it.

SPREAD BABY DUST TO ALL~~~
Jia you!
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Haha but ur 1st trimester going to end soon right?
Are u working now? I was thinking to ask for HPL for 1st trimester to have more rest.
 
my 1st tri ending in 2 weeks time and I only get to see my baby again by then.. till now haven seen for 2 weeks. haha trying to stay calm.

I am working, :p taking it easy. I let a few of my colleagues know and they help me out with heavy things.
I din take any leave :) but no mood to work. *touch wood* I only nausea most of the time.
 
Give a hope said:
Good eh unlike my elder sis don understand at all saying I wasted so much money on all tests n need to go thru so many treatments once preggie saying I problematic. Sometime the person closed to u the word really hurt.
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Don't bother about her words. We will treasure our kids more. :)
 
sunflower307 said:
my 1st tri ending in 2 weeks time and I only get to see my baby again by then.. till now haven seen for 2 weeks. haha trying to stay calm.

I am working, :p taking it easy. I let a few of my colleagues know and they help me out with heavy things.
I din take any leave :) but no mood to work. *touch wood* I only nausea most of the time.
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Err I guess ur office mainly chinese ba. My office cos training dept so boss like diff nationality to her easy to work w employees but to me all helping own nationalities only n I am alone as in cannot count my boss in la...haha
Sian to work but at home time pass even slower.
Wow 2 more weeks to 14w? I still got half way to end of 1st trimester. A day to me like a mth...lol
 
sunflower307 said:
my 1st tri ending in 2 weeks time and I only get to see my baby again by then.. till now haven seen for 2 weeks. haha trying to stay calm.

I am working, :p taking it easy. I let a few of my colleagues know and they help me out with heavy things.
I din take any leave :) but no mood to work. *touch wood* I only nausea most of the time.
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It's good to have nausea. My colleague says that's good sign that baby is growing. Praying for a really smooth and non eventful pregnancy for you.
 
Give a hope said:
Good eh unlike my elder sis don understand at all saying I wasted so much money on all tests n need to go thru so many treatments once preggie saying I problematic. Sometime the person closed to u the word really hurt.
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They won't be able to understand totally. It's painful and sometimes angry to hear insensitive remarks especially when we feel so vulnerable at this stage. A lot of pple also question us why need to jump to ivf etc. It's like excuse me u think I very rich no where to spend my money so I use it to make baby is it? If I can get pregnant naturally why wld I still jump to this bandwagon and go through all the emotional and physical turmoil... There must be a reason right. Sigh. We just have to 1 ear in 1 ear out
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
They won't be able to understand totally. It's painful and sometimes angry to hear insensitive remarks especially when we feel so vulnerable at this stage. A lot of pple also question us why need to jump to ivf etc. It's like excuse me u think I very rich no where to spend my money so I use it to make baby is it? If I can get pregnant naturally why wld I still jump to this bandwagon and go through all the emotional and physical turmoil... There must be a reason right. Sigh. We just have to 1 ear in 1 ear out
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Ya very angry until got one point I didn't wan to c her for few mth n will nv mention about my current pregnancy n treatments that I gone thru to her as in don understand yet comment so much so rather not to let her know.
She kept whatsapps me saying mc is very common nth to be sad n to her she want to enjoy couple life if can den why she gave birth of 2 dau? To them gave birth early closed shop n kids grown up their burden less. As in she think we got too much money nth to invest? Who want to be parents late as in age of 40? Den 60yrs old kids still schooling? She said till like 40 just nice.
 
Yah I know it's like sometimes the more they try to comfort the worst it gets. Cos they'll try to downplay everything. Like when I went bk to work after the mc, my colleague told me it's ok you all still young and if it's not meant to be it will never be a smooth pregnancy. And cos u all want a baby too much that's why this happen. feel like a slap in the face and also feel like slaping her back haha. Like seriously, young means can afford to have more mcs ah? And I feel like tellg her means your parents don't really want you that's why u grow until so old is it. Argh. So angry..
 
Give a hope said:
Err I guess ur office mainly chinese ba. My office cos training dept so boss like diff nationality to her easy to work w employees but to me all helping own nationalities only n I am alone as in cannot count my boss in la...haha
Sian to work but at home time pass even slower.
Wow 2 more weeks to 14w? I still got half way to end of 1st trimester. A day to me like a mth...lol
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Me 2 me 2. Everyday felt super slow.....
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
Yah I know it's like sometimes the more they try to comfort the worst it gets. Cos they'll try to downplay everything. Like when I went bk to work after the mc, my colleague told me it's ok you all still young and if it's not meant to be it will never be a smooth pregnancy. And cos u all want a baby too much that's why this happen. feel like a slap in the face and also feel like slaping her back haha. Like seriously, young means can afford to have more mcs ah? And I feel like tellg her means your parents don't really want you that's why u grow until so old is it. Argh. So angry..
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Actually to me don say anything than comment something to them is nth but hurting us deeply.
Don need them to pity us as we know our condition n pull thru ourselves.
Ya lor slap her kao kao so bad. She got kids or not? Actually I do believe 留点口德 wait karma den know.
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
Yah I know it's like sometimes the more they try to comfort the worst it gets. Cos they'll try to downplay everything. Like when I went bk to work after the mc, my colleague told me it's ok you all still young and if it's not meant to be it will never be a smooth pregnancy. And cos u all want a baby too much that's why this happen. feel like a slap in the face and also feel like slaping her back haha. Like seriously, young means can afford to have more mcs ah? And I feel like tellg her means your parents don't really want you that's why u grow until so old is it. Argh. So angry..
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That is so rude and crude. I will be very so angry! Wah.. will get karma anot...

My colleague mil even worst. When my colleague Mc, she visit her and say no one in her family got problem of Mc. *Roll eyes*
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
She is not even married lor but got age already kind. Really irritating but I just nod my head.
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When still sad I will just keep quiet n wanna tear in the office for insensitive col till I told my hub I wanna quit lor cannot tahan n no eyes c or work w such col.
Ask her shut up la...aiyo
 
Give a hope said:
When still sad I will just keep quiet n wanna tear in the office for insensitive col till I told my hub I wanna quit lor cannot tahan n no eyes c or work w such col.
Ask her shut up la...aiyo
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Yah I also feel like quitting but no baby now also no reason to stop work... tdy I was also so emotional kept tearing while working.
 
xxhazel_nutxx said:
Yah I also feel like quitting but no baby now also no reason to stop work... tdy I was also so emotional kept tearing while working.
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Ya that time I also on same position wanted to quit but thinking of same tot so continue stay. Good thing of continue stay is can start ttc again when read as in cos I feel like not good if join new co few mth preggie n w current co wan to take leave or mc also easy abit.
 
hi ladies, i totally hear you. we lost our baby at 11 weeks earlier in March. I am now pregnant again, about 5 weeks along, but have a no symptoms at all, i heard it is not a good thing, so i am worried sick…

just hope that things will turn out right this time.
 
pumpkeen said:
hi ladies, i totally hear you. we lost our baby at 11 weeks earlier in March. I am now pregnant again, about 5 weeks along, but have a no symptoms at all, i heard it is not a good thing, so i am worried sick…

just hope that things will turn out right this time.
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Are you seeing the gynae early? I seen my gynae as soon as I am pregnant.
Maybe your HCG are building up, I only felt it when around 7weeks onwards.
 
Hi all, would like to know if anyone have any idea when will the bleeding start again after the jab (sorry I don't know the name of the jab). I think I got mc last wed. I immediately when to a gynae to scan after the bloody show, already cannot see sac or anything, assume to be 6 weeks preg then. Got the jab on Friday while waiting for test result to confirm baby still there or not. So until now only spotting, worry that the blood will "jam" inside.

I already book Malay massage next week is 3 days enough? Started eating bai feng wang today and cooking some "confinement" food myself. Plan to see a tcm soon to nurse back my health.
 
Hi squarebox, *hug* take care of yourself.

I din took the jab so can't advise you. Mine was natural miscarriage, I just waited and waited for maybe 4-7 days for bleeding to start. I think once the HCG level drop to the certain level, the bleeding will start.

Good to take confinement food. I din book Malay massage thou. you should take 生化汤 when your bleeding start, helps to clear the womb
 
Thanks sunflower307.

My hcg already drop to 3 when I last tested on Monday. I'm suppose to go back to my gynae 2 weeks later to scan to see if everything clear by itself. If not need wash up which I don't want. that's y wondering when will the bleeding start again. Haiz....
 
3 is really low.... I started bleeding when I was around 50+, and by the time of my review, I already drop to 3 and was nearly finishing off my bleeding.
every MC is different our body react differently.
My 2nd MC I took my HCG when I was bleeding and it was 15, and although I bled and spot for 3 weeks go see doc for a check and the HCG is still 15! never drop! felt like I bleed for nothing...
 
squarebox said:
Hi all, would like to know if anyone have any idea when will the bleeding start again after the jab (sorry I don't know the name of the jab). I think I got mc last wed. I immediately when to a gynae to scan after the bloody show, already cannot see sac or anything, assume to be 6 weeks preg then. Got the jab on Friday while waiting for test result to confirm baby still there or not. So until now only spotting, worry that the blood will "jam" inside.

I already book Malay massage next week is 3 days enough? Started eating bai feng wang today and cooking some "confinement" food myself. Plan to see a tcm soon to nurse back my health.
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Sorry for your loss..hugs.

I did not get any jab, mine twice was d&c and natural respectively. Sorry cannot advice. Did your gynae advice you on the procedure? like what to look out for after the jab?

I did not engage malay massage as well, only do mini confinement for 2 weeks. After spotting stopped, then I went back to see tcm to tiao my body.
 
Looks like many of you never get the jab. Cos on the day I mc my gynae is away. So the clinic refer me to another gynae near my place. Then that gynae only gave me some oral medication and didn't do any blood test. Only on Friday when my gynae is back then I saw him and took my blood test n jab. The jab is to save the baby incase the baby is still there even with the bleeding.

The clinic assistant told me that bleeding will start later. Maybe haven't start bleeding again cos the medication still in me cos my butt still hurts. Lol. Now only can wait and see when it will come.
 
I see, maybe the jab is a progesterone boost, then maybe becoz of that jab the bleeding is delayed.
the oral med din work?
I took oral med and massive cramping starts then I started AF again, that was my 2nd MC. in total I bled for 4 wks+.
 
squarebox said:
Looks like many of you never get the jab. Cos on the day I mc my gynae is away. So the clinic refer me to another gynae near my place. Then that gynae only gave me some oral medication and didn't do any blood test. Only on Friday when my gynae is back then I saw him and took my blood test n jab. The jab is to save the baby incase the baby is still there even with the bleeding.

The clinic assistant told me that bleeding will start later. Maybe haven't start bleeding again cos the medication still in me cos my butt still hurts. Lol. Now only can wait and see when it will come.
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I see. If both the jab and medication is meant to safe the baby, then it will take a while for spotting happened. If I did not remember wrongly, after stop the medication, spotting will happen within the next 3 days.
 


squarebox said:
Hi all, would like to know if anyone have any idea when will the bleeding start again after the jab (sorry I don't know the name of the jab). I think I got mc last wed. I immediately when to a gynae to scan after the bloody show, already cannot see sac or anything, assume to be 6 weeks preg then. Got the jab on Friday while waiting for test result to confirm baby still there or not. So until now only spotting, worry that the blood will "jam" inside.

I already book Malay massage next week is 3 days enough? Started eating bai feng wang today and cooking some "confinement" food myself. Plan to see a tcm soon to nurse back my health.
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Sorry abt ur loss..

I took pill orally. From Friday if u jab until nw still spotting maybe u wan to see gynae or call them to ask ?
Worry for any infection inside ...

Bai feng wan got a mix of reviews. If u seeing tcm why not consult ur tcm practitioner before u tk bai feng Wang.
 
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