Support group - Miscarriages

hi sandy, hope your tests will show that everything's ok. at least after that u can be an1 xin1 and prepare to ttc. no exercises for you for the time being i think.

i saw both parts of in the womb. it's so amazing what the babies actually do while they are in the womb.
 


hi xuanting, looks like I'm not the only owl here ;b thanks, I think u'r rite, aft results of test I'll b more at ease and then move on fm there...

yah, din know they can play games inside the womb! So cute...

Orh, when should I start exercising again? I'm quite active by nature but 'cos of preg I stopped all physical activities...
 
hi sandy, i'm not sure when you can resume exercising but to be safe, i think a month ba. i'm online most of the time (except v late at night). how about u? eversince my mc, i've become almost compulsive in reading about fertility and conception.
 
hi mspiggy
Hmm.. Im not sure abt how to track irregular cycle then.. maybe can use OPK to track? Abt $0.85 each.


Hi xuanting
Thanks for the info
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Just now I itchy hand went to test HPT.. BFN!!
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Seems like all the pregnancy test kits here can only test after AF due? Or is there any whereby we can test before AF due?
 
roxyz, relax! let it be a pleasant surprise! hee. Initially i was really itchy hand too. after the dnc, i just stopped at it.. told myself if AF comes, it will come. hee. The kits can only test after AF due. I got my bfp the day after menses due this time round. If you wanna test early, can go doc's for blood test. good luck!
 
Hi Apple, do you all mean after the rise in temp, and it remains high if pregnant if not it will go down to roughly before the rise?

Hi Kit_mum, my gynae also did not do any scan on my 1st visit after D&C. Only when i started my 1st cycle then wanted to make sure everything and womb linning ok then i did a blood test on day 2 and v scan on day 12.

Hi Roxyz, OPK $0.85 each? The clear blue kit 7 test for abt $50-60? which brand u referring to? Also, still early ya. Relax, dun be too stress
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hi gals,

did u all take any other supplement other than folic acid? I'm eating chinese medicine to tiao my body..

Eunice, i will be meeting my gynae in sept...may be that will be the review of my womb condition again ba..... din do any blood test so far leh.....
 
hi xuanting, I've got wireless network at m & at work so will pop in & chk whenever free ;) When preg also read alot of stuff online, now slowing dn... Maybe not planning to ttc so soon, prob end of the year ;b

Hi Eunice, I also thk now scan a bit too early... maybe I wait until my next menses come (6 weeks) then go followup instead of going in 2 weeks' time... Somemore everytime scan & consultation cost me $100 ;( what bld test did u take?

Hi Kit_mum, dr also ask me to start tking folic acid though I told him specifically that I wun b trying within these 6 months... My mum said to buy 'bai feng wan' or something to 'bu' the womb... Nurses said multi vit is good. Also gave me free sample of frisomum for preg, said miscarriage also can drink 'cos got lots of vit...
 
hi kit_mum2b, i'm also taking chinese med to tiao2 my body. at the moment not taking anything else cos i just want to get my body back to balance first; after reading up on tcm properties of different types of food/tonic i realised that not everything that's bu3 is suitable for everyone. did your tcm doc say how long more you have to take the med? mine i think will take a while. each time i go back, he adjusts the prescription according to my progress and tells me what i should eat or avoid for that period till i see him again.

sandy, my gynae also said to take folic 3 months before ttc and once test positive, i should quickly go see doc to get duphaston prescription cos of my mc history.

roxyz, when is your af due? now just do positive reinforcement ba. close your eyes, put your hands on your stomach and tell the healthy, fertilised egg to burrow into a good and secure spot so mommy can see a bfp soon!
 
was in this thread before during Nov 06 as i had a miscarriage and when thru a induced labour.. manage to get preggie again in Feb 07 and tot all is ok until i lost my bb girl again on 28June07 and was 21weeks then. My cervix dilated suddenly and was rushed to hosiptal to do a emengency ops to stitched back my cervix as by then was fully dilated. Complete bed rest at the hospital but after 10days, my waterbag still bursted. The stitches couldnt hold my cervix... went thru another induce labour and i lost my bb girl. Deep inside i try very hard to be strong, but going thru all this again and again, i am mentally drained.

i dunno if i have to courage to try again...but guess cervix incompetent is my issue... just wan to come here and talk to someone and hope time will heal
 
applemuffin,
thanks so much for the info!

sandy,
my gynae did send the sac for lab test, and i will be seeing her again for scan and results next week. she didnt mentioned abt blood test though.

angela,
am really sorry to hear abt your incident. really hope you can be strong and get over this soon.

getting it out of our system is good that's why i also decided that i shd not be keeping it and must talk it out. *HUGS*
 
hi xuanting and xbliss...
My AF is only due next Tues.. hopefully got good news.. if not just be positive and try harder
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hi eunice
There is a website helpyouttc.blogspot or something that sells opk and hpt at $0.85/$0.90 each. Quite effective. I used the OPK to strike last time.

Hi Angela
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Hope you can be strong and don't give up
 
hi angela, i'm sorry to hear about your experiences. this isn't something that's easy to come to terms with. do give yourself time to grieve. hugs.
 
Hi angela
Sorry to hear your experience. Hope you give yourself sometime to grieve and come to terms. Do come in and chat whenever you feel like it.

I had a colleague whose case was similar. She lost 1 at 5th mth. Then for subsequent pregnancies, she had to had her cervix sewed at 12 weeks and remove the stitches at 36weeks. She went on to have 2 successful pregnancies after.

There is always hope in life, let us all be blessed with lovely babies in our arms soon.
 
hi angela, don't be disheartened. Like what Linda says, probably gotta take more precautions next time. I know what you mean when you say drained. I'm in my second pregnancy after having mc with induced labor last Dec and i also told myself to take a long break if it doesn't work out cos it's psychologically very stressful. But one thing that i know is that none of us here are having kids "for fun". If we genuinely love kids and still have hope (i dun even dare say ability), no harm trying.

I know i can't say anything that makes you feel better cos i went through this too. But do come here and talk it out. I like that pple here are really supportive and at the end of the day, i leave this site a more hopeful person.
 
xuanting,
I will go and see my tcm when i finished my medicine (ard 10 plus days)... the first time i see her, she said i have to tiao 2 months before i can try again... everytime she also re adjust my medication according the my condition.. the last time i see her, she said i jin feng (got wind)... got to wear more clothes to keep warm esp during sleeping... and air con places.... she even ask me to wear long sleeves to go out if possible... but i really cannot tahan the weather.. think i'll got heat stroke if wear that... but i do put a shawl ard my shoulder area to cover a bit.... how abt u? wat did the doc say?
 
hi kit_mum2b, mine is also around 12 to 14 days like that. initially when really out of balance was 7 days per visit so he can monitor more closely. do you have to wear long sleeves in non aircon places too? does that also mean you have to bathe with warm water, avoid baths or soaking your feet? mine is lots of deficiencies with fake heat symptoms which he warned will become worse if i anyhow drink liang2 things to cool off. tomorrow is my next visit and i am so looking forward to it to see if i've improved.
 
angela, fren, i am very sad and sorry to hear your news...dunno what to say...wish i am there to give you a hug...time will heal...if you need any anything, someone to talk to, just call me.
 
eunice, if there is no preggie, the temp will dip and remain low, then AF will come.

kitmom, i am also taking folic and multi vit..
think i bu too much, kana sore throat now..sigh...

sandy, when i had my 1st mc, the gynea also did a test on the foetus but no test on me. when i had my 2nd mc, my gynea suggested more intensive tests (blood, chromosome, foetus). When i had my 3rd mc, my gynea also did test on foetus.
 
roxyz, try to "luan" until tues
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temp still high? if still high, yr chance is v good...

i started taking bbt 3 days ago..today it dropped to 36.24, think AF coming soon...i am quite happy cos it means i can start ttc soon..
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Morning ladies...sad sad... temp was still very high, dis morn suddenly dip by 0.4 to all time low of 36.4... I couldnt believe my eyes when saw the reading... no need to wait for AF to report liao.. confirm BFN and AF should be reporting soon. Make me so sad early in the week.... haiz, another failed cycle
 
thanks everyone.

I keep telling myself to be strong but deep inside i guess reali take along time to get over what happened.. " Why me " having 3 MC and 2 induced was reali a big big blow.. Will try very hard to pick up the bits ang pieces and rest for a while for the time being.

My gynae did mention that next time i must do the stitches at 12weeks and the chances of holding he pregnancy is over 80%.. for now as my cervix oredi dilated and stitched so only 30% chance. But is still not 100% and if touch wood if i have to go thru again i tink i will go crazy...

Apple, hope you are coping well as reali dint hear from u for a while.

I am reali happy to be here talking to u gals as it reali make me feel all of u are there to give support to eachother.
 
roxyz,
dont give up... JIA YOU!
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Angela,
rest well for the time being. Will pelvic exercise helps for your case? Gynae said pelvic exercise will strength it... maybe you can try doing it daily.
 
roxyz, dont be disheartened or sad okie..dont give up till AF comes..

angela, i am ok. life goes on...did shut myself out from the world for a long time...now slowly coming out, but only to certain ppl, esp those who truly understand how i feel. I know frens, relatives care but they dont understand and i dunno how to react if they start consoling me...so avoid lor..

Are you doing yr confinement now? how long medical leave yr gynea give you? Need help?
fren, i understand how u feel...truly...alot of why why why...time is the best healer..maybe by talking about it, will also help you to heal..take care girlie.
 
dear all, How's everyone?? I hv not come in for a while, been bz with work, trying to slow things down at work, but can't seem to, so sian... i finished my second AF and supposed to be o now, so tempted to ttc, but decided to wait till after 3rd AF... has anyone here TTC after second AF? would it be ok?

also i started buying clothes that I can wear for preg, has anyone done that? i m beginning to think am I going too far? if i dun get preg, then I would be so disappointed...

hi Angela, it must have been hard on u...take gd care of yourself...

roxyz,relax k? stress would not help... if this month realy din strike...next month try harder....btw, what is BFN?

apple... *HUGZ* cheer up k? cos all babies would want a happy mummy!!

cheers.
 
Hi Sandy, took only the usual hormone test..FSH etc. But when i showed the results to the TCM doc, she actually commented that the blood test is useless, should test something else but i not sure what as she thinks I should tiao my body b4 she will recommend me. But the blood test is ordered by my gynae.

Hi Angela, take time to grieve. don't bottle up yr feelings. write to us. m sure all of us here would be most willing hear you out. take good care of yourself in the meantime. know will not be easy on you but try, okie?
 
Hi to all.. hope all is well.

Angela.. Take good care psychologically, emotionally and physically... I know it's hard on you but hang on tight! There are a lot of people supporting and loving you.. *Hugs*
 
hi Irene
BFN is Big fat negative and BFP is big fat positive. I have lotsa of pregnancy clothes too...bought last time and last month also when I decided to try again.

Thanks to all for their consolation here. This morning when I sms hubby the news he also got very worried for me. Feel even worse when my colleagues around me keep talking about their children this, their children that. Their children is only a few months old. Sometimes I feel like shouting to them can they shut up please and be more sympathetic about m/c women situation and stop mentioning their children in front of us.


Angela and apple, both of you dun give up k? I'm sure that one fine day we will be able to hold our little ones in our arms. Someone posted the link to the blog about Ashley and Joash. Angie, the mummy had m/c last year but went on to be pregnant with twins. Joash died a few mths later in her womb and Ashley was delivered and died less than a day later. When I saw her little body in the little coffin, I was wondering why is life so unfair? But if they can move on, so mush everyone of us here
 
thanks irene n roxyz, i am an energizer bunny, never give up!! hee.. I am waiting for 3rd AF to come before starting ttc again. I still have hope that one day i will hold my own baby in my arms..

..and now these three remains, faith, hope, love..
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Hi Apple,

Yes i am at home doing confinement but mainly i am alone as people around me need to work. Doing this again i tink i can manage myself. Mainly i just cook myself as all the food are preared in advance by my mum. I am given 1month medical leave but HB dint want me to go back to work so soon and want me to just rest at home as long as i could. I dunno... maybe is just beta to work then staying home and think of the unhappy incident right? Physically i am reali ok, but not mentally. Just s hard to come to terms why i have to go thru so many times of mc..

Hi gals...

I know all of us have being thru the same paths, and i am reali happy you gals even pick up the bits and pieces and trying to start again and try again. Never give up as i know we will be a mother one day and havng a healthy bb in our arms. The road ahead wont be easy but having eachother supports do make a great differences. For me, i reali dunno when i will have the courage to try again as i just cant take it that my babies just left like tat.. I rather i am the want dying instead of them. Being here talkng to you gals make me feel beta in fact, just need a little bit more time to get over and find myself back.
 
Angel,
U need help with grocery, magazine whatever, sms me. I agree with yr HB that you need more rest. Office aircon, walking about, carrying stuff is no good. Outside food also not as healthy and nutrious as home-cooked food. Can yr HB take time off toward the end of yr medical leave to go for a short holiday? Maybe just sentosa, i know they have couple of new resorts newly opened. Good to get away for a while..

Sometimes i also dunno why it had to happen so many times...I have gone thru those periods myself, asking so many questions, scenarios kept running in my head, asking myself what if i do this, what if i do that etc. Then i reconcile to myself by thinking perhaps God wants to use me as a living testimony to others? Then i ask why me? Then i realise i cannot keep go in circle, i need to move on cos life is so realistic, no one will wait for me to feel better, i still need to work for a living, bills still waiting to be paid...someone once said, after a D&C, everything has passed, we should look forward and believe the next pregnancy will be a healthy one. I chose to be hopeful and hope i can too write a beautiful ending to my ttc effort....

Angel, you will have yr beautiful ending too...just persevere ok...
 
Hi Angela,
Havent come into this thread for a while...so sad for you...I know telling you to be strong now may not work and it might be even harder...

take yr time to recover and dont think abt TTC for a moment..I am sure you will be a proud mother soon as you have proven that u can conceive at least within 6 months!

Take care and we are all here to support u
 
Apple,

we do not hv the answer why me when stillborn or miscarriage happen to us...
I ask also but the more I ask, the more I will feel troubled n hv a heavy heart..
My pastor n cell friends also dont hv the answer, there is even a couple in my church ministered to me as they also go through numerous m/cS but still hv stong faith n peace in their heart with God. trusting Him still
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THey said that we will only hv the answer when we go to heaven and God is sovereign.

I still remember before wedding, went for pre marriage counselling and my marriage counselling pastor asked us: what if our marriage' will we wont hv any children??
Kind of harsh isit? But this is reality becos there are many healthy couples who are happily married but just cant hv kids. They live with it but thinknig salvation of their soul is more important than anything else
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I am so amaze and impress...


Wah I was so encourage by them!
so gal, no matter what God is sovereign!
Amen!
 
happyger, i believe time is the best healer. Memories might linger but time will ease or take some of the pain away..

As for sovereignty, i choose to leave it for a while..hope for understanding...
 
yes time is the healer but we need to allow God to help us release the heart of pain, anger, frustration, jealousy, disappoinments to Him and let Him bear all these..so that His peace, love, joy , hope, faith and assurance can be replace in our heart.
well I can say that I hv overcome all these, but it takes me over a yr since my stillborn, it's not easy...
so gal, take ur time to grief but no matter what still hv eventually go back to God's loving arms n wings okie? do nt lost ur soul or salvation becos of the enemy/devil attack
 
angela... hugz hugz hugz...

apple.... we are waiting for the same thing now... we try our best!!

roxyz... at least i feel normal now... just now i almost wanted to buy another loose top, can;t help it leh, all the clothes now are good as preg clothes....but i stopped myself, better not go overboard...
 
hi irene, nice to see u! how many dresses did u buy? i think u shd just do whatever makes u happy and helps in looking forward.
happy.gif
good mood makes good eggs!

roxyz, more time to tiao2--> stronger egg--> smoother pregnancy--> healthier bb! it's disappointing but think of it as good things take time to make ba. god placed one special order for a 100% lovingly handcrafted, high quality baby for you liao, must wait or he will give you an off-the-rack mass-produced one instead! i read abt angie and her three bbs too. very sad case. i really hope she'll give birth to a strong healthy baby one day.

hi angela, i think motherhood is something most ppl take for granted. mine was an early and uncomplicated mc and while i was sad for a while, i felt even angrier reading about experiences of others who had to go through the same ordeal so many times. just cannot understand why the path to parenthood must be paved with so much difficulties and painful memories for some of us. like applemuffin said, thinking about it and attempting to reason it out is just going round and round in circles. but i think it's a necessary step towards healing as long as you don't keep getting stuck in that roundabout! from your posts, i believe u're a tough cookie but if you need to cry or something, just let it out ok.
 
reading the blog of joash and ashley just brought tears to my eyes. Sometimes life is really cruel isn't it? In the difficult times, i think we would wanna kick those who tell us that "there is a reason for everything". But then again, so many things are beyond our control. Do hang in there everyone, esp Angela. Can still see the disappointment and sorrow in your posts. Not that they should disappear, but hopefully you heal and find a safe place in your heart that you can lock it up and move on.

roxyz, try again next month, k? i believe in stronger eggs, smoother pregnancy too.
 
Hi Ladies,

I've just have had a natural miscarriage last Wed, was very upset and I remembered crying hysterically into the night and finally cried to sleep.

Now, I'm waiting for it to clear up and taking TCM to "tiao li" my body.

Hope the next one will come soon & healthy!
 
hi gals,
I have seen my chinese doc today... she said must wait 2 cycles to try.... sigh... long wait............ my first AF still not here yet... and also i bought a thermometer to track my BBT... so ex one huh... i bought for 19 puls from guardian...

saw ashley's pic and the coffin... my heart really pain... and i can't imagine how angel went thru the whole process.. she must be one strong mummy... so gals,,, dun give up... she can be so strong.... and so do we....dun give up hope ok...
 
hi eternity_star, are you still bleeding now? very important to take care now; are you doing any mini confinement?

hi kit_mum2b, i saw mine today too! i'm responding to the medication but got a long way more to go before i can ttc cos of my poor constitution. the good thing is, small things are improving along the way. two cycles will be here in no time la, kit. eat really well and sleep really well these two months ba. is your hubby eating any bu3 stuff? must remember to bu3 him also. jia1 you2!
 
Hi ladies,

happen to see so many old friends (ah-kat, happygers, gina ...) back in tis thread. Seems like many of us are jus silent readers nowsaday...awy, I am sure all of us here will be proud mother one day. Lets stay confident and positive...jiayou!
 
Hi ladies

Reading all your encouragement made me cry.... Many a times I have also asked the same question, why me? And have nearly given up on God. Actually God never give up on us, it's us who gives up on God. And I wanted to throw in the towel for ttc also...now i understand why pple get so stressed over ttc. But after reading all your encouragement, I shall not give up and be strong!! Thanks gals
 
Hi ladies,
i kept telling u gals to be strong but i know it's really hard. since my D&C, i had difficulty falling asleep and out of no reason tears will just roll down. guess am not that alright afterall.

but i kept telling myself i have to be strong! let's JIA YOU together!
 
xbliss, exact sentiment..but i know i wont kick and dont want to kick, so i chose to avoid and hope for understanding from ppl who care and from the one above....

meanwhile, i am staying hopeful and keeping the love for HIM warm in my heart...

I guess the sure success to ttc is a never-give-up attitude. There is always a chance n hope that the next one will be a perfect gift from above...we will get there....i am sure.
happy.gif
 
Hi Xuanting,

The bleeding has more or less stop le, now it's just abit of spotting, will be seeing a Gynae next Wed to do a checkup and see if there's anything wrong with me becos I went to see the Chinese Physician at Ying Chuan and she refer me to Chris Chen which I dun think I will be seeing after reading some posts from this forum. Currently, I'm on 2 wks of her medication to "tiao li" my body and I'm doing sort of mini-confinement too. Just avoiding cold stuff for the time being!
happy.gif


Hi All Ladies,

Like everyone here, these couple of nights I too have difficulty sleeping at times and it seems I'm giving hubby a hard time too as I can just break down for no reason. He told me he feels very heart pain everytime he sees me cry haiz...I know I've to be stronger than ever.

Let's just hope that we will get our "little miracle" real soon!
happy.gif
 
is just very hard not to cry.. is just like a piece of out meat cut away from us... i had a hard time trying to sleep as i miss my bb kicking me.. i know she is not inside me anymore but i just cant help holding on to my tummy and cry. I try very hard not to cry when the is others around as i know they are equally sad, so when i am alone i cry as much as i could as deep inside is just so painful.

Hope the path ahead for all of us will be easier.
 

xuanting,
how to bu hubby? wat shd he eat? he got high blood pressure, so i no dare to give him anything bu... wait blood pressure shot up...
 
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