Not too sure if im having prenatal depression but would like to share my situation and if possible get some advice.. Pardon the long post..
Im currently in my 6 mths pregnancy, unwed due to father dont want the child. He said that it is a plot to force him to be with me. I told him if one can have a baby as and when wanted, there wont be so many couples TTC for so long. Given my medical condition and age of 34, i am not easily conceived. So inclusion, father not in picture.
Decided to keep the baby as not able live with the guilt of killing a life. Broke the news to old parents and siblings, they din approved but also did not reject. But my old parents have mood swing and anger management issue where they will kinda go crazy once in awhile and complaining to me on all sorts of small issue. All these is adding on to my stress level.
I am the only one supporting the old parents (siblings married and not contributing), i faced financial concern. They are not able to help me care for the infant, thus will need to either get a nanny or infant care which cost min. $1k per mth. Not that my pay cant sustain, but it will be just nice without putting aside of some savings.
At work, i missed the opportunity of getting a promotion and increment, which made me disappointed and losing the faith in working hard. Thus, to the eyes of many, my quality of work seems to be dropped. No longer that "on" to work overtime like last time.. And some already knew im pregnancy out of wedlock, thus, gossips here and there, which i have expected..
Been crying, and thinking of giving my little boy up for adoption so he is given a chance to grow up in a normal family which the govt has been promoting - a family nuclear formed with 2 parents. But i cant bear with it.. The thoughts of giving him up...
So much to think of and all that stressed me up, especially when i need to put up a normal front despite all those sleepless nights..
Im currently in my 6 mths pregnancy, unwed due to father dont want the child. He said that it is a plot to force him to be with me. I told him if one can have a baby as and when wanted, there wont be so many couples TTC for so long. Given my medical condition and age of 34, i am not easily conceived. So inclusion, father not in picture.
Decided to keep the baby as not able live with the guilt of killing a life. Broke the news to old parents and siblings, they din approved but also did not reject. But my old parents have mood swing and anger management issue where they will kinda go crazy once in awhile and complaining to me on all sorts of small issue. All these is adding on to my stress level.
I am the only one supporting the old parents (siblings married and not contributing), i faced financial concern. They are not able to help me care for the infant, thus will need to either get a nanny or infant care which cost min. $1k per mth. Not that my pay cant sustain, but it will be just nice without putting aside of some savings.
At work, i missed the opportunity of getting a promotion and increment, which made me disappointed and losing the faith in working hard. Thus, to the eyes of many, my quality of work seems to be dropped. No longer that "on" to work overtime like last time.. And some already knew im pregnancy out of wedlock, thus, gossips here and there, which i have expected..
Been crying, and thinking of giving my little boy up for adoption so he is given a chance to grow up in a normal family which the govt has been promoting - a family nuclear formed with 2 parents. But i cant bear with it.. The thoughts of giving him up...
So much to think of and all that stressed me up, especially when i need to put up a normal front despite all those sleepless nights..