Premature babies support group


kkf and fairylander...

congrats that you will be enjoying the new babies benefits.
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kkf
You are on unpaid leave, wonder you are entitled to the 4 mths maternity leave or not.....? Your baby due in Feb, same like A.
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kkf & precious,
ws oso feb bb
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yan,
the last time i oso visited my bb everyday in hospital. there's a rm in the NICU, 4 me to pump. i'm sure there's a rm in the hospital 4 pumping. so u no need to miss a pump. b persistent.. initially i oso no milk. but i juz kept on pumping like 8times per day. then i manage to give her breastmilk till 8mths. q proud of myself 4 being so persistent.. jia you!!
 
mommies, those mommies tat complain to www.reach.gov.sg actualy manage to get govt to bring forward the benefits to 17 august..i had already postd somecomments under page 22 abt premmies..perhaps more of u wan to make some noise? btw, no call from straits times..i suspect they dunwana publish my letter...

and for thse with today newspapers..today the little corner abt family..gave a poem abt losing a child... i read it on the mrt and nearly cry on the spot (that will be so embarassing! :p)

daec, yes, agree that pace in other countries is slower so that they can do this kind of adjustments more easily...

shelllow, congrats that paige will be having her hernia op soon
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dm..wah.. good trip!
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ws must have missed u so much.. did she go to airport to pick u up? :p i did mention cleft lip too . but i din have the cost for that

precious_one..wah.. why they automatically downgrade her after 1 night..tahts very nice of them!

xbliss..sorry i have already emailed to ST..but no news..so dont think they are publishing my letter... maybe bryan is overstimulated?

yan, what i did last time was to time it so taht i can pump in hospital.. SCN room have a medela hospital grade pump... which i pump then give nurse to store (they provide the bottle too) or let my gal drink for her next round.... no need to bring the milk home.. and yes, can use FM if BM not enuf... unless ur gal is like mine.. throw up fm in the beginning so i die die have to produce bm (thank goodness she outgrow that soon cos my ss is pathetic too!)
 
kkf
interesting. no touch hehe. maybe touched by words, support is enuff ;)

yan
dun say 10ml pathetic leh. whatever amt is gd coz there is something. then the something may get more as long as keep pump and think baby/positve tht u can do it.i also thot myself pathetic express so little, then feel more down. later that my amt become lesser. wah then I wish I could get the earlier amt.

if not enuff FM is ok too lah. dun worry. I prefer BM but if cant, its ok too
 
Bloom
A is a 24 weeker + 4. The welfare dept is fully informed by the neo nat on the conditions of the baby so they anticipated that she would be hospitalised for a long time so they approached me and told me that they auto down grade A to c-ward. That's a consolation then.

yan
I believe other than those blessed with abundant BM, most of us started with 5 to 10ml initially...your supply will come soon. Drink more fluid and eat healthily, you may like to up your calcium intake for your own good. I also eat fish oil capsules then. You have our support here...jia you!
 
mich, thanks, reply you.

precious one, no leh, I am not entitled to the 4 mths maternity cause think if you are taking maternity, you have to work 3-6 months before you start maternity. I am on no pay, so dun think counted. for baby bonus, not beneficial for me too, as mine is considered 3rd child, so 3rd child is entitled to 6000 baby bonus no change.

so overall, i dun benefit at all. sob. but i think govt shd subsidise gynae fees for poor mummy like me leh. I am seeing ann tan, can tell you the costs is wow!!! but no choice for me since i am very very high risk, and ann tan is supposed to be very famous for high risk pregnancy. sigh....i just hope she can create wonders! haha.

honestly, i m just praying hard each day that baby can at least stay in my womb till 28 weeks at least (thats the least). once i get over 28 weeks, think will more or less be more fang xin, and as i have said, week 20-24 is the most crucial, cause i know fully well, like for my 1st boy, they dun save babies between 20-24.
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heartpain...

negative tots again...sigh. ha!

dash is with my in laws, so all alone at home. so sianz.
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yes, i pump before i set off to KK. there is a room in nicu for mommies to express milk. but i would like to accompany my baby a little longer. so i wait till 2 pm then go express. afternoon they have doctors going round, so they very strict on the visiting hours.

gotta pump every 3hourly, very close leh, i stay in woodlands. by the time i pump and take my lunch.. 1 hr 15min are gone liao. then 1/2hr to go KK. so see baby awhile only must go pump liao. tats y i waited till 2pm then pump. sometime the time to pump is late, so i reach KK even later then even lesser time to accompany her..
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kkf,
dun be so negative. just rest well. be happy.
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sure u can celebrate the real full month for this baby.. have faith n yourself and you baby.
 
kkf
Keep your religion faith. Have faith in yourself and the baby inside you. And most importantly Angel Jared is watching over all of you at home. In silence, just say nice things to your baby and look at pretty looking babies pics and handsome Dash's pic. Listen to some soothing music too. Just relax relax and relax. Read comical books to make you laugh.

Just tell you one joke, two weeks ago, I was so tired that I put facial foam on my toothbrush and start brushing....then so much foam was formed, after a while, I realised how come my toothpaste dun taste minty.......wash and guggle my mouth so much but the soap smell was there until I dare not swallow my saliva.....
 
Yan
I can understand the BP stress...after my 1 month confinement, I basically camped at KKH daily from morning till night so that I accompany my girl for 2 hrs in the pm and 2 hrs in the evening. I didn't go home in the day at all cos I stay at CCK and the travelling will make me more sleepy. I lunch and dine at KKH for 5 months to be exact until the canteen operator thought I was working in KKH.
 
wow precious one.. u steady leh..
ya.. now only get to see my gal once a day... but i can´t camp in KK like u leh.. cos i have a 28mths old gal at home.. now she already very attached to the maid. if i do the same as u, i think she will forget about me. i hospitalised in kk for about 8 days, she become even more attach to the maid. now whenever she wake up, she only want the maid, dun even want me leh..
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Yan
Can understand. I only have one girl so it is easy for me then. Plus owing to a difficult pregnancy, I was confined in bed since Day 1 so I have to quit my job too. With a baby born so prematurely...being a 1st time mum, I buay pan sim go find work. During confinement is the most difficult cos hubby only allowed me to see my daughter for a few mins in the evening only. It was so worrying then.

You need not worry too much about the elder one too attached to your maid, cos at the end of the day, she knows who's the mummy. Moreover, she now has a little sis, so elder one also needs adjustment, attention seeking stage....just assure elder one that you love her the same as the little one.
 
precious one,

wah.. you are havng a very hard time during pregnancy..i was confned in bed for a week felt boby achng all over liao.. but i really hope tat now she still inside me.. i rather suffer than she suffer. i can undrestand how you feel, i see her in the afternoon for 1hour plus, i also dun feel enough... so just few mins, where got enough.

ya.. but like to spend some time with her too.. cannot focus all on the baby sister.. sometime i feel so guilty tat i dun have enough time to play with her..now i not working.. so like to spend sometime with her too.. maybe will consider alternate day ¨camping¨ in KK ... at least she can get to see me too..

now i dunno wanna quit my job or take unpaid leave after baby out of hospital.. but i think we stll need my income.. i dun wanna my hubby to be too stress out on financial issue..

share some joy with you gals..
today after my baby poo poo. she was so stressed up.. her heart beat even reached 200.. scary..and she kept cryng.. the nurse tried to comfort her, but she still crying. then she asked me wanna try comforting her.. i quickily washed my hands and do wat the nurs taught me.. and then withn seconds.. her heart beat went back to normal!!
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and she hold on to my thumb.. i felt so glad that i managed to calm her down.. she look so relax and contented... but too comfortable liao that she forgotten to breath..errr...... so i stroke her back, move her hands and the reading back to normal again
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i am so happy tat i can do something for her..
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hi yan

u post so late? i think most of the mummy is in bed.

Yes so qiao our baby is born same day and same gestation age. just different year and different gender

i read your post on balancing between pumping milk and spending time with your ger. Just to share what i did when my boy was in KKH. at first i also am quite lost how to pump and then still have time with him. so what i did (in NICU) is i catch their milk feeding time. i always go in and tell the nurse that i am going to pump, wait for my 'fresh delivery milk;. then i quickly pump (just enough for his that day feed). then i spend time with him..

when he is in SCN, by then i was back at work, so i only manage to go during evening time (haha just to share with u, i got to know costa there). so once i am there around 7pm, i quickly go and pump and i stay till around 9pm...then i go home (i live in the west - jurong)...

during weekend, i (too live far), so i also kind of camp at KKH until at night...

Yan, persist. at least your elder ger is ok with your maid... yes like precious_one say, they know who their mummy is....

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I am quite certain you have the power of mama. i am sure your younger ger will progress fast. You are one brave mummy. take good care of yourself. Good night...sleep early. i am sure tomorrow you be shuttling between KKH and home. Send my hugs to your 2 sweet ones.
 
oh yan
i got the musical toy from "first few year" at KKH. YOu see, sometime during weekends, 2 years back, during doctor walk around I am not allowed in the SCN/NICU. hence i have to find some form of relaxtion, so i shop often around the KKH retail shops.


disneymickey
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i find ws active pah..not chor lor.. she so sweet ler.

kkf
We have a date next february ;) at your house wink wink. stay postitive... rest, relax and stay happy...
 
awww...me cannot liao. me going to sleep because tomorrow have to wake up early.

good night all my mummies friend in this forum and babies. sleep tight (its a cold cold night).

to yan and shelllow who baby is in the hospital (under good care). 2 of u must try to rest more.
 
Thanks mummies, will try to stay positive!

Precious one, thanks for your joke, haha.

Yan,your gal will be home soon...think she just needs to gain weight. tell u,my boy is also not close to me, he is super close to his grandpa. Whenever he grandpa comes, he will stick to him like superglue, and when he wants to leave, my boy will cry to kick a fuss. Sometimes also felt heartpain, like why har? I never see him stick to me like that leh.

Jane, yes, hopefully!haha,i also used to shop ard kkh when my boy was in nicu, and also in children icu when he had his heart surgery. I still remember walking around too see wat to buy for him, n to make myself felt better.

precious one, you were confined in bed since day 1? This pregnancy,I can say I am like that too. I never step out of the house unless visiting gynae or occassionally to my mum's house. Most of the time, I am either sitting or lying in bed. Getting more like a pig each day, weight gaining a lot. Life is so boring.
 
sometimes, i felt bad. I am thinking, I should just have dash and be contended. why let myself suffer, and my baby too? sigh...

negative tots again. :p
 
fairylander, kinda worry about u leh, are you ok?
how are u coping with your pregnancy? lets give each other support!
 
Jane Jane,
Yup, me too, when my boys were in KKH, I was also into shopping in KKH
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sometimes when I need to wait for my hb after spending sometime in the NICU/ SCN I will even go to orchard/ bugis from there
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see, I am so into shopping
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maybe during that time was more of de-stress (what a lame excuse !)
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haha, same here didi, i will go bugis too, but mostly to pray.

but i remember when my boy was in nicu, most of the time, i would have to rush home to pump milk.

It was when i stayed in macdonald family room when dash had his surgery and needed to stay for a week in children icu, then i really shopped in kkh and bugis.
 
kkh,
so ya, usually after the shopping then I will return to kkh to pump 'fresh milk' ha.... otherwise the 2 peaks are like rocks-hard, scary
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kkf,
dun think so much la. try 2 read some comics or wwatch some comedy..

think boys r like tat. i c my nephew, oso v close with grandpa. at 1 point, my SIL oso jealous, but now tat she has another bb to take care of, i think she's glad 2 hav someone 'entertaining' the boy. oso, maybe it's the "men's thing", sometimes, mommies can't play rough with him, whereas daddy or grandpa can. so he's prob closer to grandpa. whereas girl will b closer to mommy & ah ma.

okie. v tired. gg zzz.. tmrw still need go work
 
jane,
thanks..
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all mommies here are brave and strong..

u mean just enough for tat feed or the whole day feed? if just pump a bit then stop, will tat affect the supply? cos my supply not in yet.. super super low(10-15ml only).. so if dip further,, i faint ah...

just went first few years today.. never mind tomorrow can go again.. hee...

i cannot shop too much now.. cos dunno wat the hospital bill will be like, so dare not anyhow spend. dunno how long she gotta stay there... hmm...


kkf,
heartache lor... see them stick to others and not us.. but really bo bian lor...though they know wh ummy is, but i still dun feel good.. :p
 
kkf, didi and yan

KKH is/was like a 2nd home to me..there was one stage i ever wonder when i can stop taking my dinner there and wandering around the shops... then...anyway, its the past.

honestly, that time i was too.. too bored to really step out of kkh (while my boy is there) during weekend too. Weekdays, its always travelling to and from work to KKH then home. which takes quite a lot of time then...

but well, we have all brave the difficut times.

Yan,

:p yes, for that special feed, i pump enought for my boy that whole day feed (like i go 7pm, i pump for the feed enough to last him till next day like that - i try la haha) because i want to spend time with him...and i already got some BM stocked up at NICU so i know... i just have to express enough for his that day feed. if not enough, the nurse will take out those that is stock there...

Dont' think too much about bills and such, thou i know its difficult not to think so much. try focus on your younger ger for now... that time i did not really spend a lot too (ie before i know when my boy can be discharged).

hmm from what i know from this forum, most of the baby go home on or slighty before their actual EDD.

Re expressing BM. just continue to DO it. the flow will come..jia you okie! you can do it... otherwise, FM is also as good. its the love that we give to our kids that is unreplaceable.

I wonder...do you know of a notice board outside NICU? that time..before i came to know of this forum, thats where all my fighting spirite came from. i read all the stories and somehow, i found my heart become stronger ... and i pull myself up.

kkf
don't think so much ler... hey why don't u try organise some simple BP??? those light light items? pass time? i know it can be very bored to stay at home...cheer up okie

fairylander has not beeng logging in hor..maybe busy ah..
 
jane,
my supply super low so i not able to pump and last her throughout..
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yesterday she incresased the feed to 4ml 2 hourly.. i only can express about 10ml each session.. so need to have at least 5 sessions of expressing to last her for a day for now. so i can´t affort to miss..
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breast milk.. breast milk.. please come in.. baby needs u....(ha.. i m gong crazy liao.....)

kkf,
ya.. find something to do.. else u will hu si luan xiang again..
 
hi yan,

did you check with the lactuation nurse? i think... shelllow ger is in SCN.. maybe can PM her?

shelllow,
Paige getting ready for home soon?
 
Yan,
My gal is in SCN, i'm there everyday during the evening.

Jane,
Finally manage to postpone her hernia surgery till after the 7th mth. Perhaps in 2 wk time she will be home i hope... she had blood transfusion on sat, just cant bear to see her like tt... to destress, i been shoppin n shopping buying things tt i dont even need...
 
jane,
yes, i saw 4 lactaton nurses already..hmm.. even.. now on medication to increase the milk supply.. but almost a week already still no improvement..

this morning i so guilty leh..din manage to wake up at 2.30 am to pump. by the time i woke up, almost 6am already... urgh.....think is the soup i drank last night that make me sleep so deep.. got DOM in the soup.. i can´t take alchol well...so i pumped once at 6am and then 8am to pump again to make up the lost..
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later 11am pump again..

your boy also 26 gestation.. how long he stay in hospital? any complication? wat is the bill like?
i read from books.. that they might have development problem lah.. ROP lah.. earring impairment lah.... and all sorts of complications.. aiyo... see liao so worried leh.. especially now she still have this high desenity brain problem.. i dunno it will clear up by itself anot.. doctors said they can do anything about.. just hope it will clear up on its own.. sigh....

shelllow,
timing not right
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.. i always go in the afternoon. my hubby go on the evening.

ya. see them on blood tansfusion, heartache.. my baby just borned 13 days but have 3 times blood transfusion already... sigh..sad...
if shopping can help u to destress.. then just do it.. but be more selective on wat u buy..
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hi shellow,
i see. oh then maybe can arrange for yan to meet up with u...

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is home more or less ready for home coming? yes blood transfusion is .... but its a need so... anyway, am glad paige is going home soon. are you going to take leave to take care of paige? anyone at home helping?
 
kkf
Yes, I was confined in bed since Day 1. Knowing the pregnancy news was a joy for few hours only cos I was spotting at the same time. The next morning went to take jab...very quickly, I was told to CRIB if I want to keep my pregnancy cos I was bleeding (worst than having mensus). Even when visiting gynae - I was wheel chair bound. So depressing....so my weight gain is minimal cos my morning sickness stretch until 2 weeks before A's pre-matured arrival. Siong! That's why even my hb, in-laws and I will have 2nd thoughts of having 2nd one. My hb strictly said NO. ILs said one is good enough. Me....very scared cos age is catching up and really the whole experience to me was a Nightmare! I think I should said that my life most critical times was from Sept 2004 to Nov 2007. I pray and hope that my journey home will be blessed and smooth liao.
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Yan,
I have actually just PM u... we chat on PM. its been 2 years down the road for me. but then again, each baby is different. here in this forum, we belive very much in miracle. thats why there is a nick for premature baby as mircale baby
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. believe in what they can achieve and they will achieve it.

my boy has hearing impairment (he can listen very well with hearing aids), i told all the mummy in this forum.

must belive in your ger. she is a brave fighter. stay strong with her. in mind and in heart. have faith!

that time (i was a new mummy) i look at the posters outside NICU and found my heart... sometime tears dropped but then again, smile is on my face as and when my boy achieve another milestone.

my boy arrive on 12 Aug 08 and discharged on 22 Nov 2006 (10 days after his EDD).

just to be honest...its very difficult not to feel stress. re BM. don't be stress and don't feel bad. you need rest too...
 
Yan
Please check with lactation consultant again as if I am not wrong, we should not drink soup with alcohol content during EBMing....what we eat, comes out in the BM. Also don't drink pig liver soup as it will drain off your BM. Drink Kidney soup is ok. Not too much ginger (or as for me, I don't put ginger in the soup) cos afraid baby becomes yellow which is also common in premies. Drink lots of fish with papaya soup. To me EBMing is another stress area but if I could overcome it, you can too. During ebming, also don't take sushi/shashimi after your confinement, cos milk will smell of fish and sometimes if baby's stomach not well, will get diarhea. All this learn from NICU nurses.
 
Jane,
so far i think home is more or less ready to welcome Paige home... All the hand me done clothes are too big for her, so went to get her some 'smaller' one... I still have 2 mth of maternity leave, now i m appealling to MCYS see if i m entitle the 4th mth leave... EDD 19 Sept... just tryign my luck... me n my hb will be looking after paige.... got so many rejections from nanny, either say she is small or premature... still lookign for one...
 
shelllow,
for clothes, that time i also got some smaller size one..then..realised they outgrow very fast
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. i see. oh yes, i PM yan too about can send in appeal for premataure baby. hope good news come your way soon.

i see... find one slowly. am sure there is a solution
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shellow
My MIL and own Mother were also afraid to help me with my girl when she was discharged then. They were too terrified so I was left to look after my baby with a not so helpful maid. So can understand why nanny is choosy.
 
Jane,
oh ya, the notice boards help me a lot, everyday I will look at the notice board
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and my dad told me not to worry as there are smaller babies than D&D and they are big and healthy already
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Hi Mummies,

I havent been here for almost 1 year plus liao.dont think anyone remembers me. My gal was born 2 months early.stayed in NICU for 2 months plus. now she is almost 2 years old and doing very well. Just want to say to all mummies must be strong and think positive.

Just want to ask any mummies send their kids to childcare at 2years old?
 
precious one,

was wondering if its ok to send our kids there at a young age as heard that the possibility of them getting sick often is there.esp since they are premmies.

my mil has been taking care of my girl when im working and now she wants us to send her to childcare....sigh...
 
hi didi
yeah... my lao gong was the one who spot the notice board...and from there on, i read the stories posted again and again... i remember got one, the baby boy is 26 weekers too... but cannot remember the exact name liao...

puppyduppy
My boy is 3 months early...born in 2006. he is still being cared for by my mum. the plan is to send him to cc when he is about 2.5 years..
 
Jane

good that your mum can look after ur boy.my mum is working still so she cant take care of my girl during the day. and i have to work cos we need the money....aiyo....
dunno if im being too kiasu a mum...i have frens who send their kids to childcare when they turn 18 months and their kids learn alot from there...one positive thing.but they also fall sick quite often
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puppyduppy
yeah..i am glad my mum is still willing to look after my boy. i had wanted to start him off with half day cc but she told me no hurry for it.

its like having to balance between what my boy can learn in the cc and building up his immune system. for me, at home i try to read more to him and teach him things that is within my ability... thou defintely cannot match those taught in school

yeah...i heard some parents told me, their kids go cc and fall sick quite often.. that is the negative side of it..
 
Jane,

yeah i also read alot and try to teach my gal stuff....its such a tough decision on whether to send her to childcare..another option is to place her with a nanny...but that also has its own set of problems....
 
precious_one, i see... who was ur gynae then?

yan, which part of woodlands are u in? i live in woodlands too
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lsa time me too.. i go during lunch, hb go after work.... ehehehe ur gal loves u leh..
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kkf, got official email from STforum.my letter is rejected... dash is super sticky to his grandpa?

jane, intesting toy..if i have no 2. maybe i will get it too (my gal dismember her cot toy liao...)

shelllow, did u have those 'dragon robes' (those with a string..if yes then can tied tighter... so dont need to get so many smaller clohtes.. i got rejection from nannies too.. luckily found one who had a premmie herself so she knows... where do u live btw, cos my nanny is looking for another bb to take care of now my gal is quite big liao...

puppyduppy, if u r worried how abt getting a nanny till she is abit older?
 


puppuduppy,

precious is right. i sent my ger to half day cc (kinderland) when she turns 2. she took 6wks to completely enjoy it. now she loves it. though on fri, she'll happily declare she's not gg to sch tmrw haha. but every morning, if i dily-daly, she'll rush me & say "mommy hurry up, i wan to go to sch"..

got pros & cons of sending them to sch early la. the biggest con is of cos them falling sick often lor. but tat's bo bian oso. i believe whichever age u send to sch, once exposed, sure will kenna. so i felt 2yr old is enuff. the pros, q a lot actually,
1) she's automatically toilet-trained. peer pressure. she juz came back frm sch 1 day & declared she doesn't wan 2 wear diaper anymore, cos her frens r not wearing

2) she can feed herself after 2mths in sch. though not v accurate, but still feeding. think it's again peer pressure

3) b4 i sent her to sch, she refused to utter a single chinese word. though my parents spoke mandarin 2 her, she'll reply in english. now i'm happy tat she can speak well in both languages. the other day, my mom told me, she took out a chinese story book & narate the story in english all by herself
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the list goes on.. so if anyone ask me, i'm all for gg to sch
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but finding a gd sch is not ez. i'm glad i've found 1.

y dun u go & look c the options avail then discuss w hubby then decide?

good luck
 

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