Parent to a special need child

[sharpsandflats]

Hi,

I'm new around here. I thought I want to find a space to talk about feelings that I don't usually express.

I have a toddler 2yrs+ and a baby 3mo. My toddler is a GDD(global development delay), he has delay in every aspect, gross motor, fine motor, social skills and language. He needs PT, ST, OT and early intervention. But in real life, attending all of the above can be overwhelming, so we're only attending child care (with integrated intervention and in-house therapies) and weekly PT. And currently we're looking at weekly ST too.

Besides GDD, he has febrile seizure. The first time he has febrile seizure he was 14mo. And since then, he has had 12 episodes and every episode is a nightmare for us. We're scheduled for a brain scan this month.

I am a foreigner, my parents and in laws are not staying with us. We do not have domestic helper. And my husband works almost 12 hours a day on weekdays and half day on Saturday (have to work more to pay the hefty bills for all the therapies). I bring my toddler to school and therapies together with my baby.

It's tiring, it's exhausting, it's depressing at times. I always question myself what had caused my son's condition but no answer ever came up, even with genetic testing. I feel very self conscious when I bring my him to playgrounds.

I do not know what I'm seeking by posting this in the forum. Maybe a virtual friendship? Maybe some comfort? Maybe I just need to vent...

I can only pray that by doing all we can, he can progress and hopefully one day, he can take care of himself. That's the ultimate goal. And I pray and pray, my baby is born normal, and will always be.

 

[nazriah]

Hi,
Never ever ever blame yourself your your children's condition. God has choosen you to be among the greatest to take care of these special kids.

My nephew was diagnosed with GDD when he wàs abt 5 or 6. My sis in law knew something was wrong with my nephew and share it with the k1 teacher back then but the kindergarten teacher just brush it off and said that he might just taking his time to learn.
Only when he was in k2, a different teacher approach my sis in law abt this and the case was referred to KKH. It was a long process. He was also enrolled in EPIC classes. Thrice weekly.
Since his intervention was rather late, he was being enrolled to a normal stream primary school. Naturally, he cant cope. Only after 2 years, he managed to get a place in chao yang school. He was happier there. Learn a lot of things. He is in tanglin school at the moment. He is 14years now.

He wasnt and still is not the easiest kid to look after, but we as the caregivers have to keep on talking to them, encouraging them over and over and over again. Its not gonna be easy and never will.

He has his moments of tantrums or fits even, be it at home or outside. It was really stressful even. Just quipped yourself with enough patience. Talk to your partner. Do this together.
My bro and sis in law are lucky that my parents and i stayed with them hence the support they had are better than yours.
But dont despair, try to get support from similar situation parents around. Talk it out. Share experiences. You are not alone.

 

[sharpsandflats]

Hi,
Never ever ever blame yourself your your children's condition. God has choosen you to be among the greatest to take care of these special kids.

My nephew was diagnosed with GDD when he wàs abt 5 or 6. My sis in law knew something was wrong with my nephew and share it with the k1 teacher back then but the kindergarten teacher just brush it off and said that he might just taking his time to learn.
Only when he was in k2, a different teacher approach my sis in law abt this and the case was referred to KKH. It was a long process. He was also enrolled in EPIC classes. Thrice weekly.
Since his intervention was rather late, he was being enrolled to a normal stream primary school. Naturally, he cant cope. Only after 2 years, he managed to get a place in chao yang school. He was happier there. Learn a lot of things. He is in tanglin school at the moment. He is 14years now.

He wasnt and still is not the easiest kid to look after, but we as the caregivers have to keep on talking to them, encouraging them over and over and over again. Its not gonna be easy and never will.

He has his moments of tantrums or fits even, be it at home or outside. It was really stressful even. Just quipped yourself with enough patience. Talk to your partner. Do this together.
My bro and sis in law are lucky that my parents and i stayed with them hence the support they had are better than yours.
But dont despair, try to get support from similar situation parents around. Talk it out. Share experiences. You are not alone.

Thank you Nazriah for the encouragement!

I will try my best to stay strong for my kids! Good to also know that your nephew is doing good now! What all parents want of their children, is to be happy and healthy always!