IVF Mummies-To-Be Support Group

singapoh,

I think in my dreams they are of diff sex but I still cant tell them apart coz they wearing d same.

Not that I wan to follow their rules, I dont want to make them unhappy coz they are so nice to me. Their rules n my mum's are so different. My mum's more easy type. Plus I dont want them to say d same thing again n again.

Now I feel they want to make things clear. I need to tell her dont cook 1 confinement dish coz I definitely wont touch.
 


Singapoh, I usually quiet during weekend coz so many things to do; antenatal class, going to mum's place, visiting my dad...then jus rest and relax and spend quality time with my hubby...

Stroller/carseat, if cannot take out padding how? Jus sun it?

Clothes hor, must die die hand wash is it? I worry that cannot dry by night even if hand wash and hang early in the morning leh...then, can use brush to clean or not? U know, those brush and washing board? My maid brushes v hard one when she was hand washing our clothes and her own clothes now...

For breastpump and bottles, so simply sterilize can liao hor? Dont need any baby detergent right?
 
Skies,
I really agreed with what Singapoh said. Get a CL if you can afford. Yes, I strongly feel that you must bathe during confinement, maybe just wipe your body v often with herbal bath water for the first few days. Do what you are comfortable with, dont make yourself suffer this way. And also, dont be affected too much over this matter even if it turns out to be not so happy, you must relax and rest well after delivery, VERY VERY IMPORTANT!!
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Jia you! You have my moral support!
 
Bing,

If I'm not wrong, KK does the Oscar test much earlier, dats y many pple said may not be accurate as it could b done too early. I checked wif the nurse last week n she said Oscar test shld b done b4 Wk14. Today I'm just going for the blood test n counselling session. The scan is scheduled on 27 Apr in the morning b4 seeing Dr Loh in the afternoon.

Btw, I asked Dr Loh last tues regarding the scan at Camden. He wasn't very supportive leh. So my DH said to do Oscar test first then c how lor. Oh, he has not replied me yet
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stb,
yes I never handwash my bb clothes, only during confinement, my CL handwashed for me. But if you have helper and also she can handwash well, then it is ok. If not, good to just machinewash but separately from our adult clothes, since using different kind of detergent.
 
I think now after I "complained", I feel so much better. Sometimes I think back, I feel so silly.

As for bathing issue, I will insist on my stand to bathe. They not happy I also dont care liao. Now not like last time when they did confinement. My cousin even bring her bb out to shopping during d 1st month.
 
Skies, actually its perfectly fine to bathe during confinement. Like what Singapoh says, pp from China don't bathe in the past as they have 4 seasons and even in summer weather is not as hot as in here. Besides, they do not have fresh water to use. They bathe with river water or water from the deep wells which is both cold and not so clean which is why they need to preboil with herbs and so on. In Singapore, our water is not only clean and we have hot water heater so there's really no reasons to do so. I managed to convince my parents during my previous confinement and I bathed after the 3rd day using normal tap water (just hotter) and towel really dry. (But for the first bath and hair wash I used herbs just to please my mum).
 
skies,

whatever the old pple want you to do, are definitely good for you. no bathing is to prevent you from rheumatism . its really disgusting , but i seriously heard from some pple who never follow strict confinement rules, in the end getting aching bones during rainy days, even at young age such as end thirties.
but nowadays, we can bath, but with herbs..you can bring them to medical hall to convince them. since they are nice to you, u explain nicely to them..im sure there will be a consensus.
 
skies

the last time i had my confinement, i also used the herbal bath.. but i didnt bathe for the 1st 1.5weeks.. u can buy the herbs from hock hua..

if u have no choice and cannot bathe at all, then i suggest at least u have to use hot towel to clean ur breast area, for hygiene purpose...
 
Stb,

if can't take out the padding, use anti bacterial wipes and sun it. Wanna handwash so much bb clothes ah? Not practical lei. U can use netting.

I still wash my son's clothes separately from ours coz I also dump my panties and bra into the machine to wash.

U must wash and sterilize breastpump and bottles before 1st use and everytime after u use them. Just use plain water for the steam sterilizer. High temperature will kill germs.
 
I can't imagine doing confinement in June/July, hottest time of the year without bathing. Can grow fungus. Maybe can use to cook confinement food. Wakaka...
 
stb,
I have the same concerned about bb laundry. i have friends who hand wash cos they dun want the dirty stuff from our clothes to contaminate the bb's.
It's too much hassle to hand-wash so I intend to use washing machine. You can get bb laundry detergent for clothes but it seems it's not good for diapers.
So i may just get mild laundry detergent for all his clothes. I have sensitive skin so if i am fine with it, i guess my bb should be ok.
 
i used komodo baby detergent for my girl since birth... wont dettol be a bit harsh on the newborn's clothes? i used hot water plus a bit dettol to soak the cloth diapers when she started using them from 6 mths onwards..
 
Singapoh

do you have a maid at home? i'm wondering, i have a maid, mil and 3yr old at home, so not sure if i will still need a CL.. it's quite a waste of money to have a CL just to cook my meals right? any advice?
 
skies,
pple say better to handwash cos it saves water and supposingly to be cleaner than machine washed, provided the person who handwashes the clothes does a really good job lor.
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Btw, not only do you have to make sure your breasts are clean for bfg during confinement, but also the stitches and vaginal area must be kept clean too since there will be lochia. So must make sure 'up and down' there are all clean and hygenic wor. :p

Singapoh,
ya I had my confinement last end of May to June, super hot like oven!! Hahaha, you very humourous, can use the fungus to cook confinement food?? kekeke...

bakaholic,
ya, tat's why when machine wash bb clothes, wash them separately from our adult clothings.
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And also do not use too much of the bb laundry detergent for each time, can be too strong n soapy.
 
zaza,
I have been using kodomo bb laundry detergent for my bb's clothes too, very gentle and anti bacterial and smells so 'baby'....
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There are many other brands for bb laundry out there too.

skies,
oh if you are concerned about the drying part, can just let your maid to tumble dry the bb clothes in the washing machine after she handwashed the clothes. This works as fine. My CL did that too.
 
Bakaholic,

I also wash floor rags in my washing machine lei. But after that, I wash the WM. It has a washing function. Just add detergent without laundry. Clear the filter nia.

My rags got doggy hair but I dun get it on my clothes.
 
July,

I got a maid but not sure if my MIL will come over to help. She didn't help with my son. Now I got twins better dun depend on her.
 
skies
your case very similar to mine. mil wanted us to move in with them during confinement, my mum too old to help. we were offered to use pil room and they will sleep in living room. i told hb NO. 1) how can we let them sleep in living room 2) 3 sil also staying there (overcrowded) + no privacy since i plan to bf my boy 3) too many things to bring over.. bb stuff, our stuff. All these inconvenience vs her inconvenience of walking over (10min) to our place everyday and plus bringing some pots over, I won :p but I let hb talked to mil. actually, the main / most impt reason is i know i wont be comfortable staying at their place
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talking abt bathing, mil also never plan to let me bathe. so, i wiped myself everyday until i cannot tahan, i told my hb i want to bathe then she bought herbs for me that was abt day 10 liao :p my mother also said if can endure, endure for 10 days then bathe.

i was glad that hb was able to take 3 weeks off during my confinement, less conflict btw me and mil. why not CL, well, she insisted and was a little angry when we said we wanted to engage CL. so i gave in to hb and agreed that no CL. mil washed bb clothes and sometimes swept the floor. hb did the dish washing and mopping of floor, and run errands. only towards the last week, mil stayed over upon hb request. dunno why bb kept crying at night and then i cant really walk for like 1+ months, so she will help to coax bb. hb not good at coaxing bb at all :D

whatever ur decision is, it is better to sort all everything clearly with hb /mil. for me a lot of things were not sorted cos hb is that type who will avoid tricky issues until they come. i dun want to be seen picking on things, so i usually kept quiet unless i cant stand it which sure to happen! i do understand it is tough/tiring for her as she has to rush back to cook dinner for pil/sil and do housework everyday. sometimes i juz wonder cant sils be more independent and share some housework at their 30s
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btw, old folks who are strict will say confinement is 40days hor.. mine was abt 40days!
 
July, Bliss & Singapoh - ya lor will have the hospital smell ... will bought the baby laundry detergent for further use .... hehehhe
 
bee,

u are still lucky that your mil help you to wash baby clothes and sweep the floor during your confinement.
my mil insisted to do confinement for me, but she says she only cook, not helping me to look after baby at nite, not washing baby clothes and housework shld be all done by my hubby..what kind of confinement is this? i noe i shouldnt ask her to do housework since she is quite elderly, but then make no sense that me and hb have to stress out ourselves during that period. then i would rather call for confinement catering, then rather she help me. So i insisted to get a confinement lady after she has such requests ..because i want to rest more at nite, and my hb's job is very taxing, i also dont wan to tired him out.. in the end mil and us had a huge arguement over this thing.. but i didnt give in, left her to be angry over this.
 
sunflower - @ tymes it is gd to be firm rather than suffer latter... their anger is only for a while and will subside when they c their grandchildren
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Skies/Bee- Me too initally PIL want me to stay at their place, same as bee offer their room n they sleep in living room. I rejected n said just pass me the confinement food daily n I handle bb myself. In the end, last min when i discharged fr hospital mil came n stayed with us. Last min decision, n she does allow me to bathe just use hot towel to wipe, after 5th day I nearly die, cried in front of hubby n he managed to convince my mil to let me bathe herbal bath.
 
stb,
u have maid rite... ask the maid to handwash baby clothes... clothes can use baby detergent to wash... as for items like stroller can use dettol diluted with water to wipe... that's wat i do for my 2nd hand cot... use the dettol sparingly... i just add a few drops to a pail of water... then have to leave it to stand for a while so that the smell will go off... even now i ask my maid to wipe the cot once a while with it... also since have a dog at home i also ask the maid to mop the floor with dettol once a wk too... again just a few drops added to water..

bliss,
i like the komodo baby detergent becos of the baby smell too! kekekee
 
bliss,
handwash clothes do indeed save water... when my maid first came... nothiing much for her to do.. so she handwash all the clothes n use the washing machine to spin dry... when only my hubby and i, we only have a part time maid that comes in once a wk to do housework and we hardly cook... but with the maid she do housework everyday n cook more frequently... so we were expecting the water n electricity bill to shoot up... surprisingly, it didn't increase much... the water bill only increase slightly... so handwash really saves water....
 
i only managed to bathe after the 5th day... my mum didn't get the herbs yet... maybe that's her strategy? kekeke... for 5 days i only wipe with hot towel and wash the pte area... by the 5th day i told her if she dun get the herbs i will use hot water to bathe... kekeke
 
Sunflower,

sometimes I really dun understand elderly. Wanna help but not all the way.

Let her know that she can assist CL if she likes or spend quality time with yr bb.

I think they dunno that they are adding stress to us. Already gone true so much to get preggy and now got to entertain them. Sigh... Really marry dh and his whole family :p
 
Hi, thanks for sharing...I've more or less decided to handwash bb's clothes for the 1st 6 mths...it's more of the 1st wash to prep for the newborn that I was more concerned with coz there are too many to handwash and dry.....
 
Eskimo,

I didn't bathe on the day I discharged from KKH. wait till my CL arrive next day then I bathe. I plan to cut my hair really short like last time.
 
stb,
do batch by batch... can start doing some now... select those clothes or items that u will use first then slowly as u go along can wash more...
 
singapoh,

ya i also dont understand wat they want..like to be bossy when it comes to us having their grandchild, everything must listen to them, but no real intention of helping out.. u noe my mil say i kept taking heaty stuff , but never take cooling stuff, baby will be very heaty next time..so she ask me to take more water chestnut and barley drinks.. then my hb ask her to cook for me...but my mil ask me to go buy myself!! ZZZzzzzz
 
singaporh
5-8 mins in total is fast! i scare my boy din drink the hind milk so i make sure he sucks 5 mins each, helps to prevent block ducts too
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twinstar
you boy is satisfied after one side... well, it's better this way than changing sides then, at least he still gets hind milk. i also din burp my boy if he falls asleep after a feed.. unless he wakes up and cries, then i burp him. after that hs usually goes back to sleep again!
 
sunflower,
i told hb to get part-time cleaner, he din want, so he has to do more lor. i rather dun sweep, cos dust/hair will fly everywhere, told her to use magic clean instead. old folks are old folks lor... next time, i will get CL, mil just need to cook
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Esk, I did think of batch by batch..but coz when I realised that we had so much difficulties to have our handwashed clothes dried by the end of the day when my maid was doing the washing, I m jus a bit concerned that same thing might happen to the bb's clothes though the latter should be smaller piece and shldn't take so long to dry...don't wan to take the risk of wasting the maid efforts to wash and then hang overnight...then got to re-wash again...may as well jus machine wash all at 1 go for now..then the older clothes re-wash again when he's ready to wear them...hehehe....waste of water..
 
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