IVF Mummies-To-Be Support Group

Yumyum,

Dun let Yr monster in law stress u la. U are the mother of the babies, u hv every right to decide their names. Once registered she can't can do anything. But yr dh will be sandwiched in between. He will be very stressful too. Sit down and discuss with him. Let him speak to his mum.
 


Yumyum, what I was advised is that tell your mil nicely that she has chance to name her own children. So now should be your turn to name yours. But definitely your hubby MUST be on your side.
We also like that. We are Christian. No need to follow those dob timing n we wants to name according to what we want n hubby will be the one insists on it. But when it was my mum who suggested weird name then I was the one said no.
 
Vi4n,

most probably Yumyum's MIL didn't get a chance to name her own kids. Usually it's the paternal grandpa who name the grandsons.

Like my case la, late FIL named my son. Eventhough he is no longer around, MIL expect us to name our son with the name left by my late FIL.
 
Singapoh.. Hm... Then yumyum see what u can do best lo. Both of you tell your mil the name can be better or tell how it can be used to tease the child.

I selected the maid Liao. Will only get her around mid of May when I can take leave n maternity already.
 
yumyum, i feel outraged for you.. instead of dealing with your MIL directly, it's probably easier if your DH breaks it to her that you have both already thought of names.
 
Vi4n, I kinda of regretted interviewing my maid coz I felt less comfy with our choice coz of her language proficiency....I asked questions, why she want to come here, how long she intend to work here, her hubby and kids are aware of her coming and are they supportive, and whether she know wat will she need to help me with, etc etc.....

End of the day, hubby and I discussed and agreed it's really based on luck on wat type of maid we will get...thus, we decided to go ahead with her, and slowly guide her esp when we know that communication is likely going to be challenging...

Mine is a filippino..and I'm receiving her on 31st Mar after interviewing her on 10 Mar...everything is v fast for me coz she already has a passport.....
 
The expo fair is a bit disappointing, however, i got things from pureen for the baby and myself, the therometer for the baby and 2-3 sets of newborn clothes for our son..
 
Spiffy, not really. She told me she understands but speak little english. However I realise she doesn't understand some words I use. Agency said it's e slang that she doesn't understand.
 
Bee- ya next bb in plan but have too be 3 mths later cos I wanna bf my boy at least till 6 mths old
happy.gif

Hopefully like bliss no need to go through FET can strike naturally
happy.gif
 
Singapoh, soontobe, me even best I jus interviewed her n bahasa totally ha ha. But I like her answer n the way she responded on certain questions. Another girl even I spoke in bahasa she likes everything also yes. So after 5 questions I stopped already.
I told the maid I'm the only one speak bahasa in the household so she must pick up English as fast.
I wants the maid only by mid may when I can take leave lo. So will be around 17 may.
Hopefully we decided on the correct one la
 
Soon-to-be, if can't understand much english how to understand ur instructions? Indo maid at least the older folks still can speak Malay to her. But Filipino, unless u speak her language if not.....
 
Hi ladies, fair is crowded but not to e extent of elbow to elbow. It's e walking crowd outside that makes my head spin... Didn't buy any big items & can't get my playpen mattress.. Anyway, saw smth interesting - cloth diapers w inserts.. Quite costly (pkgs range from $169-500) but still cheaper than disposables.. I'm really tempted but now challenged by dh if I'm diligent enough to wash them... Though washing also required w e normal cotton diapers, they r much cheaper & I ordered 3 dozen... So can b lazy when it comes to washing... Hmmm...

Btw, anyone knows of requirement of infant care? If I must get disposable diapers?
 
Ha ha. I think taka fair more bellies, here more strollers...

When u go tmr, check out e bumwear booth on e right of entrance & let me know your views of e diapers? Thanks.
happy.gif
 
singapoh,
think 2 brands bb cot on sale @ expo. gotta chk mag if u wan the brands

re: aunty
mine came a few days ago. my gal is 10.5mths
 
Hi ladies, it is 6.20am and thank goodness there is the forum.

Singapoh, spot-on! She did not get to name her own child. So she wanted to name her grandchildren.
In my case, FIL dunno chinese and is back in heaven.so it is really me and her. Even if the son does the talking.

Vi4n, I wanted the kids to bear names to remind them to honour God cos they are God's gift to me but I am the only christian in the household .my dh is anti-christianity now cos he did his praying when his dad was sick and his dad died in the end.ie I am not sure if he will support my choice of names and get caught in the middle.

Spiffy, I cannot shadow box in this case cos hubby dunno chinese at all.but I guess I can tell her I have tot of these names and my meaning and wishing for each child. If she disagrees (openly or say ok but ignores me or bitches about me to all her relatives), then dh will be squashed.

We are planning for 2nd maid now cos I know my mil is just here to be waited on and play with grandchildren. It is my confinement and I have to plan to take care of her too. Dunno how but hope I dun crack.

Somemore letting out....
I still cannot get over the fact that my mum has to take a train and a bus and come all the way from town to my ulu place and buy groceries for me only to get snubbed by mil. Something like 'why are you here, you are not welcomed' face, followed with a pretentious 'thank you for taking care of my dil' vocalised.she can give me the face and I have taken it. Why do this to my mum? My mum is buying out of her own pocket and to relieve my dh of afterwork grocery shopping. Guess I should not be so angry but I still am and my mum is upset with my mil behaviour.

Perhaps the naming thing is just a prelude to the challenges coming.

Sigh...
 
Despondent,

I hv seem those Bumwear reusable diaper before. Not for me coz I m too lazy to wash. Ha... I think cloth diapers will dry faster.
 
Yumyum,

I think the best is to ignore yr MIL. Or u can treat her like how she treats yr mum. :p

When yr mum is here, tell her in front of yr MIL how greatful u r to her for buying groceries and helping out.

Ystdy my MIL said my belly is small again. I told her I m eating for 1, not eating for 4 like her. Kaka...

She said when her triplets were born, their weight were between 5 to 6 pounds each so u can't imagine how huge my MIL during pregnancy.
 
Since my high glucose reading that day, I hv been testing for the next 2 days. I think the culprit is Coke zero.

I had a full can of Coke zero on Day 1 and my reading was super high.

Day 2, 3/4 can, reading was still high but slightly lower than Day 1.

Day 3 no Coke zero, my reading was within the normal range.

So from now on, got to siam Coke zero
sad.gif
 
Singapoh, Hazel.....I'll manage somehow with the maid..already gotten my gf to translate the houserules and timetables...and she gave me her bro and nephew contacts in Singapore so jus in case I really need help. I think the maid's English is not that jialat as I think, cld be I have higher expectations..u know, the moment u think is filippino, English definitely not a prob...but to think of it, English isn't their 1st language....8P....hehee, n none in my family except hubby can speak Malay...so the filippino is still a better choice.

Yumyum, if ur MIL really like this, u need to communicate to ur hubby to let him sort it out first. Wld still suggest u take a backseat unless ur hubby is not doing anything to help u in this situation...then, u got to stand up for urself, ur mum and ur babies.....stay cool ok???

Singapoh, u better control ur intake lar.....2-3 more mths for u to go only....hang on there...
 
Thanks twinstars and hazel. I will think about it. Still not sure if i should get the higher end one cos I am probably just having 1 kid. My Sil left me a medela mini electric but I have to get new parts cos they are rather old.

Singapoh, I love coke alot too but I only been taking a few sips each time since I am preggy. Coke zero should be zero glucose rite? Maybe the artifical sugar is the culprit. Maybe you try taking a few sips just to fulfil the craving.

Yumyum, dun be upset by your mil behavior. How about suggesting that each of you name a child each since you are having triplets? This will be fair to all parties.
 
Soon to be,

Good luck to u. Hee... Men won't bother abt maid one. Like my dh hor. He can speak Mandarin to our maid but still wants me to tell her something when she's nearby. Sigh...

Bakaholic,

I can do without Coke zero for now. Can just take plain soda. Maybe squeeze some lemon juice to taste like Perrier.
happy.gif
 
Singapoh, don't worry...u know I like to see things fr a more positive angle...will learn to manage along the way..will definitely find a way to communicate w her..8)...anyway it isn't that bad, even MIL knows a bit of simple English.....
 
Oh Singapoh, I was even telling my hubby if the maid isn't too bad, perhaps we shld sign up an English short-term course for her...wahahah..my hubby said I siow!
 
yumyum, your MIL probably doesn't understand why your mother is there. you can help put a positive spin by letting your mil know that dh doesn't have time to do groceries so yr mum's helping out etc etc.
i still feel very strongly about naming your own children. it was a very fun exercise for us to choose names.

what's this abt our dh knowing malay? mine also understands and speaks it.. haha

soon-to-be, i noticed that the medela special offers seem to be the same from various stores.

did you guys read today's sunday times about nearly 30% of new maids get sent back?
 
Singapoh, tat's werid. My dh takes coke zero Very often but no elevated sugar level thereafter.

Yumyum, understand how u feel. But bbs r ours n we r their mothers. We do wat we deem is best okay? I had a big fight with my dh yesterday night too. His family is catholic n was taking abt bb batipism. I am okay with it but without discussing with me he told the sister tt she will be My bb's god mother. I asked him if can batipised bb but dun wan a god mum. He said cannot. Then I said I dun wan his sister to be my bb's god mum n he got mad n started yelling at me. N started to shout n fight with me on other stuff.

We had dinner together with his birthday. The venue was near our plc, 5mins drive away but we went to northeast to pick up my mil n maid. His sister stays in the west. She told my dh she is tired n wanted him to send mil back home after dinner. Dh dare not even say his wife is equally tired also! She said she had to wake up early at 9am this morning.. Isn't tt the time we all hv to wake up?!

Anyway, I told dh already. Bb is mine I will do wat I deem fit. If cannot find a suitable god parent turn will delay batispism. Though I wld want to batispise my bb.
 
Hazel this godmum thing should be discussed and agreed by both of you first but any reason why you dont want your SIL to be the godmum?
 
Spiffy, no lar, we were jus discussing about indo maid...so i was saying even if i get indo maid, no one except my hubby in my family will be able to communicate w her.....

I need to get the medela accessories, so now thinking whether to go the mumsandbabes warehouse sales or jus get from taka fair...u did a comparison on all the promos liao? Everywhere the same har? If yes, then I jus get it from taka next weekend...don't need to purposely rush to the west today....
 
Hazel, discuss nicely with ur hubby. There might be a reason y ur hubby prefer to ask his sis...is that the SIL without kids one? If yes, maybe he jus wan her to have a "half" kid.......if u really dont wan, then let him know nicely too, ok? Sometimes some people tend to speak the wrong things in a fit of anger...

Wei, to share with all....Hubby and I believe in Fengshui, so based on Chen Junrong 2010 fengshui book, he claimed that for tiger babies, esp girls, good to have godmum/dad/parents...So without my SIL knowing, my MIL, hubby n I decided to appoint her as our son's godmum...hehehe...but I put a clause on that, must see whether they match..so I will ask Chen Junrong to cal for me since he has my entire family's information and we will be engaging him to provide suggestions for our son's name...
 
soon-to-be, yes, specifically i saw the same promo for the medela swing in 3 shops at $389 with the same freebies thrown in. which one you getting?
 
Spiffy, my sis's fren passed me the pump in style advanced...she suggested that I changed the accessories coz of hygiene reason...hubby and I have discussed whether necessary, or jus sterilize the pump...coz really don't know whether i will have breast milk or not or wat if I find it too tiring or lazy to pump when I go back to work, then a bit waste of money to buy the pump...but I wan to get some storage bottles or milk bags...
 
soon-to-be, ah i see..well you're already saving lots not buying the pump....are the new accessories expensive? if no, think you should just get new ones.
 
Yumyum,
maybe can compromise? Christian names u choose n Chinese names ur mil choose? I think ur dh has to make a stand on this even if it's not going to easy.

Soontobe,
my filipino maid English is not bad but sometimes she will have difficulty understanding me so i have to repeat a few times. It's the slang I think. Worse come to worse write it for her to read. I think her English quite good cos she can read the papers but it's our accent that she has to get use to.
 


Spiffy,
using cloth diapers is good n definitely cost saving. But getting more doesn't mean can delay washing cos the longer u leave it, u won't be able to get the stains esp poo stains off. Would suggest u use disposable diaper for the 1st week at least first as the poo stains will not be able to wash off easily until the poo turns yellowish then ok the use cloth ones. Also it'll be quite chaotic when bbs first get home so dun stress urself over washing of cloth diapers.
 
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