Disobeying the confinement rules

[karen wang]

Hi moms,

I had followed the confinement rules for 2 weeks. But my tolerance for the rules cannot hold that long anymore. Singapore is way too HOT! and I even drank sips of water even I had the longan red date tea & Milo.

I even went to shower w/o herbs one day because my hair is so oily and even flakes are appearing.I am exclusively breastfeeding too. I just want to keep myself clean and hydrated. But my MIL always tell me that if i don't follow the confinement rules, I will suffer in the future. She only allowed me to shower with warm herbs water once every 2 days.

Is it true? Cause there is no scientific proof to all this.

 

[darran huang]

Hi Karen,

Allow me to share some information pertaining to your doubts.

Yes, you should listen to your MIL as much as possible. The reason for them to behave like this is that, either they might have experience it themselves or they heard from people who might have suffer due to non-compliance of the restrictions.

For example,
you will have shaky hands if you were to shower without herbs during this period. (Do you feel this after your shower?). It is good to keep drinking red dates tea or Milo. Strictly no plain water because of the 'wind'.
During this period, it is important that you keep staying in the sleeping position as much as possible. The reason behind is that, if you don't, your core (hips area, front & back) will suffer lot of soreness easily and painfully in the future. Our core plays a big part if our daily activities motions.

I hope this will clarifies abit of your doubts. This are the few symptoms that my spouse sounded to me.

Cheers
January 2014 new daddy.

 

[sunny72]

The confinement rules (at least for Chinese Singaporeans) came from China where the weather is much cooler most of the time. So it made sense for them not to bathe cos of the higher chill factor etc. Follow the rules but with moderation. e.g. bath or mop yourself daily if you wish, but with hot/warm water, quickly, and if you do so, may as well do it with herbs right. Make sure that the room is free of breezes.

Similarly, drinking plain room temperature water is fine I should think.
In our weather, and especially for breastfeeding mums, it is best and in fact very necessary to stay hydrated. And really it depends on your body type. If your body is very cool (pre pregnancy), then it may be all right for you to take nothing but heaty drinks during confinement. But if your body is already the "hot" type (pre pregnancy) , drinking nothing but heating drinks may actually have an adverse effect on you.... and then on your baby.

There are no strict black and white lines. Be mindful and listen to your body. For breastfeeding mums, look also at your baby's output. Cos whatever you take in, impacts on them as well.

As for "sleeping position", rest is obviously necessary however, some very mild exercise should be done as well. Most hospitals will have post-natal classes (post birth) where they teach simple exercises to new mothers how to improve your core, and also strenghten your pelvic muscles. Note: if you had a caesearian or any complications during birth, check with your gynae when you can start exercising.

Actually, since we live in Singapore, if we were to follow any rules, we should follow the Malays or Indonesians. Have you seen Indonesian ladies post birth? They look great (both outwardly and health wise).
Sorry, I have always been meaning to research their confinement rules but have been too lazy. Maybe I should do it for this, my 3rd pregnancy and upcoming 3rd confinement.

 

[auntyofenqi]

Hi Karen,

I am considered a naughty mummy who defy every confinement rules. I shower daily, wash hair every other day, wear sleeveless tee & shorts at home, wash milk bottles, take care of my baby, go out during confinement & do not take traditional confinement food. Up till now, I have (yet) to suffer the consequences (my first born is 5yrs old now). I have no problem with breastfeeding my children and recover quite fast for normal delivery. I am quite healthy and rarely falls sick though. =P

Only thing I learn from my first child experience is not to bend over to change diaper, causes backache. So for my 2nd one, I sit on the bed to change diaper. Try to be sensitive to your MIL who wants the best for your health, maybe shower before she visits you? haha Close the bedroom door, who knows what you are doing huh? haha

The most important thing is to enjoy your baby during confinement! Have fun!

 

[sunny72]

http://www.euyansang.com.sg/beware-these-6-confinement-myths/eysfertility1.html

I'm not as "brave" as auntyofenqi.

But if you want some "expert" opinion - see attached link from Eu Yan Sang.

 

[agaga]

@auntyofenqi

I so envy you that you had a good health. My body can't take it, my #1 although I tried to follow the rules by drinking the longan water, heaty confinement food, no bathe for first few days. Can't tolerate anymore took herb bath, sleep in air con room (26/27 degree) Immediately, my back was aching, feet also, very painful, can't step on the floor.

2nd confinement, almost the same as 1st one. This round I try w/o herb cos I find them smelly. What I got is headache and the pain is like needle in my head after shower. I apply medicated plasters on my feet every night. Backache is always there since #1

This round, 3rd preg. I'm thinking to get lemongrass shower gel, hopefuly can get rid of the wind abit. Seriously I really wanted to obey all the way for my body sake but I guess I can't again cos it's way too hot.

 

[pareto]

I'm finishing my confinement soon. Just wanted to share my personal experience. This is my #3. I tried to follow the conventional rules for all 3. For my first one, I did 30 days of confinement. For my second, I wanted 60 days but kinda stopped after 6 weeks, cos the confinement food got too heaty for me. For my third confinement, I'm planning to stick to 40 days of confinement. I noticed differences between my 1st and 2nd confinement. I had shoulder and back aches after my 1st and decided to do a longer period of confinement for #2.

I try to rest, take herbal bath (everyday), wash my hair about once a week. I found using Neutrogena Anti-Residue Shampoo useful as my hair was not greasy even after 5 days. Take red date and longan drink (i'm planning to drink for 40 days). I'll ask my CL to prepare ginger drink from time to time. Long pants and t-shirt (not long sleeves though) everyday.

I just tell myself... I don't want to look back when I'm old and aching, regretting not listening to old wisdom when doing my confinement. Its just 40 days. Just bear with it and before you know it, its over. Jiayou, mommies!

 

[agaga]

@pareto

Hihi
You mentioned de Neutrogena shampoo is pretty good for keeping the scalp dry for days. Are you a regular Neutrogena user? Or rather is your hair type dry/normal/oily during pre-preg?

I'm trying to source for a 'good' shampoo which can also last me a few days without washing.

I'm those normal hair type, hair will get oily and itchy scalp if not wash for 2 days.

 

[parfum05]

I bathe on my 6th day of confinement using herbs packs. My hubby cooked my confinement food for 1st wk. He also prepared 养生 soup for me to clear the lochia in my body. We bought a confinement recipe book which I think it helped alot. After 1 wk my mil does my confinement. As she did not had proper confinement done previously hence she think confinement is no big deal. So after the 2nd wk I moved home cos my mom was concerned abt my health if not tsken care properly. So in my opinion I feel pressurised having my mil to do my confinement.

 

[jie_sisters]

Would suggest to follow old folks' saying, if you can. Just wouldn't want to regret not heeding her advice in future.

Anyway, the rules can be different from one family to another. For me, my mom is ok with me taking bath everyday with warm water, but I had to do it very quickly and made sure that I was totally dry afterwards. However, no hair shower till 30 days later. One thing for sure, I took lots and lots of ginger tea during the confinement period.

 

[pringles_09]

Hi, i followed the confinement rules in moderation. my confinement nanny is also open and said we cant be stuck in the old thinking. she allowed me to on the fan and the aircon. however, she only allows me to wipe myself with hot/warm water, and shower in warm water and dry my hair immediately. i wear sleeveless and shorts everyday at home with fan and aircon on if needed. just no direct blowing wind after shower. and if i touch water, she reminded me again and again, dry your hands esp between the fingers.

i drank warm water cos i developed sore throat from all the food, and only after i recover i took the red date tea again.

to me, sanity is more important than anything else. i experienced a hubby who came into the gynae clinic purchasing cream for his wife, because she followed the confinement rules blindly and had heat rash ALL Over her body.

handling a newborn is already not easy, i dont believe in making life even more difficult for yourself during this period of time!