IronMaiden80
Member
Hi Mummies,
I am a full-time working mother with 2 toddler boys. During the day, my #1 attends school while my #2 who is turning 2 stays at my mil’s place with my helper and mil. My helper has been with me for almost a year now, I can’t help but to have doubts about her. From day 1, I stressed the importance of being fair to both my boys, she should never choose one over the other. I had a previous helper who did that and I didn't want history to repeat itself. She doesn’t meet my standards when it comes to cleanliness and to be honest, I am washing her bathroom because she simply can’t keep it clean. I can still close an eye to these but I really cannot tolerate her behavior with my children. She clearly favors my #2 over my eldest. I try to understand that she spends most of the time with him thus she dotes on him more but it is to the point where she doesn’t allow me to be with him. When we head out, she will want to hold on to him and always grabs to feed him or be with him. I know he is also attached to her but sometimes when he wants me to carry, she doesn’t allow him to come to me, she will hold him back or walk away. During our recent trip overseas, I can count the number of pictures I took with my #2 cos she keeps hogging on to him. She knows I’m upset, I don’t hide it but she doesn’t know how to encourage my boy to come to me or let me be near him. She can blatantly kiss my boy in front of me and then simply looked at me like she’s waiting to see my reaction. She doesn’t really bother much with my #1, she just does her job with him without emotions. I know I should tell her when I feel something is not right, I’m soft, I really don’t know how to tell her off because it is so awkward but I’m screaming inside and it is stressing me out. I wouldn’t want to hire a helper if I can stay at home and take care of them but I have no choice. I’m really upset with my helper right now... I really want to release her and handle the 2 kids on my own with the help of my mil during the day. Any Mummies facing the same issue?
I am a full-time working mother with 2 toddler boys. During the day, my #1 attends school while my #2 who is turning 2 stays at my mil’s place with my helper and mil. My helper has been with me for almost a year now, I can’t help but to have doubts about her. From day 1, I stressed the importance of being fair to both my boys, she should never choose one over the other. I had a previous helper who did that and I didn't want history to repeat itself. She doesn’t meet my standards when it comes to cleanliness and to be honest, I am washing her bathroom because she simply can’t keep it clean. I can still close an eye to these but I really cannot tolerate her behavior with my children. She clearly favors my #2 over my eldest. I try to understand that she spends most of the time with him thus she dotes on him more but it is to the point where she doesn’t allow me to be with him. When we head out, she will want to hold on to him and always grabs to feed him or be with him. I know he is also attached to her but sometimes when he wants me to carry, she doesn’t allow him to come to me, she will hold him back or walk away. During our recent trip overseas, I can count the number of pictures I took with my #2 cos she keeps hogging on to him. She knows I’m upset, I don’t hide it but she doesn’t know how to encourage my boy to come to me or let me be near him. She can blatantly kiss my boy in front of me and then simply looked at me like she’s waiting to see my reaction. She doesn’t really bother much with my #1, she just does her job with him without emotions. I know I should tell her when I feel something is not right, I’m soft, I really don’t know how to tell her off because it is so awkward but I’m screaming inside and it is stressing me out. I wouldn’t want to hire a helper if I can stay at home and take care of them but I have no choice. I’m really upset with my helper right now... I really want to release her and handle the 2 kids on my own with the help of my mil during the day. Any Mummies facing the same issue?