Childless Not By Choice Group
- Thread starter babygalore09
- Start date
Rostrum, i think maybe i got a chance for jabs next med FET... haha... cos i will not have over stimulation then. If i not wrong, nuh practices jabs for ladies not prone to over stim...
Think kkivf got very good success rates, you r in good hands... looking forward to your good news
when you decide to do ivf?
Think kkivf got very good success rates, you r in good hands... looking forward to your good news
when you decide to do ivf?
Tigi, so sorry to post wrongly there as I only wants to be a silent reader there.
Try asking for jabs and inserts. Mabbbe I am too concerned for the 2ww support.
every clinic got the same success rate. I dun wan to pin too high hopes. Jus do whatever I can now. When is your FET?
Try asking for jabs and inserts. Mabbbe I am too concerned for the 2ww support.
every clinic got the same success rate. I dun wan to pin too high hopes. Jus do whatever I can now. When is your FET?
Tigi, I hv been going to Dr Zou twice a week. No choice since I am starting my cycle in a few months time. I also try to jog twice a week
At work, now I try to take it easy as I keep telling myself this is not my company, no pt getting so stressed up. Having babies is more important.
At work, now I try to take it easy as I keep telling myself this is not my company, no pt getting so stressed up. Having babies is more important.
nx time when i go jogging, i will remember somewhere in singapore, there is another gal working as hard as me to realise our dreams of holding our bb in our arms... hee hee
i am working in a male dominated line... sometimes i stress myself to prove my worth, so bad for me right?
i am working in a male dominated line... sometimes i stress myself to prove my worth, so bad for me right?
Tigi, you know what? Everytime I see girls jogging and ard the same age as me, I will start to think whether they are trying for bb/ivf as well? And this keeps me going and going. Now I am quite addicted to jogging liao. Haha...
Yr ultimate dream is still to be a mum. who knows u might quit yr job for your baby? No point proving your worth at work. Stay relaxed is the most important thing to do now.
Yr ultimate dream is still to be a mum. who knows u might quit yr job for your baby? No point proving your worth at work. Stay relaxed is the most important thing to do now.
rostrum, same here, i am getting addicted to jogging now... I found it to be very good stress reliever ! & now you can confirm that what u speculate is true, at least for one person and that is me!
Deep down inside, i am wondering whether one day i will quit job for bb... the thought sounds very scary in the beginning actually haha.... but life does happen in the way least expected. Maybe i am not destinated to be a career woman.
Deep down inside, i am wondering whether one day i will quit job for bb... the thought sounds very scary in the beginning actually haha.... but life does happen in the way least expected. Maybe i am not destinated to be a career woman.
Hi girls! long time didn't see you around in this thread.
Lyn - Hope both your parents are fine now. I am sure this is a stressful period for you. Take care.
Tigi - All the best to your coming FET.
Am sure your 4 darlings can't wait to transfer to your warm womb and continue to grow there.
Rostrum - Good to hear you are keeping yourself healthy with jogging and tcm. We will hear good news from you very soon.
Babygalore - Enjoying the shopping?
I went Taka Fair 1 week ago and bought the piegeon steriliser set only, will buy the rest later. I tend to feel tired after shopping like 1 hr or so. ha ha ha wonder when is the energy returning? Everyday after work, i would come home immediately after dinner coz too tired to think of shopping.
Let me know when is the gathering but if next year....guess will be after my confinement as i am popping in early Jan.
Lyn - Hope both your parents are fine now. I am sure this is a stressful period for you. Take care.
Tigi - All the best to your coming FET.
Rostrum - Good to hear you are keeping yourself healthy with jogging and tcm. We will hear good news from you very soon.
Babygalore - Enjoying the shopping?
Let me know when is the gathering but if next year....guess will be after my confinement as i am popping in early Jan.
ellesie
Active Member
*wave wave*
i'm still here. one more month to go to my edd. but till now i haven't even prepared the baby room yet cos no energy to do it and keep procratinating.
Lyn, hope ur parents are ok by now. Take good care of urself also ok? Try to not think too much on the conceiving.I would say rather focus on having a strong marriage. Honestly after such a long journey and finally conceived, but my relationship has suffered and to the point there is possibility for me to be a single parent. It's very painful but I accepted it whole heartedly.So I hope this won't happen to other couples who are ttc-ing.
Babygalore, tat's a good idea for the outing. If next yr I think should be fine cos for this yr, I have to fully take care of my bb singlehandedly.How're u doing now? honestly I am in a very low morale condition but i try to cheer myself up, not to affect the bb. Hope to see the happy bb next month
Gan,do the shopping slowly. try to rest in between ok? but second trimester should be the peak of ur energy level.Tat's when i do my shopping. hahaha. Once hit 3rd tri, i dun even have the energy to clean and set up my bb room. lazy me.
Rostrum, all the best to ur fresh cycle. We have lots and lots of bb dust for u here. remember to bathe with it, ok?
Tigi, all the best for ur FET. graduation day is coming
For those are still trying, please keep a positive mind and dun give up. But at the same time, dun let this journey strained ur relationship as we still need to hold our partner's hand to walk with us to the end of our life.
i'm still here. one more month to go to my edd. but till now i haven't even prepared the baby room yet cos no energy to do it and keep procratinating.
Lyn, hope ur parents are ok by now. Take good care of urself also ok? Try to not think too much on the conceiving.I would say rather focus on having a strong marriage. Honestly after such a long journey and finally conceived, but my relationship has suffered and to the point there is possibility for me to be a single parent. It's very painful but I accepted it whole heartedly.So I hope this won't happen to other couples who are ttc-ing.
Babygalore, tat's a good idea for the outing. If next yr I think should be fine cos for this yr, I have to fully take care of my bb singlehandedly.How're u doing now? honestly I am in a very low morale condition but i try to cheer myself up, not to affect the bb. Hope to see the happy bb next month
Gan,do the shopping slowly. try to rest in between ok? but second trimester should be the peak of ur energy level.Tat's when i do my shopping. hahaha. Once hit 3rd tri, i dun even have the energy to clean and set up my bb room. lazy me.
Rostrum, all the best to ur fresh cycle. We have lots and lots of bb dust for u here. remember to bathe with it, ok?
Tigi, all the best for ur FET. graduation day is coming
For those are still trying, please keep a positive mind and dun give up. But at the same time, dun let this journey strained ur relationship as we still need to hold our partner's hand to walk with us to the end of our life.
miraclebabyhopes
New Member
Hello everyone. To all the mummies-to-be (babygalore, gan and elle), must be so exciting. I would have gone out-of control at the taka baby fair...Take care of yourselves and your princesses.
Unfortunately, there was no made in Japan for me. Now hopping at least for a made in Glen E. I am planning to do a fresh cycle next month, starting around hari raya period. Was planning to actually start today, but dr f not happy with my antral follicle count which dropped from the usual 10 plus, although fsh was good. Anyway, will take this month to bu. And yes, tigi and rostrum, there is one other gal in Singapore also jogging/brisk walking in Singapore once a week. Let's jia-you together! By the way, I also don't like to post on the other ivf thread. This thread is much more personalised...
Lyn, how are you? It's already 3 months plus since we cycled together. what's your next step? you started on DHEA?
Unfortunately, there was no made in Japan for me. Now hopping at least for a made in Glen E. I am planning to do a fresh cycle next month, starting around hari raya period. Was planning to actually start today, but dr f not happy with my antral follicle count which dropped from the usual 10 plus, although fsh was good. Anyway, will take this month to bu. And yes, tigi and rostrum, there is one other gal in Singapore also jogging/brisk walking in Singapore once a week. Let's jia-you together! By the way, I also don't like to post on the other ivf thread. This thread is much more personalised...
Lyn, how are you? It's already 3 months plus since we cycled together. what's your next step? you started on DHEA?
Hi miraclebaby, ya i have started with dhea for the second day. 3 mth ago till now i had been bumping around and settlings things for my parents and life been very busy. I m not ready for the rollercoaster ride yet... honestly speaking i m inspired by ur strong determination.
Elle, rostrum, tigi and other ladies thks for ur concern.. i feel so warmth from the care u ladies had shown me... tks lot
Elle, i hope everything is well with ur marriage.. dun do anything harmful to urself or ur marriage pls take time to calm urself down otherwise u may regret in future. Yes i agreeded that ppl like us who faced difficulty in conceiving face a great challenge in marriage life too and yes me and hubby also quarrelled many times abt this but everytime we had a fight abt baby issue at the end of the day we both ultimately felt that having each other is more important then having a dozen of babies. So elle i m not sure wat problems u and ur hubby is facing with ur marriage but i want to tell u u married ur hubby becoz of love so every problem can be solved. At the meantime pls still strong for urself and ur bb. Pls share with us if u need a listening ear.. take care
Elle,gan and babyg, hope we can have a gathering after u ladies delivered. Pls spread ur babydust hor...
Elle, rostrum, tigi and other ladies thks for ur concern.. i feel so warmth from the care u ladies had shown me... tks lot
Elle, i hope everything is well with ur marriage.. dun do anything harmful to urself or ur marriage pls take time to calm urself down otherwise u may regret in future. Yes i agreeded that ppl like us who faced difficulty in conceiving face a great challenge in marriage life too and yes me and hubby also quarrelled many times abt this but everytime we had a fight abt baby issue at the end of the day we both ultimately felt that having each other is more important then having a dozen of babies. So elle i m not sure wat problems u and ur hubby is facing with ur marriage but i want to tell u u married ur hubby becoz of love so every problem can be solved. At the meantime pls still strong for urself and ur bb. Pls share with us if u need a listening ear.. take care
Elle,gan and babyg, hope we can have a gathering after u ladies delivered. Pls spread ur babydust hor...
ellesie
Active Member
Hi,Lyn
Thank you for your concern. Dun worry I won't do anything harmful to myself nor bb but honestly I am really worried about getting pre and post natal depression. Lots of things happened along the way and I think both of us have forgotten how to communicate or can say lose ourselves.His feeling has changed and things are not the same anymore.I prepared myself for the worst and though the pregnancy itself is smooth but I dun have the care and concern that I need. Anyway, the sisters here have given the morale support and i have my bb with me. So I feel blessed
Dun worry about the baby dust, can shower u anytime u need.
Thank you for your concern. Dun worry I won't do anything harmful to myself nor bb but honestly I am really worried about getting pre and post natal depression. Lots of things happened along the way and I think both of us have forgotten how to communicate or can say lose ourselves.His feeling has changed and things are not the same anymore.I prepared myself for the worst and though the pregnancy itself is smooth but I dun have the care and concern that I need. Anyway, the sisters here have given the morale support and i have my bb with me. So I feel blessed
Dun worry about the baby dust, can shower u anytime u need.
Dear Elle,
You are one brave Mum. Have a smooth delivery and be blessed with your beautiful princess.
Dear Babygalore,
Glad that all well with you. Thanks for thinking of us....definitely would like to attend gathering.
Dear Lyn,
Glad that we had a good chat the other time. Let me know if you need more DHEA.
Some update on my side, I did not manage to go ahead with my natural cycle this month as I had ovulated prematurely....in any case, we tried on our own so keeping our fingers crossed now. Can I grab some baby dust from Babygalore, Elle and Gan........?
You are one brave Mum. Have a smooth delivery and be blessed with your beautiful princess.
Dear Babygalore,
Glad that all well with you. Thanks for thinking of us....definitely would like to attend gathering.
Dear Lyn,
Glad that we had a good chat the other time. Let me know if you need more DHEA.
Some update on my side, I did not manage to go ahead with my natural cycle this month as I had ovulated prematurely....in any case, we tried on our own so keeping our fingers crossed now. Can I grab some baby dust from Babygalore, Elle and Gan........?
ellesie
Active Member
Jude,
Get Set, Ready, Go.....
Here I come with my zillion tonnes of baby dust.
Hahaha....
dun despair ok? It can always be a sign that you will conceive naturally instead of thru ivf? Tat wat happened in my case. my 2nd fresh cycle was terminated due to oversupression and who knows while i'm waiting for my 3rd fresh, i have conceived and i thot it's my haywire period after failed attempt.
I have no choice but to be brave, cos now I am no longer alone but there's a life in me.I know it won't be easy for me onwards but I promised my gal to give her the best
I'm glad when I'm down at least I got sisters here to rant and vent
Thanks for the concern
Get Set, Ready, Go.....
Here I come with my zillion tonnes of baby dust.
Hahaha....
dun despair ok? It can always be a sign that you will conceive naturally instead of thru ivf? Tat wat happened in my case. my 2nd fresh cycle was terminated due to oversupression and who knows while i'm waiting for my 3rd fresh, i have conceived and i thot it's my haywire period after failed attempt.
I have no choice but to be brave, cos now I am no longer alone but there's a life in me.I know it won't be easy for me onwards but I promised my gal to give her the best
I'm glad when I'm down at least I got sisters here to rant and vent
Thanks for the concern
babygalore09
Member
Lyn,
Pat pat, its really not easy to have both parents needing medical care at the same time, a few years, ago, my mum underwent a major surgery and it made me at least one year older due to the worries and taking care of and I cannot imagine what is its like for two parents to be hospitalise at the time. Are they better liao? Discharged? Please pace yourself, caught time in between to have cat naps and they be be back in the pink of health soon!
Nevermind if pregnancy has not happened, as long as you are focused on other aspects of life (improving yourself, work, family), its good enough. And I won't let you be my child's godmother although of course I want as many people to love my child as possible
You know why? Because I want you and hope one right day, you will have your very own and our children can then become good friends. I read fengshui before that in one's life, god children are also considered as in a way, own's children in the wheel of fengshui, so I won't let my child take the place of what your child will eventually take and I am sure it will happen at the right time
I will surely bug on on your handfone if got outing..and in these months of accumlation, I sure got lots of dusts reserved for you
Tigi,
Hehee…yes, this thread will make barbie dolls manufacturer very happy as a lot of potential demand here but will not make MILs very happy as they all seem to like babies with kuku birds ;p
Tigi, you are just taking a break before you reach the finishing line with style
Indeed, your four embies are waiting for your womb reception
Four is quite a number in my eyes. Means you responded quite well from the fact that you even developed ohss. That time my ovaries dry dry one, on signs of ohss not to mention got embies in-waitiing. Hope your FET will bring surprise. Babydusts ok…
Hey sister, I also in a male dominated line and one thing I realised is that no matter how hard we work, the bosses up there will always know that there is this chance that we might have kids, go on maternity and then take it easier. When I joined this co years ago, my col told me that my boss actually asked her if I wanted to have a baby and my col told him she did not know. This means that no matter how hard we work, there will always be some sort of discount already attached as we are women even if we did not publicly announce we want babies. Means bottomline line is, we must take care of our health first than career.
Rostrum,
Yes, maybe the time I send out the invites, we must let you decide where to eat as you will be suffering from morning sickness. Hope you suffer from morning sickness soon..heheee..
Yeah, I will defnitely update here....Rostrum and Tigi, its perfectly fine to be silent readers, just write whenever you feel like it k. And Rostrum is right, each one of us will our own timing at the best time. Let me share a piece of news from my family. My hubby's cousin just discovered she is pregnant after 8 years of marriage and I believe they wanted kids like one year into the marriage. The mummy is 39 years old and the daddy is about 45. She has reached the stage of not expecting anything and also started to do volunteer work and totally caught unware by the pregnancy. We are all surprised and cannot marvel at how unpredictable life is. Of course I am really really hope our sisters on this thread can strike soon in the future. Just that this new pregnancy in the family reinforces that there is always hope somewhere in time.
Gan,
Yes, I finished shopping liao leh
Elle's warning is right, I had initially want to wait but realised that as baby's weight increases, the pelvic muscles are aching after more than 30 mins of walking. So its buy things first while still can walk around continuously for 30mins. Yes, you are very smart to have bought the steriliser there because that is the best bundle I have seen so far. I stupid, when to went at BHG earlier, not so many items bundled together. Some carseats are the fair are heavily discounted too, check them out if u need one but check the manufactured date as carseats have a lifespan of 5 yrs fr the make date. K, sure will remind you when organise outing next year…
Hallow Elle,
Yes, I totally share your anticipation that it’s a new person in our life, with it will bring joy and also fear if can be a good mother. Like u, there are thoughts that crossed my mind if I can handle the baby's demands and cries with the right response. So in anticipation of this anticipation, I told myself that whenever the baby cries, I will look at her face and tell myself that is is a gift from the upper forces and the cries are actually a form of music that we have waited so hard and long to hear. Also, lets keep reminding ourselves that despite the fact that society's expectation for mum's are so high nowadays (I attended Mrs Wong's baby bathing class and she made it sound like a crime if the baby cries during bathing time and the mum cannot do anything to calm down the crying. She said a baby must enjoy a bath like doing spa. Yeah right. I was like thinking, please, my nephew used to cry everytime when sis bathes him and he is now a cheerful 9 year old running around messing my room), as long as our babies are well-fed, healthy (if sick, healthcare is easily accessible in modern day Singapore), clean, safe, we must try not to stress ourselves. I also try to comfort myself that last time, our parents bring so many of us up, without maids, we all turn out well. As long as we don't put so much expectations on ourselves, things will work itself out. K, lets do it together. I am sure we can. For the baby room, just need to do 3 things, just make a clean space in the cardboard (after cleaning, buy a $2 hippo dehumdifer to put there to prevent mold), and second is cleaning the cot with clean wet tissue and wash the bed sheet. Third thing is for baby's stuff that must be ready for every diaper change/miscellaneous activities, I bought a very cheap four tier plastic rank from Carrefour/(NTUC carries them too) and intend to put all the handy things like diaper cream, diapers there for easy accessibility. With these three "actions", the nursery room should be ready the babies plus u and me
Other things to give ambience like nice lace for the wall, if got time then slowly add on as they are not crucial for survival.
For me now, like you, there are question marks and anticipiation and I try to simplify things and manage expectation on myself to manage the anticipition, I am not a christain, but I like to think of this phrase that my christain friends always say "god will only give us what we can handle", "will cross the bridge when reach it" and of couse the fact that this precious gift beats all fears to calm myself down when not sure if can be good parent. So if I can, you sure can, Elle, remember, you braved through 8 years for this gift and if you have gone through those tests, what else can defeat you? Think in the department of steadiness, you are the champion
That is mentally. Physically, I am a piece of rag, can only work, come back and sleep. Weekend try to get ready for new family member but tired after a while. So take one thing at a time and if tired, just sleep and think later.
Sister, whenever you feel overwhelmed, must come here to vent or we will be angry with you for not being "sister" enough k. In your relationship department, its unfair for me to conclude for you if it can be saved. However, can I share with you what I experienced. Again, not sure if its relevant but just share share no harm. I married my hubby after about 4 years of dating and during the time we married, quite a bit of unhappiness happened involving my MIL wanting to live with us, she feeling that I snatched her son and we were so caught up in that and the preparations that we also forgot to communicate and be nice to each other. Also, although four years is not a long time, its long time to start making us take each other for granted. The initiate stage of TLC disappeared over the years without us realising. When we came to realised it, we had several talking sessions to discuss what had happened and came up with a seemingly childish arrangement. That is to pretend that we just knew each other and started dating again. It had involved deliberate acts like planning for short trips and movie sessions but the feeling was rekindled. So now I know that feelings can be rekindled but someone has to make the first move and of course the other person has to reciprocate or both has to work together. This is an ongoing lifelong rekindling exercise that has to be worked on daily. If you think that this man in your life is still worth the effort, make the first move, and it can take a few months to make a diff. Invite your hubby to listen to two of you's baby heartbeat everyday on your tum tum (ask him to press his ears there, tell him you still love him, be needy, don't be manly, show him you need him as a woman and he as a strong man) Perhaps you have done so I am not sure. However, if you think that your feelings have changed too and it might not be worth it, I support your every decision and I am sure there is another person out there when you are ready, to give you that TLC. In the meantime, just focus your attention on your new partner in life - your baby. I hope things will work out for you but remember k, we are here for you and your sister here also have had relationship problems. I can also tell you are facing it bravely and squarely and whenever you need other women to listen to you, like Lyn said, the kaypoh sisters are here
Will update you on any gathering next year too.
Miraclebaby
Made in GEH is even better, your future baby's life will be full of flowers and greenery like award-winning botanic gardens besides GEH
Antral count fluatuates every cycle, so you definitely got time to bu and reduced stress that will help with the counts. Lots of babydusts for your cycle next month. Sprinkle until you sneeze. Very soon, a junior miraclebaby will be made in GEH..
Jude
K, k, will go knock knock on your door when we go outing. Will broadcast here and also sms for those I know their handfone numbers
And of course I will keep babydusts for your Jude, spreading to you now liao..good that you have ovulated naturally, shows your eggs are eager to be fertilised and turn into baby (babies)…
To the three sisters jogging for sexier and baby-friendly bodies (Rostrum, Tigi and Miraclebaby):
Babydusts in truckloads..
Pat pat, its really not easy to have both parents needing medical care at the same time, a few years, ago, my mum underwent a major surgery and it made me at least one year older due to the worries and taking care of and I cannot imagine what is its like for two parents to be hospitalise at the time. Are they better liao? Discharged? Please pace yourself, caught time in between to have cat naps and they be be back in the pink of health soon!
Nevermind if pregnancy has not happened, as long as you are focused on other aspects of life (improving yourself, work, family), its good enough. And I won't let you be my child's godmother although of course I want as many people to love my child as possible
I will surely bug on on your handfone if got outing..and in these months of accumlation, I sure got lots of dusts reserved for you
Tigi,
Hehee…yes, this thread will make barbie dolls manufacturer very happy as a lot of potential demand here but will not make MILs very happy as they all seem to like babies with kuku birds ;p
Tigi, you are just taking a break before you reach the finishing line with style
Hey sister, I also in a male dominated line and one thing I realised is that no matter how hard we work, the bosses up there will always know that there is this chance that we might have kids, go on maternity and then take it easier. When I joined this co years ago, my col told me that my boss actually asked her if I wanted to have a baby and my col told him she did not know. This means that no matter how hard we work, there will always be some sort of discount already attached as we are women even if we did not publicly announce we want babies. Means bottomline line is, we must take care of our health first than career.
Rostrum,
Yes, maybe the time I send out the invites, we must let you decide where to eat as you will be suffering from morning sickness. Hope you suffer from morning sickness soon..heheee..
Yeah, I will defnitely update here....Rostrum and Tigi, its perfectly fine to be silent readers, just write whenever you feel like it k. And Rostrum is right, each one of us will our own timing at the best time. Let me share a piece of news from my family. My hubby's cousin just discovered she is pregnant after 8 years of marriage and I believe they wanted kids like one year into the marriage. The mummy is 39 years old and the daddy is about 45. She has reached the stage of not expecting anything and also started to do volunteer work and totally caught unware by the pregnancy. We are all surprised and cannot marvel at how unpredictable life is. Of course I am really really hope our sisters on this thread can strike soon in the future. Just that this new pregnancy in the family reinforces that there is always hope somewhere in time.
Gan,
Yes, I finished shopping liao leh
Hallow Elle,
Yes, I totally share your anticipation that it’s a new person in our life, with it will bring joy and also fear if can be a good mother. Like u, there are thoughts that crossed my mind if I can handle the baby's demands and cries with the right response. So in anticipation of this anticipation, I told myself that whenever the baby cries, I will look at her face and tell myself that is is a gift from the upper forces and the cries are actually a form of music that we have waited so hard and long to hear. Also, lets keep reminding ourselves that despite the fact that society's expectation for mum's are so high nowadays (I attended Mrs Wong's baby bathing class and she made it sound like a crime if the baby cries during bathing time and the mum cannot do anything to calm down the crying. She said a baby must enjoy a bath like doing spa. Yeah right. I was like thinking, please, my nephew used to cry everytime when sis bathes him and he is now a cheerful 9 year old running around messing my room), as long as our babies are well-fed, healthy (if sick, healthcare is easily accessible in modern day Singapore), clean, safe, we must try not to stress ourselves. I also try to comfort myself that last time, our parents bring so many of us up, without maids, we all turn out well. As long as we don't put so much expectations on ourselves, things will work itself out. K, lets do it together. I am sure we can. For the baby room, just need to do 3 things, just make a clean space in the cardboard (after cleaning, buy a $2 hippo dehumdifer to put there to prevent mold), and second is cleaning the cot with clean wet tissue and wash the bed sheet. Third thing is for baby's stuff that must be ready for every diaper change/miscellaneous activities, I bought a very cheap four tier plastic rank from Carrefour/(NTUC carries them too) and intend to put all the handy things like diaper cream, diapers there for easy accessibility. With these three "actions", the nursery room should be ready the babies plus u and me
For me now, like you, there are question marks and anticipiation and I try to simplify things and manage expectation on myself to manage the anticipition, I am not a christain, but I like to think of this phrase that my christain friends always say "god will only give us what we can handle", "will cross the bridge when reach it" and of couse the fact that this precious gift beats all fears to calm myself down when not sure if can be good parent. So if I can, you sure can, Elle, remember, you braved through 8 years for this gift and if you have gone through those tests, what else can defeat you? Think in the department of steadiness, you are the champion
Sister, whenever you feel overwhelmed, must come here to vent or we will be angry with you for not being "sister" enough k. In your relationship department, its unfair for me to conclude for you if it can be saved. However, can I share with you what I experienced. Again, not sure if its relevant but just share share no harm. I married my hubby after about 4 years of dating and during the time we married, quite a bit of unhappiness happened involving my MIL wanting to live with us, she feeling that I snatched her son and we were so caught up in that and the preparations that we also forgot to communicate and be nice to each other. Also, although four years is not a long time, its long time to start making us take each other for granted. The initiate stage of TLC disappeared over the years without us realising. When we came to realised it, we had several talking sessions to discuss what had happened and came up with a seemingly childish arrangement. That is to pretend that we just knew each other and started dating again. It had involved deliberate acts like planning for short trips and movie sessions but the feeling was rekindled. So now I know that feelings can be rekindled but someone has to make the first move and of course the other person has to reciprocate or both has to work together. This is an ongoing lifelong rekindling exercise that has to be worked on daily. If you think that this man in your life is still worth the effort, make the first move, and it can take a few months to make a diff. Invite your hubby to listen to two of you's baby heartbeat everyday on your tum tum (ask him to press his ears there, tell him you still love him, be needy, don't be manly, show him you need him as a woman and he as a strong man) Perhaps you have done so I am not sure. However, if you think that your feelings have changed too and it might not be worth it, I support your every decision and I am sure there is another person out there when you are ready, to give you that TLC. In the meantime, just focus your attention on your new partner in life - your baby. I hope things will work out for you but remember k, we are here for you and your sister here also have had relationship problems. I can also tell you are facing it bravely and squarely and whenever you need other women to listen to you, like Lyn said, the kaypoh sisters are here
Miraclebaby
Made in GEH is even better, your future baby's life will be full of flowers and greenery like award-winning botanic gardens besides GEH
Jude
K, k, will go knock knock on your door when we go outing. Will broadcast here and also sms for those I know their handfone numbers
And of course I will keep babydusts for your Jude, spreading to you now liao..good that you have ovulated naturally, shows your eggs are eager to be fertilised and turn into baby (babies)…
To the three sisters jogging for sexier and baby-friendly bodies (Rostrum, Tigi and Miraclebaby):
Babydusts in truckloads..
babygalore09
Member
Jude,
On top the babydusts, hope you will not see red down there for 9.5months..heeee..
On top the babydusts, hope you will not see red down there for 9.5months..heeee..
ellesie
Active Member
hi, babygalore.
Thank you for the concern and advice. To be truth, I indeed still love him but I can tell the feeling is no longer reciprocated. He can even tell his friends how torturous it is living with me. It hurts me.He bottled up a lot of feelings and all along I thot he was happy.It's really a rude shock to me as suddenly, I dunno who he is anymore. Now we practically are only like room mate.If he's in the mood, maybe he will ask how's bb doing and that is it. When i have an early contraction, I have to go down hospital on my own in limping pain because he refused to take my call though call him for numerous time. I know every story will have 2 sides to it but it's really painful for me to find out that all along he masked himself to face me. From the outside, everyone sees us as a happy family and so did I feel. But now it's time for me to face the reality.
He never asked for separation but it's unbearable for me, to live with someone you love but yet he's not happy.I'm willingly to let him go to pursuit his happiness after all the failed talks.It's not an easy decision for me to make but if it's the best for us, i dun see why not. I only hope there's no hatred between us.好聚好散。
Sorry if i made this thread as my venting place. I have noone to go to except my 2 best buddies and sisters here. whatever is going to happen next, i know i have to be prepared, sweet or bitter
Thank you for the concern and advice. To be truth, I indeed still love him but I can tell the feeling is no longer reciprocated. He can even tell his friends how torturous it is living with me. It hurts me.He bottled up a lot of feelings and all along I thot he was happy.It's really a rude shock to me as suddenly, I dunno who he is anymore. Now we practically are only like room mate.If he's in the mood, maybe he will ask how's bb doing and that is it. When i have an early contraction, I have to go down hospital on my own in limping pain because he refused to take my call though call him for numerous time. I know every story will have 2 sides to it but it's really painful for me to find out that all along he masked himself to face me. From the outside, everyone sees us as a happy family and so did I feel. But now it's time for me to face the reality.
He never asked for separation but it's unbearable for me, to live with someone you love but yet he's not happy.I'm willingly to let him go to pursuit his happiness after all the failed talks.It's not an easy decision for me to make but if it's the best for us, i dun see why not. I only hope there's no hatred between us.好聚好散。
Sorry if i made this thread as my venting place. I have noone to go to except my 2 best buddies and sisters here. whatever is going to happen next, i know i have to be prepared, sweet or bitter
Jude, was happy talking to u. Feel free to call me anytime.. but hor paiseh i lost ur number when i changed my HP. Perhaps u can sms ur hp num..thks
Elle, understand ur situation. Ur situation made me think back of one of my past relationship. I know wat u mean by u still love the person but it juz hurts u so much that he is actually pretending to be 'accomodating' to ur feelings in a not geunine way. But its rather tricky for u in the sense of course a complete family will be the best choice for ur bb but like babyg said ask urself whether is he still worth ur effort to make the relationship come to life again. Follow ur heart and also think carefully but ultimately wat decision u gtg to make u must be happy. We r all behind u!
Elle, understand ur situation. Ur situation made me think back of one of my past relationship. I know wat u mean by u still love the person but it juz hurts u so much that he is actually pretending to be 'accomodating' to ur feelings in a not geunine way. But its rather tricky for u in the sense of course a complete family will be the best choice for ur bb but like babyg said ask urself whether is he still worth ur effort to make the relationship come to life again. Follow ur heart and also think carefully but ultimately wat decision u gtg to make u must be happy. We r all behind u!
Elle, can understand the hurt you would have felt. When we were at the low times of our relationship, my hubby once told me he felt very "xin ku" in our marriage. when he said that, it was like a slap on my face as i didn't expect him to felt that way. much we have our differences in characters, our squabbles, i thought we are doing fine. It took us quite abit of effort to rekindle the passion for each other through dates, talking to each other and of course i myself learnt to control my fiery temper and be more patient. (my hubby is slow and steady type whereas i want things fast and quick)
Elle whatever decision you make, like Lyn said we are behind you. Look forward to seeing your daughter in few weeks time. I am sure she would be a bundle of joy that brings a smile to your face daily.No post natal blues! you will be happy taking care of her, feeding her, talking to her.Take care sis and we are here to hear you out.
Jude, Lyn, Rostrum, Tigi, Miraclebaby, tonnes of babydusts to you!
Yes during our gathering next year, we would see you with a sexy bump.
Babygalore it is always very encouraging to hear abt pple like your cousin getting preggy whether naturally or ivf. Yes i think i should shop now instead of waiting to third trimester. sometimes i wonder, i felt more tired was it because of my age, since i am hitting the big 4 in another 1 year plus. But this tiredness is a happy problem and i assume my daughter is just sucking up my energy while she enjoys her swim in my tummy.
Elle whatever decision you make, like Lyn said we are behind you. Look forward to seeing your daughter in few weeks time. I am sure she would be a bundle of joy that brings a smile to your face daily.No post natal blues! you will be happy taking care of her, feeding her, talking to her.Take care sis and we are here to hear you out.
Jude, Lyn, Rostrum, Tigi, Miraclebaby, tonnes of babydusts to you!
Babygalore it is always very encouraging to hear abt pple like your cousin getting preggy whether naturally or ivf. Yes i think i should shop now instead of waiting to third trimester. sometimes i wonder, i felt more tired was it because of my age, since i am hitting the big 4 in another 1 year plus. But this tiredness is a happy problem and i assume my daughter is just sucking up my energy while she enjoys her swim in my tummy.
Great! This thread is alive again
Gan, hi, how are you? Long time no chat. How are you and your lil one? I also hope to share my good news soon. Hope it will be real real soon. Haha.
elle, totally agreed! I used to keep arguing with dh about ttc and baby issue. Now I no longer does tt. Though sometimes I will feel depressed at times, but I will try to dismiss it later on with exercise and keeping myself occupied. Still trying v hard to stay +ve. At times when I feels down, I still force myself to be +ve.
miraclebaby, after missing for a long time so you go seek another Dr's help? Hope you have one made in Mt E v soon. Nevermind, take this time to bu and continue your jogging/brisk walking
I am v sure it will help. Hehe...I just came back from my jogging too! My dh now also go swimming. everytime he goes swimming, I will go jogging. While other couples are going for movies/shopping or enjoying a great dinner together. We are "slogging" away here. Hee...Really hope all our efforts will really pay off.
Lyn, great to see your post here. I will cycle within this year. Dh and I have promised each other that we will keep mum for this cycle. So i hope you will understand. Did you go back to Dr Loh?
Gan, hi, how are you? Long time no chat. How are you and your lil one? I also hope to share my good news soon. Hope it will be real real soon. Haha.
elle, totally agreed! I used to keep arguing with dh about ttc and baby issue. Now I no longer does tt. Though sometimes I will feel depressed at times, but I will try to dismiss it later on with exercise and keeping myself occupied. Still trying v hard to stay +ve. At times when I feels down, I still force myself to be +ve.
miraclebaby, after missing for a long time so you go seek another Dr's help? Hope you have one made in Mt E v soon. Nevermind, take this time to bu and continue your jogging/brisk walking
Lyn, great to see your post here. I will cycle within this year. Dh and I have promised each other that we will keep mum for this cycle. So i hope you will understand. Did you go back to Dr Loh?
babygalore, don't make me laff. Hahaha. I also hope by then I got the chance to decide what I want to eat lo due to MS. wahahahaha. your family news really tells us that there is hope in this world and we will not be abandoned!
I feel so happy and more relaxed in this thread. This thread is for relaxation and the other thread is for data collection. wahahahahaha.
I feel so happy and more relaxed in this thread. This thread is for relaxation and the other thread is for data collection. wahahahahaha.
elle, Sorry! Just read your later post. Sorry to hear about it and I do not really know why your dh can chg overnite? Really feel for you!
Did you have a heart to heart talk with him? Perhaps after letting him vent out his unhappiness, things might take to a good turn?
I sincerely hope he will come to his senses and receive the baby happily together with you next mth.
Did you have a heart to heart talk with him? Perhaps after letting him vent out his unhappiness, things might take to a good turn?
I sincerely hope he will come to his senses and receive the baby happily together with you next mth.
So happy to hear from you girls again! 
Thanks all for your encouragement, really hope to have a baby bump , sexy not sexy nvm
Gan, i am catching your baby dust and holding them dearly!
Miraclebaby, wow welcome to the jogging mummy wannabe club! When i started ivf, no antral follicle count was done for me... i remember there was some baseline scan, but it was to check if there was any cyst or smthg. Is that so impt? since during ivf, we will be stim to boost follicle growth?
Babygalore,i say mil who want kuku birds down there are just being kuku! To a woman who have difficulty conceiving, a child of her own is a miracle and god send. Who is gg to care about girl or boy. On the other hand, when i tend to think too much, I would rather worry if my girl in future will suffer the same childbearing problem like me when she grows up as a result of hereditary . Ya i know i think too much. 八字还没一瞥lor。。。
Elle, hope u r emotionally well... more worried if the tolls of natal blues has taken on you. I echo the sentiments of some sista here that it is unfair to judge the relationship between you n your hb n we shld not do so. You r welcome to vent out there. The sistas here shared many useful tips on how to keep that flame of love burning and i myself m giving them some thinking too! Nothing is more impt than maintaining a healthy pregnancy for you and your lil precious. A little suggestion is to relax, take it easy and that could apply to your attitude with your hb. That may take some pressure off for a while and maybe do some 'reset', bringing u guys back to the time when u just met, sweet moments during part tok, wanting to live each other，accomodate each other, learning to adjust... 退一步海阔天空。。。 Do it only to treat yourself better, gal!
Jude, are you same as judebabe whom i spoken to before? Sorry if i got the wrong person
Where r u doing ivf?
Lyn, *waves* glad to hear from you.I agreed about the roller coaster ride of a fresh cycle. We must really be mentally prepared, take your time we know our body best!
Thanks all for your encouragement, really hope to have a baby bump , sexy not sexy nvm
Gan, i am catching your baby dust and holding them dearly!
Miraclebaby, wow welcome to the jogging mummy wannabe club! When i started ivf, no antral follicle count was done for me... i remember there was some baseline scan, but it was to check if there was any cyst or smthg. Is that so impt? since during ivf, we will be stim to boost follicle growth?
Babygalore,i say mil who want kuku birds down there are just being kuku! To a woman who have difficulty conceiving, a child of her own is a miracle and god send. Who is gg to care about girl or boy. On the other hand, when i tend to think too much, I would rather worry if my girl in future will suffer the same childbearing problem like me when she grows up as a result of hereditary . Ya i know i think too much. 八字还没一瞥lor。。。
Elle, hope u r emotionally well... more worried if the tolls of natal blues has taken on you. I echo the sentiments of some sista here that it is unfair to judge the relationship between you n your hb n we shld not do so. You r welcome to vent out there. The sistas here shared many useful tips on how to keep that flame of love burning and i myself m giving them some thinking too! Nothing is more impt than maintaining a healthy pregnancy for you and your lil precious. A little suggestion is to relax, take it easy and that could apply to your attitude with your hb. That may take some pressure off for a while and maybe do some 'reset', bringing u guys back to the time when u just met, sweet moments during part tok, wanting to live each other，accomodate each other, learning to adjust... 退一步海阔天空。。。 Do it only to treat yourself better, gal!
Jude, are you same as judebabe whom i spoken to before? Sorry if i got the wrong person
Where r u doing ivf?
Lyn, *waves* glad to hear from you.I agreed about the roller coaster ride of a fresh cycle. We must really be mentally prepared, take your time we know our body best!
Hey I haven't been in action for a while cos' changed jobs few months back and busy with work. Haven't come into the thread for a while but pleasantly surprised to know some of you have struck! My congrats to you!
My first iui with dr Heng failed, currently doing so iui with Dr LC Cheng at TMC with Gonal F, eggs reached about 16mm yesterday and Doc has asked me to do hcg tonight, most likely will perform iui this Saturday afternoon.
Yesterday at the clinic, waited more than 2 hours and in the midst of so many pregnant women and kids running around, couldn't help feeling emotional again. Why do I have to go through so much to attain motherhood. And today read the news about number of babies abandoned every day.. how I wish I can have just one.
Hey I would really like to join a hangout among the forumers if there is one coming soon.. pls keep us posted =)
My first iui with dr Heng failed, currently doing so iui with Dr LC Cheng at TMC with Gonal F, eggs reached about 16mm yesterday and Doc has asked me to do hcg tonight, most likely will perform iui this Saturday afternoon.
Yesterday at the clinic, waited more than 2 hours and in the midst of so many pregnant women and kids running around, couldn't help feeling emotional again. Why do I have to go through so much to attain motherhood. And today read the news about number of babies abandoned every day.. how I wish I can have just one.
Hey I would really like to join a hangout among the forumers if there is one coming soon.. pls keep us posted =)
miraclebabyhopes
New Member
Hi ladies!
Rostrum/Tigi
am still with dr f at Glen E. He is one of those drs that insist on bloodwork and antral follicle count before starting cos to him not every cycle is as good and he wants to do the ivf in a cycle when everything looks more positive. The antral follicle count gives a base of potential mature follicles. So if not as many as compared to usual, he will not start. In my case, if I had started this month, may not have many left to freeze. So while i was disappointed to postpone, logic had to prevail.
Tigi
are all your 4 frosties at blastocysts stage? Heard that nuh does only freezing at blasts?
Lyn
I don't have the luxury of waiting too long as age is really catching up. Am closer to 40 than 35, so desperate situation calls for desperate actions, so to speak. Agree that for optimal results, must be mentally prepared. I try to not stress up but sometimes just cannot help it. Telling myself now that even if bfn, I am not any worse off than now in an attempt to ease the pressure.
Elle
I don't know how to say help your marriage. I have been married more than 10 years now and this ttc journey has definitely taken a toil. Just 2 weeks ago, hubby was completely stressing me out by wanting to stop his vitamins despite his less than ideal sperm morphology and motility. This had been going on for weeks till I reached my breaking point. I packed my bags and took the cars keys to drive off to my mum's place to stay with intention of leaving. It was at that point that hubby apologised, begged me to stay and agreed to takes his vitamins. That was kind of a wake-up call for him. Since then, we are not arguing as much, going for weekly exercise together and started a new hobby of prawn fishing! Long story but my point is that sometimes, one party needs a bit of a stimulus to know realize that the relationship cannot be taken for granted. Counselling sessions have worked for some couples as well. Who knows, hemay feel different when baby is out. And if not, you are not alone...you have your daughter and we are here to hear out.
Rostrum/Tigi
am still with dr f at Glen E. He is one of those drs that insist on bloodwork and antral follicle count before starting cos to him not every cycle is as good and he wants to do the ivf in a cycle when everything looks more positive. The antral follicle count gives a base of potential mature follicles. So if not as many as compared to usual, he will not start. In my case, if I had started this month, may not have many left to freeze. So while i was disappointed to postpone, logic had to prevail.
Tigi
are all your 4 frosties at blastocysts stage? Heard that nuh does only freezing at blasts?
Lyn
I don't have the luxury of waiting too long as age is really catching up. Am closer to 40 than 35, so desperate situation calls for desperate actions, so to speak. Agree that for optimal results, must be mentally prepared. I try to not stress up but sometimes just cannot help it. Telling myself now that even if bfn, I am not any worse off than now in an attempt to ease the pressure.
Elle
I don't know how to say help your marriage. I have been married more than 10 years now and this ttc journey has definitely taken a toil. Just 2 weeks ago, hubby was completely stressing me out by wanting to stop his vitamins despite his less than ideal sperm morphology and motility. This had been going on for weeks till I reached my breaking point. I packed my bags and took the cars keys to drive off to my mum's place to stay with intention of leaving. It was at that point that hubby apologised, begged me to stay and agreed to takes his vitamins. That was kind of a wake-up call for him. Since then, we are not arguing as much, going for weekly exercise together and started a new hobby of prawn fishing! Long story but my point is that sometimes, one party needs a bit of a stimulus to know realize that the relationship cannot be taken for granted. Counselling sessions have worked for some couples as well. Who knows, hemay feel different when baby is out. And if not, you are not alone...you have your daughter and we are here to hear out.
Hi sisters,
Long time no chat here…
Elle
My heart goes out to u..pls stay strong for your little ones.. whatever decision u make, we are all here for u..
Lyn,
Hope both of your parents are well now..pls take care of yourself too..
Babygalore,
Hi Hi,
thanks for remember me..I’m fine, I din login for a long time cos’ have nothing to update myself here..Congrats on your little princess..Can I join u all for the outings??
Gan,
Congrats for your bb princess..Enjoy shopping for the cutest things!
Hope to catch all the bb dusts for my future use! Take care, Sisters!
Long time no chat here…
Elle
My heart goes out to u..pls stay strong for your little ones.. whatever decision u make, we are all here for u..
Lyn,
Hope both of your parents are well now..pls take care of yourself too..
Babygalore,
Hi Hi,
thanks for remember me..I’m fine, I din login for a long time cos’ have nothing to update myself here..Congrats on your little princess..Can I join u all for the outings??
Gan,
Congrats for your bb princess..Enjoy shopping for the cutest things!
Hope to catch all the bb dusts for my future use! Take care, Sisters!
hopewaves, all the best for your iui this Sat. Good luck
Sometimes I also wonder y I hv to go thru this and start to emo again. But I try to be +ve cos I kw it is v impt esp if we are going to hv a try in ivf. I hope aft my last failure, I m more calm and settled now.
Sometimes I also wonder y I hv to go thru this and start to emo again. But I try to be +ve cos I kw it is v impt esp if we are going to hv a try in ivf. I hope aft my last failure, I m more calm and settled now.
Elle, miraclebaby have pointed out couselling session which i wanted to mention to u too... Pls go for a marriage counselling. At least u have try to save ur marriage...
Miraclebaby, yes i totally understand abt the desperate action u have mentioned. I used to be like that in the past coz my plan is to be pregnant by 30. But now that i m already 2 years passed my ideal age of conceiving i m very very sian already. I remembered when i failed my ivf in april and hubby was in Shanghai and we had a big fight via MSN. I told him i got no hope of conceiving... gave him 3 choice 1)adoption, 2)live without a child, 3) ask another women to gv birth for him.. Honestly speaking i was totally devasted. Sometimes men juz dun understand the pain of not conceiving as a women and sometimes not accomdating ie not taking their vitamins etc. So i guess all of us here have a fair share of rough patch during this ttc-ing journey...
As for dr f he is really a good doctor but i find he not much of a risk taker which is good and bad... Anyway relax coz u r in good hands..
Rostrum, yes when i think of gtg thru everything again i feel like fainting. Yes i went to dr loh last week and juz started on DHEA. I will not start till early next year and i m also thinking whether to try ivf again or not or maybe juz leaving things to nature..
Miraclebaby, yes i totally understand abt the desperate action u have mentioned. I used to be like that in the past coz my plan is to be pregnant by 30. But now that i m already 2 years passed my ideal age of conceiving i m very very sian already. I remembered when i failed my ivf in april and hubby was in Shanghai and we had a big fight via MSN. I told him i got no hope of conceiving... gave him 3 choice 1)adoption, 2)live without a child, 3) ask another women to gv birth for him.. Honestly speaking i was totally devasted. Sometimes men juz dun understand the pain of not conceiving as a women and sometimes not accomdating ie not taking their vitamins etc. So i guess all of us here have a fair share of rough patch during this ttc-ing journey...
As for dr f he is really a good doctor but i find he not much of a risk taker which is good and bad... Anyway relax coz u r in good hands..
Rostrum, yes when i think of gtg thru everything again i feel like fainting. Yes i went to dr loh last week and juz started on DHEA. I will not start till early next year and i m also thinking whether to try ivf again or not or maybe juz leaving things to nature..
Hi hopewave, yes i got have the very sour feeling when i c pregnant women and kids in clinic but i tell u now i m very numb liao. Nowadays i juz tell myself this is others' blessing but GOD will also gv us our blessing when the time is here. So hang on... goodluck for ur iui
miraclebabyhopes
New Member
Lyn
I think I know what u mean by dr f not taking risks. He is not too aggressive in his approach and he believes in giving only what is proven to work. So he does not do DHEA and he tells me I don't need growth hormones. Post transfer, he will give me aspirin and steroids this time to help with implantation. Some drs will straight away give more medication right at the outset eg. CARE etc.
It's always v scary to embark on this ivf journey again especially if we have already experienced bfn. The next cycle, you develop a phobia and can't go through it with the innocent confidence you had in the first cycle. So must be mentally strong and tell oneself that even if it doesn't work, you are closer to your goal than before u started. Jia-you!
I think I know what u mean by dr f not taking risks. He is not too aggressive in his approach and he believes in giving only what is proven to work. So he does not do DHEA and he tells me I don't need growth hormones. Post transfer, he will give me aspirin and steroids this time to help with implantation. Some drs will straight away give more medication right at the outset eg. CARE etc.
It's always v scary to embark on this ivf journey again especially if we have already experienced bfn. The next cycle, you develop a phobia and can't go through it with the innocent confidence you had in the first cycle. So must be mentally strong and tell oneself that even if it doesn't work, you are closer to your goal than before u started. Jia-you!
Noi *waves* how r u?
Hopewaves all the best to ur iui! Babydusts to u.
Rostrum, been doing fine, at the 1/2 way mark.=) went for a quick scan with dr loh today and he commented that the fluid on my waterbag is borderline, something he didn't like to see, ask me rest more. Given 3 days mc till next wed . Got me alittle worried but I m sure bb will be fine. Will learn to relax.
Babygalore u r right abt unhappy mil.... Ha ha today I finally found out my mil is in denial abt me having a girl ! My hubby was telling her not to always say pple stupid as I m preggy with our daughter and she insisted loudly that my bb is a boy...no wonder she likes to ask if I go scan I think not so much to see if my girl is growing well but if the scan shows the ku ku bird. Like tigi said for pple like me who took so long to get preggy, all we want is healthy and happy bb and the mils are wishing for boys.
Hopewaves all the best to ur iui! Babydusts to u.
Rostrum, been doing fine, at the 1/2 way mark.=) went for a quick scan with dr loh today and he commented that the fluid on my waterbag is borderline, something he didn't like to see, ask me rest more. Given 3 days mc till next wed . Got me alittle worried but I m sure bb will be fine. Will learn to relax.
Babygalore u r right abt unhappy mil.... Ha ha today I finally found out my mil is in denial abt me having a girl ! My hubby was telling her not to always say pple stupid as I m preggy with our daughter and she insisted loudly that my bb is a boy...no wonder she likes to ask if I go scan I think not so much to see if my girl is growing well but if the scan shows the ku ku bird. Like tigi said for pple like me who took so long to get preggy, all we want is healthy and happy bb and the mils are wishing for boys.
Lyn, dun worry! Takes things at a time. To tell you the truth I have been delaying each mth. I shd hv started a few mths ago, but each time when AF reports, I got the cold feet. And I call KKIVF on the 1st day of my AF to postpone the cycle to next mth instead of getting the date for 1st jab. I also hv the fear
Ladies, wld like to vent a little. Was at a family gathering just now. My dh's...It is a very big family gathering, so it is impossible for me to avoid cos I know the relatives will keep asking abt bb issue. Sometimes I wonder whether they are concerned or insensitive or ignorant. They can be v persistent in asking each time we meet up.
As expected today is not ask, today is sarcastic!!! Says my FIL's neck breaking la, our family is the smallest la. Ask us to Jia you la, all the cousins whom get married earlier than us has already given birth la. Even those younger cousins also give birth liao la...
I was quite angry and feel like shouting at them "PLEASE LA, U ALL NOT SICK OF ASKING EACH TIME? IT IS V OBVIOUS THAT A COUPLE MARRIED FOR SO MANY YEARS EITHER HV PLMS CONCEIVING OR DUN WAN TO HV KIDS MEH". I wonder why they can't be more sensitive and keep their mouths shut and keep asking. IT IS NOT WE DUN WAN TO HV KIDS WHAT? We have tried everything under the sun and even went thru IVF, so what you want now?
Sorri for the caps but I am really v pissed!
As expected today is not ask, today is sarcastic!!! Says my FIL's neck breaking la, our family is the smallest la. Ask us to Jia you la, all the cousins whom get married earlier than us has already given birth la. Even those younger cousins also give birth liao la...
I was quite angry and feel like shouting at them "PLEASE LA, U ALL NOT SICK OF ASKING EACH TIME? IT IS V OBVIOUS THAT A COUPLE MARRIED FOR SO MANY YEARS EITHER HV PLMS CONCEIVING OR DUN WAN TO HV KIDS MEH". I wonder why they can't be more sensitive and keep their mouths shut and keep asking. IT IS NOT WE DUN WAN TO HV KIDS WHAT? We have tried everything under the sun and even went thru IVF, so what you want now?
Sorri for the caps but I am really v pissed!
ellesie
Active Member
Rostrum
*hug hug*.I know how pissed off u are. Have u ever "suan" them back in order to shut them up or u always being the nice person? For me they are not being concerned, but more of being insensitive. Like last time, whenever they ask us to jia you, y never give birth all sorts of craps, i will just answer them. Wah, u guys envy us is it? cos now u all got no life on ur own. Haiz, so pitiful. For me, it works. i really dun give them face cos they mean nothing to me.
At least u dun have to face them everyday asking the same question. Mine last time is have to face my mil's same question almost everyday cos we stayed together. Up to the point, she thot i'm having contraceptive pills and ransacked my room. After futile effort, she started to show me all those adoption articles and will even call my mom to ask whether can find me a child to adopt or not. There are much more ridiculous things that she did, which slowly build the hatred in me. She likes to brag what she will do if i preg, will make nutritious meal for me, make bird nest bla bla bla. But now I in my week 37, she never even asked how am I doing. Irony right?
Those relatives sometimes must really teach them a lesson to shut them up. Dun be sad ok? we are all here for you.
Gan, hahaha. ignore ur mil. my mil is also the same type but she's a hypocrite. She can even tell my mom tat she's a non bias. Boy or gal doesn't matter as long as having healthy grandchildren. But action says otherwise. All those she promised she will do once i preg, none is done. hahahaha. But it's a blessing in disguise also, so she won't have to involve in caring the bb. Yeah!
Miracle bb, thank you for sharing ur story. This yr will be the 10th yr of my marriage. But maybe will be the end to it as well. Our problem is not a 1-2 day issue. It has been accumulated I dunno since when. He never shows me or tell me he's not happy all these while. Of cos we do have our quarrel days but it's always settled within the day. Tat's y it comes as a shock to me, when he told others he had a torturous life with me these 9 yrs. I am more sad than angry honestly. Suddenly I dunno who he is anymore. If i think about it, indeed his care and concern is getting less and less as days passed compared to our old days. But it never occurs to me that it's because his heart is no longer there. I thot it's the work stress and ttc causing it. That is why I decided to let him go although he never asked for separation directly. But i know he tells others he would like to divorce and enjoy his life. Maybe his pride stopping him to ask for separation directly. So I request instead but he never gives me an answer.
Now we practically still a room mate and since my request for separation, he indeed shows his concern more about bb. I dunno is it my negative thot or not, but I can feel he din do it from his heart. I really dunno whether he has any agenda behind. For now, i do not want to think too much. I only pray tat if we are really meant together, we will be but if it's the end, then i hope we can separate amicably.
Lyn, i also think of marriage counselling but it will only work if both parties want it. Now it will be only my side so i give it a miss.
Noi, Tigi, Jude, thank you so much for the support. It really helps me a lot. I am not a local here. my only support comes from close frens and sisters here. So really appreciate it
Babygalore, remember to control the pocket, ok? there will be endless shopping after ur ah gal comes out. hahaha. i know it's very hard to resist cos now even almost near to delivery and have bb's stuff more than enough, I still cannot keep my eyes off from those sold in the fair.
Hopewaves, dun despair. U have joined the correct group here, the never say give up ladies. grab as much support as u can as ttc is indeed never an easy journey. But take me as example, dun let ttc strained ur relationship, ok? lots and lots of bb dust for u.
I hope i din miss to address anyone here. Early in the morning, my eyes din really cooperate. hahaha.
Now i am looking for the day when my gal arrives. She's the one that gives me the strength to go on each day.I really feel blessed
*hug hug*.I know how pissed off u are. Have u ever "suan" them back in order to shut them up or u always being the nice person? For me they are not being concerned, but more of being insensitive. Like last time, whenever they ask us to jia you, y never give birth all sorts of craps, i will just answer them. Wah, u guys envy us is it? cos now u all got no life on ur own. Haiz, so pitiful. For me, it works. i really dun give them face cos they mean nothing to me.
At least u dun have to face them everyday asking the same question. Mine last time is have to face my mil's same question almost everyday cos we stayed together. Up to the point, she thot i'm having contraceptive pills and ransacked my room. After futile effort, she started to show me all those adoption articles and will even call my mom to ask whether can find me a child to adopt or not. There are much more ridiculous things that she did, which slowly build the hatred in me. She likes to brag what she will do if i preg, will make nutritious meal for me, make bird nest bla bla bla. But now I in my week 37, she never even asked how am I doing. Irony right?
Those relatives sometimes must really teach them a lesson to shut them up. Dun be sad ok? we are all here for you.
Gan, hahaha. ignore ur mil. my mil is also the same type but she's a hypocrite. She can even tell my mom tat she's a non bias. Boy or gal doesn't matter as long as having healthy grandchildren. But action says otherwise. All those she promised she will do once i preg, none is done. hahahaha. But it's a blessing in disguise also, so she won't have to involve in caring the bb. Yeah!
Miracle bb, thank you for sharing ur story. This yr will be the 10th yr of my marriage. But maybe will be the end to it as well. Our problem is not a 1-2 day issue. It has been accumulated I dunno since when. He never shows me or tell me he's not happy all these while. Of cos we do have our quarrel days but it's always settled within the day. Tat's y it comes as a shock to me, when he told others he had a torturous life with me these 9 yrs. I am more sad than angry honestly. Suddenly I dunno who he is anymore. If i think about it, indeed his care and concern is getting less and less as days passed compared to our old days. But it never occurs to me that it's because his heart is no longer there. I thot it's the work stress and ttc causing it. That is why I decided to let him go although he never asked for separation directly. But i know he tells others he would like to divorce and enjoy his life. Maybe his pride stopping him to ask for separation directly. So I request instead but he never gives me an answer.
Now we practically still a room mate and since my request for separation, he indeed shows his concern more about bb. I dunno is it my negative thot or not, but I can feel he din do it from his heart. I really dunno whether he has any agenda behind. For now, i do not want to think too much. I only pray tat if we are really meant together, we will be but if it's the end, then i hope we can separate amicably.
Lyn, i also think of marriage counselling but it will only work if both parties want it. Now it will be only my side so i give it a miss.
Noi, Tigi, Jude, thank you so much for the support. It really helps me a lot. I am not a local here. my only support comes from close frens and sisters here. So really appreciate it
Babygalore, remember to control the pocket, ok? there will be endless shopping after ur ah gal comes out. hahaha. i know it's very hard to resist cos now even almost near to delivery and have bb's stuff more than enough, I still cannot keep my eyes off from those sold in the fair.
Hopewaves, dun despair. U have joined the correct group here, the never say give up ladies. grab as much support as u can as ttc is indeed never an easy journey. But take me as example, dun let ttc strained ur relationship, ok? lots and lots of bb dust for u.
I hope i din miss to address anyone here. Early in the morning, my eyes din really cooperate. hahaha.
Now i am looking for the day when my gal arrives. She's the one that gives me the strength to go on each day.I really feel blessed
Good morning elle, you really wake up v v early!
I can't really say the relatives back as my hubby's big family is v close knitted. If I really talks back, then it is like not behaving properly or no respect to them. It is the elders tt keep asking. Those relatives close to our age will not ask at all. They are more understanding.
Everytime there is such gathering, I always like to give excuses and siam. But ytd's is really cannot. Sigh! So hv to go.
Each time they ask. I can only smile and act ignorant. Then I will feel sore inside and come back will complain to dh. There is nothing else I can do. Yesterday I even dreamt tt they keep asking abt me.
The impact is too great!!!
Yr mil is really too much to invade in yr privacy leh. And if she cannot fulfill certain things, please ask her dun talk too early!!! Talks are free!!! She is a NATO only!
elle, I am not sure you are from where? But it is v impt to have family support at this point of time. Yr mum can't come to Singapore to take care of u?
Bt he did show concern when u ask for separation right? Perhaps he din really want a divorce and trying to be more collected and think abt what he wants to do next? Things might not be so bad, dun tink too much. Ok?
I can't really say the relatives back as my hubby's big family is v close knitted. If I really talks back, then it is like not behaving properly or no respect to them. It is the elders tt keep asking. Those relatives close to our age will not ask at all. They are more understanding.
Everytime there is such gathering, I always like to give excuses and siam. But ytd's is really cannot. Sigh! So hv to go.
Each time they ask. I can only smile and act ignorant. Then I will feel sore inside and come back will complain to dh. There is nothing else I can do. Yesterday I even dreamt tt they keep asking abt me.
Yr mil is really too much to invade in yr privacy leh. And if she cannot fulfill certain things, please ask her dun talk too early!!! Talks are free!!! She is a NATO only!
elle, I am not sure you are from where? But it is v impt to have family support at this point of time. Yr mum can't come to Singapore to take care of u?
Bt he did show concern when u ask for separation right? Perhaps he din really want a divorce and trying to be more collected and think abt what he wants to do next? Things might not be so bad, dun tink too much. Ok?
Hi elle and rostrum, u all wake up si early? Got flu and juz woke up with a blur mind....
Elle, well if ur hubby does want to take the first step to solve the problem then its the one at fault is ur marriage cant be saved. He is slienlty giving the marriage up. I have seen older frds who went thru the stage u gtg thru now. There is a potential possiblity that u will be facing legal matters ie ur custody of ur baby if u ask for divorce first. So if he doesnt mention anything abt that perhaps he is still doing so soul searching so maybe gv him sometime. I know someone u r juz so tempted to have a clean break and put everything behind so as to move on but hang on first.... R u still staying with ur MIL? she know abt u and ur hubby problem? Is she sincerely want ur marriage to be saved and a cute granddaughter she shld talk to her own son...
babyg and gan ur mil really so old fashion. My mil once told me before that she prefer me to have a gal coz having boys is hardship for parents coz need to worry alot abt their future coz ie a good career etc (its coz my mil had 3 sons herself). I m quite touched that my pil is quite open minded ppl but sad to say that till now i cant even have a gal for them yet.. sometimes really very sad to disappoint them...
Rostrum, its rather annoying to have such relatives.. Whenever i hear such remarks i will also keep quite but gv them a very black face. Mouth is on their face we cant control wat they say but we can choose to not let all these stupid remarks get us down. Maybe ask ur hubby to tell them off? My hubby got one particular uncle who is very jealous of my hubby familiy coz my mil got three sons ands they have 4 gals so he feels inferior all the while, so eversince me and my hubby got married 5 years ago he will ask my hubby why no baby yet dun have or dun want. There is one time my hubby told him off loudly and from then on he dun dun dare to ask again. Very irritaing specimen right? These ppl need to be scolded by ppl then they will wake up. So dun be sad or angry juz treated them as stupid anuntie and stupid uncle! We still live our life for ourselves
Elle, well if ur hubby does want to take the first step to solve the problem then its the one at fault is ur marriage cant be saved. He is slienlty giving the marriage up. I have seen older frds who went thru the stage u gtg thru now. There is a potential possiblity that u will be facing legal matters ie ur custody of ur baby if u ask for divorce first. So if he doesnt mention anything abt that perhaps he is still doing so soul searching so maybe gv him sometime. I know someone u r juz so tempted to have a clean break and put everything behind so as to move on but hang on first.... R u still staying with ur MIL? she know abt u and ur hubby problem? Is she sincerely want ur marriage to be saved and a cute granddaughter she shld talk to her own son...
babyg and gan ur mil really so old fashion. My mil once told me before that she prefer me to have a gal coz having boys is hardship for parents coz need to worry alot abt their future coz ie a good career etc (its coz my mil had 3 sons herself). I m quite touched that my pil is quite open minded ppl but sad to say that till now i cant even have a gal for them yet.. sometimes really very sad to disappoint them...
Rostrum, its rather annoying to have such relatives.. Whenever i hear such remarks i will also keep quite but gv them a very black face. Mouth is on their face we cant control wat they say but we can choose to not let all these stupid remarks get us down. Maybe ask ur hubby to tell them off? My hubby got one particular uncle who is very jealous of my hubby familiy coz my mil got three sons ands they have 4 gals so he feels inferior all the while, so eversince me and my hubby got married 5 years ago he will ask my hubby why no baby yet dun have or dun want. There is one time my hubby told him off loudly and from then on he dun dun dare to ask again. Very irritaing specimen right? These ppl need to be scolded by ppl then they will wake up. So dun be sad or angry juz treated them as stupid anuntie and stupid uncle! We still live our life for ourselves
Ladies, wish to hear from u ladies wat u thing abt adoption..
Juz my personal thought, recently i have been very tempted to adopt a gal. Have bought this issue to hubby but he is not supportive and say that he is not ready. He didnt want me to think abt this since he feels that we still have rooms for trying harder. I feel that gtg adoption doesnt mean that we r gving up right, after adoption we still can try if lucky we may end up with 2 kids? Hubby feel that i m too navie and he feels responsibility is too much to bear to rise others' kids.. Sigh dilemma...
Juz my personal thought, recently i have been very tempted to adopt a gal. Have bought this issue to hubby but he is not supportive and say that he is not ready. He didnt want me to think abt this since he feels that we still have rooms for trying harder. I feel that gtg adoption doesnt mean that we r gving up right, after adoption we still can try if lucky we may end up with 2 kids? Hubby feel that i m too navie and he feels responsibility is too much to bear to rise others' kids.. Sigh dilemma...