Child Access Issue

Should court be pro-joint custody when parents cannot communicate?

  • Yes, it helps the child growth

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Implement compulsory counselling sessions for 6 months

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Implement clearer perimeters for both sides to comply

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    1

Christina Li

New Member
I have so many questions about child access.

I'm divorced for 4months and joint custody with care control to me. This few months is crazy for me as we are always on constant debating regarding the access.

1) he have access on 2 weekdays (4-9pm) and 1 weekend (2-9pm), have to give me advance notice of at least 24 hrs.
2) 2 travel trip per year up to 7 days each trip, inform one month ahead.
3) access on first day cny
4) access on child's actual birth date

My issue is we can never reach an amicable decision.

I always have to wait for him to tell me which weekday he bringing kid out. I can never plan in advance. Can I tell him which days I like to bring Kid out? or can I reject some of the day he request and ask him rework his schedule? What is my perimeters as care and control? I have no intention of refraining him to see his kid but I'm fed up that I have to keep waiting and follow his schedule and not able to make plans with My kid in advance. (He say I cannot plan, is he plan?!!? If I plan I restrict his access.)

Recently he brought kid overseas. Flight was on sun, so I tot I can spend the day with my kid on sat. He say no, trip is trip, weekend access is weekend access. Insist that sat is his and sun is also his. Then when back, I wanted pick kid up at airport since they reach back 7pm. He say no. Court order say he need to send back to residence and no time limit stated.

So cny this year falls on sat, then same he say sat is cny, sun is his again and Mon access again is his! Can I reject sun? I also wan spend time with kid.

Birthday same again. Say kid birthday is 28. he wants bring him overseas 24-29! Then I request for him to shift a day later so 24 sat I can celebrate earlier he say no he inform me way ahead already.

I seriously think court order is too brief with too many loopholes with such idiots. Is there anyway I can work this out? Lawyer? Redraft court order? I need know what I can do, so I don't turn crazy with constant debating like this.
 


gladjo

Active Member
U hv the kids care n control ... u hv priority over his schedule .. why are youb accommodating to his schedule n why do u need him to agree to your schedule ? If he can't agree...thats really his problem.
 

Christina Li

New Member
as I'm not sure the care and control perimeters is consist of what, and he keep saying its as per court order. problem is order never state so clearly. I really need some professional guidence on what is the perimeter as this guy always twist the words and hard to communicate with him. I going crazy over such stuff and constant have to debate and end up i give way cause I dont want my kid to feel or sense the unhappiness.

like why i cannot pick up kid from airport. just because order states that kid needs to be return to residence doesnt really mean literally ma.
 

gladjo

Active Member
Tell him to apply a Vary order on this ...bet u he sure get shot down by court... u hv 1 thousand and 1 reasons to say u comply n what can he proof. PM.me if unsure

Its not easy to apply a vary order n its alot of $$. So what can he do if siddenly ur kid lao sia n fever n throw unreasonable tantrums ..what can he proof.
 
Last edited:

desparate_wife

Active Member
I have so many questions about child access.

I'm divorced for 4months and joint custody with care control to me. This few months is crazy for me as we are always on constant debating regarding the access.

1) he have access on 2 weekdays (4-9pm) and 1 weekend (2-9pm), have to give me advance notice of at least 24 hrs.
2) 2 travel trip per year up to 7 days each trip, inform one month ahead.
3) access on first day cny
4) access on child's actual birth date

My issue is we can never reach an amicable decision.

I always have to wait for him to tell me which weekday he bringing kid out. I can never plan in advance. Can I tell him which days I like to bring Kid out? or can I reject some of the day he request and ask him rework his schedule? What is my perimeters as care and control? I have no intention of refraining him to see his kid but I'm fed up that I have to keep waiting and follow his schedule and not able to make plans with My kid in advance. (He say I cannot plan, is he plan?!!? If I plan I restrict his access.)

Recently he brought kid overseas. Flight was on sun, so I tot I can spend the day with my kid on sat. He say no, trip is trip, weekend access is weekend access. Insist that sat is his and sun is also his. Then when back, I wanted pick kid up at airport since they reach back 7pm. He say no. Court order say he need to send back to residence and no time limit stated.

So cny this year falls on sat, then same he say sat is cny, sun is his again and Mon access again is his! Can I reject sun? I also wan spend time with kid.

Birthday same again. Say kid birthday is 28. he wants bring him overseas 24-29! Then I request for him to shift a day later so 24 sat I can celebrate earlier he say no he inform me way ahead already.

I seriously think court order is too brief with too many loopholes with such idiots. Is there anyway I can work this out? Lawyer? Redraft court order? I need know what I can do, so I don't turn crazy with constant debating like this.
U have a lawyer, get him to fix this, seek for a professional way out of this. This is a forum, there are many who teach u wrong thing and will cause unnecessary stress. Don't ignore this as it's long term. Get a peace of mind
 

gladjo

Active Member
Call Family Court ..they can direct u since alot of u trust lawyers so much. Google the family court tel number..they have officers manung the calks or go down to family court level 1 ...instead of paying $500 for half hr for a consult n end up with $6-10k for a simple summons.

Bet u dont know what is a Vary Order n the difficulty to get it. Spending $$ the right way is ok but not when its for lawyers. Many of u will not believe cos you are not entirely in legal circle n many of u are happily paying lawyers when its a simple submission n representation.
 
Last edited:
don't need go look for lawyer who much $500 for half hour consultation.
Definitely, we have to spend some money, but spend it wisely.
Look for lawyer within your budget.
We are not legally, not take thing into your hand and create more problem and delay the process
 

Top