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Breastfeeding Advice Needed

Discussion in 'Motherhood, Pregnancies And Babies' started by jessa12, Apr 16, 2008.

  1. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Hi all..need some advice.

    I didnt BF my 2 older kids when I had them cos tey dun wan to latch on n it was so tiring coaching them to latch on.. tey take to the bottles like fish in the water though!! So for both, I had to pump out my milk n only expressed n fed them for 2 mths as I was working.

    Now tat I m due for my 3rd n is now a SAHM, i wan to try to BF directly. But ve phobia fr last 2 experience tat he may not wan to latch on too. Till now I m still considering wan to get pump to standby or not in jus in case. Any experience mum can advice me?

    I envy mummies whom I saw in shoppin ctr BF their kids in the nursery. Tey dun ve so much barangs barangs to carri w/ them when tey go out. Jus nee to find sm place private, sit down n BF.

    Any advice is hugely appreciated n welcome cos I reali wan to try BF directly n be sucessful tis time. Btw, wat is a inverted nipple n does it reali ve a huge impact on whether u can BF?

  2. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Jess,

    Congrats on your 3rd baby and trying to bfeed. Thats a very positive attitude. I think first and foremost, having a positive attitude helps. You must think that you can do it no matter what. Don't let your previous experience deter you.

    I breastfed my son for 11 months, through direct and also expressing out. From my experience, I delivered in Mount A and immediately after I delivered, abt within half an hour, the nurse brought my baby to me to latch for 5 to 10 mins, so i find that helps alot, and I also read that getting the baby to latch within half to 1 hour of being born will make it easier to breastfeed later on. So maybe you can try that when you deliver? When I was in the hospital, my baby was brought to me every 3 hours to be fed and he was not fed from the bottle at all, so i think it helps even though the milk supply may not be established yet.

    I did not get a pump until 2nd or 3rd week, so I don't think you need until after you deliver? You can try to latch direct first and if successful, can delay buying a pump until later.

    You can read up more on breastfeeding in the Breastfeeding Mother's Support Group website at www.breastfeeding.org.sg

    And if you have any problems, just approach the lactation consultant in your hospital. Good luck!
  3. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Hi Blueydoo,

    Tks for yr encouragement.

    I delivered my 2nd one in KKH, n immediately after tey weighed him, the nurse actuali brought him to me for BF but i was so exchusted tat I refused to BF him. In fact I only ask to see him the next day after I was rested n refreshed. Tried to BF him then but he simply refused lor so was very rejected tat time n then sort of like gave up. I was thinking to myself then tat its ok since I can expressed out my milk n also my elder daughter was not BF directly too.

    Now tis time round, since its my last child n I a SAHM, I reali feel encouraged to give it a try at BF. I will perserve on n wont give up tis time. My sis-inlaw who BF her 2 kids till tey r abt 2 yrs old tell me tat the 1st few times is always the most diffcult cos there will b some pain or discomfort but once we get the hand of it,its very e z.

    I will approached my lactation consultant at KKH n see how tey can help me. 1 question - will we get breast engorgement if we BF?
  4. wan

    wan Member


    I was also not successful with bfing my 1st baby direct. but I managed to learn from experience and bf my 2nd baby until now, 6 mth already.

    Like what blueydoo say, positive thinking is very impt. it is actually quite painful if the latching on is not accurate, but u will get the hang of it. try to bf as soon as u r ready, of course rest is impt as well, cos without rest, stess= no/ slow milk production. I started bf the 2nd day after c-section delivery. Initially not much milk, a little colostrum. I supplemented with formula b4 milk comes in around 4th day. I pumped out excess milk to store during maternity leave. now still pumping at work, but supply lower after 6 mth.

    Stay confident, as baby can sense mummy is nervous.

    regarding the engorgement question, may have to massage or hand express to relieve. I was on MC one day I had whole day meeting, no time to express at work. Felt like having 2 stones in front of me. ooucch!
  5. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Jess,

    I think its good that you are so determined. Thats already half the battle won. Positive attitude is very important. Like what Wan said, If the baby latches correctly, you won't feel pain at all. When the baby latches, you must make sure their mouth opens really wide and not just sucking on your nipple.

    During the 1st month, just concentrate on bfeeding and not care about anything else. Once you get the hang of it, it will be easy. You just need to keep trying and not give up easily.

    Whether you have engorgement or not depends on many things. For myself, I was quite lucky as I did not really have engorgement throughout my bfeeding period. But at times when I prolonged pumping, then you will feed your breasts start to be abit painful and very huge. But don't worry about this. It doesn't happen often.
  6. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Hi Wan n Blue,

    Wan, tks for yr encouragment too. Tat time I also felt like having 2 rocks in front of me on the 3rd day!LOL...n also end up in hosp cos of high fever n inflamation until my sis-inlaw cm to my rescue w/ cold cabbage leaves n hot towels..HAHAHAHA

    I understand I ve to keep myself clean to feed the bb? Wat do u all do? bathe b4 every feed or jus clean/ wipe the breast b4 feedin? Any special creams I nee to stand by now or get anything since I m rdy to BF tis time? Isit true tat I ve to watch wat I eat?
  7. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Jess,

    Yes, have to keep yourself clean. I don't bathe before every feed. That will be too much. I usually just use a small towel rinse with water and wipe my breast. Maybe you need to standby nipple cream, in case you get sore nipples.

    I also bought the avent nipple shield in case of sore nipples, but I only used that once or twice.

    Yes, you have to watch what you eat as your baby will get most of the nutrients from your food. I remember last time I lovedd durians and I ate that once while breastfeeding. And my baby had rashes after that. But I can't be 100% sure its related.

    And of course to increase breastmilk supply you need to eat alot of fish, learn how to make the papaya fish soup etc.
  8. wan

    wan Member


    Basic hygiene is sufficient for bfing. no need to sterilise...(meant to be a joke la!) For bottlefeeding, u need to check water temperature, clean bottles, amt of milk powder etc. I think bfing will be easier for u since u have to take care of 2 other children.

    standby some cream and nipple shield just in case. For my 1st baby, i asked my hb to go buy for me during my confinement, cos can't go out myself. for the 2nd baby, I got all standby, but hardly used. buy lots of breast pads too. I felt uncomfortable with my bra/ breast pad rubbing against my sore nipple. sometimes, I go braless at home, but when the milk comes, I have to run to get a towel! my milk used to drip all over the floor and ants came! haha...

    find urself a comfortable place to bf. esp when u have older children, they will come and disturb baby. my son will try to seek attention initially when I feed meimei. I have to explain to him I fed him like this when he was a baby (didn't tell him he didn't latch on properly la) I also mastered the lying down position for the night feeding.

    If u think there is a blocked duct, try to massage it asap before it becomes engorged. The longer u wait, the more painful it gets. that is also speaking from experience. 1st time scared of pain, don't dare to press/ massage. It also helps stimulate milk flow...

    drink lots of water to replenish lost fluid.
  9. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Hi Blue n Wan,

    wow..looks like I ve to get the nipple shields, breast pads, nipple cream, disposable milk bags, abt 5 extra bottles (too much??) to standby liao. Didnt no its necessary. I will also standby FM lor cos hubi wan me to feed FM n BF together, especially FM at nite so tat baby can sleep longer n I can rest.

    Dune think my 2 older kids will seek my attention while BFing cos 1 is 12 yrs n the other is 6! But tey will mos properly b curious..LOL

    Now lived together w/ FIL n a granny-IL. So wan to go braless also diffcult or even BFing in the living rm!!! Smtimes missed those days when I had my own house!

    I still ve phobia abt blocked ducts!! I hope w/ regular BF, i wont get them!! tey r a nitemare!! Crossing my fingers n hope I dun get them again cos my last 2 I had painful blocked ducts!!
  10. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Jess,

    Ya, seems like you got most of it covered and Wan's advice is very useful. Actually I think if you want to feed FM, I think you should feed that during the last feed at night, around 10+, 11+ or midnight. Then during the middle of the night feed, you can just latch your baby. I find it is easier.

    Then for the last feed at night, your hubby can also be the one to feed the baby so you can get an early rest and do the middle of the night feed. During the middle of the night feed, I also used the same position as Wan, lying down position so it is easier for me also.

    Wow, your kids' age gaps are quite far apart. But I think the good thing is they are more sensible and old enough to help you with the baby, so in addition to your husband, your kids can also help you.

    I agree with you on going braless, thats why I'm thankful don't have to live with my PIL.
  11. wan

    wan Member


    I tried to give my bb formula for last feed initially, but she also want to suckle somemore. so I gave up, just let her latch on as much as she want. she still wakes up 2 times at night at 6 mths, but I'm enjoying the bonding time with her (which I missed with my son)...

    milk bag no need to buy yet if u r not storing for long term as u won't be gg back to work. FM also no need buy yet cos hospital normally give a dozen of glass bottle kind to take home...

    ur eldest already 12 years old, pri 6 going to sec 1 already! that is another stage of motherhood. I don't have stamina liao. mine 3 years difference. 18 years later, I want to 'relief' my duty & retire...
  12. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Not e z now to handle kids especially one who will b goin thru her teen phrase!! I behave differently w/ each of my kids. My gal I treat more like friend but still strict w/ her sch work, behaviour etc. My son still a bit manja but slowly teaching him to be more independent like feeding, bathing himself n not running to him everytime he starts to whine or fall down etc. Now tis 3rd one i ve to start all over again but Im glad abt it cos i always wan 3 kids! :) But will "close factory" after tis cos also dun tink ve stamina (or milk!!!!) liao..hahaha

    I will try out the method of feeding FM b4 bb sleep n wake in middle nite to BF. How often do I nee to BF? Isit a as-n-when thing or ve timing like feeding FM or isit each bb ve different timing?
  13. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Jess,

    Yes I can imagine how you need to handle each kid differently. Anyway very peifu you for being able to handle 3! Am thinking of when to have my 2nd one. But afraid of how to handle the 2nd child while coping with the 1st child.

    Wan - Your baby now 6 mths? How does your elder child react? Jealous or protective of baby? Do you find it easier to cope or much lesser time for yourself? Am also worried that won't be able to breastfeed as long for 2nd child as elder child may be disruptive.

    Jess - My timing last time for bfeeding was every 3 hours. But sometimes my son can latch for as long as 1 hour. I will just feed on demand which is roughly 3 hrs. Each baby is very different. Like my friend's daughter feed every 2hours. It depends on how much they drink etc..
  14. wan

    wan Member


    I feed baby on demand. Initially very siong. After discharged from hospital, really tiring as it felt like baby didn't leave my breasts at all! She still dunno difference between day & night. Slowly, she adapted to the routine. I kept the record of feeding & change of diapers from birth to 1st month to monitor the input vs output


    the decision when to have the 2nd baby is a tricky one and there is no ideal answer. many told me should wait until 5 years. But I calculate, by the time I try (if unsuccessful), I will be over 35. So I told myself, 3 yrs ok as mine both c-section (1st due to breech, 2nd due to size)

    how old is ur son now? When my son was around 2, I asked him if he likes someone to play with him & grow up together. he gave me a blank look. when I was pregnant, he sayang my tummy & sing to baby, so much so that meimei can recognise his voice after she was born. amazing. Then we did the gift-exchange thingy. I also shared my exp with other mothers on another thread (can't find liao)

    Anyway, ALL didn't help! after discharged from hospital, my son was super jealous. I have to make sure he doesn't hit meimei or scream into her ears.

    not to scare u la, but every boy react differently. just to prepare urself for the 'battle'...6 mths later, he sayang meimei now that he realises we still love him as much after meimei's arrival.
  15. blueydoo

    blueydoo Member

    Hi Wan,

    Are you a SAHM? I think 5 years age gap is too big. I think maximum should be maybe 3 - 4 years. So if I want a 3 year gap, I should be trying soon. My son is now 17 mths.

    Anyway I am quite certain my son will be jealous due to his age and also his personality. He is very sticky to me. But with my hubby and PIL's help, cos my MIL takes care of him now when I am at work (I work part-time), I think he will get used to it. Eventually he should get used to it. And when the baby grows up, I'm sure they will be playmates.

    Its just the initial stage we need to overcome which I am quite afraid of. But this will happen sooner or later...
  16. wan

    wan Member

    I'm FTWM. I changed job after I had my son cos didn't have time & energy after work. Current job is better. My son is sticky to MIL. not as close to me. so I told my hb I want to be more hands on for my 2nd bb.

    Jealousy can't be avoided. my son was the 1st child on both mine & hb side. no cousins to play w until meimei came along. can imagine how pampered he is.

    he is now 3yr old, at the exploring stage, always doing something naughty to test our limit. I managed to bond w him during my 3mth maternity leave. if u get help from hb & PIL like me, shouldn't b an issue. talk to ur son & explain to him with pictures of family w 2 kids. my son likes the OCBC kids saver advertisment. he can relate to the little boy, little girl & the parents (cartoon quite ugly though...)

    Jess, sorry to change the subj. u may have some tips for us how to bond the siblings?
  17. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    Hi mummies,

    haha..tips?? no tips lah..jus based on trial n error, now still learning fr mistakes also!

    I also go thru a tough stage when my gal was small cos inexperienced n I tell u those were crazy days. Then when my 2nd one cm along, tat time my gal was 6 yrs old, I ve to make sure I m not biased or show any favourlism lor. Take turns w/ hubi to bond w/ each child. Then when my son strike the terrible 3's, tats when i start to punish him if he pushed buttons n test his boundaries n disturbed his sister etc. Same go to my gal if she's at fault.

    Usually will separate them 1st,calm n pacify them, then talk to them indivually b4 handing out punishments. Then make both of them apologised to each other depending on who's at fault 1st.

    Last time used to scream at my gal, then realised tat by screaming at her not effective at all, only make her more stuborn n our bond wasnt so strong. So change tactics by changing myself, i ve to cool down 1st b4 handleing her. Practise makes perfect or mayb cos i aged liao i becom mellow?? LOL

    Now both of them r very close to each other. tey still get in2 mischef but tey dun fight jus minor squable but make up very fast w/ each other.

    The punishment thing I read fr books borrowed fr library.
  18. wan

    wan Member

    My son is at the terrible 3 stage. But as compared to meimei, he is quite honest type. I can sense meimei is the cheeky type. At 6mth, she knows how to trick u. Her cries are 'fake'. I think she will bully her brother when she is older.

    I can say they are very close now. Meimei will look for bro to play. But I still have to watch in case he gets rough

    Jess, when is bb no.3 due?
  19. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    My no.3 due in 23 june but i tink will b early cos my 1st n 2nd all early by 1 n 2 wk. Now feeling like a bloated whale n walking like a penquin!

    Cant even sit on the floor or on low stools! Ve prob getting up. At nite ve prob, sleepin too! Sleeping on my left side but when turn to the other side, reali quite tough!

    Starting to feel very tired easily now n I ve not even prepare anything!!Too lazy n busy! Now my gal having her mid-yr exam so I m b z coaching her. Will only start preparing after her exam is over. Tk gdness her exams r in the 1st wk of May n I due only in late june else sure panick attack!! LOL
  20. wan

    wan Member

    Pregnant woman is not supposed to sit on the floor anyway. My son wanted me to play toy cars with him when I was heavily pregnant. I told him meimei inside, cannot play. I just sit on the sofa & give instruction...

    Guess it will be natural delivery for u? I'm someone with 2 kids but never experienced contraction (except braxton hicks) & natural birth. Felt abit disappointed in this area, but rewarded with my 2 beautiful children.

    I hope my children will not suffer under school pressure. My son hasn't attended nursery at 3 & everyone is quite shocked when I told them. I will enrol him in neighbourhood PCF N2 next year. I wish they can learn how to live life to the fullest rather than focus on academic achievements. But I guess when PSLE & O level kicks in, I may contradict myself. hahaha
  21. jessa12

    jessa12 New Member

    u mean u ve c section? I scare of the after pain tats y opt for natural birth..LOL

    My oldest also didnt attend nursery at all.jus go straight in to K1 n she's doin fine. Like u, i wan my kids to ve fun while tey can. But my son i sent to nursery cos he's very shy so wan to expose him to kids his age, but i also didnt emphasie too much on his acedemic results..jus as long as he enjoy school. Now he's in K2 n still ve so much fun tat i dun ve prob getting him to wake up to go sch everyday.

    Compare to him, my sis-inlaw's son had to learnt so many things! Ve art, piano, hanyupinyin class, reading programes etc etc...i hear areadi also scare! N he turn out to be so serious like a little adult n smtimes he scare me w/ his knowledge of things! n becos he dun ve time to play at hm, so whenever he cm over on wkend n play w/ my son (1 yr different nia) he end up quite diffcult to handle when its time to go hm.

    But smtimes i also cant help n will tend to compare lor..then feel like my son very slow like tat. But c my nephew so "not cute", i change my mind again..lol

    School pressure sure ve a bit. Now my gal sitting for PSLE, I also contradict myself lah. But which parents dun wan the best for their kids? I told her as long as she can go express stream n to a gd sec sch then ok for me liao.
  22. wan

    wan Member

    Yes. both c-section. 1st bcos of breech. 2nd was too big n no dilation after due date. I always tell myself I must bf them longest poss since I can't deliver them naturally. I read somewhere that c-section baby did not go through the birth canal, higher risk of getting asthma. but touch wood, so far so good...

    my son is very talkative at home, but shy in front of other children. he can talk to old people though cos he is surrounded by old people. I will send him to N2 next year. scared of all the HFMD now. my colleage n 3 kids all got it. MC for 2 wks.

    As a FTWM, I have limited to spend with my 2 children. I will teach them piano, hanyupinyin & reading myself. Now teaching my son colouring & drawing. He just drew an abstract art version of papa today. hahaha
  23. piggy_mummy

    piggy_mummy Member

    i got a problem here, my 8 weeks old boy only prefer 1 breast, i seldom latch him, i stay at home, i express milk put n let hin drink, bt find it very troublesoom coz i am alone with him, i cant find tine to pump coz he keep want to be carry. somomore at nite husband n me have to wake up together, coz i do pumping n husband feed him, feel very tired, esp husband have to work.

    initially he latch on, bt after i have introduce bottle, i thk he prefers bottle, may b the flow faster.so how? i feel very guilty for nt latching him since i stay at home..
  24. mummy_lee

    mummy_lee Member

    Hi piggy mummy,

    I thought my boy prefers only my left breast, until my doc pointed out to me that it's becos i wasnt positioning him well when he's on my right breast (cos im right handed).

    Since you're a SAHM, put him to your breast as and when he wants it, that way your milk supply will also increase, save you the trouble of having to pump out as well.

    My boy is 5 weeks old now and I struggled with BF initially, and always topped up with FM. Ive only just started total bf again. Dun feel guilty about giving him the bottle. Do away with all negative feelings.

    Good luck.
  25. althea

    althea Member

    Hi mummy_lee,

    I have the same prob as you. My bb is now 4 weeks old. I'm trying to breastfeed him more but my milk supply has always been low. Only manage to get 1/2 ounce from my left breast each time I pump. How about yourself?
  26. akachan8

    akachan8 New Member

    Hi mummy-lee and althea,

    I am having the same problem and I got so stressed because of the low breastmilk supply. My baby is going to be 3 weeks soon and I still haven't established enough milk supply for him. I feel so bad having to supplement him with formula everytime after his feed.

    My question is, should I supplement him in the first place? From articles that I read, we are encouraged to latch our baby on to bring in more supply. But if the baby doesn't have enough, I feel so stressed seeing him cry but at the same time, afraid that the formula milk I give will interfere witht he demand and supply logic of the milk production?
  27. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    Hi Mummies,
    I really am in need of some serious advise here..
    I am wanting to stop breastfeeding my 15 mth toddler (pumping) and decided to just pump once this morning and no more pumping for the future.

    I ended up in the night with extremely sore,enlarged breasts, swollen, itchy and very painful and its just impossible to do anything or even sleep!

    How do u stop breastfeeding without having the pain and engorgement...? Is it to slowly cut down on pumping rather than all at once...? How is it done ?
  28. jiayi

    jiayi Member

    Soho: hv to slowly do. u hv to cut down 1 pump by 1 pump for a few days each. Your body will need time to adjust to stop producing so much milk.
  29. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    Jiayi: Thanks!! a Milll!!..will try to cut down on pumps from 6..now i m trying to go down to 2..a day, hopefully can stop soon, do u hv any idea how long approx it will take to go off milk supply ?
  30. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    Thanks Jiayi!! Am trying to reduce the frequency and lengthen the timing now..hopefully can cut off supply soon..since I understand BF reduces chances of conceiving..had been so fruitless for more than half a yr..
  31. jiayi

    jiayi Member

    Soho: it's depends on indiv. For me, it took a few days for the milk supply to drop when I first cut one pump n lengthen the time. After that the duration shorten, 2 days the milk supply will drop.

    If u r already having regular period, then bfeeding shld not be s hindrance to u for trying to conceive.
  32. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    Jiayi: Thanks so much for the advise..it's so re-assuring to know regular period will not hinder conception.. I had my menses 5th month after delivery and had a fright when recently read articles online mentioning it is form of contraception...:\

    For now, Hope supply reduce...i also lost a lot of weight BF.
  33. jiayi

    jiayi Member

    BF is a natural form of contraception if your mensus doesn't come, meaning no ovulation. But no mensus during bf also doesn't mean a woman is infertile, is just less fertile. Since u r having regular mensus means u r ovulating, so can try conceive. ;)

    BF increase methobolism rate, that's why can stay slim. Good mah! Helps to lose weight after birth.
  34. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    Hehe...ya save money no need to go slimming centre.

    Been trying for abt 7-8 months but did not conceive..hiyoh dunno must try like how many times a mth..already tried so hard and few times..
  35. jiayi

    jiayi Member

    Maybe u r too stress trying to conceive, so can't conceive? It's not how many times u try in s month, it's the period that u try. Must try during fertile period, depending on ur mensus cycle. Anyway, just keep trying n enjoy the process! [​IMG]
  36. sinnyy

    sinnyy Active Member

    thanks jiayi..yeah will try to think less and maybe things will happen naturally..
  37. flowerbaby

    flowerbaby New Member

  38. iceeblue

    iceeblue Member

    Selling my Medela Pump In Style Advanced Backpack

    Bought a few months ago and I've only used for 3 months. It's almost like new in perfect condition. Selling it now as I've just stop breastfeeding. It's a US set and I'll throw in the voltage converter FOC.

    Price: $220

    It comes in the complete set in the original box which includes:
    - Instruction manual
    - Pump motor
    - Battery Pak
    - AC adapter
    - Removable cooler bag with cooling element
    - 4 BPA free bottles with lids
    - Double pumping kits with Personal Fit breast shields
    - 1 pair of valves and membranes
    - 1 pair of tubings

    Self collection at my place (if you wish to try the pump motor) or at Toa Payoh MRT/ Queenstown MRT.

    Please PM me if interested. Thanks!
  39. sweetevil

    sweetevil New Member

    Breast feeding is good, every drop is beneficial and great, especially in the important first few months.

    What you are doing now is wonderful. The baby is going to receive that very important colostrum that is full of fats, proteins, and leukocytes which will help the baby fight infection. What a great start to life. Even if it's just for a few weeks, it's a wonderful gift to the baby.
  40. dustinscott

    dustinscott New Member

    one should give more importance to the breast feeding of your child because moms milk is very good for the child's health. it gives various different forms of minerals that cant be found anywhere. hence breastfeeding is must.

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