HI All,
I would like to seek some advice here.
I am married for 7 years, have 1 girl (6 yrs) and 1 boy (4 yrs), both in childcare ctr at my workplace.
We have been sleeping in separate rooms since the birth of my boy in 2013. Mon-Fri, we dont see him, as he is sleeping when we go off school/ work, and he only returns home when we are asleep. He only get to see the kids on weekends, even then, he need work on some saturdays. I am the one who take care of the kids, bring them see doc, and took leave during the childcare closure dates.
In Sept 2017, i discovered smses on his HP that he went to visit prostitutes in JB. The smses indicated the room number, time, prostitutes name and charges for services. The smses showed that he paid for the services in Apr, May and Sept at a named hotel in JB. As i am unable to send the smses to my phone, i took screenshots of the smses. He did not deny when i confront him.
We talked in Oct 2017, and he agreed verbally to agreed to all my conditions (i.e custody of both kids and transfer flat to me) if i wanted to Divorce. But he said he want to stay in the marriage and agreed to improve and spend more time w the kids.
Since Oct to now, i dont see any improvements. I told him I want to proceed with Divorce and now he is not responding at all.
We only have the HDB Flat as matrimonial assets, which we bought in 2009. I have checked with HDB that based on my CFP balance and income, i should be able to finance if he transfer his share to me. Even if he is not agreeable, i am willing to sell off an get another resale flat on my own.
My questions are:
(1) Can the smses be counted as evidence for adultery? I do not want to apply D based on this, but given that he is not responding now, i am worried he may chu pattern. If so, i understand the validity is 6mths.
(2) Or can i based on the fact that we slept separately since 2013 Jun to apply for D? What if he is not agreeable? Do i need to do up a separation deed to formalise this or i just wait till 4years to apply D without consent?
(3) Based on my situation above, will i be able to get care and control of both kids? Or will Judge separate them?
Sorry for the long post. Appreciate if anyone has similar situation and can advise. Thanks in advance!!