40 and above pregnant club

But how come it is advised to relax and do not stress over baby making? Technically, isn't just by doing the needful will do? I.e. Sperm meet eggs and timing. What has Gan jiong and stress gotta do with not being able to get bfp? It's so hard to relax my mind.
 


Unfortunately for some couples, including myself, baby making is not a logical flow chart.

After 2-3years of trying (EVERYTHING that may contribute to making a sperm meeting an egg), we gave up attempting and focus on other things in our life. That took away like you said, stress. Specifically baby-making stress. And then things happened when we least expected it. I've heard many couples shared that such happened to them too. So there must be a certain degree of validation. At least that's what I believe. I think I cannot under estimate the power of stress (or the adverse of it). All the best to ladies here.
 
Anyone who is trying to have a baby, my friend who is a nurse recommended me to share with my client
Good IVF - Dr LC Cheng from Thomson Medical
Good Gynae - Dr Wk Tan and Dr Magdalene Tan
 
yes been reading all your posts ever since u posted all the tries mus say u are very positive person . yes been well but no luck for 2nd one for past 4 yrs
 
Hi all, like elpis, I'm 42 with 2 kids oredi. Absolutely didn't expect to have another baby but just tested positive on the test. Emotionally unsteady at the moment.

Elpis how did u take it so well?
 
Hi galili,

I can understand how you feel. Me too, have 2 kids, 11 and 14 and I am 40 this year and am pregnant with the 3rd one now (10 weeks now). It came as a shock to me as we did not planned for this pregnancy and also my kids being so big already. The thought of starting all over again at this age is just so scary.

We had thought of not wanting to continue with this but eventually decide to have the baby as I don't think I can live with the guilt of killing my own child.

My kids were very happy and excited to hear that they are going to have a little sibling although that may means not going for any overseas trip for the next 1-2 years.

Take some time to accept the news and think about it. I took 3 weeks before deciding and telling the kids about it. Although it won't be easy, but I am sure we can do it if we want to!

Jiayou!!
 
Hello galili and girlgirl27, I'm the oldest here at 44 but am expecting my first child. It's nice to hear the elder siblings are excited about an additional member.

Of course I am also wary about energy level like when my child is 20, I'll be already so old to do anything with her. This baby comes as a surprise after years of TTC, when we gave up eventually. It's a late blessing. However my hubby is much younger than me so we kinda talked about it before that later stage, perhaps most "work" will be fulfilled by him for our child.

Wishing you both smooth deliveries.
 
girlgirl27, i just went gynae and cfmd it today. hb is happy and i'm absolutely not. honestly I was hoping and thinking.. maybe i wun hear baby's heartbeat. so bad. so sian to start all over right? imagine all the late nights again. but yes, have to take it as God's blessings. my friends after years of TTC can't conceive whereas we took precautions and still got it. had to be God's gift then.

redvel, congrats! you'll find the joy and take it at your own pace w the kid when the baby is out. to experience the process is better than none at all.

Let's all jiayou!!! Meanwhile.. i have to re-buy all my stuff again.
 
btw, did you all join any other groups? I was thinking of 2017 Jan mummies but the ppl there seemed way too young. like 26-28! i'm more than an animal cycle away.
 
Hi galili,

Yes, I had the same feelings as you. Mixed feelings going through my mind at that time. Thinking if there's no heartbeat, then I won't have to make the decision. But I feel so bad and guilty just thinking of that. Now I feel relieved since we have decided to continue with this pregnancy. Me too, have to start buying everything again. When will you be due?

No, I did not join the Jan 2017 thread as I feel the same as you. Mums to be in that thread are all so young so I am just a silent reader.
 
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Thanks galili.

I'm in July EDD thread. Although high chance I'm popping in June. I think there are good mixture of age group there. I'm not the only one at 40s for sure.
 
girlgirl27, there's nothing in there to read now right? cos all the jan 2017 are now on Facebook.
my EDD is end Jan 2017. Yours?
 
Hi galili,

Yes, nothing much to read now. I am due 1st week of Jan 17 and just had my blood test done last week instead of amniotic fluid test. So happy that the results came back good. How about you?
 
galili said:
Girlgirl27, mine is end Jan EDD. Did you join their FB group?

Redvel, how exciting! Kp us posted!
Click to expand...

Hi galili, wishing you a smooth smooth delivery in Jan.

I've popped on 1Jul. Today brought home my LO. The delivery was a smooth one. In summary, I was induced at night on 30June and then waterbag raptured on 1Jul morning. Within 3hrs or so, I was fully dilated and told to push. My LO was out within few pushes. It was an amazing experience.
 
I think I was in good hands of my gynae. Despite my age at 44, he knows I want to try natural and he is pro natural too. He says he will let me try but plan B is by certain time if really not possible, csect is the way. He didn't push away the possibility of going natural at older age.
 
hello mummies, I am 39yo this year and just found out that I am pregnant with my 3rd kid. my 2 boys are 10yo & 7yo this year. this is my 11th wk and I am just feeling so uncertain about this pregnancy. Hubby and I are hesitant because by the time we are 50, the youngst is only 10yo. EDD is end Jan next year because this will be my 3rd c-section. Cant imagine going through waking up at nights for feed, diaper chnge etc again...
 
Hi rojakz,

I can understand you perfectly. Me too, was in the same situation as you 2 mths ago when I found out that I am pregnant with no 3, with 2 girls aged 14 and 11, big age gap huh.

Was so confused too, worried about having to start the diaper changing, night feed etc all over again, especially when I am already 40 this year. I got married and gave birth young as I hope my kids are big when I turn 50, so I don't have to worry much and we can enjoy life by then. But here comes this big surprise, that spoils all our nicely planned journey.

However, after thinking through, we have decided to carry on with this little blessing from God. My gals are very happy that they will be having a little sibling soon. Yes, it will be tough, at least for the 1st 2-3 years but I am sure it will be an enjoyable and exciting journey for us too, when we hold our little baby in our arms.

Take care, rest well and don't think so much.

By the way, ladies, I have a few brand new maternity top/bottom to let go as they are either too big or too small for me. I am a size M/L. Do pm me if you are interested or drop a note here! Thanks.
 
Hi all, I'm 39 with 2nd one otw. My first one is 3yo and now I'm so tired...must be my age tough to manage a toddler and a newborn and we haven't even break the news to her. She already has queer behaviour...
 
Hello girlgirl27, when is your edd? Haiz your eldest 2 are girls so im sure they can help with the bb. Mine are both boys, make me worried for them cos my ds1 at 10yo still slightly blur blur one. This time round im experiencing night sickness and indigestion at night. so different from my 1st 2 pregnancy. Easily tired too... haiz

Hello cheewy, when i gave birth to my ds2, can see my ds1 was jealous cos of the age gap. So its not easy for you especially your gal is still young. when is your edd?
 
rojakz said:
Hello girlgirl27, when is your edd? Haiz your eldest 2 are girls so im sure they can help with the bb. Mine are both boys, make me worried for them cos my ds1 at 10yo still slightly blur blur one. This time round im experiencing night sickness and indigestion at night. so different from my 1st 2 pregnancy. Easily tired too... haiz

Hello cheewy, when i gave birth to my ds2, can see my ds1 was jealous cos of the age gap. So its not easy for you especially your gal is still young. when is your edd?
Click to expand...

Hi, my Edd is in Mar 17. We are still thinking how to break the news to her. We have subtlety asked her if she likes to have a baby bro or sis and her reply was "NO, papa and Mimi is mine"
 
My edd is 8 Jan. I also suffer from very bad indigestion during the 1st 2 mths. It is much better now, only can't eat much at night else I will get heartburn.
 
hi redvel, congrats on your first born. How's your confinement? enjoying your new status?
I'm also high risk mommy and am expecting my no. 3. Actually still in dilemma if to keep. Really can feel the toll on my health.
 
leocub said:
hi redvel, congrats on your first born. How's your confinement? enjoying your new status?
I'm also high risk mommy and am expecting my no. 3. Actually still in dilemma if to keep. Really can feel the toll on my health.
Click to expand...
Thank you. I enjoyed my confinement. Now that CL has left a few days ago, the real deal has begun.

How old are your 2 elders may I know? How far along pregnant are you? As far as most ppl will hope you'll keep, it's only you who are going to face the strain. I'm sure you're giving it a good thought.
 
Hi ladies. Just turned 45. Been ttc for 2years and mc twice. Menstration is usually 28days, this month is 26days. What bothers me is my period only last for 1.5 days which is not normal. Mentioned to gyneas and they didn't give any comment. Any ladies facing the same problem? I'm so afraid is sign of menopause. Told TCM my problem and he asked me to continue with his medication. But it has been Afew months, and no improvement on my short period. Can anyone share with me if you have the same problem?
 
leocub said:
hi redvel, congrats on your first born. How's your confinement? enjoying your new status?
I'm also high risk mommy and am expecting my no. 3. Actually still in dilemma if to keep. Really can feel the toll on my health.
Click to expand...

I'm facing the same dilemma as you. I actually arranged for a TOP before week 12 but changed my mind at the very last minute. After deciding to keep, I found out that the chances of bb having DS is very high, 1 in 32. So now I'm waiting for the Harmony test results to come back to see if everything is alright. *fingers crossed*

I also feel that having #3 at my age is very tiring. I'm around week 14 but still feeling lethargic and lacking in energy. I find myself prone to taking afternoon naps! lol... any mommies feel the same in their 2nd trimester? Supposed to be more 'energetic' during 2nd trimester but I dont feel it in my case...
 
shuqin said:
Hi ladies. Just turned 45. Been ttc for 2years and mc twice. Menstration is usually 28days, this month is 26days. What bothers me is my period only last for 1.5 days which is not normal. Mentioned to gyneas and they didn't give any comment. Any ladies facing the same problem? I'm so afraid is sign of menopause. Told TCM my problem and he asked me to continue with his medication. But it has been Afew months, and no improvement on my short period. Can anyone share with me if you have the same problem?
Click to expand...

Hello Shuqin, I think if the gynaes and your TCM doesnt think anything is out of the ordinary, everything should be ok? Otherwise, you may want to get a 2nd opinion from another gynae?
 
Hi all, Im 40 this year and have been trying for 4th one.. I feel that its so hard to get pregnant at my age but then, i see so many of you here all get preg and make me feel not to give up again!
 
MummyPooh88 said:
Hi all, Im 40 this year and have been trying for 4th one.. I feel that its so hard to get pregnant at my age but then, i see so many of you here all get preg and make me feel not to give up again!
Click to expand...
If only I started young I would love to have four :) Good luck on 4th time blessed. Jiayou.
 
MummyPooh,

Really glad to see you here. I am 41 an I am trying for my 4th too. Had a miscarriage in June, not giving up yet but I also need to keep an open mind about it not happening. By the way, how old is your third child?
 
Wow really envy u all leh. I dun have much family support so 4 is definitely out for me. If I got jus one more will be good
 
oh wow.. i'm surprised that so many still trying after passing 40? for #3 or #4 some more!!!
and here i m getting into despair when i realized i'm having a kid at 42... again!

hey.. no one answered me on getting CL! hahahhaa..
so what's the take? especially for 2nd or 3rd timers?

rojakz, usually ultrasound can tell.. from the neck fluid thickness. my gynae told us all is well so we didn't bother to go for all the tests. detailed scan they will also double confirm.

shuqin, did your gynae rule out infection? i also thought i had early menopause at one stage but ended up it was infection. apparently there's quite a few symptoms associated with menopause so i doubt you are getting it. all the best in ttc!

girlgirl27, me too! having heartburn at night! and ended up vomiting. i'm gaining so much weight that it's crazy! gynae advised me to walk more to help in digestion. Maybe you can try?
 
Hi galili,

My heartburn is much better now. Appetite has returned but I try not to eat so much for dinner so I won't get heartburn.

As for CL, I don't intend to get 1. My mil helped me with the 1st 2 confinements and she will also help me this time round. But as she's working, she will try to apply for 1mth unpaid leave. My hubby will also take leave to help out.
 
@galili My CL is from PEM. I presume you're asking on recommendation?

If you're keen to try her or have specific qns, can PM me.

And congrats. I really miss being preggie :)
 
Dear mummies , glad to find this thread . I'm 40 and having my no 6 . My friends have all move out from this level , their kids are of my older kids age . So I am trying to find a support group that are still having baby at this age to journey together ! Hopefully our babies can be friends in time to come too .
 
Mambo no 5, congrats on #6! it's fund to have a big family. Having 4 other siblings myself, I know it's fun... lol. Whats the age gap of your children?

galili, i tend up taking the DNA test. lucky the results came back alright and at the same time, I found out that my #3 is gg to be a boy also. Cant imagine having 3 boys man. 2 + 1 hubby already a headache. Next time, I'm definitely gg to be overruled and overwhelmed by all the testosterone in the house! I don't think I'll hire a CL, probably get my mom to help out and get those confinement catering.

Anyone tend to be more bochap about #3/#4? I am actually. I am drinking more coffee and while I practise moderation, I just eat whatever I want also. hehe
 


Hihi....I am new.
Wow so surprised to see so many above 40 & yet still trying!! I thought I am the only odd one.... :D
 
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