(2011/05) May 2011

wayne_mummy,

i tell my boy the same that if he runs away without waiting for daddy/mummy then bad people catch him he cant find daddy/mummy le..and no more milk n cartoon for him. hahaha.

i think boys are like tat lo, cant walk "properly" de, coz they only know hw to jump/run. hahaha.

I believe God has his plans for u when he gives u 2 boys =)

true la, go sec sch will wan to go out with friends...go out with parents will be like asking them to pluck stars frm sky..so this is why actually my hb wans me to resign when #1 (my boy) goes to pri sch liao...so i can help to guide him on the sch wk and also to "keep" an eye on him already...

hahaha. talk abt karma...then mine will be karma too =P



auroa,

u are rite...mummies more emo than daddies...the last time i cried was when i bring my boy to KKH A&E coz he dwn with high fever of 39degrees+. dun wan med n throw up and go hosp keep crying n clinging dun wan let doc examine...see liao i cried lo...my hb says i really bo liao...big things cry, small things oso cry -_-'''

1st time my boy cough for prolong period n PD says he got mild brochitis, i oso cried =P

ya! that is wat i feel lo. its nt a matter of whether its common or nt or wat, just tat they are still so young lo..if can fend for themselves, they dun nd us ard liao lo...

huh? wat u scare ur gal with???

 


Val

Aiya u knw my mil has not been really treating me v gd ever since I preg. Always wan control me. Last time I still green so I listen to her ESP 1st time mom ma. N she even scolded me wen m preggy tat time. So I believe my boy inside my tum can hear lor. And when I suffered in silence, I talked to my boy in tummy tat we must b strong n dun let her look down on us. When the day I fell out wz her cos I dun listened to her & refused to be under her claws anymore, she started bad mouth me like I was a witch. My boy nvr hv chance to go near her cos I hv less ctc wz her since we bey gum Liao. Honestly, she had made my life v miserable & like living hell since we fell out n even now also make me pai seh by gg to his cc. I really hate her so much lor

 
Auroa

I think as long as yr mil didn't push her luck too far towards u, u can still gv her a bit of face for yr Hubby sake. For me, she had done too much bad to me until my fil whom supposed to b on her side, took him a year (he also joined forces wz mil to bully me previously) to realize the truth tat she had been self directing all the gossips abt me. Tats y I can't forgive n forget wat she done.



True, can't stop them fr visiting him. I didn't too but my boy knows how they treat me, somehow. ESP my mil, he can tell me, he does not like her. I dunno why leh but I suspect cos he can feel tat my mil is not sincere to him even when she Kay siao try to see him in cc.

 
val, recently she starts to scatch her arm till it bleed... then it's quite dry and itchy so i put moisturers for her but she still scatch it till bleeding... so i reminded her the boy badly burnt ops show and tell her that if she continues to scatch, her skin will be "spolit" and turn black then no choice hve to ask doc to "peel it off" and use her inner thighs skin to "put it back" and i told her never mind keep scatching.. pain pain for a while only.... she quickly cried and said "dun want".. at nite keep on repeating "mummy, dun want... i'm scared".. haiz... btw, after her viral fever this year, her skin starts to be very dry around the back of her neck, arms and legs... changed moisturers for her still dun help.. any1 got good recommendation?

 
vv, i used to chat and friend friend with my inlaws... even they come to my house and opened my drawers to see my personal stuff, i also kept quiet... but until my hubby went overseas to study and i tagged along that my sisters emailed me that she bothers them with phone calls almost everyday... my mil loves to chat with my younger sis (my younger sis can chat with every1 esp senior pp).. she starts to tell why i so different compared to her... the last straw comes, she went and visited my younger sis when she delivered her son and commented that her dil never lay eggs... right in front of my sis mil.. later my mum got to hear of it and called me in states and asked me why i still dun hve child despite married for 5 yrs liao... my mum so upset to see her daughter being said in such ways... that's the last straw liao... can mess with me but dun mess w my family... later i found out that my mil went ard the neighbourhood to comment that i dun want her to do confinement bcos i dun like her cooking and also her thumb "rotten" that i scared... i never comment that and she put words into my mouth till my neighbours told me abt it... no wonder i find that some of my neighbours (esp those senior pp) dun talk to me... she bo pai seh, i also pai seh... made me wants to move out of this area but hubby refused to move... haiz...

 
vv,

so ur boy must have felt everything thus nw he bo hiew ur mil =P

anyway, since nw dun talk so much le then ok lo, dun be bothered by her or wat she says..dun make ur own life miserable coz of her =)



auroa,

hmmm...mayb i sld use this method of urs on my boy...coz he like to peel the corner of his finger nail esp ard the skin...tell him many times he dun listen...



hmm..i dun apply moisturer for my boy except for J&J and only when his skin is dry or when we are overseas wo...



mayb u try aloe vera cream???

 
val, i tried aloe vera gel but not cream... which type of cream har?

 
auroa, i think may be ezcema that your girl is suffering from. try and moisturise her as best as u can. and if the scratching get worst, bring her to a skin doc.

 
Val - My girl started with GUG, Shichida when she was 8-9mths old..gradually we switched her to ICR, CMA, Berries when she is older, and add on ballet & swimming for physical enhancement. So far she enjoys all classes.

As for ICR, u can check with rach(mummytan) she is with ICR and I see her weekly when send my girl to class [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] She might be able to guide u along.

 
starfruit, hve bought her to see doc previously and checked but hor, family doc said that's skin irritation and PD said that it's ezcema... dun knwo who to believe...

 
Auroa - u can try using CB calendula cream see it helps. Actually the spray sometimes help too. Aloe vera is mild..might not help but just sooth the skin.

 
apple, where can buy the CB (erh, what does it stands for?) calendula cream? all pharmacy got sell?



btw, i just "scared" my girl .. she just woke up from her nap and went straight to the TV and at the same time trying to peep at me to see my reaction... i suddenly "talk" and asked her what is she doing and immediately she jumped and cried that she wants TV... told her that can but never ask, answer is "NO".. and she wailed... i told her can watch but must go and drink water and she's hugging her water bottle and drinking now...

 
Auroa

Haz... can see u also suffered the "same fate" as me. So sian right? Dunno why they like tat hor. Yr mIL same like mine too, like to cook up stories and act so pitiful in front of her relatives. I really dun like it lor. And make things worse, try to act in front of my hubby. Can u imagine? She didnt even ack me when I call her i.e. Mother very loudly cos I purposely want the whole world to know I still call her even though we officially dun talk & fell out liao. She didnt even look at me at all! And then after that knowing Im preg nw, told hubby say she can come cook for me la, and say dun get back the old CL. My hubby tu her back nicely say, I will get catered food instead. I mean pls loh, I am really thankful if she can just leave me alone.



Aiyo, your MIL makes things quite bad for u leh. My neighbours also know my MIL ma. And they all thk Im the evil DIL also lo. Now I dun care anymore. For a moment, I also want to move this area out ASAP. But hubby said, no point. Cos cant change the fact they are his parents. Well, suan le lor. Now I just hope she go lesser to my boy cc to ma lu me in front of the teachers.



Val

Yap. She purposely make my life miserable. I know de, cos she alrdy done so much things behind my back liao. And yet purposely let me know. U see. Haz. Now like I say, I hope she dun come disturb me after #2. And dun ever come my hse when #2 looked after by my maid (while am working). She is fond of doing that last time during my #1 and started asking maid What I prepare for #1 food la, blah blah la, then turn around tell my maid to do otherwise, against my instructions.

 
Auroa - It is California Baby calendula cream. U can grab from Watson if urgent, otherwise buy fr spree it is cheaper. My girl has sensitive skin, so this cream works well on her and the spritzer spray so when we are out, I see her got skin irritation, I will spray her imeediately. It comes the skin.

Hmm..if PD told u eczema, I think is eczema bah.

 
Auroa, CB = California Baby.

Hey i meantioned ezcema cos stratching till bleeding is a possible sign. Keep him moisturised and skin hydrated.

u can get some tips here. http://www.babycenter.com/0_eczema_10872.bc

For CB products, if u need it urgently, guardian pharmacy sells, However if u can wait, go to the BP here, its much cheaper to get from the states.

 
auroa, thanks. I hope he will get better when he grows older, there are some improvement in his behaviour after his 4th BD this yr but somehow it got worse again after a few months. I will be going for a course in KK soon to understand how to handle problematic child. Hope it helps.

 
melody110, I just send my boy for fingerprint/DHA analysis and it helps us understand him better, know his strength/weaknesses/talent. But I dunno how to explain the result cause I did not attend the workshop. My hubby knows better..and he knows my boy need soft approach instead of me always scared him with cane.

 
melody, r u sure he is considered problematic. there must be some root cause and why he bahaves this way. u were saying that your IL or parents gives in to him a lot?

 
vv, ya, dun know why they treat us like that.. imagine if their daughters being treated in such way by their inlaws, they sure burst... last yr, mil called up my hubby and asked him (actually sort of confront him) whether he dun want them anymore and wants my hubby to tell them so... my hubby so sad and quarrel with his mum... think after that incident, my hubby sided with his family and dun want to hear me say anything bad abt them.. he will hve "big reaction" if i comment/say anything abt them.. so i dun comment/say anything in front of my hubby liao..



apple/starfruit, thanks... will check it out in watsons store 2morrow...

 
melody, i normally stay in close contact with my girl's teachers.... if i detect anything albnnormal, i will let her teacher knows and she will look out for her and will feedback why such behaviours results and suggestion on what to do.. her previous teacher is very good and monitor my girl very closely.. for instance, she misbehaves very badly in public and behaves well at home/school... after her teacher observes, she askes me what i will do when she misbehaves.. i replied i smacked her and daddy also smacked her lor.. she said cannot.. 1 hve to "good" and the other "bad"... if both are "bad", she feels that whatever she does, she still gets the "smacking", she will mishbehves and rebel even more.. so we adapt different approach and sure it improves alot...



for the current cc teachers, they are pretty new to me and slowly we are building a rapport and the form teacher will gets information from me why my girl misbehaves in school and i will tell her how to counter attack it.. hehehee.. personally feel got to work together since we are all for her own good...

 
dolly, agree.. my mil told me straight in the face that if i dun know how to speak cantonese, will not be considered family... my sil heard it and tell her off and she kept quiet... if my sil's mil tells her that, my mil sure hit the rooftop...

 
so far now, me and my MIL still ok. but i hope she dun go ki siao and mad when i deliver, cos my hubby is the only son and die, i also need to stay with her. sigh.....

 
Wayne, I also know that my boy need soft approach but I got no paitent so usually I end up scaring him with the cane too. But I will smack him when he gets too aggressive.



Starfruit, My boy is rather aggressive, he demands a lot of things and want us to give in if we dun he will throw tantrum and turn aggressive like kick, beat or scratch us. My hubby, me and my parents arms have a few scratch marks. very stressful loh. So we bought him to KK child development unit. My mum give in a lot to him becos she dun wan my son to cry too much in the house becos my dad dun like it. If give in to my son, he won't get mad and start the drama loh.



Auroa, his school teacher got complaint abt him a few times but recently seems ok. We also know abt one parent to be "good" the other be "bad". I am the "bad" one usually. However, it is so difficult to maintain this at times, my hubby is a paitent guy but at times my boy drives him so crazy that he also lost control and had to smack him. I think we need expert's advise on how to handle him, hope the course I am going will give me some help.

 
morning mummies..



yes dolly!! TGIF!!!!! cant wait for the weekend.. i want to sleep the whole day!! heheheh



melody, does naughty corner works for him? and how does he react if u hit/smack him? maybe he needs a soft approach. i think must try all methods to see which one works best for him.

 
melody, I am also the bad guy in the family, will scold and smack him, cane will be if he really naughty...but hor cane he also not pain, never cry one..think the skin dead liao..hubby will use the soft approach after i finish all the scolding..usually it works for him.



There is once, I lifted my butt off my stool to get some food, and when I was about to sit down, he take off my chair, I almost fell with my big tummy..made super angry..what happen if I really fell and something happen to the baby..so i cane him a few strokes..he never cry also..made me even more angry..later hubby ask him why he do that..he say he want to change chair with me.



Naughty corner works for him when he is 2yrs old, now no more...but now he can listen better..and I try not to cane him until he made me really very angry.

 
Morning mummes!!



Yeah, later I half day go watch movies and shopping!!!



Hope everyone enjoy your weekend.



Early in the morning, haven say hello start saying bad things about my boy liao..keke

 
dolly..I know..everyone told me he eat soft dun eat har..but hor the things you do really made you vomit blood one..until he ask the behind reason why he did that.



Now he like to stack stools, climb up and open the cabinet to take snacks himself...and when I ask him how come never ask mummy's permission..he told me because the answer is always no so he might as well open and take himself...faint!!

 
starfruit, it's me who asked abt the cheese dips.. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



wayne, think he get used to the smacking till he "feel no pain". I used to sent my girl to the naughty corner... at first it works but after some time, she saw me angry, she will ran to the naughty corner and stay there till we call her over... she very smart and knows that she stands there and later we will call her over and she aplogies and hug and she will ran and play liao.. there was a time that i frequently smacked her hands and used ruler to smack her till she's scared and eventually when i smacked her hands, she "no feelings"... i also noticed that she starts to hve behaviour problems in school too.. i speaked w her form teacher & i think i might the root problem.. sat my girl down to talk and she told me that she dun like me to smack her and i promised that mummy will try not to lor... nowadays, i dun smack her in public but i will pre-warn her before we go out and what will be e consquences if she misbehaves... after coming home, i will smack her buttocks and explained to her... nowadays going out, she will behave properly (no screaming, stomping her feet to get what she wants, etc)... of course, there are times, she will do it and she will gets a warning... recently she starts getting mischief again and i sat her down and asked her why.. she said that she wants attention from mummy... i guess after pregnant, i haven been carrying her alot and refusing to carry her and seldom bring her out to the park to play swing... i told her mummy will try to play w her.... after that, she's ok liao... i guess as and when children gets into "moods swings" like adults do lor..

 
morning ladies. yaya! finally fri lo.



auroa,

hmmm..paisay i duno the brand of the aloe vera cream as it was my friend who recommended me but i nv try it before. =P

aiyo! ur mil v bad lo...so wat cant speak canto means nt family...v wu liao lo but lucky ur sil stands up for u. my hb's sis only 21..she dun gives my hb prob n keep thinking its right of her to ask my hb for $$ i be happy enuff.





apple,

its ok la coz i dun intend to sign him up for ICR anymore. I went to the branch nearer to my place and there is only 1 teacher for his level and I dun really like the teacher...





vv,

to be frank, i oso hope she dun go to my boy's sch n "disturb" him... but i guess she knows my pattern well enuff to mess ard with me.

my hb's sis is another headache one...





dolly,

u are right abt mil nv treats DIL the same as own daughter...



wayne_mummy,

hahaha. ur boy steady la hahaha. know u always say no so he may as well take it on his own...think better watch him and start to correct him before its too late esp when he goes pri/sec sch and starts mixing ard with other kids..if gd kids, then still ok...if bad kids then v cham lo.

 
Hannah...yes..his answer most of the time makes sense..but I told him he still has to ask as it is dangerous to climb the stool himself..my mum let him eat healthy snack everyday so he is happy now.



Auroa..ya, cane often will be numb..it happens to me when I was young. Everyone says my boy inherit my mischievous but my mum say my boy is worse than me. But hor my boy is very good in school, only misbehave at home and outside..no matter how I warn him before going out, he will forget and misbehave in public.



Now he like to sit in stroller..and when he want to go to a particular shop, he will use his leg to brake the stroller, dun let us push..insist to come down and go to the shop.



I remember there is once he kanna a severe caning from me and he dare not do it again..it etch in his heart and mind. But I think I will never do that again as it really frigtening him till he shiver. Told him many times cannot go near the prayer table and touch the things there and he refuse to listen. So while I was praying, he touched the vase again and the whole vase fell on him and I was quick enough to grab the vase..only water pour all over him and never hit his head..else I think the head will break..from then he never dare to touch anything in the prayer room.

 
wayne_mummy,

think as generations pass, the kids get smarter and smarter lo. i think our generation, we were more managable...and also we dun go sch so early.



kids nowadays are really ahead of us in many ways.

 
wayne / val : strongly agree... kids nowdays comes from another planet...



my mum brought my girl to watch hi-5 yesterday... she's so happy after the show...

 
dolly,

wah! ur mum so steady can manage ur gal on her own when outside? my mum dun dare to bring him out too far on her own...

heard the HI-5 show nt bad and it was really crowded when i was at MS last sun...



Re: ms

i am still having ms and its my 18th week..wonder if my ms is here to stay till i deliver =/

 
val : of coz not, my mum brought my maid along... ya, my mum told me it's quite crowded... then my poor girl's foot was been stepped by other kor kors & jie jies.... but she still enjoyed...

 
ash : my mum & maid went up to queue so they manage to go into the sitting area... that's why my girl's foot got stepped by other kiddos... then my mum claimed that she doesnt want to dance but keep clapping her hands... then for the rest of the day.. she so good mood...

 
wayne's mummy: Wow! What your mum did was really helpful then. To provide him with healthy snacks so that he can still satisfy this cravings without having to do "naughty stuff" to get to the snacks. =)

 
good morning mummies,



I am busy these few days and hardly got time to post here =P



Wayne, starfruit, my boy also dun cry when I cane him, skin is thicken already.. Naughty corner doesn't work already, he will shout and scream or struggle with me when I put him there. Now we try to set some rules for him when we go out and made him agree to them if he didn't follow we will go home. At home certain rules are also being set and we ensure he follows them so far so good. Meeting his unreasonable demand is still a challenge for us as we need to think and think how not to give in to him yet make it sound nice so that it doesn't trigger him.

 


val..



occassionally i am also having ms.. coming week 20 on sun.. also having the same thought as u..



re: hunger pangs



baby or mum is the one feeling the hunger? my mil insisted baby will nvr feel hungry.. its the mum..cos one of the night, i toast my food cos my baby is hungry.. next morning, tell my HB.. baby will nvr feel hungry.. he will eat wat his mum eat n she has preg b4 lor.. (we nvr communicate.. all its thru my HB)... in my mind, baby is the one hungry.. that y we eat more..wat stupid thinking n still dare to comment i also preg b4...



she dun even noe wat food can eat n cant eat.. that time we went JB eat seafood.. order stingray..i said i cant eat.. she said y cant eat..fish wat (it is how she talk to mi)...



everything said i picky on food.. went for family gathering.. finally his son talk back to her... always say we are picky on food.. my MIL dun even dare to eat guilin gao and honey.. all these are nutritious food and good for skin n throat... (no wonder she look so haggard)..



i always complain to my mum..other place i can complain is here... dun bother tell my HB.. he will side his mum...



all the while my mil love boy... even pray to god that she hope to have a boy.. (3 m/c).. suddenly on family gathering..said girl is better, close to mum.. (think bcos her son is snatched by mi bah)...

 
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