(2011/02) Feb 2011

@Jolin: Errrr.. Something like heart pumping but I can't feel it if I put my hand there. Then sometimes is like bubbles "exploding" in my tummy. Lol~ So I also don't know leh. I read the "What to expect" it says mild baby kick is like that. I think I have wait for firm kicks then only I can confirm. Lol~ It said should start feeling between week 18 to week 22. Maybe next week I'll ask my gynae. Hehehe.. Oh, It also said if baby is facing down when kicking we also can't feel. So maybe your baby did try to kick you but cos she's facing the other side, that's why you can't feel it. =)



Ya, my mil also getting master from Taiwan to select my baby's chinese name. My sil's 2 daughters also got their name through her. By giving her 生成八字 will do.

 


hi all mummies, i will be having my detailed scan tmr.. so nervous.. duno will be a prince or princess.. the most impt thing is as long as the baby is healthy.



wishchild, it not gd for a pregnant lady to diet leh. just eat more healthy food. avoid fried oily food. eat more fruits & veg.



i agreed with first mum on the nanny & infantcare part. my SIL send her 2nd baby to infantcare, it true the baby always get sick & one baby fall sick, the rest of the baby will kena. my sil baby also kanna brochalitis & was hospitalise for few days. so poor thing leh, only 2month old baby. somemore, baby immune system has not build up yet, so they tend to get it first if someome ard them is sick. & what happen if the baby is being mishandled by the infantcare care giver? the only thing baby does is cry. baby cant complaint to u tat they are being mishandle.



my mil is also those kind tat dun like to stay at home to take care of baby, she rather play MJ & furthermore, hers & FIL's personal hygiene fail tremendously. & my mum also dun hav the time. tat why i decided to quit my job after i used up the 4mth ML & stay at home & look after my gal previously until now. it better to look after ur own child yourself. less conflict with MIL or nanny & etc.

although it's tough, we just hav to manage our finances properly. now im preggy with 2nd one, not sure am i able to cope without any help after my confinment. from going thru labour to even during confinment, i also worried since i cant touched the water. who will bath & cook for my gal... housework, i can get those cleaning company like just relax company to come & clean once a week. i feel they are much cheaper than those $10 per hr part time cleaner. food can get tingkat after confinment period. haiz.. so many worries...

 
@valeria: Ya i can feel my bb kicking if i not wrong.. Coz i can feel something inside bouncing.. It like bb knockin my tummy lor.. Gt those "tot tot" feeling..



Valeria dont worry.. Diabetes during pregnancy wont coz it if u over eat don worry.. But u only need to worry if bb too bad cant go normal delivery.. Need to go C-section.. Have ur doc tel u whether u can go normal delivery or cesarean delivery??

 
Val, Wish_child,

Envy you all who manage to feel baby move already. Hm, don't know if it is my tummy skin or fat too thick, or i am too slow in react, i can't really feel anything except those streching and poking pain occasionally. Hm... really looking forward to feel my baby soon soon soon

 
Darlest - good luck in your detail scanning! Have fun too! I stil have to wait for 2 more weeks [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]



I still cannot differentiate bb kicking from other cramps or pain leh...

 
Hihi... me going for scan on wed... anyone has appt in TMC on wed?

anxious to know if i can buy pink or blue! i love sweet stuff and drinks now...make me feel good & comfortable... scare i overdose on sugar...=p

 
@darlest: So good!! Good luck for your scan!! =D I still have to wait till next Friday. Arghhh.. So long..... It's only Monday now! =(



@wish_child: She never tell me leh. She let me choose. Lol~



@Jolin: But I'm not sure if that's baby kick anot leh. And it's only when I'm lying down on bed then I have that feeling. If I'm seated I don't have that feeling leh.

 
val... hmmmm...diabetes even if u didnt gain much weight..if ur body fail to process the sugar or wat u also will get gestational diabetes one leh..not neccessary must be those who gain alot then will get...



i was induced at 10++am, baby come out at ard 5pm...so ard 7hours..ok leh..not a tough birth...



jolin...first time mummy hor... some dun feel it until later one.. just wait..hehe..soon u find ur girl girl kick u daily



darlest...wohooo...tml u can noe whether a prince or princess lor!! heheee...

hmmm...as to touching water..i did touch water for my #1... got help out in washing bottles and normal laundry using washing machine..

if u not so strict type..can touch lar...we also need to wash hand after toilet mah..and not forgetting clean up before bf...

 
Hi Darlest-> Hmm but i love to eat tibits n fries.. Hmm trying hard to cut down.. But i eat fruit n vege everyday..



I still thought of let my bb go infantcare when she 1yrs 3mths old so i can go out to work.. Darlest i face the same case as u.. My MIL rather play MJ n she complain my house is too far.. Coz she stay at jurong n i stay at sengkang n she only will take care my bb for few days if i wanna go oversea wif my hubby. My mom super not free, she rather work than take care bb.. Haiz i also have lot of worries i'm afraid my hubby dont have so much money to support the house, me, bb n car.. Somemore he also dont earn much too.. Hmm feel stress when think abt it..

 
sigh.... seems like some of us here don't really have support from family (mother/MIL), no choice have to depend on ourselves, since it is our BB, we have to be responsible lor...

i want to stay at home and play with my BB..... [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

my hubby told me to search for homebased job, think so easy meh?....

 
Val,

I think more or less, the feeling that you feel is baby kicking lah. Mine is just those normaly streching pain which i felt during first trimester.



Choc,

Ya, i was told that some first time mummies only feel their baby move until 3rd trimester. I hope i don't have to wait for so long leh [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]



Darlest and Rachel,

Good luck on your coming scan. Tell baby to cooperate and pose nice nice. Hope you are able to find out the gender during the scan ya

 
on weight gain - seems like many of the mummies here still hv it under control! sigh, i already gained 5 extra kg at 17 wks.. but my colleague says it's fine cos i was underweight previously.. hope she's right!



on baby kicks - i THINK i have been starting to get them since last wk, which was 18wks.. not quite sure until last Sat when he seemed be be bobbing around, i asked my hubby to observe and we were staring intently for a minute on so and suddenly there was this jerkish movement on my belly.. think he may have been reacting to the piece of champagne mooncake that i had?!





princess31 - i think ur mum's advice is gd.. that we have to keep tweaking our arrangment till we find something suitable! My secret ambition is to be a SAHM but that's non-negotiable territory with my hubby, so i just to learn how to juggle work with baby.. i'm like a super-slacker and can't multitask and need lots of sleep.. so crossing my fingers that i can cope!! so i guess, while we work through our options, we try not to get too stressed up by this?

 
Neongoby,

Me too, will stay at home to take care of BB after she is born, cos no one can help. For finance wise, i will need to work out with hubby. Will definetely be tight since it will become single income, but for the baby, it think it will worth. Hope can work part time or home based job by that time.

 
@Jolin--> Dont worry soon u will feel ur bb kicking u.. Normally they say 5mths later bb kick will be more strong.. Ur bb very gentle maybe she kickin u gently but u cant feel.. My bb girl too rough like me that why she kick me i can feel.. But her kick is not that strong that can feel pain.. Maybe u can try eat sweet so ur bb will be active n start kick u more..



@rachel: Let me guess.. Ur bb shld be a boy.. Hmm i seen a lot of my preggy frens love to eat sweet stuff gt bb boy..

 
Wish_child,

Thanks, thanks. Hope it's like what you said, i don't feel it cos my baby girl is gentle, haha..

I actually said the same thing to my hubby, that maybe baby like me, gentle and quite but he immediately gave me the very "skeptical" look and said, huh, you, gentle meh? Hahaha...

 
Zanta,



That's the mandantory medical check up expenses. If the maid falls sick, you have to pay his medical expenses too, and worst still if the maid needs some sort of surgery you also have to pay for the hospitalization bills which can be exorbitant. Of course that will be the worst case scenario

 
@Neongoby: It difficult to find home base job.. I also wan if have.. I now already start lookin for home base job.. But some is con ppls 1.. Hmm look like lot of mommies here giving up their job becoz of our precious one..



@kinderbueno: SO cute ur bb.. U can even c ur bb movement i cant c it lor.. Oh can eat champagne mooncake?? My sis bought it for the family but it contain champagne so i didnt took it.. But i wan to try.. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 
kinderbueno - my secret ambition is also to be a SAHM but a rich one! lol, then me and my hubby don't have to worry abt finance at all, hahaha....



Jolin - good for u that you can stay at home, at least ur hubby is agreeable...



I guess i hv to look for a home based job first b4 i can convince my hubby.

 
Neongoby,

It's not a permanent arrangement. I will go back to work when baby is older (maybe 2 years old like that bah). Me and my hubby lead very simple life, never splunge on any expensive items. So, if we work out carefully, should be able to manage lah and yes, thank God that my hubby is supportive

 
wish child...haha oh no i have 2 boys already... am hoping this is a girl... lol... but am fine if is boy again... =p



I tink is better to train and have a maid to look after baby... i had my maid since my #1. She was totally new and i train her in everything in taking care of baby...till date with me for 3 years already. my parents/ in laws cannot take care and dunno how to take care. They will only spoil the kids. Infant care is expensive, and they tend to do nothing but carry the baby. Baby who grow up at hm can learn to be more independent coz maid will do housework,etc. And home is safer and cleaner. If you are working, dun need to go through the hassle of going and leaving work early on time just to fetch the baby...



Of coz cross finger on good luck to find a good maid thou...So long the maid loves the kid and you are clear on house rules, then should be ok...

 
neongoby, i think its hard to find home based jobs geniune ones... thats why many mummy start their own business selling kids stuff etc in blogstores. i wish i had that talent for business

 
neongoby - hahah.. well said!! we must aspire to be rich SAHM.. home-based assignments are a good idea.. let me know if u find a good lobang! Actually sometimes i think it's a matter of expectations in life.. some families can survive on single income, couple of thousands a mth.. but i guess we are too spoilt liao, like to eat out, buy nice stuff.. plus i very kiasu, want to send my kid to enrichment classes and good pre-school.. so must really save up when i can..



wish_child - err.. i think if u can tahan, then better dun try the champagne mooncake lah.. we are not supposed to take alcohol after all.. I tried cos my friend said the alcohol not strong at all, but in the end i think it was quite strong lor.. just hope that tiny piece i took won't harm the baby..though he seemed quite active after that.. hope he wasn't drunk??!



btw, i read some posts that some mummies know the weight of their babies during the scan.. how does the gynae tell?? the machines so high tech? i didn't hear anything from my gynae leh..

 
@Darlest: Huh. Why your sil so soon sent her baby to infant care? She don't have 4 months maternity leave?



@choc: Hmm.. Then I don't know why she keep asking me to control my weight liao. Haha! But I didn't eat a lot of extra things leh. Normal 3 meals and bread/biscuits in between. Once in a while french fries & chicken wings (hee hee hee). But at least I don't every night eat supper already.. Though I'm hungry lah. Last night 10 plus my hubby cooked maggi mee. Then when he brought into the room I commented "Woah, smell so good... But I don't want to eat.". And he asked me why. Cos usually when I smell his food I'll eat his.



@neongoby: My friend became a SAHM after she gave birth to her girl. Then after a while she started doing her own business on making diaper cakes. So smart lor. Envy her. But anyway if she don't work also can lah. Her hubby is Singapore Team's goalkeeper. Lol~

 
darlest: tmr i also having my details scan @ TMC where urs? i also feel very nervous cos i hoping for a gal, last wk i went for my normal check up scan and gynae dun wan to confirm with me is it a gal he just only say maybe is a gal.

 
jolin : for my 1st pregnancy, i only feel the baby kick when im abt 5mth plus, tat time i was holiday in brisband, lying on the hotel bed. haha.. when i feel tat kick tat time, i was thinking, oh my, wat was tat? when my baby kick me the third time, then i realise it the baby kick me. haha..



hee.. thanxs Neongoby, val & jolin. val, im sure, it will be ur turn very soon for the detailed scan. =)



choc, ya hor! u are right! during my 1st confinment, i also use water to wash my face & clean the wound "below". but when come to bathing my gal, i can get wet from my hand, legs & body one coz my gal hate to wash her hair, she alway struggle when washing her hair... so in the end, i will get all wet....

and come to think of it, i can still cook her food! hee.. yippe, one problem solve! thanxs choc!



wishchild, it better to cut down all the oil & fried food. even if eating tibits or snack, also must eat healthy one like pretzel, apple, yogurt etc. jia you, u can do it!(n_n)V

sorry wishchild, it seem tat im making u worried too. so sorry. at first, am quite worried abt our finances when i decide to be SAHM. u just have to work out the finances with ur hubby.

let jia you & stay positive k.

 
Darlest & Rachel: All the best with your upcoming scans! I hope all is well with your babies [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] Rachel - I might be doing mine on Wed @ TMC ... prob morning..waiting to seee if my hub has any meetings that morning or not, then can accompany me. Mine's actually scheduled for Sat but if I can, I wanna avoid TMC on Sats when it's a madhouse.



Darlest, wishchild, kinderbueno, neongoby: I also wanna be SAHM [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif] But my hubby is v concerned about single income families. I think it's coz he has quite big spending habits and he may not be able to give up his expensive hobbies. Sigh! He also told me to look for home-based jobs rather than quitting working altogether. But in S'pore, looks like not much opening for home-based jobs, unless you have some skill which allows you to work as freelancer? eg. designer . Not me [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]



Jolin, Neongoby: I still can't feel bb's movement either! And I told my gynae quite frankly, I'm not sure I can identify it when it happens. She said it's like butterflies in the stomach. Huh ?? >.<



Kinderbueno: I'm v similar to you in that I'm also super-slack, cannot multi-task, must sleep alot, haahaa....! I'm much better now than during student days coz working life forces you to wake up early, sleep late, and maximise your time during the day, but I know my natural state is one of a daydreamer who likes the slow pace of life and the simple things [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] Like bringing up baby! I'm not the ambitious type although I have been brought up in that type of environment ... my bro, my hub all super career-minded type, and my parents spent alot on my education and put me in good schools, but some times your innate personality is as such. I don't think I'm lazy, but I just need the right motivation to get going. My hub keeps telling me must work coz got money!! But it doesn't motivate me the way it motivates him. Maybe I need to be more realistic and look at the big bills every month then that will "scare" me into action :p

 
Darlest, No la don worry. I'm ok i also thinking of saving money for my bb n also wanna spend most of the time wif her n take gd care of her.. Haha ya i will try eat healthy food n time for me to shop for healthy food.. whahaha.. Ya i will jia you.. =)

All the mommies here also must jia you n stay postive in order to have a happy bb..

 
elise, mine used to be at tmc, but recently i switch to kk tps. wow, if it a gal, u get wat u wish for! hee.. gd gd!

duno mine is it a boy, coz i hav a princess. hee..



val, my sil has the 4mth ML , but she only used up 2mth coz her company need her to go back to work early, so the rest of her ML, she spread & use it when necessary.

 
Omg. Next door is cooking dinner again. Smells so good!! Arghh.. I smell fried chicken wing! Hmmmmm... Maybe later I buy some home. Or should I buy french fries? LOL~

 
@pinkyval – He will take u for granted if things continue like tat! I have a friend who’ll do everything’s for her bf /hubby. He took her for granted and sorry to say that he treating her like maid! Sometimes, it’s like we owe the other party de so like we paying the debts now. So I always believe treating each other nice or same. It always right and pays to be nice to others (best if the person reciprocate) If not, just treat it as u doing a good deed. Just hope one day ur hubby will realize how fortunate he has you as his wife.



No bb kicks yet I think mine is a quiet bb coz in every scan, bb dun move much.



@choc- hope can keep to 10kgs the max lah but who knows I might gain more than tat L coz now I believe my wt has shot up le…



@darlest – Keep up update and good luck in your scan! Your MIL sounds like my mum haha!

 
@pyng: Ya, last time I always find that he takes me for granted and not appreciative of the things I did for him. There was once I gave him a surprise for his birthday but things went so wrong and he didn't like it lor. I brought him to Lawry though I don't eat beef but I thought he might like the steak there and he showed an unhappy face cos he said he don't like western food. But after eating then he said very delicious and he was happy. But by then I already upset lor. And when he didn't like the present that I bought for him he'll say it straight to my face. I was so disappointed! That was the first and last time I planned his birthday for him. Last year we had a very big fight and I told him all the unhappiness that I have in my heart. Well at least he kept that in mind and I can say he's a lot better to me. But I don't think I'll give him anymore surprises cos he doesn't seem to like the surprises that I gave him. Hmm...

 
Mami B

I totally agree with u on the impt of routine. Im also a Gina ford follower and it has been my faithful guide since I gave birth to my firstborn. When I was expecting my 2nd one I worry he will disrupt my elder girl's routine,but I worked v hard at training him to fall instep with the first,and they now nap n sleep at same tm, mealtimes one after the other. Makes my job v much easier and I can rest from 1 to 330 everyday. They also slept thru fr a young age. So I totally agree that a strict routine is v impt for the caretaker to stay sane.



Zanta/ darlest

yes to have a well trained maid is a life saviour. Besides I can't imagine after a long day, coming home to more housework!



Rachel

are u shm or ftwm? Will your maid be able to handle 3 kids in time to come? How old are your 2 boys if u don't mind me asking.

 
some have no help, some have too much help. :p

I have dilemma between MIL and my mom for confinement.. might just end up getting a CL, or DIY with some help from the moms. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 
princess, mine is wed morning 10am. maybe can catch you there...



First mom, i ftwm.

my boys are 3+ and 2+. Maid can handle since they are babies coz i taught her how to manage by giving her some scenarios...now my 2 boys can entertain each other. She will get the hang of it after awhile...This year both are in childcare so my maid actually quite free and do household chores. She can take care of them just that doesn't actually know how to discipline them. So if im at home, im the bad guy aka discipline mistress. Kids are v smart. They actually know who they can mess with...



Back then, the dilemma you gals are going through now i had it too. but after much though and calculation, maid is the best choice if both u & hub are working.

 
i rather MILs be unhelpful, than to interfere in all the wrong ways just by using mouth, poking noses and no real action.

 
pyng : sure , i will. haha is it... who know maybe ur mum & my mil is MJ kakis.. kekeke..



mami B & first mum : i also agreed on the impt of routine too! i stick to my gal routine very strictly too. now also worried my #2 will distrupt my #1 routine. think i shall go check out the gina ford book.

 
Rachel

I c. Since they r in CC then it's no prob when no.3 comes I suppose. And they r both of a "manageable" age and like u said,they can entertain each other. I admire you for being able to hold on to your job and have 3 kids. It's really not easy being a working mother....



Pootz

ure one lucky gal! I wish I was in your shoes. But doing confinement with mum/ mil can b tricky. Must tread carefully...

 
unhelpful mil

first mum, same as rachel. i rather mil to be unhelpful, than to interfere in all the wrong ways, nose poking etc. when tat happen, quarrel between dil & mil will occured.

 
it seem like most of the mtb here, dun mind to be a SAHM. =)

not alot lady willing to stay at home & look after their child. most of them say they will turn crazy if they are a SAHM. haha

 
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First Mum - as you say.. have to thread carefully lor... as a first-time mother, I may not doing the right thing, I forsee lots of flying short-temper as well. Sigh...



Darlest - yes, think I'll go crazy if I stay at home... but I guess perspective might change when the time comes. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] I can only keep an open-mind now...

 
Rachel, really take my hat off u for having a third child!!!

I would love to but am so afraid of the pregnancy process again. Have to decide after this baby comes out.



First mum, great to hear that u are a fellow Gina Ford follower! My Mil was not so sure it's a good method initially and tried to interfere with my feeding schedules, to her, if baby cry=hungry, nothing else. Now, seeing how my boy sleeps thru well at night n eats well, she is less adverse when I mentioned that the new baby will be going thru a schedule as well. [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]



darlest, do get the book and check it out to see if u agree with her methods. I found it enlightening. We never had to overpack when we go out coz we are so sure how much milk we need based on the time we intend to spend outside [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif]

 
Pootz, agreed. I never had a single argument with my MIL before baby came a long. But within two months of arrival of baby, we had so many disagreements as I was staying with her for confinement, even my FIL had to mediate and I opted to move back home. Things got so bad she cried, I cried, I had to apologise etc. Then less problems. I listen to what moms have to say then when I go home, I can do what I feel is best for baby.

That's why this time, I think I will stay home for confinement [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] take care of baby myself.

 
Mami haha this is unplanned for! And with protection really dunno how it happened..haha.. i actually have a 2yr plan with just started on new business and intent to buy a house... so now quite stress oso coz im not on my top condition to work hard.. feeling tired and abit lazy at times... having a 3rd one will strain finances on the long run, we gonna be careful with our spendings...



stories with mil i had heaps. nightmare when i give birth to #1 and staying with the in laws. very inconsiderate like staring at me/ boobs when breastfeeding...when bb cry they have to join in the noise by saying this saying that as if i'm torturing the bb... yet all r just kpo-ing and no help at all, argue with my confinement nanny, etc...

 
Rachel, LOL...! Your situation is so similar to my girlfren =) Also unplanned third one. she was so shocked! but now happi coz she getting a gal finally (first two were boys).



I think with MIL/Mom, its always the same story. most of the time, its out of love and concern that they interfere but they don't realise all roads lead to rome and their method may not be the best way. I also try to remind myself that conversely, I should also review their advice and then make a choice on how i wish to proceed with baby.



the worst thing is when we trying to breastfeed then people around us keep saying things like,"you not enough milk lah" or "your baby still hungry lei..." or " think you better give formula lah" I do get boiling mad when i hear all these comments....grrr..

 
BF-ing

mami B, those comments u mention above, i did keep hearing it from my hubby & MIL leh. coz no matter how much i latch on or pump, my breast milk always less than 20ml each or lesser. so every time i pump out & store the milk in the fridge, the moment, mil saw the breast milk , she will always make those comments.. until i learn from my gal's Pd to take Fenugreek capsules from GNC, but still it only increase to 100ml each side & it ONLY happen to me JUST one time, the rest of time, it always 20-30ml or even lesser. it quite depressing. but however, i still continue (praying tat my breast milk will increase)the Fenugreek capsules until i decide to stop bf, tat time my gal is abt 9mth old liao when i decide to stop bf.

so meanwhile, i was half giving formula & breast milk since not enough. whenever, i mention this to my sis, she will also boiling mad coz she very supportive in bf-ing & she succeed in bf =)

 
@First mum: My mom ask me let my mil take care my bb since my mil is not working. I no choice that my mil don't want take care my bb Somemore i having a bb girl so no power. Hmpft. My mil very tradition person n she always insist her way. So it also very stress if she take care my bb. She confirm insist by her way n don't listen to what I say. What i can do is shut up but I felt it very difficult for me to do that. N I also afraid if i went out to work my mil last min tell me she don't wan take care my bb how?? Wow by tat time I will go crazy lor. So must as well I take care my princess myself.

My mom will help me do my confinement so I can save money for CL. My mom insist to do it for me becoz she say this my 1st child n no matter what must take care my body properly. I also feel more comfortable to stay at my home then at mil house.



@Darlest: u seeing which doc in tps? I seeing dr lee in tps but I changing to parkway east. Hmm did u did the FTS scan at kkh?

 


Hi mummies, saw many posts on nannies and childcare options..



I was SAHM for 11 months and now my boy is with nanny.

nanny cost is abt $650 +/- per month for daycare, ie not staying overnight.

and they dont work on PH, sat & sun.



Personally, I feel that being a SAHM is definitely the best choice for caring for a BB..

we can bond with BB and concentrate on BFg which is very impt for BB

we can always return to work force after we wean BB..

 
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