(2010/07) July 2010 MTB

keropi: yap! IFC no aircon. It's United Montessori @ Bishan St 12. I didn't know it's a MCYS rule, maybe I go read up. =P I think there's pros and cons about no aircon. Pros = good ventilation. Cons = may get quite hot.



Sleeping at night:

My girl is almost 3 months and she hardly sleep through the night [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif] she can feed 2 times a night somemore. If i put her down in her cot she will eh eh eh for 10 mins if I still dun feed she will CRY!! *sigh* no wonder she's so chubby... and i'm getting skinner just by carrying her. :p good workout man.

 


Ann>> Avent has glow-in-the dark pacifiers. haha! happened to me, too - couldn't find the pacifier at night and didn't want to wake baby up, so kept sweeping the cot with my hand



AK>> you're so right about our moms helping us out. i'm very, very thankful that my mom is willing to resign from her job and come down to help me take care of my baby



yesterday nite i watched "Saving Baby" on the Australian Network - all real life stories on babies who need to undergo life-saving operations, most of them have to do it the moment they are born! there's one baby born with fluid in her brain and they actually filmed the surgeon poking a needle into her head to drain the fluid. there's also a baby born with the liver outside her body. i watched also i felt heartpain, to see them having to go thru such pain, tubes all over their bodies. makes me so thankful that my baby is complete, in every part, in every way...

 
Sleeping through night: my boy can sleep from 10pm+ to 7am+ however he will en en en at 3am+ & 5am+.. I will give him his pacifier & pat pat him for awhile then he will go back to Zzzz... sometime got to carry him for awhile lah..



I'm also not sure whether he is train or he naturally sleep through... however I wanted him to sleep from 10pm to 7am therefore I will adjust all his milk time just to make sure he will drink on 9-10pm+ & 6-7am+ (this 2 timing must definately be his milk time) & from there This is how i do it: -



He used to wake up:

1am, 4am then 7am for milk



9/10pm+ feed - I will feed him liao, change his diaper (try to make this the last time for diaper change) then let him sleep with light off...



1am - i will give him his full intake (dreamfeed him, after he finish his milk i will carry him upright for awhile before i put him back so that he wouldn't vomit/spit out milk)



4am - I will cut down his intake gradually (for eg: his full intake is 100ml then for this feed I will only give 80ml for few days then slowly reduce accordingly by monitoring his next feeding time) I can't remember exactly for how long maybe ard 1-2weeks then got 1 night when he cry at 3am+ we still thought he wanted milk but when we gave him, he cry even louder then i just give him his pacifier & pat pat him then he go back to Zzz liao.... & from that day on he drop his 3-4am feed... after he drop his 3-4am feed - I start working on his 1am feed - I try moving his 1am feed to 12am then using the same method.. then there's one day he super tired - after his 9pm+ feed - he sleep till 6am+ & from that day...it become his routine liao...



hope this info can help some of u...

 
quartzie>> you're not alone in thinking that way - i also think like that, like i'm not doing my job as a mother. at one point, when my baby cried and i carried her, she wouldn't stop carrying. when my mom carried her, she'd stop. i was sooo sad [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif] but now she's starting to recognise that i'm her mom - keeps looking at me even when my mom is right in front of her and her eyes will follow me when i move away [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/happy.gif] so, it's just a phase they're going thru - jia you all mommies ya. dun despair



AK>> you're not a bad mommy, stop beating yourself up, ya. remember how careful you were with your diet when you were carrying her, so that she'd get all the nutrients, also the pains you went thru giving birth to her, your anxiety and worries when she regurgitated milk? if you're a bad mommy, you wouldn't have cared. give yourself a pat on the back. being a mother is not easy. i hope she'll overcome her reflux soon

 
thanks for all the encouragement! I will continue to jia you!



Seems like all the mummies are working very hard! although I ve my mum to help but I do feel perpetually tired .The only consolation is I ve lost all the weight which I gained during pregnancy. But my figure also lost liao la. Looking at my gal.. it is all worth it...

 
ica: Ya lo. I think of buying the glow in the dark one but then dunno worth or not. Later glow in the dark also cannot see cos baby hide it under him. Haha!!



Moreover I only need one pc.. anyone wanna share? Haha!! I saw them selling BP section.

 
Jastine - Actually I also prefer non-aircon environment... but that's what the in-chg told me plus the centre is very convenient for me then I just put him there... cos I feel non-aircon will have good ventilation as u mention then bb wouldn't get sick so easily compare to aircon environment... now just hope that BM can work wonder cos many ppl say Bfing bb is more healthy... better immune system

 
Claudia, Charliebrown,

For my boy, for the past few nites when he wake up at 3+~4am, i gave him pacificer and he went back to sleep. If he is really hungry, not matter what i do, ie pacificer, pat him or rock him, he would still cry. So when i gave him pacificer and he quiet down, i concluded that he is not hungry, but used to wake up at that timing for feed, thus i just be patient and give him pacificer. The problem is, he still doesnt really know how to suck his pacificer properly. I need to hold it for him till he fall asleep and that could take abt 15mins to half hr. Then for last night, he only woke up at abt 545am to cry for milk. Last feed was at 1130pm. Not sure if this situation would last or not (hopefully it will!) Will need to monitor for a few nights more and hopefully his timing can drag even longer.

 
Ann - emmm i also experience similar case when i cant find the pacifier...but by buying glow in the dark pacifier doesn't seem like a good solution to me... as the pacifier will be very near to bb - emmm wondering will it affect their eye???

 
Rgd "lost" pacifier,

How abt using the pacificer clip and clip it to your bb? Cos for glow in the dark to work, it need to absorb light first? So i think it will only glow for a while? Cos that time when i bought those glow in the dark stars, after a while it wont glow le.

 
keropi,

i dun think the glow is bright enough to harm baby's eyes. anyway, i'm thinking of weaning my baby off hers

 
Glow in the dark pacifier: I dun think it will spoil BB's eyes. I also dun think it will glow for long. Anyway, if BB hide it under his chin or body or butt, no matter how it glows, I will still not be able to see it till I pick baby up. Haha!! So don't think I will buy it.



I have pacifier clip but never clip on to him at night.. maybe I can try that method.



My BB only take pacifier when he sleeps but then sometime he also dun need pacifier also can sleep.

 
maybe i think too much...cos sometimes the pacifier will fall right beside him... as he like to Zzzz by his side... I just dun feel good to have something glowing so near his eyes.. haha.. sun_tan is right think by the time when we need to search for the pacifier - it is not glowing liao...

 
Ya Ann i want to bring her home every nite de but my hb & mum says wait till she can slp longer through the nite. My hb say if i tire myself out & fall sick then worse, cos cannot go near bb...



Ica u oso leave bb in the hands of ur mom through the weekdays? i hope this reali is jux 过渡期 as wat u say, must leave a t-shirt worn by me for my bb to smell when i not around

 
Quartzie,

Actually my mom stays with me, so I get to see bb every day, put her to sleep every night but my mom's doing the night feeds during weekdays. I take over when weekends come or public holidays.. But I want to take care of bb for all nite feeds. My mom's thinking the same way as ur hubby lor. I experienced not being able to carry my baby or be near her during my confinement coz I had sore throat and running nose. The feeling sucks- and my mom banned me from being near bb without a mask on. I'm the type that falls sick easily if I dun hv enuf sleep

 
Talking about babies,

Shucks! Keep thinking about my bb today. Yesterday she was quite irritable when putting her to sleep, so I carried her and read her a bedtime story, and she smiled happily at me. Aiya! That image kept playing in my mind. I'm starting to tear liao [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif] I'm thinking should I just stay home, then can see her grow up every day? Sigh...

 
hi ica,

dun be sad, i think im even worse than u..

i sent my bb bek to msia since no one taking care of her here n i dun trust any nanny here..

my gal is quite difficult to handle so i afraid nanny might beat or scold her..

some more my hubby n i usually work til 8/9pm, if she is round,we ll be very stress to rush bek n fetch her ..

every mrng whenever i wake up i ll think of her..i miss her so much [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

also feel wanna to quit but currently got hsing loan n car loan..i really feel very depress whenever i think abt my bb..even cried few times in office [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 
carol,

hugs! dun cry le - you want the very best for your baby so that's why you're here and baby is back in Msia. cheer up hor? your baby will know the sacrifices you're making. shucks! thinking about your situation also make me tear [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif] i've a fren also same situation as you. both she and hubby here but children in Johor, so they travel back every weekend

 
i just sent her bek last sun..

i ll miss many things if i see her 1 week once.. miss 1st time see her turn her body, 1st time she stand up etc..

b4 she bek to msia, she refused to let my hubby or parents to feed her..whenever they wanna to feed her, she ll cry n reluctant to drink milk..but once i carry n feed her, she ll quiet down n finish up the milk..

going bek to see her this week, wonder she still has this habbit or not..

i miss her so much..very envy ur mum willing to come over n take care of ur bb..

 
last time my gal was on EBM..now my milk supply still not yet stop..

but i feel so sad that i pump my milk everyday, but no demand anymore [IMG=http://www.singaporemotherhood.com/forumboard/clipart/sad.gif]

 
So many mummies seem to have gone back to work! I wonder how you all can cope with work and feeding at night. Definitely not easy. For me, I'm thinking of being a stay-at-home mum after my maternity leave. Wonder if anyone also doing that too?

 
Carol:

Hugs! You are not the only person leaving bb in Msia. I’ve heard of many couples who does that. Try to go back to Msia more frequently to see your bb. When she is older, then can bring her back to Spore. That was what one of my friend did. Initially I also hesitated sending my boy to the nanny but I gave it a try anyway coz that’s the only option I have here. If I were to leave bb in Msia, I cannot go back frequently to see him also coz my hometown is really far (Ipoh). Now, my hubby and I have to rush home everyday to pick bb up from the nanny. Very tiring & stressful but guess we have to get use to it. My mum even asked me to let bb stay overnight at the nanny’s during weekdays so I can rest and concentrate on work. I’ll have to see how things go, hopefully I can juggle and continue to bring bb home every night.



I really envy ladies who have their mother or MIL to help them out.

 
For those of you who have stopped BF, have your menstrual cycle come back? I stopped BF for about one month already but still no period while some mummies here who are still BF already got their period. When will period usually come back?

 
Initially we also plan to leave baby to nanny in spore..

but last time my parents stay 1 week here when my hubby away to overseas for business trip, i feel so stressful to rush bek everyday..

so even if we leave her here, we also have no time to spend with her..

stimes really think should i quit as engineer n get other job which allow me to go bek on time..

btw, how you get ur nanny?recommend by other ppl?

until now i still not yet give up to find nanny..but we prefer recommend by frens..

 
vernie,

my menses came back 7 wks after delivery. that time i was still pumping. depends on your body. my fren, her period only came back 5 mths after delivery

 
vernie,

dun give up..i believe you n ur hubby manage to overcome the tiredness and stress..

when u see bb smile at you, you ll feel everything is worthwhile..

menstrual cycle:

i still have some brown spot after 1 mth of delivery..wonder what's that..currently still pump milk everyday..wonder is period or not..

 
Carol:

I found mine through an agent. Then I met the nanny, interviewed her and check out her flat (make sure clean, etc). Difficult to find one recommended by people coz the nanny could be taking care of another bb already. So i just trust my gutfeel & my impression of the nanny and let bb try out. So far so good, thank god!

 
hi vernie,

i called an agent b4..his name is Adrian..

he said once i assigned that nanny, i need to pay 6 mths nanny fees..

so if i want to change nanny w/i 6 mths, my money ll be forfeited..is it true?

 
Re: sleeping thru the nite



Fail again last nite.



10.30pm - fed BB



2am - cried for his milk. Tried putting pacifier, doesn't work. Spit it out & cry louder. No choice, fed him milk.



4.30am - cried again. Tried putting pacifier again, doesn't work. Spit it out & cry louder again! So once again, fed him milk.



What's worse, my BB always same timing wake up (e.g. after 5am, he'll wake up & gets restless, gek here, gek there, scratch & rub his face, eyes, legs kicking, etc & will cry). But yet most of the time he's not hungry cuz i tried feeding him, either he drink abit or won't drink at all. Dunno why also.

 
Taking care of Baby after going back to work



I think we should do what we can handle. Frankly, we are children who had sort of been pampered by our parents. So we are not like last time pple, can work very hard and then come back still look after children, do housework, etc.



For me, I would love to look after my boy every night too but I know I have to have some time to myself for me to do things too and also to rejuvenate my energy. So I would leave him at my in law place for one night per week. Sometime even 2 nights. But never 2 nights in a row. Always alternate.



Maybe you all could try this method and see if you all can get use to it. At first when i start work, I also feel very tiring but now better le. I just need to get use to it.

 
Carol: Don't be sad, at least you know that your baby is in great care. Better than you put her with a nanny whom you dun trust much and keep thinking of whether the nanny is taking good care of baby or not. That day, I brought my boy to the clinic and there is this mummy too.. she also put her BB at M'sia. She say she goes back to see BB once a week and stay for the weekend. I ask her isn't that very tiring... she say yes but when she see BB, she forgets all her tiredness le and she treasure more of her time with BB. She also told me she going to see her BB the next day.. can see her eyes light up when she say that. So there are alot of mummies like you.. you are not alone.

 
Carol:

I also called Adrian. He told me to pay him $80/$90 for his fees and another $600 for nanny's first month salary. How much of the $600 he will pass on to the nanny is between him & the nanny. Second month onwards, I will pay nanny the $600 direct. If I don't like the nanny or if the nanny don't want to take care of my bb anymore, we are to give each other one month notice. Different from what he told you lei...



The funny thing is he arranged for me to meet the nanny without him being there. His reason: don't want to pressure us. After I met the nanny, we exchanged contact number and I engaged the nanny directly! When Adrian called, I just told him I decided not to send bb to nanny. Strange yah? Thought he will want to be there to earn his fees?

 
Ann:

The arrangement you have with your in laws sounds great but I don't have this option since my parents and PILs don't live in Spore. We definitely have to bring bb home from the nanny everyday. So just have to endure and get used to it. In fact, my mum used to leave my sisters with the nanny overnight and only bring them home during the weekends (i was taken care by granny, so i get to go home every night). That's why she suggested that i do the same but I am still taking care at night. Maybe during busy season at work, I will leave bb overnight at the nanny - ad hoc basis.

 
I gave birth on first week of july.. still BF-ing now but menses haven’t come yet.

This morn woke up at 6:30am to pump before preparing for work.

Due to time shortage, I did nt managed to clear a blocked duct that is causing a hard lump on my boob.

Tried to pump during lunch time but still cant manage to massage or pump it out.

How how how.. now the lump very pain ah! I wont be reaching home till 730pm!

 
IFC: The one i sent my son, also is non aircon. I prefer non aircon enviroment also.



pacifier: envy that some of the bb accept it. I try to intro to my son, he will just keep spilt out, unless i hold to it. same as his sister, don like pacifier.

 
Junie,

When ur boy split out the pacifier, is it becos he dun wan or he dunno how to hold the pacifier. Like for mine, I have to hold it for him till he is sleepy then I will let go, if not, sure drop out.



Sweetkiss,

Try using a hanky with hot water n massage the lump?

 
Sweetkiss, why don't you try hand expressing? Massage the lump towards the nipple and massage the aerola area before hand expressing. My LC taught me that previously, when I had a blocked duct.

 
Sweetkiss

U can try this, but will waste ur milk...



Get a towel ready if not paper napkins on from toilet. Place in lap.



Put ur thumb on e block duct. Press on the duct n move ur thumb down towards ur nipple. By doing so, u shd see ur milk squirting out or flowing out. Do this until u feel relief.



If u can can collect e milk u squeeze out in a bottle.



Another thing u can do I warm compress w a towel, massage n then express. But u must do this intermittently... Massage, express n repeat...

 
Jasmine,

I also need to hold it for him. But if the pacifier drop out, he will cry n if I hold it for him, he will continue to suck. Hopefully he will learn to suckle his pacifier properly soon.

 
julie/jellypurin: thanks.. i did press on the lump with my thumb and move it toward nipple for 10 min, but v hard to get the duct cleared. instead milk from other ducts flow out, wasted.. my this duct always blocked one. previously when it happened i used warm towel and press, took me 1 hr+ to clear it. now at work cant go toilet for so long.. the lump on that area already hard like rock and i keep feeling shooting pain on-off.. zzz

 
sun_tan: he won't cry when the pacifier drop out cos i can only try the pacifier out when he is not sleepy or crying for milk. sometime he will suck w/o me holding, but once it drop out, either i need sometime b4 he suck or he will reject it.

then he really want to sleep and start to get cranky, then i will become the pacifier. sign...

 
MY bb fever still not subside yet .. Wonder why i took the 2 japs on him and the oral rotavirus ..



HE is in pain at both legs ..

 


vernie: Ya.. with my own in law, it is more flexible. Maybe you ask the nanny if she can help you take care at for one night per week? Maybe just give her abit more for the night stay. Like that you won't be too shag out.



pacifier: My boy will also spit out if I dun hold the pacifier for him. But then what I do is use his bean pillow and cover it for him.. Don't worry, they will not be suffocated by the bean pillow. My boy like to use the bean pillow to cover his entire face when he sleep.. but of cos, he sleep side way la. He doesn't sleep facing upwards one cos can get scared easily.

 
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