(2008/09) Sep 2008

Rashes
Anyone had rashes during this pregnancy??
I suddenly kenna rashes all over my body over the weekend - Damn itchy lor..
And its disrupting my sleep everynight. Got to scratch and scratch. sob sob
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At one moment, I feel like asking my gynae to induce the baby out
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stefandsean...
how on earth did you suck the blocked duct out youself????!!!!!!!!

alabone
haha, iguess it helps that cy was super cranky and always wanted to latch on then...maybe that prevent many problems with blocked ducts that mummies faced....

sunny
aiyoh, think girls usually harder to wearn leh. think they tend to want the comfort more than boys....poor lil sunny...kekekek...

hey, btw, this one is boy or girl for you?
 
Self-sucking
"......"

Husband sucking
".....LOL....my hb did say he wanted to try but I was the one who got grossed out! HAHAH

Bloom shots
We took some trial ones yesterday, but think my hb's approach to photography a bit different from the bloom shots i've seen. he likes the shots where I make weird faces...I guess maybe it's more "me"...will post the not so horrid ones on FB...bt a bit scared my tummy size will frighten the viewers...
 
I keep telling myself not to get angry, not to get stressed, not to get sad, but one of these days, I'm gonna be driven to depression by that stupid HB of mine. You would have thought that my confinement issue is settled, rite? Since I already agreed to having it done at my place. Then now, he's saying that he's worried that my mom will mess up our place. Of course when you cook, it will be a little messy, won't it? So I told him that and he said I am defending my mom. But of course, she will clean up after that what. Aiyo....

Then he went on to say we have an agreement that his mom will do half while mine will do half. I don't even remember agreeing this with him. I just remember agreeing that my mom will come over instead of my going over. He is now insisting that his mom does half of the confinement. Truth to tell, I don't really like his mom's food, I'm so worried that I will lose my appetite if his mom cooks. And his mom only knows how to cook those few dishes. Haiz... Just when I thought everything is peaceful, something has to come up. I couldn't even sleep well last night.
 
Mummies, will you be compiling a 'Delivery Playlist'? Am trying to load some songs onto my iPod and play it during labour. So far I haven't decided whether I should have fast or slow soundtracks in the playlist. Any suggestions to add on to the list below?

Slow
James Blunt - You’re Beautiful

Fast
Shakira - Hips Don't Lie
 
wingkei
can understand how u feel.
Try to get yr mum do yr confinement first if yr hb insist on his mum doing the other half.
Later on u can say that the bb has grown v attached to YOUR mum le and try not to change person taking care of bb. Else bb will throw tantrum etc... Not sure if this is really a good idea though...
 
skinny pig, you can take some pregnancy-safe antihistamine for your itch. Some mummies get it in the tail end of their last trimester. Your gynae should be able to prescribe your something suitable.
 
storeberry
i hired my own lactation consultant (Christina Kwek) recommended by a fren. She came a few hrs after i birthed baby. So i didn't have sore or bleeding nipples, though i did have a blocked duct after one mth plus. She taught me how to get bb to latch on painlessly. After i went home, she came for 2 visits to follow-up and luckily she did,cos on the first home visit, she cleared my boobs, otherwise i would have become engorged and devd mastitis. Worse thing is that, I didn't even know that and i thot i was doing fine! Luckily she took initiative to fix appt cos she was wondering how come i'm ok!
But I had to pay her of course.
It was worth every cent, cos she also taught me how to prolong the interval in between feeds. GRadually I could pump once every eight hours so when i went back to school, i had no problems with expressing milk.

ava
my hubby also wanted to try sucking themilk and i was so grossed out! I said GET LOST! Such a turn off...

lilboymum, sunny
so lucky u gals. I had wanted to do tandem feeding but too bad bcos of my troublemsome first trimester i had to cut down on bf, and it just slowly dried up by my 3rd mth! So sad! So I reallylook forward to tbf again for baby!
 
Baby sage
i also got those ghorrible itches all over my belly, my gynae gives me calamine lotion and some itchy tablets ,but i didn;t eaten them. But now itch is much better from calamine lotion. hope it helps
 
stef&seanbabes,
how in the world did you do the sucking yourself?????????? i had a mental image of a straw attached to the nipple and the other end, you sucking away... oh my!!! but i know. desperate times call for desperate measures!!!!

by the way, i made hb promise me this time round, that shd i get mastitis again, he will suck and clear my blocked ducts for me! hiakhiakhiak!

l'lcy,
i suppose. nat was such a nice infant to care for mostly. i hardly heard her cry more than 5 times in a day. how i miss the angelic her as compared to now. she cries like 20 times in 5mins now...

ava,
your hb so nice to offer. just let him lah. he can suck and pui out the milk.

wwoooo, you've taken your own bloom shots?? i wanna see.

wingkei,
that hb of yours is ridiculous beyond words. one episode after another. why is he so interfering??? the confinement is YOUR business and YOUR health so why does he keep telling you what to do instead?? I can understand how you try not to let it affect you but the impending thought of him coming up with more nonsense is there so how can you ignore???

I suggest you just tell him you want to do the confinement YOUR way. you prefer to eat your mum's food. does your mil even know how to prepare confinement meals? since you mentioned that she only cooks those few dishes?? ask him that.

i remember that you mentioned before that he suggested for his mum to do the confinement for you in the day, then your mum takes over at night right? is it still going to be like that?
 
skinnypig,
maybe u can chnage your shower foam too. COs even DOVE and Johnson's make me itch during this preg. In the end, I went to buy those without any harmful chemicals like SLS and I was fine.
 
All hospitals should have an in-house lactation consultant. The last time I delivered in May 07 at KKH, I saw one daily over my 2-day stay and basically ask all I needed to know. She was very kind and did a daily 30-mins breast massage to stimulate milk production. You girls should make sure of the free service cos a private LC charges something like $75 per hour for home visit.
 
isabelle
how much did your lactation consultant charge?

Alabone
MAke sure your hb latches on well so he doesnt give you even sorer nipples HAHAHAHA!
 
Any mummies here with kids only one year apart? I have a 14 month old girl and will be delivering my boy soon. My boy's EDD is 13 Sep but now at 34 weeks, he is already 2.8kg so I think he will come in the next two weeks (he was fully engaged at week 29). Can share with me your coping strategies?
 
Ava,
hahahahhahahahahahahahahah!!! ya man! too bad at this stage now i cannot give him 'lessons' coz can stimulate contractions. hahahhahahahahahhahahahahaha!
 
l'lcy,
how i tried to suck myself, is to bend fwd and try to reach the breast and suck lor. Managed to suck but nothing comes out.. hahha
 
hi baby sage,
I'm one of those. i delivered my boy in sept 2005, then my girl in dec 2006. their age gap is about 15.5mths

just to ask, are you a sahm? anyone to help you with the kids?

i've got several friends who take care of two kids by themselves with no other help. and i think their strategy is to set routines. the older child by now should be on some routine? so the best thing is to try and fit the newborn into some sort of routine then things can work out fine. when both nap together, then you can do your own stuff or nap as well.

think l'lcy will be coping on her own too after her second bb is born.
 
<font color="119911">Ava - just saw ur photos on FB! Nice
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Your belly is really low, and huge of cos...but the SM are quite faint lah, no where near the SM photo u posted here some days back!

isabelle (isa_belle) - if u are into week 36 tomorrow, then u are ahead of me! I am only in week 36 next week. Yah, just a couple more weeks to go and our lives will turn upside down...ARRRGGGHHH!!!

isabelle (isa_belle) - 'bandung' milk? That sounds so scary...of all the post-natal issues, potential problems from BFing is what scares me to most!

Wingkei - agree with alabone! This is ur pregnancy so mummy and baby should come first. Be careful not to give in to ur MIL and hubby too much - sure way for a downward spiral into post natal depression.
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babysage,
i delivered my gal in Mar'04 and my son in Nov'05. their age gap is abt 20 months apart. They went to infant care when they were 3 months old.
for #3, i will be quitting my job after maternity leave, so will take care of all 3 of them. but the older 2 will still go to half day childcare as my #1 is entering K1 and #2 is entering nursery next yr.
What i inted to do is to hv a daily fixed schedule. I think it will be easier to manage with a daily routine.
 
Mrs Yap, I wonder if that will work. U think he will buy the idea?

alabone, exactly, one episode after another. Just when I thought everything is peaceful and I am happily looking forward to the arrival of my BB. I don't think he sees that confinement is only my business and I think he wants to get his mother involved as much as possible. I don't know what his mother has been telling him, but this is like for me.. not his mother... so I think I should take priority over his mother's whatever preference, right?

Since we were peaceful for a while, I managed to push things out of my mind, but the nonsense is back again... can't ignore now. haiz... He says things like my mom is unhygienic, etc..... Wondering if eating her food is safe... But she still managed to raise us up! I don't even know if my mil knows how to cook confinement food. She just keeps telling me to take this and that for confinement cos she hears from her friends that eating this and that is good, so probably she will only cook based on what her friends say and I shrink at the thought of it. One thing I feel is that his mom has been asking me if my mom will cook this and that so it gives me the feeling that his mom doesn't mind my mom doing the confinement, so why is my HB then harping on the fact that his mom needs to take a turn too?

Yes, it seems like my HB still wants my mom to take the night shift and his mom takes the day shift so that according to him, my mom can go home in the day. But I refused.... I think it will be too tiring for my mom to do the night shift all the time. I still feel that if his mom wants to do confinement then she should take all the responsibility, not just the easy day job. He is now even refusing to let his mom do the laundry even if she is doing the confinement. When we talk abou things like that, it's my mom who will do my confinement so of course my mom will wash all the dirty laundry. Then what is his mom for?
 
Bigtoes, that's why I'm trying not to let things bother me too much now cos I'm so afraid of falling into post natal depression which my HB doesn't believe in cos he thins it's all in the mind. My mom was not really happy that my HB has to have his way, but eventually, she gave in as she is also afraid that I will fall into post natal depression if she is not there to help.
 
Wow, so abalone and stef&amp;seanbabes are moms of 3? Pei-fu!

I'm a FTWM so currently my girl goes to my in-laws' office with my maid (my in-laws don't help to take care of the girl but they can keep an eye on the maid). The probelm is I'm not sure if my maid can handle one toddler and one newborn in the day. In the night, I plan to let my maid sleeps in my girl's room while the bb boy sleeps with hubby and I (so that his cries in the night won't wake the girl up). Or do you think I should continue to let the girl sleep with us even with her bb brother in the room? My girl is a light sleeper, by the way
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Ava,

U can still eat during labour huh? I only had 2 mouthful of oatmeal b4 they administer the epidural at 8+ am and thankfully my labour only lasted 6.5hrs. Still remembered I pushed until I puked...

stef&amp;seanbabes,

Think I was a bit luckier. Had blocked ducts once and most of the time, TBF was quite ok for me. For that one time, I went down to TMC to look for Mrs Wong. That's when I discovered the tricks (at least for me) to successful breastfeeding --- protein drink and electronic massager. Hence, I stocked up on protein powder (Amway) and used my Osim I-pamper (powerful massager with heat sensor). Super good in getting the milk flow going!!
 
wingkei, better to thrash issues out now. With hormones in the way after the delivery, you may not be able to rationalise things with hubby. Just my humble opinion
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stef&amp;seanbabes/mei
either very flexible or very very busty...my lips will get nowhere near enuf for me to attempt that!

Bigtoes
Lighting lighting lighting!!! even then u can still see it's quite bad...esp when i compare to my preggie shots when i was carrying adan...no marks at all there.
 
Wingkei,

If ur MIL is not doing the laundry then who will be doing it? You cant be bothering with so many housechores during confinement right? You should rest more and concentrate on your health building as your newborn.
My first confinement was done by my MIL but she only cooked that few dishes even though she cooked quite well for normal meals. I din enjoy my confinement at all, always eating that few dishes and im looking after my gal all myself. I dun mind looking her all by myself cos i believe there will be more conflict if i hand her over to my MIL.
The feel is always different de, own mother and MIL. Try to get your mum to do it for you if possible so that you will have the freedom to voice out anything of which u think is not right or uncomfortable. Confinement is already something really impt so you wouldnt want any hiccups too. This time round im getting a CL so hopefully will be better.
Hmmm night shift...if you could you can try to take a few nights so that you will know ur bb well...afterall its your new born right? I do agree with you if ur MIL is doing confinement for you she should take over everything but i think ur hubby just wana get her involved but not wanting her to get too tired so thats y he sugg night shift for your mum..abit unfair though..do try to talk to him....
 
wingkei
In my opinion its better to ask your Hb that we should drop tehj idea of having resposibilities of our mom's .Lets hire a maid, she will do the necessities. confinement is not such like those were in older days. Now everything is just cool. Even i am doing my own. No help except maid for cooking etc. and cleaning.
I guess he will then go for your mom.
 
Xuanting
I think I forgot to answer your qn...yes the meal was TMC meal I didnt go ta bao.

Lok
Hmmm Amway protein powder sounds like a good idea...mebbe i should go get some too
happy.gif
I took that a lot when i did this detox 2 years ago and it was quite OK to drink...
 
Ava, you are the champion. I thought my 33 hour labour was a record and your 70+ hour labour beats me hands down.

It's hard not to eat if one goes through a long labour. I remember asking for food during my last labour but brought everything up during the last stage of labour... and even right after labour. Yeeks!
 
wingkei,
why not just let your mom and your MIL come in daily? and cook whatever they want to cook and you will eat whatever you feel like eating. If really no one washes the laundry, ask your mom to help out...just dump them into the washing machine and sun them when its ready. Dont bother too much lah. Either your mom and MIL will get along like good frens after 1 month or tear their hair out...one will back out after 1 month of confinement. Any dispute, let your hubby handle, since he is the one who suggest the arrangement. No point arguing with him..so much to learn and do after you give birth...i dont think you have the energy to bother except for resting, eating, feeding and caring for your bb.

I also foresee my MIL will come by (hopefully not daily). Hope my CL will get along with my MIL but my hubby says, the CL should take instructions from us not my MIL. If his mom tries to be indian chief...he will tell her off...same goes for my mom. The most impt thing is that we care for the bb well and for me to rest.

Dont think too much...
happy.gif
 
Baby Sage
I only had epidural after about 60 hours...so before then I ate, but didnt eat for the last 8-10 hours so no puking...
 
BabySage, I know. I'm already kinda mentally prepared for fights with him during my confinement.

Jen Kate, you understood me perfectly! I thought I was the only one facing this problem. Well, I'm definitely not going to do the laundry, I will make my HB do them if nobody is doing. But men don't understand that the feel is different when it comes to own mother doing and mil doing. Mine doesn't see the difference, just insisted that his mom has a turn too. That's why I keep feeling that he is thinking more for his mom than for me, doesn't understand my needs. I really regretted not getting a CL in the first place, at least that way, no argument over who's doing. I will certainly look after my BB some nights, but my mom suggested that she also looks after some nights so that I can get more rest. But his mom never says anything to that extent at all, nor did my HB, which is also why I'm feeling unjustified cos they seem to just want the easy job. I've given up on talking to him about this, just make myself unhappier and upset.

rinku, he's totally against the idea of having a maid. I once hinted to him that many of my friends, though they didn't have a full time maid, at least a part-time helper so that when they go back to work, they have someone to help clean the house. He was like... I knew you would want that too.. but no.... don't want to spend the money. He would do the cleaning. Then the next day, he can tell me that it will be ME doing the cleaning of the house. He said I will be on ML so lotsa time to do EVERYTHING! Maybe he still thinks that having a baby is not as a lot of work as I make it out to be. And he won't say go for my mom, he will be happy to say, go for HIS mom!
 
Delivery Music
Can we bring our own MP3 player into the delivery ward? I see that jewellery lah, nail polish are banned.. I wonder is MP3 player banned as well??
I dun think I wanna to play the CD directly from the hospital player cos’ my delivery music abit ‘adrenalin-pumping’… too noisy liao :S

Bloody breastmilk
Erm… looks gross to still feed bb wif bloody breastmilk… will it taste abit ‘bloodly’ as well? :S
Btw, wat is mastitis? Sounds quite SCARY leh…

Blocked ducts
Erm.. so wat is the best antidote to clear blocked ducts? Yah, to get hubby to suck it out will not work…. Unless they are super duper horny which I seriously doubt so lo with a hungry bb crying away and we smells like sour milk? LOL
Bt Stef, I can visualize how flexible u are to reach ur nipples then!!! LOL… bt of coz, I dun think u find it funnie at that pt of time cos u are so desperate liao..

Isabelle
How much do u pay for home visit LC consultant? I dun mind paying if my milk got stuck…. Somehow…

Eating in Delivery Ward
Erm… we can request our hubby to bring in food to our mouth at delivery ward huh???
 
Ava and Babysage,

From your post, the natural birth way seems to be so traumatising! I am still deciding if i should have it the natural birth way or CS..My gynae definitely suggest natural, since my baby's head is already partially engaged at 36w now.

Heard from some of my frens that in fact, CS seems a better option out for them, cos some of them suffer from piles cos of natural birth, but the CS wounds heal fast for them.

My hubby suggested CS for me, cos I am also asthmatic. I am not sure if i can go through the long hours of labour, with tight chest and stuff...

Anyone forummers has done CS with GA or epi?? Do you all face any problems with either of the 2? Dunno why, dont dare to tell the gynae tt i might be opting for CS..
 
Wingkei,

U are experiencing what i went thru during my first confinement, my hubby can come home from work asking me can u ask the bb not to cry and why is here and there smell like milk. I think i got abit of depression from him and my MIL. However this time round really different for me and him. After being a father for more than 2 yrs and confirming that i did not have a proper confinement done previously from 2 chinese physician, he volunteered to pay for a CL cos he can really see my health deteriorating for this second preg. My MIL called him to volunteered for doing my confinement this time round too but guess what it was my hubby who turns her down totally. So i guess man always take thing too lightly.

I hope you wont suffer like me if you are gng to have a second baby so i think if u cant talk to ur hubby u can try seeking as much help from ur mum. Ask her to come by even if its ue MIL turn to do the confinement and u to take over afew nights cos its also part of our responsibility as a mum and ur mum to take over afew nights when u r tired. So both of u rotate to rest and i believe your hubby will have nothing to protest since u already agree to his mum doing half of the confinement but make sure you make ur hubby work when your MIL is doing it for you and let him realise that its actually ALOT of work to be done and if he wans to sayang his mum than he will have to take over. Can always pass all the hardwork to your mum. Think its more workable for you to talk to your mum and have a strategy in mind..dun bother to argue with ur hubby that will make your relationship sour.. so let him realise it by making him do all the work that his mum cant do...
 
bacon&amp;egg, that's what I had in mind, except that my mom will be staying over. His mom doesn't need to cos she lives very near. So I thought let my mom stay over, and if his mom wants to come over everyday, or to help out a little, it's all fine. But HE had to insist that our moms take turns doing the confinement, which get me really irritated. The picture that I painted above seems so perfect, why does he need to go mess it up or something? haiz....
 
mobile, but the good thing is you don't remember anything about the pain after delivery! It's not that bad, really. The first 30 hours were bearable and I only ask for epidural for the last 3 hours (by then I was 7cm dilated). Healing was a breeze too with natural birth. I remember hubby asking me if I want to go for a movie the week after I deliver cos I was up and about the very next day *Faintz*
 
avalyn,
not busty la. u see me before le.. not the least busty.
happy.gif
I was wearing only size 75B when i was breastfeeding.. just that i really had to bend low and push breast into mouth and to try to suck the blocked ducts. Desperate already le. No other choice.

goldfish,
bloody breastmilk looks like strawberry milk or bandung
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will it taste bloody ? dunno le. never tried. but i guess baby will not be able to differentiate the taste of blood.
happy.gif

Mastities refers to breast infection. sometimes prolonged blocked ducts causes mastities. cos the milk in the block ducts causes infection.
some information abt mastities: http://www.askdrsears.com/html/2/T022200.asp

the best antidote to clear blocked ducts is to let ur baby latch on.
 
wingkei, men sometimes are just too dense to understand that caring for a newborn is a full time and demanding job. He may understand it better when baby comes. Just leave him and the baby alone for a day and he will know how tough it is. Thereafter, maybe he will be more understanding and listen to you more?
 
mobile
Like BabySage, altho i had long labour, i was up and about the next day, smsing friends and walking about...u really dont remember anything much of the labour itself once u have the baby in your arms
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alabone: yeah, my mom also fed us with bloodied BM...think it's made of your own blood anyway...

ava: your TMC menu is special? pasta with roast duck...yummmy!

stef&amp;sean: how to self-suck? won't your neck be twisted?! Either that your boobs must be very long and large to be able to reach your mouth!!! LOL. HB sucking is a great solution. He can hv a cup of coffee at the same time
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skinnypig: what hv u been using? Palmers?
 
Wingkei
Haiz.. I marvel at ur level of patience towards ur HB. I would have quarreled with him BIG BIG time and may even turn violent cos my preggy hormones is making me edgy and quarrelsome at times wor.

Bt on a serious note, I think it is useless to ‘debate’ wif him. U wanan to get someone ‘superior’ to talk to him like ur PAPA or if u have an elder brother to ‘chu-tou’ for u?? I think he dun take ur words seriously one lo… And oso, I think it is so UNFAIR to get ur mama do nite shift all the way!!! Even hospital nurses do rotating shift leh!
 
wingkei,

i agree with babysage..leave him with bb for a day...my hubby too become more understanding after i keep pushing him to my gal a couple of times..i even managed to make him to take up the challenge to take care of her all by himself for a day..and finally after afew rounds he agrees with me liao..
 
Goldfish: TMC's lactaction consultant per time is about $42 I recall.

wingkei: If your mom takes that night shift, then she can't do the laundry anymore. It'll be your MIL.

Who will do the marketing for you then? Who will cook the confinement food for you? The day shift MIL?

WHo is younger and fitter? MIL or MOM? Let the younger one take the night shift lor...

If I were u, I'd get a maid or at least a CL for this trying period...

btw, who's going to look after your bb after your ML? MIL or MOM?
 
ava, babysage,

Same like you, i believe more in natural birth, cos its also beneficial for the baby as she will be able to pass through the birth canal and the water in her lungs can be passed out to allow her to breathe properly. But the long hours seems scary, plus on top of that i got asthma..dunno how much it will affect me when the pushing really comes.
 

Jen Kate, I do foresee that happening to me as well, about my HB asking about milk smell, the place being dirty, etc. He is a cleanliness freak, and can't stand a single dirt. I also foresee getting depression from him and my mil but he would never understand that HE is the one causing the depression. I just hope he will also come ot his senses one day like your hubby did. I think you does have a sound strategy there, I think I will go for it. I really must make him work then he will realise how much work it is. I hope my mom won't feel bad about being there when it's my mil's turn to do the confinement.
 
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